Hestermania!

It's About That Time Again

2012-01-05T14:54:00.003-05:00

It's been far too long since we've made a good announcement here, so how about we let Samantha have a go at it...?

Introducing the new H4, scheduled to roll off the line August, 2012. Comes fully equipped with all the bells and whistles. ;)

5x7 Folded Card

2011-12-14T23:27:00.002-05:00

What Fun Christmas Card

Custom Christmas cards are always available at Shutterfly.com.

View the entire collection of cards.

Shutterfly was kind enough to give me a $10 credit off my next order for posting this link of one of our Christmas cards. Glad to do it! I love Shutterfly and have already spent the credit ;)

More Sillies

2011-11-30T23:19:00.001-05:00

Silly Sam

2011-11-17T16:29:00.001-05:00

"Gospel For Asia" Prayer Collage

2011-11-16T17:37:00.003-05:00

This morning, Ryan let me know how much extra we needed to tithe from some recent Freelance work I had, so the kids and I sat down, looked thru the Gospel For Asia catalog, and each picked a few things to purchase for families in need.

Then we cut out those things from the catalog and Lily very carefully glued them onto a piece of construction paper. She was adamant about how her little chickies should NOT have legs (I think the feet creeped her out for some reason) and then she colored the whoooole paper blue so her chickies could go swimming.

I tried to convince her that maybe the cold girl in the blanket couldn't swim? Or that maybe the lantern wouldn't work if it got wet? Until she informed me all the water was going BEHIND them - silly Mama, what was I thinking!

I think she was very happy with her creation =) Now we can remember what specific items we can pray are put to good use all year long!

(She made sure to tell me she was smiling behind the paper...And I certainly heard the "Cheeeeese!")

"Sam I Am" Finds Her Legs!

2011-10-18T23:29:00.005-04:00

Today she finally did it - Samantha walked across the living room! TWICE! As if she'd been doing it for months while we weren't looking. "What, Mom? This is nothing new." Just last Thursday, I'd seen her take two little steps - one with each foot - so she could grab on to something just beyond her reach. They were her first official non-FALLING steps - actual "I am choosing to propel myself forward" steps.

But today was incredible! A cute little boy named Levi came over with his Mama for a short visit, and he was racing around with her shopping cart, and guess what? She all of a sudden decided to follow after him! WITHOUT HOLDING ON TO ANYTHING. It was incredible. I think I literally shrieked for joy (sorry, Levi's Mama). Might be the first time someone shrieked louder than Sam, the ultimate shrieker.

8 days ago, when she officially turned 17 months and was not yet walking, I told her congratulations, she had done it. She had officially BEATEN Jacob in the race for "Who Can Take the Longest to Start Walking." He took his first steps at 16 months, and started really walking at 17 months. But if she takes off soon, I might call it a tie. GOOD JOB, SAM! (FYI, Lily started walking at 12 months.)

Tonight, she walked like 5 steps between me and our Small Group babysitter Casey maybe four or five times, Ryan catching the action on her last cruise across the carpet. So glad he got to see it, too! I am so stinkin' proud of my chubby, funny cutie pie - you'd think I haven't witnessed this twice before. Yes, all you skeptical new Mamas with just one kid: it is JUST AS EXCITING the 3rd time around.

Hope to catch it on video soon!

PS So I don't forget: Sam made her first attempt at crawling 8 months ago, and has really been crawling consistently/properly for the last 7 months (starting when she was 11 months old). She started cruising around 5 or 6 months ago (when she was 12 or 13 months old).

Not a Morning Person

2011-09-27T09:13:00.000-04:00

Every morning, a little boy wakes up early and climbs into bed next to me. He tries to be still, but he is three and it is not physically possible. He squirms. He fidgets. He can not understand that Mama is not ready to be awake. There are so many more useful things I could be doing between 7am and 8am every morning besides...

Jacob, please lay down
Jacob, stop jumping
Jacob, please stop asking if it's time to go downstairs
Jacob, that is not a whisper
Jacob, please do not drive a train up my arm while I'm sleeping
Jacob, it is never OK to drive a train across my face

I think I need to stop fighting the morning and just get up when he does...

