How To Get Back With Ex: Magic of Making Up System

How To Be A Confident Girlfriend Without Being Over Confident

2009-12-14T20:30:00.000-08:00

How to be a confident girlfriend is something every woman needs to learn to be. There are very few men out there who like a woman who is lacking in self confidence. They tend to be needy and always need reassuring. This can be quite a turn off when it goes on for any length of time.

Sure we all have days when we feel awful. I am positive that even Carmen Electra wakes up some mornings feeling less than gorgeous but you do not need to tell the world about it. Men love confident women as they know that when they get them into bed, they won't be afraid to ask for what they want. Also confidence is power and some men love powerful women. But don't go overboard as confidence does not mean that you have to be arrogant. Yes there is a fine line but it is one that doesn't need to be crossed.

So how do you build your self esteem? You can do this in a number of ways but the most effective is to practice positive thinking. It is hard to feel low and ugly when you are walking around with a big smile on your face. Make a list of your good points and see how many things you have to feel grateful for. Be genuinely thankful for what you do have as then you may see even more of the positives that are already part of your life.

If you experienced something in your life that has affected your confidence then get some help. Counseling is a wonderful way of working through past demons and learning how to leave the past where it belongs i.e. behind you. You can't change what happened but you can change your reaction to these events and how it affects your future.

Fake it for a while. Pretend you are the most confident woman in the world. Your subconscious can't tell the difference between a lie and the truth so if you fake it for long enough, you will start believing and your self esteem levels will improve.

Ask your man why he is with you but not in a whiny type of way. You can ask him to tell you what he most loves about you? What he thinks your best assets are? Also choose your moment with care, this is not a post sex question.

Ask your friends to write down a list of your nicest characteristics. I am sure you will be pleasantly surprised at how people value you and what qualities they think you have. Practice being assertive and reward yourself for the successes you have achieved in life. If there is something you are really afraid of, why not try it today?

Perhaps you are afraid of heights, so try booking a hang gliding course. Ask your boyfriend to come with you. Maybe do it as a charity fundraiser. Once you face your fears and conquer them, you will no longer have to ask how to be a confident girlfriend. Your inner self confidence will shine like a beacon.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

How To Be A Sweet Girlfriend Without Being Mushy

2009-12-14T20:29:00.000-08:00

If you are anything like me, you may have wondered how to be a sweet girlfriend. I am quite fiery and hot tempered so you wouldn't normally describe me as being sweet. But seemingly men like that and sometimes quite a lot.

So what do you need to do? You do not need to go as far as waiting for him at the front door when he comes home but it comes close. You need to show your man some affection and I don't mean in the bedroom although we will come to that later. Men like cuddles but only when appropriate, i.e. in private. Public displays of affection tend to embarrass them.

Try taking the initiative and spice up your sex life but subtly is the key. For example, if you know he is having a hard time at work, why not surprise him with a massage one evening. Light the candles, slip into something more comfortable and heat up the massage oil. The temperature is guaranteed to rise.

Cook him his favorite meal and clean up afterwards letting him have the night off. In other words spoil him to distraction although after a while he may wonder if you are up to something.

Tease him when you are out in public. If you are at a restaurant, give his hand a massage under the table and watch how he tries to hold his concentration on the conversation. Send him cheeky I owe you messages such as a promise to dress up in his favorite outfit or do something naughty to really turn him on.

Surprise him with a weekend away. Men love surprises too but often are expected to be the ones to arrange them. This way you are showing him you fully understand how to be a sweet girlfriend.

Show consideration to his mates. If you live together, invite them round one evening and leave them some beers, food and dips to enjoy with the game. Your man will be very impressed and his friends will be envious.

You may be reading this thinking that I have taken things too far but the fact is that if you don't learn how to be a sweet girlfriend at least some of the time you are unlikely to progress to being a wife. In fact your progression will probably be to the status of ex girlfriend. That of course is fine if you do want to lose the man in your life but seeing as you asked the question I am guessing that's not the case. If you have a history of not making relationships work, perhaps now you have discovered why.

Do yourself a favor and start practicing now before it is too late. It is a lot easier to try to impress your boyfriend than it is to impress your ex.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

How To Be A Challenge To Your Girlfriend And Put Zing In Your Romance

2009-12-12T15:32:00.000-08:00

Why are you wondering how to be a challenge to your girlfriend? Is it because you are afraid you are about to be dumped? Women often like their men to be a tough nut to crack. They seem to respect those men who are not afraid to live their life their way more than the man who agrees with everything they say. Sure they may complain their boyfriends are awkward but underneath they like it.

So how do you become a challenge? You can't take this too far or you will end up being dumped very quickly which I am guessing is not the result you are looking for. If you think your partner is taking you for granted, become a little less available. The next time she rings or texts to arrange last minute plans be unavailable. Have alternative arrangements in place even if it means you are washing your hair. She will slowly get the message that you have a life and while she is important to you, she may not be the axis your world turns on.

If you are always the one to initiate nights out, try taking a back seat and see what happens. Will she organize things instead or give you an ear bashing. If you send her flowers every week, skip one and see what her reaction is. I am not suggesting you start ignoring the woman in your life but if you have been acting like a doormat it is time to change. It is nice for a man to pay for dinner on the first date but you shouldn't always have to pay particularly if you have similar incomes. If you earn less than her, she should definitely be paying her way some of the time.

Arrange nights out with your own friends and go alone. Even people involved in a couple deserve a night out alone every so often. Your girlfriend may not like it but so long as you behave yourself why shouldn't you go without her.

You do not need to radically change your personality and become someone you are not. That will only make you uncomfortable. In answering how to be a challenge to your girlfriend, you are looking to make small changes to put the spice back into the relationship. If you always concentrate on her pleasure in the bedroom, start becoming a little more demanding. If you always initiate sex, take a back seat for a little while and let her worry about why you are not as eager as you once were.

Women do not like men behaving like puppies i.e. all eager to please and bouncing around the place. It may be fun for a little while but most girls will eventually get bored with your behavior as it is too predictable. A new man will come along who offers them a challenge and they will dump you. If you love this woman, you need to learn the secrets of a successful relationship and soon as otherwise you will be single again.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

How To Be A Girlfriend Without Driving Him Away

2009-12-12T15:29:00.000-08:00

Isn't it funny what we wonder about? I mean if you are thinking about how to be a girlfriend, it would suggest that something isn't working in your relationship. Or perhaps you thought it was working but you have just been dumped.

