Do not let me be,
too late by your side,
running past the shoes,
you hastily cast aside.
Stuttering on the cobblestones,
stumbling through the naked streets,
mind entangled like your legs,
frantic thoughts in feverish heats.
Do not let me be,
too late by your side,
slipping on the blood,
as stone and feet collide.
And there along a cliff I see,
your soul all worn, and deathly wet.
the wind drops silent, like the birds,
as time falters, broken, unset.
Do not let me be,
too late by your side,
to hold and caress,
and hope that you see…
I take no account,
of a long, sordid past,
when I call in the street,
to a far humbler caste.
You were standing in the market,
when you heard someone calling,
an account you couldn’t settle,
and the awful darkness swelling.
(and so you ran)
Do not let me be,
too late by your side,
to hold and caress,
and hope to provide…
Long have I walked these pastures,
to work and weathered hands…
And now to go before you,
to tread the golden lands.
(to be continued)
]]>And the artifice is gone, and nothing is all that’s left…
I miss not having gone to church with you,
and an afternoon nap where we didn’t have to say a word…
I miss seeing your sleeping form,
as I stay up late polishing a project and smiling to myself…
I miss never knowing the closeness,
that you and I have needed so much…
And being alone now makes it clear, that being surrounded isn’t the same, as being near you…
I miss listening to music,
and dancing to a song that makes me want to cry…
I miss the things we might have done,
the places we could have gone, the food we would have eaten…
I miss you, and wonder…
will you ever miss me?
When I loved you, and you loved him,
the world so sweetly calm,
the pain just starting, slowly building,
tuning for the dirge and psalm…
When I loved you, and you loved him,
and nothing could go on,
I had to resign, to thoughtless grief,
and find another song…
When you loved him, and I loved naught,
the quaking, beating drowned,
silent heart and muddled tears, and there I was,
laying dead upon the ground.
They ask me,
interfere,
intrude,
and wonder.
Painful to remember,
recall,
relive,
and rekindle.
A single face,
loved,
lost,
and hated.
Yet it’s there,
still,
stubborn,
and silent.
Waiting for me,
waned,
withdrawn,
and remembered.
Long since late nights, and cups of tea,
and memories of tears, but we let them be.
Perhaps content in mere retrace,
of cashmere lines and casualness,
but never recall the damp disgrace,
or listen for signs of tenderness.
We’ve left the ocean, the endless sea,
to forget the ever dredged debris.
Long time since we were both together,
hunkered down and snug as friends.
Must we now discuss the weather,
idle gossip, and our coffee blends?
as the trees bud,
and bloom,
and leaves grow
dark and green.
I find the longer days,
are feeling short.
and the eyes are hanging dull.
and as the traffic flows,
and ebbs and weaves.
and coats are welcomed,
yet again.
a bad day,
maybe a year.
oh the trials, and woes, and pains.
surely a person grows,
digs deep.
their will strengthened,
and arms holding fast.
a bad day,
perhaps just in my head,
and so, never ending.