Help a Loser

got and then gave away a job

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Fri, 31 Oct 2008 10:37:00 +0000

I had a job for a week but gave it up due to the fact that I was getting a rid there and person I was getting a rid from complained that the place was to far for them.

of course when I asked if going that far would be OK with them they said it would be fine.

I wish I didn't give up the job no I am back in the same place I was before.

wow I think I may be suffering from depression

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 22:17:00 +0000

I'm usually feeling down. So much that I sometimes don't have the energy to do things that I know I need to do to get me out of this position. and when I do have the energy I realize it's pointless because I will still run into the same blocks that I always run into.

sometimes I feel a bit of anger over being such an f-up.

self identifying my problem of over relying on others part 4 - my dark secret

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 16:12:00 +0000

a level of my over reliance on others that I am a shamed to admit was that years ago I was one of those Internet panhandlers.

I was hoping to raise money to pay for a car and pay off my student loans.

But since I was a hot young woman I didn't make any money. well that's not 100% true I had one kind soul that helped me out (and when I get on my feet I will pay this kind person back)

other then that one person all I got where a lot of insults.

self identifying my problem of over relying on others part 3

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 07:53:00 +0000

crap I just realized that my creating this blog is part of my over relying on others.

the whole reason I made it was that I was hopping to get advice from people I don't know.

Though I admit I have found that just writing down my problems and getting stuff of my chest I have at least start to feel better and allowed myself to se my flaws.

and even though I'm still in the same spot I start out as, I have new insight and have forced myself to fix the problems I've spotted in myself.

at least for the most part, there are things I see, think I fix and later noticed I still do them.

self identifying my problem of over relying on others part 2

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 10:07:00 +0000

another example of my over relying on people would be my plaining on moving to boston.

the reason I picked Boston beside they have a better job market, is the fact that I have a brother that lives there.

and the reason why I haven't moved yet (even though I have the greyhound ticket) is because he has had other things going on.

so yet another thing in my life that I have put in the control of others.

self identifying my problem of over relying on others part 1

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 18:40:00 +0000

a problem that I noticed I have that has been keeping me down is the fact that I have became over reliant on others.

For example I some times get calls/email dealing with job interviews, but becasue I don't have a car (or license) I am relying on others for rides.

But most of the time I can't get anyone to take me and so those are jobs I have passed up.

I've also limit my search to only go as far as I assume someone will take me. which is about a 10 mile radius.

this also has greatly increased the number of jobs open to me that I have passed up.

oK-mart

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Tue, 06 May 2008 21:53:00 +0000

today I thought I had an interview at K-mart, but it turns out if you feel a resume out online they don't tell each stores HR person.

So when I got there I found out that the HR person wasn't there and I'll have to call her next week.

the odd thing is I called last week because I had to reschedule. So if my name wasn't on any records why didn't they say anything then.

But when one door closes another one opens, when I left K-mart I noticed the Tim Hortons across the street was hiring so I filled out an application there.

hard times just get harder

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Sat, 03 May 2008 21:01:00 +0000

well for the last few months I though I was going to move to Boston. Which has a better economy right now then Michigan. And I hoped the move would make it easier for me to find a job.

But those plans didn't fall through.

and because I though I was moving I laxed a bit on the job hunt tip here in MI. But now I am back on the grind to find a 9 to 5.

I was sad about not being able to move but then more bad news hit home, when my mother told she is facing foreclosure.

the good news is I do have an interview Tuesday and maybe another interview coming up soon if I can get in touch with the manager again.

and maybe good news is my mom is close to having the money to pay what she owed the mortgage company (I put in all the money I had left, which was a little over a hundred bucks)

health worry

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Sun, 02 Dec 2007 23:08:00 +0000

Being out work can be horrible when something happens and you need to go see a doctor.

I have recently injured myself but I don’t have any health insurance and no way to pay a doctor.

Now I have to live with pain and worry trying to figure out how to pay to get this looked at.

MAN I WISH AMERICA HAD UNIVERSAL HEALTH INSURANCE!!!

*And those who say I would be a sponge think about it this way, with the money we all save on paying for health insurance we would used to pay for other stuff…this other stuff would kick our economy to a higher level and and this level maybe I will be one of the people employed instead of being an out of work bum.

