Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men

Valentine's, Boobies and Planned Parenthood

2012-02-14T08:00:00.000-07:00

Today is Valentine's Day. A day to recognize and celebrate those we love.

Today I have an appointment to get my annual Mammogram, which will be covered by my excellent health insurance.

And today I made a contribution to Planned Parenthood's general fund.

In my mind, these things just naturally follow each other.

Why my ladybrain should prevent my serving in a combat role

2012-02-13T08:00:00.000-07:00

"I think that could be a very compromising situation, where people naturally may do things that may not be in the interest of the mission because of other types of emotions that are involved. It already happens, of course, with the camaraderie of men in combat, but I think it would be even more unique if women were in combat." - Rick Santorum, Cankerous Choad and anti-feminist

I have a confession to make.

Rick's absolutely correct. My ladybrain does, in fact, make me completely unsuitable for the military life:

It prevented me from learning the both the technical and military skills that were required for me to be an effective Radioman.*
It prevented me from maintaining good order and discipline in my division.*
It prevented me from waking up every morning with an attitude that my current rank would be my last rank, and behaving appropriately to ensure my sailors and ship always received my best efforts.*
It prevented me from planning my pregnancy to ensure the needs of my family and the needs of the Navy would conflict to the smallest extent possible.* **
It prevented me from making considered and defensible decisions about my sailors and my duties, even in high stress situations.*
It prevented me from achieving the required qualifications for my billet and rank, including the Enlisted Surface Warfare Specialist.*
It negatively affected my male shipmates' ability to perform their duties, because they were too concerned about me, delicate flower that I am.*

I propose a scientific experiment. Let's put Rick Santorum in a cage fight with any active duty military woman who is currently serving in a combat role - any service - and see how their ladybrain affects the outcome. Yeah.

________________
*Not intended to be a factual statement.

**Why, yes, my birth control was in fact provided and paid for by the U.S. taxpayer, the entire time I was on active duty. Horrors! Communism! Socialism! Stalinism! Violation of Freedom of Religion!

Free Shit Friday Winner...

2012-02-12T08:00:00.000-07:00

...of the snap together Trebuchette is Thordr, with a random number of 20.

Thordr, I'll get that in the mail when I damn well feel like it. As evidenced by the tardiness of the last trebuchette delivery.

2012 Flower Pr0n - Hawai'i!

2012-02-11T08:00:00.000-07:00

Free Shit Friday - Mechanicky Edition

2012-02-10T08:00:00.000-07:00

The Mechanicky Gal is here! So to celebrate, I'm giving away another Snap Together Trebuchette from E&M Labs, makers of Siege Toys.

Because it's mechanicky, you see.

Da rules.

Completely Out of Control

2012-02-09T08:00:00.000-07:00

The Mechanicky Gal is coming! She's coming tonight!

That's right - it's going to be a fun filled weekend full of junk food, spa attendence and shopping.* And here is the initial haul from the grocery. Please note that other alcoholic beverages are out of frame, as they are chilling in the refrigerator.

Yes, we are completely out of control. Especially since I apparently forgot to purchase Mojito ingredients and we'll have to make an additional stop on the way home from the airport.

______________

*Except for the part where The Mechanicky Gal and I both have managed to contract some sort of bug. Stupid biology.

Finally!

2012-02-08T08:00:00.000-07:00

I suspect I may be entering menopause. We will now pause so the gentlemen can run, run, run away.

I'll spare you the gory details of my symptoms, but I have to say, it's about bloody time. I've been struggling with my reproductive health for years, which has included such delights as crippling back pain, chronic anemia, and occasional insanity.

I asked my GYN to schedule a hysterectomy, but she narrow-mindedly informed me that it wasn't yet necessary and put me on mild HRT to stop my periods. But now symptoms are reappearing, and I feel like calling her and demanding, "Now? How about now? Will you rip it out NOW?"

Sista from Another Mista The Mechanicky Gal tells me that I can now blame ALL MY PROBLEMS on menopause. EVERY SINGLE ONE. Shredded tires. Sudden death. Forgetfulness. An inability to exhibit any kind of patience.

