I Heart Shiny Things

Hello Kitty = Stop.

2012-01-16T23:54:00.000-08:00

It's no secret that I love Hello Kitty. If you follow the blog, you'll see plenty of posts dedicated to Hello Kitty products. As much as I do enjoy Hello Kitty stuff, it needs to stop. My room is starting to look like a 2nd grader's dream house. On February 2, 2012, I will be 26 years old. Disgusting, I know. Unfortunately I have to grow up. So, Hello Kitty, keep it moving. We're breaking up. I need some time to grow.

BAAANGS!!!

2012-01-08T17:24:00.000-08:00

As you may remember, in December of 2009, I gave up my bangs (Click hair to remember)
Lately I've been getting this strange desire to get my bangs back. I know! Even after all the trouble I went through to grow them out. I'm a loca.

But now there's a fix for this! Clip-in bangs from eBay! I did my research and made sure to get my EXACT hair color so my bangs would blend in. Although I wanted them a bit more blunt, I think the side-swept thing makes me look more grown up. What do you think?

Te gusta?!

Style Icon: Basketball Wives Earrings

2012-01-08T16:23:00.000-08:00

I feel like I am in need of a big earring collection. I wear the regular gold hoops for work, and I even began wearing studs a few years ago to be taken seriously. NO MORE! I need to keep it real. When it comes to earrings, I'm a human peacock. Big earrings is part of the reason why we founded I Heart Shiny Things. We heart large-and-in-charge earrings that make people wonder if they make our ears hurt. Big earrings are sometimes like heels; they hurt you sometimes, but if you're a real boss, you wear them the whole night. Neosporin that shit in the morning--you'll live.

After ~~binging-watching~~ catching a few episodes of Basketball Wives (I'm late on the Basketball Wives/Real Housewives thing. But $Cruz keeps me updated and answers my annoying questions). I came to a lot of realizations. Yes, their depictions of women of color are AWFUL, but yet why can't I keep my eyes away? I also watch just see what their wearing and their earrings. Not so much for the labels or the status of expensive items, but purely for aesthetics. I swear.

I really found myself attracted to these earrings below:

First of all, bamboo earrings and I are ride-or-die. Forever in my heart. But bedazzled with crystals? I HATE bedazzled things! They are so gaudy (even for me!) I decided that I would sleep on this life-altering revelation and see if I still felt the same in a couple of days. Well... I still heart them. While perusing eBay, I fell head over heels:

I can't WAIT for their arrival!

DRUNK CASSEROLE

2012-01-07T00:04:00.000-08:00

First of all I would prepare and eat this for real. Also, I think that if I had a cooking channel, it would resemble something like this:

Just Dance 3: Best Video Game Ever

2012-01-03T23:43:00.000-08:00

Whilst Christmas shopping for others this holiday season, I decided to treat myself to Just Dance 3 for Nintendo Wii. I gave myself the best present! Check the trailer below:

I made the mistake of playing with $cruz. She's highly competitive which means that we both work up a sweat. Yes, $cruz wins most of the time. Whatever, I have HEART when I dance and that's all that matters. You know what I rule at? Bobby Brown's My Prerogative on Dance Central for Xbox. I do enjoy both dance games, however Wii for some reason is a better work out. My arms were sore, but that could be because I have the upper body strength of a newborn baby. #Jus'sayin.

Why Can't I Stop Watching...

2011-12-28T00:00:00.000-08:00

What do channels like Oxygen? WE? Vh1? Bravo? Lifetime? Etc? All have in common? The portrayal of women is beyond horrible. All "programming for women" are packaged shows that showcase all levels of crazy, from party fights to full on murder. But why do I continue to watch??? This is no rhetorical question, I for real wonder why I indulge so hard on these TV shows.

Current obsessions:

Snapped

I went on a total binge

of this show during Christmas. Yes, I spent the whole day for baby Jesus watching shows about women killing their dudes. Like I couldn't stop watching. I watched so many episodes that I got scared and stayed at my sister's house because I didn't want to get stabbed. But this show is a trip, it sucks you in! All men should watch this show, I'm sure many more men would wash dishes or take out the trash. Girlfriend could SNAP!

