I just deleted a draft post that’s been sitting there for a week. It was a post about how much I love the Olympics (which I REALLY DO), but I just couldn’t finish it.

Why?

I’ve been embroiled in other things. Things that are taking me away from blogging. Half-marathon training (which is going SLOWLY, might not make it by the end of October ), managing the bounty of produce from my garden and studying.

Studying?

Yeah, studying. While I’m not at liberty to discuss at this time, I can tell you that it’s big. Big enough to turn things upside down and downside up!

However, before I can announce anything, I have to finish studying. Which will take some time!

Meanwhile, look at these photos of the various men’s water polo teams from the Olympics. Oh yes.

Here’s a refresher:

This year, I have a house with a backyard and I’ve planted my own garden! I had some failures (my peas didn’t do so hot), some successes (my green beans and kohlrabi are delightful) and some downright horrific levels of plenty.

Remember my obsession with kale last year? This year, I planted four rows of kale from seed, thinking that half of it would die in the growing process.

I was wrong.

Remember when I bought the two giant bags of kale at the farmers market and lamented that I could only buy it once a week in this kind of quantity?

I pick that much every three days.

Poor Tim has made the comment “so what kind of kale are we having for dinner tonight?”

*sheepish grin*

What has also grown well beyond all hopes and dreams is my summer squash plant. Rather than go the typical zucchini route, I planted its yellow sister.

I pulled this out of my garden today, after seeing nothing there three days ago:

I think I will call this one Gigantor the Almighty.

In addition to Gigantor, I have 6 more of the yellow bastards I need to do something with. Here’s my short-term plan:

1. Slice and grill some for sandwiches.
2. Shred and make chocolate chip zucchini muffins.
3. Saute and serve with pasta?
4. Run around screaming “OMG WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH ALL THIS SQUASH?!?”

Never mind that I have to pick my kale…again…and I’m sure I’ll fill 3 grocery bags worth.

I fear the great quantities of garden bounty are making me crack.

ERMAHGERD…SQUERSH!

See? Losing it.

Who ordered a ticket to the gun show?

Ten Things I Learned From Doing A Triathlon:

1. You can never train enough for the swim.
2. Training for the swim in a pool (when the swim is in a lake/pond) is ineffective. Also, see #1.
3. Don’t shift too fast into your big ring on the front lest you have the chain completely fall off your bike.
4. If the hill you’re biking up is too steep, just get off and walk it up. Nobody’s going to penalize you for it. Plus, your legs will thank you.
5. Hydrate hydrate hydrate.
6. Gu packs are your friend.
7. People are willing to shit themselves and keep going rather than stop and not shit themselves. (from observation, not practice – I’m not THAT hardcore!)
8. Planning your race pace ahead of time is useful in making sure you have enough “gas in the tank” once you get to the run.
9. Swimming sucks. It really, really does.
10. That I’ll never do another one ever again.
________________________

The sprint triathlon (0.25 mi swim/12 mi bike/3.1mi run) I did on Sunday was my first and will be my last. Why? I hate swimming.

As a kid, I loved to swim. But, in the 30-some years since then, I have fallen out of love with it – especially swimming in a lake. I can’t fathom how much fish poop is floating around in that water and when you’re swimming in a race, there’s a high probability that you’re going to get some in your mouth. ICK!

Anyway, back to the story. Since I don’t like swimming, I made sure that I would train to swim twice the distance non-stop (i.e. 0.5mi) in a lap pool. Aside from the turnarounds (where I didn’t hang on the edge or touch the bottom of the pool), I didn’t stop once. I had a good time split and I felt great. I’m a pretty experienced cyclist and I know what my pace times are for running, so I found a tri pace calculator online to plug in what my finish time would be.

Note: I’m slow. Really slow. I know this. But my goal was to finish and not kill myself.

Using my various paces – and generously estimating that my transitions would take 4 minutes because I had no idea – I came up with a race pace time of 1:43:46:
- Swim: 13:40
- T1: 4:00
- Bike: 46:27
- T2: 4:00
- Run: 35:39

I felt confident.

Until race day.

