Health on the Run

Facts About Injury

Lauren — Tue, 15 May 2012 20:45:39 +0000

Fact Number 1: Not running for long periods of time can be depressing. But we already covered that one.

Fact Number 2: You will never want to run so badly as you do when you are sidelined because of an injury. On any given day, I enjoy running. But when I’m injured? There is nothing else in this world that I’d rather do than run. I talk about running as if it’s the most important thing in my life. And insist that I will probably die if I don’t get to run soon…as in tomorrow.

Fact Number 3: You are going to gain weight. I’m sorry, but it’s true. There’s no way you can go from doing high levels of physical activity to doing practically nothing and maintain your weight in the process. Unless you starve yourself, which I’m not really in the habit of doing.

[Number 3a: You can pretend you're okay with this, but secretly you are not. Or at least...I'm not. I hate the way my muscles are no longer as strong as they used to be. I hate not feeling fit. And I hate the timing of it all. In case you were wondering, packing on the pounds before a wedding - an event where you will not only be in front of a bunch of people but that will be captured forever in photographs - is not exactly ideal. And yes, that is my vanity coming through.]

Fact Number 4: You may be willing to compromise some of your principles all in the name of healing.

Glucosamine Chondroitin is good for joints. But it is not vegetarian.

Fact Number 5: Even elite runners get injured. And they don’t always handle it very well either.

Jocelyn tweeted a link to this video the other day and I just had to share. Not that I’ve been there… (You can also watch here)

Fact Number 6: You learn to adjust your plans

Besides running Boston, my big running plans for the year included doing a bunch of shorter races over the summer. I was looking forward to changing up my training by running short and fast. Instead, I am changing up my training by resting…a lot.

Rest and recovery ultimately make you stronger, right? ……right??

Fact Number 7: You waver between being incredibly motivated to get better, and wanting to do nothing but sit around in your sweats eating ice cream. Especially when stressful life things happen and all you really want to do is go for a good, hard run.

This is pretty much how I spend all my free time these days…

Fact Number 8: You start to think maybe you weren’t meant for running after all. And devise a plan to cheat on your (once) favorite sport with a new one.

Fact Number 9: These plans never last more than a day or so. Because deep down inside you know that you are locked into this relationship with running for the rest of your life. For better or for worse.

Fact Number 10: Even though you know you should take things one day at a time, sometimes it just feels better to have exciting races on the horizon, as crazy as your plans may be.

I know this is old news at this point, but I’m excited to be running Hood to Coast this August with Nuun. …as long as I can get myself up and running in time to train for it!

But since that wasn’t enough, I went ahead and signed up for another big marathon that’s been on my list for a long, long time.

Dear NYC - Please don’t break my heart like Boston did. I don’t think I could stand it.

—-

In related news, if you’re in the market for some Nuun, you can use the promo code bloggerslovenuun for 15% off your order. I don’t make a single penny from it, but I love being able to save you money!

The Weight of the Nation

Lauren — Mon, 14 May 2012 23:19:19 +0000

Just a quick, last minute PSA in case you haven’t heard…

Tonight is the premiere of a new HBO documentary called The Weight of the Nation. This four-part documentary is a collaboration between HBO and the Institute of Medicine that basically serves to give Americans a wake up call about the dire consequences of this obesity epidemic we find ourselves facing.

You can watch the trailer below (or click here if the embedded video doesn’t work):

Tonight’s show is actually two parts - the first one looking at the consequences of the obesity epidemic and the second highlighting the science around how to lose weight, maintain it, and prevent weight loss. Parts 3 & 4 will air on May 15th.

Don’t worry, you don’t need HBO to watch the series. HBO will be streaming all four parts of the documentary here.

For more information, please click here.

If you watch, let me know what you think! Chances are I’ll be blogging about it at some point…

Road to Recovery: The Plan

Lauren — Wed, 02 May 2012 20:39:40 +0000

Thank you all for not dismissing me as a spoiled, whiny brat after my last post. (And if you thought it, thanks for at least keeping it to yourself). I appreciated every single comment, as well as the reality checks some of you gave me – even if you didn’t know you were doing it at the time.

