HR Possibilities

Creativity and Empowerment

noreply@blogger.com (Amy Frazier) — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 17:34:00 +0000

Both our sense of empowerment and our sense of our creativity arise from a connection with the self -- and both have a forward-facing aspect as well, as we experience the many ways in which the world responds to us, our initiatives and our creative ideas.

When we engage our creativity, we connect to something important inside of ourselves. As we cultivate that connection, we increase our sense of personal power.

And in parallel, our sense of empowerment can help us tough it out in our creative endeavors, especially when we need to go against the grain in the realization of our visions.

We have a very personal relationship with both creativity and empowerment -- which is not to say that we do both of them well, all the time. But they certainly cut to the heart of who we are. There's also a sense of initiative, or agency, embedded in both: in acting on them, we change our environment.

Perhaps the height of empowerment is what Abraham Maslow famously called "self-actualization," the human drive to develop ourselves into our full selves, and live life from that perspective, as much as possible. Maslow saw a connection between creativity and empowerment. During a time when creativity was often studied in the lives of great artists and scientists, Maslow became interested in what he called "self-actualizing creativity," which he considered to be "synonymous with...essential humanness." According to this view, whether making a poem or a soup, a creative life becomes an empowered one.

references: Maslow, A. H. (1968) Towards a Psychology of Being.

photo credit: Lincolian (Brian)

Amy Frazier, MSc.is an organizational and leadership development consultant based out of Seattle, Washington. Her work is targeted toward improving organizational health and human effectiveness though a multi-disciplinary approach to successful creative thinking.
more at: Stages of Presence.com.

What's new?

noreply@blogger.com (Amy Frazier) — Wed, 28 Sep 2011 01:37:00 +0000

How do you define creativity?

While there are many definitions -- and while we can all decide on the one that resonates the most for us -- one of the most accepted definitions in the field of creativity studies, is that something is creative when it demonstrates novelty and usefulness.

There's something new about it which catches our attention, and entertains our imagination, and which serves us in some important way.

Leaving the "usefulness" portion aside for a moment, how might we get to the new stuff? In what ways might we generate novel ideas in our own creative thinking?

Generating ideas is referred to as divergent thinking. Our brains do it naturally, but that doesn't mean we always do it well. Effective divergent thinking requires that we keep open to possibilities, and not judge them too quickly.

There's lots of good information about the important role of divergent thinking in creativity, and how to be effective at it. If you have the desire to know more, I hope to see you on Saturday at the session on Enhancing Incubation!

Wouldn't it be great if...

noreply@blogger.com (Amy Frazier) — Thu, 22 Sep 2011 19:09:00 +0000

Wishful thinking.

We all do it. Or, we should. Wishful thinking helps us get in touch with what's inside. It helps us keep open to possibilities.

Keeping open, and being able to visualize what's inside are creative skills. People who naturally use these kinds of creative skills are in touch with their personal, authentic creativity on a deep level, and it transforms their lives.

Incubation -- well-recognized as a sort of mysterious, dark, space where answers or insights are formed -- is an important part of the creative process. Some people believe it's possible to enhance incubation and make it more effective.

So: wouldn't it be great if...we could improve our own incubation?

This is where we'll begin in the Creativity: Enhancing Incubation breakout session. Wouldn't it be great if you were there!

Green Light Style

noreply@blogger.com (Marilyn) — Mon, 12 Sep 2011 23:25:00 +0000

Green Light action and language are the protocol for success in business and beyond.

The Green Light Goal: Create the greatest good, in the best way, for the most people, for the longest time. With that goal in mind, here are two examples:

Your Green Light style shows when you choose actions that unify rather than separate. Your Green Light style shows when you set a goal for excellence rather than perfection.

Childhood Dreams

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 22:46:00 +0000

As temperatures reach 95 in the normally temperate Pacific Northwest, I find myself visiting my husband's parent's farm and reminiscing about my childhood summer daydreams.

One of my dreams from a very young age was to be a farmer. My mother grew up on a farm and hated it. I think she sometimes wondered how I could be her child. There were times when I was obsessed with the idea of getting up early to feed the animals, milk the cows, gather eggs, and harvest whatever crops were ready. I could see myself in the shoes of both the city mouse AND the country mouse. I'm sure I was romanticizing the whole idea at the time, and somehow it still really appeals to me.

About the time junior high rolled around, those dreams were replaced by an obsession with the opposite sex. And then there were the many, many extracurricular activities of high school, working my way through college, starting a family, and climbing the career ladder. Childhood dreams were easily replaced with big-girl dreams like getting married, raising a family, and having a career.

As I approach middle age, I think back to those childhood dreams. Which have I given up on? Which have I accomplished? And, most important, which never seemed possible, but are now within reach? Some seem to have happened upon me almost by magic. One of those is the possibility of living on a farm.