New Bed

2011-09-24T20:33:00.012-04:00

Lily's been sleeping on our old WONDERFUL full size bed since we upgraded to a king this past winter. The idea of a little girl on a big bed like that is just outrageous to me. It seems wrong. So now that our bed is on long-term loan to Aunt Ilse and Uncle David (congrats on your new house!), we got her toddler bed back down from the attic.

You'd have thought it was Christmas. Climbing into it, Lily proclaimed, "I LOVE this bed! I'm going to sleep on it FOREVER!" I held my tongue, realizing how very soon my little baby girl would no longer FIT in that bed...no need to spoil the moment.

Then she exclaimed, "Now I don't have to be scared of the bad lady anymore - I can be happy!" And oh my goodness, now SO CAN I! Lily's been coming out of Jacob's bedroom and begging to sleep in the hallway every night for the past week or two, scared of some mysterious hat-wearing lady she apparently saw in one particular movie that has no scary ladies in it, and given Lily's propensity for extreme honesty, even when lying would greatly improve her situation, I knew she was not making it up. (Plus, her description was super-detailed. And consistent. A stall-tactic would be neither.)

If she indeed has overcome this fear, that will mean no more Jacob screaming, "I want somebody to sleep with me!" whenever she leaves his room, no more Lily roaming the upstairs hall for HOURS, no more Mama telling her no, she still can not come down and watch our movie with us, no more Samantha waking up screaming because Lily's incessant question-calling has disturbed her slumber, and no more Ryan carrying Lily and allllll her sleeping paraphernalia back to bed after she's finally fallen asleep. (Though I have to admit, we both think that last one is super cute.)

It's amazing how one child's sleep patterns can disrupt an entire household - here's to the re-emergence of the toddler bed!

Sam's "15mo" Stats (at 16mos)

2011-09-22T13:55:00.013-04:00

We were a little behind getting Sam to her 15mo pediatrician appointment. She didn't go until the 20th of this month, when she was about 16 1/2mos - oops =) In hindsight, I'm glad we had the extra time. For one, she's THIS CLOSE to walking!

Words:

Na-na (banana - her favorite thing EVER)
Mama
Dadda
Mmm-ma (Oma)
Opa
Bar-bra (our neighbor)
La-la (Lily)
Ba-ba (Jacob)
Buh! Buh! (up! up!)
More
Duh (down, done)
Boo (book)
Bah (ball)
Esh (yes, with lots of head nodding)
Shhh (shoes)
Ch (cheese)
Beh-beh (baby)

She says most of these words without prodding - for instance, if she just SEES a ball, or a baby, or my neighbor Barbara's house. She is constantly asking to get, "Buh! Buh! Buh!" (up). Compared to the other two at this age, it feels like she's talking up a storm. She is doing a great job imitating our words and sounds, something the other two late talkers had a lot of trouble doing at this point. It feels like every day, she's finding new ways to express herself verbally, whether or not what she's actually saying sounds anything like what she means ;) I'm so glad she's trying and progressing!

Does Regularly:

Looks straight at you and shakes her head "no" after doing something she's not supposed to - predicting our response! Strong-willed little troublemaker (RED HEAD). It's getting more obvious (with her temper, strong focus, etc.) which child she will be more like.

(complaining)
Nods head "yes" vigorously (with eyebrows raised high - SO CUTE)
SHRIEKS (I could do with less shrieking. Yes, 3rd child, we hear you.)
Cruises (She's gotten so good, she can walk along next to you holding just one of your fingers.)
Stands alone (She can stand straight up in the middle of the room without anything to hold, and then just stands there for like 10 seconds - she is very proud of herself when she does this one!)
Waves her pointer finger in a circle when the microwave is going or she spots a ceiling fan
LOVES making faces at people / imitating faces

Understands:

head/hair
belly
feet
shoes
mouth
tongue
kick/splash!
stand up
sit down
walk
lay down
arms up
so big!
light
fan
tray

(and a million other things I didn't write down)

(sand does not taste so good)

Samantha is still hysterical. She is one of the funniest little babies ever. She flirts with people. She loves to make faces and imitate expressions/noises (this one keeps her busy with willing strangers in the grocery store)(and the flirting). If I would carry her around on my hip all day, she would be the happiest baby in the world ("Mama! Mama! Buh! Buh!"). She's very social like her brother was, and loves her Mama like no other - though those little arms fly out BEGGING for Opa to pick her up (accompanied with, "Eh! Eh! Eh!") the minute she sees my dad!