It was so hot and humid – even at 6:30am – I was sweating buckets just standing there. I was really glad I had the foresight to set up 5-1L bottles of water in my transition station/bike and had 4 Gu packs and one of the bottles of water with a Gu electrolyte tablet for the bike ride. Saved my butt.

What didn’t save my butt was the swim. Dear gawd that sucked. Let’s just say it felt WAY longer than a quarter mile. But, I only got kicked once! Go me!

Actual swim time: 16:45

Shit.

I was already a full 3 minutes off pace! That must’ve made me hustle, because my T1 time was 1:59! Woot! I give credit to my sockless Keen bike shoes. Quick on/off.

The biking was awesome. I wanted to just go out and crush those 12 miles, but I held back because I knew I had a 5k ahead of me after the bike and if I blew out my legs now, I wouldn’t be able to run. But damn that was so difficult to do!

A note: halfway through this bike leg – which went through rolling hills that meant a lot of shifting gears – was a MONSTER Category 5 hill. I went and scoped it out the day before, and it was ~0.6mi long…and STEEP. Yikes.

Speaking of shifting, my chain fell off my bike on a nice, flat straightaway!!! I wanted to go faster than the 20mph I was managing on my middle ring, so in my enthusiasm, I shifted to the big ring too fast and my chain fell right off.

SONOFABIT..

I had to do some quick side-of-the-road bike repair, getting covered in chain grease in the process. I think it took all of 2-3 minutes to fix it, but that and the loss of momentum really wrecked my time for a good 5-6 minutes.

Back to the recap. When I got to the monster hill, I went up approximately a quarter of it, then I said “fuck this” and got off and walked the bike up the rest of the way. The funny thing is that my walking was only a tenth of a mph slower than my biking speed. Plus, my legs got a much-needed stretching out. The rest of the ride, other than me passing a bunch of people, was uneventful. Time: 51:42.

T2 was just as fast as T1: 2:00 flat

The run! By then the sun was scorching and the heat index was well into the 90s. I had a bottle of water that I froze the night before and by the time of the run had melted, but was still cool. Between that and the water stops, I dumped more water on my head and neck than I ingested (I did empty two bottles of water on the bike, though, so I was hydrated). My plan was to run for 1:30-2:00 minutes and walk for 30 seconds and it was the best decision I made as I was passing a lot of other people who just ran out of gas and could only manage a walk.

Run: 34:56

Total time: 1:47:20

I was TIRED. Really tired.

Just shy of 4 minutes slower than my guess – and if I hadn’t lost the chain on my bike, I would’ve beat that time. But since my goal was to finish: mission accomplished.

Also, I wasn’t last! I beat eight other people!

Now I can check it off my list and not have to do one ever again. Unless I do a team tri where I can do the bike (preferred) or run leg. Otherwise, I’m going to stick to running.

I am looking into doing some duathlons (run/bike/run) in the future! Always a glutton for punishment.
_________________________

My nephew told my husband a story this weekend about a friend of his that rides quads (a four-wheel off road vehicle) who is immensely talented and races semi-pro, however, he also has MS. When asked why he still rides, my nephew said “it’s because one day, he won’t be able to and he wants to do it while he still can.”

So inspiring!

It’s similar to why I do these things: to not only prove to myself that I can, but because I can. There’ll be a time when I’m unable to do these things and I don’t want to have any regrets as to the things I should’ve done when I had the chance.

As my friend Meredith says, “just keep moving forward!”

Next up: half-marathon training!

Well, turns out I CAN swim!

Granted, it wasn’t in open water, but last week I tried swimming as many laps as I could without stopping. I was able to do 11 laps (~1/3 of a mile)! Considering I’m only going to have to do a 1/4 mile, this made me happy. Also, I swam again yesterday and did 1/2 mile without dying from exhaustion! Combine that with a successful (if slow) bike/run brick, running a couple 4+ milers and one final bike/run brick scheduled for tomorrow, I feel like I’m in really good shape to finish the race without too much agony!

This is GREAT NEWS!

Other than my neurotic packing list-making, I’m ready for this! Woot woot!

* * * * *

The rest of the week in pictures:

AMAZING food truck sushi:

Revisiting an old food truck favorite:

Pulled pork. Pickled onions. Cojita cheese. Salsa verde. Perfection!

