I-Speak

before leaving, a note :)

2011-03-22T13:57:00.000+08:00

fuNky_sOuL has up and left.

But not without fondly remembering this space.

Find my, hopefully, more improved rambling and more at

http://thisismykungfu.blogspot.com

That'll be the URL, with a different blog name until I think of something more fitting.

I am open to suggestions though, for both. Anyone? Leave me a comment.

Time to feel the rush: Goal Rush 7 on Dec 12

2010-12-08T16:27:00.000+08:00

men’s and women’s divisions
REG: Php 2200. Less P200 for registration completed before DEC 12, 2010

REGISTRATION 7:30 AM - 8:30 AM
GAME STARTS AT 9:00 AM
VENUE: DEPT OF AGRARIAN REFORM GYM,
(NEAR PHILCOA) ELLIPTICAL ROAD, DILIMAN, QC

PRE-REGISTRATION: UPLOAD FORM THRU
HTTP://WWW.FACEBOOK.COM/SIKAD
FOR FURTHER INQUIRY,
CONTACT US AT: 09055247670

the name of this survey is counting blue cars

2010-11-20T22:20:00.001+08:00

The shuffling of my n3110c's music player was done on the 2nd of November. But i'm just going over the post and the songs now before publishing this. So there's a 12-day discrepancy. So many things have happened since then. So even if this is no longer reflective of the current state of things, i'll still post this for record-keeping (OC much)

from Farah

Directions:
1. Put your music on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag friends who might enjoy doing the meme as well as the person you got the meme from. =)

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY?" YOU SAY ...
chasing pavements - adele
"Should I give up / Or should I just keep chasin' pavements?"

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
slo mo - eraserheads
"Walang pakialam / Kahit anong kalabasan ... Ang daming ninanais, ang daming kailangan / Pero walang panahon"

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY?
i love you just the way you are - billy joel
"I just want someone that I can talk to / I want you just the way you are"

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
seasons of love - from Rent
"Five hundred twenty-five thousand / six hundred minutes / how do you measure the life / of a woman or a man?"

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
say you'll be there -spice girls
"I'm giving you everything all that joy / can bring this I swear"

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
i do - lisa loeb
not a very positive this song. there's nothing here that would make a good motto. but in light of more recent events, this could fit: *grin*
"i will be ignored / i will be denied / i could be erased / i could be brushed aside / i will get scared, and i will get shoved down / but i feel like i do beause you push me around"

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
just like heaven - the cure
"You / lost and lonely / You / Strange as angels / Dancing in the deepest oceans / Twisting in the water"

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
runaway angel - mojofly
"Why don't you sit down and relax? / And gather up all the reasons to head back / just don't forget where you got / the soul in your art, the wings on your back ... Don't you regret what you've done / Go pray for the fun / Enough with the hurt"

WHAT IS 2+2?
ilang alon ang dala - wolfgang
"Isang butil ng sala / Ilang alon ang dala"

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
1979 - smashing pumpkins

"and i don't even care to shake these zipper blues / and we don't know / just where our bones will rest / to dust i guess / forgotten and absorbed into the earth below"

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
houki hoshi - younha

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
echo - incubus

"Could you show me dear / Something I've not seen / Something infinitely interesting"

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
smoke gets in your eyes - johnny mathis

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
ni yao de ai - penny tai

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
will you be there - mj
"everyone's taking control of me / seems that the world's got a role for me"

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
girl anachronism - the dresden dolls

"behold the world's worst accident / i am the girl anachronism"

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
needs - collective soul
"Here I slumber to awaken my daze / I find convenience in this savior I save"

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
hinahanap-hanap kita - rivermaya
"Adik sa 'yo"

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
you and me song - the wannadies
"But it's you and... Me and we'll always be together" --> fail

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
kung ayaw mo huwag mo - rivermaya
"Hindi kita mapipilit kung ayaw mo / 'wag mo akong isipin bahala ka"

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
gold digger - jamie foxx/kanye west
"yeah she's a triflin' friend indeed / yeah she's a gold digger way over town / that digs on me"

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
jigsaw falling into place - radiohead
interesting idea --> "Before you run away from me / Before you start unravelling / Before you take my mic / Just as you dance, dance, dance"

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
la copa la vida - ricky martin

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
beat it - fall out boy ft. john mayer
another FAIL

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
just a phase - incubus
"Now my only consolation is that this could not / Last forever even though you’re singing and thinking / How well you got it made"

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
1/3 junjou no kanjou - siam shade

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
waka waka - shakira
"You're on the front line / Everyone's watching We are getting closer / This isn't over / The pressure is on"

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
empire state of mind - jayz alicia keys
"These streets will make you feel brand new / Big lights will inspire you"

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
canon in d - pachelbel canon

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
walking after you - foo fighters

"I cannot be without you / matter of fact / I'm on your back / if you walk out on me..."

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Counting Blue Cars - Dishwalla

all the shiz: the PFF story so far

2010-10-19T12:15:00.002+08:00

*Cross-posted from funkysoul.multiply.com where file attachments of some of the news reports can be found (just scroll to the bottom of the post).

Alright. It's about time. I've not been privy to his dealings in the past, but what I hear from a reliable source, this guy's got to go.

After more than a hundred years since the Philippine Football Federation's (PFF) establishment, fans and players of the sport have yet to see a support system that would be at least par with what the PBA enjoys. Despite the wealth of talent concentrated mostly in the Visayas and Mindanao areas, the Philippines is languishing behind its Asian neighbors, and majority of Filipinos have no idea that we have a football team.

The prevailing me-first-before-others culture among many (majority?) of our supposed public servants have brought on this almost century-long stagnation. Lack of vision and love of self. Those and probably, incompetence.

As Joaquin Henson pointed out (The Philippine Star, September 2, 2010), it would be interesting to find out if the Philippines' improvement in the FIFA world rankings last year was due to attendance or performance. And with the oodles of money lavished on us by FIFA, the AFC and our richer Asian neighbors, we would like to see where all this money has gone, and why, with the number of coaches, referees, players and expats who dutifully try their best to promote the sport here, the PFF and Philippine football is nowhere near the capabilities of such Asian powerhouses as South Korea, North Korea and Japan - and us being a 113-year old federation. The PFF doesn't even have adequate storage space to store their equipment that their futsal balls are being lugged around by an employee in the trunk of his/her car.

Jack Biantan sent in this commentary to the Inside Sports column in The Philippine Star, published on September 5, 2010 (emphasis mine):

London-based Cebu sportswriter Jack Biantan sent in a commentary about the state of Philippine football today.

'What has the Philippine Football Federation (PFF) done for football?' sighed Biantan. 'Referees seminars? Coaches seminars? But where are the tournaments? What will the coaches and referees do without tournaments? What has the PFF done to the money left behind by the previous administration? And the millions that Sepp Blatter of FIFA gifted to all developing member countries? The PFF is one of the richest sports associations in the Philippines. Just go to their headquarters and you will see how rich they are. Just check where the president has traveled these past two years - first class - and you will be scandalized by his extravagance.

'Last year, the PFF asked Cebu to spearhead its Vision Asia football development program. The Asian Football Confederation (AFC) allocated millions for this. The Cebu Football Association (CFA) jumped on the project and picked coaches who were supposed to be paid by Vision Asia money. Days passed, then weeks, then months. But where was the money for the coaches?

'When CFA president Richard Montayre went to Manila to look for the money, he did not get any answer except for an e-mail from the PFF president chiding him for writing the AFC about the funds. Eventually, the project ground to a halt. Pocketing the coaches' stipends is beyond my imagination. It is the lowest of the low. I thought the PFF had a Board of Trustees made up of good men. I am convinced that Philippine football is facing one of its darkest hours.'

Ricky Olivares bares all in his column for the Business Mirror, again emphasis and italics mine:

"The Philippine Football Federation (PFF) receives $250,000 every year from Fifa. That translates into roughly P12,000,000. That makes is the second most moneyed National Sports Agency following the Samahang Basketbol ng Pilipinas. Yet in terms of progress, it is one of the worst. Progress is slow, the results are disappointing, and unity is nonexistent. The various football associations hardly get along and are suspicious of one another’s motives.

Said an old-timer in the local football scene, “Before Fifa began to give money no one wanted to get involved. When the money started coming in, everyone wanted in.”

The money sent by Fifa is supposed to be used for a national tournament, coaches and grassroots training, disbursement to the member associations for various projects, and quite a few more. Once the budgets are drawn up for national and regional projects, it is supposed to be taken up by the Board of Governors for approval.

But like in this republic of dangerous minds, that has not been the case in recent years. Nothing has gone to the football associations for years now. There is no national tournament. The men’s and women’s national teams are funded by the managers. Instead, the money has been used to increase the PFF’s assets by investing money with persons not associated with football and hiring the marketing services of a group that delivered nothing. Instead, the money has been used and misused.

One football association has had enough. The Cebu Football Federation behind its officers Richard Montayre and Dick Emperado (FA president of Dumaguete), filed a case against PFF president Jose Mari Martinez for falsification of documents last month.

In a meeting with Montayre two months ago, he disclosed how he was surprised to come across a notarized document dated November 28, 2009, that stated that any two of the following three persons—PFF president Jose Mari Martinez, PFF treasurer Antonio Marty and PFF managing consultant Henry Tsai—were authorized signatories to the NSA’s corporate account with Banco de Oro.

Montayre and Emperado were both present in the meeting but the issue of adding a third signatory—Tsai’s— was never taken up.

And in another document prepared by then “acting general secretary” Ramon Manuel sent to the bank dated June 19, 2010, it mentioned a new board resolution that stated only Martinez and Marty could authorize the movement of the PFF funds. Coincidentally, around that time, the word filtering from the offices of the PFF in Pasig City about a falling out between Martinez and Tsai.

Montayre contends that there was no such board meeting. And furthermore, asked Montayre, “Who is Henry Tsai? No one knows him in the local football scene. So how could he have been a member of the board?”

I managed to secure the mobile-phone number and tried getting in touch with Mr. Tsai and his wife but received no reply. I tried calling again and it was his brother, Peter, who picked up and said he did not know anything about Tsai’s involvement with the PFF. While also surfing the Internet for any information about Tsai, I came across some disturbing information (blog.henrytsai.com) that, of course, may or may not be true.

During a board meeting on September 25, Martinez shed light on Tsai’s “appointment.” “I had to find a solution to Mr. Marty leaving for abroad and the solution was to get Tsai. But before Tsai could be a signatory, he had to fulfill 4 criteria he set... first, as a manager of the Futsal team, second, as a fallback since the PFF always lacked money before the end of the year; thirdly, to rent the ground floor for P40,000 a month; and fourthly, to sell football products.”

And this begs even more questions. Why did Martinez require Tsai to fulfill four requirements to be able to be a signatory to PFF checks? What’s in it for Tsai? And what interests does Martinez have?

Martinez was stripped of his right to authorize transactions from the BDO account.

In that meeting, the Naga FA’s Atty. Anlu Carpio questioned Tsai’s appointment without board approval.

I was able to secure a PFF memorandum dated June 15, four days before the document sent to the bank that excluded Tsai from being an authorized signatory to the savings account. The memo was from Tsai and it had him listed as “Executive Vice President of the PFF” and the subject matter was regarding “overtime, weekends, and holiday access to the PFF building.”

While asking other local football officials about Tsai’s appointment, they expressed surprise and anger. “We knew no such thing about his appointment or involvement in the federation,” said National Capital Region FA president Pocholo Borromeo.

The PFF’s House of Football in Pasig was built through the Fifa Goal Project that helps in the creation of technical centers or headquarters where the NSA can effectively run its operations. It is technically Fifa property and cannot be used for anything else, at least not without permission from Fifa.

A check of the expenses of the PFF in the past year showed, among others, a disbursement of some money to the Pagadian Football Association, an honorarium to the Board Treasurer (Marty), expenses for the PFF Futsal Cup, and some other football-related matters.

On the other hand, it also revealed some curious entries: payment for Bayantel numbers not used by the PFF,sliced cheese bought from Martinez, SM appliances and car expenses, Valle Verde Country Club shares bought and enjoyed by its three signatories (Martinez, Tsai and Gerry Ledonio, marketing head) and “investments” by Tsai.

There are also numerous particulars for payments for credit cards and loans.

And that is just the tip of the iceberg.

Thus, the Board of Governors has now appropriately acted and ordered an audit of PFF's expenses.

MANILA, Philippines - An external audit has been ordered by the Philippine Football Federation (PFF) Board of Governors to get to the bottom of a financial mess that may lead to the resignation of president Jose Mari Martinez.

Mariano Araneta Jr., president of the Iloilo Football Association and newly appointed chairman of the PFF financial committee, said yesterday the Board has designated Tereso Campos to conduct an audit of the books of accounts in the wake of reports of arbitrary disbursements, extravagant expenses, missing funds and unauthorized obligations to third parties.

Martinez came under fire in a recent Board meeting at the PFF office and reportedly offered to resign in November after a motion was filed to force a leave of absence pending results of the audit. But Araneta said Martinez later held back, insisting to stay on the job because of his close relationship with Asian Football Confederation (AFC) president Mohamed Bin Hammam of Qatar.

Araneta declined to accuse Martinez of any wrongdoing until the audit determines accountability even as the PFF president was charged in court by two Board members, Richard Montayre of Cebu and Dick Emperado of Negros Oriental, for falsifying public documents in relation to designating a bank signatory.

What bothers Araneta is the PFF’s “topsy-turvy” accounting which caused the issuance of bouncing checks to provincial affiliates and coaches despite a healthy donation of P16.8 million from FIFA this year. FIFA deposits $250,000 annually in the PFF account. Sharing the profits of the World Cup, FIFA pledged an additional $250,000 to the PFF this year and so far, has remitted $125,000.

With so much money coming in, Araneta said he was shocked when the PFF’s balance in its dollar bank account was only $203.80 last July 31. In reviewing the PFF’s cash flows from January to August, Araneta noted a payment of P3.79 million for a loan and “money for safekeeping” amounting to P2.89 million to Henry Tsai whom Martinez named as bank signatory without Board approval.

“We don’t know how Mr. Tsai is involved,” said Araneta. “He is supposed to be a managing consultant. We’ve been told he claims to be the assistant to our treasurer and the PFF executive vice president, a position that doesn’t exist. All we know is we recently received a demand letter from Mr. Tsai’s lawyers that the PFF owes him P1.58 million.”

Araneta, 56, said it appears that Martinez helped himself to the PFF funds. “There are payments for his hospital bills of P160,000 even with a $2,500 medical insurance, credit card statements of close to P300,000 and cell phone bills,” he said. “A membership was paid for at Valle Verde with Mr. Tsai one of the beneficiaries. Payments were made to a group called G-World for services to produce a TV show and stage a fund-raising event that lost money. We are looking into the ownership of G-World.”

Before Martinez took over the PFF helm, past president Johnny Romualdez never drew a salary and used no more than P3,000 a month for his PFF-related expenses, including representation. Martinez, however, receives a monthly salary of P25,000 and an allocation for his other expenses. The PFF’s monthly payroll has ballooned to P360,000 a month.

Araneta said an example of Martinez’ extravagance was when he flew business class to South Africa for the recent World Cup with legal counsel Corsi Cruz and contractor Ding Wenceslao. FIFA travel consultant Marco Wirz provided funds for economy tickets of $5,850 but Martinez went overboard by $10,600 and even extended staying in South Africa by two days, incurring additional cost for the PFF.