For now, I'm thrilled to have a business career I love so much. Thanks in large part to my in-laws, I'm also thrilled to know that living off the land is a dream that's possible. And I'm very grateful that they give me the opportunity to help out at their farm, learn something about living a sustainable lifestyle, and have the experience of being a farmer, even if only for a few days at a time. In the meantime, I'm also enjoying living next door to a farm, where I get to enjoy a view of our neighboring cows.

What would be possible for you if you rekindled some of your childhood dreams?

Leadership Coaching with Horses

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Mon, 29 Aug 2011 00:48:00 +0000

Like most little girls, I loved horses. There was something magical about the way they looked at me, like they could see into my soul. I probably sat on a horse for the first time when I was younger than I can remember. At the age of maybe 6 or 7, I felt powerful and confident sitting up so high and being able to influence such a large, powerful animal at such a young age. My uncle used to take me riding. He'd sit me in front of him on the horse. I don't know if my memory of galloping bareback with the wind in my hair is real or a dream. It's all the same.

My grandfather's farm hand used to let me "help" him with the horses. One day he was breeding them, and one got out of hand and started running for the barn door. He yelled for me to hold it closed from the outside. The horse barreled through, knocking me to the ground. I vividly remember a hoof landing hard mere inches from my head. I knew I'd been lucky when I saw the look of panic on the farm hand's face. He did me a great service by having me stick around and continue working with the horses rather than going in. That was probably my first lesson in facing my fears. He later died in a motorcycle accident and became the first person I knew who died. I no longer recall his name or what he looked like but I will always remember the way he made me feel capable and respected at such a young age.

When my grandparents moved away from their farm, that was nearly the end of my time spent with horses except for a couple of trail rides in college. So when my friend Peggy invited me out to her farm to see her Tennessee Walking horses, I wasn't sure what to expect. The magic returned just as if it had never left. Peggy and Willow coached me to a whole new level of courage and confidence.

That's why I'm so excited to bring you the opportunity to join me, 13 other adventurous HR, leadership, and development professionals, an extraordinary executive coach, and a herd of Tennessee Walking horses for a day of profound possibility at Silk Purse Farms in Enumclaw, Washington on Friday, September 30. Tickets are on sale at http://www.hrpossibilities.eventbrite.com/.

Here's what Peggy has to say about what you can expect:

As HR professionals you are constantly hearing how others are perceived in your organizations. And from years of listening, you know that those perceptions are wildly colored by the perceiver.

Ever long for a vehicle that would offer people an unbiased view of themselves that they could hear and understand immediately………without resistance?

As HR Professionals you are also charged with finding the means to help people change their ‘less than optimal’ behaviors. Coaching is widely seen as the most effective because of its laser beam focus on the specific individual and tailored interventions in his or her behalf. And it’s time intensive and expensive.

Ever long for a vehicle that would allow people to shift their behaviors in one session, with the ability to immediately apply it in their daily lives?

Executives from Boeing, Microsoft, Swedish Medical Center, United Launch Alliance, and numerous small businesses, schools, and not for profits have done just that.

Come spend a relaxed day at Silk Purse Farm with Peggy Gilmer and her herd of equine coaches. Experience for yourself:

Tools for expanding your ability to accurately perceive a situation and act with discernment.
The horses unerring ability to accurately read and respond to your leadership.
How to shift your behavior in a moment and the difference it makes in your followers.
An opportunity with unprecedented ROI in the world of executive coaching.

Communication Rules

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Tue, 16 Aug 2011 13:55:00 +0000

I recently discovered that I had a crap load of rules for my communication with others. I had so many rules about my communication, that I couldn't speak without breaking one, and if I was trying not to break one, I simply didn't know what to say. Here's a sampling:

Don't:
Gossip
Interrupt
Talk too much
Brag
Be phony
Be annoying
Make anyone feel bad or hurt their feelings
Sound stupid
Make anyone else look bad
Make myself look bad
Be passive-aggressive
Be bossy
Complain
Whine
Withhold
Feel sorry for myself
Talk when there's no one listening
Cuss
Say things that don't matter
Be defensive
Make excuses
Be arrogant
Be insecure
Be anxious

And the list goes on. These rules came from years and years of learning about communication, from the first time my parents told me never to lie at the age of 4 to the last bit of feedback I got on my performance review.

I had a very profound breakthrough in courage and self expression lately that exploded all of my rules. That doesn't mean I'm going to start communicating in all of the ways listed. That means I'm now more aware of the conversations in my head that limit me, and I can choose to communicate out of a commitment to share myself and make a difference rather than a commitment to looking good and being perfect.

In what ways do you withhold yourself from others and limit your self expression? Do you put yourself in a box and hide who you really are and how you really feel because that's the way you've been taught?

July 4th Reflections: Is Anything Really Possible?

