None of it.

Sure sometimes you get lucky and have a great idea.  Sometimes you have the words, lyrics, colours, formulae, et cetera flow from your hands with no

Wall.

What the fuck?  Where did those juices go?  The oasis dried up and you’re now in the middle of a desert.  Now you have to work.  You can’t just sit around and do sweet FA.  You have to keep moving.  Keep creating.  Keep typing, writing, playing, walking, cooking, painting, drawing, jumping, running, solving.  No one survived the desert by standing still and hoping a great idea would fill their bodies with sustenance.

Walk around.  You’ll find your way out.  Or in.

Make It Awesome and Don’t fear Greatness,

ScottyHump

P.S. Now I have to do this.  Fuck.

It’s never nice to be rejected.  I’m sure there are people who love to be rejected (*cough* daddy issues *cough*), but in the grand scheme of things being rejected sucks.  Whether it’s on a work, personal or pleasure basis It’s not fun being told, “You’re not good enough.”  You do, however, need to look at the positives of rejection.  If you were dumped by somebody you really cared about, evaluate what you did wrong to end up on the shit end of the stick.  Once you have found out your wrongdoings you can then carry that into your next relationship and see if you’ve learned enough to press forward.

I was kicked out of my band that I had founded with two other guys.  We wanted to expand our sound so we took a bassist and a drummer on board.  At first it was great, but after a while I wasn’t contributing as much as I had been when we were just three guys.  After only two jam sessions with our drummer I could already feel myself slipping into a cloud of redundancy and obscurity.  Our singer could play rhythm (and wanted to) so why the fuck was I there?  I wasn’t enjoying myself when we would get together because they would be playing really basic stuff that I would want to ramp up, but could never really find the sound I wanted to introduce.  They started writing music without me and I could never into that groove we had before.

Then the call came from one of the guys I started the band with.  Steve (not his real name) told me that we were heading in different directions musically, that I was more of a solo artist and he had talked with the other guys in the band and they decided I was no longer needed.  I was out of the band.  Knee-jerk reaction?  ”WHAT THE FUCK STEVE?!?!  ARE YOU SHITTING ME?  HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN TALKING ABOUT ME BEHIND MY BACK?!”  That’s not what happened.  I’ve done that before and it blows for both sides.  Cooler heads prevail, right?  In my brain I was, at first, a little shocked, but in only a couple of seconds I realized what was happening.  1) The people who didn’t want to listen to my new stuff were no longer factors; 2) I didn’t have to worry about playing through songs that I didn’t like anymore.

I told him that I kind of saw this coming and the fact they didn’t want to elaborate on my riffs and songs was a pretty good hint towards their exeunt.  It was fun while it lasted.  We played a few shows and received some decent feedback.  Only playing a few shows obviously doesn’t get you discovered and turn you into a millionaire, but the experience was good.  It was my first band and not unlike sex, very few people get married to the person they lost their virginity too (and stay happy the whole time).  You have to be fluid.  You can’t always restrict yourself to what is comfortable.  The uncomfortable is how we grow as humans.

My silver lining is that I know have 100% control over how my songs sound.  Will that make some of them suck?  Fuck ya it will, but some of them would have sucked in a band setting anyway.  It’s the law of numbers.  Will this mean that some of my songs will sound better than if others could tamper with them?  Fuck yes.  And that’s what I’m excited about.

Find your silver lining and rejection can be the best motivator you’ve ever had.

Make It Awesome and Don’t fear Greatness,

ScottyHump

Nowadays most people look to smoking as an idiotic thing to do. He knew this. He had seen the packaging; the black lungs, the decaying teeth, the cancerous tongue. But smoking still appealed to him. He’s seen his father in the hospital as a result of smoking for almost 40 years. But smoking still appealed to him. What was he trying to accomplish? Was he seeking control of his life where he previously failed? He enjoyed the feeling of smoking. The sound of the paper burning and the glow of ember when all was quiet around him and he was alone with his thoughts.