Araneta said he suspects hanky-panky because the books show the PFF borrowing money for expenses. Credit card charges were in round figures, indicating a withdrawal of cash to meet certain financial demands.

“From what we are told, the PFF had $30,000 in BDO and P1.6 million in BPI,” said Araneta. “We want to know where that money went. Maybe, the funds from FIFA were invested somewhere and disappeared which may be why we’re seeing loans being made. We understand Mr. Tsai has been Mari’s associate for over 20 years. Mr. Tsai even rents space in the PFF building at P40,000 a month but we don’t see that reflected in the books. We’re not accusing anyone of anything. We’ll wait for the audit results before we make conclusions. All we want is to clean house. There are sponsors willing to help Philippine football but they’re hesitant to invest because of reports of financial problems.”

Araneta said the falsification charges against Martinez are not as grave as if he is found to be guilty of malversation. “We want to pinpoint accountability,” said Araneta, a former national football player from 1975 to 1984 and a UP engineering graduate. “A money issue is non-negotiable. If Mari is liable, he must answer for his accountability. It’s possible that this is case of gross mismanagement without malice involved. The audit should reveal everything we want to know.”

In a portent of things to come, Araneta said Martinez has been delisted as a signatory in one of the PFF’s bank accounts by the Board.

Since assuming the PFF presidency two years ago, Martinez has been dogged by two resignations as secretary-general. Pablito Araneta and Cyril Dofitas previously served before Chito Manuel was appointed.

And just so you know there's truth behind some of these accusations, which would no doubt lead us to the conclusion that Martinez is engaged in dealings without the consent of the Board of Governors, have a listen to this recording here of one of the PFF's board meetings.

FIFA has already inquired about the misuse of the funds they allocated for various football programs but the latest news I have is that the PFF hasn't replied satisfactorily to their queries.

Meanwhile, Martinez has already been charged with falsification of public documents (PDI, October 1, 2010) since he has declined to resign (Cebu Daily News, October 4, 2010).

Thanks to bleachersbrew.blogspot.com, filipinofootball.blogspot.com and other concerned individuals for the article sources.

15 movies meme

2010-10-12T16:19:00.000+08:00

I'm gearing up for a serious post, and I think I'd do this first to flex my writing muscles, so to speak.

The meme: off the top of your head, name 15 movies that stand out/are memorable/which will stick to you forever. Here's my list.

1. Chungking Express (1994)

The only Wang-Kar Wai film I've watched before this was Happy Together, starting from somewhere in the middle to somewhere before the ending, in the midst of a possibly PanPil19 class at the CAL AVR when I was supposed to be watching a film for our SocSci2 class (honest mistake - our sked said venue's at CAL AVR at that same time, so how was I to know? I did realize, after only seeing these lovers dancing around each other's emotions and bad days, that the subject matter was totally far out from what I was supposed to be watching). Years later, I became curious about him, and luckily my friend Joyce had vcds of his films. So there, I got a copy.

I am a sucker for romance and happy endings. While a very young Takeshi Kaneshiro was pining away after his ex- girlfriend who left him, counting over the days until he can no longer eat tinned pineapple with expiry dates of May 31, in the first story of Chungking Express, I can't say I was totally engrossed by him (even if he is such a looker). I knew not about lovesickness, and the subtle emotions manifested as police detective Kaneshiro and the blonde-haired eyeglasses-clad businesswoman dealing in illegal paraphernalia chanced upon each other when they were both feeling like failures and in need of cheering up, and bound their fates to each other (or so I hope it would happen). I was more excited about the second arc, involving Tony Leung doing regular police patrol duty, and Faye Wong, a seemingly unfeminine attendant at a sidewalk store selling coffee, salad and whatnots. The moment I saw them together, there was no doubt they'd make a great couple, even if Faye Wong was an unconventional woman and store attendant. There's nothing flattering about what she wears at work, very long flowy skirt up to her ankles when she's out on errands with circular shades (ala Vash the Stampede), her boss makes her mop the floor in front of the store (the other male Indian employees only stay at the back of the shop seemingly to cook), and plays California Dreamin' by The Mamas and the Papas at deafening volumes when she's alone at the shop. Tony Leung either buys black coffee or chef's salad to bring home to his stewardess girlfriend. Eventually, she leaves him, and the owner suggests he take out a variety of girls, including Faye Wong. Nothing happens though, but eventually, Tony is able to have conversations with Faye. Things take off when his ex-girlfriend leaves a letter for him with his house key at the store. Faye is attracted to him first, talking to him when she passed him by the street eating while she was hauling something very heavy. Tony, the gentleman that he is, offers to carry it for her. Faye was just so cute, making up excuses so that she could stay in Tony's place, cleaning and fixing his stuff and replacing his supplies.

Tony's really oblivious character is naive to all the changes happening but he also offers insights in the clever way that Wong-Kar Wai's mind works in realizing the internal debates and monologues of a love-torn person, suggesting metaphors in the appearance of the soap and the rags. I'm now giving you a spoiler-rich synopsis but I just can't get enough of how cute the two are (yes, cute - I'm sorry I can't find any other mature words for them because I usually see things shallowly like that). Those two are absolutely the only reason you need to watch Chungking Express.

2. Little Miss Sunshine (2006)

Okay, I'll not go overboard this time. If anything, a really interesting beginning - a spectacled chubby girl imitating how Miss USA(?) reacts to the news of her winning the crown, a man talking about the 9 or is it 12(?) steps to something, similar to many self-help paradigms, seemingly to a big and enthusiastic crowd, a bearded man in white with bandages in his wrist getting ready for something, a teenage boy with an appearance that would fit right in at stereotypical teenage geek America doing push ups, a worried simply-dressed woman driving to somewhere (I forget what the granddad was doing).They are a father who's been trying for years to gain success with his steps to success, a depressed gay Marcel Proust scholar who tried to kill himself, a grandfather who smokes weed and still craves for a sex-filled life, a son who's got a world of his own and has resolved to not speak following Nietzsche (for about 9 months running already), a wife who has to contend with running a household and now, taking care of her depressed brother, and the young girl who only dreams of conquering America's beauty pageants but is a far cry from the media's image of beautiful, let alone pretty or cute. Seemingly a movie about a dysfunctional family, but really, these are just the quirks of this particular family, manifesting themselves as they make the journey so that the girl's dream of joining a beauty pageant come to fruition, a trip that changes everyone's views on each of their family members and about life, getting over these quirks and annoying/depressing events to make them more bonded to each other. Full of laughs and insights into an average family just making their way about life, this is memorable storytelling.

3. Almost Famous (2000)

Music. The 70s rock and roll culture. A writer/rock journalist. Three of the things I am almost crazy about. I believe I should've lived during the 70s high of rock and roll, indulged in the music and written about it. Offering an insight into the era, as well as the experiences of a young, barely-into-his-teens aspiring rock music writer touring with a band on the brink of fame and falling for the groupie who has eyes for someone else, experiencing betrayals, strained friendships, capturing the essence of a writer's life in the road during that rock-crazy period.

4. Kill Bill (2003 & 2004)

I'm more partial to the first part but it won't be complete without Vol. 2 for reasons you may see later. This was a revolutionary film for me. Combining a non-linear narrative with material that shifted from colored film to animation to black-and-white film and back, unafraid to show the unconventional such as violent fight scenes and their outcomes - blood spurting forth from punctured or severed body parts, ultra-cool, never-seen-before ways of dying as delivered by Uma Thurman's character out for revenge, and the intriguing premise of The Bride searching out the members of the deadly team she belonged to. Something we'll only come to expect from such a one as Quentin Tarantino.

5. 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

Okay, THIS is the ultimate feel-good teen movie for me. Shakespeare-inspired or not, Julia Stiles' highly strung, opinionated, feisty Katarina Stratford and Heath Ledger's sensible, seemingly bad-boy, rebellious type coming together after the most undesirable of circumstances - what can I say? I absolutely love how people's actions change other people. Cameron's pining for the younger Bianca Stratford, probably the only well-known of Larisa Oleynik's foray into movies (she's better remembered as Alex Mack), sets things in motion, in a story graced by the typical annoying jock in looks and personality, the geeky romance between Michael and Mandella, an Afro-American teacher who expresses the Old Bard in a unique way and tells his students to do so, spawning that famous poem, a seemingly innocuous guidance counselor on the outside but a closet avid erotic fiction writer, and an overprotective Dad who eventually comes to terms to the fact that he can't keep his daughters by his side forever. Love is simply amazing, even in the very simple way that this movie tackles it.

6. Ice Age (2002)

Watched more than 10 times. I can tell you in advance what line will be the response to a dialog. A mammoth with commitment problems, a sloth who just hangs on to the next big creature who can and will tolerate as well as protect him, a sleuth saber who learns about loyalty, and their journey to return the humans' offspring as they dodge avalanches, glacier-melting lava flows, blizzards, fossils and hieroglyphs, what passes for architecture, primitive sports and a pack of hungry, revengeful sabers - one helluva adventure filled with laughs and funny comments about that epoch in the earth's existence.

7. Fight Club (1999)

The Fight Club itself and how Edward Norton patiently bears all his troubles to reinvent himself as the maniacal carefree leader of Project Mayhem, the surprise Norton/Pitt personality split, and the hard edge and pulsing pace of the film's execution make for one explosive film.

8. Kamikaze Girls (2004)

The title was enough to make me curious. The seemingly delicate Lolita-clad character of Youko Fukuda and Anna Tsuchiya's wild but sensitive biker girl overcome odds to forge a strong friendship that puts all the other violent bikergirls in their places.

9. Sen to Chihiro no Kamikakushi / Spirited Away (2001)

Felt a lot like a Disney film, I thought, when I first saw it, but with a distinctly oriental feel. Eventually, I didn't think Disney can create films such as these without Studio Ghibli and Miyazaki's insight and Japanese nature. Wonderful colors, a setting that can only be conceived in the imagination (the train ride underwater notwithstanding), a colorful cast of characters (including the witch's oversized baby and its three cohorts), a story basic to human nature. Studio Ghibli and Miyazaki are all about masterpieces of animation.

10. The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)

Watched this after one Noche Buena when I was around 8, this is the first animated movie that amazed me because of its distinct style, unusual story and the musical element which was already unusual as it was the gothic characters who were giving life to the show as they take over and return the celebration of Christmas to the bearded red man.

11. The Breakfast Club (1985)

If it wasn't for the celebration of its 20th anniversary on MTV, I wouldn't have discovered this. Naturally I was curious, because of its teen-centric story. Repressed angst towards school, parents, peers and society bring together this motley crew of students who almost had nothing to do with each other until that Saturday detention. As they day wears on, they discover that they all just want the same thing. It doesn't change their lives immediately, but that day makes an impact on them all as they welcome others who are not part of their circle or comfort zones before.

12. My Sassy Girl - original Korean version (2001)

The turn that their partnership follows, their subsequent unconventional relationship - even if the girl would be the stuff of boyfriends' nightmares everywhere what with her violent streak and very assertive nature - absolutely endearing. If there were two people fated to be together, it would be them.

13. Chicago (2002)

The theater does provide a lot of great material. I didn't think I'd be engrossed by this film, but at the outset, it plunged me into the world of entertaining and the dirty side of it, complete with cabaret and jazz numbers detailing the lives of entertainers aspiring for fame and fortune, only to fall on the wrong side of it, and have to defend themselves and their careers before gossip-crazy reporters. Catherine Zeta-Jones is amazing, introducing as to her crime-blitzy world as she performs All That Jazz and the characters in prison render a very visual number about their exploits that landed them in jail in the first place. Intelligently executed and superbly entertaining.

14. Memento (2000)

Christopher Nolan is an absolute genius. Long before Inception and The Dark Knight, Nolan showcased his depth at weaving stories with Memento, telling a story from the point of view of a one who only retains his long-term memories, so that everyday is like a new day to him, as he deciphers what happened and what crimes were perpetrated to protect himself. I have not the skill to justify just how much every single person should watch this, if only to marvel at Nolan's talent.

15. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)

This is memorable because this exposed me to the loveliness (c'mon! the hair, the smooth and fair skin - sorry fangirl mode) and bundle of effective elven techniques that is Legolas Greenleaf, Prince of Mirkwood, deliciously portrayed by Orlando Bloom. It also showed me the richness not just in scenery but in culture and history of Tolkien's Middle Earth since I slept through The Fellowship of the Ring when I watched it.

hero

Honorable Mentions:

- Hero (2002)

Colors! Vivid motifs with a narrative that deceives you and unfurls itself at the very last minute.

- Cruel Intentions (1999)

Rich arrogance meets innocent, sensitive humbleness and turns his world the other way around. Romance, yes, but the tragic kind.

- Mr. and Mrs. Smith (2005)

Brangelina was scorching hot here. I say these two personalities are a perfect match, and their characters and their world in the movie are grand and befitting of their stature. Okay, so I'm amazed by explosive sequences, fight scenes and against all odds stories. Plus, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt? There's nothing more to ask for.

And because of that last one, I need to add...

-Transformers (2007)

Besides the effects and the transformers themselves, the energy of this film and the fact that all the females except for Sam's mom are hot and kickass are the reasons which make this film amazing.

P.S. Now, I don't think I'll be able to write those more serious posts since I spent almost three hours on this meme. I wish I would write faster. Or else make my thoughts more concise onscreen. (I was going to write about the current state of the PFF and one other thing... Maybe later).

Yeah! The Yeah Yeah Yeahs

2010-08-20T14:13:00.000+08:00

I'm having a blast listening to the Yeah Yeah Yeahs. They've been around for a decade and it's only now that I discover them. WTF right? I have so missed a lot. They're amazing! Well, at least I've just been playing Fever to Tell (2003) and Show Your Bones (2006) on repeat, so I've no idea about the more recent albums. But with their talent, imagine them only a trio producing such an interesting array of sound, I'm almost sure those are going to be amazing as well. I love Karen O's energy when she's performing and the immensely interesting personality hiding behind the sort of clothes she wears and the sometimes unreadable or bland expressions on her face. (And I love how Nick looks too *grin*)

I can't describe everything about her style, being fashion jargon-illiterate, but you see how talented she is. She can be overly loud and then simple next time. In the third pic, she's wearing that see through plastic(?) over a blue skirt with matching blue stockings in their video for Zero. Nick just does amazing things with his guitar. And Brian's there supporting the great blend of her Pat Benatar-reminiscent voice and Nick's amazing concoctions of rhythm, punk/dance beats and those amazing (sorry, can't think of other adjectives right now) wailing guitar riffs that work just right. I haven't gone into the lyrics yet but I will soon enough.

Let's backtrack just a bit. Let's go into how I got addicted to them, my second addiction since LJ this month (see previous post). Okay, so I thought I'd listen to them one day knowing that Maps has been one of their more popular songs (and they're not pop so I'd know there's substance to this band). I didn't know it's been seven years since the song was released. So I get a hold of the band's discography. And I listen. And I like what I'm listening. And then I'm talking about it to a friend, and he raved about how powerful Karen O's emotions were in the song's video. And so I track it down (thank goodness for youtube - no thanks to the content-blocking capitalist companies). And I'm blown away. And so here I am ten days later, a devoted fan. And what made me love them more is the following performance at the Reading Festival in 2006 (I wish we had things like those here, but tough luck kid!). Karen is amazing and energetic as usual, and she just seemed to enjoy performing a lot. And her voice has such that wide range; I didn't think anybody would be doing that kind of wailing she did at Gold Lion. And even if I love the original Maps, the emotion-filled acoustic version is still amazing. Hay... So am I winning you over now? Watch.

new blogspace

2010-08-20T13:54:00.002+08:00

I just started this new thing. And I'm steadily getting hooked, what with all the Mannschaft-loving people and communities (read: picspams, fanfics, icons) over there (which is also how I got to be in love more than ever with the German national team - a level which was just waiting to be achieved, given my penchant to obsess about things given the right stimulus, which in this case is overexposure to the thing in question).