She's super smart and purposely PICKS on me - TEASES me. She has great fine motor skills - always trying to take things apart or carefully put them together. She can stack markers together - you know, how the lid from one snaps into the bottom of another. She doesn't quite have Lily's incredible concentration and perseverance, but she certainly doesn't just give up like the other guy! There is much shrieking (did I mention the shrieking?) involved if she can't accomplish her task or if she needs help - Jacob still just walks away and looks for something else to do. "Oh, well. Lalalala...SQUIRREL!" When you stop the car and walk over to her seat, she puts her hands on her buckles and makes noises like she's trying to get them open - or like she's telling us that's what comes next. Today, she strapped her booster seat shut all by herself - just kept working on it, furrowing her brow, until she got it. She may be on the later end of walking, as was Jacob, but that little brain of hers is rushing on ahead!

16mo stats:
24lb 15oz (ALMOST 25lb) - 71st %
31" tall - 51st %
47cm head circumference - 72nd %

Vaccines:
Hep A & Prevnar
*(no desire to get into the vaccine debate - we are somewhere in the middle ourselves - just posting this for my own reference!)*

Compare with Jacob's 15mo stats
The comprehensive stat tracker

Lily's Pre-K Teacher

2011-09-06T14:51:00.004-04:00

For a little while now, Lily has had some fear towards talking to men or older boys, especially those she’s never met (but certainly including those she’s known forever). One of her reasons for not responding when they talk to her is, “I don’t know them!” even if it’s completely not true. We’ve never pushed her to talk to anyone she didn’t want to, even if it seemed completely unreasonable to US or a little embarrassing. I’m sure the day will come all too soon when we WISH she still wasn’t talking to boys!

Well, about a week or two ago, I finally told her that her teacher for this year was named Mr. Scott. She didn’t comment until a few days later when out of the blue she said, “I don’t want a man to be my teacher. I’m not gonna talk to him.” We’ve had a few discussions about it since then. Then last night, after everyone was thoroughly scrubbed and tucked in and – we thought – asleep, Lily comes downstairs and we hear her little voice call out, “I don’t want to go to school tomorrow because my teacher is a boy and I don’t want to talk to him.”

You can imagine how my heart went out to her, picturing her laying in bed worrying about the next day. So I sat next to her on the steps and reassured her that no one was going to make her talk to anyone, including her teacher, until she was ready. I told her she could just say, “I’m shy” but then she made me promise I would say that for her, because duh silly mom, that would involve TALKING to him.

So this morning we get to school and Mr. Scott is busy trying to contain and calm this little boy who is SCREAMING HYSTERICALLY when we walk into Lily’s classroom. Not the most encouraging first glimpse into her first day. The little boy ended up running OUT of the room somehow and Mr. Scott darted after him – all this happened in like the first 10 seconds after we walked in – so there we stood, just us and the other little kids and Lily’s assistant teacher, a wonderful NON-BOY named Miss Sylvia.

Lily loved her immediately.

Later, when Mr. Scott walked back in – leaving said screaming boy to spend a couple more minutes screaming with his parents, instead – I told Lily’s teachers about her particular hesitation, as I promised Lily, and they both agreed they wanted Lily to open up on her own terms, when she was ready. Mr. Scott even took a step AWAY from Lily after saying hi and watching her recoil, which I found particularly encouraging. He didn’t just SAY he understood, he understood.

In the car later after picking up the kids, I asked them how their days went. After all the non-specific answers (“I didn’t cry,” from Jacob, “There were lots of ponies,” from Lily), I started asking more detailed questions. Did you eat all your lunch? What did they give you for snack time? Who did you sit next to? Did you go potty? Were there a lot of kids in your class? And then, slipped in at the end there, Did you talk to Mr. Scott?

Without missing a beat, Lily piped right up: “Yes, I got to know him!”

I couldn’t have hoped for a better answer. She got to know him! It was so sweet and so funny and such a RELIEF, I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing. She went on to tell me that she talked to him a lot – and to Miss Sylvia and all the kids in her class and at lunch. This was way more than I could have hoped for, and I am so encouraged that she is making progress on her own time, as she’s ready. I hope the next day she goes back to school, she remembers that she “got to know him” and doesn’t pull back into her shell. Even though I know this must have been hard for her, I’m so glad she had this learning experience and overcame her fear in the end.

