Hooray For...

2009-01-14T15:55:00.000-08:00

Hello children of the new year!
Time for another blast of New Year gratitude. In all my excitement and positivity about the coming year and all of those following after I seemed to be forgetting all the good things that actually happened in '08. It's funny, I had no trouble recalling the lack of lucrative or satisfying work, the writers' strike, the craptastic economy, rising gas prices, ongoing war, Prop 8, SAG /Producer stalemates, my torn calf muscle, or credit card debt. What about all the good things? The Great things even? They must have been there among the bad or I would have lost my mind, my lunch, and likely my will to live, right?

On New Year's Eve at one of my favorite places to catch great music, Room 5, there was a guy sitting next to me at the bar writing down his list of things for which he was grateful in the quickly fading '08. It went on for 3 pages! I found myself growing more depressed with every addition he made. I could see the joy in his face every time he recalled something new. It started me thinking about my '08 list. My first thought was, "What a shitty year". Not a great start to a gratitude list. Hmmm. I decided to not think about it until after the show... you know... next year. Problem was, every time I thought about the list I got hung up on what was so great. Yeah, I mean I was grateful for the I can see, hear, taste, touch, walk stuff. And for the place to live and the car to drive. The family and friends. But that seemed somehow ordinary. Fucked up, right? I had three friends (under the age of 35) die, 4 friends or family members diagnosed with cancer, and several friends lose there homes or cars because of the economy, all in the last 12 months, and here I was this ungrateful bastard not happy with my "ordinary" blessings. WTF?

Then a few days ago I popped in a CD I hadn't listened to in a long time and this great song called "Photograph" by Jamie Cullum came on. There's a line that goes, "When I look back on my ordinary, ordinary life I see so much magic, though I missed it at the time...". Wow. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I almost had to pull off the road. Everything came in to focus for the first time in months. I smiled. That "a-ha" kind of smile you get when the little lightbulb above your head finally goes on. I even felt a tear or two well up. Suddenly I was inundated with thoughts of all the wonderful things, big and small, that had made up my '08. So in no particular order here is my short list:

- I went back to New Zealand for the second time and had enough time off to explore the South Island and hang out with some amazing people I now count as friends.
- I worked for a month on the next round of tests for Tintin with Steven Spielberg and Peter
Jackson and the incomparable Andy Serkis. (Tintin makes my list for '09 too since we've just
started shooting the actual film).
- I started a production company, Winning Swimmer Prods., with my friend Natanya Marks. We
optioned 2 great little scripts right off the bat.
- I taught a motion capture class at The Young Actors Theatre Camp and spent 2 weeks hanging
out with 120 of the greatest, funniest, sweetest, most creative and talented kids ever.
- I went home for Christmas and got to see family and friends.
- I began a new meditation practice.
- I performed my first wedding ceremony, marrying 2 of my favorite people in the world, Matty
and Louise.
- Obama won!!!
- I produced a great documentary short that debuted at the Elevate Film Festival.
- I saw some great theatre (yes, in LA): A Chorus Line, Wicked, Little Dog Laughed, 9-5, Spring
Awakening, Stupid Kids, Seduction and Despair...
- Thanks to my friend Priscilla I spent a surreal weekend in Santa Barbara hanging out with
Kevin Costner.
- I played the bartender (twice) on one of my favorite shows, How I Met Your Mother.
- I saw a bunch of great movies.
- I got turned on to some great new bands.
- I made a comedy short and a music video with Julie Brown! (No, not "Downtown"... the one
with talent).
- I avoided jury duty.
- My friends Rob and Cat got engaged.
- My friends Jahnel and Garrett got engaged.
- I got a new agent!
- I got my first Beowulf residual check!
... oh yeah, and I turned 40.... and I make it look good!
Until next time guys and dolls!
Peace and Hugs!

2009-01-01T12:44:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year, my little fuzzy wuzzies!
On this, the first day of the greatest year of your lives (just my humble yet optimistic personal prediction) I am bringing you a new blog for a new year full of gratitude. My regular blog will continue on as usual (except I'll actually write it on a regular basis this time...again... I swear) after tomorrow. At some point I'll touch upon why I stopped writing for several months but for now suffice it to say that all is groovy in the world of Woody and I hope you are feeling the love. My gift to you on this special day is a piece written by one of my favorite people in the world, Rob Brezney. He's a amazing writer, musician, astrologer, troublemaker, part-time prophet, and all around practitioner of cool. This a piece that appears in his book Pronoia Is The Antidote For Paranoia: How The Whole World Is Conspiring To Shower You With Blessings. Hope you enjoy it. See ya soon.
Peace and Hugs!

“Glory in the Highest:

Thousands of things go right for you every day, beginning the moment you wake up. Through some magic you don’t fully understand, you’re still breathing and your heart is beating, even though you’ve been unconscious for many hours. The air is a mix of gases that’s just right for your body’s needs, as it was before you fell asleep.

You can see! Light of many colors floods into your eyes, registered by nerves that took God or evolution or some process millions of years to perfect. The interesting gift of these vivid hues comes to you courtesy of an unimaginably immense globe of fire, the sun, which continually detonates nuclear reactions in order to convert its body into light and heat and energy for your personal use.

Did you know that the sun is located at the precise distance from you to be of perfect service? If it were any closer, you’d fry, and if it were any further away, you’d freeze. Here’s another one of the sun’s benedictions: It appears to rise over the eastern horizon right on schedule every day, as it has since long before you were born.