Also, my garden has been going INSANE! Here’s one (of many) pickings of strawberries from my garden:

And the first few blueberries off my blueberry bush!

(After I ate 2 of them! )

I’m beginning to think I was a bit overzealous in planting four rows of kale this year. My first picking (off only two of the rows!) yielded a grocery bag full of kale and it barely looks like I did anything.

I foresee a lot turkey kale bean soup in my future!

Wish me luck!

No, not THAT kind of super freak!

I’m talking about how I’m starting to freak out a little bit about the triathlon. Mainly: the swimming.

Over the past few days I’ve had these thoughts:

I’m going to drown!

There’s no way you’ll be able to finish!

What if there’s fish?*

I won’t be able to SEE!**

I’m not going to be able to finish!

I’m going to drown!

As you can see…I’m being quite rational about this. By “rational” I mean “irrational as hell.”

Before I did the half-marathon in 2010, I had an epic meltdown on the drive down (just ask my husband) because of the seemingly insurmountable task ahead of me.

Thirteen point one miles?!?! I’ve only been able to run up to ten! (insert hysterical crying and freaking out here)

It wasn’t pretty. Thinking back, I’m usually the calm, level-headed one in times of crisis and I usually don’t freak out. Not like that.

I made it through the half marathon relatively unscathed*** – slow, but unscathed.

That’s the biggest problem I’m having with the tri. Yes, I’m undertrained for it, I’ve come to accept it. I just want to finish.

However, I know there will be times when I need a rest. With running, you can just slow down (or walk) if you get tired.

Biking? Don’t pedal/coast or shift down to an easier gear (or walk the bike up the insane 1 mile long hill 5 miles into the 12 mile bike leg****).

With swimming? Um…beats me. All I can think of is “stop swimming” which means “drown.” I could float, but that’s just delaying the inevitable.

It’s too bad they don’t make mirrors you can strap to your head so you can do the backstroke and see where you’re going…lol.

Anyway, back to the matter at hand. I’m freaking out because I don’t know what’s going to happen. Part of why I’m so good at my job is that I can research and anticipate and plan for anything so all the events I coordinate and projects I work on run smoothly.

With this, I can’t plan! Oh sure, I can read blog post after blog post about how “you’re going to freak out in your first open water swim” or how “you really should use a wetsuit” or that people will kick you in the face.

I want none of that!

I just want to have a good time***** and finish. But the more research I do, the more worried I get.

How do I calm my overthinking brain down so I don’t end up rage quitting the race? Or just so I don’t drown. That would be good.

_______

* – Fish nibbling on me?! *shudder*
** – considering the possibility of no contact lenses for the race, this one could be valid.
*** – “unscathed” meaning “I couldn’t walk frontways down the stairs for three days afterward”
**** – I wish I was kidding. It’s a CATEGORY 5 CLIMB.
***** – as much fun as one can have while punishing their body for 1 to 2 hours.

Some call me “Ms. Magoo” after the Mr. Magoo cartoon character. Yes, it’s that bad.

I also have really dry eyes.

I discovered this about 15 years ago when I was a daily contact lens wearer and was experiencing double vision. Turns out wearing contacts – combined with a natural lack of tear production – was creating “dehydrated corneas”, which were causing the double vision.

Thus, I wear glasses all the time, and I wear contacts only when I’m doing sports activities.

The last time I had a fitting for contact lenses was approximately eight years ago and I had gotten down to the last pair of lenses in my box of “daily” wear lenses a few weeks ago. Since Tim expressed interest in getting contacts for running, I set up appointments for both of us to get fitted for lenses on the 4th.

Except I had an infection. In. My. EYES.

All I had been experiencing (I thought) was my seasonal allergies: dry, itchy eyes! How could I have an infection?

Anyhoo, he put me on an ocular antibiotic and told me that I couldn’t wear contact lenses until this clears up.

(Um…doesn’t he know I’m training for a triathlon?!?)

I was ordered to use the drops three times a day and come back in a week to get fitted for contacts. Over the past week I struggled running and biking with my regular, non-sports compatible prescription sunglasses. Not fun.

Fast forward to yesterday. The infection is only down about a third. A THIRD?!?