Now excuse me I going back to looking for a job

loser update

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Sun, 02 Dec 2007 23:05:00 +0000

I know I haven’t been on for a while but that because I haven’t been able to get online as much anymore.

Recently my jobless seemed to have spread to the people around me and everyone I know seems to be struggling a bit, luckily for them they where able to find jobs (either part time or as temps) while I’ve only been lucky enough to get a few interviews but no call backs.

Truth be told the state that I’m living in is in hard times, because of this I have been saving up my money (thank you adsense) and made plans to move by last month. But sadly that did fall through and I’m going to have to push it back to next year (which is only a month away so it not as bad as it sounds)

My loser curse seems to be spreading

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Mon, 13 Aug 2007 20:20:00 +0000

I know I have been posting much (I’m to busy looking for a job) but recently it seems that the people close to me have been losing their jobs left and right.

Which has lifted the stress that I’ve been feeling to get a job has increased to the Nth degree.

One of the things I have found interesting is looking back at how some of us pull together, some of us seem to leech of others while others see to disown everyone else.

I also notice that now that others are having a hard time getting a job they look at me differently, since they are going through it too. Most of those who always treat me like I’m some lazy bum not looking for a job realize the fact that maybe I am telling the truth when I say I spend most of my day looking for a gig.

777

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Sat, 07 Jul 2007 17:42:00 +0000

well there was a lot going on in the news the other day that today is supposed to be lucky, because of all of the 7 in the date. If this is true then I hope some of todays luck rubs off on me.

of course giving that it is 2007 and not just the year 7 I think today would have been lucky two thousand years ago.

of course I guess the year 777 could have been a very lucky year (at least it was for Charlemagne not so much for the saxons I guess) ...and July 7 might have been the most lucky day of that year.

the loser store now open

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Thu, 05 Jul 2007 22:31:00 +0000

I have started a store on spreadshirt to hopefully raise some funds

I don't want to beg for money so I am selling stuff, if you like what you see please buy, if not no biggy you don't have to spend your hard earn cash on it.

I still would like people to give me advice but since I need money to pay for driver ed, bills, and stuff I am also going to use this blog to sell stuff. besides I wasn't really getting as much advice I was hoping for. maybe this will turn out different for me

who's phising for you and who is throwing you to the sharks

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Sat, 23 Jun 2007 00:49:00 +0000

I found this post about monster.com and Careerbuilder very interesting. If you used either of these looking for work you might have ran into your fare share of scammy jobs. I Know I have.

this blogger (Tabatha Marshall) has decided to see if she can get to the bottom of why this is and what are these site doing to stop it.

college loan advice for recent college grads

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Wed, 13 Jun 2007 19:10:00 +0000

Since many college students are facing graduation around this time I think it is prime time I share a bit advice that could be very important to you in the near future.

if you don't already have a job lined up you should not that you have only 2 months to contact any company that you might have taken a loan out from before you are considered default.

So contact them soon or you might not be able to defer you loan.

How do I know I waited much later then 2 months when I tried to defer my loan due to not being employed I was able to because I missed the two month grace period.

return of the loser

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Sat, 09 Jun 2007 00:31:00 +0000

I haven't been on this blog for some time.

still trying to find a job. in fact I had an interview on money and just found out that I didn't get the job. I thought the interview really went well but I guess I was wrong.

sigh

I guess I should just be happy that I finally got an interview...I just don't know what i am doing wrong I send my resume out to as many places as i can but I hardly hear back from anyone.

In the last 5 or so months I have had some changes...I didn't post it but some time ago my car got toed away. it didn't work but it really bugs me sine I had just gotten the cash to get it fixed.

the good news was that I was able to pay off some of my college loans

My resume has been Chucked and I am not worried

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Sat, 13 Jan 2007 23:07:00 +0000

The other day I got an Email that stated I didn't meet the qualifications for a job that I applied for.

now I am sad that I didn't get the job but I liked that this company sent an e-mail telling me I didn't get the job.

I have sent out countless resumes to many companies and never here from them. I usually wait and wonder did they get my resume, have they looked at it yet, when will I hear from them and never ever do I hear any word from them.

