How relationships work

5 Things women wish men did

2015-07-22T09:53:00.001+05:30

Understanding women seems to be one tough nut to crack for guys. They never seem to unravel what a woman wants from them. Here is a list of things that women wish men did.

1. Help her in household chores: Just as they say, "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach", similarly women too love to date a man who can cook. Also doing the dishes, cleaning the house is a lot of work. Volunteer to help her, she will love it!

2. Stay organised: Let's just accept that most men don't stay organised and their bachelor pad or house stays in a mess. Women love men who stay organised as it lessens down their burden of cleaning up.

3. Stay well groomed: That beard or stubble of yours is sexy and there is no doubt about it, but trimming it and making it shapely did no harm. Also using a good deodorant is a must! A well groomed man is a huge turn on for women.

4. Listen to her: I'm not generalising but most men pay no attention when their girl is talking which in turn leads to fights. If you are not in a mood to talk, tell that to her politely and make up for it after sometime. But DO listen to her. That way she feels loved.

5. Confess your love more frequently: We know you love her to the core, but confessing your love and telling her how much you love her sometimes is a great way to make her day. Remember, a simple "I love you" goes a long way!

How to do healthy discussions with your husband

2011-10-17T17:04:00.000+05:30

Now this is one big problem that all women face after marriage. Discussing something with your husband means ending up with a fight and eventually not talking to each other. This becomes such big an issue that it could also end up in a divorce in the long run. So to make the relationship smoother, maintaining the love factor and lead a happy married life every woman should know the art of having a healthy discussion with your husband. Given below is a guide that will help you sail smoothly through all discussions on any matter.

1. The first and foremost thing to keep in mind before you start discussing anything is to check your husband’s state of mind. If he is tensed, not in a mood to talk or worried about something never start up with a discussion as it is bound to end in a fight. So it is very important to wait for the right time and see when your husband is in a mood to talk. If your husband is not in a mood to talk and still you go on discussing things either he is going to criticise you of being a nagging wife or just remain silent without actually ‘hearing’ what you have got to say.

2. When the discussion has commenced always stick to the topic being discussed. If you change the topic or go on to some other thing the topic being discussed won’t get sorted out and could lead to further complications or a fight.

3. While discussing things with him never be in the mood for the ‘blame game’. That’s one thing which is going to end the discussion and start an argument. If you are just going to argue over a petty matter or start blaming him, he is never going to listen to what you have got to say.

4. Don’t do all the talking and let him talk too. It is very important to be a good listener too. If he wants to share his own view point let him say it. Try to understand his point too and if it is right accept it. If you do not agree with his viewpoint don’t just condemn it calling it baseless or useless; instead make him understand why you feel it isn’t right.

5. Never drag each other’s exes or families in your personal discussion; it will lead to a big fight. Talk about the present situation and current topic, forget about the past.

6. Don’t play the role of a decision maker, bully or a mother-figure. Both of you have equal rights and to remain in the spirit of a healthy discussion both should contribute and together take a decision or come to a conclusion.

7. Never discuss for the heck of having a discussion. Every discussion ends with a conclusion. So aim at drawing a conclusion out of the discussion and ending the matter rather than stretching it endlessly and uselessly.

8. Be precise and logical when you are having a discussion. Being overtly emotional or crying your heart out is not the right way of having a healthy discussion. Such an act will end the spirit of the discussion. Think from the head and let the mind talk instead of the heart.

9. Be reasonable and give valid reasons for any point that you put up in a discussion. Baseless claims or assumptions will put your man off and he will stop the discussion and end up fighting with you. Be well equipped with enough logical reasons and proofs.

10. When a conclusion is taken out mutually end the matter there and stick to what has been decided.

These tips are sure shot ways to having a healthy discussion with your husband and avoiding any kind of argument or fight.

5 Tips on what not to do on your first date

2011-07-23T14:18:00.000+05:30

We have often read many dating tips on where to go on a first date and how to make your first date special, but this time I have put together a guide that will explain what you must not do on your first date. If you pay attention to all the little details you can end up making your first date very special and memorable.

1. For most guys as they hear the word ‘date’, the first thing that pops up in their mind is physical intimacy. Any guy who is just looking for reasons to hold hands or touch her is actually disrespecting the girl. So all you guys out there go with the flow and see if the girl is any bit interested before jumping on to the ‘main part’ of the date.

2. Girls love discussing things, gossiping and chatting. This is only good as far as you don’t bore your partner. Talking too much about your past relationships or bitching about the girls around you might bore your guy to death. Avoid talking about your ex and concentrate on the current guy; also avoid bitching about other girls and concentrate on your own date instead.

3. Guys like showing off their sense of humour by cracking jokes thinking the girl likes it. Here it is important to note and sense what the girl is feeling. Going overboard with your jokes or cracking those poor jokes will definitely turn off the girl. Another thing to note here is never make girls the butt of your jokes; after all you too are dating a girl! Stop showing your pride in being a guy as the girl will walk away and never come back.

4. All you girls out there avoid being overtly conscious and checking repeatedly how you are looking as this might turn the guy off. Be confident of who you are and how you are carrying yourself. Be comfortable in what you are wearing and carry it off with style and the right amount of attitude.

5. Being courteous and respecting a woman are the true qualities of a man. So guys keep your manners in check and behave well in front of the girl you’re dating to avoid turning her off. Show off your gentlemen skills to maintain her interest in you.

Qualities of a good friend

2011-07-19T14:47:00.000+05:30

In today’s fast paced world where relationships are losing their importance and life is becoming increasingly mechanical, it is very difficult to find people who are real and genuine. ‘Good friends’ is a term long forgotten and making such friends is turning in to only a dream. There are very few people who can count their ‘real’ friends; friends who are true and good. In such a world where it is becoming difficult to find a good friend, people are also losing the eye for detail. It is becoming more and more difficult to identify who is a good friend and who is not. For this purpose I bring you a small guide that includes all the qualities of a good friend.

