i am the diva

WELCOME ZENTANGLERS!

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Thu, 25 Oct 2012 21:24:00 +0000

If you've recently purchased or received the new Zentangle book The Book of Zentangle by Rick Roberts and Maria Thomas, and you've come here looking for my weekly challenge, please visit my Certified Zentangle Teacher blog - www.iamthedivaczt.blogspot.com

See you there!

gotta love 'dem prairies

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Tue, 26 Jun 2012 20:32:00 +0000

Last night, just as we were falling asleep in bed, B-rad and i were suddenly awakened by the sound of heavy rain...and hail.... we got up and watched an amazing light show as the sky lit up again and again with intense lightning.

check out some images of last night's storm on this website

today there is still a Tornado watch in effect, and i'm pondering whether or not i should go to yoga.... i think i still should.

fuck yeah.

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Wed, 20 Jun 2012 05:32:00 +0000

For a little over a year now, i've been going off and on to Hot Yoga at one of the studios here. I don't get to go as often as i'd like, but i always feel awesome afterwards.

For those of you who don't know, it's a series of poses done in a 40C degree studio (that's 104F) with high humidity so you can get deeper poses and you sweat like a mofo.

In the times that i've gone, when i get too hot, or work too hard, or start to feel woozy, i would take a breather and lay down on my mat in Savasana and just recover.

Now, i'm no teeny tiny little yoga girl. I've had two kids, and one with special needs, and unfortunately - i eat when i'm stressed. Just painting a picture.

a few weeks ago i went to a class after a long hiatus, and i really felt the body image issues - it's tough being the only chubby girl in a room full of graceful beautiful yoga bodies.

Today, though, before heading into the yoga studio, on a sign i had probably seen over and over each class - one line popped out at me.

"Yoga is not a competitive sport, it's a process of self acceptance"

huh.

So, i walked into the studio and put my mat down on the floor, thinking about that. Running it over and over in my head. thinking about the words; it's a process of self acceptance.

Okay.

And class began.

And i rocked.

Not that i got each pose right, and not that i was super flexible, but my perception of the class changed. My perception of yoga had changed.

My class was fuller than any class i'd been to tonight, and i happened to be standing next this stunning blond who could bend into a pretzle. My initial thought was we look like the number 10. (she's the 1)... then i caught myself....

"No. THIS is what my body looks like RIGHT NOW, and i'm just going to do the pose the BEST that i can, in this body, right now."

it was the best yoga class of my life.

and i made it through the class, doing each pose - not sitting out one posture, but powering through. in fact, there was one time when i was on the floor and i thought "Uhnnn, i'll sit this next one out" and the instructor said to the class: "Okay, you can do this!" and i thought: "Yeah! I CAN do this.... i'm not that tired, i'm just lazy" so i carried on.

I'm not saying that every class that i take from here on in is going to be amazing, but if i can just remember and keep in my mind that it's NOT a competition, and so what if i'm rounder than everyone else here - i'm HERE! i SHOWED UP, and i can do this.

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Wed, 21 Dec 2011 22:05:00 +0000

oh man,

i just told Chewie that if he did not lay down on the couch and close his eyes, i would call Santa and tell him to take all his toys to someone else.

result? Three year old - who NEVER naps... snoring on the couch.

I wish this calling Santa thing could last all year...

Back in time

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Fri, 18 Nov 2011 16:00:00 +0000

If you could go back in time to any era, for one week, where would you go?

I'm not sure I could pin it down. There are so many interesting periods. Possibly I'd like to visit San Fransico in the mid sixties. Or maybe the late fifties early sixties in New York City. Is it terrible to choose a time frame based on fashion? Probably.

Whenever I think of these types of questions, I'm always forced to think of the time period I'd like to visit, then I ponder he status of women in that time frame... Inevitably I always come back to the mid-sixties. The world was changing, the music was awesome, women were finding their voices, free love, mind altering drugs were experimented with before the knowledge of "flashbacks".... I think being a flower child would have suited me. As much as I would live to visit ancient Egypt or 15th century England, the idea of being a slave or a man's property or having no rights and being not much more than a walking baby factory, a week might be a tad much. Give me free love in the sixties.

What about you?

