Four Salem city councillors and the Mayor were desperate to get a We want a Third Bridge! vote -- since a main purpose of spending $600-800 million on a new bridge is to improve traffic flow from/to West Salem.

But... strikeout. Third whiff.

The No Third Bridge folks report this was the third time the West Salem Neighorhood Association has declined to support the project.

Supporters sure gave it a "good" (in a certain sense) try, though.

After an 18 to 18 tie vote, City Councilors and the Mayor watched silently as Councilor Clem added his name to the list of eligible voters. At that same time a school age student was declared eligible to vote and cast the deciding vote that killed the motion.

It is fitting that the voter who decided the issue was the youngest person in the room and has the most at stake.

At least a handful of those attending and voting against the motion were a direct result of the door-to-door campaign in the area of the River Valley Subdivision that was organized by NO 3rd Bridge supporter Fritz Ulrich. NO 3rd Bridge supporter Les Margosian was already out the door when a voice vote was called and came back into the meeting to vote. Another example that every vote counts.

Do you find it more than a little slimy that Councilor Clem joined the vote of the West Salem neighbors when the purpose of the vote was to advise the City Council (including Councilor Clem) when they deliberate next Monday night? We'd love to hear your comments about that.

"What is the single most important reason Salem needs a Third Bridge? And please support your reason with some facts."

About a month ago I asked Peter Fernandez, Salem's Public Works director, the same question at a forum featuring him and No Third Bridge leader Scott Bassett. I blogged about Fernandez' answer. 

I asked for the single most important reason. Numero Uno. #1. The words most likely to make opponents of a Third Bridge think, "whoa, maybe we really do need this thing!"

So how did Fernandez respond?

By saying that the single most important reason is that there is only one way into and out of West Salem. Redundancy and safety were the top reasons a Third Bridge is needed. He said that the bridges are seismically unfit. Currently serious accidents on the bridge tie up traffic for long distances into neighborhoods on both sides of the river.

Though I wasn't wowed by the answer -- there are much cheaper ways to insure redundancy and safety than spending $600-800 million on a new bridge -- I appreciated Peter Fernandez' forthright answer. 

It's tough to have a respectful, focused, meaningful debate about whether Salem needs a Third Bridge, and if so, what sort of bridge, when the opposing sides talk at each other, rather than with each other. 

(West Salem Neighborhood Association chair Kenji Sugahara is quoted as saying this; I entirely agree, Kenji.)

So I thought it would be helpful to learn what the City Councillors and Mayor consider to be the One Best Reason for another bridge across the Willamette. I've heard from four people: councillors Chuck Bennett, Laura Tesler, Diana Dickey, and Dan Clem. 

Here's their unedited responses. Bennett and Tesler shared a response.

Councillors Chuck Bennett and Laura Tesler:

The decision facing the council is not to build a third bridge. It is to plan for one if it is needed in the future. Council votes now are to determine its location and general scope. The most recent council discussion has been to turn down a major highway and bridge from I-5 to Highway 22 through Highland Neighborhood and along the west side of the Willamette River.

The council alternative, based on public hearings and neighborhood meetings, is that if a bridge is ever approved by voters and built, it should be a much smaller connector between the two sides of the river using existing surface streets and without raised viaducts an[d] a minimal ramp system on the west side. It also must serve cars, buses, pedestrians and bicyclists.

Councillor Diana Dickey:

Salem needs to consider a third bridge to plan for the future --for current and future transportation demand needs for vehicles and alternative modes including more efficient mass transit service, to relieve current and future traffic congestion, and for safety to provide an additional connection between the east and west sides of Salem.

Councillor Dan Clem:

Need another connection between West Salem and Salem.  1/6th of the City's population is dependent on accessing the rest of the City at one geographical spot. Throughout Salem, there are alternative routes for driving when congestion or an emergency occur. But not for West Salem: there are no alternative routes to or from West Salem. The Union Street Pedestrian/Bike bridge can only be used by smaller emergency vehicles, i.e., a Fire Ladder Truck (none exist in West Salem, only 1 Fire Station) is too big to be able to use this bridge.  