Hollywood makes having a perfect relationship seem so easy. In fact all the famous love stories do i.e. Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Pretty Woman all finish when the couple get together. They don't hang around for the difficult part i.e. when she discovers he snores in bed and puts his dirty socks under the bed rather than in the laundry. He finds out that she may be gorgeous but has a wicked temper and is quite demanding at times.

So what do you have to do to be a great girlfriend? You must accept your man for who he is. Far too many women get involved with "Mr ok but will soon change him to be Mr right". That is insulting for both of you. He doesn't deserve to be your pet project but deserves someone who will accept him for who he currently is. But you are also letting yourself down by settling for second best. It would be better not to be a girlfriend than to be the nagging partner no man wants.

You can be part of a couple and have an independent life. Some women find a man and then spend all their time with him. While it is normal to enjoy spending time with the man in your life, you need to have some time away too if only to have something to talk about when you do meet up. Men appreciate space and time with their mates. When he is having some time out, don't keep texting him as he will think you are stalking him.

Have conversations with your man rather than one sided lectures. It is difficult for most men to get excited about the latest plot on a soap opera or what the current fashion is. Try to talk about topics that interest the both of you and every so often shut up and let him talk as well. God gave you one mouth and two ears for a reason, use them in proportion.

Just because your man wants you as his girlfriend doesn't mean that he is going to fall in love with your family and friends too. So long as he is polite to them, don't push him into being anything else. Relationships develop over time but there is a chance he may never like your best mate. That is life and you can't change it.

Always be honest with your man and for goodness sake drop the mind games. Whoever told a woman that men are intrigued by mind games obviously drank too much alcohol.

There is a tried and tested recipe for success in all relationships. I am guessing you are not sure what it is if you are asking how to be a girlfriend. Don't you think now would be a good time to find out?

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

How To Be A Better Girlfriend Before Danger Creeps In

2009-12-10T13:34:00.000-08:00

How to be a better girlfriend is something us women ask a lot. When you initially get together it is easy to keep the spark alive. You have so much to explore and learn about each other and the sexual attraction should also be very strong. But when you have been together for a while, the initial lust factor has probably reduced somewhat and you know as much as there is to know. Life can get a little mundane and this is when danger can creep in. Most relationships break up due to lack of communication rather than a major problem like having an affair.

So you start wondering how to be a better girlfriend? Perhaps there are some good books you could read to help you spice up your love life. Or, if it is your thing, why not surprise him with a movie? You could make your own but don't go overboard as these things have a habit of reappearing when you least want them to. Just ask Paris Hilton!

Becoming a better lover is something we tend to leave to the men to worry about but it is a two way street. And for such a little word, sex can cause major problems for any couple. But it is not just about sex. There is an urban myth going around which seems to suggest that men don't do affection. While they may not do public displays, most love being cuddled or caressed in the comfort of their own homes.

Men like to be appreciated too. So why not think up a couple of things you could do for him. For example, you could try getting him seats to a game for him and a mate if it is not your thing. Not only are you telling him that you want him to enjoy himself but you also trust him to go out without you and have a great time. This is important as often men can feel trapped without us women realizing it. While we want to spend every minute with the man we love, often they couldn't imagine anything worse. It is not that they don't appreciate us but sometimes men need some space. Give him lots of this and he will happily nominate you for girlfriend of the year award.

Men also like their women to be respectful especially when around other men. Now don't get me wrong, I am not suggesting for a second that you head back to the 50's and have his pipe and slippers ready and waiting. What I mean is that they don't like their partner to put them down when their friends are around, or to act coarse and unladylike. It is never attractive when a woman acts like a dockworker but it is even worse when you do so in front of an audience.

So stop wondering how to be a better girlfriend and go apply these tips. If you are still concerned it would be worth investing in some additional relationship coaching to make sure you keep yours in tip top condition.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

How To Be Affectionate With Your Girlfriend and Keep Her

2009-12-10T00:32:00.000-08:00

Falling out of love can happen to all couples regardless of how strong their relationship was. In order to recover the magic, you need to learn how to be affectionate with your girlfriend. There are different ways of learning. You can ask an older man in a successful relationship for some advice. You could talk to your friends but do yourself a favor and only listen to the ones that are happily involved. The others are single for a reason. Or you could buy a great book, read it and put the theory into practice.

Women are often complex creatures but the majority just love it when you show affection. Now I mean real affection and not just a pre sex hug. Sex is a different animal to men and women. In a committed relationship, women often use sex to show affection and appreciation whereas men are less likely to think that deeply about it. They may just care whether it is any good or not or if it is even available. If a woman is hurt or upset you can usually gauge it from the warmth of the response she shows to your advances. If she usually initiates making love but hasn't, you can bet a dollar there is something wrong. It may not be your fault but she may be holding you responsible anyway.

If you read any decent book giving advice on relationships, you will know that one way to get more sex is to do more around the house and not leave everything to your other half. Another way is to show her affection when she least expects it. Hold her hand while on a walk, carry her shopping, collect her from work if it is raining or buy her flowers even though it isn't her birthday or your anniversary. Arrange to spend time together doing something that the two of you love.

Most romantic partnerships don't break down because of affairs or other huge events but because the little things are missing. If you feel that you are drifting apart, get some help and advice on how to put everything back on course. Don't ignore the signs of unhappiness hoping they will go away. Women can easily feel ignored and taken for granted and you may only be distracted by your job or financial situation. She may feel that you must have another woman in your life as you aren't interested in her any more. Or perhaps she is feeling used. Be honest, is the only time you show her affection those nights when you are hoping sex is on the menu?

So how do you get the love back into your relationship? There are many ways but perhaps one you could try is to pretend you are dating again. How did you treat your partner when you just met? She is still with you, for now anyway, so you must have done something right.

You need to find out now how to be affectionate with your girlfriend or you just might find someone else has been!

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

How To Be Nice To Your Girlfriend And Make Her Happier

2009-12-08T20:09:00.001-08:00

If you are wondering how to be nice to your girlfriend you have probably picked up some signs that it is not all rosy in your relationship. You must act fast as she may get fed up and decide to become your ex.