After a little bit of self-reflection, it became pretty clear that I kept sinking into despair about this bum knee of mine because I didn’t really have a plan. Instead, I was just looking down the long, seemingly endless tunnel of injury without seeing a light. But as Meggie so wisely recommended, it’s much better to take this whole injury thing day by day. As depressing as it may sound, constantly looking ahead to a time when I (might) be able to run again was just doing more harm than good. The only thing I know for certain is that I cannot run today. Which means that today, I need to do whatever I can to help myself heal.

And that means that it was time to sit down and finally work out a plan for this recovery phase of my “training.” As tempting as it is to sit on my butt and drown my sorrows in a bucket of ice cream (not that that has happened…), doing so day after day is damaging to my health and my relationships. And since I don’t really want EC to call off the wedding, I think it’s about time I pull myself together.

Road to Recovery

Step 1: The Plan

I probably don’t need to say this BUT…please remember that I am not a doctor – or any sort of medical professional. This is the plan I’ve come up with by combining some doctor’s advice with a whole lot of research. I can’t even guarantee that it’s going to work for me, so please don’t take it as advice for your own situation.

1.) Stop taking prescription anti-inflammatory medication

Okay, so I know this goes completely against the recommended treatment. Since the pain you feel when you have Runner’s Knee is caused by inflammation, it makes sense to take a drug aimed to reduce that inflammation.

However, I had been taking the pills daily for the past two and a half weeks. Although it was definitely helping my knee, I’m pretty sure it had started giving me some not-so-great side effects. I was feeling fuzzy-headed all the time, not to mention how rough the drugs were on my stomach. So I decided it was time to give myself a little break. I haven’t taken the pills for several days now, and the fuzziness in my head has completely disappeared. Whether there is actual science behind this or it’s all in my head doesn’t really matter at this point.

But, since I understand the benefits of doing something besides icing to keep the inflammation down, I decided to replace the prescription pills with a low dose of over the counter ibuprofen…for now.

2.) No running

As I mentioned a few days ago, I haven’t really allowed myself a long period of time without running at all. The runs that I have gone on have been short and slow. Which means that not only are they not really doing much for me physically (a slow 2 miles isn’t really all that effective when you’re used to running 7), but they most likely weren’t aiding my recovery either. At the moment, I’m on a minimum one week running ban, knowing full well that it could be 2 or 3 (I refuse to think further into the future than that).

3.) Learn to love the bike

Even when I feel motivated to cross train, the stationary bike is my least favorite option. I find it incredibly boring and (to be honest) hard. Biking uses completely different muscles, and that seat is less than comfortable. However, since this activity seems to be the thing that irritates my knee the least, I need to suck it up and get friendly with the bike over the next couple of weeks.

4.) Ice and roll

This is what a foam roller looks like…in case you were wondering.

I should’ve been doing this on a regular basis anyway. The foam roller is torture, but it’s a necessary evil. Tight muscles can contribute to runner’s knee, which means that I need to make rolling a part of my regular routine even after I’m healed.

5.) Strengthen

Because weak/poorly conditioned quads and hamstrings can contribute to runner’s knee, there are specific exercises a person can do to help strengthen the muscles around it and alleviate the pain. I’m sure an actual physical therapy program would have me doing more, but for now I am starting with a select few. I’ll see where this gets me after a week or so.

The exercises I’m focusing on include these straight leg raises explained by Runner’s World, specific hamstring and quad stretches, and leg extensions.

6.) Core Work

A strong core is important for all runners. Us injured folks are no exception. Plus, if I can’t run, I might as well focus on getting a six pack, right?

7.) Stop being a baby

This is probably the most important component of my plan. I get that it’s okay to feel sad and have a little pity party for yourself when you’re injured. But I’ve been spending way more time wallowing than should be allowed. My world is not over. I do not fail as a human being. And a little bit of time off from running never killed anyone.

That’s how I’m feeling today anyway. Talk to me in a week and we’ll see how I’m doing then…

Confessions of an Injured Runner

Lauren — Mon, 30 Apr 2012 19:35:08 +0000

You may have noticed that I haven’t really blogged much lately. (And if you haven’t, that’s okay. I know you all have actual lives that involve more than refreshing my blog for a new post). At first it was because things got crazy and I just needed a break to get my life together.

But lately? To be perfectly honest, I’ve sort of been avoiding all things blog-related. Not because I suddenly hate it, but because when you write a running blog and are no longer really able to run, you sort of run out of things to write about (pun most definitely intended).