Now I'm no longer sure where I'd be posting when I get the urge to write or record something down. I for one never thought I'd be crossing over to that side. But as of late, I'd been feeling more inclined to write when I'm in LJ. Must be the feeling of community. But then again, that reason may just be misplaced. Anyhoo, if anyone's interested, I've got a feed of my LJ posts at the sidebar, near enough to the top.It's just sad that it doesn't expand, unlike in wordpress where the older entries expand, giving you a preview of the entry. Anyway, I'll just work with this now. Of course I won't be giving this up. So then, see you when I see you. :D

On lies

2010-08-13T04:47:00.000+08:00

One episode from the first season of 3rd Rock from the Sun dealt with lying, a new phenomenon the four alien characters recently discovered about the human experience. It was something that can be used in certain situations for certain purposes. They realized it was quite powerful in making somebody feel like they're something big. For instance, Dr. Albright successfully twisted words to make Dr. Dick Solomon, the high Commander (and father figure) of these band of aliens and hotshot physics professor substitute for her in a meeting with the "Knights of the Living Dead," their co-professors in the university. Dick was oblivious to this, and because he was in love with Albright, he didn't think that she'd do anything like lying to him. Sally discovered this when she went out to buy soap after the boys complained that she didn't smell like the other girls of their acquaintances. She was lured into trying out various potions for an ultimately high maintenance lifestyle via free samples. When she came back to get more, she found out she had to buy them at an exorbitant price. And that's when she clued in that the beauty industry is just out to make women look at themselves and ply them with more products to make them beautiful, thus making them fell good, and that's how they continue bringing in money. The adolescent Tommy meanwhile, is walking through a tightrope as he struggles to maintain his relationship with fellow sensible schoolmate August, and he knows that one wrong word from him will mean she's out of her life - something he wouldn't dream of happening.

They had more insights about it at the usual end-of-the-show group musing while looking up at the stars, previously done in the university parking lot, but later on in the comfort of their own rooftop. I don't remember most of it now, though you should watch this series (download if you must since it's quite old - Joseph Gordon-Levitt is what, 11 years old here?) and see how we would see human nature if we weren't born as one. And then one of them posed this very enlightened (at least, from the Filipino perspective) question:

What if a politican takes hold of it?

And the answer:

It would be horrible.

Exactly.

Propagating colonial education: the undoing of the Filipinos

2010-08-09T22:51:00.002+08:00

There are moves to increase the number of years the Filipino student will take up basic education. From the previous 10 years - six years of primary/elementary and four years of secondary/high school, there's a proposal to increase it by two more years, similar to other developed countries in the world. I heard from the news tonight that the two additional years will enable the inclusion of other courses that could pave the way for a vocational career e.g., in agriculture or fisheries. I thought this was similar to the shop classes in the US, where the students either learn woodcraft, metalworks or other crafts that they can make a living out of. I don't know if there are other concrete programs that the government is proposing to justify this move, other than that it will provide the future worker with more means of supposedly earning income.

Now, after reading the Miseducation of the Filipino by Renato Constantino, there begs the question of whether what we are actually teaching our children is what they ought to be learning. The current quality of education the learning public is receiving is not good enough, what with the very low allocation of budget of providing one of the basic rights of the Filipinos. And what's more, it's not the type to foster stability and development in the citizenry, the foremost element a state or sovereignty relies on to ensure its continuity. We are still under the vestiges of the colonial education the Americans have bestowed on us to easily subvert our feelings and ideas so that they could do all they wanted with our country, which after having been under 300 years of Spanish rule also seemed lost as a people culturally, because all vestiges of our Filipino-ness have been removed, and alas, not allowed to flourish. Thus, the lack of nationalism among the Filipinos, the apathy towards what is happening now and what will happen in the future.

We as a people should imbibe what being a Filipino means, and developing ourselves culturally. There are many points expounded by Mr. Constantino in his text, and though it was written in 1959, it is still glaringly accurate today, 50 years after it was written. That shows us how backward everything the government has been doing is, reflecting the values of our political leaders and our people as a whole that is self-serving and in the long run, detrimental to our development as a state.

Mr. Constantino explains it best. Please, no matter how long it is, finish reading it.

The Miseducation of the Filipino
by Renato Constantino
(text from http://kalamagz.multiply.com)

Education is a vital weapon of a people striving for economic emancipation, political independence and cultural renaissance. We are such a people. Philippine education therefore must produce Filipinos who are aware of their country's problems, who understand the basic solution to these problems, and who care enough to have courage to work and sacrifice for their country's salvation.

Nationalism in Education
In recent years, in various sectors of our society, there have been nationalist stirrings which were crystallized and articulated by the late Claro M. Recto, There were jealous demands for the recognition of Philippine sovereignty on the Bases question. There were appeals for the correction of the iniquitous economic relations between the Philippines and the United States. For a time, Filipino businessmen and industrialists rallied around the banner of the FILIPINO FIRST policy, and various scholars and economists proposed economic emancipation as an intermediate goal for the nation. In the field of art, there have been signs of a new appreciation for our own culture. Indeed, there has been much nationalist activity in many areas of endeavor, but we have yet to hear of a well-organized campaign on the part of our educational leaders for nationalism in education.

Although most of our educators are engaged in the lively debate on techniques and tools for the improved instructions, not one major educational leader has come out for a truly nationalist education. Of course some pedagogical experts have written on some aspects of nationalism in education. However, no comprehensive educational programme has been advanced as a corollary to the programmes for political and economic emancipation. This is a tragic situation because the nationalist movement is crippled at the outset by a citizenry that is ignorant of our basic ills and is apathetic to our national welfare.

New Perspective
Some of our economic and political leaders have gained a new perception of our relations with the United States as a result of their second look at Philippine-American relations since the turn of the century. The reaction which has emerged as economic and political nationalism is an attempt on their part to revise the iniquities of the past and to complete the movement started by our revolutionary leaders of 1896. The majority of our educational leaders, however, still continue to trace their direct lineal descent to the first soldier-teachers of the American invasion army. They seem oblivious to the fact that the educational system and philosophy of which they are proud inheritors were valid only within the framework of American colonialism.

The educational system introduced by the Americans had to correspond and was designed to correspond to the economic and political reality of American conquest.

Capturing Minds
The most effective means of subjugating a people is to capture their minds. Military victory does not necessarily signify conquest. As long as feelings of resistance remain iin the hearts of the vanquished, no conqueror is secure. This is best illustrated by the occupation of the Philippines by the Japanese militarists during the Second World War.

Despite the terroristic regime imposed by the Japanese warlords, the Filipinos were never conquered. Hatred for the Japanese was engendered by their oppressive techniques which in turn were intensified by the stubborn resistance of the Filipino people. Japanese propagandists and psychological warfare experts, however, saw the necessity of winning the minds of the people.

Had the Japanese stayed longer, Filipino children who were being schooled under the auspices of the new dispensation would have grown into strong pillars of the Greater East Asia Co-Prosperity Sphere. Their minds would have been conditioned to suit the policies of the Japanese imperialists.

The moulding of men's minds is the best means of conquest. Education, therefore, serves a weapon in wars of colonial conquest. This singular fact was well appreciated by the American military commander in the Philippines during the Filipino-American War. According to the census of 1903:

"....General Otis urged and furthered the reopening of schools, himself selecting and ordering the textbooks. Many officers, among them chaplains, were detailed as superintendent of schools, and many enlisted men, as teachers..."

The American military authorities had a job to do. They had to employ all means to pacify a people whose hopes for independence were being frustrated by the presence of another conqueror. The primary reason for the rapid introduction, on a large scale, of the American public school system in the Philippines was the conviction of the military leaders that no measure could so quickly promote the pacification of the islands as education. General Arthur McArthur, in recommending a large appropriation for school purposes, said:

"...This appropriation is recommended primarily and exclusively as an adjunct to military operations calculated to pacify the people and to procure and expedite the restoration of tranquility throughout the archipelago..."

Beginnings of Colonial Education
Thus, from its inception, the educational system of the Philippines was a means of pacifying a people who were defending their newly-won freedom from an invader who had posed as an ally.

The education of the Filipino under American sovereignty was an instrument of colonial policy. The Filipino has to be educated as a good colonial. Young minds had to be shaped to conform to American ideas. Indigenous Filipino ideals were slowly eroded in order to remove the last vestiges of resistance. Education served to attract the people to the new masters and at the same time to dilute their nationalism which had just succeeded in overthrowing a foreign power. The introduction of the American educational system was a means of defeating a triumphant nationalism. As Charles Burke Elliot said in his book, The Philippines:

"...To most Americans it seemed absurd to propose that any other language than English should be used over which their flag floated. But in the schools of India and other British dependencies and colonies and, generally, in all colonies, it was and still is customary to use the vernacular in the elementary schools, and the immediate adoption of English in the Philippine schools subjected America to the charge of forcing the language of the conquerors upon a defenseless people."

Of course, such a system of education as the Americans contemplated could be successful only under the direction of American teachers, as the Filipino teachers who had been trained in Spanish methods were ignorant of the English language... Arrangements were promptly made for enlisting a small army of teachers in the United States. At first they came in companies, but soon in battalions. The transport Thomas was fitted up for their accomodations and in July, 1901, it sailed from San Francisco with six hundred teachers - a second army of occupationsurely the most remarkable cargo ever carried to an Oriental colony.."

The American Vice-Governor
The importance of education as a colonial tool was never underestimated by the Americans. This may be clearly seen in the provision of the Jones Act which granted the Filipinos more autonomy. Although the government services were Filipinized, although the Filipinos were being prepared for self-government, the Department of Education was never entrusted to any Filipino.

Americans always headed this department. This was assured by Article 23 of the Jones Act which provided:

"..That there shall be appointed by the President, by and with the advice and consent of the Senate of the United States, a vice-governor of the Philippine Islands, who shall have all the powers of the governor-general in the case of a vacancy or temporary removal, resignation or disability of the governor-general, or in case of his temporary absence; and the said vice-governor shall be the head of the executive department known as the department of Public Instruction, which shall include the bureau of education and the bureau of health, and he may be assigned such other executive duties as the Governor-General may designate..."

Up to 1935, therefore, the head of this department was an American. And when a Filipino took over under the commonwealth, a new generation of "Filipino-American" had already been produced. There was no longer any need for American overseers in this filed because a captive generation had already come of age, thinking and acting like little Americans.

This does not mean, however, that nothing that was taught was of any value. We became literate in English to a certain extent. We were able to produce more men and women who could read and write. We became more conversant with the outside world, especially the American world.

A more widespread education such as the Americans would have been a real blessing had their educational programme not been the handmaiden of their colonial policy. Unfortunately for us, the success of education as a colonial weapon was complete and permanent. In exchange for a smattering of English, we yielded our souls. The stories of George Washington and Abraham Lincoln made us forget our own nationalism.

The American view of our history turned our heroes into brigands in our own eyes, distorted our vision of our future. The surrender of the Katipuneros was nothing compared to this final surrender, this leveling down of our lst defenses. Dr. Chester Hunt characterizes this surrender in these words:

"...The programme of cultural assimilation combined with a fairly rapid yielding of control resulted in the fairly general acceptance of American culture as the goal of Filipino society with the corollary that individual Americans were given a status of respect..."

This in a nutshell was (and to a great extent still is) the happy result of early educational policy because, within the framework of American colonialism, whenever there was a conflict between American and Filipino goals and interests, the schools guided us toward thought and action which could forward American interests.

Goals of American Education
The educational system established by the Americans could not have been for the sole purpose of saving the Filipinos from illiteracy and ignorance. Given the economic and political purposes of American occupation, education had to be consistent with these broad purposes of American colonial policy. The Filipinos had to be trained as citizens of an American colony.

The Benevolent Assimilation proclamation of President McKinley on December 21, 1898 at a time when Filipino forces were in control of the country except Manila, betrays the intention of the colonizers. Judge Blount in his book, The American Occupation of the Philippines, properly comments:

"..Clearly, from the Filipino point of view, the United States was now determined to 'spare them from the dangers of premature independence,' using such force as might be necessary for the accomplishment of that pious purpose..."

Despite the noble aims announced by the American authorities that the Philippines was theirs to protect and guide, the fact still remained that these people were a conquered nation whose national life had to be woven into the pattern of American dominance. Philippine education was shaped by the overriding factor of preserving and expanding American control. To achieve this, all separatist tendencies were discouraged. Nay, they had to be condemned as subversive. With this as the pervasive factor in the grand design of conquering a people, the pattern of education, consciously or unconsciously, fostered and established certain attitudes on the part of the governed. These attitudes conformed to the purposes of American occupation.

An Uprooted Race
The first and perhaps the master stroke in the plan to use education as an instrument of colonial policy was the decision to use English as the medium of instruction. English became the wedge that separated the Filipinos from their past and later to separate educated Filipinos from the masses of their countrymen. English introduced the Filipinos to a strange, new world.

With American textbooks, Filipinos started learning not only a new language but also a new way of life, alien to their traditions and yet a caricature of their model. This was the beginning of their education. At the same time, it was the beginning of their mis-education, for they learned no longer as Filipinos but as colonials.

They had to be disoriented form their nationalist goals because they had to become good colonials. The ideal colonial was the carbon copy of his conqueror, the conformist follower of the new dispensation. He had to forget his past and unlearn the nationalist virtues in order to live peacefully, if not comfortably, under the colonial order. The new Filipino generation learned of the lives of American heroes, sang American songs, and dreamt of snow and Santa Claus.

The nationalist resistance leaders exemplified by Sakay were regarded as brigands and outlaws. The lives of Philippine heroes were taught but their nationalist teachings were glossed over. Spain was the villain, America was the savior. To this day, our histories still gloss over the atrocities committed by American occupation troops such as the "water cure" and the "reconcentration camps." Truly, a genuinely Filipino education could not have been devised within the new framework, for to draw from the wellsprings of the Filipino ethos would only have lead to a distinct Philippine identity with interests at variance with that of the ruling power.

Thus, the Filipino past which had already been quite obliterated by three centuries of Spanish tyranny did not enjoy a revival under American colonialism. On the contrary, the history of our ancestors was taken up as if they were strange and foreign peoples who settled in these shores, with whom we had the most tenuous of ties. We read about them as if we were tourists in a foreign land.

Economic Attitudes
Control of the economic life of a colony is basic to colonial control. Some imperial nations do it harshly but the United States could be cited for the subtlety and uniqueness of its approach. For example, free trade was offered as a generous gift of American altruism. Concomitantly, the educational policy had to support his view and to soften the effects of the slowly tightening noose around the necks of the Filipinos. The economic motivations of the American in coming to the Philippines were not at all admitted to the Filipinos. As a matter of fact, from the first school days under the soldier-teachers to the present, Philippine history books have portrayed America as a benevolent nation who came here only to save us from Spain and to spread amongst us the boons of liberty and democracy. The almost complete lack of understanding at present of those economic motivations and of the presence of American interests in the Philippines are the most eloquent testimony to the success of the education for colonials which we have undergone.