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Mon, 04 Jul 2011 23:44:00 +0000

July 4, 2010, Lake Meridian, Covington, WA

I've been chewing on the notion that anything is possible lately. When I'm allowing cynicism, resignation, and my ego to run the show, it's easy to think, "Clearly anything is not possible." What a ridiculous idea! Obviously, it's not possible for me to look just like the instructor at our hot yoga studio. I can't imagine looking like her even if I got fit, had lots of plastic surgery, liposuction, a face lift, spent hours in a tanning bed, and got my belly button pierced. Getting fit is a great idea. The rest are crazy, selfish, narcissistic thoughts that make no difference other than to dis-empower me.

What about "anything is possible" in a way that makes a real difference, though? On this 4th of July, I think about historic events that truly seemed impossible and happened anyway because of the intentions, beliefs, courage, commitment, and actions of those who refused to entertain the thought, "It's impossible."

I watched the movie Invictus last night. If you haven't seen it, and you want to be inspired to believe that anything is possible, watch this movie. It was completely unpredictable that a black man who spent 27 years in prison could become the President of South Africa and unite a very divided country through his pure commitment, courage, and actions.

Independence Day in the United States is a testament to the courage and commitment of a small group of people who wanted independence from the British and gained it against all odds. Whatever you may think about it, it's a good time of year to celebrate liberty and possibility in whatever form it takes for you.

Invictus
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishment the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

Beauty in the Breakdown

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Mon, 04 Jul 2011 16:58:00 +0000

Pedee, Oregon - Photo by Karina Miller

Walking in the winter woods, wetlands, and meadows of the Pacific Northwest quickly brings to mind for me the line "there's beauty in the breakdown" from the achingly gorgeous Imogen Heap/Frou Frou song, "Let Go." The wet, decaying logs, leaves, and mud are messy and dirty and rotten. And they smell incredibly sweet. From them grow the life that surrounds me so completely that I'm entranced, in love with the mossy trees and wild plants that nourish and give shelter, engrossed with the lively singing of the frogs and birds, the wriggling of mice, worms, snakes, and gophers in the ground below, and the awareness of the elk, cougar, and coyotes that have been both seen and heard at times past. I'm so completely sucked into the dual beauty of decay and life. I begin to understand that decay is a natural process--one that happens whether I fight it or not. Can I gracefully let my own decay simply fall to the ground and nourish what is to come? I realize as I walk through the forest that I do not need to cling sentimentally to the past, cut it off, push it aside, hide it, bury it, lose it completely, or mold it forcefully into something new. I can simply let it fall away and recirculate into a stronger more vibrant me.

Is there anything that isn't serving you, that by stopping the fight and letting it fall away, would create more beauty, color, or vibrancy in your life?

Note: This was originally posted in June 2011 and mysteriously disappeared from the blog.

Job Burnout

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Sat, 07 May 2011 17:39:00 +0000

I just looked up burnout on Wikipedia and found out that the first three phases of burnout are:

A compulsion to prove oneself
Working harder
Neglecting one's own needs

How often do you fall into these three phases? Do you recognize when it's happening and stop to take care of yourself? Buried in emails, behind on deadlines, and feeling the crushing burden of too much to do, how do you respond?

It's Mother's Day weekend. I'm a mom. As compelled as I am to clean out email, make sure I'm not missing anything critical, finish writing past-due performance reviews, and clean the house, these three phases are looking all-too familiar.

I've decided just now that I'm going to relax this weekend, enjoy my messy house, my husband, my three teenagers, my parents, and my cat, who really knows how to relax. I might even read a bit, take a walk, knit, and watch a movie, but only if I feel like it. Work can wait. Life can't.

Claire - Photo by Karina Miller

What about you? Let me know what you're doing this Mother's Day weekend. Make a declaration to the world. Then be cat-like and go take care of yourself.

And if you want to really Rejuvenate, Renew, and Refresh, save September 30 and October 1 to attend the next HR Possibilities Event.

Rapport and Respect

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Mon, 21 Mar 2011 00:42:00 +0000

I had the privilege of being coached today by a beautiful horse named Willow and my friend Peggy Gilmer at Silk Purse Farm in Enumclaw, Washington. Willow and Peggy taught me, in a profound way, about the impact on others of being fully grounded and present, holding my intention, and using minimum essential influence while not backing down. Here's a recent email from Peggy that she said I could use as a guest blog post.

Rapport and Respect . . . In the Office and the Barn
Peggy Gilmer

I received a vital piece of leadership wisdom watching my trainer work with a friend of mine and one of my horses. Whoopi is a very smart, very sensitive horse. She needs a consistent leader who will honor her insecurity and still hold her to high standards. Like many high potential people she requires skillful leadership or else she checks out or spins out.