There’s only so many times you can say: “Yep. My knee still hurts. Nope, I’m not really running,” and lament about the fact that you can feel yourself getting more out of shape by the minute. So instead, I’ve been saving those complaints for EC. And sparing you all the monotony.

But in case any of you were dying for updates, I’ve put together a consolidated list of all the things I’ve been thinking for the past month and a half…but have been a little too ashamed to admit.

Confessions of an Injured Runner

Coming to terms with a running injury is like handling any sort of grief. It’s normal to go through stages as you learn to cope:

Denial: I’m not injured. So what if it hurts to walk. I just tweaked something. Give me a few days and I’ll be as good as new.

Anger: This sucks. I hate my body. Why does it fail me all the time?? What did I do to deserve this?

Bargaining: Look, body, I know that you’re hurting. But I promise if you please just let me run without pain, I will never mistreat you again. Please, just one run without pain. I promise if you do that for me, I will love running every single day of my life. I will never ever complain again.

Depression/Despair: I will never run again for as long as I live. What’s the point of even hoping. My life is over.

Acceptance: Okay, so maybe I need to take a break for a little while. If I rehab and stay smart now, I will be back running soon. Rest now will make me stronger than ever.

What is probably not so normal is the fact that I’ve been cycling back to depression/despair more often than I would like to admit. Every time I come to a place that seems like acceptance, when a few days go by and I’m still in pain, I go right back to feeling as though I’ll never run again. Logically I know I’m being ridiculous. I know that my injury isn’t really all that bad. And that there’s a chance I’m being just a tad over-dramatic. But logic doesn’t always win.

Plus, letting myself wallow in despair gives me an excuse to be lazy. And sometimes, being lazy is much easier than sticking to an awful cross training regimen.

Meanwhile, EC is running more and faster than ever before. I don’t know why he chose the time that I’m sidelined to take running seriously, but it’s secretly driving me nuts. Just the other day, he went out for a 5 mile run and effortlessly kept a 7:25 pace. I don’t know whether to be proud or hate his guts.

I guess I can’t really blame him though. With places like this all around, it’s really hard to not run.

See this trail? I want nothing more than to run up it every single day.

I have been taking the news of other runners’ awesome training and amazing race performances with an odd mixture of excitement and depression. This is the fact that I’m probably the least proud of. And the biggest reason why I’ve cut back on my participation in the blog-world. Even though I am very happy for these people, reading about the success of others further highlights your own failings.

I have not been as good about rehabbing my knee as I’d maybe like you all to believe. I blame it on that whole despair thing. And on the mixed messages I received from the orthopedic doc I saw a few weeks ago. While I’ve been stretching, rolling, and taking anti-inflammatory meds like clockwork, I haven’t been great about icing regularly. Or not running at all.

Back at the end of March, I took a full week off of running and just expected my knee to be magically better (spoiler alert: it wasn’t). But ever since my doctor’s appointment when I was told that I could run every other day and that “running won’t do permanent damage” I ended my self-imposed running ban. If a doctor says I could do it, who am I to argue? Plus, with EC being all into running, it’s hard for me to turn down an offer to tag along.

At this point, I’ve tried everything. I got inserts for my shoes. I hated them. I’ve tried different styles of shoes – everything from more supportive to more minimal. Last week, I had myself convinced that if I wore shoes with a low heel-toe offset, focused on my form, and shortened my stride, my knee problems would go away. And it worked – for a few miles. Without fail, 2 or so miles into my run, the pain always comes back.

At this point, I’ve tried everything – EXCEPT for real, sustained time off. Yes, I took a week off in March, but since then I’ve tried running a couple of times a week. And where has that gotten me? Only a little bit better and infinitely more frustrated.

Because when it comes down to it, I am awful at taking my own advice. I can talk to Ali all day long about the benefits of rest. But have I actually been doing it? When I look back at the past couple of weeks, the truth is I have not. Running less is not the same as not running at all.

While I do think there are some mechanical issues with my stride/form that contribute to the pain, clearly changing how I run isn’t going to make it suddenly go away (though hopefully might help prevent injury in the future). I think it’s about time I come to terms with the fact that the only thing that will is time off. I’m trying hard to move into this whole acceptance phase and stay there. Stay tuned.

