Hicks Family Blog

Faith in Hard Times

2010-03-16T12:19:00.004-06:00

If I had to pick celebrity heroes I'm pretty sure Jim Bob & Michelle Duggar would be on the list. In the unlikely case you haven't heard of them before they recently had their ninteenth child 15 weeks early - both mom and baby's health were in extreme danger. They are featured on a regular reality show by TLC.

Oddly, my reasoning for naming them "celebrity heroes" would have little to do with the number of children they have, or even our shared belief that conception is God's business - not ours. Instead, it has to do with their faith and their willingness to trust God completely with every situation in their lives. Their book goes into greater detail about this, but suffice it to say - they have chosen to place their lives in God's hands and he in turn has blessed them more then they can imagine.

One of the questions I think everyone struggles with regardless of their position on God is "Why do bad things happen to good people?" Even those of us who know and understand God's truth in the Bible still wrestle with this question. I just learned that a girl who we went to church with and that my wife and mother helped mentor during her teen years was brutally murdered a day ago. Despite having a horrific childhood, she had become a very loving and caring person - why, of anyone, did she have to die? I'm sure those closest to her now are struggling dearly with this question as I write this.

When we are faced with hard times, pain, evil, death, or sorrow it is the hardest time to stand by our faith and remember that God is in control. Back to the Duggars - watch this recent video clip from their show (sorry couldn't find a version to embed here). Pay particular attention as Jim Bob addresses the camera crew during the midst of their crisis (starts around 40 seconds in). Did you catch it?: "...we praise God when all the good things are happening, and we praise God even through this difficult situation". Faced with the possible death of his wife and unborn child, Jim Bob's faith in his Father is unwavering. It mirror's Job's response to hard times from the Bible.

God promises that even during the midst of tragedy and strife he is with us (Joshua 1:9). He even takes those troubles and shapes them into something good (Romans 8:28, Genesis 45:4-6). What a privilege that we can rely on Him. There's great freedom in the faith to trust God even through our hardest times. The situation may not be under our control - but that's OK, because it's under the control of someone far more powerful than ourselves.

Understanding a Conservative Christian - Introduction

2010-03-09T12:11:00.006-07:00

An Exposition for Atheists, Progressives, and other Interested Parties

This is the introduction to (what I hope to be) a series of posts explaining my beliefs (and the beliefs of other like-minded persons) on various issues for the purpose of granting a better understanding to persons who hold to a different set of beliefs than my own. It is my desire that these posts both inform and foster open discussion on these issues.

A few notes before we begin:

* I am not a professional author. While I will rough-edit these posts and will attempt to logically convey my positions and beliefs on various issues I will likely bungle the wording at points or not clearly communicate that which I wish to say. My apologies in advance. While I will endeavor to be comprehensive in a discussion of a topic, I will not be leaving "no stone unturned". If there is an issue you feel I did not adequately address, or a gap in my reasoning, leave a comment and let me know - I'll attempt to clarify.

* If I could summarize this series in one word it would be "Why?". Specifically to those who hold different beliefs than my own, the actions and positions I take on specific issues may seem puzzling, illogical, or downright insane. My effort here is to try and expose the "Why?" behind what I say and do - to give readers a better glimpse into my thoughts and behaviors (and the thoughts and behaviors of those who hold similar beliefs). In a similar fashion, I hope this series gives me the chance to learn some of the "Why?" behind your beliefs. If you disagree with my position on an issue, or have something to add, please post a comment and let me know your thoughts. Hey, you can even tell me how wrong I am and why.

* I live in the United States. These posts will address themes and topics that are relevant to American culture today. I realize some readers of these articles may not reside in the US, and I may not have a clear understanding of the cultural issues relevant to where you live. However, international readers are still more than welcome to join in the discussion - and if things differ greatly where you are at, let me know! I'd like to learn more.

* The title of this series is "Understanding a Conservative Christian". While my beliefs are in many ways similar to others among the US political "right" and evangelical Christian circles I in no way intend to speak for the group as a whole. I have arrived at my viewpoints independently and in some ways these viewpoints differ from the expected norms. Please understand that the viewpoints we discuss should be taken on an issue by issue basis, and not compiled collectively to represent anyone's belief system other than my own.