What economic attitudes were fostered by American education? It is interesting to note that during the times that the school attempts to inculcate an appreciation for things Philippine, the picture that is presented for the child's admiration is an idealized picture of a rural Philippines, as pretty and as unreal as an Amorsolo painting with its carabao, its smiling healthy farmer, the winsome barrio lass in the bright clean patadyong, and the sweet nipa hut. That is the portrait of the Filipino that our education leaves in the minds of the young and it hurts in two ways.

First, it strengthens the belief (and we see this in adults) that the Philippines is essentially meant to be an agricultural country and we can not and should not change that. The result is an apathy toward industrialization. It is an idea they have not met in school. There is further, a fear, born out of that early stereotype of this country as an agricultural heaven, that industrialization is not good for us, that our national environment is not suited for an industrial economy, and that it will only bring social evils which will destroy the idyllic farm life.

Second, this idealized picture of farm life never emphasizes the poverty, the disease, the cultural vacuum, the sheer boredom, the superstition and ignorance of backward farm communities.

Those who pursue higher education think of the farm as quaint places, good for an occasional vacation. Their life is rooted in the big towns and cities and there is no interest in revamping rural life because there is no understanding of its economic problems. Interest is limited to aretsian wells and handicraft projects. Present efforts to uplift the conditions of the rural masses merely attack the peripheral problems without admitting the urgent need for basic agrarian reform.

With American education, the Filipinos were not only learning a new language; they were not only forgetting their own language; they were starting to become a new type of American. American ways were slowly being adopted. Our consumption habits were molded by the influx of cheap American goods that came in duty-free. The pastoral economy was extolled because this conformed with the colonial economy that was being fostered. Our books extolled the western nations as peopled by superior beings because they were capable of manufacturing things that we never thought we were capable of producing. We were pleased by the fact that our raw materials could pay for the American consumption goods that we had to import. Now we are used to these types of goods, and it is a habit we find hard to break, to the detriment of our own economy.

We never thought that we too could industrialize because in school we were taught that we were primarily an agricultural country by geographical location and by the innate potentiality of our people. We were one with our fellow Asians in believing that we were not cut out for an industrialized economy. That is why before the war, we looked down upon goods made in Japan despite the fact that Japan was already producing commodities at par with the West. We could never believe Japan, an Asian country, could attain the same superiority as America, Germany or England. And yet, it was "Made in Japan" airplanes, battleships and armaments that dislodged the Americans and the British from their positions of dominance during the Second World War.

This is the same attitude that has put us out of step with our Asian neighbors who already realize that colonialism has to be extirpated from their lives if they want to be free, prosperous, and happy.

Transplantation of Political Institutions
American education in effect transplanted American political institutions and ideas into the Philippines. Senator Recto, in his last major address at the University of the Philippines, explained the reason for this. Speaking of political parties, Recto said:

"...It is to be deplored that our major political parties were born and nurtured before we had attained the status of a free democracy. The result was that they have come to be caricatures of their foreign model with its known characteristics --patronage, division of spoils, political bossism, partisan treatment of vital national issues. I say caricatures because of their chronic shortsightedness respecting those ultimate objectives the attainment of which was essential to a true and lasting national independence. All throughout the period of American colonization, they allowed themselves to become more and more the tools of colonial rule and less and less the interpreters of the people's will and ideals."

Through their complacency, the new colonizer was able to fashion, in exchange for sufferance of oratorical plaints for independence, and for patronage, rank and sinecure, a regime of his own choosing, for his own aims, and in his own self-interest."

The Americans were confronted with the dilemma of transplanting their political institutions and yet luring the Filipinos into a state of captivity. It was understandable for American authorities to think that democracy can only mean the American type of democracy, and thus they foisted on the Filipinos the institutions that were valid for their own people. Indigenous institutions which could have led to the evolution of native democratic ideas and institutions were disregarded.

No wonder we too look with hostility upon countries who try to develop their own political institutions according to the needs of their people without being bound by western political procedures. We have been made to believe in certain political doctrines as absolute and the same for all peoples. An example of this is the belief in the freedom of the press. Here, the consensus is that we cannot nationalize the press because it would be depriving the foreigners of the exercise of the freedom of the press. This may be valid for strong countries like the United States where there is no threat of foreign domination, but certainly, this is dangerous for an emergent nation like the Philippines where foreign control has yet to be weakened.

Re-examination Demanded
The new demands for economic emancipation and the assertion of our political sovereignty leave our educators no other choice but to re-examine their philosophy, their values, and their general approach to the making of the Filipino who will institute, support and preserve the nationalist aims. To persist in the continuance of a system which was born under the exigencies of colonial rule, to be timid in the face of traditional opposition would only result in the evolution of an anomalous educational system which lags behind the urgent economic and political changes that the nation is experiencing.

What then are the nationalist tasks for Philippine education? Education must both be seen not as an acquisition of information but as the making of man so that he may function most effectively and and usefully within his own society. Therefore, education can not be divorced from the society of a definite country at a definite time. It is a fallacy to think that educational goals should be the same everywhere and that therefore what goes into the making of a well-educated American is the same as what should go into the making of the well-educated Filipino. This would be true only if the two societies were at the same ploitical, cultural, annd economic level and had the same political, cultural and economic goals.

But what happened in this country? Not only do we imitate Western education, we have patterned our education after the most technologically advanced western nations. The gap between the two societies is very large. In fact, they are two entirely different societies with different goals.

Adoption of Western values
Economically, the US is an industrial nation. It is a fully developed nation, economically speaking. Our country has a colonial economy with a tiny industrial base -in other words, we are backward and underdeveloped. Politically, the U.S. is not only master of its own house; its control and influence extends to many other countries all over the world. The Philippines has only lately emerged from formal colonial status and it still must complete its political and economic independence.

Culturally, the U.S. has a vigorously and distinctively American culture. It is a nation whose cultural institutions have developed freely, indigenously without control and direction from foreign sources, whose ties to its cultural past are clear and proudly celebrated because no foreign power has imposed upon its people a wholesale inferiority complex, because no foreign culture has been superimposed upon it destroying, distorting, its own past and alienating the people from their own cultural heritage.

What are the characteristics of America today which spring from its economic, political and cultural status? What should be the characteristics of our own education as dictated by our own economic, political and cultural conditions? To contrast both is to realize how inimical to our best interests and progress is our adoption of some of the basic characteristics and values of American education.

By virtue of its leadership and its economic interests in many parts of the world, the United States has an internationalist orientation based securely on a well-grounded, long held nationalistic viewpoint. U.S. education has no urgent need to stress the development of American nationalism in its young people. Economically, politically, culturally, the U.S. is the master of its own house. American education, therefore, understandably lays little emphasis on the kind of nationalism we Filipinos need.

Instead, it stresses internationalism and underplays nationalism. This sentiment is noble and good, but when it is inculcated in a people who have either forgotten nationalism or never imbibed it, it can cause untold harm. The emphasis is on universal brotherhood, on friendship for other nations, without the firm foundation of nationalism which would give our people the feeling of pride in our own products and vigilance over our natural resources, has had very harmful results. Chief among these is the transformation of our national virtue of hospitality into a stupid vice which hurts us and makes us the willing dupes of predatory foreigners.

UnFilipino Filipinos
Thus we complacently allow aliens to gain control of our economy. We are even proud of those who amass wealth in our country, publishing laudatory articles about their financial success. We love to hear foreigners call our country a paradise on earth, and we never stop to think that it is a paradise only for them but not for the millions of our countrymen. When some of our more intellectually emancipated countrymen spearhead moves for nationalism, for nationalization of this or that endeavor, do the majority of Filipinos support such moves? No, there is apathy because there is no nationalism in our hearts which will spur us to protect and help our countrymen first. Worse, some Filipinos will even worry about the sensibilities of foreigners lest they think ill of us for supposedly discriminating against them. And worst of all, many Filipinos will even oppose nationalistic legislation either because they have become the willing servants of foreign interests or because, in their distorted view, we Filipinos can not progress without the help of foreign capital and foreign entrepreneurs.

In this part of the world, we are well nigh unique in our generally non-nationalistic outlook. What is the source of this shameful characteristic of ours? One important source is surely the schools. There is little emphasis on nationalism. Patriotism has been taught us, yes, but in general terms of love of country, respect for the flag, appreciation for the beauty of our countryside, and other similarly innocuous manifestations of our nationality.

The pathetic results of this failure of Philippine education is a citizen amazingly naive and trusting in its relations with foreigners, devoid of the capacity to feel indignation even in the face of insults to the nation, ready to acquiesce and even to help aliens in the despoliation of our national wealth. Why are the great majority of our people so complaisant about foreign economic control? Much of the blame must be laid at the door of colonial education. Colonial education has not provided us with a realistic attitude toward other nations, especially Spain and the United States. The emphasis in our study of history has been on the great gifts that our conquerors have bestowed upon us. A mask of benevolence was used to hide the cruelties and deceit of early American occupation.

The noble sentiments expressed by McKinley were emphasized rather than the ulterior motives of conquest. The myth of friendship and special relations is even now continually invoked to camouflage the continuing iniquities in our relationship. Nurtured in this kind of education, the Filipino mind has come to regard centuries of colonial status as a grace from above rather than a scourge. Is it any wonder then that having regained our independence we have forgotten how to defend it? Is it any wonder that when leaders like Claro M. Recto try to teach us how to be free, the great majority of the people find it difficult to grasp those nationalistic principles that are the staple food of other Asian minds? The American architects of our colonial education labored shrewdly and well.

The Language Problem
The most vital problem that has plagued Philippine education has been the question of language. Today, experiments are still going on to find out whether it would be more effective to use the native language. This is indeed ridiculous since an individual can not be more at home in any other language than his own. In every sovereign country, the use of its own language in education is so natural no one thinks it could be otherwise.

But here, so great has been our disorientation caused by our colonial education that the use of our own language is a controversial issue, with more Filipinos against than in favor! Again, as in the economic field Filipinos believe they can not survive without America, so in education we believe no education can be true education unless it is based on proficiency in English.

Rizal already foresaw the tragic effects of a colonial education when, speaking through Simon, he said:

"...You ask for equal rights, the Hispanization of your customs, and you don't see that what you are begging for is suicide, the destruction of your nationality, the annihilation of your fatherland, the consecration of tyranny! What will you be in the future? A people without character. A nation without liberty - everything you have will be borrowed, even your very defects! ...What are you going to do with Castilian, the few of you who will speak it? Kill off your own originality, subordinate your thoughts to other brains, and instead of freeing yourselves, make yourselves slaves indeed! Nineteenths of those of you who pretend to be enlightened are renegades to your country! He among you who talks that language neglects his own in such a way that he neither writes it nor understands it, and how many have I not seen who pretended not to know a single word of it!.."

It is indeed unfortunate that teaching in the native language is given up to second grade only, and the question of whether beyond this it should be English or Filipino is still unsettled. Many of our educational experts have written on the language problem, but there is an apparent timidity on the part of these experts to come out openly for the urgent need of discarding the foreign language as the medium of instruction in spite of remarkable results shown by the use of the native language. Yet, the deleterious effects of using English as the medium of instruction are many and serious. What Rizal said about Spanish has been proven to be equally true for English.

Barrier to Democracy
Under the system maintained by Spain in the Philippines, educational opportunities were so limited that learning became the possession of a chosen few. This enlightened group was called the ilustrados. They constituted the elite. Most of them came from the wealthy class because this was the only class that could afford to send its sons abroad to pursue higher learning. Learning, therefore, became a badge of privilege. There was a wide gap between the ilustrados and the masses. Of course, many of the ilustrados led the propaganda movement, but they were mostly reformers who wanted reforms within the framework of Spanish colonialism. In a way, they were also captives of Spanish education. Many of them were the first to capitulate to the Americans, and the first leaders of the Filipinos during the early years of the American regime came from this class. Later they were supplanted by the products of American education.

One of the ostensible reason for imposing English as the medium of instruction was the fact that English was the language of democracy, that through this tongue the Filipinos would imbibe the American way of life which makes no distinction between rich and poor and which gives equal opportunities. Under this thesis, the existence of an ilustrado class would not long endure because all Filipinos would be enlightened and educated. There would be no privileged class. In the long run however, English perpetuated the existence of the ilustrados --American ilustrados who, like their counterparts, were strong supporters of the way of life of the new motherland.

Now we have a small group of men who can articulate their thoughts in English, a wider group who can read and speak in fairly comprehensible English and a great mass that hardly expresses itself in any language. All of these groups are hardly articulate in their native tongues because of the neglect of our native dialects, if not the deliberate attempts to prevent their growth.

The result is a leadership that fails to understand the needs of the masses because it is a leadership that can communicate with the masses only in general and vague terms. This is one reason why political leadership remains in a vacuum. This is the reason why issues are never fully discussed. This is the reason why orators with the best inflections, demagogues who rant and rave, are the ones who flourish in the political arena. English has created a barrier between the monopolists of power and the people. English has become a status symbol, while the native tongues are looked down upon. English has given rise to a bifurcated society of fairly educated men and the masses who are easily swayed by them. A clear evidence of the failure of English education is the fact that politicians address the masses in their dialects. Lacking mastery of the dialect, the politician merely deals in generalities. Because of their lack of command of English, the masses have gotten used to only half understanding what is said to them in English. They appreciate the sounds without knowing the sense. This is a barrier to democracy. People don't even think it is their duty to know, or that they are capable of understanding national problems. Because of the language barrier, therefore, they are content to leave everything to their leaders. This is one of the root causes of their apathy, their regionalism or parochialism. Thus, English which was supposedly envisioned as the language of democracy is in our country a barrier to the full flowering of democracy.

In 1924 the eminent scholar Najib Saleeby wrote on the language of education in the Philippines. He deplored the attempt to impose English as the medium of instruction. Saleeby, who was an expert on the Malayo-Polynesian languages, showed that Tagalog, Visayan, Ilocano, and other Philippine dialects belong to the same linguistic tree. He said:

"..The relation the Tagalog holds to the Bisaya or to the Sulu is very much like or closer than that of the Spanish to the Italian. An educated Tagalog from Batangas, and an educated Bisayan from Cebu can learn to understand each other in a short space of time and without much effort. A Cebu student living in Manila can acquire practical use and understanding of Tagalog in less than three months. The relation between Tagalog and Malay is very much the same as that of Spanish and French..."

This was said forty-two years ago when Tagalog movies, periodicals and radio programmes had not yet attained popularity that they enjoy today all over the country. Saleeby further states:

"...Empirically neither the Spanish nor the English could be a suitable medium for public instruction in the Philippine Islands. It does not seem possible that either of them can become the common or national language of the Archipelago. Three centuries of Spanish rule and education failed to check use of the vernacular. A very small minority of Filipinos could speak Spanish in 1898, but the great mass of the people could neither use nor understand it. Twenty-five years of intensive English education has produced no radical change. More people at present speak English than Spanish, but the great majority hold on to the local dialect. The Spanish policy might be partially justified on colonial and financial ground, but the American policy can not be so defended. It should receive popular free choice, or give good proof of its practicability by showing actual and satisfactory results. The people have as yet had no occasion to declare their free will, and the present policy must be judged on its own merits and on conclusive evidence... But teaching English broadcast and enforcing its official use is one thing, and its adoption as the basis of education and as the sole medium of public instruction is a completely different matter. This point can not be fully grasped or comprehended without special attention and experience in colonial education and administration. Such policy is exalted and ambitious to an extreme degree..