· A good friend accepts you the way you are: This is one thing that is the main distinguishing point between a usual friend and a good friend. A good friend will accept the way you are and will never want you to change. At the end what matters to him/her is you as a person.

· A good friend is honest and sincere: A good friend will always say what he/she believes in. they will be honest to you no matter what. A friend who is honest and is sincere in maintaining the friendship is definitely a good friend.

· A good friend will do what is good for you: A good friend will not necessarily say all the good things to you and be overtly nice. He/she will say and do what is right and beneficial for you. They will think about your welfare.

· A good friend always supports: Support is one thing that you can always expect from a good friend. Regardless of who supports you and who doesn’t, a good friend will always support in what you believe in and will be by your side forever.

· A good friend is selfless: He/she will never keep a count on what all good things he/she did and how many acts of welfare are pending from your side. A good friend does good things selflessly and is not obsessed with his/her own benefit. He/she does all the good things and forgets because that is what they think is friendship all about.

· A good friend is happy when you are happy and sad when you are sad: A good friend relates to you and feels for you. When you are happy he/she will double your happiness by being equally happy and when you are sad they will divide your sadness by being there for you and letting you share things with them.

So if you have a friend who has all of these qualities in him/her, treasure them. Such friends indeed are rare to get.

5 tips on how to be friends with ex

2011-07-05T16:24:00.001+05:30

Being friends with your ex is not an easy job. Your break up with your ex happened due to lack of compatibility and understanding; now being in a cordial relationship with the same person is definitely a tough job. No break up happens very smoothly with any disagreements. Disputes and arguments are bound to happen when you’re breaking up. But it is also very essential that you stay on cordial terms with your ex as you might cross paths in life later, or could be friends to retain the sweetness in the relationship without any awkwardness. What if your ex works in the same company where you do? Then it is all the more important to be on good terms with your ex.

You might be wondering how it is possible. For this few tips have been given below.

1. Being friends with your ex would mean a cordial and easy break up. If you have gone through such a break up, well and fine, but in case you’ve argued and ended the relationship on not a very good note, it would mean you better patch up soon. For a patch up you must apologise for the mess that was created during your break up with him/her.

2. Apologising would mean giving adequate reasons and explanations and then giving time for your ex to think over it. Don’t be impatient.

3. When you are trying to be cordial again with your ex, state your intention clearly. Tell him/her that you feel sorry for the mess and just want to have a cordial relationship so that there is harmony between both of you. In such a way your ex would understand the real reason behind the patch up. In case you’re in the same office just explain that you would not want you and his/her professional lives to get affected hence it is needed that you both enter a cordial relationship and forget what happened in the past.

4. It is very important to make it very clear to your ex that you are not going to flirt with him/her again and just want to be friends with no romantic involvement.

5. For best results frank, open and simple approach would be sufficient to build a cordial relationship with your ex. Don’t be too fancy in your approach or try beating behind the bush or flattering your ex too much. Be clear and straight forward.

The way you approach or deal with your ex matters a lot as it determines how cordial your relationship is going to be.

What guys check out in a girl first?

2011-07-02T11:24:00.002+05:30

Just as men think its difficult to understand women, girls too wish to know what kind of women men get attracted to. If you are curious to know the same and have been wondering about the same from quite sometime now, here are the list of things that men check out in a girl-

Off course her assets!

Men will be men. Let’s accept that this is the first thing all guys notice in a girl. They might do it tactfully so that the girl doesn’t come to know or do it unabashedly; but they do notice!

Her long flowing cascades…

Hair is one of the things that attract guys. Most guys are fond of long beautiful hair. A girl with such hair will never go unnoticed by any guy (forget hair, no girl goes unnoticed by guys!).

Confidence

This is something guys easily make out. They can easily sense if the girl is uncomfortable in what she is wearing or carrying. So a confident girl with the right amount of attitude and style WILL have many eyes checking her out.

What she wears

Yes, girls notice other girls’ outfits and measure each other’s fashion quotient. Guys see it the other way. They notice what a girl wears and make an opinion of her. What she wears and how she carries herself ARE noticed by guys (whether they admit or not!).

Sense of humour!

A girl with a great sense of humour is an eye candy for most guys. They just love to crack up on her jokes as this makes them enjoy her company to the fullest. They assume that a girl with a good sense of humour has a lighter and chilled out attitude towards life and that she is not among the panicky girls.

These are the things that guys notice and get attracted to in a girl when they meet her for the first time.

Kinds of men, women get most attracted to!

2011-06-23T13:37:00.002+05:30

The guys are considered to be ones who easily for fall for any woman, but did you know that there are certain kinds of men, women get easily attracted to? If not then look below for the guide that tells you about the men, women fall for most easily!

1. The Romantic guy: He is the kind of man every woman wants to be with! Women loved to be pampered and told that how beautiful/nice/lovely they are! Surprises are one thing that wins away their hearts. The romantic guy is the one who surprises his girl not only with flowers and gifts but also walks hand in hand even on the busiest of streets. He is the one who gives soft kisses over the forehead and looks lovingly into her eyes. This is the kind of man any woman would fall for!

2. The Super-confident guy: The super confident guys are the ones who carry themselves confidently and hardly care about what other men are doing. He is confident in himself and doesn’t hang his tongue out for every other girl. There is something mysteriously sexy about them that attracts women and drives them crazy! They are sometimes misunderstood as the arrogant ones, but being in relationship with these guys is definitely one cake walk!

3. The Artistic guy: The artistic guy is the creative one. He sings/paints or plays an instrument to her girl’s delight. He loves doing creative things and thinks ‘out of the box’, a quality every girl would fall for! When he plans surprises they are the ‘real’ surprises that will sweep women off their feet!

4. The Funny guy: Who doesn’t like to laugh and women are no different. The funny guy is the one who will laugh and make you laugh. Life seems to be a joy ride with this kind of men. Women most easily fall for these men as they connect instantly with women and are not only great friends but ardent lovers too!