I wish more companies would do something like this and send a simple e-mail telling people they didn't get the job. Just a simple stock e-mail sent out the people you reject, it wouldn't take much work, there are plenty of automatic email programs out there that I am sure can make this easy to do.

Doing this will take out the wondering and worry that many people (ok me) do after they fill out job application and it will cut down on people sending in their resume again because they think that the reason they didn't hear back from the company is because they didn't get their application. So that's less paper work a company has to deal with.

in the end I was glad to hear from the company even if it's sad that I can't even get a job at Chuck E. Cheese.

sigh

should I tell em?

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Wed, 10 Jan 2007 12:48:00 +0000

I'm trying to think if I should tell my mother how I feel about things (read last post) or not.

and if so how should I go about it.

What would my kid self say about the me of now?

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Sat, 06 Jan 2007 10:40:00 +0000

I was just thinking how my (and I think most peoples') life isn't what I thought it would be when I was a child.

of course I wanted to be a robot that could turn into a car or a turtle that was a master of ninjutsu. So I can logically understand why that hasn't happen. Plus I am grateful that I don't have to live in a sewer.

But of all the child fantasies that I had of my adult life the one thing that was the common denominator between was that I would have control of my life. Heck that was the common denominator in my dreams when I was a kid, pre-teen and teen.

the sad thing is that I realized that, that hasn't happened. No let me rephrase that I have allowed others to have control of my life.

I sit and wait around for the help of others. Let it be this blog or my family members.

For years I have been trying to get my license. I didn't have the money to pay for drivers ed and asked people in my family (namely my mother) to help me, either to pay for it or teach me themselves.

But I was always turned down. Either due to money or time. And I was/am understand of both. So I said when ever is a good time for you.

I waited and waited

but it was never a good time.

or even worst my mother would say something like "oh, let's do it this Saturday" and when Saturday comes she is now where in site until night and then she turns around and say "it's to late to go practices driving now" or "didn't you know I had this or that meeting."

er no I didn't and if you know you had something to do today why did you say you would practices driving with me

but I let that slide and said ok well when ever it's a good time for you.

and I waited and waited

days past into weeks, months into seasons, seasons into years.

it got so bad that I just gave up asking family for help.

I knew I wasn't going to get it.

and I couldn't take getting hope build up that this time it would be different.

This having no one to turn to when I just need a little help has filled me with frustration and some times rage.

but the thing is that in the end it was always my fault. At some time I should have stood up for myself and taking more control. I should be more aggressive instead of being so mousy.

it's not me, it's my mind that needs to change

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Sat, 30 Dec 2006 22:41:00 +0000

When people keep saying the same thing and it hits home I guess it’s time I take those words into account.

I was talking to my mother the other day about all the anxiety I was feeling around the holidays (which wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be) and all she said was that I need to think positive.

This got me to think about what I wrote earlier about the guitar play with no arms. In the article he said something to the effect that one’s mood can effect one’s life. By being in a good mode you increase you changes of good things happening.

Which brings up something I saw from a movie/documentary “What the Bleep do we know?” that covered ideals about quantum physics that might cross into the spiritual. I’ll talk more about it later (I got a special edition DVD of the film for Christmas), but I will say that one of the ideals in the film is that we change the world around us just by are perspective of it.

This is more then enough for me to see the writing an the wall. I am going to make more an effort to have more of a positive view on things. It’s such a simple concept but is big change to make. I am going to take this one smile at a time and look for ways to become more positive.

xmas not so bad this year

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Thu, 28 Dec 2006 01:56:00 +0000

I've notice over the past few years that I have become over come with a lot of worry and depression before Christmas.

I think it has to do with having to deal with judgmental and nosy family members that come around on this day.

but luckily (for me at least) they didn't bother to much with me as they're attention was focused on other people.

in fact last night I was thinking about the fact that a few years ago I was in such a wreck with the ideal of dealing with them (plus thinking about how crappy my life was) that I was literally in the kitchen with a knife to my wrist.

luckily I came to my senses before I cut myself and asked my self what the hell are you doing.

cold winter nights

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Wed, 13 Dec 2006 20:30:00 +0000

The last few days I have been feeling extremely antsy, and it only gets worst at night.

This has been going on around this time of year for the last few years. I guess I notice that another year past and I am still basically in the same place as I was before.