Do you remember when you were born, by the way? It was a difficult miracle that involved many people who worked hard on your behalf. No less miraculous is the fact that you have continued to grow since then, with millions of new cells being born inside you to replace the old ones that die. All of this happens whether or not you ever think about it.

On this day, like almost every other, you have awoken inside a temperature-controlled shelter. You have a home! Your bed and pillow are soft and you’re covered by comfortable blankets. The electricity is turned on, as usual. Somehow, in ways you’re barely aware of, a massive power plant at an unknown distance from your home is transforming fuel into currents of electricity that reach you through mostly hidden conduits in the exact amounts you need, and all you have to do to control the flow is flick small switches with your fingers.

You can walk! Your legs work wonderfully well. Your heart circulates your blood all the way down to replenish the energy of the muscles in your feet and calves and thighs, and when the blood is depleted it finds its way back to your heart to be refreshed. This blessing recurs over and over again without stopping every hour of your life.

Your home is perhaps not a million-dollar palace, but it’s sturdy and gigantic compared to the typical domicile in every culture that has preceded you. The floors aren’t crumbling, and the walls and ceilings are holding up well, too. Doors open and close without trouble, and so do the windows. What skillful geniuses built this sanctuary for you? How and where did they learn their craft?

In your bathroom, the toilet is functioning perfectly, as are several other convenient devices. You have at your disposal soaps, creams, razors, clippers, tooth-cleaning accessories: a host of products that enhance your hygiene and appearance. You trust that unidentified scientists somewhere tested them to be sure they’re safe for you to use.

Amazingly, the water you need so much of comes out of your faucets in an even flow, with the volume you want, and either cold or hot as you desire. It’s pure and clean; you’re confident no parasites are lurking in it. There is someone somewhere making sure these boons will continue to arrive for you without interruption for as long as you require them.

Look at your hands. They’re astounding creations that allow you to carry out hundreds of tasks with great force and intricate grace. They relish the pleasure and privilege of touching thousands of different textures, and they’re beautiful.

In your closet are many clothes you like to wear. Who gathered the materials to make the fabrics they’re made of? Who imbued them with colors, and how did they do it? Who sewed them for you?

In your kitchen, appetizing food in secure packaging is waiting for you. Many people you’ve never met worked hard to grow it, process it, and get it to the store where you bought it. The bounty of tasty nourishment you get to choose from is unprecedented in the history of the world.

Your many appliances are working flawlessly. Despite the fact that they feed on electricity, which could kill you instantly if you touched it directly, you feel no fear that you’re in danger. Why? Your faith in the people who invented, designed, and produced these machines is impressive.

It’s as if there’s a benevolent conspiracy of unknown people that is tirelessly creating hundreds of useful things you like and need.

There’s more. Gravity is working exactly the way it always has, neither pulling on you with too much or too little force. How did that marvel ever come to be? By some prodigious, long-running accident? It doesn’t really matter, since it will continue to function with astounding efficiency whether or not you understand it.

Meanwhile, a trillion other elements of nature’s miraculous design are expressing themselves perfectly. Plants are growing, rivers are flowing, clouds are drifting, winds are blowing, animals are reproducing. The weather is an interesting blend of elements you’ve never before experienced in quite this combination. Though you may take it for granted, you relish the ever-shifting sensations of light and temperature as they interact with your body.

There’s more. You can smell odors and hear sounds and taste tastes, many of which are quite pleasing. You can think! You’re in possession of the extraordinary gift of self-awareness. You can feel feelings! Do you realize how improbably stupendous it is for you to have been blessed with that mysterious capacity? And get this: You can visualize an inexhaustible array of images, some of which represent things that don’t actually exist. How did you acquire this magical talent?

By some improbable series of coincidences or long-term divine plan, language has come into existence. Millions of people have collaborated for many centuries to cultivate a system for communication that you understand well. Speaking and reading give you great pleasure and a tremendous sense of power.

Do you want to go someplace that’s at a distance? You have a number of choices about what machines to use in order to get there. Whatever you decide—car, plane, bus, train, subway, ship, helicopter, or bike—you have confidence that it will work efficiently. Multitudes of people who are now dead devoted themselves to perfecting these modes of travel. Multitudes who are still alive devote themselves to ensuring that these benefits keep serving you.

Maybe you’re one of the hundreds of millions of people in the world who has the extraordinary privilege of owning a car. It’s a brilliant invention made by highly competent workers. Other skilled laborers put in long hours to extract oil from the ground or sea and turn it into fuel so you can use your car conveniently. The roads are drivable. Who paved them for you? The bridges you cross are potent feats of engineering. Do you realize how hard it was to fabricate them from scratch?

You’re aware that in the future shrinking oil reserves and global warming may impose limitations on your ability to use cars and planes and other machines to travel. But you also know that many smart and idealistic people are diligently striving to develop alternative fuels and protect the environment. And compared to how slow societies have been to understand their macrocosmic problems in the past, your culture is moving with unprecedented speed to recognize and respond to the crises spawned by its technologies.

As you travel, you might listen to music. Maybe you’ve got an MP3 player, a fantastic invention that has dramatically enhanced your ability to hear a stunning variety of engaging sounds at a low cost. Or maybe you have a radio. Through a process you can’t fathom, music and voices that originate at a distance from you have been converted into invisible waves that bounce off the ionosphere and down into your little machine, where they are transformed back into music and voices for you to enjoy.

Let’s say it’s 9:30 a.m. You’ve been awake for two hours, and a hundred things have already gone right for you. If three of those hundred things had not gone right—your toaster was broken, the hot water wasn’t hot enough, there was a stain on the pants you wanted to wear—you might feel that today the universe is against you, that your luck is bad, that nothing’s going right. And yet the fact is that the vast majority of everything is working with breathtaking efficiency and consistency. You would clearly be deluded to imagine that life is primarily an ordeal.