..It aims at something unknown before in human affairs. It is attempting to do what ancient Persia, Rome, Alexander the great and napoleon failed to accomplish. It aims at nothing less than the obliteration of the tribal differences of the Filipinos, the substitution of English for the vernacular dialects as a home tongue, and making English the national common language of the Archipelago."

That is more true today. Very few college students can speak except in mixed English and the dialect. Our congress has compounded their confusion by a completely unwarranted imposition of 24 units of Spanish.

Impediments to Thought
A foreign language is an impediment to instruction. Instead of learning directly through the native tongue, a child has first to master a foreign tongue, memorize its vocabulary, get accustomed to its sounds, intonations, accents, just to discard the language later when he is out of school. This does not mean that foreign language should not be taught. Foreign language should be taught and can be taught more easily after one has mastered his own tongue.

Even if the Americans were motivated by the sincere desire of unifying the country through the means of a common tongue, the abject results of instruction in English through the six decades of American education should have awakened our educators to the fact that the learning process has been disrupted by the imposition of a foreign language. From 1935, when the Institute of National Language was organized, very feeble attempts have been made to abandon the teaching of English. Our educators seem to constantly avoid the subject of language; in spite of the clear evidence of rampant ignorance among the products of the present educational system.

This has resulted in the denial of education to a vast number of children who after the primary grades no longer continue schooling. In spite of the fact that the national language today is understood all over the country, no one is brave enough to advocate its use as the medium of instruction. There are arguments about the dearth of materials in the national language, but these are feeble arguments that merely disguise the basic opposition of our educational leaders to the use of what is native. Thus the products of the Philippine educational system, barring very few exceptions, are Filipinos who do not have a mastery of English because it is foreign, and who do not have a mastery of their native tongue because of the deliberate neglect of those responsible for the education of the citizens of the nation.

A foreign tongue as a medium of instruction constitutes an impediment to learning and to thinking because a student first has to master new sounds, new inflections, and new sentence constructions. His innermost thoughts find difficulty of expression, and lack of expression in turn prevents the further development of thought. Thus we find in our society a deplorable lack of serious thinking among great sections of the population. We half understand books and periodicals written in English. We find it an ordeal to communicate with each other through a foreign medium, and yet we have so neglected our native language that we find ourselves at a loss expressing ourselves in this language.

Language is a tool of the thinking process. Through language, thought develops, and the development of thought leads to further development of language. But when a language becomes a barrier of thought, the thinking process is impeded or retarded and we have the resultant cultural stagnation. Creative thinking, analytical thinking, abstract thinking are not fostered because the foreign language makes the student prone to memorization. Because of the mechanical process of learning, he is able to get only a general idea but not a deeper understanding. So, the tendency of students is to study in order to be able to answer correctly and to pass the examinations and thereby earn the required credits. Independent thinking is smothered because the language of learning ceases to be the language of communication outside the classroom. A student is mainly concerned with the acquisition of information. He is seldom able to utilize this information for deepening his understanding of his society's problems.

Our Institute of National Language is practically neglected. It should be one of the main pillars of an independent country. Our educators are wary about proposing the immediate adoption of the national language as the medium of instruction because of what they consider as opposition of other language groups. This is indicative of our colonial mentality. Our educators do not see any opposition to the use of a foreign language but fear opposition to the use of the national language just because it is based on one of the main dialects. The fact that one can be understood in any part of the Philippines through the national language, the fact that periodicals in the national language and local movies have a mass following all over the islands, shows that, given the right support, the national language would take its proper place.

Language is the main problem, therefore. Experience has shown that children who are taught in their native tongue learn more easily and better than those taught in English. Records of the Bureau of Public Schools will support this. But mere teaching in the national language is not enough. There are other areas that demand immediate attention.

Philippine history must be rewritten from the point of view of the Filipino. Our economic problems must be presented in the light of nationalism and independence. These are only some of the problems that confront the nationalist approach to education. Government leadership and supervision is essential. Our educators need the support of legislators in this regard. In this connection, the private sector has also to be strictly supervised.

The Private Sector
Before the Second World War, products of the Philippine public school system looked down upon their counterparts in the private schools. It is generally accepted that graduates of the public schools at that time were superior to the products of the private institutions in point of learning.

There were exclusive private institutions but these were reserved for the well-to-do. These schools did not necessarily reflect superiority of instruction. But they reflected superiority of social status.

Among students of the public schools, there was still some manifestation of concern for national problems. Vestiges of the nationalistic tradition of our revolution remained in the consciousness of those parents who had been caught in the mainstream of the rebellion, and these were passed on to the young. On the other hand, apathy to the national problems was marked among the more affluent private school students whose families had readily accepted American rule.

Today, public schools are looked down upon. Only the poor send their children to these schools. Those who can afford it, or those who have social pretensions, send their children to private institutions. The result has been a boon to private education, a boon that unfortunately has seen the proliferation of diploma mills. There were two concomitant tendencies that went with this trend. First was the commercialization of education. A lowering of standards resulted because of the inadequate facilities of the public schools and the commercialization in the private sector. It is a well known fact that classes in many private schools are packed and teachers are overloaded in order to maximize profits. Second, some private schools which are owned and operated by foreigners and whose social science courses are handled by aliens flourished. While foreigners may not be anti-Filipino, they definitely can not be nationalistic in orientation. They think as foreigners and as private interests. Thus, the proliferation of private schools and the simultaneous deterioration of public schools have resulted not only in lower standards but also in a definitely un-Filipino education.

Some years ago, there was a move to grant curricular freedom to certain qualified private institutions as well as wider leeway for self-regulation. This was a retrograde step. It is true that this move was in answer to charges that state supervision would enhance regimentation. But in a country that is just awakening to nationalist endeavors, it is the duty of a nationalist administration to see to it that the moulding of minds is safely channeled along nationalist lines.

The autonomy of private institutions may be used to subvert nationalist sentiments especially when ownership of schools and handling of the social sciences are not yet Filipinized. Autonomy of private institutions would only dilute nationalist sentiments either by foreign subversions or by commercialization.

Other educational media
While the basic defect in the educational system has been responsible for the lack of nationalist ideals, there are other media and facilities that negate whatever gains are made in some sectors of the educational field. The almost unilateral source of news, films and other cultural materials tends to distort our perspective. American films and comics, American press services, fellowships in America, have all contributed to the almost total Americanization of our attitudes.

A distinct Filipino culture can not prevail if an avalanche of western cultural materials suffocates our relatively puny efforts in this direction.

Needed: Filipinos
The education of the Filipino must be a Filipino education. It must be based on the needs of the nation and the goals of the nation. The object is not merely to produce men and women who can read and write or who can add and subtract. The primary object is to produce a citizenry that appreciates and is conscious of its nationhood and has national goals for the betterment of the community, and not an anarchic mass of people who know how to take care of themselves only.

Our students hear of Rizal and Bonifacio but are their teachings related to our present problems or do they merely learn of anecdotes and incidents that prove interesting to the child's imagination?

We have learned to use American criteria for our problems and we look at our prehistory and our past with the eyes of a visitor. A lot of information is learned but attitudes are not developed. The proper regards for things Philippine, the selfish concern over the national fate --these are not at all imbedded in the consciousness of students. Children and adolescents go to school to get a certificate or diploma. They try to learn facts but the patriotic attitude is not acquired because of too much emphasis on forms.

What should be the basic objective of education in the Philippines? Is it merely to produce men and women who can read and write? If this is the only purpose, then education is directionless.

Education should first of all assure national survival. No amount of economic and political policy can be successful if the educational programme does not imbue prospective citizens with the proper attitudes that will ensure the implementation of these goals and policies. Philippine educational policies should be geared to the making of Filipinos. These policies should see to it that schools produce men and women with minds and attitudes that are attuned to the needs of the country.

Under previous colonial regimes, education saw to it that the Filipino mind was subservient to that of the master. The foreign overlords were esteemed. We were not taught to view them objectively, seeing their virtues as well as their faults. This led out citizens to form a distorted opinion of the foreign masters and also of themselves. We must now think of ourselves, of our salvation, of our future. And unless we prepare the minds of the young for this endeavor, we shall always be a pathetic people with no definite goals and no assurance of preservation.

Originally written in 1959.
Weekly Graphic, 8 June 1966.
Renato Constantino. The Filipinos in the Philippines and Other Essays. Malaya Books, 1966), 39-65.

Transcribed by Mr. Bert M. Drona – The Filipino Mind (http://thefilipinomind.blogspot.com)

thoughts after window shopping and futsal

2010-07-30T00:30:00.006+08:00

I ate a wholemeal vegetarian pizza from Breadtalk about an hour before training and it boded well for me. That’s why I didn’t feel too tired during futsal today, even though we were playing on and off for four hours. I even sort of got into my groove and played one game – well, compared to my usual – fairly well (so I’d like to think). My teammates were great so it was cool that we were passing and progressing towards the opponents’ goal (this is not the usual scenario when I’m playing so pardon the giddiness associated with tonight’s experience). I don’t remember though if we did score.

I initially thought that eating that whole thing (it was around a foot long and about 3-4 inches wide) wouldn’t be good because I’d be so full. Surprisingly, it was helpful as a snack since my last meal was around 1pm with a measly (yeah, it was!) serving of rice and fish fillet that wasn’t artfully presented, the accompanying dip sort of making up for it. I didn’t get to eat snack earlier as I planned because well, I was much too engrossed window shopping. I was already planning to see what Saizen’s Trinoma branch has to offer, looking for the True Value outlet where it is situated, but along the way, I passed through National Bookstore. I saw one of Jamie Oliver’s books from the display window about how anybody can cook so I went in to see that book. Unfortunately, I caught sight of the bestseller pile and the young adult and kids’ section behind it. There was something about Carlos Ruiz Zafon’s new book, after The Shadow of the Wind and one other, but it was nowhere near where the promotional material says so. I also saw a sort of biographical comics about different famous celebrities such as Elvis and The Beatles. The Beatles was the only one whose pages I peeked at. There was more text than speech/thought bubbles. The art – hmmm, unremarkable. I think the writers/publishers could’ve done better and not just sort of belittled each of the members’ attempts at going solo, limiting a child’s view about what caused the Beatles’ eventual breakup. I didn’t read everything, just that one part, so this judgment is not for the whole book. There was also a picture book of Alice in Wonderland featuring scenes from the Tim Burton movie. I wandered through the cooking section and saw a memoir of two Café by the Ruins kids. I’ve only heard of this place and it’s located up in Baguio. Two of the kids who grew up there were talking about their memories and they also had recipes of favorite treats. I wandered through the fiction section and found an open copy of Murakami’s A Wild Sheep Chase. Interesting read. I guess that’ll be the next Murakami I’ll buy.

A night in Bulacan

2010-07-25T21:22:00.008+08:00

It is possible to be thinking about two different things at the same time. I know I was doing it awhile ago while playing Dynomite. I was determining where to hit each egg given me to reduce the descending mass that threatens my game life. Then out of nowhere, my musings about what happened yesterday and events related to it were trickling in one by one. Now that’s multitasking.

Yesterday, my former SFC workmates and I had a dinner date at Guilbert’s in Plaridel, Bulacan. This came about because of a random thought one July evening as I was eating exorbitantly-costing (but it was somebody’s treat, so no reason for me to complain really) nachos with very little cheese sauce, some ground beef and tomatoes at a place called Homer’s as my companions and I whiled away the time before the 2:30 am live telecast of the semifinal matchup between Deutschland and España. In comparison to Homer’s, Guilbert’s taco salad has more nachos, lots of cheese (grated, covering the top of the nacho pile), with cabbage, beef and tomatoes completing the package and we (like four of us) could fill our stomachs with it and feel a bit full afterwards. And for half the price of Homer’s. So that random thought was tweeted and posted to facebook as a status message. And when one of my ex-workmates, Mayette, liked it, I commented that we should eat there next time. And so last night was the set date.

Last night was my fourth time there. For a Saturday night, it didn’t seem all that busy. I even thought we would be waiting a long time for our orders, but as it turns out, it was quite a slow night. We ordered the taco salad right away. It was served almost immediately and we promptly dug in. Somehow, it didn’t seem to be as much as how I imagined it before. And nobody commented that he/she was already quite full – probably because it was already around 8 and we were all positively hungry. I wanted to try the Sizzling Balut (recommended by many) this time, but nobody was keen to second that choice. So we had Tuna Bicol Express (which didn’t taste much like tuna, and it wasn’t so spicy or whitish as well), Laing (served inside a buko shell – quite milky, unremarkable taste) and Kangkong sa Lechon (which really was lechon sa kangkong – there were literally very few pork skin pieces on top of the kangkong cooked in some brown sauce). This Guilbert’s trip is perhaps the least remarkable of all if we’re talking about the food. My previous forays here all ended up with me thinking there are more surprises here when I come back another time. I guess the crowning glory would be the Tanduay Ice which Mayette insisted everybody have for at least one round, making Jay-r forego the buko juice he initially ordered, but which he eventually had after that one round. Tanduay Ice is really nice tasting but with a kick. First had a taste of it in Feb 8 also in Bulacan, on my second to the last day at work.

The five of us former Unit C housemates and Mark were supposed to be eating and celebrating today. But unfortunately, Pam, the sosyalera (a realization c/o Jay-r that was a point of, well, mirth), is unavailable because she’s working the night shift that week. It would’ve been a triple celebration because she just celebrated her birthday on the 20th, Jay-r was celebrating his today, the 25th, and Mark just got his separation pay which amounts to quite a lot, now that I think about it, although no figures were mentioned. Pam and Jay-r are both still working at SFC while Mayette was transferred to the sister company TOFC. Mark resigned beginning May so he had one month to go. Then Ces had to resign a week after and I followed the following week. So much for resigning early. He was the last one to exit even though he had planned to resign way before the thought even crossed my or Ces's minds.

All throughout dinner, we were just talking about SFC/TOFC stuff since we can’t help it (and which actually constituted the majority of our topics), competence, kinds of leadership styles, spas, Pam, Enchanted Kingdom, work plans, future directions interspersed with laughter, bathroom breaks (I’ve had four trips there due to two bottles of Tanduay Ice, following the first round with another bottle as its effect wore off), drunken banter and downright silly questions (Jay-r (while Ces was feeling his upper back): Ayan o, diba masakit?).

We stayed there till it was near closing and somebody was already exhibiting signs of drunkenness - all the way through the jeepney ride back to Malolos and at 7-Eleven where we had coffee (my first time to see and try this – they had French Vanilla, Banana Frost(?) and Cappuccino at half the price of what was available in the usual coffee shops) before heading home. Jay-r turned 22 (although it wasn’t supposed to be until 3AM), and eventually the drunkenness wore off, and we were lucky to find a van bound for Cubao at the unholy hour of 1 AM in a place like Malolos. So us three girls were south-bound and I eventually alighted at Road 20 at around 1:30 AM. There were quite a number of street lights on, so I decided to just walk back to the house, foregoing a tricycle ride. It was fine because it was already quite cool and I can handle clumps of people along the way anytime by just ignoring them.

(I just realize as I'm about to post this that I've got no good ending in mind. hehe. That's why the need for parentheses.)

Wordle for July

2010-07-25T08:01:00.000+08:00

It's Wordle time.