5. The gentleman-like mature guy: These kinds of men are every woman’s dream man. Any girl would want to settle for the mature gentleman-like guy. He is the one who is responsible, mature, well-settled and handles the relationship maturely. He is the perfect husband material and women eventually would like to settle down with him.

5 Kinds of women men get most attracted to!

2011-06-16T16:42:00.003+05:30

It is a well-known fact that men seem to get easily attracted by women but do you know that there are certain kind of women men cannot resist at all? Yes you read that right! The 5 irresistible kinds of women for men are given below.

1. The kitchen master- A famous adage says, ‘The shortest way to man’s heart is through his stomach”. This is true. Men adore those women who are cooking champions. The best way to impress a man is through a delicious meal. These are the kinds of women men cannot resist at all and are bound to fall for.

2. Just like his Momma- Every man’s perfect woman is his mother. The girl, a guy would like to settle with must have a reflection of his mother. The caring and affectionate woman, in whom a man sees his mother, is the perfect one for him and nothing would ever do her apart from him.

3. Finance manager- Men mostly are careless when it comes to saving money. They seldom think about the future and believe in living life today to the fullest. This keeps them from saving money. A woman who looks after a man’s savings and spends money wisely is most adored by men. As most men consider women to be spendthrifts and shopaholics who burn men’s pocket and shell out their money; a woman who believes in saving money will be greatly adored by men.

4. The best buddy- Men always complain of women not giving them enough space. A woman who is a man’s best buddy and understands him very well giving him the space he wants is definitely the one a man would love dating.

5. The ‘smilester’- Women who are bitching about other women, crying, fretting and whining are the last kinds of women a man would want to date. Any woman who loves to laugh and live life cheerfully is the one a man would never be able to resist. The fun loving girl who believes in living life to the fullest and seldom sheds a tear is a man’s dream girl.

4 reasons why father-daughter relationship is so important

2011-06-15T21:41:00.003+05:30

Father-daughter relationship is one of the strongest relationships of all. It has been truly said that most daughters are Daddy’s girl and the sons are Mama’s boy.

The main reason why daughters are so emotionally attached to their fathers is that they see a perfect and complete man in their fathers. Every girl dreams of marrying a boy who has her father’s reflection in him. For every daughter her father is the perfect man and she wishes that he becomes her great friend too.

The 4 reasons why the father-daughter relationship is so important are given below.

1. Every girl needs to have a father figure in her life. A father makes her strong enough to face all difficulties in life. He teaches that life is not a bed of roses and facing the difficulties gives you strength to face the even more difficult ones. It is important to have the courage to fight back when life puts you down.

2. Fathers teach daughters how to be grounded and keep your head on your shoulders. This gives a person the ability to take the important decisions of life efficiently.

3. Fathers are the ones who teach their daughters how to be practical. If decisions are taken alone by heart then there is no surety that they will be correct. It is important to think practically in life and not get swayed away by emotions.

4. Fathers make daughters ready to take on responsibilities. They set that perfect example by handling the responsibilities of family efficiently.

Every father is a pillar of strength and support for the daughter. He is the one who gives her those important lessons of life that will guide her through happy and rough times in life. Hence the father-daughter relationship is one of the most beautiful and a very important one amongst all.

Tackling teenagers’ drinking habits

2011-06-14T13:42:00.003+05:30

Teenage is that phase in a person’s life when he/she is neither a child nor an adult. This is a developing period, when a child develops both mentally and physically and moves towards becoming an adult. As they undergo a major change in the way they think and act, this age brings in all the confusion of what is right and what is wrong. They undergo a lot of peer pressure and follow what is considered ‘cool’. Here starts their experimentations and trials. They try doing what they think adults do. This includes smoking and drinking. The real problem comes when they don’t draw a line and end up drinking like a fish.

Parents play a very crucial role in how they shape up their child’s thinking. Since the beginning if the parents don’t pay enough attention to their child, he/she could end up becoming an alcoholic. It is important for parents to discuss the harmful effects of drinking. It’s also very important to let them know that why drinking is not ‘cool’ and what the other teenagers are doing totally unjustified.

Topics such as these have to be discussed from a young age. Parents need to make their child understand what is morally and ethically correct and what’s not. You cannot just force your opinion. There has to be a valid reason why the parents feel so. Giving examples validates your opinion and lets the child also believe the same.

If you are not sure what to say where such a matter is concerned, then you must tell them that these things must be left for later years. The minimum threshold of deciding whether drinking occasionally is fair or not must be left to the time when he/she starts working. All their childhood and teenage must go off with the firm belief that drinking is unhealthy. Now how effectively parents communicate this depends on them.

Another thing that must be kept in mind is that if any of the parents themselves drink occasionally, they must never do it in front of the child otherwise all the teachings will go waste. The child will see you drinking and feel if the parent can so can I.

Always remember, making your child understand the harmful effects of drinking must be handled tactfully so that your child learns from what you teach him/her and remembers it throughout his/her teenage.

5 Tips to stop your child from becoming a bully

2011-06-11T23:54:00.004+05:30

There are many children who bully others at school and it is always good to counsel your children and advise them on tips to deal with bullies. What if your child is among the bullies or the leader of the bullies group? This is something to get worried about as your child might be harming many children at school with their bossy attitude and troublesome behaviour. If your child is becoming a bully you need to pay attention to him/her.

It is always better never to let any such condition come under which your child undergoes major behavioural changes and turns into a bully. The situations that lead a child into becoming a bully in most cases develop at home. For this 5 important tips are given below.

1. Never be overtly strict with your child- This is something that must be kept in mind by you always. If you scold your child too much or reprimand him for every small little mistake he/she makes, this will build up feelings of revenge and make him irritable in nature. Here he/she knows very well that they cannot vent their feelings in front of you as they would in turn be scolded. These feelings come out at school with other children. They start dominating, harassing and bullying other children in order to show they are superior and do what they want. This is basically an outpour of all the emotions hidden in them that build up over a long period of time due to your scolding him/her at petty issues.