During those few moments when I’ve moved on from the feelings of despair, I’ve been scheming. Recent Google searches have included “fast fall marathons” and prices for plane tickets to the western part of the country.

I like the sound of that

But more than my desire to run fast is this overwhelming urge to just RUN. To feel the wind in my hair, the blood pumping in my veins, the feeling of my heart about to beat out of my chest. To once again lose myself in a long run. To know that my legs carried me for miles from town to town. To feel strong. To move without pain. What I wouldn’t give for a run without pain.

My biggest confession as an injured runner? I am not handling things well. Not all the time, anyway. I know that life is good and that my injury is not all that serious. And that (hopefully) in a few month’s time, this will all be a distant memory. Sometimes it’s just hard to see the forest through the trees.

Moving On

Lauren — Thu, 19 Apr 2012 14:50:19 +0000

Thank you all for your wonderful, thoughtful comments on my last post. Missing Boston (again!) this year was tough. Yes, I know the temperature was sweltering and not conducive to a PR. And yes, I saw so many runners in complete misery on Monday. Every marathon is a battle, but Monday’s race seemed to be more of one than usual. However, that didn’t change the fact that when it comes to Marathon Monday, no matter what the conditions are, I’d rather be running.

Still don’t fully grasp how hot is was? This elite pack of women ran with a parasol in an attempt to find a tiny bit of relief from the unrelenting sun.

I kid…

If you ran on Monday – whether you finished or not – congratulations. I ran the last 6 miles with Corey and even that little bit was brutal. I saw so many runners (Corey included) digging deep and leaving all that they had out on that course. I have the utmost respect for anyone that {safely} took on Boston in those conditions. And if you didn’t run due to heat or injury – I respect you all as well. I know the whole deferment policy has gotten a lot of flack from runners across the country, but I think we all need a little reality check. First of all, deferment from Boston isn’t exactly a new thing. In the past, people have been able to defer due to injury. It was only a couple of years ago that Boston stopped allowing deferments due (I expect) to the increased popularity of the race (please correct me if I’m wrong about this). And while I wish that they would allow people to defer because of an injury instead of just instituting a last-minute policy because of the weather, the BAA did what they had to do in the circumstances. Will it make it harder for people to get in next year? Maybe a little (though maybe not, since the number of eligible runners isn’t that high). But the safety of the runners who had already qualified and gotten into the Boston Marathon is much more important than your chances of signing up for the race next year. Sorry.

I know this subject has already been beaten to death, so I will get off my high-horse now. I did not defer from the race, but it wasn’t due to any principles. I simply wasn’t able to get myself to the Boston Expo to pick up my number. At first I was stressed out and disappointed by this (but I paid so much for that stupid shirt!!) but in the end, I realized I needed to truly embrace the spirit of my last post, and move on.

Figuratively and literally.

So this past weekend, instead of getting ready to run Boston, I was a little busy with other things…

Things like packing up all my belongings and moving 3 hours north.

And trying to turn this mess…

…into a livable, functioning kitchen.

That’s right, EC and I have finally made the big move – out of Rhode Island and into the country. Moving to Vermont had been one of those “someday” dreams of ours. We imagined coming up here in 5 years or so, when life was a little more settled and our directions in it seemed a little more clear. But it’s funny how things happen. When we least expected it, everything suddenly came together in a way that allowed us to take a huge leap. A leap that required giving up many of the conveniences we had gotten used to from living in the city (like convenient grocery stores and 5 minute commutes to work), but that has already made me so happy.

My life is still in transition. I’m not living up here full time yet because I’m still working in Rhode Island. This is obviously not an ideal situation, but my job ends in a couple months. I think I can make it work for a little while. Plus, every time I walk outside at our new house and see the mountains all around me makes it all worth it.

I still haven’t been able to run much, but I feel like I am slowly on the road to recovery. Which, to be honest, can’t come soon enough. I have miles of trails and dirt roads to explore.

The Boston Decision

Lauren — Thu, 12 Apr 2012 23:45:01 +0000

For the past several weeks, I have been living in denial about the Boston Marathon. At first, I convinced myself that the pain I was feeling in my knee was just something minor that I would get over within a week. It didn’t matter that it hurt to even walk — all I needed was a few days and I’d be as good as new.