The existing Marion and Center Street bridges and our downtown grid-street system handle as much traffic volumes in today (2010 - 83,816 average daily count) than is found on Interstate 5 (69,500 - 91,000) Salem interchanges.  As reported in the Statesman Journal, Salem has one of the highest vehicle delay statistics in Oregon, with the potential of achieving over 650 vehicle-delay hours for pm peak by 2031 for the 31 intersections in the Central Business, North Salem, and West Salem districts. The existing bridges may not be usable if a medium-impact seismic event occurs. West Salem has grown and will continue to grow by approximately 1,000 people per year for the next 18 years.  

Thanks to the four of you for sharing these reasons. You went beyond One Best Reason, but, hey, I'd rather have several reasons than none at all. Hopefully the other four councillors and the Mayor will respond soon.

I'm not in favor of building a Third Bridge. The opponents have better arguments, in my opinion. However, I'm open to changing my mind. What bothers me the most about how this project has been managed and publicized is this:

Most people in Salem are barely aware that a week from now, the City Council will vote on what apparently is the largest public works project in Salem's history.

I wish there had been more news coverage in the Statesman Journal, and several well-promoted debates where people could ask questions of the bridge's proponents and opponents. I'm much better-informed about this project than most; yet I have lots of unanswered questions.

Like...

How much would it cost to earthquake-proof the two existing bridges? I've been told that this could be done at a much lower cost than building a new Third Bridge. Since safety and redundancy are key concerns, why not focus on making those bridges more seismically sound? 

And if traffic congestion is another central concern, why not improve the ability of the current bridges to handle what seems to be a stable traffic load? (Meaning, it isn't increasing much, if at all.)

I'm also concerned that the new-fangled "Salem Alternative" design, which is less freeway'ish than the bigger and badder 4-D and other designs, isn't recognized as what it is: an option that could be changed in the future.

Nothing, so far as I know, prevents the Salem City Council from re-voting a year or two from now on what sort of Third Bridge to build. Giant elevated onramps and offramps could be resurrected in the next phase of project planning, should the Council vote in favor of moving ahead on June 24. 

One thing seems virtually certain: Salem will be debating the Third Bridge issue for a long time to come. As noted before, the debate needs to be much more in the public eye than it has been so far.

Transparency is good -- both for windows and for political decisions.

Those greedy meanies need to be stopped. (Both meters and the city officials who want them.) There's no good reason for installing meters. 

If you're a registered voter who lives in Salem or West Salem, sign the Stop Parking Meters Downtown initiative petition. 

Already almost fifty downtown businesses have signature sheets. Here's where you can sign.

ABC Music
Academy of Hair Design
Arbuckle Costic Architects
Art & Antiques Plus
Art Department
Avalon Salon
Bike Peddler
Bittersweet Boutique
Book Bin
Bridal Gallery
Carl’s Cuisine
Cascade Baking Co
Casey’s Cafe
Clydes Lock & Safe
Cooke Stationery
Cosmos Deja Vu Salon
Court Appearance Salon
Create a Memory
Crendo Photography
Crystal Power and Light Co
Engleberg Antiks
Footwear Express
French Uincorn
Grand Ballroom
Great Harvest Baking Co
Green Thumb Florists
Johnny Matthews Salon
Le Motive
Lullu’s Tutto Cucina
Ma Valise
Nopps Star Exchange
Normandy Guitar
NW Comic Gallery
One Fair World
Oregon Tattoo
Red Raven Gallery
Saffron’s Plumbing
Salem Summit
Scotts Cycle
Simply Grand Bridal
Studio 554 Salon
Technical Artistry Salon
Tom’s Trophy
Venti’s Cafe
Willamette Valley Music

Yet it has belatedly dawned on me that my not-so-good dad deserves a lot of thanks -- because without him I'd only be half of what I am.

And who is to say which half of me is better than the rest? I'm one big heap of Brian, no dividing possible.

I've told my story of my barely there relationship with my father. The title of that post, "One hour with my father," sums it up. 

In my entire life, I spent one hour with my father. But even that was too long. Like I said at the end of the post:

When the door shut behind me and I started walking down the corridor to my rented car, I was so happy. Not happy that I had finally gotten to meet my father—happy that I would never have to see my father again.

Which I never did.