Ideally you should read a few books on relationships in order to get the full picture but I will try to give you a snapshot now. You need to treat the woman in your life with respect. If you are living together, then do not expect her to do everything around the house. Sure, she may be a better cook than you are but that doesn't mean that you can't do dinner some evenings. Or you could let her cook but be the one to set the table and tidy away afterwards.

Some men appear to have a gift for instinctively knowing how to treat a woman, for the rest of us it can be a little more complicated. At least it was until I read up on some techniques. My girlfriend was amazed. In fact it almost backfired as she thought another woman was teaching me how to behave! Not the result I was hoping for but thank goodness once I showed her my latest reading material she believed me. In fact she was very impressed I cared enough to be trying to learn new skills. Seemingly I hadn't been showing I was interested in our relationship prior to this. I thought I was doing everything right, I took her out to dinner, brought her flowers and some jewelry but according to her I had forgotten how to listen. And that is more important than my over the top gestures!

Obviously it will depend on what the situation is with your relationship. If you are asking how to be nice to your girlfriend you are obviously worried that you are missing something. Why not try sitting down with your partner and asking her how she is feeling. Ask her if she is happy or is there something wrong? Some women like gestures whereas others, like my girlfriend simply wanted my attention but to talk not to do other stuff! I found out that women like to chat even if there is nothing important to say. They actually enjoy talking to us and listening to our views so long as we also listen to them. But they hate when we try to fix every problem. Just because they tell us they are having an issue at work or with a friend, doesn't mean that they want us to solve it for them. They may just want reassurance they are handling the situation properly by themselves. They may simply be using you as a sounding board.

If you want to still be together when you are old and grey, you need to learn how to communicate properly. Then you won't be wondering how to be nice to your girlfriend.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

How To Be Romantic With Your Girlfriend And Be A Winner

2009-12-08T14:56:00.000-08:00

It is no wonder we are confused as sometimes our good intention are met with obvious disapproval. Like the last time I bought my partner roses. She was going out on a night out and I thought she would be really surprised. She was but all I got was earache and sore arms. She kept wondering what I had done that I had to buy her red roses and guess who got to carry the bunch around all night. So my expensive gesture fell flat on its face and didn't improve things at all. She blamed me for ruining her night out and we ended up having another blazing row. In hindsight it was a little silly sending her flowers to her office when I knew she was going out on the town that Friday night.

These are the types of mistakes I used to make all the time. Instead of making my relationship happier, it only led to more rows. In desperation I started to buy women's magazines to see if I could get any insight into her mind but that didn't work and I sure got some funny looks down at the Mall. Eventually I bit the bullet and bought a relationship course.

You see I didn't know that there is a recipe for relationship success. Sure some people have it without resorting to books but these people are in the minority. Others, like me, are constantly wondering why they get it wrong so often. It can get so bad that you end up wondering whether they are with the wrong partner. But the truth is that communication between the two sexes isn't always easy. There are plenty of mixed messages and confusing signals.

Men usually don't find talking easy whereas it would seem that women have to talk all the time. You need to listen when they want to chat; in fact they find this romantic. Grand gestures like the red roses are easy to arrange. You just phone the florist and give them your credit card number. It takes a lot more effort to clean the house and cook a special dinner as a surprise for when she gets home. Or if you have kids, find a babysitter and take your partner out for the evening.

Why do you think so many couples who appear well suited break up? They haven't all had affairs. In fact if you ask them why they have broken up, they usually can't tell you but more often than not they want to get back with their ex. But you will often find that they haven't spent any time on their own together recently.

Let me tell you if you think it is difficult to answer how to be romantic with your girlfriend, you should try doing it when she is your ex! So don't make the same mistakes I did. Get a blueprint to having a successful happy relationship today and soon all your friends will be asking you for relationship advice.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

Beating The Break-Up Blues

2009-12-06T18:35:00.000-08:00

Break-ups are the worst.

You feel all out of sorts because life as you've known it prior to the break-up gets turned all upside down, and chances are you're not quite sure which way is up right now.

While I do understand how painful breaking up can be, there are a few things you can do to help transition back into at least a semblance of “normal” life.

The key is to put your focus on something else.

It may take a little time, but doing this will take some of the edge off the pain you're feeling and let you move on through life without having to deal with a lot of the blocks and re-starts some folks can't seem to get past.

Instead, they get stuck in “life without him/her mode” and have a hard time moving forward.

Don't let this happen to you.

Break-up's are painful, yes. But the truth is, the world hasn't ended, even if it does tend to feel like yours is falling apart at the moment. Life will and does go on – with or without you.

You, however, are a survivor. You won't stay trapped in the past, because you'll be moving forward.

For the first few weeks, it may be best if you don't go to the places you and s/he often frequented together, and don't try to hang out with what should be mutual friends.

You can pick up these extended relationships later, but for now, concentrate on things you know make you feel good that do not have a connection to him/her.

If you have trouble coming up with something to focus on, take some time to think about the kinds of things you enjoyed before you began your relationship.

Did you have a hobby you've kind of let go? Was there something you were passionate about before you and s/he met? Really give it some thought, and then start to do those things.

The more involved you become in doing things that make you feel good, the better you will feel. In time (faster than you think) you'll be able to call on those friends you and s/he both enjoyed spending time with, and even face-to-face meetings with your ex will be easier to handle.

Just remember to put your focus on doing things that make you feel good, and you'll beat those break-up blues in no time!

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

How To Make Him Or Her Fall In Love Again

2009-12-05T14:51:00.000-08:00

Things getting a little boring in your relationship? Feeling like every day is the same as the day before? How would you like to bring back the excitement and fun you felt when you first fell in love? Think it's impossible? It's not.

See, if you know why a person fell in love with you in the first place, you know how to make that person fall in love with you all over again, as many times as you want – even forever! The trick is figuring out why your mate fell in love with you from the start.

How do you do that? You ask. Bear in mind asking, “Why do you love me?” isn't the best question to ask in this instance. If you don't believe me, ask your mom why she loves your dad. She'll likely say (like most people) “I don't know exactly why I love him, I just do.”