*

2008-07-05T20:35:00.000-07:00

Hello my little firecrackers!
I know it's been forever and a day since I posted a blog and for that I apologize and willingly accept your scathing remarks, chiding comments, sneers, jeers, and wet noodle lashings. Now let's move on. Since last we encountered each other here in cyberspace much has gone down both in and out of my personal orbit. We now have our presidential candidates! I'm not going to bore anyone with a political rant about who I think is the person best qualified to lead us in the right direction... except that he's not old, white, or republican. Oops! That slipped out. Sorry.

Next, we just had a birthday! Yea U.S.A.! Hope everyone's 4th was fun and safe. If you drank I hope you put on a condom before you got behind the wheel. To quote my friend Julene: "Tons of fun but safety first". I split my time between parties at my friend Josh's (born on the 4th of July) and my friend/neighbor Priscilla's. Josh provided my favorite little shot called the Face Eraser. And Pris supplied the Rock Band and beer pong. I felt like a true patriot in that by the end of the evening I was definitely seeing stars if not stripes.
One of the many things we toasted yesterday was the somewhat ironic passing earlier in the morning of former Sen. Jesse Helms. Considering all the crap he spewed over the course of his lifetime it seemed almost fitting that he die on the 4th, granting blacks, immigrants, gays and everyone else he fought so hard to oppress true independence from his ridiculous bullshit agenda. Gee, aren't you glad I didn't get political?

RANDOM "I Have A Dream" EXCERPT from the book *PRONOIA IS THE ANTIDOTE FOR PARANOIA: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings*
-By Rob Brezsny

I have a dream that in the New World, there will be a new Bill of Rights.
The first amendment will be, "Your daily wage is directly tied to the
beauty and truth and love you provide."
I have a dream that in the New World, childbirth will be broadcast in prime
time on a major TV network every night.
I have a dream that the New World will have exhilarationists, and they'll
vastly outnumber the terrorists. The exhilarationists will be performance
artists with a conscience ... charismatic improvisers who love to spring
fun surprises. They'll commit unexpected interventions and unscheduled
spectacles that delight hordes of strangers.
I have a dream that in the New World, we will add an eleventh
commandment to the standard ten: Thou shalt not bore God.
I have a dream of a week-long annual holiday called the Bacchanalia. Work
and business will be suspended so that all adults can explore their ripe
mojo with frothy erotic experiments. Tenderly orgiastic marathons will
rage unabated. Reverential ecstasy and grateful generosity will rule.
I have a dream that when anchormen report tragedies on their nightly TV
shows, they'll break down and cry and let their emotions show. No more
poker faces.
I have a dream that in the New World, plutocracy will be a felony. April
Fool's Day will come once a month. There'll be scientific horoscopes and
mystical logic. Every one of us will have at least one imaginary friend.
Compassion will be an aphrodisiac.
In the New World, we'll launch an affirmative action program that
ultimately makes most of us celebrities. Buddhist real estate developers
will build a chain of sacred shopping centers in the heartland. The CEOs of
the Fortune 500 companies will be required by law to enjoy once-a-week
sessions with Jungian psychotherapists. Pioneers in artificial intelligence
research will develop computers that can talk to God.

I also just returned from The Young Actors Theatre Camp (www.youngactorstheatrecamp.org) where I taught a motion capture acting class. It was one of the most amazing experiences I've ever had. And that includes that one time in Vegas during my friend Dave's bachelor party weekend when I... well, as they say, that shall remain in Vegas. But back to the camp. There were 120 kids ages 8-18 who converged on a YMCA campground in the Santa Cruz mountains of northern California for 2 weeks of performance arts classes running the gamut from dance, musical theatre, Shakespeare, monologue and scene work to voice and singing, filmmaking, and mocap, of course. The kids are looked after by a wonderful staff of counselors and taught by a great teaching staff as well as a host of visiting master class teachers such as singer Andrea Marcovicci, actor Dan Pintauro, casting director Josh Einsohn, Broadway choreographer Jeff Whiting, MAD TV alum Debra (Wilson) Skelton, and yours truly. In reality it was I who was the student and these amazing, talented, awe-inspiring kids who were the true "master class" teachers. I learned so much from them. I truly believe I'll be a better actor from watching them and a better person for knowing them. I highly encourage anyone in the business who can spare the time to think about attending one of these camps as a teacher or Q&A guest. You'll thank me later. I'm already planning my classes for the next session. I'll leave you with a few pics from the camp. Until next time (soon, I swear!!!).

Peace, Hugs and Grooviness!

2008-05-18T13:08:00.000-07:00

Hey guys,
I'm sure you are well aware of the horrific events which continue to occur in Myanmar following the devastating cyclones last week. There are nearly 30,000 confirmed deaths and the toll is expected to rise to nearly 50,000. In addition to the initial destruction wrought by the cyclones and subsequent flooding due to rivers being cut off by debris and dams erupting, and of course the need for food, shelter, clothing, and medical care resulting from such a disaster.
My friend Christian, a former monk who lived and studied there, is organizing a fundraiser on May 25th to help these beautiful people. Proceeds from the event will be distributed directly to where it is needed most by the monk under whom he studied. As the Chinese government is blocking traditional sources of aid to the region this will be one of the few effective means by which to actually help. Below is the e-mail he sent with all the details. Please, if you can stop by, volunteer, contribute (money or products/services) to the raffle, or participate as a sponsor or performer contact Christian at infinite_bliss@mac.com or me and I'll pass along the info. Hope everyone is doing well and I hope to see many of you on the 25th.
Peace,
Woody

Hi all my dear friends. I'm sure you've all follow the heart-breaking
news from Myanmar.
I traveled there two years ago with a Buddhist monk from Japan, so
this really hits home.
The Burmese are some the sweetest, gentlest people I've ever met.
So needless to say, I feel compelled to help, whatever way I can.