That hour has shrunk over the thirty years or so since I met my father for that one and only time.

Now I can remember only a few seconds of that hour.

Knocking on the hotel room door. Seeing him standing there, my also never-met half brother standing behind him. Shaking his hand. Sitting down on the edge of a bed to thumb through the General Electric manuals he wanted me to see, evidence of his work life. Shaking his hand at the end of the hour. Hearing the hotel door shut. Feeling so fucking relieved that the hour was over.

So my entire face-to-face conscious connection with my father consists of, oh, about 30 seconds of memories. Not much. Yet half a minute more than lots of people have who never saw their father at all.

Which included my father. His mother died giving birth to him. His father immediately took off. They were German-speaking immigrants from Poland. Welcome to America, Baby John HInes! (He was adopted by the Hines family.)

I haven't had many positive thoughts about my father, for good reason.

But this years pre-Father's Day goings-on stimulated some fresh insights into my relationship with him. Which, I'm now aware, is a lot more intimate than I used to think. After all, half of my genetic makeup came from my father. 

Difference is, I can look at my phenotypic behavior/characteristics and easily connect who I am today with memories of my mother. For example, I write notes in the back of books almost exactly like my mother did. 

I didn't start doing this consciously, to imitate her. Only after many years of note-making did I realize, "Holy crap! I'm acting just like my mother." That creeped me out. Worse, it made me realize that there must be many other ways I'm a lot like my mother, yet am unaware of.

From my mother, considerably older half-sister, and those few moments with my father I have some understanding of what kind of a guy my father was. In short, an asshole. Not 100%. Who is? But by and large, he was an egotistical, self-centered, macho, controlling jerk.

Knowing this, for a long time I worried that this genetic 50% of me would come out one day more strongly than it already has. Like an alien monster growing in my psyche, I'd wake up and find that I'd turned into my father.

Nightmare!

Now, though, I realize that I am my father. Like I am my mother. Like I am every one of my ancestors, extending all the way back to the primal single-celled bacteria every living thing on Earth is related to. 

I can't recognize very well my father in me, but he is there.

And I'm deeply grateful for that. I wish I could have told him that during the one hour I spent with him. I wish I could have told him lots of things during that never-again time that neither he nor I treated anywhere near as preciously as we should have.

My father was an asshole. However, he was an asshole who got things done. By all accounts he was brilliant, talented, energetic.

For example, he proudly told me how, as an efficiency engineer, he'd go into General Electric manufacturing plants and "kick ass" until the staff there improved the way they did things. Well, I've had a similar procliviity for activism. I see something that seems wrong, and my inner reformer goes into overdrive.

My mother didn't have that same energy. She was highly political, but not highly politically involved. So I've got to give my father genetic credit for qualities that I value in myself. Like him, I can be an asshole. 

But I've come to feel that my asshole-ness flows from much the same source my father's did. I never knew my father from my outside. I'm learning to know him from the inside, though, from characteristics of mine that must come from him.

So thank you, dad. I never got to say those words to you while you were alive. I also never said "I love you." Until now, I never thought those would been honest words.

However, like you I'm so damn egotistical I love myself a lot, so since you're half of me, ergo...

I love you.

The Salem Statesman Journal has editorialized in favor of proceeding with a $600-800 million Third Bridge across the Willamette River. It has published several news stories about this unwanted, unneeded, and unpaid-for debacle.

Yet... the newpaper has never, not once, not ever, talked with leaders of the No Third Bridge citizen group. Read all about it in today's No Third Bridge Facebook post. 

SALEM BLOGGER CALLS THE THE EDITOR OF THE STATESMAN JOURNAL TO TASK FOR POOR COVERAGE OF THE 3RD BRIDGE

Salem blogger and Salem Weekly columnist Brian Hines is right in his open letter to S-J editor Michael Davis. Our "newspaper of record's" coverage of the 3rd bridge issue has been poor. There have been just a handful of articles about it. The leaders of the opposition have never been interviewed. Not once. 

Maybe Hines' post will get some attention and we will get some investigative coverage between now and the City Council meeting on June 24th. But don't hold your breath.

I'm not. There's a good chance the supposed "paper of record" for our area will stay silent on reasons to oppose what seems to be the most expensive public works project in Salem history.