My friend Molly has won her heart and built a strong sense of rapport with Whoopi with her patient and supportive style of leadership. She rewards every effort and has endless patience for Whoopi’s learning curve. Because of Molly’s sensitivity to Whoopi’s insecurity she has built a powerful sense of rapport with the mare. But when Whoopi decides she’s had enough or that Molly ‘can’t make me’ she will take off bucking. In other words, while Whoopi loves Molly, she doesn’t respect her!

When this situation develops it’s time to engage minimum essential influence. Molly will need to persist in her requests (even through the bucking), upping her energy level, changing her tactics, and never giving up her intention that Whoopi fulfill her request. This doesn’t necessarily mean greater force; sometimes just being more intriguing or creative will do the trick. And, often, with people and horses, it will get worse before it gets better. Right now Whoopi knows she can get away whenever she wants to because she always has. So, when Molly begins to hold her to the task and insist on performance she will probably buck and run even more....UNTIL she realizes Molly is resolute and will persist until the task is accomplished.

Rapport and respect....you need both for true high performance....from horses and people!

On Certainty and Vulnerability

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Wed, 23 Feb 2011 05:18:00 +0000

Photo by Karina Miller

One of my teachers asked me this question: "What are you absolutely certain of?" The question really stumped me. My logical brain could not come up with a single answer.

Having spent my life in the company of very intellectually-skilled and challenging debaters, I felt trapped. Was it a trick question? The only thing I could think of to say was, "Nothing, but not in a bad way."

"No," she demanded, "what are you certain of?" "Really, nothing," I said, "I can't think of anything." And then, with some sadness she said, "Ok, that might be true for you." I could sense that my intellect was holding me back from something potentially rich and deep—some essential life force.

Around the table we went. When we got back to me, I had an answer, provided by others. I was certain of love, and most specifically, my love for my children. I'm so certain of it that debate would be utterly ridiculous.

As I reflected on this moment of certainty in the following weeks, and grew in my confidence around my certainty about love, I understood that my prior uncertainty about anything was what was holding me back. It's what held me back from expressing myself and sharing myself with others, from having an opinion, trusting anyone and being truly connected in a vulnerable way, from creativity, and especially from writing.

What I thought I was hiding is so obvious now that I feel stupid saying it, because something I'm at least fairly certain of, is that I wasn't fooling anyone but myself. I was hiding an immense fear of being wrong, misunderstood, disliked, and especially of making anyone angry or uncomfortable. It seemed safer and wiser to hold back.

For all of those who have pulled their hair out desperately wanting me to just say what I thought about something, to be straight and vulnerable, to take risks and quit being such a pansy, to express some passion, I apologize. I get it now. The cost was high at times. I didn't always do my job. You suffered. You saw me suffering.

Having at least one solid thing to be certain of gives me a place to start from in the act of creating. I see a whole new world of possibility opening up before me as I create being connected, authentic, and vulnerable.

What gives you the courage to be vulnerable? What do you see is possible to create in your life by being vulnerable?

Here are a few of my inspirations:

One of the bravest, most vulnerable writers in the world, and one of my absolute favorite bloggers: Penelope Trunk
A fabulous Tedx Talk on connection and vulnerability by Brené Brow.
My dear friend Kelley Picasso, who challenges me to trust, love, and be vulnerable, and who demonstrates her own vulnerability on a regular basis. She also just started a beautiful new blog called A Cool Blue Pearl.
One of my best teachers and guides, Sarah Maclean Bicknell of Creative Ground who asked me the question that prompted this blog post.

Why I Started Writing A Blog Called HR Possibilities

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Fri, 03 Dec 2010 17:50:00 +0000

Ladybug on the beach(?!) - Photo by Karina Miller

I have an amazing life, I loathe complaining, and in order to explain why I started writing a blog called HR Possibilities, I have to admit it: 2009 was a spectacularly crappy year (although not my personal worst by any stretch). I won't bore you with the gory details, but to give you some idea, the themes that were present for me were layoffs, pay cuts, suicides, a constant stream of bad news about the wars and the economy, loads of un-fun work, post-traumatic stress, what my nutritionist calls adrenal fatigue, and a visit to the ER due to what I was certain would kill me, but was probably "just" the swine flu. And although I knew my set of "problems" was imminently better than most, that I had awesome family and friends, better health than many, a nice home that wasn't in foreclosure, a great boss, and what had been, for the most part, a dream job, I was feeling like a miserable failure.

As I sat in a personal development seminar early this year listening to a participant stand in front of the group of over a hundred people and talk about how he didn't ever speak in front of groups, and the leader said, "What are you doing right now?" I had to laugh. That was my breakthrough. It was that simple. Just like the dude standing in front of a huge group of people saying that he doesn't do that, I was telling myself that I didn't contribute—all the while contributing on a daily basis and being acknowledged for my contribution by friends, family, colleagues, company leaders, and peers. It was a slap in the face to those around me not to recognize myself as they saw me, but as the little voice in my head had convinced me I was.