Love & Hip Hop

This show has something extra that other trashy women bashing shows don't have...not sure exactly what that is. Perhaps it has an extra level of jealousy/drama. This show won my heart so fast. Between lady fights and Jim Jones never opening his eyes, it's an entertaining time. But again, it's a film crew following around lady fights...these ladies fight HARD. So much purchased hair gets torn up.

The Truth About Cats & Dogs

2011-12-27T23:40:00.000-08:00

When I was 10-11 years old, my favorite movies to watch were: First Wives Club, The Craft, & The Truth About Cats & Dogs. Obviously I had different movie tastes than my peers. Basically I was a blast at sleepovers when I suggested to watch these films I was watching movies about old divorced ladies, crazy teen witches, and a rom-com based on lying.

Tonight I decided to take a walk down memory lane and I watched The Truth About Cats & Dogs. Janeane Garafalo was the 90's "Liz Lemon" type, therefore I relate to her weird awkward girl roles, including her role as Abby in this film. But I must say, watching this film after so many years is pretty hilarious. It has that great "real" 90's fashion, not the cute stuff they're trying to make happen right now, rather the ill fitting sweaters and coats and a healthy dose of mom/dad jeans. Also, this film includes the pre-Ray Jamie Foxx, the pre-Blame it on the alcohol Jamie Foxx. He literally uses this line: "She is all that and a bag of chips" in reference to Uma Thurman's character. So he should have won an Oscar for this role instead.

Also, I forgot about the weird phone sex scene. As a child, yes I watched that scene, I was confused and didn't know what they were doing. No big deal, I waved my tiny child sausage fingers at that PG-13 rating.

I would also spill salsa on my t-shirt if I for real liked a boy:

This is streaming on Netflix, get on that...

Sh*t Girls Say

2011-12-21T08:44:00.000-08:00

I find this to be too accurate, both versions of this. Whether it's coming from my own mouth or others, it rings true. Watch the white girl version and the black girl version.

Open Letter to $Cruz and Marble$ from 2009/2010

2011-12-21T00:42:00.000-08:00

Remember when $cruz and I would describe the hell that was most of 2009? (click here to recall that hell)
In hindsight, there are a few things I did appreciate during that time, and of course, things I would have done much differently. I'm mostly referring to Dec 2009 and Early 2010. Sure, I lived out of a suitcase and slept next to my friend for four straight months on a mattress on the floor. Did I scare her when I would randomly yell in my sleep? Yes. Did I wake up accidentally spooning her? Sometimes. However, we had this pizazz for life that I would like to recapture for 2012. We had nothing to lose and nothing to our name. A mental and literal Ground Zero. Too soon for the Ground Zero reference? Fine, this time in our life was a clean slate.

Circa 2009/2010

Dear $Cruz and Marble$ of 2009/2010:

How are you? I heard about your first official jobs after graduating. Congratulations! That sucks that they pay you in pennies and peanuts. Sallie Mae has also started to breathe down your neck and collect money like they were the mafia. At least you have a small enough income to start buying things to make you look fly. See! That's a silver lining to this shit-storm you feel is your life.

On the really real, I'm writing you all because I need your poor-girl-nothing-to-lose swag. The drive that is making you get up every morning at 5:00 a.m. so you can catch the MAX and endure a 2-hour commute. Let me just go over some things that I would like to copy from you.

Leave the House in Full Makeup by 6:30 a.m.

You all started to REALLY play with makeup during this time. No under-eye circles and a fierce liquid eyeliner job. When you'd go out, you'd at least try to put on fake eyelashes (even if they made your eyes red, huh Marb$?) I sometimes wear my glasses sans makeup. I'm such an animal.

Go Through Hellfire to Find the Perfect Outfit

I heard about the time you all waited for the bus for about an HOUR in the rain trying to venture to the mall. Your commitment was clear: to find the perfect New Year's Eve dress. I just rummage through what I already own and don't much effort anymore if I go out. I end up feeling uncomfortable the entire night. I miss the feeling of looking in the mirror and think things like, "I'll look like a cartoon next to everyone." Or my brother asking if we were deliberately trying to dress like Salt'n'Pepa. No, we weren't, but it was a compliment.

Saying Yes to Mostly ALL Social Gatherings.