But the truth is that people fall in love with someone because of how that someone makes them feel about themselves. So if you want to find out exactly what it was that started it all, way back when, ask your partner what it was you made them feel, about themselves, when they first began to fall in love with you.

Maybe you made him feel like he was the most sexy man on the planet, or you made her feel like she was intelligent and interesting. In any case, whatever you made them feel about themselves, it's a sure indication feeling that way makes them very happy.

Knowing what makes your partner very happy, what makes him/her feel really good about themselves makes helping them to fall in love with you again a pretty simple operation.

How? Because once you know how you made your significant other feel about him/herself when your relationship first began, you'll have the key to unlocking those feelings of falling in love again over and over in your lives, as many times as you want.

So go ahead and try it today. Ask your partner, “How did I make you feel, about yourself, when we were dating or when we first met?” Then, once you have the answer, do whatever you need to do to recreate that feeling.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

First Step Toward A Second Chance

2009-12-04T15:17:00.001-08:00

The first thing you need to do if you've lost the love of your life is communicate – with yourself. You need to get clear in your own head on what is really going on by ignoring all the noise. Forget the arguments, forget the fights and just get to the heart of the matter.

You'll have to be brutally honest with yourself here because what you're searching for is the truth. You want to dig past the clutter and the excuses and pinpoint the true reason or reasons your relationship began to go south.

Don't gloss over the little things, because often it is simply a combination of so many little things piled one on top of the other with no one ever going back to apologize and make things right that add up to one seemingly unmovable Big Thing.

Many times these small mountains of little things, too long ignored, make a relationship start to sour. If they keep adding up, things go bad a lot faster. So really think about the life of your relationship, and be honest with yourself about what really happened. What were the core events or words that put a hitch in the smooth turn of the wheel?

Once you've pinpointed all the things you feel are the likely culprits for pushing your relationship to take a turn for the worst, your next step is to communicate with your ex. Let him or her know that you want to sort out all the problems, get them out in the open and talk about them so you can figure out, together, what went wrong in your relationship because you never want to repeat these mistakes again.

Here's a valuable hint to remember during these communications: Discuss does not mean argue. If you can't act like a mature, responsible adult for the duration of a simple, single conversation to help make your relationship better now, how can you possibly expect to have a meaningful, long-term relationship?

So the next step is to find out what he or she thinks started the damage to your relationship. The point is for each of you to know what the other feels caused the relationship to go bad so you both will know exactly what needs working on – by both parties – to fix the relationship.

Next, ask if your partner feels your relationship has a chance, if they are interested (like you) in trying to change things for the better, working together to build a better life together, and then decide if you're both willing and able to do what you now know it will take to make the necessary changes and put the relationship back on track.

Communication is one of the cornerstones of all meaningful relationships. If you haven't been communicating with your partner, that could be one part of the problem. Make sure he or she knows you now understand this and that from here on out, you will definitely want to discuss your problems with each other, as well as possible solutions.

Why? Because by doing this, by communicating openly and honestly with each other about your hopes, fears, expectations and whatnot, both of you will be better equipped to make your relationship much better than it has ever been, to make your relationship the kind that lasts forever.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

First Step Toward A Second Chance

2009-12-04T15:17:00.000-08:00

Do I Still Love My Ex

2009-12-03T17:01:00.000-08:00

Emotions are quite difficult for many people to understand. This is because many emotions and feelings are very personal issues, ones which are not often discussed. So, it is easy to see how a great number of people can be confused about their feelings for their exes. In fact, it is not unusual for someone to wonder, "Do I still love my ex?"--even for months or years after the relationship has ended.

Figuring out your feelings for your ex can help you to move on to new and more successful relationships. Any unresolved emotions dealing with your ex could actually impact your future relationships--and not in a good way. Once you figure out whether or not you still love your ex, you will be able to deal with the issue and then move on from there.

How can you determine what your feelings are for your ex? Take a look at the following questions and think about your answers. Your answers will tell you what you feel for your ex.

• Do you feel a strong desire to see your ex?

If you still love your ex, you likely want to see your ex or talk to your ex on the phone quite often. Perhaps you have called your ex’s voice mail just to hear his or her voice, or maybe you have driven by your ex’s house or place of work in hopes of seeing him or her outside. Or, you may have "accidentally" bumped into your ex at a restaurant or bar.

• How often do you think about your ex?

If you still love your ex, chances are he or she is on your mind constantly. Whenever a love song comes on the radio or whenever you happen to see a romantic scene on the television or in the movies, you immediately think of your ex. When something interesting or upsetting happens in your life, the first person you think to call is your ex.

• How does it feel to think about your ex being with someone else?

If you are still in love with your ex, the thought of him or her being with someone else probably makes you feel very jealous. The very idea of it might make you feel sick inside, or it may make you feel angry at the other person. You may even feel possessive, as if the other person is on your turf, stealing ‘your’ ex.

Have you figured out how you feel about your ex? Did you decide that yes, I still love my ex? It wouldn’t be surprising--most people who wonder about their feelings for their exes do still have some strings attached which need to be addressed.

You need to make a decision--do you want to get back together with your ex or do you want to get over your ex? Think about this carefully, and then do a search for more information on whichever option you choose.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

Heartbroken Sayings Can Comfort And Inspire You

2009-12-02T15:49:00.000-08:00

Sometimes our own words do not suffice. Finding the right words to truly express how we feel can be difficult, especially if you have been unlucky in love. Using heartbroken sayings can be comforting and help you not feel as alone as you learn how others have coped with loss and have expressed how they feel.

Quotes about heartbreak are numerous and can be quite eloquent or even funny. Here are some notable heartbroken sayings and hopefully they will help you:

- “Love is never lost. If not reciprocated, it will flow back and soften and purify the heart.” – Washington Irving. Coming from the man who wrote the Legend of Sleepy Hollow, this is a surprising sentiment, but it offers a positive spin on unrequited love.

- “If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they're yours; if they don't they never were.” – Richard Bach. This is a famous love quote that offers some comfort if you have loved and lost. Setting them free can also be interpreted also as giving them some space rather than your relationship breaking up completely.

- “What is the opposite of two? A lonely me, a lonely you.” - Richard Wilbur. This quote makes a simple but eloquent statement. This makes the point that there were two of you in the relationship, so each of you has suffered the heartbreak of breaking up. This is easy to forget if you only focus on how you are feeling.