He listened and observed to the nature around him when he wasn’t reading or listening to music during a cigar. He watched birds land on the grass gathering leaves, twigs and the sort for their nests. Chirping birds were infinite in their calls. Regardless of the time of day he could always go out for a cigar and hear the birds sing. He has recently stopped listening to music as he prefers the sound of birds cooing for one another. “More peaceful,” he thought.

“But when will I stop?” he wondered to himself. Obviously, cigars and cigarettes are addictive. No one can deny that fact. Health personalities have advocated this for decades. Yet even the warnings on boxes are traded as playing cards between youth smokers. Amassing a collection of health problems in physical form before one of them is introduced within the young body of its collector. Then they understand, but their friends, most of them at least, continue to smoke. Is it that you are deliberately harming yourself? eroding away like a boulder in the ocean? that makes smoking so inviting?

“Once I have to smoke not because I want to, but because I have to is when I’ll stop,” he told himself. Would this not be too late? The power of addiction would be at its ascending action. The introduction is over and the climax is nothing to look forward to. Once that happens you are descending into death. But once the action picks up don’t you want to go along for the ride and see what happens? Closing a half-started book can be taxing on the mind.

In the end who knows what will happen with him. He sets up deadlines to stop, but finds himself pushing for one more pack. The cost is extraordinary. The price is around $10.

Make It Awesome and Don’t fear Greatness

ScottyHump

Brand New Life

Make It Awesome and Don’t fear Greatness,

ScottyHump

So today the new update for Skyrim that we have all been waiting for to stop that wretched lag in our precious frame rates was released.  Needless to say it fixed the problem and everything moves fluidly now with very little to no lag in comparison to pre-update play.

…..

Unfortunately, I’ve experienced more aggravation in the hour I’ve played with 1.02 than the 105 hours of 1.01.  In that hour the game has frozen on me twice, once while entering a dungeon; once while stalking a Dova (I think that’s how you spell it).  My beef should be pretty obvious.  These days console games (for the most part) have become increasingly dependent on post-release updates to fix problems that should be hashed out before release.

These games are $70 or more and can hit $150 with some Legendary/Collector’s Editions (including Skyrim).  I don’t ever remember having to download an update for Ocarina of Time or Super Mario Bros.  Oh that’s right!  I didn’t fucking have to!  They were ready when the calendar flipped over on launch day morning.  I understand that games are more complex now and developers are under extreme pressure to get their games out on time, but Oblivion is 5 years old!  They’ve had a long bloody time to make this game and to have it come out with an update the day after launch with another update to fix a major glitch within 3 weeks is entirely unacceptable.  Especially because there are now new freezing problems Bethesda needs to fix.

I know Bethesda has had other games come out, but don’t tell me they don’t have different game-teams in their company.  While others were working on Fallout 3 and the like others were working on Skyrim.  End of discussion.  Having a lot of crap on your plate is commonplace now more than ever and I know it’s tough because we are a demanding bunch of nerds/assholes and we want our games to be perfect.  To a bloody fault.  You know what game recently came out only two years after it’s super awesome predecessor?  Uncharted 3: Drake’s Deception.  How many updates did it need?  1 minor update on launch day that fixed an issue that only 3D users would have noticed (so like 2%?  Maybe?).  Other than that IT WAS A FUCKING AMAZING GAME.  It can be done!  I wear Drake’s ring around my neck everyday like Frodo I love that game so much.  Naughty Dog knows how to deliver an epic game on time without any major problems.

Staying with the Uncharted Series I would like to make one point that will sound great, but does need to be put into perspective.  Naughty Dog put out 3 of the best games the PS3 has ever had between the release of Oblivion (2006) and Skyrim (2011).  Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune (2007), Uncharted 2: Among Thieves (2009) and Uncharted 3: Drake’s Deception (2011) were all chronologically 5x better than the last (that’s not even hyperbole in my opinion; 2 was 5x better than 1 and 3 was 5x better than 2).  3 games in the same time frame as 1 game from Bethesda.