I want to do something to get out of this mess of a life but I just don’t know what to do. I want a job but with the countless job applications, I fill get no replies expect a few from companies that end up being job scams. I just wish I knew what I am doing wrong it the job hunt area.

I have been trying to get my license for damn near 10 years but I never get any help, in that field. It’s always one thing or another. I don’t know why I keep expecting help. Right now, I thought if I could get the my grandmother’s car fixed I could use that to re learn how to drive (because it’s been a while since I have been behind the wheel) and use the automobile as my own. But the cars tabs needs to be up dated. My mother said she was going to get new tabs…but I feel once again she is jerking me on this, since she always seems to say she would help me and it never happens.

Why do I keep falling for this I don’t know.

This feeling of having to do something quick to improve my life has only gotten worst because for some odd reason I have bad feeling I am going to die next year. I keep getting flashes that my bathroom floor is going to break and I am going to fall throw.

Am I just going crazy, maybe. I hope I don’t die next year my life would be very very unsatisfying

the Internet lotto

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Sat, 25 Nov 2006 01:25:00 +0000

so I finally got someone to reply to the email addres posted to the side.

Did they give me any advice...no.
instead they told me I won the lotto. yeah right, like I am going to fall for that one.

I'm posting the email down below but remember people it is a scam do not reply thinking you will become rich.

I maybe a loser but you Mr. Oliver are an arse for trying to scam people.
===========
Donald Van Oliver Dear Winner,

RE: LOTTO INTERNATIONAL NL PROMOTION PRIZE AWARDS WINNING NOTIFICATION

We are pleased to inform you of the result of the just concluded annual
final draws of Lotto International Netherlands programs. The online
cyberlotto draws was conducted from an exclusive list of 25,000 e-mail
addresses of individual and corporate bodies picked by an advanced
automated random computer search from the internet. No tickets were
sold.After this automated computer ballot, your e-mail address emerged as
one of two winners in the category \"A\" with the following:

Ref Number: PC 607 ES 208
Batch Number: 26371545-LNI/2006
Ticket Number: PCP 002 871

You as well as the other winner are therefore to receive a cash prize
of EUR 1,500,000.00.each from the total payout. Your prize award has
been insured with your e-mail address and will be transferred to you
upon meeting our requirements,statutory, verifications,
and satisfactory report.To begin the claims processing of
your prize winnings you are advised to contact our licensed
claims agent for category \"A\"winners with the information below:

Mr.Donald Van Oliver
E-mail:nlwinnings_claims02@walla.com
phone:+31 616 735 356
Department Director,
Netherlands Lottery International
Amsterdam, The Netherlands

NOTE:All winnings must be claimed not later than 14 days. After this
date all unclaimed funds would be included in the next stake.

Yours faithfully,
Mrs.Agatha DeBoer,
Lotto International Netherlands

What do I have to be thankful for?

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Thu, 23 Nov 2006 20:15:00 +0000

Today is thanksgiving, and here in America it is a time to reflect and think of the things that we are grateful for.

ok that a lie it's a time to eat lots of grub and watch football.

But I want to go back to the original ideal of Thanksgiving when people took the time to refle...er actually the original ideal of thanksgivingers did take the time to think about what they are thankful for because they were to bizzy stealing the Native American's land and food, and later using them for fodder for crappy western movies and mascots for their sports teams.

whatever most people use this day for I want to use this moment to talk about the things that I am grateful for.

I am thankful that all though I don't have a job and still have a roof over my head and food to eat.

I am thankful that I had enough money for my car battery even thought it still wont start. I am thankful that I most likely have enough money to fix the car as soon as I can figure out how to get it to someone that can fix it.

I am thankful that I got the ideal to this blog. Although no one has contacted me with suggest on how I can improve my life yet (which was the original point of doing this) I think writing this stuff down has helped me focus on how I can improve myself.

I am thankful for the fact that I am about to grub down in a few hours.

GETTING FIRED AND THE JOB SEARCH - Ep.15 Healing Comedy

noreply@blogger.com (Zoey) — Tue, 21 Nov 2006 01:28:00 +0000

oh man it seems I have been going about this job search all wrong.

So it seems I should lie on my resume and do drugs and it will be good.

and heck not having to worry about paying my bills will lead to a much less stressful life.