So, please, when you’re making perfect moves by pretending a pair of hula hoops are prostitute earrings, remember that you were once a know-nothing, beginning long form student.

Maybe it’s because listening to Thriller is one of my earliest memories of really digging music. Singing along and doing my best MJ dancing impression was something me and my friends would do while the Thriller vinyl was spinning on my Holly Hobbie record player. I have no idea why my record player was a Holly Hobbie record player but it was. From Sears.

I mean, what kid in the 80s didn’t love Michael Jackson? I stared longingly at the red zippered jacket at the mall. I wanted the sparkly glove. I wanted to go to Neverland Ranch…before we knew about all that other business.

Maybe it’s because his death marks the first death of a childhood icon thus reminding me of my own mortality and the end of an era. Death comes for everyone, even the highly talented yet royally screwed up ones. Michael had his problems, but his impact on our culture is huge.

I bet Weird Al is grateful for Beat It.

Click to play

In this installment Mississippi’s Finest Actor, Kary Rogers, takes you through essential techniques for acting on film.

See previous MSFA video here

The show should start in about 15 minutes. I’m bored standing here so I thought I’d use the wordpress app on my phone that I’ve only used once before.

Salame!

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Well, I had completely forgotten about it until last week when I received an email from NBC.com. Glancing at it, I thought it might be for Conan tickets since I had emailed for those recently. But no, it was for SNL! I’ll be going to the Feb 7th dress rehearsal. I’m sooooo excited^

A few days later, I received an email that I had tickets for a Feb 17th taping of Conan too. He’s wrapping up his New York show and moving to LA to take over the Tonight Show, so I’ll get to see one of the last shows. I can’t hide it!

But.

That’s not the entire truth. I haven’t told you why I moved. Or rather, why I had to move.

See, Mississippi has the honor of being the fattest state in the nation and is currently trying to improve its image. To that end it is trying a two-pronged approach. One: there is a expansive movement to educate and motivate people to eat right and exercise. An example of this is the Let’s Go Walkin’ Mississippi campaign. If you live in Mississippi, you can’t help but be inundated with TV and radio ads touting the benefits of walking. But, there is a lesser-known, second approach to improving Mississippi’s standing in the health statistics.

If you’re over a certain BMI, your name goes into a lottery drawing. Once a month they draw a certain number of names and these names have 6 months to move to a state with a lower obesity rate. The thought behind this is that Mississippi’s numbers are instantly improved and the other state’s numbers are worsened in one fell swoop.

Pretty shrewd, ain’t it?

Well, my name came up so I’m doing my part to make Mississippi healthier and pull New York down. Now you know. Which is totally half the battle.

I think you already know most of mine but without further ado, we here at IMKH will hit the highlights of ‘08.

January: I think I got a new pair of shoes.
February: I..uh…I’ll come back to this one.
March: If I remember it right, I had heard gas was three cents cheaper across town so I headed over there only to find out it was the same price as my side of town. Oh man!
June: High dive. Dong exposure. Small children crying. That’s all I’m saying.
September: Uh…pass.
Octo…

Forget it. Nothing really happened in ‘08 with our country or for me personally worth mentioning. Here’s hoping 2009 takes an upswing. Maybe I’ll finally get that navy blue blazer I’ve been wanting.

And here it is again a couple of weeks ago after our first snow storm.

You know what? Everything I had heard is completely wrong.

Back home you tend to know just about everyone around town. It’s not uncommon to be out and around town while someone driving along will see you and give you a friendly honk. Etiquette dictates that you return it with a friendly nod and a wave. This is about the only time you hear a car’s horn.

Imagine my surprise while walking down 34th street and every other car is giving me a friendly honk. They tend to lay on the horn a little more than they do back home but that’s probably because there’s a lot going on around me and I may not notice them honking right away. So I turn their way and give them the required nod and wave. I tell ya, I can’t walk two feet before having to stop and wave at someone. It’s great everyone is so friendly but it takes me twice as long as it should to walk a single block.

So let it be said that New Yorkers are way friendlier than you might have heard. So much so that I have trouble sleeping at night while they honk a little hello to all their friends.