I'm helping organize a fundraising event to raise money for the
relief efforts.
The event will be held on Sunday May 25th at the Electric Lodge in
Venice.

The will be live music, art for sale, hot and cold herbal drinks,
raw chocolate, green-energy drinks, snacks, and a kick-ass Raffle!
Anyone that would like to contribute in anyway please contact us at:
Larisa: larkgallery@gmail.com
Christian: infinite_bliss@mac.com
We are looking for donations of yummy snacks, and more great items
for the raffle.

CONFIRMED LIVE MUSIC FOR EVENT:

Lisbeth Scott - singer/songwriter -
www.lisbethscott.com / www.myspace.com/biomusique

Heather Lauren - singer/songwriter -
www.heatherlauren.com / www.myspace.com/heatherlaurensong

Da Vinci - singer/songwriter – www.myspace.com/davincimusic

Kendra Kessel – singer/songwriter – www.myspace.com/kendradkessel

Jon Pearson - storyteller - www.createlearning.com

CONFIRMED ITEMS/SERVICES FOR RAFFLE
Cds from all the Artist's performing
Acupuncture treatment Jeremiah Krieger - www.easternmedicine.cn
Massage treatment - Mateo - myspace.com/teopath
Stretch Therapy/Personal training - Kendra Kessel - www.kdkfitness.com
Yoga lessons - Louise Whitehead - www.goldenbridgeyoga.com
CDs/Movie Poster - Chrisopher Young - www.officialchristopheryoung.com
Raw Bliss Chocolates - Hillary and Christian - infinite_bliss@mac.com
Green Superfood - Billy's Greens - www.billysgreens.com
Cds from all the Artist's performing plus others:
GuruGanesha, Santam Kaur

If you have something you'd like to add to the raffle, let me know!

HERBAL DRINKS:
Hot and cold herbal drinks - Dean Thomas- www.shamanshack.info
Green-energy drink - Billy's Greens - www.billysgreens.com

RAW CHOCOLATE AND MORE YUMMY SNACKS!!!
More info to follow!

If there's anything you'd like to donate for the raffle and the sale,
let me know.
If you wish to help on the 25th of May, or put up fliers/posters next
week, send out an email blast,
invite your friends and family, strangers, your extended myspace
community: forward this message on!
THANKS!!! You're all AWESOME! Any and ALL help is welcome!!! Send
your prayers for those in need.
Myanmar needs our help!

If you'd like to contribute to the in ANY other way, please let us know:
Christian at: infinite_bliss@mac.com
Or Larisa at: larkgallery@gmail.com

2008-05-16T10:44:00.000-07:00

Hey there boys and girls (and undecideds)!
It's another scorcher up in here. The mercury in my fish thermometer is topping the 100 degree mark today. They had the water misters on in front of the Trader Joe's this morning and there was a big ol' golden lab pupster parked right under neath. He had a look on his face like "shop all day, mama... I'm fine right here".
It has been a roller coaster of a week already. The leg is getting better every day and I'm starting to get around without the frankenboot, all of which is good. The other day I got a great phone call from Miss Debra Wilson (she of Mad TV fame) that was like laugh therapy for my soul. She always puts things in perspective for me and every time I speak with her I walk away feeling great about life and myself. Unfortunately, 5 minutes after our phone conversation I found myself being chased down the street by some schmuck with a gun (and a small penis, no doubt) who jumped out of his Jaguar (see: small penis) all pissed off because I wouldn't charge oncoming traffic to make a left turn. I'm not sure how getting out of his car to chase and or shoot me was going to hurry his progress but Guido the killer pimp apparently thought it would make him feel good. It did not make me feel good, though. I find it difficult to drive with adrenaline shooting out of my orifices. I lost him in traffic and all ends well. But geez!
But, then I got home to find a really lovely note from an old friend from high school reminding me of a time I helped her through a tough time back in the day. It immediately brought me back to a good place and put a smile on my face. Thanks Shari! In with the good...out with the bad. Inhale... Exhale... So simple in theory. Sometimes more difficult in practice, but getting easier.

Random Thought #1: Thomas Edison was afraid of the dark.
Talk about turning a negative in to a positive. Damn. Food for thought.

Sadly, I also found out this week that a friend passed away at far too young an age, leaving behind his wife and 2 kids. It wasn't sudden or very surprising but devastating none the less. At least he is finally at peace. Be well Mike.
One more bit of sad news. My awesome Aunt Peg, who, incidentally, is also my godmother, was diagnosed with lymphoma and begins her chemo treatment today. Light a candle, say a prayer, shoot her some rock star mojo, dance naked under the moon or whatever it is that you do to send good thoughts to those in need. I know that she would appreciate it. And speaking of appreciation, the Board of Education back in Maryland showed theirs by honoring her on Wednesday for 45 years of service in the Howard County school system. She rocks like that. Here's a picture of her and me at my grandmother's birthday a few years ago:
Random Thought #2: Most Americans would vote against the Bill of Rights if it were presented to them in a referendum. I can only assume these are the same voters that gave us 4 more years of Bush and kept Jason Castro on American Idol for so many weeks.