After all, I had big plans for Boston. Plans that included running with some speedy marathoners and chasing down an aggressive PR. And did not include being sidelined due to a stupid injury that came out of nowhere. Even though I’ve been doing this running thing for long enough to know better, a big part of me believed I could will myself to not be truly injured. …because we all know that’s how our bodies work.

But as the pain stuck around and my peak week turned into one week of doing absolutely nothing…and then two…all hopes of a PR went out the window. I let go of that dream and just focused on being able to run again. My sole goal became to finish the race. I figured that as long as I could get myself healthy before Boston, I should be able to handle 26.2, regardless of how slow it ended up being.

Unfortunately, that hasn’t happened. Despite a constant stream of anti-inflmmatory meds coursing through my veins, extra rest, ice and stretching, my stupid knee still isn’t healed. After an unsuccessful run on Monday in which I was both in pain and painfully out of shape, I realized it was time to stop deluding myself.

It was time to admit that I would not be running the Boston Marathon in 2012.

I am not going to pretend that I accepted this gracefully, rationally, and without tears. I know that I’m not the only runner in the history of the world that has needed to drop out of a big race due to injury, nor am I the only one who will be stuck on the sidelines in Boston. I also know that there are other things in life besides Boston and running. And that I have many things to look forward to at the moment.

But there’s something about having a goal that you’ve been working toward for so long taken away from you that erases all rationality. The fact that this is just one bad thing in the midst of a very exciting spring didn’t matter. For awhile, it became all consuming.

Which means that, naturally, I thought a lot about how I would write about my ultimate decision to drop out of the race. At first, I planned to post about how non-runners just don’t understand. How they don’t really grasp that you can put so much of your heart and soul into running. How the fact that “it’s just one race” often has no bearing on how devastating an injury can be. How they don’t realize that it’s not just about the exercise running provides — it’s about my sense of self. It’s about feeling strong, in shape, and confident. And it’s about loving – no, thriving off - the challenge of always striving to be stronger, faster, better.

Many people direct those emotions toward their career. For me, however, it’s always been about my running. It may seem silly, since I will never be fast enough to run professionally…or even on a semi-elite level. I know that I won’t be taking home huge trophies or winning race money anytime soon. But that doesn’t change the fact that running challenges me in a way that nothing else does. So when I can’t do it, well, I’m just not completely myself.

I thought about writing all that in what probably would have come off as a whiny, self-entitled, “woe is me” kind of post. Because even though those things are true, after a little bit of reflection, it became clear that it was me who needed a little bit of perspetive, not those other people.

Injuries suck. There’s no way around that. They are frustrating, depressing, and can make you feel powerless and question yourself as a “real”runner. But — injuries happen. Most runners are forced to deal with injury at some point in their career. Most of the time, this is not the end of the world. You skip a couple of races, lay low for a little while, and then, before you know it, you’re on the road again.

Do I wish I were running Boston? Heck yes (although at this point even running at all sounds amazing). Am I entitled to a little sadness because I’m not? I would say yes again. But do I have the right to mope around, snap at my loved ones and act like my world has ended?

Ummm…no. I have said it in the past and need to remind myself of it now – There is more to marathoning than the Boston Marathon. And there is a whole lot more to life than marathoning.

So on Monday morning, instead of running as far away from Boston as I possibly can, I plan to be back where I was last year — on the sidelines, screaming my lungs out. Allowing myself to be inspired by all the talent around me, and dreaming of one day being back on the course myself. Cursing the world as I push harder, faster, stronger than ever before.

—–

Good luck to everyone running on Monday!! I will be with you in spirit!

An {ontherun} Application: Nuun Hood to Coast 2012

Lauren — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 13:04:46 +0000

Last August, I had the opportunity to be a part of the inaugural Nuun Hood to Coast team. To say it was the experience of a lifetime is an understatement.

Not only have I paraded around race courses in bright pink and green running gear ever since, but I’ve never been better hydrated while doing it. And I’ve spent all year thinking about getting myself back out to the West coast for a chance to do it all over again.

Because it wasn’t just the fact that I love relays above any other race that made it amazing.

Or the fact that this was Hood to Coast – the mother of all relays.

And it wasn’t even the fact that the trip brought me out to beautiful Oregon for the very first time in my life.

