" DEEP IN MY HEART " by alka narula

Life

2013-05-18T02:53:00.001+05:30

Few lines of enlightenment once again

My debacle

My disastrous collapse
A catastrophe
The ultimate epitome of devastation,
Is all I can speak of
Till the time I am alone

Silently I try to gather

Bits of my long forgotten dreams
And pieces of my life
That lie on the floor
I try to spread my wings
But they are caught in the web
That he spun in his loom

Like a child I try to free me
But the loops are too strong

My doubts are no wrong
He will not let go off me
Till the time the stains have dried
Until they have disappeared from my robe

The revel it seems is not for me
For I have not learnt to live
I heard him roar just now
And asked me to feast
He said " Why do you worry without cause
When each one of you have come alone
And will exit alone "

Copyright ©2012alkanarula photo credit - google image search results Link for your google analytic code

JUST LIKE THAT (JLT)

2013-05-18T00:32:00.001+05:30

Few lines in hindi please click the link to read the original post

http://floating-diamonds.blogspot.in/2013/05/doar.html

"Zara suno toe
Ruk kar chalo toe
Meri aankhon mein doob kar kaho toe
Keh kar toe dekho
Main hoon tumhare dil ki pari......

Copyright ©2012alkanarula photo credit - google image search results Link for your google analytic code

The Omen

2013-05-12T22:55:00.001+05:30

Few lines on the dark when I am surrounded by The Omen in me ....My satanic thoughts at times are too strong that I find it hard to free myself from palpable feelings....

Buried in the darkness
Only Silhouettes surrounding me
I grope in the dark
But the hollow walls are all I can feel

My satanic thoughts have become strong
They have begun to overpower me
The palpable feelings are strong
I try to move away from thee

I try to erase the memories of past
But the walls seem to have ears they can hear me
They speak to me in the dark
Ask me if I can live in emotional poverty

I nod my head in contradiction
Yet cant stop the self destructive thoughts
The omen that is in me
Who now is my guide who has begun to navigate me

My mind is too hazy I am lost
The consequences don't bother me
Like an unpredictable eccentric
I cruise on anonymous streets

Copyright ©2012alkanarula
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Set Me Free

2013-05-12T16:06:00.001+05:30

Life is an unsolved mystery , a maze that the heavens control but we like pawns on chess board play as planned ..... few lines on jigsaw puzzle of life

My heart my soul your aches
None can hear your shrieks
Nor one knows
Who set ablaze my wings

The mystery of blood shed
When my heart was strewn apart
I watched him play with
The chords of his only violin

No questions I can ask
I Know if my eyes rained and poured
None would be there to console
The irony of life I must live with it

My nights and days are swarmed with thoughts
I can see him play with
And roll her in his arms
And hear his loud chants
" You are amazing, I love your beautiful skin "

My knees have become too week to
Sail me through the agony and pain of life
They refuse to take the lead and I am told
Freedom of my souls is the only remedy

"O heaven of wonders" I hate your world of treachery
The shining stars , the moon are none but a cleverly placed grift
An unknown maze , I am forced to wonder
Would you create space for me or force me to live few lives in smog
Before you set my soul free

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CHECKMATE

2013-05-08T02:24:00.001+05:30

I know Check Mate sounds absurd while you read or write poetry but I just couldn't refrain from using this word ( some personal reasons )...

Last battle in thy ground
The tell tale marks and my frowns
Speak of debacle
My overthrown dynasty
Massacre of my world

My magnificent dream was slaughtered in thy battle ground
Before I could anchor by the shore
Untended ,alone on a deserted road
I hear no rain ,smell no petrichor nor I see the sun shone

Sweet spring just went by
The primroses are still fresh on my mind
Though I may not see them blossom again
My injured heart is too week to even gasp for air

"O Slumber" could you seal my soul
My tormented heels refuse to stroll
The flowering shrubs that deck thy world
Lost the significance since I was told
"Checkmate ! You looser , I am the one who controls "

Can you bring me a sparkling white robe
Can you arrange for few chrysanthemums and few marigold
Can I ask you to endow the loveliest place
That I heard you brought into being for your loved ones alone
Where with none other than you and solitude I can sojourn

Copyright ©2012alkanarula photo credit - google image search results Link for your google analytic code

Conspiracy

2013-05-04T13:34:00.001+05:30

Most of us do indulge in frequent conversation with life in unfavourable circumstances , at times blame it on fate or destiny for not so good things that happen to us in our lives and at the same time many of us believe in writing our own destiny. But somehow I strongly believe in cosmic power without who we would not be here to write or change our destiny.........................................................................Such is life !