Speaking of politics, though, and moving on to some good news, I would be remiss if I didn't mention the fact that California is now the second state to finally crawl out of the dark ages and officially legalize gay marriage. The religious and political right (no offense to my republican friends, I love you all) are already circling the wagons to get enough signatures to place a ballot on the November elections to amend the state constitution to make it illegal for same sex couples to marry and strip millions of their equality. They are also building quite a war chest ($10 million) to fund the initiative through TV ads, newspapers, etc. Oy! What's the big deal? Gays and lesbians deserve to be just as miserable as straight married folks. And hey, if you really want to stop gay sex let 'em get married. That's usually when sex stops for the straight folks. Now there is a bad side to this ruling. Unlike Massachusetts, California has no residency requirement for obtaining a marriage license, meaning gays from around the country are likely to flock to the state to be wed. Great. Like traffic isn't bad enough already...
I just want to give a shout out to the justices who voted in favor of the decision 4-3.
In the decision, drafted by Chief Justice Ronald George, the court ruled: "In light of the fundamental nature of the substantive rights embodied in the right to marry — and their central importance to an individual's opportunity to live a happy, meaningful, and satisfying life as a full member of society — the California Constitution properly must be interpreted to guarantee this basic civil right to all individuals and couples, without regard to their sexual orientation."
OK, enough politics!

Random Thought #3: You're more likely to be killed by a champagne cork than a poisonous spider.

I'm gonna sign off and get ready to go to Molly Malone's for a night of hot music from three great singer/songwriters: Travis Howard, Austin Hanks, and Levi Kreis. Before I go, though, I want to wish a Happy Birthday to funny man Scott Ryan and my local music hero, Rob Giles. HAPPY B-DAY guys.
That's all folks! Be well... be happy... be anything you want to be.
Peace!

2008-05-11T17:40:00.000-07:00

Happy Mother's Day! For those of you who are mothers, have mothers, have had someone else's mother, or have simply been called a mother... well you get the idea. Mom's rule! I called my my mommy today (my grandma, too) and wished her the most beautiful of days. And reminded her, of course, that if it weren't for me she wouldn't have this particular honor... or the lovely lavender home spa treatment I sent her. She reminded me that if it weren't for me she would have the honor of owning a snazzier car and a house on the water and would probably have been retired by now. But "thanks for the bath salts, dear". So, I guess we're even. By the way here is a picture of my mother when she was a little girl. Adorable:

Random thought #1: Banging your head against a wall consumes 150 calories an hour.

I just realized how long it's been since I've written. You must have been terribly worried. I know how co-dependent you can be. It's really not healthy but I love you for it. Though none of you actually sent me any letters, e-mails, or faxes stating how much you missed my musings, I have no doubt that you wrote them and I appreciate your decision not to send them for fear of disturbing my privacy. As such, I shall try not to leave you dangling in breathless anticipation for so long in the future.
Now on to bigger and brighter things. My leg is healing very well. I have received the okay to start walking around without the frankenboot for small stretches and, so far, that's working well. I mainly take it off around the house and wear it only if I'm going to be out and about for long stretches. It still tends to ache if I'm on it too long.

Random Thought #2: Sleep deprivation, which has reached epidemic proportions, is akin to drug abuse in the way that it dramatically lowers competence levels and causes aberrant behavior.
Hmmmm... Maybe the Bush administration just needs to take a nap.

Yesterday, I spent the entire day at WorldFest. It's LA's largest Earth Day Festival and it was one big crunchy-granola, peace-love-harmony, warm and fuzzy, groovalicious, eco-fantastical, animal-saving, tree-hugging, tofu powered, hippy hotbed of wonderment. I was there supporting by friends at self centered, an amazing grass roots group whose goal is to inspire people to get selfcentered by spending some time each day tapping in to their authentic inner-self. I know, I know, pretty hippy dippy for a smart-ass like myself. And no I didn't drink the water and I'm not going to drink the Kool-aid either. I've been meditating for about 3 months now and it's really amazing. I just found these guys a couple of weeks ago through a good friend of mine who is a massage therapist and I really dig what they're doing. A meditation inspired revolution? Beats bombs, right? Anyway, I hope you'll check them out by clicking here.
Speaking of awards shows... What? Who said that? Wow, let's do some mental backtracking. I was thinking how much I like meditating after yoga, which is sometimes strange because for some reason yoga tends to make me horny, and then I thought well maybe that's natural... I mean some people, like Sting, do tantric yoga to increase there sexual stamina, so maybe I shouldn't ever try tantric yoga because I certainly don't need anything else putting me in the mind to make whoopie, and by the way, Whoopi just got tapped to host this year's Tony Awards... oooh, and speaking of awards shows (see, ye of little faith!), I have a friend that is nominated for an award as best new stand-up comedian. And you can help him win! Such power! And we all know that power is an aphrodisiac... oops, I digress. Where was I? Aphrodisiac, sex, power... Bill Clinton? No...oh yeah, awards! Please vote for my friend Scott Ryan by clicking on the words FREAKIN' FUNNY!
How can you be sure he's actually funny? With a website called scottryanisfunny.com he'd better be. Now, you may not know him yet but trust me on this one and just vote. Do it twice if it feels good. Besides he's a fellow Marylander (the definition of cool) and his B-day is May 16th. Send him some love and vote. It's cheaper than a card!

Random Thought #3: An Alabama court upheld a ban on the sale of vibrators, ruling that there's no constitutional right to an orgasm.