2. Share things with your child- Every parent must befriend their child and let him/her outpour their feelings and ideas or thoughts. In small little discussions involve your child and let him speak. Respect his/her opinion and show your acknowledgement towards it. In such a way you will indirectly teach him to respect others opinions and views and will in turn prohibit all tendencies of becoming a bully.

3. If you notice the signs, talk to the child- If you notice that your child bullies children, never let it go off. Speak to your child and find out why he does it. Tell him/her why bullying is unhealthy. Give practical examples in everything you say so that the child relates to what you are saying and believes in your views.

4. Keep fights and arguments with your spouse confined to your bedroom- Every relationship faces times when disputes and fights take place. Keep these fights confined to your room where you can discuss matters and sort out things. Never fight in front of your child. He/she will learn from it and try it out at school. This is the first step towards becoming a bully.

5. If needed take your child to a counsellor- If things are getting out of hand and you are not able to handle it yourself seek an expert’s advice. The counsellor is a professional and knows exactly how to deal with such issues. There is no harm in taking a professional’s advice or help. This doesn’t mean your child is ill. He/she just probably needs some guidance.

Take help of these tips to stop your child from becoming a bully and make him/her a polite and well-mannered individual.

How to fall in love

2011-06-08T16:14:00.002+05:30

Falling in love is something that cannot be planned. You never know when you can fall in love. This feeling indeed is the most beautiful feeling in the world. If you are among those who haven’t been struck by the cupid’s arrow here is the chance to find your beloved.

A few tips can help you fall in love and find your Mr./Ms. Right. They are given below.

Know your choice- Before you begin one thing that you must be sure of is what kind of person you would want to date. This is the most important of all things. You must have a clear image of the person you would like to fall in love with. Set realistic image. Don’t expect a fairy to descend from heaven just for you or prince charming riding on a white horse comes and sweeps you off your feet. Don’t be too rigid too. You must not set impossible expectations/rules/image to achieve.

Start socializing- Now as you have decided and prepared yourself mentally to fall in love, it’s time to find him/her. Now you obviously won’t be roaming around with a signboard in your hand reading “I want a lover”. So start socialising. Attending parties, get-togethers and clubbing will help you find your special someone. Interaction with more and more people will help you achieve your motive.

Be patient- Now that you have started your search, be patient. Remember, Rome was not built in a day. Similarly it is not possible that you will find your special one overnight. Give yourself time. Don’t be desperate and jump on to any girl/guy to make him your date. Give time to the relationship and start with becoming friends. Who knows things may soon turn out to be the way you wanted them to be!

Don’t be too choosy, nobody is perfect- Now this is something you’ve got to keep in mind. Don’t be too rigid with the image you made for your beloved. Nobody is perfect in this world. Be flexible. Accept the virtues and vices in the person you are falling for. If he/she does not perfectly fit into the image but you find him/her too sweet to be avoided then go with the flow. At the end what matters is the heart. If the person is sweet and you gel well with him/her that serves the purpose!

So if you still haven’t been struck by the cupid’s arrow, start your hunt today to find your special one and feel the magic of love.

How essential is premarital counselling?

2011-06-03T13:59:00.002+05:30

Premarital counselling is a way to get advice by an expert on matters related to married life that a couple would want to discuss or know about. More and more couples these days are opting for premarital counselling sessions to prepare themselves well before entering a married life. Now this doesn’t mean in any way that they aren’t compatible with each other; it just means they are getting help to make their married life even sweeter.

Premarital counselling these days is such a common act that it is considered as important as making arrangements for the wedding ceremony. Such a session develops more possibilities for the couple to lead a happy married life. The two people sit together to understand each other and resolve issues if any and become ready to enjoy both sweet and sour moments of life together.

Issues such as getting to know each other and their families, family planning, managing finances and all the other matters related to marriage are discussed in a premarital counselling sessions. Here couples decide and discuss every possible matter related to marriage so that misunderstandings do not become an obstacle in their happy and peaceful married life.

The expert makes the couple understand the importance of cooperation, communication, trust, honesty and love in a marriage. This helps them understand each other and know how beautiful the institution of marriage is. Matters concerning physical intimacy are also discussed by the couples with the expert. Having a frank and candid conversation is aimed at, in a premarital counselling session. This makes things transparent between the couple and helps the expert discuss things freely and openly.

The expert also addresses in-laws issues and conflicts resolution issues, so that if any of such matters arises after their marriage the couple deals with it together in an effective manner. The advantages of attending a premarital counselling are several and opting for one before getting married is wisest of all decisions.

Choosing a premarital counsellor is a very crucial job that must be done after thorough research work. Go for the one who’s most reputed after consulting friends, families and conducting a research yourself too. The effectiveness of your counselling depends heavily on how well the counsellor does his/her job. Hence the counsellor must be a renowned expert.

So, if you or any of your acquaintances are about to get married, taking help of a premarital counsellor is advised to enjoy the sweet taste of marriage for years to come.

How to make a great first impression

2011-06-02T13:13:00.002+05:30

The very first time when you meet up a person think of the things you notice first in him/her. These are the things that determine your first impression on the other person.

The first impression that you make on a person is very important as it is the basis on which the other person judges on what kind of a person you are. The way you’ve left your first impression becomes even more important if you are on a date or meeting a guy/girl for the first time.

There are a few important things you must remember in order to leave a great first impression!

The very first thing that you must keep in mind is your eye contact. If you do not maintain a good eye contact with the guy/girl you are dating, it means you are hiding something or you might be lying about something. Maintaining a continuous eye contact means you are confident as a person and there is no sign of hesitation or nervousness.

Another thing that is to be kept in mind is your dress/outfit. Be confident about yourself. This is extremely important if you are on a date. To be super confident about yourself you must dress up comfortably. Wear something that you are confident about. Carry it with grace and poise.

Next is your posture. When you are standing with your date, walking or sitting be comfortable and feel tall. If you feel tall, your body language will be confident and your posture will be erect. If you are a guy it is even more important to have a good body posture while sitting or standing. If you hunch or do not sit or stand straight, you will leave a bad impression on the girl you’re dating. You will seem to be a lazy, carefree person not serious about anything in life. So it is very important to have a good body posture.