- “Sadness flies away on the wings of time.” - Jean de La Fontaine. What you are feeling right now will not last forever even though it may not feel like that now. Make sure to allow yourself time to grieve the loss of a relationship. Moving on too quickly can be more detrimental in the long run.

- “Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.” - Charlie Brown. Leave it to Charles Schultz to describe a feeling so simply. With such a simple statement, we can all understand the sentiment behind the quote easily.

- “Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.” - Author Unknown. While our first instinct is to do everything we can to mend the relationship, sometimes it is better that it ends as that may cause more heartbreak.

- “I don't know why they call it heartbreak. It feels like every other part of my body is broken too.” - Missy Altijd. Love lost can affect you in many ways, including feeling pain throughout your body along with the emotional pain. What we project mentally can manifest physically. If you decide to project positivity, it can help ease your pain.

- “Count the garden by the flowers, never by the leaves that fall. Count your life with smiles and not the tears that roll.” - Author Unknown. This is a reminder to count our blessings and while we may be hurting from a break up, we should still value the relationship we lost.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

I Want My Husband Back Some Tips For Reconciliation

2009-12-01T14:26:00.000-08:00

If you are separated from your husband physically or emotionally, the thought of the failure of your relationship can be unbearable. You do not want to give up on your marriage, so all you think is I want my husband back. Depending on the extent of the problems between the two of you, reconciliation can be difficult but not impossible.

You may have tried everything that you can think of to get him back to no avail. Here are some other ideas to consider to help you reach your goal of reconciliation.

1. Give him some space. Some men feel limited in their marriage, like they are boxed in. The more limitations he feels are placed on him may make him distant and emotionally unavailable due to this feeling. By having a little freedom to tinker in the garage, watch sports or hang out with the guys on a regular basis, your husband will appreciate it and enjoy the time he spends with you and your family more.

2. Limit contact. If you are separated from your husband, keep your contact with him to a minimum. This is important because it will give him a chance to work through his feelings of the separation. While your separation has been very upsetting to you, it can be just as upsetting to him. You may be thinking I want my husband back so I need to talk to him and reason with him to pull your marriage together, but constant contact could prove to be more divisive than helpful. By limiting contact, you give both of you the time you need to step back and look at your situation objectively and make positive changes that can bring you together again.

3. Be introspective. Regardless of who is at fault for the problems in your marriage, both of you need to work together to mend your relationship. Be objective and take a look at your faults. Think about what you can do or changes you can make that can bring you together. This can involve being a better listener, nagging less or showing your husband more attention.

4. Set priorities. Your relationship with your husband may have deteriorated due to your work or other commitments outside of your home. Find ways to make time for your husband and show him how important he is to you. It is also important for him to do the same for you. As determined as you may to get your husband back, unless you both work towards a resolution it will not happen.

5. Listen. When he is ready to talk, make sure that you listen to everything he has to say as objectively as possible. Address any questions he has directly and communicate your feelings clearly to him. Have an honest discussion with him and make sure that he feels that he is heard and understood. This is an emotional situation that you are in, however be as calm as possible as getting upset will not be helpful.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

Dont Want Divorce Dont Consider It

2009-11-30T12:54:00.000-08:00

No one goes into their marriage wanting to fail. Many couples dont want divorce because they believe that it equals failure. New facts and figures now state that if divorce is not considered when problems arise in a marriage that couples can resolve their issues and have a stronger marriage.

If you are having problems and are considering divorce, make sure to try to find alternatives that promote fixing the problems via open and truthful communication or marriage counseling. This is preferable over the pain and effort involved in divorcing your spouse.

When others hear that you are having marriage trouble, many couples get unsolicited advice from friends and coworkers that they really dont want. Divorce to others can be seen as a quick fix when in truth it can simply add to your problems rather than fixing them. While you appreciate the support and advice offered by your friends, keep in mind that this is your marriage, not theirs.

By looking at statistics, 80 percent of surveyed couples who at one time considered divorce and subsequently decided not to go through with it claimed to be happily married years later. This can be explained by two possible outcomes. The first is that the couples who previously were considering divorce decided to deal with their problems directly. In doing so, it not only acknowledged their problems but it may have resulted in their finding effective solutions that saved their marriage.

The second is that when divorce was considered that it can change the entire dynamic of a relationship. For some couples this could be a positive thing or it could be detrimental to others. If a problem develops, those considering a divorce could see this as a way out without ever dealing with the issue directly. If these problems grow or the issues faced become more divisive, the option of divorce can be seen as an easy out and therefore become very appealing.

However, those who did not consider a divorce may find some success. They are forced to deal with their problems, and possibly find a constructive solution and common ground. Although this can be hard work and is not as easy as a divorce appears to be in fixing problems, working together and facing issues can be much more rewarding.

Marriage is a team of two players. When both players are actively working towards solutions to their problems and remove divorce as an option, resolutions can be found for their differences. This will strengthen their marriage as you will be working towards something better rather than looking for a way to cut your losses and run.

If you remove divorce as an option and resolve to work through your differences, you can make your marriage work. It will give you the motivation to work to improve your relationship through understanding and communication. By listening to each other and finding ways to compromise that benefit the both of you; you can build a marriage that will last for years to come.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

Can Marriage Counseling Save A Marriage In Crisis

2009-11-29T15:10:00.000-08:00

Every marriage goes through ups and downs. A number of marriages also go through times of severe turmoil, such as deaths in the family, chronic illnesses, unfaithfulness, or national disasters. Some marriages hold strong during any ups and downs; others begin to crumble. For any marriage in crisis, however, marital counseling can help.

Each couple’s marriage is, of course, unique. Therefore, the way in which that couple deals with problems and issues will be unique. However, there are several signs which are common to all marriages--signs which point toward trouble brewing in the relationship. The earlier a couple begins to recognize the signs, the earlier the couple can begin marriage counseling. And, the sooner the couple starts counseling, the better the couple’s chances of saving their marriage.

Here are the common warning signs of a marriage that is likely headed toward crisis:

• The couple bickers, nags, and nitpicks a great deal.

• The couple doesn’t fight fairly.