* As I said previously, my goals are to inform about my viewpoints, discuss various positions on issues, and learn more about the "Why?" behind the viewpoints of others. However, I need to be clear up front that a secondary objective of this series is to persuade. You see, I believe my viewpoints on these issues to be the correct one - just as I'm sure you believe your viewpoint to be correct (in truth we all do - nobody holds to beliefs that they believe to be incorrect except for the point of argument). It is not my intent to ram my beliefs down your throat, but (as a result of my worldview - see more below) I do hope that by exposing the reasoning behind my viewpoints you (the reader) might better understand the basis for those beliefs and be persuaded to believe the same. Of course, I am certainly not infallible - and I am open to correcting my viewpoints as well should you sufficiently convince me otherwise.

Worldview

Before we can launch into covering relevant topics I believe it is necessary to spend a few moments discussing Worldview. I googled the term worldview to find a good definition. These struck me as good ones:

One's personal view of the world and how one interprets it; The totality of one's beliefs about reality; A general philosophy or view of life

A set of commonly held values, ideas, and images concerning the nature of reality and the role of humanity within it.

largely unconscious but generally coherent set of beliefs about how the world operates; at the level of day-to-day practice, approximately synonymous with paradigm

The Wikipedia article on Worldview has a more detailed description. Here's a quote (which in turn appears to be a summary from Apostel):

According to Apostel, a worldview is an ontology, or a descriptive model of the world. It should comprise these six elements:
1. An explanation of the world
2. A futurology, answering the question "where are we heading?"
3. Values, answers to ethical questions: "What should we do?"
4. A praxeology, or methodology, or theory of action.: "How should we attain our goals?"
5. An epistemology, or theory of knowledge. "What is true and false?"
6. An etiology. A constructed world-view should contain an account of its own "building blocks," its origins and construction.

Our worldview is our set of core beliefs - the lens through which we view the world. It shapes our thoughts, actions, and behaviors. Understanding worldview is KEY to understanding how I (or anyone else for that matter) think, and why my viewpoints are what they are.

There are two* pre-dominant worldviews in America today. The first is the Secular Humanist worldview. This worldview is defined predominantly by its belief in the human being as supremely important and the primary authority over itself. God is unimportant to this worldview, therefore adherents tend to be atheists. From Wikipedia's definition:

Secular humanism is a humanist philosophy that espouses reason, ethics, and justice, and specifically rejects supernatural and religious dogma as the basis of morality and decision-making. Like other types of humanism, secular humanism is a life stance that focuses on the way human beings can lead good, happy and functional lives.

The second predominant worldview in America is the Biblical worldview. This worldview is based on the Bible (hence its name). It holds God as supreme over humans, His creation. It rejects the human being's importance, other than that which is acquired from being made in the image of the creator God. It too is a life stance focusing on how human beings can lead good, happy, and functional lives by fulfilling their created purpose of serving their Creator.

While these two viewpoints represent the extremes of ideological thinking in America the belief systems of most Americans falls somewhere between the two. My personal belief system is close to the second - and I attempt to refine it on a regular basis to bring it even closer.

Because our worldviews shape our thinking, our viewpoints on various issues will reflect the beliefs that comprise our worldview. You will notice that the "Why?" behind my various positions will be directly based upon the beliefs of my worldview. When viewed through the lens of my worldview, you will see the logic I have used to arrive at the viewpoint I hold - even if that viewpoint seems illogical from the perspective of a different worldview.

Moving Forward

My tentative plan is to write a new post in this series every few weeks. The first will likely be "Origins", since this is both a topic of debate in America as well as the defining factor that shapes the two worldviews listed above. I welcome your comments and look forward to the discussions we'll have.

* A third Islamic worldview (based upon the teachings of Muhammed and the Qur'an) appears to be rapidly growing in popularity among western nations. There are of course many other minority worldviews as well.

Eden's Second Birthday

2010-03-02T15:08:00.004-07:00

From 100301

Eden turned two this Sunday/Monday (we joked that he really doesn't get a birthday again until 2012 because he's a leap-day baby). We had Nana, Wiggy, and Uncle John over. Crystal made brownies & ice cream into a mountain cake with trucks driving on it (see right). More pics below.