There's no doubt that my last very wordy posts were related to Germany and the World Cup (and I'll no longer expound on it here, just read 'em! they're just below this post teehee). And well, there's the word time, but I doubt if it had anything remotely related to time as that abstract idea.

It's good to know that my friend Mars is still using this tool every once in a while. She saw it in my blog one time, and she kinda uses it in a more telling way since she writes quite regularly. Thus, the wordle functions like a visual overview of her state of mind for a certain period of time.

Now, thinking about it, this is quite related to the concept of radiant thinking and mind mapping. Although the wordle is not so much a map as just a collage of words most often used in a person's body of work, still, it is quite indicative of that person's thoughts. Of course, it wouldn't be as effective as when one uses the rules for mind mapping to know what the effect or impression of each word is on the person applying or creating the mind map. The mind map, when done correctly, creates and shows associations between the key words and subordinate ideas, and if the mind map is well executed, an image of the mindmap overview would also give you at first glance the focus or the general idea of what the mind map is about. For example, the words on a mind map about one's notes on a lecture on the heart may create an image of the heart.

meine deutsche Liebe bei der WM

2010-07-11T11:41:00.003+08:00

This should have been posted days ago. But the intermittent internet connection prevented me from doing just that. (And I do this for posterity's sake, mot so much for readership - but readers are welcome and encouraged to make comments).

July 6, 2010 | 7:30 am (yes, just woken up, in case you're wondering)

Caught up in World Cup fever. Wasn't able to watch many of the elimination games (only Spain-Chile, Brazil-Portugal, a little bit of Ivory Coast-Honduras) and so I wasn't able to see how Italy crashed out and how well Ghana and Germany performed to advance to the round of 16. Was rooting for Germany, Spain and Italy (before they horribly crashed out in the first round) besides Brazil. I've watched Spain hold off Chile and thwart Cristiano Ronaldo (though I haven't witnessed Villa's lone goal). Both Argentina and Germany, two strong teams based on their team standings and previous World Cup appearances, I haven't watched yet (in this or previous World Cups or international friendlies) before their quarterfinal spectacle. So I told myself I gotta watch them since one of them is bound to bow out after their matchup. And so I did get to watch at a friend's place. He also had other friends along which made it fun since there'll be (friendly) bickering between the supporters. And it's quite different when you're watching with people you're not entirely familiar with (as I found out the previous night when ate Chie, kuya Carl and I went to Podium to watch the Brazil-Netherlands match up for free and ended up eating Papa Dams and the home-brew iced tea at Arya's, a Persian restaurant which seemed to be the only one showing WC games in that area; we tried to find a cheaper place in the El Pueblo area to no avail.)

So there were chips and dinuguan with puto and beer, and I was simply excited. With Germany's 4-0 and 4-1 wins over Australia and England respectively, I felt sure they're gonna do great in this game. Argentina would have their own superb display since they've reached the quarterfinal stage of the match already, not to mention they've got Messi, the current holder of the FIFA World Player of the Year title.

So the match started, and suffice it to say, I wasn't disappointed as wave after wave of disappointment washed over our Argentina-supporting companions, moreso when the third and fourth goals finally crushed their hopes even with a spirited but belated Argentinian offense.

And now, I approach the upcoming semifinal match between Germany and Spain with a bit of apprehension. After watching that (Ger-Arg) game, I thought there's no stopping Germany. But I've seen how good Spain can be, and they could capitalize on their passing to defeat this young German side which can be at a prone to holes in their defense (as I've seen when I downloaded - yes, you got that right - their games against Australia and England and watched those games earlier today). Germany might not be so invincible after all. But as long as Schweinsteiger, Öezil, Podolski, Klose, Lahm, Friedrich, Mertesacker, Neuer, Khedira, Gomez and the rest keep their cool and do what they're supposed to do and eventually enjoy the game, I believe they'll very well lift the WC trophy this time instead of just being 3rd place four years ago.

Spain has plenty of superstars and I wished them well at the beginning, but I think I'll be heartbroken if Germany doesn't advance after this. Please Germany, go on and show the world what you can do.

Well, so it's been days since the semifinal. We know what happened. That octopus Paul in Germany proved his gastronomic predilections with Spain winning the chance to play in the finals at Soccer City at dawn (local time) on Monday - the playtimes (read: 2:30 AM) proving quite a challenge for most of us in the Philippines who are following the World Cup. I asked my friend if I could burrow up in her sala to witness the game live. The result didn't really come as a shock. I was being prepared for it minute by minute as the Germans led by coach Joachim Loew and captain Philipp Lahm let La Furia Roja control the pace of the game. With their near-impeccable passing, they had most of the possession in the first half. They weren't hurrying through their actions; in fact, the commentator remarked that there's not much haste in the game which was going at a walking pace even with 25 minutes into the game. There were a few spirited attacks in the first half, with the greatest chance of scoring attempted by Trochowski and which was successfully denied by Sans Iker. But the rest of their efforts didn't amount to anything. I don't know what happened but the German side didn't show enough aggressiveness, didn't chase after loose balls or clearing headers much, wasn't able to weave around the defense for counter attacks. They were much too timid for what I've been used to seeing them display. It seemed like they lost their self-confidence and forgot about having fun. It would just be a matter of time before Spain capitalizes on their possession and take that much-coveted spot on the world stage. And take advantage of it they did, as Carles Puyol, the indefatigable defender from FC Barcelona, headed in a most decisive goal from setpiece at the 73rd minute, and Germany was left scrambling to try to organize and at least equalize before the match ends.

The disappointment in the young squad was evident as Spain celebrated and the white-shirted players were discussing in the pitch, obviously scrutinizing what was wrong with their game. Bastian Schweinsteiger displayed an almost uncontrolled fury at the team's loss, and it was really a pity to see him, seeing as how he had coaxed the team and contributed to their previous victories. So it was that Germany will be in the third place play-off for two consecutive World Cups already, a feat achieved by Brazil and France decades ago.

Playing against Uruguay which had the likes of striker Diego Forlán, Cavani, Suarez who returns to play after being suspended in their previous match, and the persevering long-haired defender Martin Cáceres for 3rd place in the 2010 FIFA World Cup hosted by South Africa, the 11, and later, nine-numbered crowd at Outback restaurant in Libis hooted, despaired, celebrated, banged fists on the counter, and later on, celebrated with whoops, applause and picture-taking the Deutschland victory, one that was orchestrated without the likes of veterans Lahm, Neuer, Klose and Podolski, after a spectacular match yielding five goals, three from the black shirts and two from the blue shirts. Müller, coming back from his suspension at the last game opened up the scoring for Germany in the first half with a well-timed strike after Schweinsteiger's shot was blocked away and into his path by the Uruguayan keeper. Forlán managed to equalize a few minutes later. Things were fast-paced all throughout, and there were groans all around (since I think only one or two of our number was supporting the South Americans) as in the second half, Uruguay had a lead 2-1. But able winger Marcell Jansen, himself looking baby-faced, rallied Germany and its fans as he headed in a corner kick after the ball passed the keeper's ready hands to equalize. Khedira provided the winning shot with another header minutes later. A last minute foul by Germany ended up with a free kick for Uruguay which all the more made us nervous, since anything and everything can happen. Any chance will be duly snatched up, and the match may have to go on overtime, or even penalty shootouts. Thankfully, it didn't. The game ended after three minutes of added time. The relief, joy, the satisfaction was all worth it. Germany defended and attacked to the best of their abilities against the able passing and persevering defense of Uruguay. Each shot made by the blue shirts was a disappointment waiting to bombard us, each off-target or blocked shot or uncreative tactic by the German side a cause for cries of disappointments and bangs on the counter table. Each goal a cause for joy or for despair. Such is the beauty and nature of the World Cup, where things may happen at a split second, brought about by circumstances provided by split-second decisions.

And so we have almost come to an end. There is one last match before Filipino football fans finally bid away sleepless nights trying to follow the game live. Almost 31 days wrought with anticipation mixed with various emotions will be over in just a few hours, and the next meet of the 32 best nations of the world will be eagerly awaited as four years pass by. La Furia Roja meets the Oranje at Soccer City at 2:30 am again tomorrow. ¡Vamos España!

And to my beloved Germans, congratulations for a job well done! May Schweinsteiger, Özil, Podolski, Klose, Boateng, Cacau, Lahm, Müller, Friedrich, Mertesacker, Neuer, Butt, Kieβling, Trochowski, Kroos, Gomez and the rest of you jungen deutschen keep the spark alive and delight more fans for years to come.

P.S. I can be really obsessed by things I've come to love - I haven't written as spontaneously and as spirited as this for a long, long time. It's all because of football and die Mannschaft. Gehen wir Deutschland!

More La Tortura, SARS in China and the World Cup

2010-06-25T13:33:00.003+08:00

The Spanish-speaking people indeed speak fast. I'm having a hard time following Shakira's enunciation of the lines

No sólo de pan vive el hombre
Y no de excusas vivo yo

from her song La Tortura. Yep, that's my LSS for the past few days already and it's a song I just heard two days ago. Talk about obsession. And yes, those two lines are kinda like my favorites; they're the ones I sing too when it's time to sing them. I've almost memorized the first two lines of the song since I've played it many times these three days. I like the beat of the song, danceable, but still full of emotion from the vocals of Alejandro Sanz who's hot in an alternate version of the video for the song (unfortunately, my source has been taken down). I don't know why they just didn't use it for the official video release.

I love the concept, of the video, and even if you can't understand every bit or even a teeny tiny bit of Spanish in the song, you'll get an idea from watching the body language between the two. The video is just so sexy. Though I don't get why Shakira had to go smear black paint all over her body and go dancing. This video puts much more perspective into the story than the original version which uses the Shaketon remix. Okay, so we all know they're both hot in this video.

I already thought Shakira was amazing as a dancer in Hips Don't Lie, one of the very few videos I've watched of her, or in Beautiful Liar where she showcased those patented grinding belly moves. It seems it's been years since she's perfected them, since La Tortura was way back in 2005 (the years fly by so fast sometimes I no longer know where I've been all those times). Seeing her perform live is more amazing, she just does the whole thing without breaking a sweat, all the time showing the right expressions, and showing that she's enjoying everything that she's doing. I think there's something going on between her and Alejandro since they work perfectly onstage (well, in this performance particularly), or they may just be very good actors. More of Shakira in the Oral Fijacion Tour with none other than my new favorite Spanish male musician/singer (I just love how his voice soars as he sings Yo sé que no he sido un santo / Pero lo puedo arreglar, amor).

Listening to her has revived my drive to learn Spanish. I've downloaded a few of her songs, okay, almost a whole discography, and explored other current artists to brush up on Spanish.

This is part two of my La Tortura fixation. I wrote the first one only yesterday and you can read it here :D

+ + +

In between sneaking peaks at Shakira grinding her belly and admiring Alejandro Sanz as long as he's not dyed blond, I've managed to pick up China Syndrome by Karl Taro Greenfeld and continue reading where I left off. This hardbound book was a steal, having bought it atNational Bookstore in Shangri-la Mall for only Php200.00. The former Time Asia editor chronicles the beginnings and eventual spread of SARS back in late 2002. I'm not yet halfway through the book, but the retelling of the events as they unfold do make me shiver. The disease probably didn't mean much to me back then, although a few of our countrymen were affected by this disease. But it was far from reality to me since I wasn't exposed to the disease firsthand nor secondhand. Greenfeld talks about the people who have been infected, what their lives were, how China was at that time, the economic boom and how everybody wanted to be a part of it, Hong Kong and its team of medical professionals who sought to keep its poultry supply disease-free, the different specialists in different Chinese hospitals, the information hierarchy in pseudo-Communist China and why no information regarding the disease was disseminated to help control it. SARS was still unidentified in the part I'm reading, but it has already gone into a hospital and community outbreak.

The attitude of the Chinese government towards possible outbreaks is horrible to say the least. Anything that would damage the image of order, prosperity and peace that they've been trying to maintain at the expense of hundreds or thousands of lives shouldn't be reported. They'll remain as rumors; the only useful information will be known at the top. There's hardly information going down the hierarchy. And since the local doctors and hospital directors don't want to be the receiving end of reprimands front heir higher-ups, they just go about their own without reporting alarming things such as what's been happening to immunohealthy thirty-something year olds who suddenly develop fevers, difficulty in breathing and spots in the lungs. Even the press has been barred from publishing anything about it for a time, and Hong Kong which is just south of Guangdong where the disease started has been left clueless (the one nation, two systems policy failed at this).

I'm quite excited to read this through the end, as long as I get myself extricated from the computer for a reasonable enough amount of time. I'm quite curious whether the Chinese government has changed from then, and how they managed the AH1N1 influenza outbreak, which if I haven't forgotten also started somewhere in China.

All of a sudden, I feel like we're all so vulnerable, especially those who live in the cities with its polluted air and close, cramped spaces. At least there's no winter here to promote communicable diseases such as the flu, but then we have our own problems when the rainy days come.

So now I've said my bit. Glad to be writing again. Hopefully tomorrow again.

postscript...
- Italy lost 2-3 to Slovakia. What happened my dear Italians, 2006 World Cup champions? Not even advancing to the Round of 16, and doing too little too late, finishing last in what seemed to be the weakest group of the tournament. But yay! Germany and Spain have advanced, and so has Brazil. Hooray also for Korea Republic (South Korea), the first Asian team to qualify. Korea DPR has performed well, even though this is their first World Cup. Even though you were trashed by Portugal, still kudos to North Korea and its players. France... well, there's been lots of analyses. I guess attitude begets bad fortune. I wonder though how Japan is doing. Do they have any chance? South Africa seems to be roaring. Hooray for the hosts and the vuvuzela! Although I could do away with that while watching. I wonder when I can watch the next match. Hmm, alright till next time guys. Football later.

the original "reading Dramione fics"

2010-06-24T15:00:00.002+08:00

- okay, this I found just now. Apparently, it's stored somewhere, but the navigation of ScribeFire isn't so easy to use. For sure there wasn't anywhere here that says Draft is Auto-saved.

Before the intended topic, I'd like to say that I am liking blogger's new designs. Of course, they're all two-column-oriented. And previewing any of them on my blog shows them incorporating all of the stuff on my two current sidebars, so it wouldn't be such a hassle to switch to any of those. I might try it sometime, seeing as I'm kinda bored with my all-white Georgia typefaced theme, although I don't think I'm ready to give up the three-column orientation of my current. Anyhoo....

I was preoccupied with Dramione fics the whole of yesterday, resulting in me failing to go out and get a cedula (to finally claim my final and separation pay). I wasn't able to do anything else yesterday, except stay in front of the pc from around 9am to 7 in the evening. Not a very nice way to spend the day, especially since.... But after that, I promise, and I do promise it, to start budgeting my time.

For the uninitiated who might ask, Dramione (a term which I discovered two days ago) refers to a writers preference for a relationship between the HP characters Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger (DMHG, so to speak - which could also be written as DM/HG or DMxHG). This is the world of fanfiction, so the writer has free reign over what s/he'd like to happen in her/his story. (This is why there are slash as in male/male pairings like DracoHarry, or RuHana, SenRu, MitRu in the anime Slam Dunk - I bet you'll know right away who are the components of the SD couples that I'm talking about *grin*) S/he could also put the characters in an alternate universe (AU) but still retain their old characters.