• The couple tends to spend a good deal of time apart, doing activities separately because that is more fun than spending time together.

• The couple doesn’t talk about problems together. One member of the couple may be unaware of household issues or problems with the children that the other couple member handles, for instance.

• The couple no longer agrees on long-term goals and values, either for themselves or for the family as a whole.

• The couple has a low level of intimacy--or none.

• The couple doesn’t talk much. The two members of the couple may be unaware of significant events or happenings at each other’s workplaces, for example.

Marriage counseling can help couples who are having any of the above issues. Counseling can also assist couples who are in crisis for other reasons. There is no reason for a couple to stay in an unhappy marriage; yet people who head straight for separation or divorce without trying to first make the marriage work through the use of marital counseling may be throwing in the towel without giving their marriage a fair chance.

Professional marriage counselors have experience in working with couples who have gone through all types of difficulties. Counselors can assist couples in dealing with infidelity, spending issues, problems with family and children, differences in faith, and much more.

Couples who attend marriage counseling learn the following:

• How to resolve conflict through effective listening
• How to state needs clearly and openly without anger or resentment
• How to get what is needed in the relationship without making demands
• How to work through unresolved issues in the marriage
• How to understand the needs of both members of the couple--and how to meet those needs

Marriage counseling works best if couples go as soon as they begin having problems in their marriage. A marriage in crisis can be helped with marital counseling; however, if a couple waits too long to seek counseling, their chances of saving their marriage may not be as great.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

She Broke My Heart

2009-11-28T13:52:00.000-08:00

It is a normal part of life to experience both joy and sorrow. Everyone in the entire world experiences both at times. This is likely of little consolation to you if you are currently feeling the heartbreak of an ended relationship, however. It is quite difficult to make the transition from dreaming of spending your life with someone forever to knowing that your dream was not meant to be. If she broke your heart, you may be feeling as if your life is falling apart.

Feeling broken-hearted can seem rather confusing to some--there is a lot of pain and hurt feelings, of course, but there is also a sense of grief and loss that is not unlike that which is experienced when a death occurs. This happens because when your heart is broken, you feel as if you have lost a large part of your life as well as a part of yourself; therefore, it is only natural to grieve for the loss.

The depth of your feelings from your heartbreak will depend upon the depth of your relationship and the strength of the feelings you had for your girlfriend at the time of the break-up. For the first few weeks after the break-up, you may feel as if your heart has fallen out and will never return. You may also feel as if the heartbreak will never end. All of this is perfectly natural, both for men and for women who experience heartbreak.

It may take several weeks or a few months for you to begin to feel a bit more normal--and even then, you may relapse into the depths of despair once again. It may be difficult for those around you to truly understand how you are feeling and how deeply you are hurting because every broken heart is different. When a woman breaks your heart, it may leave deep scars on your heart that remain there forever.

You may feel physical and psychological symptoms of your broken heart throughout your recovery period. It is not unusual to experience some of the following symptoms:

• Stomach aches or loss of appetite
• Difficulty sleeping
• Loss of self-respect or self-esteem
• Nausea
• Extreme fatigue
• Tightness of the chest, similar to an anxiety attack
• Feelings of hopelessness

Most of these symptoms tend to be mild and of short duration; however, anyone experiencing long-term or more severe suffering should certainly visit a doctor.

Even though she broke your heart, you will recover and you will even learn to love again. It may not seem possible now because you are grieving your loss and need to come to terms with how your life will be without your ex; however, trust that as time marches on, you will heal. Just as your body heals from physical injuries, your mind and soul will heal from psychological suffering. As each day passes by, your hurt will ease, little by little. Soon your heartbreak will be a memory of the past.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

7 Effective Tips To Help Save Marriage

2009-11-27T13:02:00.000-08:00

Statistically speaking, nearly sixty percent of marriages fail. Many couples are looking into ways to avoid becoming that statistic. Although some marriages cannot be fixed, many can. It takes dedication and determination on the part of both the husband and the wife to help save their marriage, regardless of what the underlying problems are or who is at fault.

The following are some effective tips to help save marriage. However, for these to work, both the husband and wife must be committed to following these guidelines and work together to solve their differences.

1. Communicate. This is absolutely essential for making a marriage work and last. You both must clearly state how you feel, your opinions, your wants and needs to each other. By discovering what each of you feel is wrong in your marriage, you can work towards a solution.

2. Keep calm. When you are having problems in your marriage it is easy to get upset. Try to approach your problems with a level head and voice. Being hurtful or disrespectful to your spouse will not help the situation.

3. Compromise. It takes two in a marriage, so both of your views must be respected. If you give a little, you may get a lot and be happier.

4. Set goals. Goals give you direction. Make sure to set goals in your marriage that reflect both of your views and determine what you both need to do to get there.

5. Be patient. It takes time to work on problems in a marriage. Make sure that you are patient with your spouse as well as with yourself as you work towards fixing problems. Rushing to fix things can have an adverse effect.

6. Forgive and forget. Depending on your situation, this can be difficult, especially if your partner was unfaithful. If you want to save your marriage in spite of their infidelity, you will have to try and forgive them so that you can work together to preserve your marriage. Forgetting about what they have done may not be easy either. If you want to move on, it is essential that you are not dwelling on the past. Focus on the here and now and what you can both can do today to make your marriage better.

7. Get counseling. If you cannot work out your differences, counseling can help. A good counselor can help you with guidance, support, encouragement and give you unbiased views that can give you insight on how to correct the problems in your marriage. They can help you find the right solutions and methods based on what is best for you as a couple for the problems that are being faced.

It is very important that you both agree to counseling and intend to take an active role in your sessions for counseling to be an effective tool for help in your marriage. When choosing a counselor, make sure that they are licensed professionals and that you feel comfortable working with them.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

Before You And Your Boyfriend Get Back Together

2009-11-26T12:36:00.000-08:00

Are you considering getting back together with your ex boyfriend? The idea probably seems quite exciting, especially if both of you are remembering all of the good times that you had together. But you should definitely do some serious thinking before you and your boyfriend decide to get back together.

Many couples do successfully reunite and end up with very strong relationships after a break-up. However, some couples end up getting back together for the wrong reasons or without fully dealing with the factors that led to the dissolution of the relationship. If you want your rejuvenated relationship to be a success, make sure that you first take the time to consider the following issues:

• Old wounds need to be healed.