If this bothers you, tell the SJ executive editor, Michael Davis, how you feel:

mailto:mdavis4@statesmanjournal.com

This is one reason why traditional newspapers are dying: they aren't practicing genuine journalism any more. 

Thanks for the shout-out, No Third Bridge guys. I just wish the Statesman Journal would get off its butt and start covering this story like it should be. Like I said in a comment on the Facebook post:

Glancing at the front page of the Statesman Journal today, I saw the banner headline was "College-funding budgets headed for vote." 

OK, that's a rather important statewide issue. 

But come on, S-J dudes... isn't it even more important to inform Salem residents about an upcoming (June 24) vote on a $600-800 million Third Bridge?

Especially since you have never, not once, talked with the lead opponents of this unneeded, unwanted, and unpaid-for boondoggle?

Michael, in my self-appointed position as Statesman Journal Gadfly I've urged you to give more coverage to those opposiing the $600-800 milliion Third Bridge that City of Salem officials are determined to foist upon the citizenry. 

To me, as to many others, this bridge is unneeded, unwanted, and unpaid for. It's an almost-billion dollar solution in search of a problem. The No Third Bridge folks have made this clear.

Yet here we are, ten days from the July 24 City Council meeting which will be the last chance for people to testify on this issue. Afterwards, a vote will happen -- which could commit Salem to going forward with what seems to be the largest public works project in the city's history.

Where is the Statesman Journal's indepth coverage? Where is the investigative reporting that analyzes how accurately and fairly proponents and opponents of the Third Bridge are making their cases? Where are the clearly presented facts which will help citizens decide whether this is a good use of their taxes?

I realize that times have changed in the newspaper industry. Statesman Journal staff have been laid off. The paper isn't printed locally any more. Readers have a lot of online news choices now. Classified advertising is under pressure from the Internet.

Still...

I heard you say at a City Club meeting that the Statesman Journal remains the "paper of record" for this area. Absolutely true. Bloggers like me or our alternative Salem Weekly paper (I'm a columnist there now!) never could fill that role. 

So this is why i'm hoping you'll go all-out on covering the Third Bridge debate between now and the June 24 City Council meeting. This is a really important issue for the Salem area. Really important. 

Yet your paper's editorial endorsement of going forward with this ill-considered project was made without talking with the well-informed Third Bridge opponents. And news coverage has been shallow, sometimes being little more than a regurgitation of City of Salem talking points.

Readers of the Statesman Journal deserve better. Long-time readers like me remember when your newspaper really dug into land use issues. This wasn't that long ago. 

Like, 2007.

That was pretty much the mid-point of my neighborhood's fight against a 217 acre subdivision on farmland that threatened our ground and surface water: wells and a nearby lake. As a leader of this fight, for several years I regularly communicated with a reporter, Beth Casper, who no longer is with the Statesman Journal (but is with Salem Is).

Beth did an excellent job reporting on the Laack subdivision, a.k.a. Ridge View Estates. She stuck with the story through many twists and turns. Beth was balanced and fair. I'd tell her about our side of the subdivision fight, then she'd talk with the would-be developers and learn how they saw the situation.

Back then the Statesman Journal was a much better "paper of record." By the time we got to a Circuit Court appeal filing, I'd accumulated quite a few stories by Beth. Some of these were used in our legal case as evidence.

Facts do matter. There's a place for "he said, she said" sorts of newspaper stories, but I'm much fonder of analytic in-depth reporting where factual reality is revealed as much as possible. 

This is what I miss in the Statesman Journal, circa 2013.

I used to feel that Salem's daily was fair and balanced (ouch... it hurts to use a Fox News phrase). I rarely thought that your newspaper had a decided tilt to the right or left, toward the 1% or 99%, in the direction of the City establishment or us "commoners."

Now, though, there's a lot of doubt that the Statesman Journal is really a mainstream media outlet. Both the editorial and news streams seem to lean in a conservative, rightward, Chamber of Commerce, Republican'y direction.

You'd probably disagree. Your fellow editors probably would disagree. I'm sure you guys see yourselves as relatively unbiased providers of news and opinion. 