No, I'm not addicted to sex. Perhaps it's just in the air. Anyone else out there feeling the urge more than usual. Please drop me a line in solidarity or rebuttal. As long as we're talking about sex, though, let me mention some sexy music... My buddy, Rob Giles, is one of the rockingest, most talented, super sexy, groovalicious, songer-singwriters on the scene and if you are lucky enough to be in the LA area anytime soon check him out on Monday nights at Molly Malone's on Fairfax. All kinds of cool cats are dropping by to play in his sandbox, so stop by and have yourself an eargasm to start your week off right. And if you aren't yet familiar with Mr. Giles' musical stylings check him out on iTunes or on his Myspace page.

Okay cats and kittens, time to start prepping for my big week ahead. So many exciting things in store that I can hardly wait to get to them so I can blog it out for you. You're welcome. Ha! Have a great week. You know I love you all. Now spread it around. Word to your mutha...
Peace and hugs!

2008-04-28T22:38:00.000-07:00

Hola Amigos!
Boy did we have a hot time in the old town this weekend. Temperature-wise, at least. Holy crap. The car next to me got stuck at the traffic light when his tires melted to the street. I saw a bald man fry an egg on his head! Did I mention it was hot? So, we here at the Fredonia compound circled the wagons and threw us a backyard BBQ. Fun was had by one and all. Some of us had more fun than others. I do believe I glimpsed a 7am walk of shame this morning. And coming from my very own house! Apparently, karaoke and a dash of strawberry sour diesel is quite the aphrodisiac.
By the way, thank you to everyone who sent get well wishes. I'm feeling better every day and the walking boot is helping. As did the pitcher of mojitos yesterday. A bunch of you have asked to see the infamous boot so I've included a couple of pics. One showing the Frankenboot, the other showing my bruised up leg. Mind you the bruises are all from blood rushing to the torn muscle. I never hit the leg at all. Weird.

See... y'all thought I was kidding. That I was just taking vicodin for fun. Well, a couple of times it was for fun. By the way, not for nothing but not a single person associated with the film I was working on when I hurt myself has so much as called, e-mailed, sent a text, or anything to see how I'm doing. Seriously. Not a word since I left set to drive myself to the emergency room. This the same film I've been working on since November of 2006. Not a producer, an AD, production assistant, no one. Hollywood... Ain't it great? :-)

Random Thought #1: Hundreds of years ago, it was seemingly possible to buy forgiveness. Until Martin Luther came along to spoil the fun, the Catholic Church used to sell "indulgences," which buyers could supposedly trade in purgatory for a reduced punishment for their earthly sins.

In other news: After 3 months, the landlord finally sent someone to take a look at the living room floor that had swollen and pushed itself up in to what could only be described as something out of tremors. Seriously, I was waiting for a giant sandworm to break through and spit out Kevin Bacon on to my floor. Now we have holes where our floor and walls used to be. Fun.In case you hadn't guessed, I figured out how to add photos to my blog. Maybe not a big deal to you but I personally feel a huge sense of accomplishment. Next stop... VIDEO!

Random Thought #2: Sanity is the new Crazy. Shadow work, meditation, yoga, contemplation, prayer, authentic self inquiry. SANITY is the new Crazy."

Okie dokie, my little pound puppies. Time for me to hit the sack. Big days ahead. More news to come. Exciting things just around the corner. Stay tuned. Stay true. Stay weird.
Peace!

2008-04-20T15:25:00.000-07:00

Hey there, my little blog-babies!
First of all, happy belated Earth Day! To celebrate I shut off my brain to conserve energy. I also recycled a lot of jokes and ate only organic prescription drugs. No, I'm not a druggie. I have a legit excuse... this time. I tore my calf muscle last week while at work on Avatar. No, I'm not kidding. I'm still working on Avatar. I know we were supposed to wrap last July. But conveniently, they were able to reissue the same memo espousing a wrap date by simply changing the 2007 to 2008. Sort of like Bush's memo about the proposed Iraq withdrawal date.
By the way, regarding my injury, Captain Jim of the S.S. Avatar was mightily impressed by my utter inability to run from point A to point B without hurting myself in a major way. Honestly, so was I. How does someone run a marathon only to crap out jogging across a film set? Getting old ain't for sissies. I sat around the set for about an hour with an icepack strapped to my leg fishing for sympathy and praying it was just a charlie-horse. Finally, I asked to go to the ER because that's always fun. They said fine, but told me to keep my make-up on in case I was deemed okay to come back and finish out the day. I was touched by their confidence and was sure it came from a desire for me to be fine and not from the fear that they had wasted a day's pay on a defective avatar. As it turns out I wasn't able to finish out the day but everyone in the hospital was quite amused by the green dots all over my face.
I was on crutches for a few days but got to trade the walking sticks in for a stylish black Frankenstein boot. Sweet. Hopefully, I'll only have to sport this particular look for a few more weeks. Meanwhile, it's all about vicodin and worker's comp. In a further bit of mocap news, I got the call on Thursday that I'm officially on board for Tintin, the new Steven Spielberg film. We start shooting on August 18th here in LA. The test shoots we did in February were a blast so I'm very excited for the film to start.

Random thought:
"What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly." - Chuang Tse

While we're still on the subject of work... It's official. My partner Natanya and I registered our production company this week. Winning Swimmer Productions has officially launched. I'll let y'all know when we get the website up and running and you can check out the projects we're developing.