So why Dramione fics? I tried reading one of these a few years ago. It's really refreshing to read stories where what you know isn't the fact in the story that you're reading. Cleverly manipulating the plot so that although Draco retains his evil/villainous character at the beginning of the story, emotions, circumstances and I guess, the whole world conspire to bring about a common understanding between Draco and Hermione, two characters who have much hatred for each other, and result in a romantic relationship between the two. There are the initial word wars, sometimes physical fights, while prolonged encounters in each other bring out each other's humanity since it could be really tiring to be bickering all the day that you're with each other. Then tell-tale emotions creep up, sometimes acknowledged, but most of the time ignored for no logical explanation manifests itself in the minds of the characters. Then there could still be denial, logical thinking over why a certain relationship shouldn't happen, then if you're not reading a tragedy, possibly a happy ending where the two characters live happily ever after.

The first fic I read before was skillful in making me believe the events happening in the story. Unfortunately, I didn't follow it to its completion since it has long been left at some point midway of the story at the time that I was reading it. I don't think I've read others after it. Then a bit of watching at YouTube - from Shakira's videos for Gypsy, which featured Rafael Nadal, and La Tortura, to a vuvuzela-inspired (it's cool how this buzzing South African instrument has made waves, dividing the world into supporters and dissers) The Fellowship of the Ring video (watch it by searching for Gandalf goes to the World Cup) and then fan vids of first, Snape, and then SnapeHermione (if you're curious, watch the one where they used T.A.T.U.'s All The Things She Said - I think it's one of the nicer ones). I also did try looking into a few DracoHarry vids, but of course, they're all slideshows of manipulated pics/fan arts. And then I remembered that DracoHermione fic from before so I went to my old haunt fanfiction.net and searched for ones that would satisfy me. I found Forbidden Fruit, one of the better multi-chapter fics by petitesorciere.

-- Here is where I branch out to my main topic (and the point at which I accidentally clicked on Clear Field). The rest of what I have to say can be read here. Thanks for bearing with me.

--- Can I just say, ScribeFire for Firefox is better than that for Chrome's because it has an Insert Symbol command, making it easier to input accented letters and other symbols one's writing might require. Of course, I can't tell if accented letters are present when the language you use for your blogging service is European, like Spanish or German. But still, more intuitiveness needed for ScribeFire (like the case awhile ago, where I thought I've lost my whole draft.

Baguio trip Tabblo

2010-06-24T13:12:00.000+08:00

Sharing with you guys a collage of a day spent in Baguio. I'm using Tabblo to present this collage of pictures so follow the link and leave a comment or join Tabblo too and experiment with its features.

Going to Baguio this time, I am more aware of what I see. The beauty of the city in its gardens and parks, in the woodwork borne of our Ifugao brothers, in the temerity of this mountain city - all testament to the enduring charm and activity that is Baguio. ... See my Tabblo>

reading Dramione

2010-06-24T13:03:00.002+08:00

OMG! I just accidentally hit the Clear field button on ScribeFire, and the Undo button won't bring what I've typed back... Aaaarrrrggggghhhh....

And of course, I can't possibly recall all of them, although I could if I tried, but that's around three paragraphs, with a number of many-worded thoughts in parentheses. So much for the usability of ScribeFire when the Undo command doesn't Unclear the frickin' field. I don't think there's a Draft Auto-save like in the web-based blogging tools. So now I'm no longer inspired to write. And I was on the verge of expounding on my topic: Dramione fics. I was going to feature two in this post. Check it out, if you're fond of this ship, or if you're curious as to how Draco Malfoy and Hermione could possibly get along in the HP universe, and possibly end up kissing each other and maintaing an interesting, albeit, challenging relationship. *Sigh*

Really, a big big sigh. Darn...

From my old haunt fanfiction.net, there's Forbidden Fruit, still unfinished but one of the better ones by author petitesorciere. At Charms class, Draco and Hermione are inadvertently paired up to charm an apple to make the eater keep on eating it. Bickering between the two leads to a match for supremacy on who can do the charm, which backfires. They each took a bite of the apple and found their bodies drawn to each other. Seduction becomes easy from then on. Almost every chapter features intimate scenes between the two, and if that's not your thing, then I suggest you read the other one, already completed with a sequel already in the writing stages.

An Aversion to Change which is more of a tragedy by Mel88 is post Half-Blood Prince. Draco is seemingly disowned by his father after his failure to kill the headmaster. The Golden Trio (as Harry, Ron and Hermione are called in the other fics I've read) are active in the Order of the Phoenix. Draco takes up on Dumbledore's offer to go to the headquarters of the Order of the Phoneix so he settles into 12 Grimmauld Place on the summer before school, but ignored by the others, although he's still his smug self looking to fight or irritate any of his schoolmates. Ron and Hermione, who is made Head Girl, go back to school while Harry looks for the Horcruxes, and Draco is made Head Boy. I'm not sure if it's anywhere in the books that the Head Boy and Girl share a dormitory but here (and in the other fanfics) they do. Draco, having earned the ire of his former Slytherin posse Zabini, Crabbe and Goyle is assaulted by the three. He's alone in Hogwarts, with no professor nor housemates to support him. Although here, he's portrayed like Harry when it comes to Quidditch - there's nothing in Hogwarts he'd rather than fly on his broom and play the broom equivalent of football. A talented flier (unlike his character in the books wherein Harry often tricks him in crashing to the ground whenever he feigns a dive, here it's Draco doing that to Ginny, the new Gryffiindor seeker), an able captain, brimming with confidence, and a hot body, and who gets nicer and nicer to Hermione as the story progresses, especially when Hermione is in the same boat as him for protecting him from Ron and the others, well, we know what happens. But tragedy, oh, sweet tragedy... He still loves Hermione, but there's still something more important to him than his love. And the last scene is just heartbreaking. Amazing, just amazing work. But if you don't like this ending, preferring a happier one, check out the Alternate Ending to An Aversion to Change. Find it in the author's list of stories.

internet/power fail

2010-06-11T14:30:00.000+08:00

A few things not going my way today (even blogger's rich text editor takes some seconds before I can start typing. And what do you know, there's nothing like frustration of this sort to get me writing).

First, I was booking a Cebu Pacific flight to Kalibo on January. I've managed to score free accommodation care of my friend. I've just entered the payment details and voila! The screen flickers to black, the electric fan stops spinning, and just as soon as I realize what happened, the CPU goes beep, the red light on the AVR and the CPU goes on and the electric fan resumes its normal whirring. If I could've finished the whole thing a few seconds earlier, the booking might've been done before the power had the temerity to trip right at that moment. Yeah, I know. Chill, as some would say. But I wouldn't be this pissed if it didn't take as long as 30 minutes to book these flights (it may even have taken more).

Oh well, starting over again... Hopefully all goes well this time.

Hmmm....

Well, I guess that's just the whole of it. I've started to feel better after the prospect of going to Bora presented itself to me. Brought me back to my old, usual self. Not this skulking, moping, passive self that's been manifesting since yesterday. And I'm reminded (as I am time and again) what the choice of laziness, the decision to procrastinate, does to one's entire outlook, affecting one's actions and future, no matter how you think it's only the now that you're making a decision about.

creation, etc.

2010-05-10T22:03:00.000+08:00

I remember watching School of Rock a week ago. I realize now that since singing acts on movies and shows like Glee tend to become popular, Jack Black and his band could’ve sang more songs showcasing their prowess and endearing themselves more to the viewers. (Of course, I don’t think it would work if they make a sequel with the kids more grown up since we can’t help but compare them to who they were as kids. The treatment should be just right - not trying too hard, just the right pace, nothing over-emotional or over the top so that it would work well.) There could've been more songs that performed and more songs for people like me to download because it’s such a joy to create something, music being one of them. Even though it’s fictional, to realize for one moment that here is something that you’ve created with your own hands, the product of efforts arising from a thinking process which is what came out of the collective experiences and thoughts that become you is an amazing, incredible act of humanity. Being imbued with this ability is a blessing, it would be a shame to not exercise this activity and let all those creative streams of thought go to waste. Just think if Beethoven, the Beatles, Pink Floyd, the Eraserheads, Salvador Dali, Ansel Adams, Dickens, Tolkien, LeGuin weren’t around - I can’t begin to imagine a world bereft of any art. Celebrate humanity, celebrate creation, celebrate art.

# # #

I was supposed to repost an image from quote-book on tumblr yesterday, but the repost thing failed, and when I tried to look for it today, I couldn’t find it. The image recounts the experiences of someone remembering a relationship – how time suddenly becomes just divided in two – the time with that person, and the time before or after. Like how the scent of something brings back that person back to the time when she was still enjoying her time with that person, and the time when that person is no longer being exposed to that scent is synonymous with the time they were already apart. So well, there’s the me given to romantic tendencies… Even for just once, I'd like to experience emo shit like the one you can conjure in the quote on that image ... just so I could add it up to my belt of experiences. Who knows how many love stories I’ve concocted starring myself. I would like to add a realistic twist to my stories so I was hoping to experience one myself.

Dedicated to the last-minute, undecided, yet thinking Filipina voter: MAKE YOUR VOTE COUNT!

2010-04-12T13:08:00.001+08:00

reposted from: http://gangcentral.wordpress.com/2010/04/10/dedicated-to-the-last-minute-undecided-yet-thinking-filipina-voter/

MAKE YOUR VOTE COUNT!
By Gang Badoy

As we shake that tacky campaign jingle from our wits we realize that May 10 draws near. Unless the administration pulls out a 5th ace from its deck of cards, our future is decided by the end of May. Here’s a cheat sheet for you women out there—the last-minute, undecided, yet thinking voter.

We hope you’ve got your short-list. Unfortunately for us Filipinos, this political race track is full—all lanes have hoofmarks dug deep from start to finish, save for one horse. Kilusang Bagong Lipunan’s (KBL) standard bearer, Vetellano Acosta was disqualified sometime early March. Many of us only heard of him when news of the Commission on Elections (COMELEC) giving him the boot hit the six o’clock news. Acosta walked away from the oval right when his recognition rate was at its peak. Imagine that. In any case, we are still left with eight horses to bet on and the last lap has just begun.

Let’s start with certain truths about us. My trusted friend, writer, publisher and sometimes political pundit Erwin Romulo summarized his experience, “Men tend to stick to what they know while women are more open to seeing what a candidate is—just as in dating. Guys tend to go with what they know and will change only if something drastic convinces them otherwise.” Not comfortable with just one observation, I asked Reproductive Health Advocacy Network honcho Elizabeth Angsioco to balance out the gender opinion. “I think that women also look into the candidates’ ‘softer’ side, like how they treat people,” says Angsioco. “We’ve dropped one senatorial candidate because of first-hand reports regarding this. Questions like ‘Are they perceived as caring persons?’ come up. This is also in relation to their partners, children, mothers, siblings. In short, women, beyond looking at macro issues, qualifications and track record, also consider ‘soft issues’ in making their choices.”

Knowing this, we proceed:

five things to remember before voting:

1) Know that a vote is not hereditary.

Our first step is to do away with our ‘inherited politics’—the politics of our parents. Yes, the color of our hair and eyes are genetic skips from our parents but sometimes so are our political hues. This doesn’t mean to say that in the end we can’t share the same shade of green, yellow, orange or blue as them—we can! It’s just as important that we know that it is truly ours. And if we have to hide a certain colored batch of T-shirts when we go to Sunday lunch until we have decided, then so be it. Given that our country has a rather psychedelic set up of political parties, this first step could also be determined as irrelevant.

If your eyes were even half-open throughout the last six years you pretty much dismiss party affiliations all together. The important thing and I cannot say this enough—It has to be truly your call. It is, after all, your vote.

2) Figure out your fears.

More often than not fear is a good fuel for action. In fact, if you wrote down your biggest fears for the country—the first three items on the list would possibly contain your life’s advocacy and mission. More often than not, sifting through your nightmares determines what’s important to you because you will gravitate towards things and activities that will assuage these. Are you most horrified by hunger, poverty, gender inequality, preventable diseases, miseducation of the next generation, global warming, war? Which one is it? Once you’ve answered this, you are now in the ante-room to the cavernous chamber we loosely call “policies.” Ah, see? It is not that complex after all.

3) Differentiate principles from policies.

Obviously a spin-off from item #2, we have to decide now which we prioritize. Closely observing candidates can be a complex activity. Reporters research for us and we read them. The complexity of the news item compared to the simplicity of the TV ad or the catchiness of his/her campaign jingle spins before us. Since ads are created to transmit clearly into the minds of the average audience there is a tendency for us to reach out and grab what is simpler to understand. And yes, it is the method of the ad agency that grabs our attention more than the convoluted research of the investigative journalist. Now, it is possible to give in to sloth. When we are on lazy gear, we naturally cross over to the principles we already understand. To paraphrase an article I read a long time ago: What does “budget deficit” mean? I don’t exactly know. What does “adultery” mean? I know! Therefore virtues can replace politics, with voters leaning onto the simpler question of principles rather than the harder question of policy. The ideal is a balance of both but since we are aware that none of our horses in this May 2010 race is perfect—then it is time we decide which gets the premium ribbon from us. Know the difference between these judgment approaches and acknowledge which one is your priority. Set your own criterion! Then you are ready for item #4.

4) Do not be flotsam to survey tides.

We try to watch and listen during the so-called debates with its time-limitations and network steered biases and come out as befuddled as the unintelligent aspirant. Then worse—we wait for the instant end-of-debate polls telling us which candidate “won.” Though it is true that this poll can be included in a wider more thorough statistic, it tends to make us lazy. These trends and surveys merely assign the decision to others and it can possibly become our bottom line for voting. And yes, this is where we hear the familiar, “I’d vote for candidate X but since he’s so low on the surveys I’ll just vote for Y because I don’t want Z to win.” You’ve either said this yourself or heard it from your most analytical friend. There is nothing I can do if this is the route you’ve decided to take. I am in no position to say it is wrong or right because your choice to vote for second choice, candidate “Y” can possibly be just a firm result of item #2, right? (repeat after me, “Figure out your fears.”)

5) Have a little faith in the science.

Do not mistake the campaign for the presidency. History can remind us that managing a great campaign has very little to do with being a great president. Unfortunately the campaign period does not include a simulation of events and tasks designed to test the candidate’s abilities. There are no try-outs for the presidency, no auditions, no semi-finals, no Top Five. They don’t get to play The Sims-Nation and present their scores to us. Obviously election day is not a time for magic from all sides. If it is honest, elections are as exact as math or science. Election is a form of intelligent prediction based on facts, backed up by knowing personal and professional histories of a candidate and fortifying a choice with numbers and support. In the end, there is still a gamble, don’t you think? The risks are just reduced in proportion to our knowledge of the aspirant and his entourage. In a way we think before we vote because when we cast that ballot it is almost predicting a better-run nation under the leadership of our “chosen one.” So…if you have a little faith left in you, then vote for your choice and then cross out item #4 because you should never be flotsam to anyone or anything’s tides but yours.

The goal is to someday vote with faith in the system, our gut and analyses. There’s a science to this, I know it. I have a confession to make, I still feel uncertain about my personal voting method until today (the audacity to even write this piece!)—but I have resolved to keep working on it constantly even through the next six years. I have to make sure that I have this down pat in time for May 2016. (ends)

Author’s note:
This article was first published in Women's Health Philippines, April 2010 issue.
Now if only writing for Women’s Health can count for calories burnt and muscles built. -GBC

...