I know some women dread menopause, and consider it a burden to be managed. Me? I've been looking forward to this shit for years, years, and CAN'T WAIT.

Fitbit Review and other Fitness-Related Geekery

2012-02-07T08:00:00.000-07:00

I tend towards a bit of OCD, especially as it relates to fitness and diet. I'm pretty conscientious about recording what I eat, how much I exercise, and how those things affect my body.

So when the website I use to manage those things (www.myfitnesspal.com) announced that they would now integrate with Fitbit, I decided to buy one and give it a whirl.

The device itself if very unobtrusive, and slides right onto my bra with no discomfort. This totally works for me, as I am at an age where bra usage is never, ever optional. I have no idea how secure it is when clipped to pants or a belt, although it did come with a little belt clip.

What it is

It's an excellent pedometer. It not only counts the number of steps you take, but also the number of stairs you climb, and reports on everything. For someone like me who loves, loves, loves to examine and manage data, this is very appealing.
It's a good tool to determine your daily caloric needs (exclusive of targeted aerobic exercise - more on that later). By wearing it all the time, even while sleeping, I get a much better idea of how many calories I burn on a daily basis, since it monitors and reports on my actual incidental activity. For me, this tends to be far more accurate than the Harris Benedict Equation.
If you need help managing your sleep, this might be helpful. After eleven years of chronic insomnia, I tend to be hyper-aware of my sleep patterns, but if you're tired and don't know why, this might help.


The Sleep Tracker from a rare night of excellent, uninterrupted sleep.

The Sleep Tracker from a more typical night.

What it isn't

It's not a heart rate monitor. If your preferred aerobic activity involves anything but walking or running, this product will not give you an accurate representation of your activity. That's not necessarily a criticism - it's not what the device was designed for. But if you want an accurate measurement of what's going on with your body when you engage in non-impact aerobic exercise or strength training, you'll need to invest in a heart rate monitor, as well. Don't count on the integrated calorie counters in the machines you use, or the database values. I use the Polar FT4, but there are many affordable, accurate choices.
I think the food tracking component of the Fitbit website is inferior to the one I use over at MyFitnessPal. The main reason for this opinion is that MFP offers a Mobile App (rather than a mobile website), and I find the app much more user friendly and manageable. I like the daily activity reports over at Fitbit better than the ones over at MFP, though:

All in all, a worthwhile investment.

Things I (Re) Learned this Weekend

2012-02-06T08:00:00.000-07:00

When a congregant from a Southern Baptist Church passes away, the organizational structure of the church goes into action to support the family like a well-oiled machine. This just reinforced my opinion that while I will never be able to wrap my head around the belief systems of people of faith, churches themselves are often institutions that have value from a community and support perspective. And I'm very glad that they will be there for my Uncle once the extended family has all gone home.
______________

I'm really, really grateful that my extended family consists of people who are anxious to support and help one another when we need it most.
______________

Toward the end of my Auntie's life, I became closer to her through the technology that is social networking. This makes me happy.
______________

Some people are just broken. When that's the case, the only thing for it is to forgive them the hurt their fundamental character flaw caused me, cut them from my life, and mourn the loss of the relationship.*
______________

My Auntie was an amazing, wonderful human being, and me and my family are still struggling with the fundamental unfairness of her early death. It's hard to understand why the universe would choose her when there are so many heinous fucksticks around who would be so much more deserving. While my intellect realizes such railing is counterproductive and has no basis in reality, it's hard to manage the emotional reaction.
______________

While I recognize that Christians believe that my Auntie's faith means that she'll receive an eternal reward, I'm happier reflecting on her remembrance as a wonderful human being due to her acts in this world. My Auntie rocked, and that's good enough for me.
______________

It makes me happy to have told stories and laughed until my stomach and head hurt following my Auntie's service. I'm quite sure she would have heartily approved.
______________

My Hot Cousins should not be allowed out without adult supervision. Yes, I am looking at you, Nanny Weezah and Escalator Girl.
______________

This is my Auntie's youngest grandchild and his fabulous mother. The youngster decided this weekend that "walking" was his new favorite method of locomotion, which reminded me that while I spent a lot of this weekend hating the circle of life, it's also the natural order of things.