1st Day of Pre-K and Preschool

2011-09-06T10:16:00.010-04:00

Today, Jacob and Lily started Preschool and Pre-K, respectively.

Look how big they are!

Ready to go, despite the rain.

Jacob was all, "See ya, Ma!" the moment he saw toy trucks. He plopped right down next to this other little boy, and said, "Hi, I'm Jacob. What's your name?" Have I ever mentioned that he is the sweetest little boy EVER.?

(First day of school means 4 pigtails for Lily!)

Lily was a bit more tentative b/c she knew her teacher was a man, and she's at a stage where she is a bit reluctant to speak to males in general. I told her she didn't have to say anything to him until she was ready ("But I'll NEVER be ready!"), and that she could only talk to her female assistant teacher for now if she wanted to. That did the trick and she settled right in. Hooray for Miss Sylvia!

Related:
1st day of school this past February. Jacob looks so much older now!

Happy Very Belated 4th of July

2011-07-26T16:55:00.004-04:00

Our little(er) family two years ago:

My Buddies

2011-07-23T09:23:00.000-04:00

Uh...Hello?

2011-07-22T09:11:00.000-04:00

PS And speaking of kids on cell phones, I still say this is the BEST VIDEO EVER.

My Girls of Summer

2011-07-21T08:37:00.001-04:00

And all this lake loving comes at the best price possible:

High Flying

2011-07-20T10:00:00.005-04:00

Before:

After:

Before:

After:

Before:

After:

Just after...

Snuggle Time with Ryan

2011-07-19T05:38:00.000-04:00

Looks like the kiddos think Daddy's extra cuddly when he's not feeling well...

Sleepy Lily

2011-07-18T12:47:00.011-04:00

Lily has slept Jacob's room every night since last October when she got a door slammed in her face and landed in the ER for another round of liquid stitches. She went from having night terrors almost every night (sometimes more than once per night) to having none since the night she started sleeping with Jacob.

NONE.

I couldn't believe the immediate difference. I know it's said there's no real reason for night terrors, but it looks like Lily had them because she was lonely. And a little unsettled. It's amazing what another kid in the same room did for her sleep. Not to mention how excited Jacob was to get a sleeping buddy! Boy does he babble on and on and on ("Jacob, stop talking! I'm tired!").

Now, one of our favorite parts of the day is listening to them talk, sing, scheme, and yes even argue as they're winding down together in his room. Lily still sometimes needs to roam the halls before falling asleep, but it's usually only after Jacob's passed out. And she's his messenger: "Jacob has to go potty really bad" (even though we know she added "really bad" just to bolster his request), "Jacob wants another kiss," etc.

Anyway, I thought about the night terrors last week when she had a fever for a few days, and had a night terror three nights in a row until the fever had passed. Boy do I NOT miss those! They always seemed to happen riiiight after I'd fallen asleep. And after being so used to sleeping through the night again (thank you wonderful sleeping children!!!"), I was super groggy and grouchy getting to her room.

I found what comforted her the most was saying her name as I tried to soothe her, and repeatedly telling her I loved her - it seemed to calm her breathing and lessen her hysterical wailing at least a bit. When it was over, she simply laid down again and went back to sleep, like nothing ever happened. In the morning, she would look at me like I had two heads when I'd ask her why she woke up screaming the night before. "But I slept so good last night!"

Here's an article on night terrors in case your kid has never had one...just imagine the quiet of your dark house being interrupted by a sudden, horrible SCREAMING that just goes on and on. At least it's not because anyone is hurt!

Track Back:
Lily's 1st Night Terror (a.k.a. How NOT to overreact the 1st time it happens to your kid.)
1st Time Trying to Sleep Jacob and Lily in Same Room
Lily's 1st ER Trip for Liquid Stitches

Some Missing Jacob Stats

2011-06-27T12:49:00.006-04:00

So I just found another little piece of paper floating around with Jacob's 15-mo stats:

22lb 11oz (24th%)
31" (50th%)

Also, these notes:
- Not walking
- Not talking
- Needs Thal Minor re-test*
- Look at eczema

Words:
- Mama
- Oma
- truck
- Lily
- Daddy
- banana

Signs:
- no
- yes
- all done
- drink
- more
- up
- beep beep beep
- light
- he also claps and does "SO BIG!"