In other words, there was some reason why you and your boyfriend broke up in the first place; has this issue been resolved? If not, it is likely that your relationship may fail again. You and your boyfriend must find a way to either deal with the problems that led to the break-up or you must jointly decide that the break-up issues are no longer conflicts. It isn’t enough to simply have regrets about the relationship and how it ended; things must change.

• Let go of old expectations.

If you and your boyfriend decide to give the relationship another try, you will need to learn to treat it as a new relationship--not as an extension of your old one. This doesn’t mean that you need to completely start fresh; however, you do need to rebuild trust and friendship. You will need to reassess your goals as a couple and work on creating a new life together.

• Don’t let emotions make decisions about reuniting or about the new relationship.

Of course it can feel quite thrilling to talk again with your ex, and you both may be feeling the euphoria of falling for each other once again. Yet allowing those feelings to control whether you and your boyfriend get back together could be a mistake. You both need to think rationally about how a new relationship would be--without letting the floods of emotion overcome you. Similarly, when making decisions about the new relationship, it is best to do so calmly and with sensible and reasonable thought. If either of you allow emotions to cloud your judgment, you may come to regret it later on.

If you really want to get back together with your boyfriend, make sure that you and he are both really ready for another try at the relationship. By doing so, you could end up saving yourself a great deal of heartache if, for some reason, the relationship does not fare well again.

It may seem quite easy to believe that your boyfriend has changed because of your great desire to reignite the relationship; however, if it isn’t actually true you will just be setting yourself up for failure. Instead, set yourself up for success by being honest with your boyfriend and making sure that the two of you do not follow the same path that led to your first break-up.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

Effective Tips On How To Save My Marriage

2009-11-24T14:19:00.000-08:00

If your relationship between the two of you to the point of questioning how long you will be together, you may be asking how to save my marriage. Remember that a marriage is a union of two people, so finding solutions to your marriage problems together is essential. These problems cannot be solved by just one of you.

Here are some tips that can help bring you together and increase the chances of your marriage lasting:

- No marriage is perfect. Unlike fairy tales, typical marriages have their flaws just like each of us do. Do not expect perfection from each other. Accept that there will be lumps and bumps along the way.

- Marriage requires work. For your relationship to work, both of you need to realize that it takes work to make a marriage strong. The more work that you put into your marriage can result in an honest and happy relationship. If you do not take this seriously, it can be detrimental. The areas that typically need the most work involve trust and respect in one another . Without these things, your relationship will fall apart.

- Communicate and listen effectively. Create an environment where you can talk to each other without getting upset. Speak calmly and clearly about how you feel and allow your partner to do the same. Make sure to listen to what they have to say, regardless of what they say. Discuss how each of you feel and find common ground where both of you feel that you can find solutions for issues you are facing. The more open and honest you are with each other, the better.

- Do not dwell on past problems. Do not let past mistakes or misunderstandings determine the future of your marriage. While your past problems may be quite serious, dwelling on them will not help your marriage. Focus on the here and now and take each day as it comes.

- Be more giving to one another. Be considerate of each others needs and feelings. You can do caring gestures to simply show that you are thinking of them. If you are unsure as to what you should do for your spouse, ask them what you can do to make them happy. Doing something that will make them feel loved and special can go a long way towards strengthening your relationship. Sometimes doing the simplest things can mean the most to them.

If you have tried all of the above and still are asking how to save my marriage, a professional marriage counselor may be your best option. The decision to go to a counselor must be made by both of you as it will not work if you both do not participate fully.

If you are both truly committed to making changes to save your marriage, a counselor can offer unbiased advice to help you. By getting advice from counselor, it may help you see your problems in a different light and help you find solutions.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

Saving A Relationship 3 Tips For Doing So

2009-11-23T13:28:00.000-08:00

Whether you've recently broken up, or you're afraid you're on the brink of a breakup you can take heart, saving a relationship is possible. You can reignite the flame that the two of you once shared. It won't necessarily be easy or fast, but if you're committed to making it work there is hope.

I've compiled a list of some of the things you need to do to salvage and repair your relationship. Keep these tips in mind when you are analyzing your relationship:

1. Do you really want to stay in the relationship? I know this may sound like a dumb question but sometimes when we think we want to keep our relationship what we really mean is that we're afraid of having to find someone new, or starting over. If you're brutally honest with yourself you can determine if you really want to continue the relationship or if you're just scared of being on your own.

Another part of this question is to determine if your partner really wants to work on the relationship too. Even if you decide that your relationship is worth saving, that doesn't mean your partner shares your conviction or will be willing to invest the time and effort to work on your problems.

2. Honestly evaluate what went wrong in your relationship. Again, this will need to be done by both of you. This can be the hardest part, it's always easier to blame someone else for the problems but it's tougher to own up to your part in the break down of your relationship.

Before you can repair it you need to know not only what is broken but why it broke. The two of you may even want to visit a couples counselor to help you objectively work through this phase. Sometimes having an objective third party in the room can help you both stay calm and face things you may not have been willing or able to face on your own.

3. Try to remember what drew you to each other in the first place. If you've been in a relationship for a while you obviously loved and enjoyed each other. So often in a relationship what happens is that the 'stronger' one (or the most selfish one) controls the relationship. They become the one who tends to take more than they give. The other partner will take on the role of the giver. Over time the 'taker' will get bored because the fun loving person they fell in love with has become a doormat and the 'giver' will get sick of not getting their needs met often enough.

If your relationship has fallen into this trap you both need to take a step back and remember what attracted you to each other. This might be a good time to not only remember but to tell the other person. Remind them why you fell in love with them, and vice a versa.

Saving a relationship will take time, work, and commitment by both parties, but it can be done. If you think your relationship is worth saving and your partner thinks so too, than by all means, follow the tips above and you can salvage your relationship.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

Advice On Sex To Repair Your Relationship

2009-11-22T13:35:00.001-08:00

Being in a bad relationship is a tough thing to do. Nothing is worse than being married and lonely at the same time. If you think the best way to save your relationship is to 'spice up your sex life' you may want to think again. Here is some advice on sex to repair your relationship.