The treatment now – in addition to the continued contact lens ban – is using lubricating drops liberally throughout the day and he hopes (HOPES!??!) that it’ll clear up in two weeks. If not, he’s going to refer me to a corneal specialist to see why I continue to have an infection.

ARGH!!

If there are any of you out there reading this, please send healing vibes to not only get this infection licked but to allow me to not do a swim leg of a triathlon blind like Mr. Magoo!

* * * * *

In other news, I got a new pair of sunglasses! I’m so trendy…

I’m having a bit of panic over the triathlon, which is in 19 DAYS!

The swimming. I’m not going to be able to swim in a lake (unless I swim the race course the day before) until the day of the event. So, in order to make myself feel better, I’m going to swim as much as possible before the race.

However, I realized this weekend I have a secret weapon in my arsenal: the bike.

After a whirlwind week – one where I had to take ocular antibiotics due to an eye infection (and meaning I couldn’t wear my contacts) – I finally got my new Terry saddle installed on the bike and took her out for a long ride on Saturday in the 90+ degree heat and humidity right around the noon hour.

The course was a nice winding course with rolling hills and a few challenging climbs and a delightful straight, flat stretch where I got the bike up to ~23mph. All in all, I did 11 miles with little to no effort and had 14mph average speed.

Not bad for the first time out this year, huh?

Now that I have a fantastic bike saddle, those miles will fly by.

If only the swimming would go as smoothly…

I swear the world is fighting against me to thwart my efforts in training for the triathlon on July 1st. I never had this much trouble training for a half-marathon!

I think I narrowed it down to these things:

1. New house/garden.
I’ve never had a vegetable garden before, and the prep work for that has been a lot of work. I also have established plants (asparagus & strawberry patch) that need maintenance and picking on a nearly daily basis. Also, putting the final touches on the house eats up time.

2. Social life.
I know, wah wah wah. I have an active social life. But, having SO many things going on – especially on nights and weekends (my prime workout time) – it puts a cramp in my training schedule.

3. Work stress.
My job – compared to what it was 2 years ago when I was training for the half – has exploded in terms of workload and responsibilities. I’m more mentally exhausted at the end of the day and as a result, it makes it damn hard to get motivated.

4. Eating healthier.
Since the move and due to the above factors, I seem to have less time to cook and plan meals. Which means we’re either eating out or getting takeout a lot more than we used to and I’m getting frustrated with that. Thus, more of my focus is shifting to cooking healthier dinners.

5. Training time.
I can train for running events in a relatively short amount of time on any given day because all I have to do is:

1. put on workout clothes,
2. put on running shoes, and
3. GTFO.

With the bike, there’s:

1. put on cycle clothing,
2. put on cycle shoes,
3. get water bottles filled up,
4. get bike down from garage rafters and check the tire pressure and address any other mechanical issues,
5. put on helmet and gloves,
6. make sure I have my phone in case of mechanical issues, and
7. GTFO, and
8. upon return, put everything away.

And swimming?

1. find swimsuit, goggles and swim cap; pack in gym bag,
2. find two towels; pack in gym bag,
3. make sure lock AND KEY for the locker room is in the bag,
4. drive to the gym,
5. change into swim clothes,
6. shower and get hair wet before putting on swim cap (mama don’t need green hair, yo!),
7. swim (a.k.a. GTFO)
8. shower to rinse out chlorine,
9. change into regular clothes,
10. drive home, and
11. shower for real.

I don’t count “showering” after running and biking because I usually shower later in the evening after I’ve stopped sweating. No sense showering if I’m still sweating! But with the pool, I can shower once I get home. Why at home? Well, it’s just less crap I have to pack and haul to the pool and frankly, showering (for real) at the gym sucks. But I do need to get the chlorine out of my hair, so I can’t skip it.

Yes, I know the packing stuff with the swimming can be done ahead of time, but it still takes time regardless of *when* I do it. It also doesn’t take that much time. It’s the driving and changing clothes two times that does it.

And I know what some of you are thinking: “Carolyn, why don’t you just work out in the morning?” For those of you who haven’t had the “joy” of seeing me in the morning, I have an alter-ego named GROG who acts a lot like Drunk Hulk over on Twitter and GROG hates getting up early.