Nope. In the end, it was the people. The other bloggers on both teams, the awesome women in my van, and the staff from nuun who took excellent care of us all weekend. These people were what made the relay.

So today, I am applying for another chance. A chance to get back into a smelly van for 24 hours. To run faster and spread the nuun love farther than ever before. To be reunited with some of the amazing women from last year’s team, the employees from my absolute favorite hydration company, and a group of new bloggers who love running, relays, and nuun as much as I do.

I realize it may seem silly to some that I have spent every single day of the last year missing the people I met during the 2011 Hood to Coast relay. But until you’re a part of it, you don’t realize how much one weekend can change you. And how much the people you meet and experiences you have over just a couple of days can impact the rest of your life.

Yes, I know. That’s a lot of sap to swallow first thing on Monday morning. But I just had to get it out of my system. I promise I’m done now.

So without further ado, I present to you,

An {ontherun} Application

If for some reason the embedded video doesn’t work, please click here.

Dear Nuun,

Thank you very much for giving me the opportunity of a lifetime last year. To this day, running Hood to Coast with your company remains one of the most incredible experience of my life. Please bring back Team Watermelon for another weekend of tearing up the Oregon coast.

Love,

LB

Today is the final day to submit your application to be a part of the Nuun Hood to Coast Blogger team for 2012. So get those applications in!! And best of luck to all who applied. I hope to see you on Mt Hood this summer!

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Lauren — Fri, 06 Apr 2012 13:35:24 +0000

Well hello there. It’s been awhile. Almost an entire month of silence. And while a lot has happened, in some ways it seems as though everything has remained the same. Since there’s no real great way to jump into blogging after an extended absence (besides providing you with a list of everything I’ve been doing for the past several weeks – which no one wants to read and I certainly don’t want to write), I now present to you a brief recap in terms of the good, the bad, and the ugly.

The Good

Somewhere during the time I stepped away from Health on the Run, this little blog of mine turned 2! I can’t believe I’ve been writing this site for two whole years already. You’d think I’d know what I’m doing by this point. …or at least have a book deal.

I just got back from a trip to the beach where we celebrated my Mom and the youngest {ontherun} sister’s birthdays. To celebrate the occasion, we baked the most beautiful cake, via a recipe found on Pinterest.

Nailed it!

And you wonder why I’m not a food blogger…

During the time while I was away, my poor fiance packed up my entire apartment and moved out all of my ~~crap~~ valuable possessions on his own. I’m not sure many other people would have been okay with doing that while their significant other lies on a beach. So I think we can safely say that he wins fiance of the year.

More importantly, I am no longer a Rhode Island resident!

If you’ve never lived in RI, you may not understand the significance of this break-away. But for such a tiny state, it has an incredible power of drawing people in and never allowing them to leave. I came to Providence for grad school back in 2007, determined that this would only be a 2 year living situation. 5 years and a couple of jobs later, I’ve finally gotten out. Little Rhodey has a lot of charm and I loved my time living there, but I am ready for some new and exciting changes.

I am now living under the same roof as EC for the very first time in our long history together. I should probably mention that we are also sharing a residence with his parents and younger brother. Not exactly the way I had originally pictured our first go at cohabitation. However – I am incredibly grateful to my future in-laws for their willingness to take myself and my crazy pup in for a little while.

Which brings me to my next, most exciting thing! We found a house! (Not to buy, but who’s counting.) And we love it. It’s in a new state, and will be a HUGE change from our normal lifestyle. But we’re both so incredibly excited about it. More details on this to come soon.

The Bad

Not everything that has happened has been exciting. Unfortunately, the stress and sense of being overwhelmed that I thought would magically disappear once April rolled around has not. (Surprise!) In fact, it’s still here, just as intense as ever.

That being said, I’ve recently just accepted that this level of stress is going to be standard in my life for the next couple of months. I had some awful days/weeks where I acted like a big baby about it all, but no more. From this point forward, I’m resolving to focus on the good, exciting things instead of wallowing in the crap (friends – hold me to this!).

However – that doesn’t mean I’m not incredibly sad to report that recently, running has become pretty much nonexistent in my life. Remember how I was struggling with an arch/ankle injury? Well, due to some pretty stupid training decisions on my part, that little ache is now the least of my problems. I recently developed intense knee pain that has kept me from running for almost 3 weeks now.