RANT!! in G Minor

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Sun, 30 Oct 2011 05:47:00 +0000

Just now, in my facebook feed... i saw this posted as someone's status and i just had to drop everything:

HEY YOU... yeah, I mean you. If you have taken a minute to read this... God has seen YOU struggling with something. God says its over. A blessing is coming your way. If you believe in God send this message on, please don't ignore it, you are being tested. God is going to fix two things (BIG) tonight in your favor. If you believe in God... drop everything and repost.**

my initial response was to write some big OHMYFUCKINGOD response... but then i was like, no... no... i can't do that. not on facebook. i mean, i really don't want to offend anyone, but i CANNOT TELL YOU how much i was offended by this.

first of all.... "God has seen YOU struggling with something. God says it's over"... Great! so, what you're saying is, if i drop everything and repost this, God is going to magically go in with his 'magic' and repair all of Artoo's damaged cranial nerves? If i drop everything and repost this, will Artoo suddenly learn how to smile? "...please don't ignore it, you are being tested..." Really? REALLY?!? REEEEEAAAALLLY???? God is testing me, through facebook. Really. With Seth and Amy. Really. FUCKING REALLY!?? God is going to fix two big things tonight in my favour.... wow.

I really am not a big fan of those copy/paste status updates in general, you know the ones... with some random statistic about the percentage of people who know someone with (Insert disease/condition here) and how if you want to end said disease/condition, copy and paste to your status update, and if you don't, that obviously means you are a terrible person, cuz clearly you must like this disease and hope people continue to suffer. ENOUGH, they make me crazy, but this one takes the goddamned cake.

Does anyone honestly believe that God will make all their problems go away because they copied and pasted some random bullshit that they saw on someone elses wall? For Fuck sake. Or is it the oh-so-ominous: "IF you believe in God send this message on" that makes them think, "well, i don't want someone to think i DON'T believe!!" or perhaps the veiled threat of: "YOU ARE BEING TESTED" and maybe they're making sure that their bases are covered.

Also, this totally preys on peoples emotions... "oh my god... I AM going through something!! This status is for me!!!"

well.

i'll tell you one thing.

posting some prepackaged shit you saw somewhere else is not going to get salvation.
if i'm being tested by facebook, i hate to think what the hell all this other shit i'm going through is for...

God doesn't care.

if God exists at all (which i'm not entirely certain about, at least, not in the way that western christianized culture would have us believe...even more so now that i'm dealing with Artoo's health), i don't think that he's some grandpa in the sky who's sitting at his laptop checking to see if Johnny DoGooder passed his test by posting that 'status' on his wall.

Ranty rant rant rant.
This is why i have a blog. sigh.

i'm sorry. but that really bummed me out today. super bummed.

Also, if you're going to leave me some kind of preachy comment, don't bother. you're not going to convert me, just saying.

**I should clarify that it was the pre-written update itself that made me crazy, not the person who posted it.

my blog had a birthday

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 16:26:00 +0000

Happy 9th birthday bloggity blog.
NINE YEARS!?!?

oh my.

Hey, if any of you have been reading since the beginning, holy crap! you are loyal.

and i love you.
I love this blog too. sorry, this blog has some serious neglected older child syndrome.

thanks for sticking it out, interwebs.
Love Laura

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 08:14:00 +0000

it's 2 am.

quite frankly, i have not been up at 2 am for some time.

it sucks.

eff you, 2 am.

Artoo decided he needed a midnight snack, once he was back in bed Chewie started crying - i walked into his room, he said: "Mama, i'm sad. I'm sad because, i did a bad dream." so, we cuddled in his bed and he went back to sleep.

me? i have this 'feeling' in my gut. i don't know what it is. but i can't get back to sleep. My hands and feet are swollen, i drank a glass of water.

the house is too quite. sitting in the darkened kitchen, i can hear the wind outside the patio doors, a dog is barking somewhere.
my quiet crescent is full of sleeping people, and i'm pretty insanely jealous.
sigh.

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Mon, 19 Sep 2011 20:11:00 +0000