In another course, the leader told us that we treat people like either tools or toys. Calling human beings by the term "resources" suddenly struck me as demeaning and extremely limiting. As I watched those around me have life-changing breakthroughs in areas of their lives that seemed completely insurmountable, I understood that humans are not merely resources to be used and abused for profit and fun, we are all walking possibilities.

I hesitate to suggest this because it sounds a little stupid even to me—perhaps our profession should be called Human Possibilities instead of Human Resources. Or maybe we could just think of it this way—we provide resources, including leading and coaching for "what's possible," to human beings for the purpose of collectively creating something good—versus providing, manipulating, improving, and maximizing humans as resources for the benefit of the impersonal, almighty business.

What could be possible in our organizations and the world if we saw ourselves, through all the muck and difficulties of life, as possibilities instead of barely-surviving, Cro-Magnan descendents who can't catch a break? Is this notion too Pollyanna? Sacrilege? Stupid? Or maybe, just maybe, revolutionary?

Gen Y and Great Ideas

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Sun, 24 Oct 2010 04:51:00 +0000

My friend Lyndi Thompson is brilliant. She put together Seattle's first Chocolate Tweetup at the country's only fair-trade, organic chocolate factory, Theo Chocolate, to benefit Pasado's Safe Haven and give her startup, social media, and socially-concious friends a fun networking opportunity. Lyndi is passionate about making a difference for humans and animals alike. Who doesn't love chocolate, wine, and helping animals?

The event was a hit with 56 people drinking wine, eating chocolate, taking factory tours, and learning about the great work of Pasado's.

I love the energy, creativity, and social conscience of Gen Y, and especially Lyndi, who is all about what's possible!

Watch for the November Chocolate Tweetup to benefit Seattle Food Banks. Follow Chocolate Tweetup on Facebook, ChocoTweetup on Twitter or check the ChocoTweetup website for information.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.3

HR Humor

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Sat, 23 Oct 2010 19:44:00 +0000

One of my favorite co-workers, Holly James, drew this for me after we had a particularly trying time of submitting the onerous Form 5500 for our 401(k) plan. The form 5500 is required by the Department of Labor for benefit plans and is intended, among other things, to protect employees from greedy (or careless) corporations might otherwise steal from their employees. Although I'm very supportive of the cause, it's one of the many tasks required of the HR profession that doesn't add value to the company, no one appreciates, isn't a learning opportunity, and isn't the least bit interesting.

I've been practicing acknowledging breakdowns and "finding the gap" in order to improve performance and create breakthroughs. Acknowledging the frustrations of the job is one small way to find a possibility -- even if that possibility is a simple bit of humor!

How We Rejuvenated, Refreshed & Renewed on a Sunny Saturday in Seattle

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 05:38:00 +0000

The Setting

About 33 people showed up yesterday at the HR Possibilities Event at the Maritime Event Center at Bell Harbor. There was an enormous cruise ship parked just outside the window of the main room, the day was gorgeous, and the space was amazing, providing the perfect setting for creativity and inspiration.

What's Going On Here?

Participants arrived not knowing exactly what to expect and quickly got into the spirit with name tags listing what they love, registration hugs for those we knew, party music, and an invitation to take off their HR hats and put on a silly hat from the costume box. I felt a little like Ellen Degeneres as I danced about the room.

A Day of Inspiration and Creativity
After comments from Kristina Pfeil and yours truly, Dr. Melody Ivory opened with a performance poem on being the masterpiece you were meant to be, which set the perfect tone for the day.

Curt Rosengren, The Passion Catalyst, helped us discover a bit about our true selves in a session called "How to Get Wild About Work!," where we had an opportunity to start thinking about what we're passionate about and why.

Once everyone was fully into the spirit of the day, the Sugarplum Elves arrived for a surprise performance of a singing telegram medley before leading everyone to their next destination--the Captain's Room, the Buoy Room, the Bridge, or the main event room.

The breakout sessions were a combination of traditional workshops and open-space concept activities and discussions:

Ann-Marie Archer of Archer and Associates and Healing Garden led a discussion on "Healing Your Heart at Work" based on the book, The Four-Fold Way: Walking the Paths of the Warrior, Teacher, Healer, and Visionary by Angeles Arrien.
Deborah Huyer, of Coaching for Results, led a workshop called "Your Definition of Success."
Windsor Lewis-Gloy led a discussion on the "Dichotomy of HR."
We had our photos taken with the elves.
We designed and decorated Dream Journals using supplies from Stampin' Up provided by Kristina Pfeil.

After the first breakout sessions, the Sugarplum Elves broke out their ukulele, gathered up the crowd, and performed another tune while we ate lunch. We also heard from our generous sponsors, TRUEBenefits, NetSpeed Learning Solutions, and learned a little bit about Wellspring Family Services and the Employee Assistance Program they offer to local businesses.