A Sam's Club birthday party

2010-02-24T15:54:00.002-07:00

This last Sunday was Wiggy's (my Dad's) birthday. Our family tradition is usually to go out for a nice dinner together on birthdays. Of course, now that there's quite a few of us, dinners out at nice restaurants can start to get pricey. At some point during the meal my Dad will comment "We should have all just gone to Sam's club and got a hot dog for a $1.00!"

So, this Sunday we threw a surprise birthday party for him at Sam's Club. We laid out a tablecloth, a banner, and gave the kids noisemakers. And then we all enjoyed (choked down) a hot dog together in his honor. Best part? All ten of us ate for $17.00 :)

From 100221

Why We Live Debt Free

2010-02-19T15:45:00.003-07:00

Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law - Romans 13:8 (KJV*)

Let me start with where we were: It's January 2006 - and we're in serious financial trouble. Both Crystal and I are working full time (opposite hours so we don't have to put the kids in daycare). We just got out from under a double house payment (we moved before selling our trailer in Grand Junction so we had to pay on both houses until it finally sold over half a year later). We have well over $15k in credit card debt, plus a variety of other debts. We have very little equity in our new home (less than $10k). Our cash situation is dismal: I'm constantly signing up for new credit cards (to help pay the interest on the old ones), frequently getting cash advances on my paycheck, and hitting up my parents for money on a regular basis.

That's where we were when we decided things had to change. We cut up our credit cards and threw them away. We virtually stopped all discretionary spending. We agreed not to borrow another dime. I then called Money Management International and set up a debt repayment plan. They negotiated on our behalf for lower interest rates on our credit cards and we began the lengthy process of paying them back.

Things got worse. Even with reduced rates on our cards we were still drowning under the interest. It was more than we could pay. We began to fall behind on the bills. Our mortgage went into foreclosure and suddenly we had an additional $3k in legal fees to repay. It didn't look to good. A number of (divine) circumstances occurred and thankfully we were brought back from the brink. But it wasn't an easy time.

Last spring (March of 2009) I made the final payment on our credit card debt. Today, we live debt free. Instead of credit card debt we have savings in the bank. We have no mortgage, our home was bought with cash. I'm not writing this to brag (because we have nothing to brag about**), but only to state that it is possible to live debt free - even with 6 hungry kids to feed!

So, why did we choose to quit borrowing? Here were our reasons:

1. We were slaves to our poor choices. Our whole lives revolved around how to stay afloat. It consumed large amounts of our time and energy, and led to a lot of conflict between us. Being debt free has granted considerable peace to our family.

2. We were unable to give. We couldn't help anyone around us that needed something, nor could we contribute to charitable causes. Thankfully now a large portion of our income can go to helping others.

3. We didn't want to rely on the government. The few times we were forced to rely on government services (primarily medicaid insurance) because of how poorly we handled our money we felt as if we were stealing from the taxpayers who had worked hard for that income. Since we're opposed to government social programs it was hypocritical for us to continue using them.

4. We needed to do right by our children. While I certainly don't advocate that you must first have your finances straight before you have kids, I do believe it's important to get your finances straight in order to provide for your children. During the same time-period God was changing our beliefs on having kids, and we realized that if our family was going to be larger than 2 or 3 children we needed to use our money differently.

Being debt free has radically changed our lives for the better. Yes, it can be tough at times: we aren't able to always rush out and buy whatever we want. We have to save for our purchases in advance - and most of what we buy is used (within reason - groceries and diapers are two things we don't get second hand, lol). But we have tremendous freedom to give, and we don't have to rely on any bank, government agency, or person to make it through.

We recently started taking Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University course to find even more ways we can save and improve our spending. If you are buried in debt I highly recommend this taking this course, it is well worth the cost.

Footnotes:

*I quoted the King James Version above because most people recognize this verse in that version.

** God alone gets the credit for this. While we have attempted to live frugally we certainly wouldn't be near as far along were it not for a few divine circumstances that radically changed things for us in the intervening years. We also owe a debt of gratitude to my parents for their financial counsel during this time.