Another thing that’s extremely important is your words. The way you speak and the words you say are the biggest contributors of your first impression on your date. Think before you speak is what you must remember here. Nobody likes to date a blabber-mouthed person. You must think well before you utter any word. You must make sense, be reasonable in your behavior and must not offend the other person by the words you speak. Tone of your voice is also very important, so watch it.

So keep these simple yet very important points in mind to leave a great first impression on your date.

How to get back with your ex-boyfriend

2011-06-01T17:05:00.002+05:30

Do the beautiful memories of the days spent with your ex-boyfriend make you cry inconsolably? Have you just not been able to concentrate anywhere and keep thinking about him all the time? Do you regret the decision of breaking up with your boyfriend? If the answers to even anyone of the questions stated above is a yes, you need to get back with your ex-boyfriend now! Yes you heard that right! Everyone makes mistakes and breaking up with your boyfriend is a part of those mistakes. So stop sulking and get ready to patch up with your ex!

Now the big question that arises here is HOW? Yes here is the answer to the question.

The first rule of getting back with your ex-boyfriend is not to chase him but slowly make your way into his heart forever. If you chase him or show your desperateness to get back with him, he will run away from you. Nobody likes to be chased all the time. So as you plan to get back with him, give him a call. If you feel hesitant in calling him up straight away, text him a simple message expressing your desire to talk to him. If he responds, great but if he doesn’t, wait for a day or two and give him a call. Remember your each step should have a few days’ gap in between so that it doesn’t seem that you are desperate to get back with your boyfriend.

As he agrees to meet you, meet at a calm place where there is not much of a crowd as you would want to talk peacefully with him. On meeting him, tell him how you’ve been thinking about the day you broke up. Tell him that you feel really sorry about the whole episode. Tell him that you believe it wasn’t his fault completely and you had been quite unfair in dealing with him the same day. Tell him how bad you feel for the harsh words you uttered for him and that they must have hurt him badly. Apologise for the incident, also remember not to start begging for mercy. Just say what is required and never be too clingy.

Now tell him that you would want to forget everything and want him too to try forgetting whatever happened. Ask him for his opinion on the matter. It should be a two way conversation so don’t do all the talking and let him speak his heart out. Encourage him to speak what he feels. Empathise with him and show your concern for his feelings. When you feel he has spoken his true feelings, tell him your desire to start afresh with a cordial relationship of friendship. Don’t jump on to love! Start with friendship. He won’t deny your offer. Tell him to think about it and it is not necessary for him to answer at that moment itself. Give some time to him. He will be pleasantly surprised with the space you are giving him and not being too pushy.

As he agrees for a friendly relationship, promise to yourself not to repeat the same old mistakes you made last time. Never nag him. Be his good friend. Don’t preach him all the time. Give him his required space. Never show your insecurity or an irritated behaviour when he talks to a girl. If he is not in a mood to meet or talk someday, let him have his way. Show your changed behaviour. After all, he also deserves his required space and freedom just as you do.

When you start feeling that quite a lot of days have passed by and he has become a great friend of yours and started being very comfortable and happy with you, show your love to him subtly. He will catch your signs. Flirt with him a little and he will know what you feel for him. As and when he starts reciprocating the same feelings and flirts back with you, after a few days sit with him and let him know that you would like to date him again and give your relationship a second chance. Show your feelings strongly and give him time to think about it. Tell him to take his own sweet time before he lets you know. Have patience; he will get back with you.

If you follow all the steps correctly, who knows, he may be the one to ask you to date him again! So start following the above given steps and get back with your ex-boyfriend in no time!

How to break up with boyfriend

2011-05-31T16:05:00.002+05:30

Breaking up with your boyfriend can get really tough no matter how long or short the relationship has been. When things get out of hand and the relationship seems to have got messed up, it’s best to end it rather than carrying it on pointlessly. To maintain the dignity of your relationship it is best to part ways amicably rather than creating a scene and breaking up. For this you need to keep a few important things in mind that can help you deal with the situation easily.

The first thing to remember here is that avoiding the break up is useless. When the problem is big enough and needs to be handled, make it your first priority. Confront the situation. Talk to your boyfriend in person. Never send emails or text messages to break up. You need to give an explanation and talk over the matter with your boyfriend. Always try having a healthy discussion and don’t start up with a fight. Give logical reasons for the break up and explain things to him.

For your break up discussion never go to your favourite hangout. You would not want to leave a bad impression on others. A place that is quiet and free of crowd or too many people must be chosen for the discussion. Sorting out things in a private place also gives you less chances of embarrassment if thing become ugly.

If breaking up with your boyfriend was the last thing you could do and you are feeling really low about it, never start crying in front of him. This can make him feel that you are not strong enough to break up with him. It could also convey to him that you don’t want the relationship to end and you are not serious about the breakup. If you are happy with your decision don’t be too casual in your approach by laughing on his face or making fun of him. You should be polite and sensitive enough to care about your boyfriend’s feelings too.

Calling off a relationship can be tacky and dealing with the situation tactfully is what is required of you. So be patient, strong and calm while you handle the situation.

Getting back with your girlfriend

2011-05-30T11:17:00.002+05:30

After sometime of your breakup with your girlfriend you realise that the relationship was too strong to be broken completely. You feel that it could be worked upon and not ended forever. Feelings of guilt, sadness or frustration start affecting you after your break up then it’s time to patch up with your girlfriend and get her back. Who knows your girlfriend might be feeling the same. In order to start all over again you need to keep in mind a few important things. A step by step approach must be taken in order to get back with your girlfriend.

The first step here would be apologizing for all the mess that took place. It is also important to ask for apology for your rude or bad behaviour. Even if it was not you who initiated the mess, you could instead initiate breaking ice with her.