Calm down my broken heart
I spoke to destiny
It came in my dream
When I was awake
Trying to gauge the pain
You have been in

I spoke to fate
About you at length
Like a slave I lay in its feet
And pleaded
Let me take a plunge
In to The Dark
Away from life that has been so mean

Futile my efforts,they went in vain
They failed to comprehend pain
As they have no heart
I was amazed
When the fate took me in its arms
And said " You cant run away from me "

My reins are in his arms
I only have a role to play
As I am told
I have no control over life
Who is friends with destiny
And not you and me

I am his slave
Don't blame me for his faults
If you can
Try to convince my fate
Who too has conspired
Against you and me
Along with destiny

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Victory

2013-05-04T01:57:00.000+05:30

Few lines on victory .....

Why do you beat " My Heart" so hard
When you know there's none to hear your sobs
Nor wipe you clean when you bleed

Why do you purse while you cry
When you know the autumn has taken away the rose
And replaced it with phiz Oh my " Rosy Lips "

What do you try to look at and watch " My Eyes "
When you know its only tears you will see
That would roll down my cheeks

"My Palms" you too have begun to feel so coarse
Its time to give up
When you know revel has slipped through your fingers

Oh " My Mind" ,what do you think
Why are you troubled with your thoughts
When you know life is the another name of melancholy

Why do you blink and laugh
What are you so proud of "My Soul"
Its time for you to realize you are me
You must be set free to celebrate your victory

Copyright ©2012alkanarula photo credit - google image search results Link for your google analytic code

Silence

2013-05-03T23:30:00.000+05:30

Pain is a strange experience that most of us go through at some point of time in our lives and all of us have different ways to express it. Some of us express it through eyes , some of us through silence and some of us through words .....

I seek freedom
Freedom from qualms
The silence too has begun to speak for me

I can feel the agony
The pain has begun to overpower me
I am under siege

Shattered ,
I am back in your arms
With none but my shadow beside me

My breath is no more strong
The calm
Has become my companion for life it seems

My eyes
Have become warm
In struggle to fight my tears that refuse to recede

I seek no reason
Nor wish to know what is wrong
But relief from my breathing heart that has begun to hurt me

My mind is no more muddled
But waits for you to kill my curiosities
They have become my enemies

Speak to me " Oh you holy calm "
Its time to walk me through the silence with your arms around me
To thy world where no eyes can follow me

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I Miss You

2013-04-27T17:01:00.001+05:30

A guest post by Nishu Bhandula , a visualizer by profession ,who I happened to meet at studios while editing a song sequence for an upcoming movie " Tere Pyaar Mein Paapad " I was pleasantly surprised to discover that she loves to write poetry and here I take the pleasure to share her musings with you all

I miss you in my darkest hour , when I am alone and we are far...

I miss you in my sweetest dream , without you its not fun to scream ...

I miss you in my lonely nights,i want you beside me to hold me tight ...

One thing that i really miss........ Is the time when we Kissed

I miss you from the bottom of my heart.. love me , miss me you are my sweetheart...

I want to spend evry moment of my life with you ,even if it would be dark i am alwes with you ....

Please hug me i need your love...

There is nothing beautiful than this over and above...

Hold my hand in the crowd,you are the 1 among millions I found....

Make my life a beautiful journey..

fill it with the most memorable moments of my life..

Be with me till the day i take last few breaths in your arms...

I Love You from every little corner of my Heart..

Last Night

2013-04-20T00:20:00.000+05:30

Few lines inspired by one of my favourite writers Paulo Coelho . His writings are never ending source of inspiration for me . One of his , my favourite quotes "Stay strong because things will get better it might be stormy but it cant rain forever "

The foot marks on my heart
Whispered to me last night
Told me those are signs of your strides in my life
And are there to stay forever

I searched for the source of fragrance
Looked around in the dark
The calm night told me
My own shadow bears your musk
Why should I search for the source
"He is by your side and there to stay forever"

I searched for your heart
I found it behind my smiles
Tucked away from the world forever

I turned around in the dark

Found your heart caressing mine
Speaking to my heart heard muffled voice(s)
Like never I had heard before never ever

The promising night and assurances of the dark
Were kind enough to erase frowns from my face
Like they were never there ever

My searching eyes were put to calm
When muffling sounds spoke to my heart
And said " Stay strong because things will get better
It might be stormy but it cant rain forever "

He may not be in your arms
But with your thoughts in his heart
He is sure to find the way
To erase the dark from your life
And make the life smile at you forever

Copyright ©2012alkanarula photo credit - google image search results Link for your google analytic code

labyrinth

2013-04-16T18:37:00.002+05:30

This piece is about a woman's fight within herself a woman caught up in labyrinth of life.