Well...

If that's the case, let's see as much attention given to opponents of the Third Bridge as proponents. Let's see as many complaints about your coverage coming from City leaders as from people at odds with Mayoral and Council proposals. Let's see as much investigative reporting of government institutions led by conservatives (Marion County, City of Salem) as of the Willamette ESD or the Public Employees Retirement System.

I want to be able to trust the Statesman Journal again. I want to get back to the days when I didn't open the paper and think so often, "Geez, why aren't they covering ____?", and "Geez, not another story about _____."

Don't let Salem's leaders get away with putting the citizenry on the path toward a $700 million bridge without being very explicit about why they're in favor of it. How about a chart showing the position of each City Council member, plus the Mayor, on the Third Bridge: yay or nay?

Along with the #1 reason each elected official believes the bridge is needed, or not needed. Without this sort of responsible journalism, Salem's citizens could end up being saddled with an almost billion-dollar price tag and not know why their city leaders want them to pay that bill. 

Rush hour congestion? Earthquake readiness? Speeding of traffic to Highway 22 and I-5? I'm pretty familiar with the arguments made by proponents of a Third Bridge; I haven't heard even one that makes sense, given the current plan for the bridge. 

Why isn't the Statesman Journal doing a better job of reporting on the Third Bridge? Is it because of your editorial position in favor of it, which made as little sense as the bridge itself? 

Good questions. You need to assign someone at the Statesman Journal to look into them. I suggest... you.

They were given to me in response to two public records requests that I filed, wanting to learn more about the City's outrageous approval of US Bank's request to cut down five large healthy trees in downtown's Historic District.

I was charged $350 for them.

Happy early Father's Day to me, from me! But I would have preferred to have spent the money on something else. I've asked for a waiver or reduction of the fee since my request clearly was in the public interest.

I'm only had time to look through the documents quickly. I need to ask some follow-up questions of City staff based on what I've found so far.

But I wanted to share some initial conclusions, because I believe these records point to some general "personality traits" of the City of Salem (Oregon) these days.

Yes, organizations have personalities, because they are comprised of people. Leader-people have an especially strong effect on the personality of the organization they head up, since lower-downs want to please higher-ups.

With decisions on a Third Bridge, downtown parking meters, riverfront development, and other important issues on the front burner, how the City approaches public policy issues is a matter, obviously, of broad public concern.

My initial perusal of the documents confirms impressions I'd already gotten about the City of Salem, circa mid-2013 (details to follow):

Facts and expert advice are ignored. 
Decisions are made, then reasons for them are found (should be other way around).
Special interests get more attention than the public interest.
Overarching vision is obscured by a nearsighted focus.
Public involvement is viewed as an irritant.

Not good.

Now, I'm not saying these problems are all-pervasive among City staff, elected officials, and the various departments. But I see them as real concerns which need to be addressed.

They should also be in 2013 -- for businesses in downtown Salem, Oregon which have to keep paying an Economic Improvement District assessment even after city officials took away their ability to have any say in how that money is spent.

Salem Cherry Pits and Petals tells the sorry tale in "The City is asking for another year of EID funding." Excerpt:

We should ask City Council to stop collection of the EID assessment as of June 30, 2013.  We no longer have any accountability for how the funds are spent, as was promised in the EID renewal information.  There is no contract between the City and downtown tax-payers for responsible use of the funds, no budget approval method, no reporting required, and no accountability.

If you would like to send an email to city council, asking them to stop collecting the EID assessment as of June 2013, please use this email address:

CITYCOUNCIL@CITYOFSALEM.NET

"What's the only difference between Jay Lake and a ham?"
"The ham is curable."

Read the entire Oregonian story that was in today's paper. Since it probably will disappear into the paid archives before too long, I've copied the story in its entirety and attached it as a continuation to this post.

Jay Lake probably won't be immortal, but he can damn well have his story live on in cyberspace for as long as possible.

Which I'm sure his web site, jlake.com, will. On his blog, Jay has been writing about his medical condition and life. I plan to be a regular reader. 

I'm not terminal (except in the sense that we all are). But I've thought about how much sense it makes to have a memorial service for me while I'm alive -- when I could enjoy it. I was glad to see that Jay is doing just that. 