First of all don't buy into the old cliche that if you have great sex your partner will be satisfied and not leave. Unless your partner is an adolescent, or just acts like one, sex alone won't be enough to keep your relationship strong. A good adult relationship is made up of many components and until you can get it clicking on at least several levels, not just sexual, you will struggle and most likely won't be happy in the relationship.

A word of caution though, no one is perfect and no relationship is perfect. You will have times when you and your partner are not on the same page, and that's ok. It's more about balance, in your relationship as a whole you should be on the same page more often than not. If it's balanced the other way, where you are at odds more often than you are in sync you should seriously consider ending the relationship because the two of you just aren't a good fit, and that's unlikely to change.

So before you decide that hotter sex is the key to making your relationship what you really want it to be, consider some of these points:

1. How was your relationship in the beginning? Did you have a lot of hobbies that you shared together? What did you do, besides sex, when you spent time together? If you don't do those things together anymore, why not? If you analyze these changes in your relationship you will be a lot closer to figuring out what you need to work on to make your relationship strong again.

2. Have you asked your partner what they think is going on with your relationship? After all you're both part of the situation, and the problem. Why not share with each other what you are feeling, instead of complaining to your girlfriends, or buddies, why not ask your partner? No one will know what they are thinking better than they do.

Make sure that when you ask your partner what they're thinking you give them the opportunity to tell you how they feel in a 'safe' environment. What I mean by that is don't get mad and yell at them if they say something you don't want to hear. If you do then you are sending them a signal that they can't open up to you or it will get ugly, so they won't turn to you. That is the beginning of the end for many relationships.

Once they've told you how they feel, it's your turn. And the same rules apply. You have the right to express your feelings without being persecuted by your partner.

If you and your partner have reached a rough patch in your relationship it can be tempting to think that if you can reignite a fire in bed you'll be able to save your relationship, unfortunately that's simply not the case. Use the advice on sex to repair your relationship tips I've given you above to start to rebuild your relationship in a healthy way.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

Healing Relationship Wounds

2009-11-21T15:03:00.000-08:00

If you are facing the difficult task of healing relationship wounds you will need to be wiling to really invest some time and effort. You can fix your relationship but it won't necessarily be quick and easy, and you won't be able to do it all on your own.

There are many steps you will need to take to repair your broken relationship. A lot of what you will have to do will depend on what broke the relationship in the first place. It's usually not just one or two things and it usually takes a long time and a buildup of many smaller issues that eventually tear down your relationship.

Finding the cause of the break down is the first thing you will need to do in order to come up with a 'game plan' to fix it. You wouldn't expect your mechanic to fix your car without first knowing what was wrong with it, would you? The same principle applies to your relationship.

Not only will you need to figure out what went wrong you will need to honestly figure out what part you played in it. That can be very hard for most people. No one wants to admit they've been wrong or made mistakes. But you can't fix it until you know what is broken, so you will have to honestly, maybe brutally honestly, evaluate the way you've behaved in the relationship and what things you've done, or said, that might have contributed to the break down.

And yes, what you have said can play just a big a role in a broken relationship as what you've done. Never forget that words can wound and those wounds are often the hardest ones to heal.

Once you've figured out the mistakes you've made you will need to determine if you're wiling to invest the time needed to fix them. If you can't make a 100% commitment to changing your behavior than you might as well end the relationship right now. There's no point in dragging you and your partner through further pain.

Another thing you will need to honestly consider is whether or not your partner will be willing to work on the relationship too. No matter how sincere you are and motivated to make changes, it will take both of you working together to get things back to a good place. You can't do it all alone, and neither can your partner. If you aren't both committed to making it work, it's also time to move on.

Something else you will need to consider is that if you save your relationship it will never totally be 'back the way it used to be'. That doesn't mean it can't still be good, it can. It just means that whatever the two of you have gone through has left some scars, those will always be there.

Keep these things in mind when you are healing relationship wounds. If your relationship is truly worth saving, and your partner is willing to meet you half way and work on it, you can fix the relationship and even make it better than it was before, it'll just take some time...and lot's of love.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.

Openness To Healing Relationships

2009-11-20T12:29:00.000-08:00

So many times people will find themselves in a relationship that used to be good, loving, and strong. But somehow, somewhere, things changed. Now they want to get that loving relationship back. The first thing is making sure there is an openness to healing relationships.

Most relationships that have broken down have done so over a period of time and usually because of hurts, many of which have been small. These hurts have accumulated over a period of time, though, and now they've taken on a life of their own. Over time we tend to shut ourselves off from our partner because we don't want to be hurt anymore. Once that happens you will need to make sure you can open up again and attempt to heal the relationship. Before you decide that you are going to fix your broken relationship you have to make sure that you are willing to open yourself up to the possibility of more hurt.

And, it's not just about you either. Is your partner willing to open up and work on the relationship? Many times one partner is more interested in salvaging the relationship than another. If that's the case and your partner has made it clear, either by what they've said or their overall attitude, that they have no interest in working very hard to save the relationship, you might as well call it quits. You can't do it all yourself and you can't force your partner to try.

If, on the other hand, you both agree that you will try to work on the relationship the first thing you'll both need to do is look at yourselves. You need to look at yourself and your partner needs to look at themselves. You are trying to honestly figure out what part you've played in the breakdown of the relationship and whether or not you will be committed to making the changes necessary to fix it. Again, both of you have to admit their part in the break down of the relationship as well as be willing to try to change their behavior.

After all that the next thing you will both need to do is talk to each other. This doesn't mean yelling, intimidating, or getting mad. It means and open, adult discussion about how you are feeling. You each have to be able to honestly speak your mind and explain what you think has happened, how you think it can be fixed, what you are willing to do to help fix it, and how you are feeling overall.

This step is vitally important and potentially very dangerous. This is the part where someone could get hurt feelings and that could lead to a big blowout. In order for this to work, it's crucial that you both give the other person time to talk, and not get mad or defensive about what they have to say.

If you are sure you and your partner really have an openness to healing relationships, and you're wiling to work on the steps I've listed here than the two of you will have a real shot at getting back to a place in your relationship where you can be happy to be together, and happy to be 'back to normal'.

There is an excellent ebook which has helped thousands of couples get back together. Click here to read my review of The Magic of Making Up.