Which brings me to….

The Ugly

I may not be running the Boston Marathon.

I can’t even tell you how much it pains me to type that. …and how many emotional breakdowns I’ve had up until this point.

After living in denial about the state of my injury for awhile, I finally got myself into a sports medicine clinic on Tuesday, and the results were not awful…but not terribly encouraging either. After a brief examination and x-ray, he told me what I already knew – I have Patellofemoral Syndrome, aka Runner’s Knee. And at this point, it’s too late to do any sort of physical therapy to get me ready for Boston.

That doesn’t necessarily mean that I can’t run. I am now armed with a heavy dosage of anti-inflammatory drugs and specific instructions to ice, focus on stretching my quads and IT band, and run “when I feel up to it” (whatever that means). Last night, after the first day on my new wonder drugs, I went out for 22 minutes of (almost) pain-free running. It was pure bliss.

But 22 minutes of (almost) pain-free running doesn’t exactly make me marathon ready. I’ll talk more about my injury and what I think led to it in a future post, but for now I’ll just say that the first few days after injuring it, I couldn’t do anything. Even walking or sitting with my knees bent caused major pain. It has gradually gotten better to the point where I could do the elliptical in the gym without hurting it (which apparently, according to the doctor, is bad for my knee. Oops), but over the past 3 weeks, the amount of cardio exercise I’ve done has been minimal.

So, even if by some miracle the pain dissipates enough over the next week so that I can run for longer than 22 minutes without it hurting, there is a much bigger question: At this point, can I even MAKE it to 26.2 miles?

I honestly don’t know. I’m going to give it a few more days before I make up my mind, but either way, it won’t be pretty.

—

For someone who just wrote that she’s resolving to focus on the positive from here on out, I realize that I’m not doing such a great job with this post. But what can I say? I’m a work in progress.

More to come soon! At the very least, I’m happy to be back blogging.

On Stepping Back

Lauren — Thu, 15 Mar 2012 12:38:35 +0000

It’s been a full week since my last post. And in that time, crazy things have been happening in {ontherun} land. I know I have alluded to some big changes that may (or may not) be going down around here. Only time will tell how this will all play out.

But the fact of the matter is that my life is changing – in a big way. Marriage is a big enough thing already. Add to that plans to relocate and a new job…and I might explode from the stress of it all.

Good stress, bad stress. It doesn’t matter. It’s all still stress.

So my lack of posting isn’t from having nothing to say. It’s more from finding the time to say it. Because really, I have lots of things to tell you. Things like…

Last weekend was the complete opposite of my doubleheader race weekend. Instead of running a lot – I ate.

And ate.

And drank.

You have to try out the wines, too, you know.

Last weekend was also one of the best weekends I’ve had all year. Not just because of the fact that I overdosed on great food (including more cheese than I’ve eaten in the past year combined – you don’t go to a state that’s known for cheddar cheese and not eat pounds of it!). But because of the company.

And the location.

Even though I wasn’t thrilled about the fact that there is still snow on the ground…there’s just something about rural Vermont that causes you to instantly relax. I wanted to build myself a cabin along the river and never ever leave.

So there’s been some good stuff happening, but some not-so-great stuff too.

Like the fact that my body seems to be slowly breaking down, one piece at a time. Despite the fact that I’ve taken it easy with the miles and re-introduced cross training into my life. First there was the arch/ankle pain saga, and now knee pain. What’s next? (Don’t answer that, body.)

Or the fact that I seem to have taken on way more than I can realistically accomplish this month. I don’t normally wish there were more hours in a day, but I could use a couple extra these next few weeks.

And last night, when I caught myself sitting on the couch, stress-eating ice cream that I don’t even like (Cherry Garcia? Not your best work, Ben & Jerry’s), I realized that something has got to give.

Which brings me to my main point.

I love blogging. I love having an outlet to share my thoughts, reflect on training, and connect with other people. I love reading the blogs of others – seeing how they train, getting new ideas, becoming inspired. Usually this is all part of stress relief for me. But lately it has just become another stresser. And when I look at my list of all the things I need to get done, right now it’s the only one I can realistically let go of.