A Jay Wake is scheduled for July 27. Sounds like a smiling-time will be had by all. Some excerpts from the Jay Wake page:

You are invited to the pre-mortem wake and roast for Jay Lake, a somewhat morbid, deeply irreverent, but joyous celebration of Jay’s life. This is a time for celebrating Jay’s life, loves, and dark, twisted sense of humor. Bring your stories (hysterical, at Jay’s expense), your tasteless jokes, and any and all expressions gleefully macabre. Come party with the man who has never passed up the chance to poke cancer in the eye and laugh about it.

...The Roast will begin at about 7:30. Be warned: the jokes and stories contained herein will not only push the boundaries of good taste, they will leapfrog over the boundaries blowing a raspberry. This is not a time to say how Jay touched your life. This is a time to say how Jay touched you inappropriately.

Beautiful.

Read on for the Oregonian story. 

So why is the popular science fiction writer and blogger wearing a floppy hat with horns at a bookstore event for his new novel? Why is he planning three events in his own honor -- JayCon, JayFest and JayWake -- in the next two months? Why is this his new favorite joke? 

"What's the only difference between Jay Lake and a ham?"

"The ham is curable."

And what's up with those hard drives on his dining room table, the ones that contain his whole genetic sequence? If Lake has his way, sometime in the next few weeks they'll be posted on the Internet for all to see and study, making him perhaps the first person to put his entire genetic sequence out there at no charge.

It's easy to find answers to those questions. Online and in person, Lake is available, honest and articulate. His sometimes funny, always-frank reports on his medical condition attract tens of thousands of followers to his blogs and Facebook page. He's been writing publicly about his cancer since the second day and hasn't backed off as the prognosis has gotten grimmer.

"At this point, there's only bad news and worse news," Lake says, reclining in a chair in the suburban duplex where he lives with his 15-year-old daughter. Lake turned 49 last week and doesn't look too bad for someone with a body full of tumors and surgical scars crisscrossing his chest and stomach. He's been taking Regorafenib, a drug designed to fight the growth of the tumors, and the side effects haven't really kicked in yet.

One side effect is pain and skin loss in his hands and feet, and if that happens he won't be able to write, only dictate. At that point there will be a decision about whether the potential for increased life span is worth the decline in quality of life, but that's a little ways down the road. In the meantime, Lake is an open book. He's comfortable answering any question. Fire away.

Lake has published nine novels and more than 300 short stories, but cancer has brought him more attention than science fiction. His blog posts and the chatty, forthright way he describes his condition ("Field Notes From Cancerland" is a regular feature) have won him admirers around the world. The reaction to the bad news and worse news has been an outpouring of affection and support that leaves him almost speechless. Not quite speechless, but almost.

"We know where this road is taking me," Lake wrote on his blog last month. "We just don't know how hard, or for how long. I will continue to tell this story in as much detail as I can manage, as the value of that narrative has been overwhelmingly demonstrated time and time again. Telling this story is one of the few good things I can derive from cancer. I cannot cheat death, but I can cheat the terror of the disease a little by easing it for others."

When Lake was profiled in The Oregonian in April of 2012, he had four tattoos of the zodiac sign for cancer on his left wrist, one for each of his surgeries, and two biohazard symbols representing chemotherapy series. Since then he's added another cancer sign (for the January surgery on his liver that revealed the new tumors) and two new biohazard symbols that aren't filled in because he didn't finish the chemotherapy series (either because it wasn't working or wasn't a full series). There are also tattoos on the back of his head that aren't visible when his hair is grown out, and one that says "If You Can Read This, I Have Cancer Again."

"This is the (sign) for cancer," Lake says, pointing to his wrist. "I'm actually a Gemini. It's a pun."

He counts off.

"Cancer, cancer, cancer, cancer, cancer."

Tattoos are body art, a permanent expression of a feeling or emotion designed to go to the grave with those who bear the pain of having them done. Lake likes his tattoos but wants his legacy to be his fiction and his writing about cancer.

Another potentially more important legacy presented itself when he had genetic testing done in February. The idea was to look for genes implicated in the cancer that might be affected by drugs other than the ones he'd been taking. It didn't work, but one result was Lake now possesses a full sequence of his healthy DNA and his tumor DNA, and he plans to offer it up to anyone who wants to have a look at it.