After lunch, we had another breakout opportunity, and then an interactive and kinetic presentation by Dr. Melody Ivory called "Making the Hard Changes with Ease and Grace." We wrapped up with a group discussion about what we got out of the day, fabulous door prizes, and a final performance poem with audience participation called "Hope Hangs Near."

My Key Takeaways

I was incredibly moved by our community of human resources professionals and our interest in creating lives and workplaces that work for us, our coworkers, and the companies that sustain us.
Curt took me a bit further down the path of understanding my passions.
Ann-Marie taught me the importance of developing and balancing the parts of me that are teacher, warrior, healer, and visionary, and having a heart that is open, strong, full, and clear.
Melody gave me the confidence and inspiration that I can make the hard changes with ease and grace so that I can be the masterpiece I was meant to be.

Kristina reminded me of the importance of nurturing my creative side.
Most importantly, I learned about true collaboration and the power of community. I learned that I didn't have to work hard or "do it myself," and that, in fact, something much more special came about by staying in the space of creation and inspiration.

Gratitude
I'm filled with gratitude for the following people and companies who contributed to this day.

Thanks to each person who participated in the day. Your participation meant the world to me. I heard from many of you that the day meant something to you, too. I invite you to share your comments as comments to this blog post.
Autumn Pulver, my coworker, friend, and daily inspiration: Autumn did many, many things to support this event, including designing the cool dandelion logo, finding the venue (no easy task at the convergence of the graduation, wedding, and prom seasons), listening whenever I wanted to talk, and managing the entire day.
Magdalene Adenau, who agreed to manage the event until the day of even though she was: 1. in graduate school; 2. starting a new job; and 3. unable to attend. She was responsible for the format, flow, and schedule of the day, the Sugarplum Elves, and infusing the event with her creativity and wisdom.
Kristina Pfeil, who "got it" more than anyone else, is always willing to show up as her true self and be vulnerable, and lent her vast creativity, generous spirit of abundance, music, and MC skills to the day.
Curt Rosengren, the common thread who attended every single steering committee meeting--more than anyone else, including me; shared his real-self every minute; and brought his passion for passion, wit, and multitude of ideas.
Ann-Marie Archer, my best friend, partner in knitting, healer, and the person who inspires me to be the best I can be every day.
Deborah Huyer who inspires me by her choices, integrity, commitment to leading the life of her dreams, and her great ideas.
Dr. Melody Ivory, our Performance Poet and Change Viruoso, who I feel so privileged to know and call a member of my community. Melody brought an amazing level of inspiration, passion, commitment, and creativity to the day.
Sponsor Grant McDonald of TRUEBenefits who has been a tremendous business partner and has quickly become a friend.
Sponsor Cynthia Clay of NetSpeed Learning Solutions who saved me in the final hours, and I look forward to working with in the future.
Holly James: photographer, videographer, muse, and friend.
Harry Tolen: website consultant.
Jessica Hendrawidjaja: the very talented young graphic designer who designed the event flyer.
Diane Harter: steering committee member, advisor, and friend.
Windsor Lewis-Gloy: early supporter and open space facilitator.
LuAnn Johnson, Cammy Vasquez, and Carole Anderson: early supporters.
And my mom, Mary Ann Knoche, of Operations Plus, who handled online registration and finances and has always loved me for exactly who I am, and exactly who I am not.

I love you all and am looking forward to creating more possibilities with you in the future!

Mistakes That Can't Be Fixed

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Sun, 06 Jun 2010 05:24:00 +0000

World news has me thinking a lot about mistakes that can't be fixed. I'm not talking about enormous, screw-up-the-entire world, nearly-impossible-to-forgive mistakes that HAVE to be worked on no matter how hard they are to fix. I'm talking about big mistakes that upset people, and are hard to recover from, but are not a matter of life and death, like bad calls in a baseball game.

I made one of those early in my career that I'll never forget. In the mid-80s, I was an intern at KOMO-TV, Seattle's ABC news affiliate. I happened to be in the Producer's booth watching the behind-the-scenes magic, when I saw Dr. Bill Crounse, live on air, fumbling with the papers in front of him to read his script. I saw the look of horror flash across his face when he realized his script was not in the teleprompter. I didn't quite understand what was happening until the great and powerful Producer looked at ME and said something like, "Oops!"

You see, it was my job to organize and distribute the script for the 5pm news. One copy went to the guy who ran the teleprompter, a copy went to each anchor, and an extra copy must have gone to someone who managed other live segments. From the day I was trained until that big day, Dr. Crounse's segment had always been pre-recorded, so the script didn't go into the teleprompter. I assumed that Dr. Crounse's segment never went into the teleprompter and didn't understand the markings on the script that indicated whether or not a segment was pre-recorded. It was clearly the fault of the person who trained me--or perhaps I just wasn't paying enough attention.