You may notice a little something new to the right of the blog. My friend Linda, learned me how to rig this jalopy so that you can subscribe to my blog by RSS (whatever that is) or simply enter your e-mail and be automatically notified when I update my blog. How's that for convenience? Now you don't have to check in everyday with your hopes up only to have them dashed by the absence of new and titillating Woodyisms. You're welcome. Also, I corrected my settings to allow everyone to comment, not just those with blog accounts.
I've always been about inclusion, after all! Except for ugly people. I'm kidding. Ugly people are fine. As long as they aren't poor. Or unless their name is Betty. She's cool. And I don't love smokers. Or people who wear furs. Or furry people. Also, not a fan of people who drive Hummers, people who pop their collars, people who wear dog collars, dogs wearing clothes, cats that steal your breath while you're sleeping, and traffic. Especially, traffic caused by someone driving 12 miles an hour talking on their cell phone. I'm also not in to black licorice. I'm not being racist. My own mother eats it and I'm fine with that. Okay, it's entirely possible that my evening vicodin has kicked in. I'll be signing off now before I say something I really mean. :-o Until next time...
Peace and grooviness!

2008-04-13T13:24:00.000-07:00

Hey there my little funky cold medinas!
Hope everyone is livin' large on this fine Sunday. I don't know what the weather is wherever it is that may be be dwelling at present but it is hot as hell here in LaLa Land! It's not Africa hot but definitely hot enough to do a little crotch pot cookin'.
I was invited to go to Disneyland with some friends of mine (as opposed to say some random stranger on the street saying, "Hey dude! Wanna go to Disneyland?") but I couldn't even pretend to be interested. The crowds, the heat, the..., the..., the crowds, the heat. Last thing I need is to pay a small fortune to be around a bunch of sweaty strangers all up in my grill, making me wish I was living in the future and packing a hidden arsenal of retroactive birth control sprays that I could use at my own discretion. Plus, I was a mascot for the Super Bowl many years ago (Dallas Cowboy in case you were curious) and my heart would break at the thought of how friggin' miserable every one of those minimum wage earning plushie freaks pretending to be Mickey, Goofy, Daisy, or the ambiguously gay chipmunks, Chip 'N' Dale must be. And they can't even talk. They can't scream. They can't whisper to a passer-by "If I don't get out of this fucking fur coat in the next 2 seconds I'm going to drop kick the next brat that pulls on my tale or tries to stick their pretzel in my my mouth." Especially Chip 'N' Dale who just want to be poolside with their daiquiris or in their air conditioned tree watching America's Next Top Chipmunk. My point is it's hot.
Speaking of hot, I had a blast yesterday working with that firecracker of a funny lady, Julie Brown. It was more fun than I've had on set in a long time. No offense, Mr. Cameron. What a great reminder of how fun it is to just pick up a camera and do something on your own. I forgot how much fun we all used to have doing Strip Mall for Comedy Central back in the day.

Random Thought: Pablo Picasso had a difficult birth. When he finally popped out after a long
labor, he wasn't breathing. The midwife decided his face was so blue he'd
be impossible to revive. She declared him dead and left. But Picasso's
uncle, who was in attendance, got up close to the infant and puffed cigar
smoke up his nose. The shock brought him back to life.

I don't know what that has to do with the price of tea in China but I like it. Speaking of China (how's that for a segue, boys and girls?), What is up with the Olympic torch? Enough already. Yes, I like the pomp and circumstance of the Olympics and I love a good show of tradition as much as the next guy but can we just call it quits already. China sucks for not freeing Tibet or doing something about Darfur. But putting the flame out as some random runner jogs by with the torch will not automatically free Tibet. If you want to make a statement leave the torch alone and instead refuse to buy another single thing that comes from China. Go ahead. Try it. It's like giving up sugar. Once you try you realize that shit is EVERYWHERE. Also, since we are talking torch here, does anyone realize what a huge carbon footprint that giant match is leaving on its long trek home. It has teams of security with a fleet of cars, its own jet, its own hotel rooms, boats, buses, vans, food for all the personnel, the news vans, helicopters, etc. that are tracking its progress. Give me a break. Let's just e-mail a picture of the thing around the world and call it a day.

Random Thought #2: The U.S. Labor Department periodically analyzes the volunteer work done by Americans. In one report, it estimated that between September 2001 and September 2002, 59 million people offered their services free of charge as they mentored, tutored, built affordable housing, cleaned up the environment, and helped respond to community emergencies. The average contribution per person for the year was 52 hours. (Source:
Associated Press)

Way to go volunteer type peoples! Keep up the good work. Everybody now!
Until next time.... be groovy... be kind... be freaky... be yourself!
Peace!

2008-04-12T07:55:00.000-07:00

Hey Y'all!
Happy Saturday to you. First of all, I've been up since 5 am for no good reason. I woke with a headache which I think has something to do with grinding my teeth in my sleep and which I'm in total denial about. Let's face it, who wants to wear a night guard. When I think night guard I think head gear and I have flashbacks to Joan Cusack in Sixteen Candles trying to drink from the water fountain at the school dance. Funny as hell, but not when it's you. Although, I'll probably break down and get one for the sake of my teeth. I mean what's worse, wearing a night guard or unknowingly grinding my teeth down to nubs and looking like an Appalachian hillbilly for the rest of my life? No offense to my undoubtedly large Appalachian readership. At least the two of you who can read. But then again you probably don't have access to the "internets" so screw it.
For anybody out there who watched Idol Gives Back because I mentioned it... my apologies. It was pretty boring and unspectacular this year. Annie Lennox aside. She, as usual, was amazing. Bono is still in the running for saint. Carrie Underwood should treat George Michael songs the same way Ryan Seacrest treats David Archuleta: Admire from a distance but do not touch! Still, the evening was for a good cause and I hope they raised a lot of money.