A. Age: 31
B. Bed size: Queen, big enough to be comfy - small enough to be close
C. Chore that you hate: dishes, the kitchen in general.
D. Dogs: not really a dog person, although i assume that we'll get one as the boys get older. Preferably, i'd like an older dog that's already trained.
E. Essential start to your day: Coffee. plain and simple.
F. Favorite color: Purple and Blue, also brown... and green, and orange, and red... essentially all colours except yellow. i'm not WILD about yellow.
G. Gold or Silver: white gold or silver
H. Height: 5'5"
I. Instruments you play: guitar, clarinet, piano, although none of them particularly well
J. Job title: stay-at-home mama, housewife, writer/blogger.
K. Kids: Two great little boys
L. Live: The Skatch
M. Mother’s name: Diana
N. Nicknames: Diva
O. Overnight hospital stays: Several - for various surgeries, and child births, and Artoo hospitalizations
P. Pet peeves: passive-aggressiveness and people who don't signal when they're driving
Q. Quote from a movie: and in the end, you turned into a great big fish.
R. Right or left handed: Right handed.
S. Siblings: one older brother, two younger brothers
U. Underwear: full bum, low waist, bikini cut.
V. Vegetable you hate: uhm, eggplant? but i've never really given it a try...
W. What makes you run late: two boys
X. X-Rays you’ve had: face for nose break, arm for arm break, gastro for gall stones
Y. Yummy food that you make: salads, various tasty salads
Z. Zoo animal: Panda

Seven Year Itch

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Sat, 10 Sep 2011 15:41:00 +0000

i've stood over a train grate, and that hot air smells like ass.

So, last week B-rad and i celebrated our seven year anniversary... Artoo had just come home that day from a 5 day stay in the hospital, so needless to say... i was pretty tired.

How did we spend our time together? well, we put the kids to bed... then... i slipped into something a little more...comfortable.... like yoga pants and a bunny hug (or hoodie, if you rather).... and we played a game of scrabble. and i won.

Then i was tired.

So we went to bed.

Perhaps that's not the best way to stave off the seven year itch... i probably should have had some kind of silky underthings under my yoga pants, and we probably should have rocked each others' worlds in the sack.... probably....

Honestly, where did the time go? I never really think about time, it's so abstract... until i think things like - Chewie is three... and we've lived in this house for almost 5 years...

i saw a pin on pinterest that said: "I still think that 1991 was ten years ago" yeah... totally! that's me.

So, the seven year itch... this is the psychological phenomenon wherein the fire goes out in the marriage and boredom sets in. Does the seven year itch only take into account the years of actual married life? Because B-rad and i have been together for 13 years, give or take. So, by those standards, our seven year itch would have been during our first year of marriage. WIN!

I've been told that B-rad and i have a great relationship. It's true though. I mean, our marriage is by no stretch of the imagination, perfect. but pretty damn near.

I'm not one to give advice very often... but here's a totally arbitrary list of things that have made our marriage awesome:

1.) if at all possible, try to do a long distance relationship before getting married. B-rad and i did this for 2 years. As much as it sucked, it was probably one of the best things for our relationship. By only communicating by phone and email (this was the dark ages before Facebook, or Skype, or FaceTime for iPhones...) we really had to actually talk. It was all we could do. That, and the phone sex. Lots and lots of phone sex. (Man, where was the FaceTime for iPhone then!!??) We really got to know each other in those two years, and it also helped us build our communications skills.

2.) Marry your best friend. Yeah. Cliche, i know, but cliche for a reason. Granted, B-rad was not my best friend when started dating, but by the time i knew we were supposed to be together forever he was. And still is.

3.) Inside Jokes. Honestly, inside jokes are one of the corner stones of our relationship. Sometimes it feels like we are speaking in some crazy elaborate code, because at any given time - one of us will say or do something that will trigger the other to response... be it movie lines, song lyrics, or just something that one of us did one day that the other one of us ran with, and now it's something we do all the time.... That "secret code" of inside jokes is very intimate. It's like, a reminder in the middle of the day that B-rad gets me and i get him.

4.) Share your fantasies. Everyone has 'em. I mean, even the ones that you think that make you a creepster. If you are in a loving and trusting relationship, then share. It has made our sex life phenomenal, and also - it's kind of nice to know that he trusts you enough to share EVERYTHING that makes him tick... y'know, more than just a blow job... allllll of it.... and it's nice for me to be able to share what gets my rocks off. Cuz, i mean, i'm a creative girl... sometimes my fantasies are a little...creative. and he's okay with that. and he gets into that. and WE get into that.

5.) Let the guy watch porn. honestly. lift the taboo. they're going to do it anyway, why make them feel guilty for it? I realize that this can be a very touchy subject... but if you can find a way to get past the porn (if it's an issue for you) you should really try. Why not see if you can find something to watch together? or buy an issue of Penthouse letters when you have a long car ride ahead of you (hopefully without kids in the back seat) and surprise him by reading to him while he drives. Or write him your own penthouse letter, and completely lay out your fantasies... i guarantee it will be a well read letter, and it will go into his spank bank... because maybe he IS watching porn, but he's likely imagining its YOU he's watching.