Understands:
- stand up
- sit down
- lay down
- walk
- tray
- bib
- light/fan

It's nice to have these to look at as Samantha approaches this milestone. She's 13 1/2 mo now and doing/understanding most of these - not to mention that she's already surpassed his weight. Chubbers.

Hooray for another little piece of paper getting thrown out!

*The Thalassemia Minor misdiagnosis story will have to wait for another time...

So I Can Throw Out This Little Sticky...

2011-06-22T16:49:00.015-04:00

...And so I don't forget.

Jacob's 3-Year Stats:

31-lb 7oz (48th percent)
38" tall (66th% - and don't "they" say you double a boy's height at 3 to get his adult height? That's 6'3" - an inch taller than his Daddy! And almost a whole head taller than his Mama - OY!)
Goes through spurts where he eats everything in sight for weeks, then seemingly lives on AIR and WATER for weeks.
He turned 3 and BAM! It's like someone flipped a switch and the terrible 2s that never arrived are now the terrible 3s. Not super terrible compared to what they COULD be, just compared to his former happy, sweet, content, silly self. I guess it's not many moms that wish for their 2-year-old's temperament back - haha ;) Overall, he's still great. I could just do with less whining and complaining and "I can't DOOOO it!" *falls down on the ground because limbs suddenly stop working* At least his kicking-the-crap-out-of-people phase only lasted a week or two (sorry, Lily, Wyatt, and Hayden). Here's hoping THAT one doesn't return.
Potty trained within a week or two starting the week of his third birthday. Going #2 on the potty (instead of in his pull-up at nap time or bed time) took a little more convincing (maybe a month? two months?), but he only ever pooped in his undies twice (Hi, Aunt Ilse! So glad he did it for you while I was away both times!), and that was in his crib during nap time when he really wasn't ready to not have a pull-up on and I guess you never know that until you try, right? But now he's doing great and never has accidents (if you don't count the times he MISSES the potty and somehow sprays himself) and still uses a pull-up during naps and a nighttime diaper at night (though sometimes we get several uses out of them because if he's still awake, he'll call us to get him out of his tent and take him to the potty), and I'm sorry I complained about him turning 3. Because this no diaper-ness ROCKS. (Now if only Sam would learn...slacker). Speaking of which...

Sam's 1-Year Stats:

23-lb (78th percent)
28.5" (29th percent - put this together with her weight and you get LITTLE CHUBS!)
46cm head circumference (74th percent)
Still in size 4 diapers
Still sleeps all night (7:30pm-7:30pm praise the LORD!)
Stopped nursing at 11 months (very sad - Mama, not Sam)
Eating EVERYTHING but nuts and shellfish. Starting to get picky now at 13 months - and by "picky" I mean she finally has preferences and finally stops eating when full. So "picky" compared to EATS EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME i.e. her former self, not picky compared to ACTUAL PICKY.
Hair still red and going strong - woohoo!
Pulled to a stand for the first time two weeks ago in her crib, and I was blessed to watch this little miracle in progress. First to her knees, then (with much screaming out in frustration) to her chubby little feet. Then MUCH BOUNCING WITH PRIDE. (Her, not me.)(OK, maybe I bounced a little.) Able to cruise along the edge of the couch or in the kiddie pool, but VERY SLOWLY. Will let go with both hands to play with something on the raised surface so long as her belly is leaning against it.
Still primarily army-crawling, but CAPABLE of crawling. She frequently gets on her hands and knees (she learned a few weeks ago this is how she can get back to sitting after army-crawling - another little victory!), and just this morning I saw her crawl properly about 5 feet before she gave up and army-crawled the rest of the way. ("Moooom, it's just so much QUICKER.")
Still super happy and silly and loves to make her brother and sister laugh by blowing raspberries, pausing to wait for them to crack up, then doing it again.

OK, so all this wasn't on the sticky. Just the stats. But if I don't write this stuff down now, I will forget! It's bad enough that Sam has all her milestones (mostly what food she first had on what date) recorded on the recycling calendar...poor third child.