The rooftop after parties are the SPOT. Sure, you may have gone to a couple of dead parties in the suburbs with 18 year olds (ugh, they were practically toddlers), but you picked yourselves up and said yes to the next opportunity. How do you all manage to finagle your way into getting people to buy you shots? Kudos on getting unfortunate looking boys with no chance of hooking up with you to buy you things like Tic Tac shots and other drinks. No shame in your game! Si Se Puede!

Hair Game On Point

Both of you take great pride in your hair. It takes about a legit 2-hour job to get it the way you want before you go out. $Cruz, you changed your hairstyle. You were never a nappy-headed girl--despite what mean people say. They are just hating on you because they are losing their hair and mask it by wearing stupid newsboy caps. But I digress. You look totally bomb.

Of course since I am from the future, there are some things I need to warn you about. Things such as, "New Year's Face", asking ugly boys if they could act like your boyfriend or if your dress is too short. But don't worry, I'll save all of my warnings for another open letter. For now, keep your chins up. Life will straighten out if you just work hard and try your best. And Marb$, don't you dare lose your dancing shoes. They don't call your alter-ego, Linda, for nothin'. Watching Robyn on Saturday Night Live reminded me of you. Robyn is your spirit animal. The whole performance is so Marb$.

XOXO,

The Future Marb$ and $cruz

Mindless Behavior

2011-12-18T23:41:00.000-08:00

On days off of work I really enjoy a nice dish of Maury with a side of 106 and Park. I will forever be a 15 year old black girl in some way or another. That being said, the other day I channel surfed over to BET right in time to catch the video for "Girls Talkin' Bout" by Mindless Behavior. I was already a "fan" of this little kid group, they are the singers of "Mrs. Right" ft. Diggy Simmons. But this particular video I saw the other day captivated me hardcore. How are these children so cool?!?! This video is insane and the song is super catchy.

I just researched (for blog purposes, not creep purposes) their ages: 14! They were born in 1997?!!? They were born after "Friends" had been on the air for 3 years. I can't even compute that in my mind.

Watch the video, it's amazing. The fro kid is my favorite. I hope that in 10 years we can hang out...

East Side Delicatessen

2011-12-18T23:18:00.000-08:00

When food becomes an experience in one's life, you know it's amazing. A friend of mine randomly busted out the most delicious smelling meatball sub. I asked her where she got it: East Side Deli. I banked that place in my mind. My first time eating one of their sandwiches (I had to try the meatball sub) was insane. So good! A 6 inch sub is the size of a small baby, so you get a lot for your money.

I almost freaked out when I discovered an East Sub location near work. I had to MMS the shit out of that to tell la Marb$. I've tried a few different subs since my first meatball extravaganza. This place is so delicious I've been on he hunt for some good sandwiches and I've found a winner!

Locations:

4823 N. Lombard

Portland, OR 97203

4626 SE Hawthorne

Portland, OR 97215

1438 S.W. Park Ave.

Portland, OR

Cake Hats

2011-12-10T14:53:00.000-08:00

For my birthday, I would really like one of these. Maybe the blue, lime green, or pink one. The blue is one is the fiercest. It's appropriate for my life. Human unicorns deserve this kind of headwear. These are the kinds of things that make me awesome

You can find these delectable hats here on Agent Lover's blog!

Anybody Wife Shopping?

2011-12-05T23:26:00.000-08:00

I had $20 in my wallet to buy some "keep me alive" items at the grocery store. I took a look at what I had thrown in my portion of the basket. Could I be more of an ideal domestic catch? Got some coffee creamer, some Ramens, black beans, and an avacado and some shredded cheese. I'm like a single bachelor.

Whenever Marb$ or I do anything that is completely the opposite of what we think dudes find attractive, we simply say "Anybody Wife Shopping?" An example you ask? For instance, hours ago I was throwing spicy flavored pretzels one at a time like dog treats to her as I ate some while laying down. Also, Marb$ really flexed the 5 second rule. Cute babes.

Brown Dudes in Vintage Styles = Delicious

2011-12-05T22:55:00.000-08:00

My heart was swarming with butterflies when I found out that Aaron Diaz was going to be on one of my new fav shows, Pan Am. I was having a hybrid Brown Girl/American Girl moment! Telenovelas + 60's vintage clothes+ English = A very Happy Marb$. I hope you can all understand my gibberish with the plus signs and the slashes. I don't know how else to express myself. If we were conversing about this subject in person, I'd squeal with such joy you'd think there were a tea kettle in the room. "EEEEEE!!"