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*This revelation had nothing to do with my Auntie's funeral or anyone who attended. It was an epiphany that occurred on the plane coming home.

Remembering my Auntie

2012-02-01T08:00:00.000-07:00

The last time I saw her - our family reunion last year.

I can't believe you're gone.

I suppose that's always the case when someone passes away suddenly and without warning. The shock of the event hits the observers like a punch in the stomach, leaving us gasping, in pain, uncertain what to do in order to get our breath back.

So we cry, and in the tradition of our family, we cry together, because no one cries alone in our presence.

By most measures, you led a perfectly ordinary life. You married young, selecting your mate wisely and well the first time out of the gate (unlike most of the women in our family). You quickly had two children. You moved often, depending on your husband's military assignment. You participated in your community wherever you went. You gained your own professional skills.

But you were anything but ordinary.

No one told a story like you. The lines around your eyes and mouth were a testament to how often you laughed, and how joyfully. You lived a life of service, volunteering to help in your sons' school activities, teaching vacation bible school, visiting the old folks at the nursing home. You relished your role as a Grandma, rejoicing in each expansion to your family.

I remember how angry you were after 9/11. I couldn't understand it at first, until I thought about it. After a lifetime of your husband's deployments to the very region that spawned the terrorists, you saw the loss of life on that day as a loss to your family. And family meant everything to you.

Your faith was a cornerstone in your life. You took the lessons of your church to heart, trying to live your life generously, with compassion, and love. You were never sanctimonious about it, and you never made me feel like you loved me less because I didn't share your belief.

Do you remember when you told me that it's better to be kind than truthful? I do, and while I still struggle with that lesson, I try to remember it and follow your example.

Do you remember when I told you that I thought your kids had grown into fine men, and you told me that the credit was theirs and not yours? I do, and I apply that lesson with my own kids.

Do you remember when you won one of the prizes in my Summer Reading Program? You were so excited to have WON, and your enthusiasm reminded me that even the smallest victories can enhance our daily lives.

With your example, you taught me that people of good conscience can disagree about even the most fundamental things, but still remain partners in this life, supporting and loving one another as members of the same tribe.

My heart is breaking for your family. Your husband, my beloved Uncle, married you when he was 19 years old. He's never really been an adult without you by his side, and I imagine how lost and alone he must be feeling. My cousins, both decent and good men, have lost their mother, and their children their Grandmother.

I don't know what happens to us when we die. Really, no one knows for sure. But I hope desperately that wherever you are, your light continues to shine, and you can experience peace in knowing that you've left this world in better shape than your found it. But I'm selfish enough to want you to have stayed in this world longer. We're a poorer place without you, and I will love and miss you, all the days of my life.

2012 Flower Pr0n - Hawai'i!

2012-01-28T08:00:00.000-07:00

Boogie Blogging Friday - Blankie Edition

2012-01-27T08:00:00.000-07:00

Blankie! I have a BLANKIE!

On Being Charitable

2012-01-26T08:00:00.000-07:00

So I was having a conversation over on Facebook yesterday with my good friend NeuronDoc on the topic of that leprous toad Joe Paterno, and she made a rather telling comment related to people's desire to be charitable:

"Donating money to charities is not a good deed. Oh, fine, donating money to worthwhile causes is laudable, but I don't consider it a good deed. Running a soup kitchen is a good deed."

NeuronDoc is, of course, absolutely correct, and her observation made me hang my head in shame.

I support a large number of charities. I love, love, love Kiva. I support DonorsChoose every year. I support my various friends and family members when they participate in charitable endeavors such as "Walking for a Cure." I try to be generous with my disposable income. But I'm woefully short on good deeds. And this does not move me forward in my desire to be a mensch.

The fact that I donate a portion of my disposable income is not a good deed. It's disposable, and so by definition, I won't really miss it. It doesn't really cost me anything in terms of sacrifice, and while the outcomes of my donations are positive, it doesn't really say much about me personally. My disposable income is a renewable resource.