(not me, but pretty damn close as to my morning attitude – except more grumpy)

Plus, the few times I tried it, I was so stressed out trying to get everything done before work and was tired/ravenous the rest of the day. Mornings + me = bad.

* * * * *

I saw my cousin who is three years my junior this weekend at my niece’s graduation party – the same cousin who signed up to do a half marathon, the Warrior Dash and now this tri and goaded me into doing the same – and she’s in worse shape than I am. I’m not sure when I got or why I have this sense of competition with her, but I do. Having her tell me that she’s “seriously going to die” doing the tri somehow made me feel better.

I’ve swam a quarter mile already. Albeit, not all at once, but I did that my first (and only) time in the pool! I’m pretty confident if I get to the pool at least 4 more times between now and July 1, I’ll be in good shape. Besides, I’m just shooting to finish, not be super-fast or anything.

Once I install my new saddle on the bike, I’ll be stoked to GTFO and put some miles on. Unless my body/fitness has changed dramatically over the past 3 years, I’ll be able to knock out a 13 miler with no trouble.

With the running, I’m up to 30 minutes nonstop running and I did 4 miles on Saturday. Granted, I had a pee break 1.5 miles in and the last mile was more of a 2min run, 30sec walk. So in the next month, I want to get up to 6 miles running (w/no breaks) and I should be OK doing the 5k after the swim/bike. Going to do some bricks of bike/run the week before the race too.

All in all, I should be in good shape.

My goal: to finish.

And beat my cousin.

So am I a failure? Considering, I think I’m doing pretty well.

I’m being slow in training for the triathlon. Slow as in “not training at all.”

I’ve been swimming a total of ONCE in the past two and a half weeks.

Still haven’t taken the bike out for a spin.

And I haven’t run more than 2.5 miles (and a run/walk at that!) at any given time.

I want to start pushing my training up to another level, but I can feel old, nagging injuries bugging me if I even try. Left hip flexor. Right piriformis. Left ankle still healing from that sprain two months ago.

Frustrating.

Plus, with so much stress going on at work, my diet has been TERRIBLE. Eating out a lot, not making healthy choices when we do, and drinking extra calories with the wine and beer I’ve been having with dinner. The stress is also wreaking havoc with my sleep patterns, which makes me tired and depressed.

Something has to change.

I know I hate the “counting calories” business, but I also need to start accounting for the fun sized Twix bars that I just mindlessly hoover in the afternoons (damn co-workers and their candy) and the glasses of wine I have in the evening. That’s a lot of calories that I’m not even thinking about. Calories that if I remove from my diet, I’ll drop some weight and make this training easier on me.

I’m going to use the My Fitness Pal site and Android app to keep track of what I’m eating and make a workout plan that I can (hopefully) stick with. The next two weeks are going to be HELL for making this change, but once I put my mind to something, gol’ darnit, I’m going to do it. I’m tired of feeling fat, old and unable to do the things I want to do with my life.

So there!

I started going to my personal trainer’s “boot camp” class on Tuesday. It’s an hour-long circuit training class and I can still feel the burn today! I really, really wish my ankle would get back to normal so I can start hammering out walking lunges again. They hurt like a mother, but it’s the best thing to do for my hip flexor/piriformis issues.

Now the plan!

Here’s my workout plan for the next two weeks, starting on Sunday:

Tonight I’m going to do a short, two-mile run before Boot Camp, tomorrow night I’m going to shoot for a three-mile run (hopefully with Tim). Saturday we’re going to be busy hosting friends for a party we’ve been planning for a month. While I know I’m going to eat the bratwurst and the ice cream, I’m not going to overindulge.

BE STRONG.

————-

For those of you out there who know how to fix bikes, can you recommend a good, beginner level book to pick up? I’m mechanically inclined, so I’m not afraid of doing things myself, but I also need to know how to change a bike tire, swap out a new saddle and adjust my clipless pedals!

Thanks in advance!

One year ago today I was marrying the love of my life in the desert.

This past year has had its ups and downs, its tragedies and its triumphs; yet it feels like only yesterday.

This calls for some Al Green…