Random Rant: I can't stand people who have their Myspace pages so friggin' tricked out that it takes about a day and a half to load. What with the Slide pics, the dancing wallpaper, the 6 videos embedded from Youtube, their top 64 friends, the 100 song music player, and the animated flash icon of themselves, who has time to bother? I was going to send you a message inviting you to a really cool party in the hills but it ended 2 hours ago while I was waiting for your page to load. And when it finally did...TACKY!

Today is going to be so much fun. I'm shooting a short film with Miss Julie Brown. No, not "Downtown Julie Brown" (wubba wubba), the one with talent. Miss Earth Girls Are Easy, Just Say Julie, Strip Mall Julie Brown. She wrote a hilarious sort of E! send-up called "The Art Of Being Fabulous" in which she hosts an infotainment show about "fabulous" celebs. In the first episode she follows Paula Abdul as she gets ready for the Grammys. Did I mention she's also playing Paula. Yeah I know. Love it. I'm playing Paula's stressed out make-up artist. It'll be up on Youtube soon. I'll let y'all know. And no, I won't be posting it on my Myspace page! But I'm sure it will be on Julie's. :-)
That's all for my morning blog. My headache is gone, thanks for asking. By the way if you want to hear some good music I just helped my friend Brian Kinler set up his Myspace music page. He's a wicked good piano player from New Orleans. If you're in the LA area you should catch his show in a couple of weeks at Vitello's in Studio City. All the info is on his page. Check out his music (including some great live concert videos) here.
Have a groovy weekend. Catch y'all later.
Peace!

2008-04-08T18:53:00.000-07:00

Wow, so apparently these things don't write themselves. Although I'm off to a less than illustrious start, please bear with me while I adjust to the pressure of regular communication with the masses. And by masses I mean the 3 of you reading this. Providing that I've actually taken that all important step of informing people that this blog exists. At the present moment that hasn't happened. I was trying to decide if this was going to be a weekly update or a when the mood struck me kind of thing. As best I can tell it's going to be the latter but never longer between posts than the former.

For those who are curious about the status of my entertainment pursuits I have a few updates. First, my participation in all things Avatar has come to a grinding halt for the moment. Sadly, so have the paychecks. I'm told I'll have another day's work next week but they told me that this week and last week, too. They LIE!!! Sorry. I'm a little sensitive as I just paid rent and it was raised this month.
Second, I'm moving forward with the launch of my new (as yet untitled) production company with my beautiful, talented (and single, guys!) partner Natanya. On that front we just optioned our first script to produce. Woohoo! Yea us! We're also hoping to convince the equally beautiful and talented (don't know the dating status) Emily Wolfe to be our partner in the company. She's an amazing person with enough business savvy to run 3 companies. I can't think of a better person to be the trois in our little menage of a film company.
Third, I'm making slow but steady progress on my internet talk show, Hooray For Hollywoody. I've been speaking with web tech guys about the set-up, hosting, etc. I've mostly learned that I'm old and easily confused by technology. So if there's anyone out there who can and would care to help out with the set-up I'm eternally grateful in advance.

As for the personal stuff...mind your own business. I mean nothing too new. Unless I haven't spoken to you in a very long time. Then, lots to catch up on. Mainly, I made it through puberty. I'm now 6'2" and, despite a false start, incredibly handsome and charismatic. Some have even said smoldering. I think they were talking about my looks and not my odor. Whatever. I'm quite successful and wealthy beyond my wildest dreams. Unfortunately I haven't been able to convince the imaginary leprechaun I call Fred to tell me where my wealth is hidden so for now I live the life of a struggling artist as not to rub my monetary good fortune in the faces of my friends or entice family members to re-establish contact. Also, poor is sexy. Additionally, and much to the shame of my parents, I came out... as a democrat. Even worse, I brought home a black candidate. They'll get over it. I think that pretty much brings us up to the present. If you think I left anything out or you have any questions just ask. My life is an open blog.

Eventually, I'll be doctoring the site up with the occasional video, pictures, links, or other extremely relevant doodads, thing-a-ma-bobs, bells and whistles. Until then you'll have to be dazzled by my witty dribble. Hope everyone is having the grooviest of weeks and continue to do so. I'm off to watch American Idol. Shut up it makes me happy. And tomorrow, of course is Idol Gives Back: The Sequel. Nothing does my heart so good as to watch Simon swat the African mosquitoes from his cleavage whilst smiling at the starving masses who have no idea who he is because they don't have a TV. Or electricity. Or food... Seriously, though, if you do watch please give. Also, if you're not already a member of the ONE campaign click here to find out more and sign up. Bono and I will love you for it.
Peace!

2008-03-28T22:22:00.000-07:00

Hey there current and future fans! (All 3 of you)
This is the first post of my new blog. You may not remember my old blog because I created it and then never posted to it or let anyone know it existed. I have decided to make another go of it in an attempt to:
a) force myself to write on a regular basis
b) keep my family and friends (a.k.a. fan club members... just go with it) abreast of my life
c) foster the illusion that people out there value my opinions and crave an outlet in which said
opinions can be shared and saved for posterity
I have no specific plans for the blog so future posts could consist of anything from reporting my daily routine, sharing new work prospects, political or social rants, a new favorite band, an Oprah quote, or just a link to someone else's blog that actually has something to say. Whatever it is and whatever it becomes I hope it entertains and informs or at least dies trying. Along the way I hope it also inspires and pisses off readers in equal proportion. Enjoy (or not) and by all means please leave your comments so I know you're out there and what you're thinking. It's all about the exchange. Peace!