"I'm open-sourcing my genome so that scientists and doctors as well as hobbyists and students can have access to a full human genome, which is very difficult to find right now," he says. "I haven't been able to help myself very much so maybe I can help some other people."

Somebody could study that and come up with something that will save the world.

"That's exactly right. That's why I want to give it away, so that somebody else can help save the world. If that becomes true then I have triumphed over my disease. Even if I'm not here to know it. My daughter will know. You will know. Everybody will know."

To raise money for the whole genome sequencing, some of Lake's many friends in the science fiction community organized an "Acts of Whimsy" fundraiser. Mary Robinette Kowal read selections of beloved classics as phone sex. Scott Lynch and Elizabeth Bear performed a sock puppet show of one of Lake's short stories. Neil Gaiman performed a cover from the Magnetic Fields album "69 Love Songs" while accompanying himself on the ukulele. Howard Tayler drew a picture of Lake kicking cancer's rear end. Klingon language expert Lawrence Schoen presented five pick-up lines used in Federations bars by Klingons.

The goal was to raise $20,000. About $50,000 was raised. Lake was (almost) speechless again.

 When did it go from bad news to worse news?

"Right up until the January surgery we were still hoping we could beat this thing," Lake says. "When they opened me up ... (the surgeon) said to me later 'normally if we open you up and find unexpected tumors we just close. We don't keep going.' ... I went into surgery thinking I had three, maybe four tumors, and when I woke up I had eight. I had gone from being advanced to being terminal in that moment."

What was your reaction?

"Shock and despair. I don't want to die. We're all born with our tickets punched. There's a level at which it's possible to be kind of philosophical about it but when it comes down to this year, at this point in my life ...

"I don't know why I'm shocked. This has been in the wind for a while. But nonetheless every time I get new bad news it's shocking. And there's despair and there's anger and there's frustration. The only emotion I don't permit myself is self-pity.

"Why me? I think it's an unfair question. The universe is not fair or unfair. It just is. If it happens to me, too bad.

"And you know? It's a good year. I'm up for four major awards in my writing career. Things are happening. Some of them are terrible, but some of them are good."

In March Lake had a meeting with his oncologist on the seventh floor of the OHSU Center for Health and Healing. It was a sunny spring afternoon, and he was accompanied by his father, Joe Lake, a retired diplomat, and his friend Lisa Costello. Lake was tired and talked emphatically about how the health care system is unfair to those who don't have the resources he does. He has a good insurance plan through his job and noted that his insurance company has spent more than $1 million keeping him alive. His medical file is 6,500 pages.

"As a society we make people, in the most difficult time in their lives, do the most work. We have a health care system that assumes fraud and requires you to go to great lengths to demonstrate that you're not committing fraud. That means a lot of paperwork and a lot of compliance at a time when most people are the least equipped to do those things. It's highly, highly punitive. It's very Calvinist. It's a very conservative mindset: 'You are stealing a benefit from me.' That's what the system says. 'Prove to me you're not stealing before I'll help you.' It's disgusting."

Lake is writing shorter fiction these days because he doesn't have the strength and sustained concentration necessary for novels. A novella called "Love in the Time of Metal and Faith" will be out later this year. A book about cancer called "Going to Extremes" has been revamped because it was going to be built around a trip to Antarctica with Bronwyn that's not going to happen. The new working title is "Jay Lake's Book of the Dead."

JayCon is Lake's birthday party. It started in 2000 when he moved to Portland and turned 37; it's a pizza party for family and friends. 

JayFest is a group of writer friends gathering at Powell's Books at Cedar Hills Crossing to read and sign books with some of the proceeds going to charity. 

JayWake is a memorial service and roast, a chance for friends to celebrate his life while he's around to hear it. He plans to enter the party being carried in a coffin and will pop out at the right moment.

Isn't that a lot of Jay?

"Most writers are a neurotic mess, including me if you catch me on the right day, but at the core of it you really have to believe in what you're thinking and doing to think anyone else (cares). You're a little bit like the 3-year-old who walks onstage during the church play and says 'look at me!' ... There's a level at which I'm perfectly happy to hear my name. It gives me something to be happy about at this time when most things that make me happy are being stripped away, piece by piece, never to return."