Who would know
The pain that she goes through
When she watches the sunrise
Followed by a reflection
That says "You have no place in his life
He is mine , you are a fool living in a fools paradise "

Her only accomplice her tears have known
The saline waters in her eyes is behind the glow
And is mistaken for sunrise

She tried to go but the fragments of her heart don't show
Their intent to accompany few more yards
With staggering feet of her' that she calls mine

Though her soul in deep pain
It argued with her heart
" If you are brave enough say good bye
life will treat you with a new welcome in life "( Paulo Coelho)

Her conversation with her heart failed
Its content with bits and pieces of happiness
That it can gather on its way
Towards the end of journey
As it knows she has come closer than before, to the pyre
That waits to engulf her in its arms
Make her lighter than air
Free her soul from the labyrinth of life

She looks at her scattered dreams
Who laugh mercilessly at her and make her feel
Like a twig blown with harsh wind
Smile when they watch her burn
With an infant desire
" Why couldn't she be the one and only woman in his life "

Copyright ©2012alkanarula photo credit - google image search results

I Love Myself

2013-04-13T16:30:00.000+05:30

.We all have turning points in our life , so did I and I call them soul stirring moments .Here are few lines about awakening and enlightenment of my soul that changed my life.

Neither my beginning nor the end
Neither I had nor I will have control
Its all about his hands

Neither my present nor my future
I can control
It is controlled by his wand

My past I am told
" Is bygone
I must not regret "

"Like a docked ship in troubled waters
I must flow
Till I reach the horizon
The infinite world that never ends "

"Like a Diva
In this world
I must venture ahead"

"Walk down the road
Wait for the story to unfold
Don't let the unknown world
haunt my soul"

"By now I must know
The burning desire and audacity of hope
Are the last musketeers alive in this world "

I pushed my spirit
Beyond my physical cage
To understanding of who I am

Forgave myself for the sins I made in the past
Make constant effort to shine radiantly in the dark
For at the end of the day
When my actions have paved the way
I must take pride when I say " I love myself"

Copyright ©2012alkanarula photo credit -
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My Beloved (A guest post )

2013-04-11T14:01:00.001+05:30

I take pleasure to introduce Akshit Dawar (www.akshitdawar.blogspot.com) . He has a significant style of expressing emotions and I am sure you will agree with me after going through this piece of poetry.

Fuchsia O fuchsia

There is a dream in my heart

You are its vision

There is a love to impart

From my hearts heavenly Elysian

There is love, there is warmth

In every blink of my beat

There are tears aswarmed

Before they sprout let us meet

I kiss the wave gliding to your heart

Allow your heart to feel it once

Let the barriers fall apart

Steal the moment and romance in cadence

Petals of life need your care

A lifelong shower of trust and lust

Fuse in me like a cream in éclair

You come to me before I rust

Fuchsia O fuchsia

A life is in love

There is a shadow, rest is love

Book Release Coverage in PBD

2013-04-03T14:20:00.001+05:30

Finally my poetry book " Deep In My Heart " was released on 30th Mar 2013 the date to reckon with !
RSMP Mr Mani Shankar Aiyar was kind enough to spare some time to unveil the book despite the fact his grand daughter's Birth day coincided with the date of launch . And so was film maker and author of Ameer Baniye, Mr Uunnat Duutt who made the evening special with his presence. And here is the coverage on the Book release in Political &Business daily dt 31st Mar 2013 ....

An evening of honours , moments to reckon with , undoubtedly a day to remember an event that rocked Hotel Ashok , N Dehi but I was nervous until I saw Mr Mani Shankar being escorted inside the venue. Though despite the fact he had a birth day party in his own house yet he had promised to spare time for the lauch. But I had all sorts of thoughts that clouded my mind , and those were " what if he forgets " or "what if some family member stops him from going out " etc etc . and to top it up he was late by almost 9mns on the day when each minute of two hour event was planned and re planned to suite his convenience . Suddenly I heard whispers followed by camera clicks , a sigh of relief , there he was wearing a different look from what he usually wears . Every thing went off well except I pictured very badly but I don't mind sharing them with you , after all those are very special moments of my life and will stay close to my heart !

Copyright ©2012alkanarula photo credit - google image search results
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2013-03-25T16:13:00.002+05:30

Here is the design for invitation card for my book launch scheduled on 30th March 2013....Entry by invitation card only

Sunrise

2013-03-24T23:01:00.001+05:30

We tend to forget our past and move on but it remains embedded deep in our subconscious mind though we may not want to think or talk about it but it does make an attempt to come back .Sunrise is about my conversation with my past , that I left behind .....