6.) Sometimes, dudes go 'solo'....if you know what i mean. Before you moved in together, he probably did it all the time, every night... so cut the guy some slack. In my humble opinion, unless i'm willing to give it up every night, i'm willing to let him blow off some steam on his own. This, of course, is also true for me... y'know, sometimes i wanna just rub one out quickly... ;)

7.) Laugh. Often.

8.) Share your interests - get interested in what he's interested in, and he should get interested in what you're interested in. I'm not saying you should learn how to rebuild cars or anything, but at least pay attention when he's talking about it. Likewise, he doesn't have to learn all the words to "The Music of the Night" but he should come with you to see the show when it's in town.

9.) Hold on to your self. The YOU that he fell in love with. Your role as a wife, partner, mother, caregiver, hommaker, breadwinner, etc., are all aspects of you but the core YOU is still in there. Make sure that you find time to stay yourself. Do things for yourself. That YOU like to do. On your own. Likewise, let him keep the HIM that you fell in love with.

10.) Whenever possible - remember to make out. Like you did before you were sleeping together. B-rad and i, as you may imagine, don't have a lot of the 'free time' that we used to have... but we try to get in a good make out session every once in a while... like, remember when you were in high school dating.... and you're watching TV with your boyfriend and your little brother runs upstairs to get a drink and you know you have, like, at least 2 minutes of smooch time before he comes back and starts talking about The Legend of Zelda?? that. It's hot. and it's awesome. and sometimes, we only have 2 minutes. But they are a SOLID two minutes.

So, there you have it. 10 Golden rules that have helped B-rad and i make it passed the 7 year mark.

a rant... about boobs and milk coming out of them...or in my case, not.

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 18:01:00 +0000

this week, while Artoo was in the hospital (yes, again) i downloaded the new PostSecret app for my phone... and one of the first secrets i saw was about a woman who said more than anything, she wishes she could have nursed her babies.

I immediately felt a connection with her - know the feeling, but then saw a reply - someone who said; "I have devoted myself to nursing, and i judge other women who choose to bottle feed."

Now, i should say that before i had Chewie and Artoo - i felt all smug in my belief that breast is best. And to this day - i still believe that breastfeeding IS the best option. IF it's an option. In my case it wasn't. But it wasn't like we didn't try... and we tried so hard... when Artoo was in NICU i locked myself in a dark room every 2 hours, attached to that god-awful big yellow breast pump... just trying to get anything to happen.... when i did start producing milk it was a huge victory! I was able to supply my tiny infant with enough milk to sustain him while he was in the hospital... which, for the record, was forty days. When we finally did bring him home, i would spend my nights feeding Artoo a bottle, getting him back to sleep, then pumping.... try to get back to sleep - only to wake up 30 minutes later to feed Artoo his next bottle... i was stressed out, i was exhausted... it's no surprise the well dried up.

And for the record? I felt HUGE amounts guilt. I felt horrible that my body stopped producing, i felt terrible that i couldn't keep a baby in for 9 months, then on top of that i couldn't feed him.... things that are supposed to come naturally to women... i just couldn't seem to do.

I know a few girlfriends who are going through similar things right now - babies who wouldn't or couldn't or still can't nurse or even bottle feed.

God. I used to think that religious folks were the judgiest ones out there, but i stand corrected. Self-righteous-holier-than-thou-everything-is-organic-and-i-nurse-my-babies-until-they-were-8-and-we-never-have-the-tv-on-and-own-only-wooden-freetrade-non-plastic-toys-and-cloth-diaper-promoting-mommy-bitches....are the worst.

HEY LADIES!! GET OVER YOUR FUCKING SELVES!!

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but you are not entitled to push your agenda on my any more than the Mormon Missionaries who keep trying to get me to come back to church! (dudes, it's been like 15 years, give it a rest).

Don't think that i don't see the way you look at me with distaste when i feed my baby...not only from a bottle (GASP) but with formula (DOUBLE GASP!)

sometimes its NOT a choice

and when my kid needs suctioning regularly to help him breathe, sometimes the only thing that will keep the 3 year old out of the way and safe is the TV.... and you try being 3 and playing with a wooden ball and stick on a string for more than 2 minutes.

So, when i hear or see someone admit that they judge me based on my ability or seemingly lack of desire to nurse my child, it throws me into a bit of a rage.

How dare you?

