Hoping to Adopt Blog

Open Adoption Roundtable: Naming

Robyn C — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 16:09:09 +0000

This week's Open Adoption Roundtable topic is:

Write about names/naming and open adoption.

When you adopt, naming isn't necessarily straightforward. You have many choices:

Keep the name the child's birthparents (or other caregivers) gave him. Keep a portion of the name the child's birthparents gave him, but add a name of your own. Change the child's name entirely. Name the child in conjunction... more

Parents Wanted

Robyn C — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 13:20:25 +0000

On my online adoption group, we sometimes get messages like this one (which is completely made up):

28 y/o CC expectant mother looking for open adoption with a married couple. No drinking/drugs. Birth father unknown, could be AA or CC. Gender unknown. Due September 26.

One woman, who is new to the group and to domestic adoption, asked about the validity of such messages. She also asked why there were so many of these situations, which she dubbed "Parents Wanted". These are two very good questions.

First, the validity of the posts. There... more

Why Should You Be Concerned?

Jenna Hatfield — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 17:31:37 +0000

Robyn just posted a great write-up about an article that dives into the serious concerns regarding ethical adoption in the United States. Or, rather, the current state of unethical adoptions in the United States. The sad fact is that agencies and attorneys are not always acting in ethical manners or with the best interest of the expectant family in their mind. All too often, they're more concerned with the final outcome, that being placement which puts more money in their pocket.

But why should you be concerned with how agencies are treating... more

Bonding Tools: A Sling

Jenna Hatfield — Sun, 30 Aug 2009 18:23:19 +0000

As you prepare to adopt, you have likely researched the importance of bonding with your child. In fact, that's an important thing whether you give birth or adopt your child. Bonding is of vital importance. There are many theories as to how to go about such a thing, especially with a newborn. One of the easiest ways, in my experience, is to employ the use of a sling.

No, I'm not talking about putting your arm in a sling. I'm talking about a baby carrier, something that holds your baby close to you without your baby being in your arms. There have been those... more

What If You're a Little "Crunchy"?

Robyn C — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 13:23:35 +0000

From the Urban Dictionary:

crunchy Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

What brought this on? A friend of mine took a "How much of a crunchy mom are you?" Facebook quiz. The quiz focused on "Attachment Parenting", which espouses... more

Timeline

Robyn C — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 13:07:35 +0000

Tomorrow, August 25, is Jack's Adoption Day. It's the day that we stood in front of a judge in Missouri and were officially made a "forever family". I'm going to write more details about that tomorrow, on the US Infant Adoption blog. Today, I'm answering a very frequently asked question:

How long did it take you to adopt?

I now present our adoption timeline.

July 2002: Husband and I are married. We agree not to even think about kids for a year, to get used to being married.

January 2003:... more

Hoping Again

Robyn C — Fri, 14 Aug 2009 13:11:43 +0000

The title of this blog - "Hoping to Adopt" - somehow implies adopting for the first time. However, those who are adopting for the second or third, or even eighth time are also "hoping".

No two adoptions are alike. I feel that the phrase "typical adoption" is a misnomer - there is no such beast. You can't talk about the "typical" birthmother, because what most people think of as "typical" is actually "stereotypical" (but that's another post).

The first time we adopted, I did two years of research. We signed with an entity that we thought would guarantee us... more

And Knowing is Half the Battle!

Jenna Hatfield — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 14:13:20 +0000

Yes, I did just quote the old school GI Joe cartoon in the title of this post. Why? Knowing is half the battle! In just about any situation, knowing what your up against can help you figure out what path you should follow in order to achieve your desired goal. It applies to adoption in many ways.

1. Knowing what situation best fits your family. As you research what adoption methods work best for your family, you may be overwhelmed with the many avenues you could explore. Will foster adoption be a good fit for your family? Is international adoption a direction... more

Little Things to Help You Afford Adoption

Jenna Hatfield — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 17:51:57 +0000

The economy isn't all that kind to those who are are considering adoption. While I have not heard that the price of adopting has risen, the amount of money we have at our disposal has certainly changed for the vast majority of us. Even those who have been steadfast in their saving and made smart financial decisions over the years may be feeling some anxiety about the economy. We all have to buy groceries!

With all of this in mind, perhaps you're wondering how you're going to fund an adoption if you do choose this path of building your family. While many... more

What to Talk About In a "Match Meeting"

Robyn C — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 13:25:54 +0000

If you're pursuing a private, domestic infant adoption, you will likely "match" with expectant parents before the baby is born. This usually involves a meeting with an expectant mother. That meeting may take place in person or over the telephone. Your agency will likely be involved in facilitating the conversation. A common question from prospective adoptive parents: What do I talk about in a match meeting?

I can tell you what not to do - follow the instructions my agency gave me. Even before I knew all the proper terms and tried to really think about what expectant and birth... more