Aaron Diaz, wife me up already!

More chulo goodness...

And just because I love his hair so much in this:

Diego Luna also stars in Katy Perry's latest video, "The One That Got Away." Of course I watched it because I am a ride or die Diego Luna. Forever. Even when he was super duper chubby in El Premio Mayor...but I digress.

Hey guapo, don't be shy!

I love this picture below...

I watched the video and I was...sad. It made me very sad. Watch for yourselves (click here) Damn you, Katy Perry!

After all of these pictures, I agree with Uncle Jesse.

Don't worry Gael, we still think you are pretty fierce. Best looking trans-indivudal that I have ever seen.

Simple Things

2011-12-02T12:39:00.001-08:00

Strawberry Mojitos, uh ya. Delish.

Hubers

411 SW 3rd Ave
Portland OR 97204

Marb$ & $cruz Convo: Drop Dead Diva

2011-12-01T00:16:00.000-08:00

Guilty. We admit it now. We enjoy this cheesy/mindless show. I like it because it's so over the top (musical numbers, souls possessing other bodies, etc). We really don't have to use our brains when watching it. It's like eating candy! Here, me and $cruz converse about the show via text. We text each other when we are in our own rooms...we're so lazy.

Oh, Larry Craig! (Click here to read the scandal and fully understand this conversation)

Robin Thicke: Love After War

2011-11-29T22:13:00.000-08:00

IHST is a huge fan of Robin Thicke. We have a history of fanaticism. That voice is like butter and that swag is outta control. OUTTA CONTROL! His new video features his real-life wife, Paula Patton. Insert really upset emoticon :(

They're both so pretty it hurts. They have also been together since they were 15 years old. Crazy! That kind of commitment is frightening. But for Robin Thicke, I'd tattoo "Property of Robin Thicke" on my lower back. That's real love.

Can we just talk about this look? The hair! I love his hair! Mr. Thicke makes that bright, preppy, sunshine yellow sweater WORK. Those sunglasses are classic as well. I'd settle for his clone!

Remember kids, this beauty of a man was brought to you by the one and only...

Get outta here Mike Seaver, you are the opposite of swag.

Frank Ocean

2011-11-29T21:35:00.001-08:00

I can't stop listening to anything Frank Ocean has touched (I found the Bieber cover in a Frank Ocean music scouting sesh). But he for real is super talented and is providing a different kind of dynamic to R&B. He brings a whole different energy. And yes, it's true...there was a full on Twitter war between Frank Ocean and Chris Brown. I'm confused by this, I don't know how to feel.

It's interesting when you hear Frank Ocean's music, you wouldn't associate him with the alternative Hip Hop Collective "Odd Future" (i.e. the collective Tyler the Creator is also in). Yet, it works cuz Tyler the Creator (from what I've seen/heard) is hella random and pretty funny (has loads of horrible lyrics...but I'm not fanning him).

He has yet to put out a full album, he's created a mixtape and an EP, but I'm sure that first album will be epic!

Swim Good

She (Tyler the Creator & Frank Ocean) (danger, bad words)

Thinking About You (un-Justin Bieber-ed)

And just because...

Real Housewives vs. Basketball Wives

2011-11-29T21:02:00.001-08:00

I can't help it, reality TV + "housewives" makes good entertainment.

I must express to the blog who is cool and who is not cool in the eyes of $cruz. I'm doing you a favor.

Bravo's Real Housewives

Cool Real Housewives: Beverly Hills, New Jersey, Atlanta

Lost Steam Housewives: Orange County

Not Cool Real Housewives: Washington DC, Miami

Never Watched: New York

Best Housewife: Caroline Manzo, New Jersey

Each city has it's own unique vibe, the cities themselves add another element to the show. For example, New Jersey is full of Italian fams, Beverly Hills is full of plastic faces and huge ass houses, Atlanta is full of wigs. I can't stop the madness!!!

VH1's Basketball Wives

Cool Real Housewives: Second season on of the original show, this brought in Tami!

Not Cool (I tried): Basketball Wives: LA

The Best: The Reunion shows!