A true mensch is someone who donates and sacrifices things that are not renewable. Things like time. To use NeuronDoc's example, someone who spends hours each week running a soup kitchen for the least among us has donated something that they'll never, ever get back, or get more of. My piddly donations to the various charities I like does not compare, and I would do well to kill my internal self-congratulatory smugness at my "generosity." I'm not generous in the way I'd like to be, although my donations might be labeled "laudable."

NeuronDoc reminded me of an important truth. Helping others should not be the antiseptic act of simply writing a check. It should be a much more personal affair. A fact I shall try to keep at the top of my mind moving forward.

Behold, My WorldCon 70 Boots

2012-01-25T08:00:00.000-07:00

You may commence your envy.

In which my engineering brain takes me 'round the bend

2012-01-24T08:00:00.000-07:00

So I was at the gym this morning, and as I was starting my power walk I noticed my heart rate monitor was having some trouble. The receiver, which I wear on my wrist, was not getting a signal from the transmitter, which I wear around my chest. I'm sure the issue is simply a matter of replacing the battery in the transmitter, but it would be FAR TOO SIMPLE for me to leave it at that. So as I'm tooling around the indoor track, I had this internal monologue:

Me: Well, that's a bummer. I'll have to see if I can find time to pick up a new battery.

Engineering Brain (EB): But what about TODAY? You won't have any measurements for TODAY.

Me: I wonder what size it takes?

EB: Why are we still walking? There's no point in continuing if we can't MEASURE.

Me: What?

EB: We must MEASURE. Everything must be MEASURED.

Me: What the fuck are you talking about?

EB: If you don't MEASURE it, it doesn't COUNT.

Me: Of course it counts. You see me walking.

EB: But there's no MEASUREMENT.

Me: I can use the measurement from the last time I power-walked for 30 minutes until I can get a new battery. No biggie.

EB: NO BIGGIE? You plan on replicating data and it's NO BIGGIE?

Me: I think you're getting a bit...obsessive...about all this. Now that I have baseline data for my activities, maybe I should just use those data points.

EB: It's like I don't even know you anymore.

Me: I'm just kidding. Our new FitBit will arrive tomorrow. Then you'll have whole new worlds of obsessive measurement to keep you busy.

EB: FitBit! Yay!

Broken. I think my brain is broken...

Other People Are Not Idiots

2012-01-23T08:00:00.000-07:00

So I was reading an entry in a blog I really like, and the author indicated that he and his wife were trying to adopt a new attitude about other people. He called the theory "Other People Are Not Idiots," and it basically posits that "Other people are not idiots. They have reasons for doing what they do and standing by the things they stand by."

This gave me pause.

I have a tendency towards intellectual elitism. It's not becoming, I know, and I continuously struggle with it. But the fact of the matter is that I often fail in my efforts to place a higher value on human attributes that are under the control of the individual. I often assume that other people are idiots, and so become a purveyor of snobbish and cynical arrogance.

My failure to correct this aspect of my life benefits no one, least of all me. I don't want to become a bitter old woman, constantly angry, constantly holding others in contempt because they fail to see - and value - the world in the same way that I do. Such an attitude implies a stunning failure of empathy on my part, not to mention being inherently unkind.

So I've decided to make a concerted effort to be more mindful and more empathic towards the viewpoints and beliefs of others. There's a reason they disagree with me. There's a reason they may interpret specific events differently than me. There's a reason they may choose not to embrace new ideas or change their minds about old ones.

The challenge, of course, is discovering those reasons, and trying to see the world from their point of view in light of those reasons. Often people (including me) can't articulate the reasons for a specific belief, and become defensive if asked to defend their position. So I must learn to tread lightly, instead of approaching such matters like a bull in a china shop, as is my custom.

Repeat after me: Other people are not idiots. They have reasons for doing what they do and standing by the things they stand by. It's not fair to label someone an idiot without having a full understanding of their thought process and reasons for the conclusion. If I don't agree, it's my responsibility to bridge that gap.