The mistake was magnified in my mind by the fact that Dr. Crounse had twice saved me from excruciating pain and suffering while practicing at the Virginia Mason Walk-In Clinic in downtown Seattle. I was essentially sharing a desk at KOMO with him, although we were never at the station at the same time until now, which was just weird and coincidental. (Who ends up sharing a desk with their doctor anyway?) Thankfully, in spite of being my doctor, sharing a desk with me, and meeting me once at the station, I'm pretty sure he had no idea who I was, nor that I was the cause of his embarrassment.

Lesson Learned
The Producer said something to me like, "That's the news business. Nobody died, and there's nothing that can be done now. It happens to everyone. You just have to let it go and move forward."

I never did have a chance to apologize to Dr. Crounse, nor did I think to thank the Producer for teaching me an important lesson.

Dr. Crounse, if you ever Google your name, perhaps you'll see this blog post and accept my apology for making you look bad, live, on air, in front of hundreds of thousands of people.

And to the great and powerful Producer, thank you for easing my pain and guilt at the tender age of 19 and teaching me an important lesson that will stick with me for the rest of my life. Mistakes happen. Learn from them, forgive, and move on--certain oil companies excepted.

Change and the Cupboard Door - Part 2

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 05:17:00 +0000

I am apparently wholly incapable of altering some habits -- namely the closing of open cupboard doors. It has been more difficult to give up closing a one-hinged cupboard door than giving up sugar and caffeine!

My husband's solution was to remove the cupboard door altogether. It is now on the floor, propped against the closest wall. I'm looking forward to the hinges arriving.

In the meantime, I'm contemplating the meaning of this development. Perhaps temptations need to be removed in order to break persistent habits. Perhaps big changes are easier than small changes. Or, maybe changes forced on us by others are completely different than those we choose to make for ourselves.

What little changes would make a difference in your life? Which ones are hard to make? What would it take to make them? Do any of your cupboard doors just need to be removed by someone who cares (or is simply tired of watching you close them repeatedly)?

Giving Feedback

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Mon, 31 May 2010 20:21:00 +0000

Like some people's relationship status on Facebook, feedback is complicated. Check out the various definitions and versions on Wikipedia or google the word "feedback" for proof. Most of us want simple, honest feedback that gives us an idea of how to improve. Why is that so difficult?

There are no end of experts on the topic of feeback. Here's my feedback on the topic of feedback: Let's keep it simple. Just tell me what you think. Comments, please! And, by the way, you can provide anonymous comments without logging in or creating an account--thanks to a few caring friends who provided feedback. Oh, and my Feedburner Subscribe button works now, too. Please subscribe.

If you really want to learn about giving effective, even transformative, feedback, read my favorite experts on the topic, Robert Kegan and Lisa Laskow Lahey, authors of How the Way We Talk Can Change the Way We Work. A blog post is way too short for something so complicated.

Hang In There!

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Sun, 30 May 2010 05:04:00 +0000

Three of my friends got jobs two weeks ago. All three of them had been out of work for over a year and are absolutely thrilled with their new jobs -- jobs that appear to be perfect fits -- where they can be happy and make money.

Coincidentally, the very same week, the Puget Sound Business Journal reported that Seattle has the nation's best economy.

Great news! Things are looking up! There is hope!

On the other hand, I talk to friends and candidates every day who are sounding more and more distraught, depressed, and jaded. If Seattle has the nation's best economy, I'm left wondering how bad it is everywhere else.

What to do?

If you're a hiring manager, understand what you need, move quickly, be decisive, and quit discriminating against the unemployed. Consider not only that that there are some amazing candidates out there who simply drew the short straw, but also that they may be so excited to get back to work that they could end up being your best employees. Your companies are counting on you to fill the jobs, and the world is counting on you to put people back to work.

If you're a candidate, do whatever it takes to take care of yourself so that you can be authentically positive and enthusiastic when you interview. I guarantee it will be the best way to differentiate yourself amongst the living dead of the unemployed, underemployed, jaded, and overworked. In my experience, most hiring managers and business owners want to hire people who are optimistic. They need a boost to their own morale, and, more importantly, it's good for business.

If you have a choice, and you do, please choose optimism. Our collective well being depends on it. And let me know what I can do to help.

Rejuvenate. Refresh. Renew. An HR Possibilities Event

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Thu, 27 May 2010 05:15:00 +0000

The HR Possibilities steering committee met tonight and discussed at least a dozen creative, exciting ideas for the HR Possibilities Event on Saturday, June 12. If we only pull off a few of them, which I'm confident we'll do, it will definitely be a day to remember! If you haven't done so already, sign up at http://www.hrpossibilities.org/ and be prepared to be inspired.

Did I mention that we're holding the event at the very cool and inspiring Maritime Event Center at Bell Harbor? And that there will be lots of food and beverages? And opportunities to get to know your HR colleages in meaningful ways?

I can hardly wait!!!