My Unified Social Media Flowchart

2010-02-16T22:09:00.006-07:00

So...I've made some changes to how I connect with people online. Below I present my "Unified Social Media Flowchart" (click to view fullsize):

Now everything is nicely unified and works together. Essentially (in case the above looks confusing) if you want to keep up with everything that's going on with me you can friend me on Facebook or follow me via Google Buzz in Gmail. You can also subscribe to this blog or my Twitter feed to get most everything.

While I've intended to do this for some time, I've hesitated a bit due to the diversity of my online social circles. My younger progressive hi-tech friends are now confronted with the fact that I am a politically conservative, pro-child, homeschool advocate who takes seriously his relationship with Jesus. Worse perhaps*, my devout Christian friends are confronted with my belief that alcohol is OK if consumed in moderation, and the fact that I run a website where I play Dungeons & Dragons. Ah well, now (despite who you are) you now know how big of a bigot/heathen/hypocrite (pick your favorite) I am**.

Are you up to speed on social media? I'd love to see your flowchart. If you don't have one made up I suggest using Lucid Chart, the one above only took me about 15 minutes. Post a comment with a link to your flowchart once you have it done. I may expand/modify mine over the coming weeks (I just realized I forgot to include instant messaging).

Footnotes:
* Honestly, I expect to lose more face among Christians with this post than with non-Christians, and I'm not sure that speaks well of us as a group.

** I guess we really do have a lot in common (grin) .... just kidding!

EDIT: Updated the flowchart to include instant messaging, and link recommendations. I'm still not certain it is complete yet.

Quick & Dirty Redesign

2010-02-16T20:03:00.002-07:00

Blogger.com is shutting down FTP posting, so I migrated my blog to their servers. I took the opportunity to do a quick re-design of the site using a basic blogger template and some handy gadgets. For 5 mins of work it doesn't look bad. I'll probably re-visit the design to add some personal touches in the not-to-distant future.

Corkboard Walls

2010-02-06T19:41:00.003-07:00

We have a refrigerator and a full size freezer next to each other in our kitchen, and like most parents our kids cover them in their artwork, hung with magnets just strong enough to fall off every time we open the fridge. We were wearing thin with picking up the magnets and artwork every time we went to pull out the milk.

We bought several rolls of cork at Hobby Lobby this last week, and today I pulled out the highly-toxic adhesive and plastered them to the walls in the hall (inhaling a few too many fumes in the process). Now the kids have plenty of space to hang their artwork right outside the doors to their rooms - and it doesn't have to be on the fridge.

Carcassonne

2010-02-04T10:12:00.003-07:00

Crystal and I played a game of Carcassonne
with the kids (Purity, Charis & Emery) last night. I saw this played at our New Year's Party, so when the local game store was going out of business and had it on sale I grabbed a copy. The kids really enjoyed it...Emery particularly had a great time matching up the tiles to make the cities and roads (though it was a bit of a challenge to keep him from knocking around the rest of the tiles in the process of placing his current one). Overall, we had some fun family time together - it's worth trying it if you haven't played it before. Good strategy while still being simple enough for smaller children to play.

Getting Up - Week 2

2010-02-01T14:26:00.002-07:00

So, we're on our second week of rising at 6AM - and its getting slightly easier. We'd both find it to be far easier if Nahum would sleep though the night :) but so far that's not happening.

We have really enjoyed our exercise / prayer time and our family worship time at 7AM (when we get the kids up) is going much better than when we were doing it in the evenings. We did decide to take the weekend off, sleeping in on Saturday (well, as much as is possible) and rising a little later on Sundays. I'm not sure I'm entirely ready to part with lazy Saturday mornings yet.

Actually, this Saturday I did get up a little earlier than usual. I told Emery that when he got up he could come wake me up and we would go on an "adventure", just him and Dad. Our adventure turned out to be a trip to Wendy's and the hardware store, and then a walk back from the ranch after we got the van stuck in the snow - but it was good to have some quality time together "just us guys".

Update - and getting up!