 Do people come to you asking for wisdom because they know you're dying, like "Tuesdays With Morrie" or something?

"My term for that is Special Dying Person Wisdom." 

Do you have some?

"No. Love yourself. Love your kids. Be nice to people. But I did that before I got sick, you know?

"I don't think there is Special Dying Person Wisdom. What there is is Special Dying Person Focus. There's the famous concept that nothing concentrates the mind like the prospect of a hanging. That's me. My mind is concentrated."

Reading: JayFest starts at 6 p.m. Thursday at Powell's Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 S.W. Cedar Hills Blvd., Beaverton. Participating authors include David Levine, Phyllis Irene Radford, Devon Monk, Barb and J.C. Hendee, Shannon Page, Mark Ferrari, J.A. Pitts, M.K. Hobson, Diana Pharaoh Francis and Tina Connolly.

A fellow senior citizen who I often see in one of the weight rooms asked me if I knew what was going on. "High school graduation," I told him. "I think either South Salem or Sprague High School uses the club for a party every year."

Driving home, I saw a car with a big 2013 marked on the back window.

To prove to myself that I wasn't too senile to do some math in my head, I calculated how many years separated this year's high school graduation class from mine.

Um... 1966 is 34 years from 2000... add on 13... 47 years! Hadn't realized until then that my 50-year high school reunion would be coming up in just three years -- not that anyone is interested in organizing this. 

Watching youngish-looking parents bustle around the club preparing for the party (at my age, just about everyone looks young), I got to thinking about how I used to believe in reincarnation. And why.

I'd like to have another crack at life. I'd like to graduate from high school again. I'd like to be a teenager looking at the sign afixed to the men's locker room door: it said something like "Life Ahead," showing lines and arrows with various branching directions.

For me, a 64 year old baby boomer, the direction of my life is pretty much settled.

Sure, there are all sorts of unpredictable twists and turns ahead. But where I've been is, mathematically and logically, a much longer journey that where I have left to go.

(Unless I live to be older than 128... virtually impossible unless I can sell my soul to the Ageless Fairy in exchange for an extended life span, something I'm totally willing to do, by the way... hope she reads blog posts.)

After seeing that 2013 on the car window I realized that graduating from high school now is a heck of a lot different from how us in the Class of 1966 experienced the world after graduation. 

I headed to San Jose State College. Started taking classes in the fall of 1966.

Not quite a year later was The Summer of Love in close-by San Francisco. It felt like the world was changing. Because it was. We flower-bedecked LSD-taking marijuana-smoking hippies were going to alter the Earth's rotation, change the seasons, institute whole new ways of doing things, start a revolution!

Sure, we were psychedelically and politically delusional. But I sure enjoyed the illusion while it lasted. There never was a time like the late 1960's, especially in the place that was the San Francisco Bay Area. 

Today Obama speaks about hope and change. Back then we were living it; more... we felt we were it. When I neared my college graduation I remember thinking, "I always want to live close to a university; I never want to be away from young people like me who are changing the world."

I did get away, though. I was married young, had a daughter soon thereafter, bought a house in Portland, Oregon a few years later. 

When I look at my "Most Likely To Succeed" photo taken at the end of my high school senior year, I wonder, have I succeeded? Immediately followed by an antidote to that ridiculous wondering: Who the hell cares, or can say?

Like Popeye (I sure loved my childhood comic book collection), I yam what I yam. We all are. I have no doubt that graduates of the Class of 2013 are going to have marvelously interesting lives, just as my Class of 1966 did. 

I hope they also will feel that they're changing the world.

Baby boomers like me are so self-centered, it's tough for us to imagine that there ever will be another cultural movement like The Summer of Love. Each generation needs something like that, though -- a feeling that now we're going to show those old folks how the world should be.

A few years after I graduated from high school, the clean-cut guy in the photo above had become a freaking yoga teacher (of sorts). Now that's a revolution!

Keep it up, Class of 2013. Change yourselves. Change the world. And never stop changing. Even when you're 64.