So while I’m not planning to disappear forever, I am planning on stepping back a little bit. I’m not really sure what form that is going to take – maybe I’ll feel especially moved and want to jump on my computer to write something again this week. But I’m guessing it might be a little while before you hear from me. Maybe you won’t really notice my absence, and you think the fact that I’m even writing about this is dumb. Well too bad for you, then.

No, in all seriousness – I figured I should update you all on my thoughts. If I can survive this month, I’ll have lots to tell. After all, Boston is only a little over a month (!!!) away. And I will soon be moving. I don’t even want to talk about what I need to accomplish within that time frame.

Until next time my friends…

“What’s the point of being an outlaw if I gotta have responsibilities?”

~ Jesse Pinkman

Thursday Thoughts

Lauren — Fri, 09 Mar 2012 02:10:53 +0000

In no particular order and for no particular reason…

You’re probably tired of hearing me whine about it by now, but my arch/ankle/whatever-the-heck-is-going-on isn’t exactly healed yet. I am still feeling some pain (though not awful) when I run. I know I should suck it up and go to the doctor already, but the thing is – I hate doctors and avoid them at all costs. I blame my parents for this aversion, since zinc and water seemed to be the solution to all ailments in our house [Dad: you don't feel well? You're probably dehydrated!]. I realize it’s probably easy for me to say this since I’ve never been seriously, chronically ill, but I usually just like to tough out the problem on my own instead of forking over a copay for them to say there’s nothing they can do.

I know. Whine, whine, whine. All that to say – I’m not ready to head to the doctor yet, but I am going to take the plunge and buy myself a pair of inserts. I’m thinking Super Feet, but am open to other recommendations.

And then, if things still aren’t better…I’ll go see the doctor.

There are only 3 months until my wedding. THREE. 13 weeks, 93 days, 2,232(ish) hours. Any way you put it, that’s not a whole lot of time. Guess I should start actually planning this thing…

Siri is awesome

It’s also probably time to start on that juice fast. I’ve got to fit into my wedding dress you know!*

*Just kidding, there will be no juice fast. Or any type of fast for that matter…

Speaking of [not] fasting, tomorrow we are headed up to Vermont for our tasting. I can’t remember the last time I was so excited for a meal. I plan to eat more in one night than I could run off in 5 marathons. My stretch pants are already packed.

We will also have some person snapping some nice pictures of us while we’re there. Maybe if I’m feeling especially cheesy, I will share some of the photos with all of you (remember when I was going to blog about wedding planning? Yeah….).

I am both excited for and terrified of Boston. While talking to Dorothy the other day, both of us admitted that we have no idea how to race this beast. I’ve only run Boston one other time. Although I usually tell people what an incredible, inspiring, surreal experience it was, I’m about to tell you all the REAL story.

I went out way too fast (surprise), and by the halfway point my quads were shredded. I mean, completely shredded. What people don’t really talk about is the fact that it’s the downhills on this course that kill you, not the up. After my speed demon start, I pretty much crawled through the later miles. By the time I saw EC around mile 23, I was in so much pain that I pulled him onto the course and made him run alongside of me while I cried. Of course this is where 90% of the professional race photos were taken. I wish I still had them, because we were quite the sight – him in jeans wearing a heavy backpack, and me crumpled over and crying like a baby.

So yeah – clearly I am a pro at racing Boston.

I’m lucky that he still occasionally runs with me for a bit during races. These days I try not to cry…

Stellar form, LB. Stellar form…

The woman who lives above me sings the same song over and over, every single day. LOUDLY. I can hear her as clear as if she were standing in the next room. At first I wanted to laugh about the craziness of it all, but then I got to thinking – if the walls/ceiling are that thin, can she hear the inane, daily conversations that I have with my dog?? You want to talk about crazy…

This month was already going to be busy enough, but now in a twist of events, it looks like I will also be moving. Where to, you ask? Well, that’s the craziest part of all. I have no idea…yet.

I have a total of one free weekend all month. Three guesses as to what I’ll be spending that weekend doing. Have I mentioned that soon I also will not have a job? It’s an exciting time in the life of LB, let me tell ya…

Finally, I currently have this song on repeat. I just can’t get it out of my head.

Gotye – Somebody that I used to Know (ft Kimbra)

Quick note: you may not feel comfortable playing this at work. It’s a really cool video, but there’s a lot of skin. Just throwing that out there…