Best Basketball Wife: Shaunie O'Neal, boss bitch!

The start of the second season of Basketball Wives found it's footing, these beezys are almost insane and so "mean girls" that it rules. They mesh well, they have good epic fights and makeups. I have to say that Evelyn and Jennifer remind me of Marb$ and me when we're super bitchy to people for no reason but to entertain our own lives. Guilty!

My Eyes! My Eyes!

2011-11-29T20:40:00.001-08:00

Eyes are windows into one's soul, unless you're me because I've been told I have no soul behind my eyes (hence the term coined by La Marb$: Salvi Eyes). Regardless of my emotionless eyes, I like to keep them pretty! Here are my new go to eye UREA (area) enhancers:

1. Urban Decay's Naked Palette, it's mine!

Thanks 26th birthday, Naked Palette you belong to meeeee (*insert Taylor Swift song here). You can do a butt load of eye looks with this little puppy, but my go to everyday natural look includes the color Buck. It's a perfect brown shade that gives the crease just a little bit of life.

2. L'Oreal's Voluminous Million Lashes

This is a great drugstore mascara. It's super not clumpy and keeps my lashes soft.

3. CoverGirl and Olay's Simply Ageless Concealer

I usually use my under eye concealer by Clinique, but it's pretty thick. I'm saving it for more nighttime looks. I've never purchased anything for age...but turning 26 I turned a new leaf. Why not!?! This concealer is super creamy and gives my eyes a boost for the day.

Marb$, Where You Be At?

2011-11-28T22:59:00.000-08:00

Where shall I begin? I fell off ya'll. I'm sorry. I know that sorry does not suffice, but it's a start. It feels like most of my posts begin with some sort of apology. Like $cruz explained, we've been busy. I love my job and so I'm quick to stay late. Unfortunately, I've also been bombarded with personal issues, and my job became an easy escape. My bad, yo, my bad.

Let's get back into the swing of things and get reacquainted. I know it will take a while to earn back your trust, but I'll start with sharing things that I have been enjoying. My soul didn't completely die and I do have some things I still heart...and hate. In no hierarchal order:

Jay-Z Pandora...Can I Get a WHAT, WHAT?!(I'm reciting the edited version because I'm classy and shit). I have rekindled my love for Jay-Z. That girl below with the flute? No, she's not Harry Potter's butch looking sister, it's me as a 14-year old! Marb$ loved herself some Jay-Z, marching band, and Hello Kitty. What a cutie.

Tarte Eyelash Curler- I splurged on this eyelash curler. Stamp of approval and it doesn't feel like a device used for punishing others. Buy here.

2-inch Memory Foam for my bed. Since we've last spoken, I have turned into a little bit a viejita. Nothing makes me happier than a good nights sleep in a comfy bed. My dad bought this for me and I am ever so grateful! CLICK HERE for more info

Reading is tight. I'm reading No One Belongs Here More Than You by Miranda July right now. I'm pretty sure she delved into my somewhat demented brain to write this book. Remind me to turn it in on time so I don't get fined by the Multnomah County Library. I feel like a monster every time I turn in a book late.

Wine. Specifically, white wine. If I'm going down, I'm taking you down too, $cruz. That's right, your hard alcohol loving friends now enjoy wine. Ay, miralas, muy chingonas con su wine. I gained a taste for wine after attending SEVERAL weddings over the past two summers. Six of them to be exact. $cruz had to acquire the taste due to her after hours work duties. Boss bitches drink wine, and we had to get accustomed to it. I'll drink red wine, but it just reminds me of church. Wakala.

This is our actual damage. Real talk.

My clothing rack from Ikea used to be tight....until it fell apart. No, I didn't take this picture at a weird angle. This is the actual rack, I've just been too lazy/busy to do anything about it. That's what I get for buying a clothing rack for $10. I'm such a cheap ass, and sometimes, it catches up with me.

These are my confessions...

2011-11-18T22:50:00.001-08:00

I think I'm meant to be a tween or a 70 year old woman. That being said...this Just Bieber cover of Frank Ocean's "Thinking About You" is too good to turn down. The original Frank Ocean song is pretty as well, but the Biebs is starting to sound like a little hombre. Don't lie and say this isn't pleasant sounding to your ears...