You don't know anything about me, or how hard it was to give up trying... but i have a healthy baby who is absolutely one of the brightest parts of my day... and he knows that i love him more than anything and that i did everything i could, and still am, to make sure that he is safe and loved and growing.

some artsy things i'm doing

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Sat, 27 Aug 2011 01:36:00 +0000

i have been addicted to reading about art journalling for almost 2 years. Books, magazines, blogs, articles, youtube videos, you name it... so then i was like... maybe i should do it...

I have my own little art journal, it's coming along, progressing as i progress... but i never really gave it much time or affection.

So, i decided to join a facebook group for a Traveling Art Journal. A whole bunch of folks signed up and we've all been mailing out our journals in a round-robin, until everyone has had a chance to work in everyone's journals.

this has been pretty fun.

i wanted to show the pages i've done so far.

click to enlarge

I'm really hoping i can win this GIVEAWAY - oh the things i could do with those fun things!!

Alphabetical Gratitude

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Wed, 24 Aug 2011 16:35:00 +0000

G

Gspot...ohh yeah...
Grapes
Gravy
Goals
Granparents

on this day in 2009

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Wed, 24 Aug 2011 16:28:00 +0000

Chewie took his first steps... now the kid won't stay still for more than 3 seconds....

oh, what a world.

Alphabetical Gratitude

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Mon, 22 Aug 2011 15:41:00 +0000

F

French Fries
Feathers
Forests
Friends
Freedom

Alphabetical Gratitude

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 15:11:00 +0000

E

eggs and bacon (i honestly can't believe i didn't say bacon back on letter B day)
Experts who share knowledge
Elevators
Evergreens - they smell so nice
Elastic - it makes my pants comfy!

for you crafty peeps, check out this big giveaway here http://scrappinforkenzie.blogspot.com/2011/07/100-follower-giveaway.html

Alphabetical Gratitude

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Mon, 15 Aug 2011 16:21:00 +0000

D

Dad - he's great
dancing
driving
doodling
dreams - the good ones

Wicked Awesome

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Sat, 13 Aug 2011 22:12:00 +0000

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful diva named Laura who was granted a magical trip to Oz with her very favourite Italian sex machine, Saviabella.

Savia had scored free Media tickets to the opening night of Wicked: The Musical and she took me as her date!! i'm so lucky.

we both looked amazingly hot - according to Chewie, we looked like princesses.

After some minor drama of trying to find a place to grab a bite, finding a place, having my car backed into by another car (luckily no damage), we made it to the show in time to be schmoozed by a big-wig media type guy who treated us the same as he treated the other media types...radio personalities, newspaper journalists, etc., we were STARS!!

holy cow, we are smokin!

We grabbed a quick glass of wine and i was brimming with excitement. i have never seen the musical before, Savia saw it in London... i knew a few of the songs (from Glee...nerd) and mostly... I WAS OUT OF MY FUCKING HOUSE FOR A REASON BESIDES BABY HOSPITALIZATION!!! WOO!!

Contraband iPhoto pic - i'm a frakkin' rebel, man!!

The first half of the show was amazing. The cast was great, there was humour, great music, dancing, amazing sets and the costumes were fab!! seamless scene changes!! i loved the chemistry between Elphaba and Galinda. i feel like i should read the book now.

Wicked Drinks

At intermission, we had these tasty green drinks - anything with that much pineapple juice in it is a win in my books.

Wicked Shoes (mine) and Wicked dress (Savia's)

Not only did the show rock, but check out my shoes! yeeeeah!!

i had an amazing time, i'm so thankful she took me... then we went back to my house, where i proceeded to get accidentally drunk. i may or may not have flashed Savia my boobs... it's all kind of fuzzy....

Alphabetical Gratitude

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Sat, 13 Aug 2011 21:56:00 +0000

C

calf tattoos (and by that i mean tattoos located on one's calf, not tattoos of baby cows...B-rad's is especially sexy - and by that i mean his calf tattoo, not his baby cow)
crayons (and the way they smell all waxy and schooly)
COFFEE (and the amazing people who roast and sell special Artoo blend coffee as a fundraiser to help us get to Philadelphia next year)
Cruiser (my little gold PT)
cheese (in it's many forms, in it's many uses)

Alphabetical Gratitude

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Fri, 12 Aug 2011 15:06:00 +0000

B

baby snuggles
blue
bagels
bananas
and of course, saving the best for last - b-rad <3

Alphabetical Gratitude

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Thu, 11 Aug 2011 16:24:00 +0000

i saw this meme going around on facebook; every day post 5 things you're grateful for - each day a new letter - and i wanted to play too... so, alphabetically - i'm thankful for:

A:

asparagus - baked with olive oil and parmesan...mmm....
awe - the way it feels to be in it.
accents - all of them, but especially scottish and austrailian
accountants - i'm useless at math
abode - without my abode i'd be homeless

what the?