It's only fair.

2012 Flower Pr0n - Hawai'i!

2012-01-22T08:00:00.000-07:00

The Joy of Diversity...and Hope

2012-01-21T08:00:00.000-07:00

As I've mentioned before, the community in which I live is not very diverse. The property values are high, the schools are excellent, and there's not much in the way of affordable housing. These things tend to conspire to make Parker a haven for conservative, middle class Whitey McWhiterson families. This has always bothered me about my community, as such homogeneous demographics mean our priorities as a community tend to be very narrow and structured. When the Smart Twins were participating in intramural sports, the teams and the spectators were a sea of white faces. White, white and more white. When my son played baseball one season, I don't recall a single child of color who played in his league. Same deal at the pool when my daughter took swimming lessons. We moved here because of the quality of the schools, but one of the requirements for our next home - our retirement home - was that the community needed to be more diverse.

But a funny thing happened on the way to the Parker Field House.

Saturdays are intramural sports day here in Parker. Depending on the season, the Field House (where I go to exercise) hosts indoor soccer, basketball, in-line hockey, lacrosse - pretty much whatever they can organize and support, including clinics. I enjoy watching the kids play as I lift, walk and use the arc trainer - especially the littlest kids (so cute). But I've noticed a change in the demographics in both the kids and spectators since last I spent time in those circles.

Some of the children - and their supporters - are people of color. And so are some of their coaches.

And this makes me very, very happy. Living in a diverse community makes me happy. Watching my community expand their perception of what constitutes the "Family of Man" makes me happy.

While realizing that this is spectacularly simplified view, I think one of the reasons the Tea Party and other beneficiaries of unearned privilege have so much trouble with our first black President is because they've simply never been exposed to cultures outside of their Whitey McWhiterson norm. If the only people you've ever been exposed to are "just like you," then expanding your view to include "outsiders" requires a leap of imagination and empathy that many people simply don't have. So they demonize and degrade, and fail to realize that you can disagree with someone's politics and policies without assuming their differences makes them worthy of hate.

I hope that the slow inclusion of people of color in my primarily white community will help to alleviate that attitude. People of color who may or may not believe in your god aren't "outsiders." They're Americans. Just like us.

And Then There were Four

2012-01-19T08:00:00.000-07:00

Horsemen, that is.

While I'm supremely unsurprised that Jon Huntsman has dropped out, I'm still disappointed that the Republicans couldn't field more than one candidate that didn't make me throw up in my mouth.

I do have to say that I'm breathing a huge sigh of relief that both Michele Bachmann and Rick Perry are gone. Leaving aside for a moment that either one of them drops the collective IQ of the Republican Party by several orders of magnitude every time they open their mouths, it seems that both also have a serious issue with the First Amendment. Speaking as a despised religious minority, I'm simply delighted that these two freeze-dried whackaloons will not get the chance to direct the executive branch to discriminate against me on a national level. I have no issue with people of faith who wish to serve in public office, but I do have a problem with them implying that their faith should be my faith, and take action on that belief in their public lives.

So now the Republicans get to choose between Newt Gingrich, Ron Paul. Rick Santorum and Mitt Romney. As noted, all of these people make me throw up in my mouth. Newt is just evil. Ron's philosophy is a bottomless abyss of immorality. Rick's bigotry makes me want to hit him in the hypocritical face with a non-hypothetical shovel.

Which leaves us with Mitt, candidate in perpetuity.

Being a liberal, I think it's safe to say that I don't agree with Mitt's political positions, especially as they drift farther and farther to the right in his effort to suck up to the Tea Party and other undesirables. But I don't really have anything personal against him, unlike the rest of the field. I think the best way to describe my feelings toward him is...meh. Now THERE's a ringing endorsement.

Interesting times, my friends.

2012 Flower Pr0n - Hawai'i!

2012-01-14T08:00:00.000-07:00

RFI = Ready for Ignition

2012-01-12T08:00:00.000-07:00

And the thing that will be igniting is my peace of mind.