Compare Stats
Lily's 4yr and Sam's 9mo Stats
Sam's 6mo Stats
Sam's Birth thru 3mo Stats
Lily's 2yr Stats
Jake's 6mo Stats
Jake's 2wk Stats & 1 wk stats
Lily's 15mo & 9mo Stats

(OK, so the online stat tracking has been a little sporadic all around...Who thinks I should get it all from the pediatrician and create a graph comparing all three of them? Yeah, I'll get around to that as soon as I add pictures to this post. Haha.)

Spoke Too Soon

2011-06-01T15:12:00.008-04:00

Yesterday, Jacob had another seizure.

It was exactly one year and two days since the first two. He woke up crabby (NOT NORMAL), and was hot to the touch but had no fever. Strange. So I sent him to school, where he remained hot and crabby but still had no fever. Strange. Eventually they called me a second time and said he just wouldn't stop crying (NOT NORMAL), and I said I'd come and get him. I brought him home and he immediately fell asleep on the couch. He woke up screaming and couldn't be consoled...probably didn't help that I took his temperature again. This time, it was 101.2 - first fever of the day. We gave him Tylenol, and not 10 minutes later, I heard a shout from the couch.

The second I heard that sound, I knew what was happening. My heart sank, and I ran to the living room. I saw his body stiffen, his head back, his body shake. He shouted/gasped out loud once more before I got to him. I told my mom in the kitchen she had to leave the house - she happened to be here for his first seizure a year ago, and it was too much for her, so I knew I could not have her nearby. She willingly ran out of the house, and I scooped my little boy off the couch and laid him flat on the floor.

Within a moment, my dad was there, asking what he could do. I told him to call 9-11, but when he scrambled to find a phone, I pulled mine out of my pocket and dialed 9-11 myself. I told my dad (still looking for a job) to go look at the time - to the second - and to not forget what it said. I stroked Jacob's hair, prayed out loud so he could hear, whispered to him, stroked his hair some more. I turned his head to the side and looked in his mouth to make sure his tongue was where it belonged. I didn't like the color of his face or his lips, but though his breathing was erratic and in gulps, I knew he was still breathing as he should.

When the 9-11 operator asked me his location, I said, "On the floor at home." Haha, like she knew where that was. I told her his actual location, told her this was not his first seizure, and kept her abreast of everything that was happening. At one point, I called to my dad (keeping an eye on the time out of the room) that his seizure had ended, once the jerking stopped, but then I realized that wasn't true - his breathing was still not normal, his face was still the wrong color, his body was still not his own. He foamed at the mouth, and finally a few seconds later, he limped to the side. It was over.

The 9-11 operator asked me how long it lasted, and I said, "Less than a minute?" My dad called from the kitchen that it was closer to two. I continued stroking his hair, whispering in his ear, calmly answering the 9-11 operator's questions. I told her he was breathing normally and was in the regular post-seizure sleep. She said that paramedics would be there any minute and to call back if I needed anything else. It was the first time a 9-11 operator had ever hung up before the paramedics had arrived.

I told my dad to open the front door so we were ready. I pulled off Jacob's damp underwear and covered his bottom half with a blanket for some dignity. His top half was still burning up.

The paramedics walked in and I actually recognized one or two of them from their two visits last year (once for Lily, once for Jacob). They sat on the couch and looked down at Jacob, curled on his side on the floor. We chit-chatted about their seemingly frequent visits, about how everything looked as it should. Though his breathing was good, they turned on an oxygen tank and placed the mask near his face. Good thing - he would have freaked out if he woke up and found that thing strapped to him, after the asthma diagnosis and nebulizer treatment at the pediatrician's a couple weeks ago (whole other story). I had my dad get an ice pack from the freezer and they put it on the back of his neck or on his back directly to help cool him down. He seemed to respond to the cold, though he still wasn't actually "awake".

He eventually came out of it, and became aware of his surroundings again. I'm not sure how long he was out - 10 minutes? His eyes opened and he started sobbing and although I kept telling him how exciting it was that the police man and the "ambulance guys" came to visit, he did not find it exciting in the least. He cried and cried, and I put his head in my lap - stroked his hair some more. He freaked out when Lily kept trying to give him a sippy cup of water to drink.