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Thu, 04 Aug 2011 04:10:00 +0000

it's august.

it's mutha fucking august.

i have left my house less that 10 times in the past month.

Saskatchewan summers only last 2 months, and mine's practically over.

wtf?

Every activity is weighed against the possibility of Artoo going to the hospital - and in most cases, staying home and out of the hospital wins.

sigh.

how's your summer?

listy mcgee

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Thu, 28 Jul 2011 21:21:00 +0000

things that annoy me, in no particular order

1. zits. seriously, face! i'm 31 years old. enough already.
2. mosquitoes. Thanks, you've ruined my summer - jerks.
3. medical professionals who speak to me like i'm six.
4. my hair right now. honestly. the words "rats nest" come to mind.
5. Javier Colon winning The Voice - he didn't annoy me so much as the fact that it was apparent that he would win from the get-go.
6. Cilantro. bleh. why this is used at all is beyond me. tastes like BLEH.
7. when a business does not have a website in this day and age.
8. when i don't get called back after leaving a voice mail.
9. PEOPLE WHO ONLY KNOW HOW TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS ON FACEBOOK - (WHO ARE FRIENDS WITH MY MOM) WHO WILL NOT STOP SCREAMING IN INTERNET-SPEAK!
10. random shrimp - in dips, on pizza.... shrimp should not be a random ingredient. :(
11. those people who, when with a group of friends, have to monopolize the conversation at all times - those people are often one-uppers, which also annoy me...

things i enjoy in no particular order

1. drinking wine and writing open letters as facebook statuses.
2. Puppets
3. new journals and the feeling of possibilites
4. Coffee
5. beautiful slobbery face kisses from Artoo - and his older brother's random hugs and spontaneous i love yous.
6. stripey knee high socks
7. art journals - i love looking at them as much if not more than making my own.
8. MY GOD! CURRY!!!
9. online shopping. maybe a litte too much...
10. hot yoga...i miss you hot yoga...
11. New tattoos
12. Warm cozy sweaters/scarves.
13. actual mail in the actual mail.
14. Pinterest - maybe a little TOO much

sometimes i drink wine and write facebook statuses...

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Thu, 28 Jul 2011 20:31:00 +0000

Dear Business Owners,
if, by this day and age, you STILL do not have a website for your business, you are losing business...case in point? me.
Love Laura

Dear Pizza Pops,
Maybe it's all the wine i drank half an hour ago talking - i know you should taste like pizza, but you kinda taste like pie. It's kinda weird. But i kinda like it.
Love Laura

Dear Red Wine,
I love you. Don't tell White Wine. He wouldn't understand.
Love Laura

Dear B-rad,
mat leave + you on holidas + me drunk + you mudding the drywall = a pretty sweet Wednesday night.
Love Laura

Dear Burt Reynolds aka The Bandit,
You have the most bad ass mustache.
Love Laura

Dear Walmart Greeter,
thank you for giving ceddy two "happy smiles" stickers even though he was bringing the crankypants. You are someone's grandpa, aren't you?
Love Laura.

Dear arm,
You feel hurty. But you're so beautiful.
Love Laura.

Dear Human Race,
How any of us made it through the "why" stage without being murdered in our sleep is beyond me.
Love Laura

Dear Shiraz,
I am amazed at your incredible ability to make me a better whistler. Thank you, Shiraz, thank you.
Love Laura

Dear Early 80s Genesis,
Thank you for so many whistle-able tunes.
Love Laura

Dear Steve Miller
.....what the hell is a pompitous? You can't go around just making up words willy nilly. That's just redinkuloush. See? It doesn't work! Unless, of course, you're James Lipton. Scrumptulescent.
Love Laura

Dear Facebook
Are you sick of this yet?
Love Laura.

Dear Tooth #4
i see you peeking from that gum, just get out here already!
Love Laura

Dear Facebook,
I'm drinking wine again.
That is all.
Love Laura

please vote!

noreply@blogger.com (i am the diva) — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 18:09:00 +0000

Local Saskatoon band The Sheepdogs are in the finals to be on the cover of The Rolling Stone... please vote for them! kai thx bai!