Start doing nice things for her. Show her your love by sending her flowers with a message expressing your sadness or guilt for whatever happened. You can also text her a loving message along with sending flowers. This will draw her attention towards your gestures and true feelings. Even if she is not responding may be she is taking time to think over it or is probably is too hurt to forgive so soon. Give her the required time. Don’t force yourself upon her or act crazily by calling her up again and again or desperately pleading her for mercy or forgiveness. Wait for some days and do something innovative and loving for her. Don’t repeat the same flowers sending thing. Do something creative.

Once she forgives you and is ready to talk to you, befriend her. Don’t directly jump on to become lovers again. Start by becoming her good friend. She will most likely not deny your offer. Tell her that you both must forget whatever happened and become friends again.

Now as you become good friends, it’s been time take the next step. Remember to have patience and take right step at the right time.

When it’s been a while start showing your love for her subtly. Show her that she indeed is the one you’ve been waiting for. Show her your desire of having her back in your life. After showing subtle indications, see for the right time and talk to her one day directly about it. Tell her what you feel for her and that you had been really stupid in letting her go off. Tell her that you really repent losing her and would not repeat the same mistakes you did last time.

Now give her time to think upon it and decide. Don’t be impatient. Your loving words and gestures will resurface her feelings of love for you. She will come back to you in no time. Welcome her with open arms and make her feel she is and will forever be your special one!

Communication: The Key to Resolving Issues with Spouse

2011-05-28T11:25:00.002+05:30

On the four pillars of trust, communication, honesty and love stands the structure of every relationship. Even if a single pillar is lost the structure of the relationship comes down. All relationships come with a package of sweet and sour moments. Where some beautiful moments add to the pleasant memories; some sour moments make up the not so good memories. With every relationship come disagreements and arguments. No two individual will have the same point of view in all matters, no matter how similar they may be and marriage is no different. When any one amongst the two people does not agree on a common decision or action, clashes are bound to happen. With these clashes come fights and arguments.

Nobody likes to sleepover with issues. So it is important to resolve them as quickly as possible. Resolution to problems can only be found if there is communication. It is very important for the two of them to communicate and sort out the differences. If they don’t resolve the issue and the matter, the relationship gets soured and weakened from within.

If you do not agree on some matter or there is anything that your spouse has said that has hurt you, it is very important to tell him/her politely about it, so that they come to know why you are upset. Only then can a solution be taken out. Shouting, blaming each other and pointing at each other’s shortcomings is not the way to deal with an issue, no matter how serious it may be. It is always better to sit down and talk about things when they don’t seem to be in a good shape.

It is also important to remember that a discussion is possible only if the two people are willing to do so. Even if one of the persons is not in a mood to listen, it is best to avoid any discussion as the matters can become worse. The other person, in such a case, may not take your discussion sportingly and become upset or even angry. So a discussion on the right time, in the right manner is also very important.

When you sit down to discuss any matter, focus on the core issue and not go in to the past and bring back buried matters. Focus on what is being discussed with an intention of taking out a solution and then closing the chapter there. It is also important to not start cribbing or whining about anything. Be patient and willing to listen and take out a solution. Don’t just beat behind the bush.

Once you have agreed on a common decision taken out with both the people’s consent, it is very important to then follow it. If you don’t abide by what has been decided then the whole discussion will go waste.

So whatever may be the problem always aim for taking out a solution through communication with your partner. This will strengthen your bond and avoid frequent conflicts and issues.

Bring back the lost romance

2011-05-27T11:10:00.003+05:30

Life today has mechanized so much that people hardly have time for their families. Talking about the couples, they find it extremely difficult to cope up with their super busy lives. In such an age, love is taking a backseat and everybody is running the same rat race. This is the reason why divorce rate is going up and the unmarried couples are breaking up. It is important in today’s time to find out ways that can help you keep the feelings of love ignited in your hearts.

To maintain the special bond called love that you both share you will have to take help of a few simple steps. These are sure shot ways to bring back your lost romance. The first thing to keep in mind is that sweet little romantic gestures help a great deal in keeping the romance alive. These small gestures will bring a big difference. For example instead of asking for your car keys from your partner, reach out for them yourself by putting your hand in his/her pocket! It will be a surprising gesture for you partner. It sends mischievous romantic message to your partner making him/her feel the love. A small peck on the cheek or neck at a busy time of the day could also be a pleasant surprise. Before leaving for your office, leave a short love message stuck at the refrigerator or the dining table to let him/her read and blush like a fresh rose. Take help of such small loving gestures to bring big difference in your love life.

To keep the romance alive you would want your beloved to feel the love that’s there in your heart. After he/she is back from the office, opt for giving a head or even a full body massage to your partner! This will be fun and sexy.

You could also opt for preparing a small, simple yet delicious dinner for your partner, with great arrangements on your dining table. Bring in the scented candles, lovely soft air freshener, beautiful flowers all around and your favourite romantic music playing in the background while you both enjoy the dinner together.

Another surprising act could be dropping in at your partner’s office and offering to have lunch together! That will be a real good surprise for him/her. You could also text a romantic message to your partner on his cell phone during a busy day. They will not fail to notice your loving gesture and revert back with a cute message.

Gestures such as holding hands, giving soft pecks on neck or cheeks or winking an eye at your partner is a sure shot simple ways to keep the romance alive.

Opt for keeping weekends free for your beloved and spend quality time with him/her. Choose for a getaway every now and then with your partner and bring alive the lost romance.

So don’t wait for that big happiness to arrive and take help of such small little things to enjoy a great loving life with your partner!

Personalised gift ideas for your partner on his/her birthday

2011-05-26T12:04:00.003+05:30

Is your beloved’s birthday round the corner? Are you falling short of ideas as to what gift you must give? Do you really want her/him to feel special this time? If all these questions are popping up in your mind, you are reading the right article. I shall give you solutions on how and what to gift!

What most people usually do is go to a gift store and pick up a gift that your beloved may like, but hey that’s something anyone could do! What if you gift the same thing your beloved’s best friend already has! It will be a real disaster! You won’t want this thing to happen. To avoid duplication or a blunder you could surprise your partner with a personalised gift!