2010-01-26T09:35:00.004-07:00

From 091218

So, I've been bad about ignoring this blog for some time. We had our sixth child and third boy, Nahum Joseph Hicks ("Nacho" or "Mr. Stretchypants" for short), on October 13th, 2009. We also made considerable progress on our homeschooling, saw Aunt Kate off to college, had a family vacation to Denver over Thanksgiving, a great Christmas, a fun New Year's party. There are many other things I should have posted about but haven't. Moving on...

Crystal and I have felt convicted for a while now about getting up in the mornings. Neither of us are "morning people"*, and especially after you've dealt with a fussy baby all night long it's hard to roll out of bed in the morning. However, we could see the necessity of getting an early start to the day for several reasons:

We need time to pray together and discuss God's word apart from the kids.

we need time to discuss our plan for the day

we both wanted time to exercise and keep in shape

we wanted a time when we could consistently do family worship with the kids

we wanted to get the kids started on chores and school before 11AM

While we were trying to do some of those things in the evenings, there were often too many interruptions. Even when there wasn't something else going on we often were too tired and worn-out by the end of the day to stay motivated enough to get it all done.

We've agreed several times to start getting up at 6AM before the kids, but it was always too easy to shut off the alarm or hit the snooze, but in the end we realized the toll this was taking on our family. So yesterday, for the first time, we both got up when the alarm went off. I know this may seem insignificant to you morning people out there (you know who you are...), but it was really difficult for us. We prayed together while we exercised, and then woke up the kids and had family worship together. What a great start to the day.

To be honest, the rest of the day was miserable. We were grouchy. The kids were grouchy. They doddled through their chores, they fought with each other, they weren't obedient, they barely got any schoolwork done, which made us even more grouchy. But, in the end, we're still glad we did it.

We got up at 6AM today again too. It was a little bit easier (not much, mind you), and so far things have gone a little bit better. I'm hoping this pattern continues...

It really is refreshing to get a good start to the day. While we're both rather exhausted, being able to spend time focusing on God (both as a couple and together with the kids) first thing in the morning really will change things. I'm looking forward to it (all but the getting up part).

* Emery, unlike his parents, is a morning person. Regardless of what time he goes to bed he rises early to greet the new day and cheerfully (and loudly) lets anyone who is sleeping know that it's time to be up!

The Duggars: 20 and Counting / Do Hard Things

2009-06-29T14:01:00.003-06:00

Getting back to my book reviews. I finished up two this week.

First, Crystal and I read The Duggars: 20 and Counting, authored by Jim-Bob & Michelle Duggar (whom you've probably seen on TV). Since they have 18 children we hoped to glean some tips and tricks for managing a large family. While the book contained plenty of this sort of advice in the end that wasn't what drew my attention. The underlying theme of the book (and the Duggar family) is trusting God to direct every decision you make. The Duggars go into detail about their past and the decisions which they made both with and apart from God's guidance - and the results that followed. It is evident that God has richly blessed their family both financially and fertily (is that a word?) for seeking his will. Even if you don't have a bunch of kids this book is well worth the read simply to see God at work in their lives.

Second, I read Do Hard Things by Alex & Brett Harris. This book is written by teenagers for teenagers, but it speaks a number of truths that I found quite relevant as an adult. The Harris twins challenge teens to step beyond the world's low expectations of them and truly do something extraordinary. Scattered thoughout the book are dozens of examples of teens who put down the game controller and TV remote and made something of their life - prior to turning 21. Even for me at age 28 this book served as a real challenge to move beyond what is expected and tackle what is truly challenging. Beyond the message of the book I appreciated that the authors included a chapter on practical steps of acting on what you learned (again with examples). So many books will try to sell an idea but in the end leave the reader with no direction for how to achieve that idea. I wish I would have read Do Hard Things as a teen - I'm suspect the challenge within may have motivated me to waste far less time during that period of my life. This is going to be mandatory reading for my kids once they're a bit older.

2009 Christian Family Conference

2009-06-24T14:41:00.002-06:00

We recently returned from the 2009 Christian Family Conference in Denver, sponsored by Christian Home Educators of Colorado (CHEC). The conference served as encouragement a chance for Crystal and I to re-focus on our commitment to develop in our children a passion to follow Jesus in every aspect of their life. As a parent, I can not see any other goal that is more critical to us at this stage in life.