While you're waiting around for the big day, post a comment and let us know:

What inspires you
What you want to get out of attending Rejuvenate. Refresh. Renew.
Any ideas or questions you have about the event

I'll see you the 12th!

Speak Up or Walk Away?

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Wed, 26 May 2010 14:25:00 +0000

What inspires me today is people who speak up and tell the truth, like Laurie Ruettimann over at Punk Rock HR, my manager, several of my coworkers, and even my teenage daughter, who very seriously requested the other day that I make an attempt not to be so noisy as to wake her up before 7am on weekdays.

I struggle daily with when to speak up and when to keep my mouth shut and move on, but lately I'm becoming more and more grateful for employees, family, and friends who speak up, and I'm learning to do more of it myself. Those are the people I can count on to:

Come to me directly when they have a problem with me or something I'm doing rather than complaining, gossiping behind my back, becoming passive aggressive, or just plain being angry with me without me knowing why.
Come to me or someone else only once or twice for coaching, feedback, or advice, and then take care of their issue without coming to me multiple times to complain about the same issue and why it's someone else's fault that things aren't going well for them.
Take responsibility for their own experience and do something about it rather than being angry, disengaged, or quitting before trying to work something out.
Take care of performance issues with their co-workers and direct reports before they decide it's too late and ask me how to fire someone who has no idea what they are doing wrong.
Fix problems in the company so that we can produce better results.

Speaking up takes courage, and in turn creates the trust that allows for that courage to spread throughout an organization.

I've had schools, jobs, organizations, and people in my past that I've just walked away from without speaking up, and some who've walked away from me. Lately, I've been going back to some of them and apologizing--telling them that I promise not to play the ultimate trump card and just walk away again without saying anything and trying to work it out.

What's possible in your life if only you had the courage to speak up? What is the cost of not speaking up?

Start with a simple act of courage today. It could be returning your Starbucks latte that doesn't taste right, or telling your co-worker that their B.O. is driving you crazy. Whatever it is, take responsibility for one thing that isn't working for you today. You might find that courage gives you access to something new and exciting. Let me know how it goes.

Change and the Cupboard Door

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Sun, 23 May 2010 17:17:00 +0000

If you think you're good at handling change, try this:

Open a cupboard door that is normally closed, that you pass by on a regular basis, and try to keep it open all week without closing it.

My husband took a hinge off of the cupboard door that holds our coffee mugs so that he could take it to the hardware store to find a suitable substitute. He asked the family not to close it so that the other hinge wouldn't get bent.

I have closed that darn cupboard door at least 10 times.

What subconscious habits do you have? How often do you close doors throughout the day? What hinges get bent as a result? What possibilities do you close off?

Letting Go

noreply@blogger.com (Karina Miller) — Sat, 22 May 2010 19:15:00 +0000

A ropes course I took last year helped me begin to understand the true meaning of letting go. It was a powerful analogy for the physical sensation of letting go of something my core physiology and psychology truly thought was required for sheer survival.

I was harnessed to a very solid line, standing on a log, about 40 feet up in the trees. I had practiced sitting in my harness and knew that there was no way to fall. My conscious intellect “knew” that letting go of the ropes that connected my harness to the main line wouldn’t hurt a thing. Letting go of my death grip on those ropes would actually free up energy to help with my balance and focus, which would in turn improve my performance dramatically. Yet it was literally one of the the hardest physical, mental, and emotional things I’ve ever done. I was terrified and on the verge of breaking down into a puddle of tears.

It felt similar to many past experiences of clearly irrational fear, panic, and depression. With the help of an excellent coach, I finally, and very slowly, eased my grip and let go entirely. I also learned to request the support I needed from my coach – at the mechanical, strategic, and deep “feeling” levels of learning.

Once I actually let go and felt the sensation of letting go throughout my body, I was able to work through the course to the limit of my true physical abilities and continue the process of letting go of fear. I felt much freer and was able to move forward, establish challenging goals, and do things I never thought were possible – including effectively coaching others who were more skilled than me.

Several months after the ropes course, I saw the aftermath of harmful “letting go” when a man let go of the Aurora Bridge rail from the outside and fell hundreds of feet to his death, right next to me. Although letting go of the ropes felt similar to causing myself to plunge to certain death, the difference between letting go of my hardcore grip on habits, thoughts, emotions, fears, and hurts that limit me from living a fully engaged life, and making very poor choices that conflict with my values or go so far as to inflict harm or death on myself or anyone else were stark.

My survival mechanism doesn’t always know the difference. Sometimes it feels like letting go of something I’ve held onto tightly my entire life will literally cause my death. But, my brain and heart can tell the difference if I really listen. By deepening my understanding of my fears, opinions, stories, and hypocrisies through coaching, feedback from others, and deep personal reflection, and then letting go of them, I have started understanding the possibilities for true freedom, deep love, authenticity, and full engagement in my life.