Yesterday I received an RFI from one of my customers. For those of you lucky enough not to be "in the know," RFI means "Request for Information." It's basically a list of esoteric questions about a specific solution type that a customer wants to learn about. They're supposed to be issued so an organization can make an informed decision about which vendors will be invited to submit a proposal.

I'm sure this process started out as having some value for the customers who issued them. But that's really no longer the case, and it seems to me that their primary purpose is to drive vendors clinically insane in an effort to weed out the lightweights.

But they're considered a necessary evil in my professional world, which means I'm going to be heads-down for the next two weeks trying to get this under control.

Which means you won't get to hear about my tentative new philosophy "other people aren't idiots" until I have time to actually, you know, write it.

See you when I come up for air...

The Loaded Question

2012-01-10T08:00:00.000-07:00

So I was perusing Facebook this morning, and saw one of those "question" things that periodically appear in my feed like an annoying distant relative who keeps showing up for Sunday dinner:

Sigh.

The thing that depresses me about this isn't that some people think Barack Obama is not doing a good job as our president - people of good conscience can disagree about the best course of action for our country.* No, the thing that distresses me about this is the utter ignorance of history demonstrated by the responses above. Barack Obama is a worse president that Jimmy Carter? Who was a worse president than James Buchanan? Really?

Leaving aside for the moment that that the President's first term is not yet over (and thus such a comparison is patently unfair), who can reasonably compare the president who basically failed to prevent the Civil War and the president who reformed our health care system and find the latter wanting? Who can reasonably compare the president whose policies and execution were so abysmal even the Democrats didn't want him to run for a second term with the president who passed legislation that protects consumers from predatory lending practices and think the former is the better choice?

I'm still making an effort to believe those people who vociferously oppose our president are not prima facie racists without demonstrable supporting evidence. I'm really, really trying. So I'll choose to believe that those individuals who believe Barack Obama is a worse president than James Buchanan are simply ignorant. Horrifyingly, shockingly, appallingly ignorant.

Of course, expressing such a belief does tempt me to ask a question of the "Have you stopped beating your wife" variety regarding the opinion-holder. But that's better than simply assuming they're racist asshats.

Right?

Hello?

::tap, tap::

Is this thing on?

______________
*Like my on-line acquaintances Seth and Elena, I'm trying a new approach called "other people are not idiots," i.e., the fact that you disagree with me, even vociferously, does not make you a dumbass. More on that tomorrow.

Chicon 7 Cosplay

2012-01-09T08:00:00.000-07:00

This year the Smart Man and I have decided to attend the 2012 World Science Fiction Convention in Chicago, IL, called "Chicon 7." This will be our second time attending a WorldCon, as we also attended the Denvention event here in Colorado in 2008.

We'll be attending with other members of the UCF and their assorted partners, spouses, etc., and so (naturally) the subject of costumes came up.

I've decided to bring two costumes - one for Zoe from Firefly, and another in the steam-punk style. So now I'm prowling for costume options.

One of my challenges is the issue of SIGHT. I wear glasses with progressive lenses, and believe me, they are not optional. But my rockin' new Anne Kleins are not appropriate for what I have in mind. Which got me to thinking - why not buy a set of glasses specifically for this event? A pair of rose-colored glasses. In my typical fashion, I'm now in love with this idea, and can't decide what to buy.

This was my first idea. Round sort of screams "steam punk" to me without resorting to the stereotypical goggles.

Then I saw these, which have a sort of a "clockwork" look to them, which definitely relates to steam punk. These make me think I should be living in Seattle.*

Then I saw these, and decided they were even more clockwork-y.

You must imagine them with rose-tinted lenses in each case. I am torn - TORN - about which to buy. Give me your opinion, Hot Chicks and Smart Men.

___________
*If you don't get that reference, you're missing out on some really cool books.

2012 Flower Pr0n - Hawai'i!

2012-01-07T08:00:00.000-07:00

Boogie Blogging Friday - The Most Spoiled Dog in the World Edition

2012-01-06T08:00:00.000-07:00

It was very cold last week. COLD. And I'm old. Shut up.