Personalised gifts are a simple and special way to show what you feel for your special ones. Personalised gifts can either be made by you or a gift could be purchased from a gift shop and be given your personal touch. You could also order a special personalised gift online. Just go to the web and search on your favourite search engine, the best website for ordering a personalised gift for your partner. These website not only create your personalised gift but they also deliver at the door step of your beloved! What better than having a gift made and sent on your behalf to your partner? This works wonders if you’re in a long distance relationship.

For making a personalised gift yourself, you can buy a mug or a t-shirt from a store and get pictures of you and your beloved together, printed on it! This way you will remind your partner of the beautiful moments spent together.

What you can also do is buy a nice cuddly teddy bear and get embroidered a personalised love message or both of your names on its jacket or body. This will look great and add a personal touch to an otherwise usual gift. You could also get printed a collage of you and your partner’s lovely pictures on a bedside clock or a wall clock too! This will remind them of you all the time!

If you lack creativity or wonderful new ideas, you can also check on the internet on how you can make a usual gift turn into a special personalised one. So surprise your partner this time with a wonderful looking personalised gift and see his/her face light up with joy and love.

Dealing with divorce

2011-05-25T11:33:00.005+05:30

Divorce is one thing that no married couple wants to go through. When things become very ugly and the relationship gets damaged beyond repair one has to go through the terrible phase of breaking up with the spouse. This fallout takes a toll on a person’s happiness disturbing him emotionally and mentally. It takes a lot of time for the person to get over the grief and deal with divorce. Some people find it extremely difficult to come out of the trauma they’ve faced. For this it is always better to look at the positive side of the divorce. Think of the main reason for your divorce. Was it an abusive relationship, a nagging wife/husband, a cheating spouse or the complete loss of that spark? Whatever was the reason, the divorce happened for your good. You’ve got rid of the relationship, finally, that never seemed to work!

After a divorce it’s time to forgive and forget. This definitely is not the easiest of all tasks. This might take time, but have patience and believe that everything is going to be alright.

The worst thing that most people do after a divorce is shunning all contacts and locking themselves up in a room. The situation gets worsened when they listen to those sad songs to make the matters worse or the romantic ones that they used to listen with their spouse. Remember, this is the most terrible thing one could do to him/herself. Stop being lonely and sad and try cheering up yourself. Your friends are going to help you the most in overcoming the grief. Come out of the room, talk to your friends, and start socialising. Getting divorced doesn’t mean your life has ended. You have a long way to go.

Everybody in your social circle knows you’re going through the terrible phase called divorce, so people around you will be ready to cooperate and make you comfortable. Of course nobody can cover up that space you created for your spouse, but then what are friends for? You can always count on your closest friends to help you deal with the loss you’ve suffered.

To come out of the grief as quickly as possible it is best to divert your mind to something you love doing. It could be a dance class, a painting class, a music class, a meditation or yoga or a gym class; it could be anything you love doing. If you love shopping, take company of your closest friend and go shopping. Do all the things you like doing. If you are an adventure lover, go rafting, skiing, bungee jumping, trekking or any other activity you’ve wanted to do. The point is to not sit over and sulk in the grief but come out with a fighting spirit and face the situation boldly.

If nothing seems to help you, take help of a doctor. See a psychologist. He/she will help you overcome the grief and depression you’re going through. Follow your doctor’s advice and find yourself coming out of it real quick!

Dealing with divorce has never been easy but if you have an optimistic approach nothing can stop you from coming out of the situation as a true winner.

Dating after divorce

2011-05-25T11:11:00.003+05:30

Divorce is a very traumatic experience. Whoever faces it, tends to break up emotionally too. It is the time when you most need your friends, family and well-wishers nearby. To be able to cope up with the loss it is important to forget and loosen up a bit. I’m sure it is not the easiest thing to do and may take up months to be able to come out of it completely. But you have to remember that life doesn’t stop with your divorce. Life offers a package of experiences both sweet and sour. It depends on how you take things.

Post-divorce it become very difficult for the divorcee to have an optimistic look. But that is the way things should be! You’ve got to have an optimistic approach towards life. You must ready yourself up for a new beginning. Instead of thinking, ‘This is the end’, it’s always fruitful to think, ‘Whatever happened, happened for my good. Now let me start afresh’!

We all know that spending a whole life alone without a partner is not a joke. You might be having second thoughts of starting a new relationship now but sooner or later you will realize the importance of having a life partner. Life partner shares with you all your sorrows and happiness and makes life beautiful and worth living!

So after you’ve gotten over the trauma of breaking up with your ex husband/wife it’s time to build new relationships and find yourself a new partner!

So as you set out to start afresh it’s very important for you to open the doors of your heart for the new special one. Start socializing. If you love going to parties or clubbing, even better!

In the beginning you might lack confidence; it’s okay if you feel so. This happens with everyone. Don’t fear rejection. Know that you are worthy of a great life partner. Your last relationship was not the best among all, but nothing to worry about! You’ll soon find for yourself the perfect Mr./Ms. Right. You just have to remember one thing, which is not to repeat the same old mistakes that you made in your last relationship. You won’t want this relationship to end in disaster.

As you find your new partner, enjoy every moment of this new found love. Give you best shot and the relationship WILL turn out to be successful!

The big relationship mistakes

2011-05-24T12:01:00.003+05:30

A relationship such as marriage is full of both bitter and sweet moments. The sweet ones must be savoured and the bitter ones must be forgotten in order to have a healthy relationship. Many couples do their best and cooperate well for a long lasting relationships but some fail to understand where the problem lies.

Here is a guide that will take you through the big mistakes in a relationship that many people possibly fail to notice or miss out on.

The first mistake is when personal debt and loans management is not properly handled. The finances need to be well handled and discussed about. If any of the two messes up finances or is not serious about paying off debts then serious problems may occur between the two.