Counter Point: Skyrim and Oblivion are completely different games compared to Uncharted because they have vast maps that span entire provinces with literally hundreds of dungeons and forts that take longer to create and mould into shape.  Now others would say that the movie style gameplay in Uncharted and its demand for sustaining much higher quality graphics during gameplay (specifically facial and character/set detail) would present an equal challenge compared to Skyrim’s sheer size.  I’m half of one of those people (which is why I listed it as a counter point, but let me finish).  As far as the story goes I would consider it a stalemate.  The rich story-telling in Uncharted versus the innumerable quests in the Elder Scrolls would result in victory, or defeat, for both sides.  To put it simply, one warrior learns to hit the hardest whilst the other learns to avoid being hit.  Both warriors put an equal amount of work into their art yet show different results when training is over and they must reveal their acquired talents.

The act of playing without glitches and freezing and lag (Oh my!) is arguably the lowest common denominator when it comes to playing video games.  In this polite-post-turned-ridiculous-rant Naughty Dog is putting full games on the table from the start.  Meanwhile, Bethesda is serving four or five coarse meals.

Make It Awesome and Don’t fear Greatness,

ScottyHump

I’m tired of people saying “Like you need it,” or “What are you trying to lose?” when I go into any details or even mention that I’m on a diet.  You know how diet is defined?  In two ways, as a verb and as a noun.  If you are dieting then you are trying to lose weight; if you are on a diet it is simply the “Selection of Food”.  Diet is actually a synonym for food or foodstuffs.  See?  You’re even going to learn during my lecture/rant/angry words.

Anywhodiddle, I’m back on the Slow-Carb Diet full on.  Head first and waist deep.  I made a promise to myself to eat/drink everything (with the exception of someone’s birthday gift) in my house that didn’t belong in the diet.  I had a cake left in the fridge.  Ate it.  I had a loaf of bread in the freezer.  Ate it.  I had jam in the pantry.  Ate what I could with the bread, swallowed as much jam-on-a-spoon as I could and tossed the rest.  I even wanted to order pizza, but the leftovers would have never been eaten because by next Saturday they would be pretty nasty.

I don’t know if I’ll be posting results or not, but during my binge today (and the last 2 or 3 weeks to be frank) I’ve gained about 5 pounds.  I know that’s not much, but when one’s been at one consistent weight for 2 months 5 extra pounds is weird.  I’ve continued cold showers and protein-fuelled-iced-coffee shakes in the mornings.  I think that’s what helped limit my gluttony to a meagre 5 p0und excess.

Best of luck in life and it’s games,

ScottyHump

But I’m growing to not enjoy the current Series of Doctor Who.  I loved Eccleston and Tennant.  And I love Matt Smith.  And Rose was by far my favourite companion, but Amy, Donna and Martha were great too.  What it boils down to is the writing.  Stephen Moffat is a great writer for an episode at a time in my opinion.  He writes these crazy, the-story-goes-everywhere episodes.  ”Blink” in Series 3 was phenomenal.  It was a great episode and I really enjoyed it.  For a lot of Who-vians that are on the fence that episode usually brings them around to the dark side.  He also created the Stone Angels in that episode and those are in the Top 5 aliens species in the entire Doctor Who history.  Of course Daleks and Cybermen are 1 and 2.

So why don’t I like the new stuff?  It’s me, I think.  I’m used to the Doctor going to crazy places and times that are really intriguing.  My favourite episodes are the “Impossible Planet” and “Satan’s Pit” episodes (written by Matt Jones).  The idea behind those episodes was amazing.  I also loved the end of Series 2 (probably my favourite series so far) when Rose had to leave the Doctor.  I must admit that I did cry and it’s kinda tearing me up right now… Don’t judge me!

I’m so used to the old way of the story being told.  Great independent stories like visiting New New York or the Master episodes or Daleks then coming into the end of the season you realize all the clues that have been laid out in front of you right in front of your eyes and they all start to connect.  Like in Series 1 when Bad Wolf starts popping up everywhere then they show you the montage of everything you may have missed or dismissed as rubbish.

