Hello Kitty Hell

Hello Kitty Rie Miyazawa Broadway

Hello Kitty Hell — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 18:22:16 +0000

This is exactly how my wife thinks all women should dress (seriously) and why she looks forward to Halloween so much. It certainly doesn’t help that she is a huge Rie Miyazawa fan as well which means I have to watch this commercial over and over and over again.

Welcome to a tiny taste of my Hello Kitty Hell…

Sent in by Adora (via tokyomango)

Hello Kitty Beach Balls

Hello Kitty Hell — Tue, 31 Aug 2010 16:28:36 +0000

One would hope that it would be possible to escape the evil feline every now and again, but Hello Kitty always does her best to make sure that isn’t possible. Even a trip to the local beach is wrought with the risk of coming across a 26 foot tall Hello Kitty balloon (with all her character friends as giant beach ball floating in the water) to guarantee that a perfectly good day at the beach will be ruined:

I think the body expression of the two boys upon seeing this says it all…

Sent in by Ray (via nypost)

Hello Kitty Devil Worship

Hello Kitty Hell — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 23:59:18 +0000

Apparently there is a rumor going around that Hello Kitty was created as a result of a pact with the devil. While I would like to claim that this idea was mine (hey, I live in Hello Kitty Hell), it turns out that this episode is far more sinister:

The story is how Hello Kitty came to be…that a mother or father, depending on the version of the story had a child that had cancer. The parent made a pact with the devil that if the child was cured they would create a character in the devil’s honor that would be adored worldwide. There are different variations but they all boil down to the point that Hello Kitty is evil and that God fearing people should stay away from any HK products as they are affiliated with the Devil and Devil worship.

While this is not technically true, it’s hard to dismiss completely since Sanrio likes to use the devil theme on many of their products:

This is how I assume this rumor came to be:

Sanrio was running out of products on which to place the evil feline and decided that one demographic they had not yet converted in large numbers were devil worshippers. Since the goal of Hello Kitty is world domination, the corporate offices made up a story that would appeal to devil worshippers and began sending out the email. The plan has worked brilliantly and you can now count several hundred thousand devil worshippers as ardent Hello Kitty fans. While this may at first appear to be over the top and unbelievable, remember that Sanrio still officially pretends that their shoulder massager is nothing more than a shoulder massager. When you think about, all of a sudden this makes a whole lot more sense. Just saying…

Sent in by Bob

Hello Kitty Peace

Hello Kitty Hell — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 21:10:05 +0000

What does the evil feline do when she has plastered herself on a Keltec pistol? You get the fanatics to make it appear that it is all about peace and love (while you continue to add to your stockpile of Hello Kitty weapons so that you can eventually take over the world)

Sent in by kwikrnu

Hello Kitty Pillow Case

Hello Kitty Hell — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 17:46:32 +0000

Apparently (who could have imagined?) there is someone with even more hostility toward the evil feline than I have:

Sent in by Minnie V.

Hello Kitty Office Cubicle

Hello Kitty Hell — Thu, 26 Aug 2010 22:50:53 +0000

You either had to have done something amazingly horrible in a past life or pissed off your co-workers to no end to deserve to have something like this done to your office cubicle. Either way, it is a good sign that it’s time to find a new job. I think this might even qualify as torture under the Geneva convention.

Sent in by Jose who says, “So a couple of years ago, one of my co-workers brought his lunch that his fiancee had packed in a hello kitty bag because they ran out of regular ones. We (of course) proceeded to mock him mercilessly for a few weeks about it. When he finally got married and went on his honeymoon, this is what we did to his cubicle. It took 5 of us a few hours to do it, and probably even used some pictures from your site.”

Hello Kitty Cthulhu Tattoo

Hello Kitty Hell — Wed, 25 Aug 2010 18:14:57 +0000

H. P. Lovecraft is likely turning in his grave (and stunned that his creation could be made so much more horrific). It is already well known that there should be a law forbidding Hello Kitty tattoo combinations. The Hello Kitty Cthulhu tattoo simply furthers this fact…

Left by Jenna on facebook

Hello Kitty Waffle

Hello Kitty Hell — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 17:01:55 +0000

When you live in Hello Kitty Hell, it is always extremely frightening to actually get up and walk to the table for breakfast. This is because you could very well wake up to something like Hello Kitty waffles which pretty much guarantees massive amounts of traumatic stress the rest of the day:

Sent in by Ida

Hello Kitty Grim Reaper Tattoo

Hello Kitty Hell — Fri, 20 Aug 2010 19:06:37 +0000

It is never a good idea to get a Hello Kitty tattoo, but I guess if you are going to get one, exposing the true side of the evil feline is the way to go. Now you know exactly what you will see when your time is up…

Sent in by christine

Hello Kitty Colt Gun

Hello Kitty Hell — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 22:35:04 +0000

I think it goes without saying that Hello Kitty has never found a gun she didn’t like. With the number of Hello Kitty guns in existence, the question really should be whether there is a gun model that the evil feline hasn’t put her paws around? You can mark the Colt pistol off the list and add it to her ever expanding armory:

Sent in by Ashley