2010-03-28T09:24:00.002+08:00

So many things I want to give life to, to think about, yet there is very little time...

work thoughts and then some

2010-01-17T23:49:00.000+08:00

It's only been two weeks but I feel like I've been there a long time. Two weeks is enough to get used to the environment, the living conditions, especially if you have almost the same routine six days a week, 13-14 hours a day. I'm still quite lucky to have Sundays off. But once I do the regular stuff my co-staffers do, I won't be as lucky. Hopefully with the lean season (which won't be anytime soon, since Valentine's is coming up), most Sundays would be rest days. Since we're getting ready for that season of profit ('course!), pink, red chocolate trials and actual finished products (e.g. chocolate blocks) will abound, plus heart-shaped ones. There really is something about love that makes everybody spend so much time thinking what to buy and what to do and a lot of money to commemorate the day.

The setting is quite different from Quezon City, and even back in the province where we reside (in the same old city of Dagupan). Here, as I walk to work, I see green fields stretching out. I've never stayed in such a place before where agricultural crops are being grown on a large scale near where I am. The sky is visible, since there aren't many tall buildings where I am, although I hardly see it during the day since I am mostly indoors. I like the greenness of the fields. Reminds me of UP during rainy days, where the moisture makes everything so vivid.

Of course, there are certain drawbacks to this kind of job. But I'm done accepting the whole deal as soon as the new year started. Which is why I wasn't able to do much thinking about this coming year since I was anticipating this new direction in my life: getting a permanent job in my field. There are so many things to learn. Even with the almost 144 hours I've spent in the office, I'm still nowhere close to knowing those things which would enable me to work smoothly and efficiently. Right now, I'm still gathering a lot of information. Nothing beats hands-on experience, but first I gotta understand the different processes and mechanisms in place. If only getting the information was easier. I do understand - everything's part of the learning process. So here's to more learning. I just hope to keep in mind Neil Gaiman's benediction for the new year, and which I have written in my planner as soon as I found the whole thing again awhile ago.

May your year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful. And don't forget to make some art - write or draw or build or sing as only you can. May your coming year be a wonderful thing, in which you'll dream both dangerously and outrageously. I hope you make something that didn't exist before you made it, that you will be loved and you will be liked, and that you will have people to love and to like in return. And most importantly (because I think there should be more kindness and more wisdom int he world right now), I hope that you will, when you need to be, be wise and that you will always be kind. And I hope, that somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself.

notes on a women's football match

2009-12-11T15:15:00.080+08:00

warning: This post is in Filipino.

'Di natuloy ang training kagabi kaya nakauwi ako nang maaga. At dahil dapat ay may training, wala rin akong trabaho kagabi. Naalala ko iyong sinabi ni Kuya Carl na may mga FIFA games na pinapalabas sa studio 23 gabi-gabi kapag weekdays kaya inendeavor kong hintayin at panoorin iyon.

And what luck, dahil women's under-20 World Cup ang palabas kagabi (pagkatapos ng News Central - na kung saan na-update na naman ako sa mga pangyayari sa bansang Pilipinas at sa ibang parte ng mundo, at nakita ko pa si ate Maj as bonus). Ang laban ay sa pagitan ng Estados Unidos at Korea DPR (anong meron sa komunismo at mga bituin? isama mo na rin ang kulay pula.) Pagkakataon ito ng Korea DPR na depensahan ang titulong nakamit nila dalawang taon ang nakalilipas (noong 2006). So ibig sabihin tuwing dalawang taon ang nakalipas tsaka nagkakaroon ng U-20 women's world cup. Kala ko fixed na pag sinabi mong World Cup, apat na taon muna ang dapat lumipas. Anyway, sasaliksikin ko na lang ang katunayan mamaya, bilang nasa modang pagsususulat muna ako ngayon.

So... mga ilang obserbasyon lamang ang nais kong ipahatid sa post na ito (ano sa Filipino ang post?). Kaya heto't magsisimula na.

Una: Masyadong magkakamukha ang mga Koreyanong manlalaro. Pwede naman kasing iba-iba ang hairstyle nila bilang girls naman silang lahat, but no, kelangan pati ang haircut, uniform dapat. Boys' cut pa. Mukha tuloy silang lalaki, gaya ng sabi sa 'kin sa text ni Judy noong nagsisiumula pa lamang ang palabas.

Pangalawa: Wala pa silang beinte anyos? Hanga talaga ako. Hindi lang sa mga hitsura nila (pero medyo wala akong problema sa itsura ng mga Kano, bilang nasanay na ko sa kanila). Bukod sa parte na sila ng national team ng kani-kanilang bansa, the fact na ganun na ang kalibre ng paglalaro nila (at nakapag-qualify at narating ang stage na ito ng World Cup), ibang klaseng talento at training ang meron at napagdaanan nila. At ang laki ng field ha. Walang sinabi sa pinaglalaruan ng team ko sa Sunken kahit na naka-eleven-a-side na kami. At kaya nilang tumagal dun ng nobenta minutos at magawa ang mga ginagawa nila.

Pangatlo: Kudos sa Estados Unidos U-20 team! Although unang nagpakitang-gilas ang Korea DPR sa apat na shots on target laban sa wala ng EU nung mga unang beinte minuto, nahanap rin nila ang ritmo nila at sunud-sunod na inatake ang goal ng Korea. Sa unang half, lamang ang EU sa possession, around 65% ata. At nagbunga ito ng dalawang magandang goals, para gawing 2-0 ang score pagkatapos ng cuarenta'y cinco minuto.

Pang-apat: Oh yeah, pasintabi sa field. Wala man lang akong makitang hibla ng dahon. Marahil ay epekto iyong ng TV screen. O wala ring gaanong closeups sa ground level.

Panglima: Ang ganda ng kontrol at pasahan ng mga manlalaro ng EU. Ayos din ang positioning. Bawat long ball papunta sa goal nila ay may nakaantabay na defender para i-head palayo. Walang espasyong di napupunan ng mga players. Swabe ang galaw nila, lalo na sa passing. Tanggap ng bola, pasa, takbo, tanggap uli. Ang galing ng pace at reflexes ni Alex Morgan na siyang naka-iskor nung pangalawang goal. Biruin mo iyon, kalaban niya mga tatlong sunud-sunod na defender, at bago siya ma-block nung huling defender, itinira niya ang bola. Perfect shot. Pasok! Under pressure siya the whole time. Amazing.

Pang-anim: (Hmmm, dapat funny muna tapos serious notes ang order nito, pero dahil ayoko nang magbago pa ng mga subheadings ko, itutuloy ko nang ganito.) Sa Santiago, Chile pala ginanap ang kampeonato. Pero ang commentator naman ay mukhang taga-Kanluran at sanay sa Ingles. Medyo nakakatawa lang siyang pakinggan habang iniisa-isa niya ang pangalan ng mga Koreyanong manlalaro kapag sinusundan niya ang pagpasa nila ng bola. Mahahaba kasi ang mga pangalan nila. Tapos mabagal ang pagbigkas, at enunciated ang bawat letra. Parang kumakanta ba, medyo tumotono kasi si kuya.

Pampito: Ang mga long ball ng Korea galing sa kanilang mid ay hindi nakukuha ng kanilang mga forward. Kelangan pa nilang lapitan ang bola para hindi sila unahan ng mga EU defenders. Sayang naman, dahil marami dun ay pinaghihirapang makuha ng kanilang mga defenders, tapos di rin nila mapakikinabangan.

Pangwalo: Astig din ng determinasyon ng bawat isa sa mga manlalaro. Nagtrabaho talaga ng maigi ang Korea DPR nung second half. Walang patid ang pag-atake nila sa goal (naging 45% (Korea) - 55% (EU) ang possession pagkatapos ng game) kaya't todo defend din ang EU. May scene pa ngang parang nagagalit na ang isang defender nila dahil muntik nang pumasok ang bola. Iilang pagkakataon lamang ang binigay ng Korea sa EU para makarating ng striking area. Nagbunga ang lahat ng ito ng isang goal para sa Korea. Nakapasok din. Sayang nga lang at limang minuto na lang ang nalalabi. Baka mas napagbuti pa nila at nakakuha pa ng isang goal kung mas mahaba pa ang oras. Saludo rin ako sa inyo.

Pangsiyam: Ito, ngayon ko lang naalala. Dahil women's World Cup ito, puro babae ang mga opisyales at mga manggagawang makikita mo sa field. Pati ang mga players ay hawak-kamay ang mga batang babae paglabas nila ng field para sa panimulang seremonya. Nakakatuwa lang.

:)

Blog beginnings

2009-12-07T04:04:00.003+08:00

I'm remembering the times when I got to surf the net almost regularly. That was the time when we finally bought a PC and promptly hooked it up with a dial-up internet connection. I saw through the TechTV channel (too bad it disappeared from our cable soon after) about fans of shows like Dawson's Creek (this was the 'in' show at that time) rewriting the episodes to suit their specific tastes. The site was fanfiction.net. One even killed off either Pacey or Joey in a Joey-Pacey ship (that last term I only came to know about two years ago). Popularly known as fanfiction, or fanfic for short, that's the most extreme thing to being a fan of something I've ever heard of at that time.

So off I went to discover the site. Of course, there was a time when I tried to watch Dawson's Creek, so I tried to look at the DC fanfics first. But since I never got to watch the whole series, or even see the pivotal points in the story, I don't think I found a story that would tempt me. I don't know what happened next, but the next thing I remember is going through the Yu Yu Hakusho (locally known as Ghostfighter) fanfics, and I was shocked that there were plenty depicting Hiei and Kurama in romantic tussles and/or relationships (Vincent and Dennis, respectively, for the Pinoy viewers). Since I also hadn't watched the whole series, I wondered how both of them were depicted so as to inspire these storylines and fanarts (yes, I did come across some, but not on the site). And so goes my introduction to yaoi. Yes, m'dears. Wait...

Now back up just one moment. I remember now... The first story I read at FF.net, and one which I printed at that, was between Max and Kyle Valenti of Roswell (another show I was interested in around those times, ca 2000). I just chose one at random, not bothering with the rating (I believe at that time, FF.net still allowed mature stories rated NC-17, which eventually were booted out because they prohibited stories which would merit mature ratings), and I guess the short summary didn't hint at anything either. So imagine my surprise when Kyle and Max (who, during the earlier seasons, aren't exactly the best of friends) started getting it on in the school bathroom. I was shocked of course. Repulsed also, probably. But I guess the novelty of what I was reading prevented me from stopping reading it. It was later on that I would know that I found out the name for what I was reading , gleaned from later encounters with anime yaoi fanfics. So there's my introduction to an entirely different world, nonexistent in my usual TV viewing.

Then I stumbled across the Slam Dunk fanfics. I would bet there's an equal number of yaoi fanfics and fanfics where the male characters acted as males all throughout the story. Which is how I got addicted to reading romantic fanfics. Most of the ones I've read revolve around Rukawa Kaede. Mitsui Hisashi comes second. I especially like Rukawa x OC (own character) stories because he was quite impenetrable, and I was amazed at how these writers got him to star in his own romance story. Whether it's chipping off the icy facade revealing a hurt past, or that one girl which would make him talk in complete sentences - I had fun reading those. And there are a lot of guys from four different teams. One writer even had a fanfic ongoing for each one of them - sadly, she didn't get to finish everything. But I love the one she wrote about Rukawa (the only complete fanfic I ever printed, and which is missing as of the moment) and its sequel. I just loved seeing their characters doing things besides playing basketball and competing with each other. (Other fun discoveries where Hermione Granger x Draco Malfoy stories :D) And here I discovered Filipina fanfic writers. On their profile pages, they placed the urls of their blogs. I saw two of those and they were appended with .blogspot.com after the name of the blog.

Before this, I came across a personal site by a Filipino teenager also, named Le Cafe Bleue. She had a sort of journal, a few short stories still in progress and some other stuff. She had different sites under that one name. The design of the website was, I believe, conceptualized by her, since it seemed personally made to me and different from the other sites I've been viewing. So there she is, an anonymous writer and web geek (she knew HTML and CSS and other sorts of cool stuff), and the bloggers writing fanfics. I think they set the impetus for me to set up my own blog, and remaining semi-anonymous until today, when website domains containing the users' own names are the norm.

I've been trying to keep a diary as early as grade four, so it was no surprise to me that I would use my blog as an online diary, since that was how blogs were used back then. Now, when I started blogging in May 2004, there were a number of domains to choose from (I searched the net for choices and even went through the tours). One of the more popular ones was livejournal. Another was blogdrive. But I wanted a url where my name would be placed before the host site, much like how blogger urls are. LJ didn't have that so it was out. Blogdrive and blogger were the only ones who satisfied the criteria, but the blogdrive blogs I have come across had boring-looking themes. Hence this blog that is now 5 years old still retains the url it started with.

There is still anonymity in the net. But I like to think back to those times where I think anonymity truly reigned, social networking was still to be conceptualized and you can't find anything if you search yourself on yahoo or google unless you're really famous (like the stuff encyclopedias are made of) - a time when things were generally simpler, online and offline. I guess that's why I'm still sticking to this blog and this url, as a reminder of the old days - my continuing fascination with writing, and having a little corner all your own on the vast out there that is the World Wide Web.

23

2009-12-02T11:35:00.003+08:00

Does warm milk taste good with dark mildly sweet chocolate? Or is it the other way around? I'm wondering because I've got a bar of chocolate in my room, but I've already drunk up all of my milk in the dining room. What's left with me here is water.

Another random thought: I finally found my cough meds after days of hiding in my bag, and apparently, the other set was on the bed. Just in time. My cough (which is now about two weeks old) has worsen overnight (which might have been caused by my late night to early morning spells in front of the PC). yes, even though I'm just tutoring, a much-too-connected me is spending plenty of time on the net well after tutoring hours are over (yes, I've told myself a few times before that I need to disconnect).

It's December! Some sort of Christmasy mood is making itself felt. Little by little, I hear people wondering about what they would get for others this Christmas (as we can notice, my generation has changed - we think about others first before we think about ourselves ^_^) . What drove the fact (that Christmas is just 23 days *gasp* away) home to me was when I was reading Avalon.ph's monthly newsletter that for those who are gonna be ordering stuff as gifts for the holidays should take note of the deadline so that the deliveries will be completed on time. Things have been evolving. Now, we wouldn't just have to contend with beating the Christmas rush as we go shopping on foot; the mail-order business (yes, my dears, I'm quite new to this; rephrase that - I haven't had any experiences with this not with my family, or any close friends, so yes, this comes as a new experience to me) also experiences a lot of pressure around this time of the year.

<Singit uli ng isa pang random thought (haha)> I couldn't find the Dong-A pen which writes like a sign pen. I tried going back to the events of last Sunday but my memory tells me my hand was the last to take hold of it. Bagong-bago pa naman iyon. Di ka pa nga makikita ng bawas sa level ng ink sa loob nun. Sana naman isa na naman siyang case ng misplaced-but-will-soon-be-found. Mura lang naman siya, siyam na piso, pero kapatid ko pa bibili nun sa Maynila. Tsaka sayang talga iyon.

Kanina, habang nag-aagahan ako (chicken noodles + adobo-flavored tuna with rice), may mga naisip akong firsts. Iyong mga perstaym kong maexperience nitong mga nagdaang taon, mga 5 years back lang naman. Naiinis ako dahil di ko maalala iyong una kong naisip. Ready-ng ready pa naman ako nun na isulat silang lahat. Parang pangkalahatang theme para sa post na 'to (bilang nag-aadik na naman ako sa buhay net at isinama ang sariling blog sa NaBloPoMo blogroll for December). Another time then.