Friends are a very important part of one’s life and they must be there in all phases. Leaving or ignoring friends by any of the partner due to the other is not fair. Both the partners must get their fair share of spending some time off with friends. Just because you have got married doesn’t mean you’ll ignore your long time friends.

The third problem creating issue is ignoring the in-laws. If you are a guy it doesn’t mean that you will not talk to in-laws every now and then and will take help of excuses such as ‘I don’t get time these days’. Both husband and the wife need to give some time to their in-laws. If you are a working woman, catch up with your in-laws on the weekend. Call them up and see if they’re alright.

Another issue that may spoil a beautiful relationship is lack of sex. You must take time off from your busy schedule and cosy up with each other. A good sex life maintains the spark in a relationship making it last lifelong.

Ego is something that often creates troubles in a relationship. There is no harm in saying ‘sorry’, after all he/she is your spouse. A ‘sorry’ will not mean that you lost a war it means that you want to end the matter and patch up. Your spouse will take it sportingly.

So try avoiding all the above problems and see your relationship become sweeter than ever before.

The Generation Gap

2011-05-24T11:54:00.003+05:30

When a child enters his/her teenage and becomes an adolescent, he starts believing in his own ideas and develops a specific opinion of life, people, and their behaviour and starts acting according to it. This new changed behaviour differs a great deal from that of the parents. This is the gap of difference of opinion that is famously called the ‘Generation Gap’.

For some parents and their adolescent children, it becomes very difficult to bridge the gap. This gap increases over the period of time and brings bitterness in the sweet relationship parents and the child share.

Thus, it is important to bridge this gap to avoid fallouts. For this, both have to understand and learn to adjust a little bit here and there. Given below is a guide for both parents and adolescents to help lessen the huge gap that gets created.

For Parents-

It is important for parents to accept that their child is growing now. He/she is heading towards becoming a mature individual and will soon become an adult.

Try giving your child chances to take decisions on his/her own.

Be a guide and not a dictator.

If you think your child is going wrong somewhere, put forth your opinion with some valid reasoning and leave it to the child to decide and think about it. Your liberal and much friendly approach will pleasantly surprise the child and encourage him/her to think about it and most probably follow it.

You have to accept that now your child is half the way into becoming an adult so involve him/her into discussions about the family or decisions involving anything to be bought for the house.

Let him/her know about your finances and tell that you are sharing all this because you think that he/she is mature enough to understand and that you feel the need to share this with them. This will help them become more aware and understand financial matters.

If your adolescent child insists on a sleepover with a friend you can allow that sometimes after checking that his/her company is harmless and that the parents live in too.

In adolescence, the child goes through lot of peer pressure. Help him/her deal with it effectively.

Whenever there is a discussion regarding any matter listen to his/her side of the story patiently and not just condemn it there and then. You have to understand that a child goes through lot of mental and physical changes and dealing with them is not a cakewalk.

Support your child and stand for him/her assuring you are always there to guide and share things with.

Be mentally prepared for changes in his/her behaviour and habits and try dealing with them patiently if they require your attention.

For Adolescents-

Adolescence is the time when you are growing up and heading towards becoming an adult. This means more maturity and sensibility.

It is okay if you are growing up but that doesn’t mean you will ignore your parent’s experience of life and their worldly wisdom. You are still in the growing stage.

Respect you parents. Have reverence for their opinions and guidance.

Treat your parents as your friends. Share things with them. It is also important to know your limits. You can’t take them for granted.

Sleepovers and parties do happen but adjustments are also important. Sometimes they will agree to your wish and sometimes you have to do the same. It is okay to adjust here and there for them. After all they are your parents.

Sit down with your parents and sort out things if you are having difference of opinion. Don’t just start throwing tantrums. This is not the way an adult behaves and you are half way through it.

If you think your parents aren’t able to understand your point of view, explain to them politely with valid reasons.

Instead of going in to extremes always take the middle way out. Arguing is pointless, aim for healthy discussions that lead to fruitful conclusions.

For both parents and children, adolescence is the time for becoming best of friends. So enjoy this phase in a healthy spirit and bridge the ‘Generation Gap’.

Rules of fighting

2011-05-23T11:48:00.003+05:30

Can you think of any relationship in which fights don’t take place? Your answer will surely be a no. Irrespective of the severity of the fight, it does take place in all relationships, with all the people at some or the other point of time. By fight, I do not mean physical abuse. Fight, as I would want to put, means any kind of dispute, a heated argument due to difference of opinions or thoughts, or a small quarrel.

Fights take place when two people do not agree on a common decision, thought, action or choice of words of their partner. In such a situation, if one of the two people doesn’t calm down the severity of the discussion or argument may shoot up. When the argument starts getting heated up it leads to various kind of consequences, like the two not talking to each other for hours, days, weeks or even months! Nobody likes to face such a situation wherein they’ve had an ugly fight with their loved ones. Therefore, it’s always better if some rules are laid down. Now you might be thinking, who thinks of rules before starting a fight? The answer to this question is simple. Sit down with your partner and discuss some ground rules that you are going to follow no matter what.

Remember by setting a few rules of fighting, you are deciding the dos and don’ts of fights. For example few of them could be:

We are not going to drag our Ex-s in our fights.

We are not going to discuss our last fight during this fight.

We are not going to digress from the main topic being discussed.

We are not going to use any word that might hurt any of us (and we know exactly what will hurt the other one).

We are not going to sleep over the issue. We shall discuss it and end it there and then so that we can sleep peacefully at night.

We are not going to fight in front of our children.

We are not going to drag our parents in the fight.

We are not going to count on good things that we have done for each other and blackmail each other.

We are never ever going to show repentance on our decision of marrying our partner (as we know we are made for each other!).

We are never going to swear on anything nor are we going to ask the other person amongst us to swear on anything.

And last but not the least – We are never going to break these rules!

Rules like these can be set between a husband and a wife well in advance so that they don’t regret later. There is no need to worry if you had not done that before. If you really believe in the saying “It’s never too late”, then do it today. Discuss with each other, lay down your rules of fighting and then stick to it!