To be honest, I'm finding it to be a big challenge. I realize the only way we can instill those values in our children is if they first see them modeled in us...and that just isn't as easy as it sounds. I recently had to face up to this firsthand when Crystal brought to my attention that I was allowing addiction to my computer to frequently usurp my quality time with her and the kids. I was resistant to give it up, but agreed to leave my computer at work over the weekend and instead focus on my task as a dad and husband. In hindsight, I'm really glad I did - but believe me it wasn't easy at the time.

The conference trip also doubled as our anniversary getaway. Mom and Kate kept the kids, except for Emery who wen't with Grandpa "Wiggy" to California to work on airplanes (both their favorite!). It was nice to have some quality time to spend together without the kids....we don't get it very often. Our friends Brian & Jenny Jarrett were able to escape for four days too, and we had an enjoyable time discussing what we were learning at the conference over meals with them. Brian will be blogging about some of his observations on their family blog if you're interested in taking a look.

I'm hoping to do some more blogging here myself over the course of the next few months. Things have been far to bare around here for a while.

Long Time, No Post...

2009-03-18T14:19:00.002-06:00

Sorry for my lack of updates recently. During the month of February a lot of my spare time was consumed rehersing for a performance of Guys & Dolls, and therefore I didn't have much time to spare to update this blog. On the upside, I was able to work with a lot of great people among the cast, and I'm looking forward to being able to work with Upstage Shows again sometime in the future.

I hope to have some new content (more than just links) posted here soon, so stay tuned via the ATOM feed if you're interested.

Welcome Caedmon Jarrett

2009-01-29T08:55:00.002-07:00

Congratulations to our friends Brian and Jenny Jarrett who got a new addition to their family this week!

Great Video

2009-01-22T09:04:00.001-07:00

This sure puts an interesting perspective on things:

Call to Dunkirk

2009-01-19T15:06:00.000-07:00

Homeschooling goes boom in America

2009-01-06T08:55:00.001-07:00

Homeschooling goes boom in America

Faith Equals Fertility?

2008-12-17T13:12:00.001-07:00

Faith Equals Fertility?

The Second Reformation

2008-12-05T07:55:00.003-07:00

I just finished reading The Second Reformation by William A. Beckham. This is an older book that has been sitting on my shelf for a number of years (since the late 90s when we first started doing cell/simple church). It primarily focuses on the practical mechanics of what the author terms the "Two-Winged Church". One that includes both corporate large-gathering worship and smaller cell units.

The book appears to be aimed toward leadership staff of traditional churches who are attempting to transition their churches into cell groups. As a result there was much of it I didn't find to be applicable to our situation here in Parachute. However the author does discuss the requirements for founding a cell/house church based upon Christ's model: An initiating set of 2-3 people, a core group of 12 people, a critical mass of 120, and from there a fulfillment of vision including thousands.

Aloha Purity

2008-11-21T13:31:00.002-07:00

Purity is on her way back tomorrow from a two-week trip with Wiggy, Nana, and Aunt Kate to Hawaii and Santa Barbara. Here she is standing in front of the USS Bowfin at the Pearl Harbor Memorial.

The Greatest Mission Trip You'll Ever Take: Resource Friday - The Pineapple Story

2008-11-11T09:04:00.001-07:00

The Greatest Mission Trip You'll Ever Take: Resource Friday - The Pineapple Story.

Follow the above link and read about then listen to the Pineapple Story. The author is very entertaining and there is a really great message behind it all.

How Not to Raise a Pagan

2008-11-08T20:59:00.001-07:00

How Not to Raise a Pagan by Albert Mohler. Take a listen!

Is good ol' Abe rolling over in his grave?

2008-11-05T08:26:00.001-07:00

"I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crises. The great point is to bring them the real facts." - Abraham Lincoln

Interesting Quote

2008-10-31T16:41:00.002-06:00

"When an opponent declares, 'I will not come over to your side,' I calmly say, 'Your child belongs to us already… What are you? You will pass on. Your descendants, however, now stand in the new camp. In a short time they will know nothing else but this new community.'" - Adolph Hitler