The paramedics asked me which hospital I wanted to take him to. "I'm not taking him to the hospital," I shook my head matter-of-factly. "I'll call his pediatrician and we'll take him there if they need us to." No one argued. No one suggested otherwise. They all nodded like that was what their opinion, too. It's funny how different things are after they've happened once or twice. You have authority. You have clarity. You have peace.

That's what really struck me through this whole situation: I was super calm. I took action. Even though it had been a year since I last had to deal with this, I instinctively knew what to do, and that everything was OK. I didn't hesitate. I stayed focused. I called out orders without please or thank-you and made no apologies. There could be no other explanation than the Lord was with me, holding my hand as I held on to my little boy.

(Back to sleep on the couch, after the paramedics left.)

Jacob: One Year Seizure-Free

2011-05-30T13:36:00.009-04:00

Yesterday marked one year since Jacob's two seizures.

(above, saying "cheeeeeeese"...)

Here's to another year (and a lifetime!) seizure-free, silly boy!

Related:
Jacob's Seizure
EMT and ER Photos

Sam's 1st Birthday Cake

2011-05-12T12:07:00.000-04:00

Years from now, when Samantha's complaining about being the 3rd child and not getting any of the special things the 1st or 2nd child got, let it be known that her Mama made her A Cake. A pink cake. With strawberry icing (same as Lily's 2nd birthday cake) and loooots of strawberries.

To match Sam's hair, of course.

Eying up the cake.

Excited to take a bite.

Mmmmm.......

I can't be sure, but I think she liked it ;)

To Samantha on her First Birthday

2011-05-12T10:09:00.000-04:00

My Sam-I-Am:

Yesterday, you turned 1.
ONE.

I am still having trouble wrapping my brain around that. Because wasn't it just last week that you were born? Such a strange thing, aging... It keeps happening to my babies no matter how much I tell it to SLOW DOWN. Not listening.

So it's 12:17 a.m. and I'm sitting here at my desk staring at the cutest picture ever:

I think if you looked up "cuteness" in the dictionary, you would see that picture. Or "sweetness." Or "makes people happy." Because my little girl, you are all of those things. No matter what kind of day I'm having, no matter how much Thing 1 and Thing 2 are running me ragged - toddlers! much energy! - you're there smiling at me. A quiet moment of SWEET and love and CHUBBY and I really have a hard time not squeezing you and showering you with kisses and smooshes ALL DAY.

That's a lot of capital letters and I mean EVERY ONE OF THEM.

I can not tell you everything you've brought to our lives. You are funny without trying to be. You make us laugh all the time. You love doing your pretend "heh-heh-heh" laugh after other people laugh, like you want to be in on the joke - which just makes everyone laugh all the more - because normally you're pretty quiet and I don't think anyone expects you to contribute.

You are subtle, and gentle, and curious, and your whole face lights up when you smile. You kick-kick-kick and sometimes even shriek when your Daddy walks in the door every day after work, because you can not contain your excitement at seeing him. You love your sister Lily to pieces and believe me when I tell you I can see the feeling is mutual. You are still trying to figure out your brother Jacob, because he can be a little unpredictable, but just this afternoon when you army-crawled your way into his room, he was so excited to see you, he shouted, "Mantha's in my room!" and ran over to lay on his belly next to you - smiles all around.

And what gets me the most is how much you love me. You are 100% content in Mama's arms and could stay there all day if they had nothing else do to (gotta love that Ergo!). And let me tell you, your love for me is overwhelming. It is beautiful. It is the sweetest thing I could ever, ever want. And believe me when I tell you, little girl, that it is absolutely 100% mutual.

I love our time together two mornings a week when Lily and Jacob are at preschool. We go grocery shopping, we hang out at home, we visit people. Everywhere we go, you are happy. You smile at people. You do your tiny little beauty queen wave. You make every elderly lady at Shop-Rite SOOO happy to see you. I would take you anywhere, because you are an absolute joy to have around all the time. And the more my babies stop being babies, the more I appreciate you just the way you are, right now, Booger Face.

All My Love,
Mama

Sam's First Birthday Party

2011-05-07T17:33:00.005-04:00

1st cupcake...1st taste of chocolate...

I think the face says it all!