The new series seems to be elaborate right from the start.  I don’t want to blame who I’m about to blame, but I’m going to anyway.  The entire history of Doctor Who was written for a British audience first and if you liked it after that good on you.  If you didn’t like it then you could go watch something else because Doctor Who was a British series.  Then… America started loving it.  Good for them.  It’s a great show and I would not have began to watch it if Chris Hardwick didn’t shut up about it on his podcast.

But when you have an American audience it influences your writing.  You need to constantly keep the audience’s attention and give them huge cliff hangers at the end of every episode.  It used to be one cliff hanger at the end of the episode if there was a part 2.  But that was it!!  Now if you miss one episode you’re screwed.  You could start watching the older series out of the blue.  You could almost pick an episode in the middle of the season and enjoy it throughly.  If you tried that with the most recent episode of Series 6 you would be mind fucked with all the stuff you would be confused about.

All I’m saying here is that I don’t like where Doctor Who is headed.  I know a lot of people who are and that’s great because it will get more episodes made and maybe, just maybe, in the future the writers will come back around to what I like.  At the end of the day I want everyone to be able to enjoy Doctor Who.  It’s a classic programme that deserves huge praise and recognition from everyone.

Until another day,

Make It Awesome and Don’t fear Greatness,

ScottyHump

Please excuse my bombing…  Enjoy!

I ate about a dozen oreos, half an oreo cake and about 2″ off the top of an ice cream tub. For breakfast I did have 5 strips of turkey bacon, 4 eggs and a protein shake to fill me up for most of the day so my body wouldn’t let me cram more sweets into my face. It worked obviously. I really wanted to eat that whole cake.

So my Start Of Day measurements are as follows:
Weight: 174.4
Chest: 102
Waist: 88
R Bicep: 35.5
L Bicep: 35
R Quad: 58
L Quad: 58
R Calf: 40
L Calf: 41

I didn’t measure myself after cheat day, but my post binge weight was 176.6 lbs.

This morning I woke up and tipped the scales at 174.8 lbs. That’s right haters. I’m basically back to my pre-binge weight and all the exercise included was laying down and breathing. Here are my measurements from this morning. Some of them are weird, but whatever.

Chest: 102
Waist: 84
R B: 36
L B: 34.5
R Q: 59
L Q: 59
R C: 40
L C: 40.5

It’s the bicep and calf ones that throw me. Oh well. My waist went down 4 cm after bingeing and my quads went up 1 cm each. I have really big, fatty legs so that doesn’t shock me. The cake went right to my thighs as they say on the other side of the divide.

There you have it. My first cheat day that actually got to post. I’m so proud myself. Now I want cake…

Until another day,

ScottyHump

Now saying that in North Bay was easy because the population there is about 90% white people. Now that I’m in Halifax there are way more Eastern Indians that come into the store.

Now I know that not everyone from Iraq, Afganistan and Pakistan are terrorists. I’m not a fucking idiot. It wouldn’t surprise me if less than 1% of those populations were terrorists, but we judge hard in North America. Don’t say you don’t judge, because you do. The U.S. is arguably more judgemental than we are in Canada, but don’t be naïve.

I saw a group of maybe 30 people in the mall yesterday all with matching white shirts (with a black strip around the neck hole), black dress pants and black dress shoes. My first thought was “Oh shit there’s a cult in the mall looking for people to convert!” And I guaran-fucking-tee you that I wasn’t the only person that noticed and thought something similar or worse.

So when I serve these customers I hesitate using my usual phrasing. I’ve used it once consciously and it got a big laugh. I don’t know if it was a “this just got really awkward when you said that laugh” or a “that was hilarious” laugh. Am I racist for thinking that?

What is more racist? me saying “don’t be a terrorist” to an East Indian person? or not saying it because they’re East Indian? I would say not saying it because that’s judging their race to the nth degree. But I’m not one to make situations awkward so I don’t want to say it. I’m so glad this is all in my head… Oh burdens. Thou art a cruel and evil witch.

I don’t know. Does even asking that question make me a racist? or does it just mean that I can have a rational thought about a pressing issue in today’s society? I’m confused about the whole thing.

Anyway I just wanted to get that out there. If you have any thoughts toss ‘em down in the comment box.

Until another day,

ScottyHump