Oh , my past never come close to my lips
Lie where I left you abandoned
Don't you peek through my eyes
Speak to me at night
When I am isolated from the world
Away from everyone, when none can hear your plight
But not when the sunrises
Now don't start again and make me cry
Some sadness is a part of everyone's life
Some sunshine is a part of everyone's life
I want no clouds of pain and sadness loom
Nor I want tears to come close to my eyes
Now don't scare this lonely heart
That has learnt to embrace eagerness it keeps me alive
My eyes are filled with dreams, my desires kept alive
I flow like free wind , like a free river
Embrace every moment with open arms
See a new horizon every time I open my eyes
And changed my name to fragrance that floats in the air
and has no voice...
About which you know and I know too
Then why your eyes are wet ,why do you cry
Why don't you speak to my heart ,seek some advice
It comes in my dreams every time when you speak to me at night
Gives me a piece of its mind
I thought of sharing it with you tonight
Make you hear my heart , its advice
"Every second is a new season,
Why do you let go of such priceless moments for no reason
Thinking of evil ( here: past )
Embrace the deep silence with pride
Its a part of everyone's fate
Don't let the evil thoughts come close to you
Nor your eyes "
Is all it sayS and disappears in the darkness of night
Now leave me alone its time for sunrise !

Copyright ©2012alkanarula
photo credit - google image search result

When The Universe Aligned For Me

2013-03-23T00:25:00.000+05:30

" When you really want something in life the entire universe will align itself to give it to you " Paulo Coelho

It feels great as one gets closer to accomplishment of ones dreams , but that's not the case with me instead I got butterflies in my stomach and I have every reason to feel nervous. And I am sure once you have gone through the details of my book launch you will agree with me. Well before I share the details of the book launch of " Deep In My Heart " A Cyberwit Publication . Here is the amazon link in , http://www.amazon.com/Deep-My-Heart-Alka-Narula/dp/8182533856/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1363022983&sr=1-1 The book will be up for sale from March 30th 2013.

My book of poetry " Deep In my Heart " due for release on March 30th 2013 will be presented by Balkan -Ji-Bari International ( Since 1923 , the oldest NGO in India) Some of the distinguished personalities who have been at the helm of affairs , are Dr Rajinder Prasad , Dr Sarvapalli Radhakrishnan, Dr Zaakir Hussain , Mr Fakhrudin Ali Ahmed ,Mr Gulzari Lal Nanda , Mr Morarji Desai and Dr Radha Raman , and what an honor it is to have a preface written by RSMP Mr Mani Shankar Aiyar who also also agreed to unveil the book . I have no words to express my gratitude towards him.

I would like to thank my daughter for encouraging me to share my poetry with the world , I would also like to thank Dutt Productions https://www.facebook.com/TerePyaarMeinPaapad for art work of the book . And my special thanks to Balkan -Ji-Bari International http://nonprofits.halabol.com/Balkan-Ji-Bari-international and Mr.Mani Shankar Aiyar.

Copyright ©2012alkanarula photo credit - google image search

What Lies In A Name

2013-03-21T22:05:00.000+05:30

What lies in a name is about a woman pleading her love to stay in her life , no matter if he gives her his name or not , no matter if he can express his love for her or not, she only craves that he should stay in her life till death do them part....hope you would enjoy it , Pl read on and if possible share the experience of your visit

Like clouds of rain my eyes shall pour

If you go

If you try to erase your name from my life

My only hope

Who shall I blame for the pain in my eyes

That would embrace

Life too will claim it was right

I have notorious ways

My failure would remind me of stains on my heart

How will I cope

You need not give me your name nor announce

Don't you know

Just a corner in your heart an isolated place

Where I can stay alone

What lies in a name I can stay without

Names can be changed

Douse me in flames of your love

I wont complain

Be there in my life till death do us part

Is the only thing for I crave

Copyright ©2012alkanarula

photo credit - google images

The end

2013-03-10T00:49:00.001+05:30

Few lines inspired by Bhagwad Gita about the ultimate truth of life , please read on

My journey on a road

That I know will end
Though I may not hear the knock

Do I fear my end

Do I care whether I will erode with dust

Or will be rendered to flames

Do I fear the tears that would roll

Or do I care who would laugh

Do I care whether I will go

Before I accomplish my tasks

My delusions about the Self

Came to an end

When I heard him roar

When he said

'Why do you worship when you know

You have no control

You have to live with pre determined destiny that I wrote

Before you took your first breath

So is your last breath in my control

Take my advice don't try to hold on your guise

That is composed of five elements ,

And the elements are bound to erode

They don't last

The very Self is the supreme Truth.
There is neither injury nor non injury in It.