Oh ya Jaden Smith is in the song too. But he's not Willow, so I don't care. The Biebs should have recruited Diggy Simmons instead...just sayin.

Fall TV 2011: Hits & Miss

2011-11-16T00:07:00.001-08:00

The IHST headquarters (our casa) has cable...not only cable but we have DVR and On Demand, so basically we like to live like queens. This "treat" has come into our lives and I don't know how I lived before. After a hard day at work, it's so nice to come home and just watch TV. I have no shame.

I don't dedicate myself to too many shows (I'm usually a reality TV junkie...like put it in my veins status), but I like a few scripted shows here and there. I must rave and un-rave about what I found for this new season. I'm happy to see female driven comedies...

1. The New Girl-Tuesdays @ 9pm on FOX

This show owes Marb$ money, because it's basically her life in a sitcom. It has moments of $cruz, the "weird" girls in general. I was a little hesitant about this show because Zooey Deschanel wasn't really my favorite actress nor singer. I thought she was the "indie" Pamela Anderson and had too much hype. But geeeee was I wrong, this show is hilarious and Zooey Deschanel is perfect in her role as Jess. It's fun to watch. It's the younger voice of the Liz Lemons of the world. So in my book, this show is a HIT for me!

2. Up All Night-Wednesdays @ 8pm on NBC (Moving to Thursdays in Jan 2012)

I follow anything Will Arnett does, how can I not!?! I never had time to watch this show when it first came on, I forgot which day and time it was on. So one epic Friday night, I went on a Hulu binge and caught up. I was rooting for this show...I mean it has Maya Rudolph as well. So I had high hopes. Luckily, the show is hilarious. It's refreshing to see Will Arnett as a nice dad dude and not an arrogant deep voiced semi-bad guy. This show's concept seems like it can burn out quickly, but they do a good job at creating depth and super funnies. According to Marb$ I'm the Maya Rudolph character Ava and I secretly agree with her. A HIT for me as well!

3. 2 Broke Girls-Mondays @ 8:30pm on CBS

I tried watching this show. The series was created by the Sex and the City dude, and had potential with some funny writers. But laugh track CBS sitcoms are tired. I don't like when the laugh track is suppose to prompt me to laugh! I'm so new school, I'm so over the classic sitcom format. So I tried, but not into this show. A MISS for me.

26...I'm 26

2011-11-15T23:51:00.001-08:00

$cruz and Marb$ have not been captured for ransom. We are alive and army crawling through life. We have been suuuuper busy with work and life, we pretty much have had zero time to sit down and craft our IHST art. It's tough, but we still got mad love...we're trying!

I celebrated my 26th birthday last week. I can't believe I turned 26. When I was 15 I thought 26 was 100 years old. It's surreal, I thought I'd have my shiz more together. But overall I'm happy to start a new year and work toward all my goals (this does not include babies).

And to really show you how mature I am...I vocally expressed interest in that I wanted a pillow pet. This isn't Snuggie-gate 2009. I legit wanted one. Soooo what did La Marb$ get me?!? A lion Pillow Pet. We named him Simbathy, yes I said WE.

SIMBATHY!!!

I like to snuggle with him hardcore because he has no heartbeat and feelings. It's amazing!

Socially Unacceptable Halloween Costumes.

2011-10-18T21:43:00.000-07:00

I'm 25 years old this year, which means that I am a grown ass woman and I make ALL my decisions (including dying my hair teal, dad). When it comes to Halloween costumes, I'm torn between a, "hot" costume, and keeping it real. It's not like I consider myself to be gorgeous or a Kim Kardashian Jr., but I don't want to be a total nerd. Even though secretly, these are the costumes I want to wear:

1.) La Chilindrina from El Chavo del Ocho.

I made the mistake of telling one of my guy friends that I wanted to be the iconic Chilindrina. He (and I am quoting word for word) said, "Why? Don't you want to be sexy?"

2). Crashdown Waitress from the show Roswell

One day, I will try to make this get-up, and Stefanie will have no choice but to join me. This will happen one day, probably in our 30's. I'll even take her measurements in her sleep if I have to. This show ruled our early teen years, and we have to pay tribute. HAVE TO.

3). Prince- Purple Rain Era

There's no explanation needed. Just know that I would be so down for the facial hair too.