The only homogeneous Reality is your spirit
It is pure, bodiless and is imperishable
Your spirit is the only priceless gift that is yours
That I allow in my regime !"

Copyright ©2012alkanarula

photo credits google image search result

" Deep In My Heart " the book cover

2013-03-01T12:36:00.001+05:30

Here's the final cover of my book " Deep In My Heart " ,which is due for release on March 29 ' 2013
here in Delhi at IIC in the presence of some top dignitaries . Though some editing is required in the text , but I just couldn't stop from sharing ,please feel free to give your inputs. I would also like to thank team Dutt Productions https://www.facebook.com/TerePyaarMeinPaapad for their support and art work for the cover.

Copyright ©2012alkanarula

"Deep In My Heart " Book of Poetry

2013-02-25T14:02:00.000+05:30

Well , I am all set for my book of poetry " Deep In My Heart " due for release on Mar 29'2013. Here's my pic for the back cover , thought of sharing with you all ....photo credits
https://www.facebook.com/TerePyaarMeinPaapad Team !

Copyright ©2012alkanarula

Daffodils

2013-02-24T18:40:00.001+05:30

A sensual piece of poetry depicting the beauty of a man and woman relationship....Filled with joy and ecstasy I was with thee,,,when I saw you bathe me with daffodils !

They say there's always a lull before storm
I went through a similar feeling
When you were trying to put me to sleep
When you said
Sleep on while I talk to thee
My eyes though were full of sleep
But I was trying to hear you , how you talk to me
While I sleep
I felt nice when you draped my body
With your silky feel
When you covered my naked body
With daffodils
Though I was shy but I let it be
I let you feel my every string
As a matter of fact
No more my body belongs to me
Now it belongs to thee
I wished if you could merge in me
And I could merge in thee
Like a cloud we could fly away
In a world of mystery
With that thought in my mind I fell asleep
While you talked to me , whispered a lullaby in my ear
I dreamt of you ,saw you in my dream
When you put me to sleep
Filled with joy and ecstasy, I was with thee
When I saw you bathe me with daffodils !

Copyright ©2012alkanarula

photo credits google image search

Himeros

2013-02-24T15:08:00.000+05:30

Few lines on love and desire inspired by Gary Lenhart

He just walked into my life

Neither he knocked

Nor he told me , he has arrived

He just tread on my heart and walked

Left his footprints on my heart

He whispered and asked
If he could kiss my red lips
That he said "Are  redder than coral in the sea "
I loved his soothing sound , yet well I knew
The music would shy away if it heard the melody in his soundw

I saw roses damasked ,red and white

But none to compare the one on my cheeks

When he asked " Would you be  mine "

The fragrance of flowers that I looked at

When he arched to kiss my lips

Mellowed down when his breath came close to mine

I grant  never before I had seen a Himeros (god of love desire )

Until he walked and tread on my heart

Until he ,touched me softly

Played with my chords

And made me realise

Though he has come in to my life without a knock

Yet to stay put till dawns to come

When he took me into his arms

And said " I wont let go off you

As long as you don't erase my foot marks from your heart

Being in love and loved by some one who you are in love with is rare !

Copyright ©2012alkanarula

photo credits google image search

Thine Eyes

2013-02-23T21:56:00.000+05:30

Once again few lines inspired by Daag Dehlvi Ji These word are about a man who is madly in love with a woman , who pledges to quit drinking if she accepted his heart...

"Your eyes" he said " Are loads and loads of wine
Don't hasten and close the door
I beg , listen to my one last plea
Let me bathe in divinity of those eyes
I shall have no regret if I drowned
If you smother me with thine eyes
I pledge I shall never look for pints nor for wine
No matter , how strong urge I may have
To quench my thirst , from the soul that may rise
Thou art Venus , my Aphrodite
I would change my course for you
For thine blue eyes
I beg you turn around for a little while
Look at the wreath that I placed out side your door last night
I concealed a necklace beneath the rose , that holds my heart
That is no more mine
Your foot prints is all you will find ,if you opened the door
If you looked at my heart
That was , once upon a time my treasure ,was mine
I plead adorn it around your serpentine neck
Keep it close to your heart , now its thine !

Copyright ©2012alkanarula
photo credits Google Image Search

MY BOOK COVER DESIGN

2013-02-19T18:23:00.001+05:30

My book " Deep In My Heart " cover design