iBLOGthere4iM

Michigan Highways

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 14:12:31 GMT

Who took it the worst because of the massive problems in the Michigan auto-industry? How about the Michigan I-75 going south from Detroit to Toledo. It was bump-bump-bump-bump-bump for the entire hour. I've always considered Michigan highways to be some of the worst I've driven. Now they are officially ahead of the Pittsburgh and Buffalo.

I'm a Believer. I just don't Believe THIS.

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 01:35:58 GMT

I love the Monkeys, but this video makes Milli Vanili and Ashlee Simpson look awesome.

Marketing Isn't Hard

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 16:17:42 GMT

Marketing isn't really that difficult. I've been marketing my websites for years with simple well-known techniques; good customer service, tell people, biz cards, etc. It's worked very well for me. Guess how many times I've head people say that they don't have my marketing or SEO skills? Too many! And I can't convince them that I'm not doing much they don't already know.

Today, was a reminder of just how much people don't try. I got pamplete in the mail for a local Brampton restaurant called The Chicken Place. I assumed it was new and wanted to check-it-out. I looked for an address or map on the pamplete. I couldn't find one. I was surprised. I decided to check their website (http://www.chickenplace.ca/). No address or map. The website was just a copy of their pamphlete. No address. How many people are gonna call for directions? Nobody. The pamphlete will be thrown in the garbage 5 seconds after the customer realizes there's no map or directions. I did a Google maps search and bingo, there it was, along my 7km run path. And then I remembered the restaurant. It's been there for years and I've never once entered.

It doesn't take a genius to know that your restaurant's pamphlete should include a map and address. Not just a map. Not just an address. Both! If you own a restaurant and are creating a pamphlete, then simply look at ten other restaurant pamphletes and copy their ideas. Get the basic covered. That's marketing. It's easy! It's not hard. Well, unless you don't try.

Jon less Kate plus 8

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 12:14:59 GMT

My wive's favorite show is Jon and Kate Plus 8. In order to maximize the amount of time I spend with her, I occasionally have to watch this show; which isn't horrible, but I'd never volunteer to watch it. I've been hearing that Jon is looking to divorce her and is cheating on her. I was always surprised that he put up with that B_T_H. She's a horrible person, at least on TV. I would've divorced her after the first episode I watched. Go Jon!

Swine Flu Scare

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 01:29:11 GMT

The current Swine Flu scare is proof enough to me that media and government have no perspective. We are putting massive amounts of effort (medical, media, government) behind a type of influenza that has killed less than 200 people worldwide. Put that in the scale of the hundreds of thousands of influenza deaths and on occasion MILLIONS that occur annually. The death-rate of Swine Flu is no better or worse than regular old Flu that we've all had from time-to-time. The authorities scare us with big words like mutation. I know we have to track viruses and virus mutations, as the worse case scenario is possible, however likely implausible. We don't need to scare everybody with possibilities. I think the media should be required to mention that 200 deaths from H1N1 is nothing compared to the millions of influenza viruses that occur rather regularly on our planet. Let's get some perspective on this. Focus on the medicine and less focus on scaring the shit out of everybody for what is likely nothing.

If the U.S. hog industry wants to blame someone for reduced pork sales, then blame CNN and MSNBC.

DEADLINE post-it stop motion

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 16:19:14 GMT

via TechLifeWeb.

Thanks Government Again!

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 02:04:02 GMT

Watching the NHL Stanley Cup finals, they've shown a localsknow.ca commercial over-and-over-and-over. I've tried the website a few times now and it's never worked. I also noted that they don't even appear to be indexed properly by any of the top search engines. The website is, of course, run by our government of Canada. More of my tax money straight down the drain. Stanley Cup finals commercials can't be that cheap, the website is down and no basic SEO. Pathetic.

Thanks Governments

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 16:51:51 GMT

I just wanted to thank the leaders of Canada and the US for encumbering us tax payers with massive debt by unsuccessfully trying to keep Chrysler and GM from bankruptcy. Your complete failure has added billions to our national debts. F-U! I will never vote for any a-hole that supported this crap. And readers, if you do vote for any of these morons, then you lose the ability to complain about high taxes. Else you are simply a hypocrit.

Blackeye is Red!

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 14:18:33 GMT

This morning, I woke up with a mostly red-eye.

Blackeye! Coloring!

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 00:29:35 GMT

The blackeye is gaining color.

Catch Dad! Blackeye!

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 21:19:15 GMT

My son wanted to play catch today. We got the gloves out and threw the baseball around. He was doing rather well, until he decided to throw the ball at me when my back was turned. My luck. I turned at the last second and took it square in the eye. I hope it doesn't get much worse.

Funny Auto-Reply

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 17:29:44 GMT

I sent an email to a friend today and got the following out of the office auto-reply. Too funny not to share.

"I will be out of the office until 2038, at which time I will return to collect my pension. :)"

Fun at the Intersection!

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Thu, 28 May 2009 21:09:44 GMT

I'm waiting to turn left at an intersection. The light is red. We get the advanced green. The first car isn't really paying attention and so nobody goes thru the intersection for the first few sections of the green. Someone honks. The car takes off like a shot, but barely makes it thru the intersection before it turns yellow. Only 2 cars made it into the intersection before the yellow. Another 2 cards made it into the intersection before the red. Three more cards go thru a blatant red light, likely in frustrations.

Waiting now for the next advanced green..........

There it is. The first car isn't paying attention. The honk goes off, 2 cars thru the green, 2 cars thru the yellow and 3 more cars go thru a blatant red.

Two Little Boys

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Thu, 28 May 2009 13:38:11 GMT

Two little boys, ages 8 and 10, were excessively mischievous. They were always getting into trouble and their parents knew all about it. If any mischief occurred in their town, the two boys were probably involved. The boys' mother heard that a preacher in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys.

The preacher agreed, but he asked to see them individually. So the mother sent the 8 year old first in the morning, with the older boy to see the preacher in the afternoon.

The preacher, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him sternly, 'Do you know where God is, son?'

The boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there wide-eyed with his mouth hanging open.

So the preacher repeated the question in an even sterner tone, 'Where is God?'

Again, the boy made no attempt to answer. The preacher raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy's face and bellowed, 'Where is God?'

The boy screamed and bolted from the room, ran directly home and dove into his closet, slamming the door behind him. When his older brother found him in the closet, he asked, 'What happened?'

The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied, 'We are in BIG trouble this time,'

'GOD is missing, and they think we did it.'

Truly an inspirational story

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Sun, 24 May 2009 04:30:41 GMT

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University ...

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man. Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing, and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same fucking elephant. This is for everyone who sends me those heart-warming bullshit stories.

22 is the Way to Failure

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Fri, 22 May 2009 18:07:55 GMT

I've always been amazed by how many business fail because they adopt a catch-22 strategy. This is strategy where you continue down a path of failure because you believe any other path also leads to failure.

My prime example was a friend who use to build and sell his own computers from his basement. He couldn't make money at his asking price, but he refused to increase prices because he didn't think he'd sell any computers at a higher price. After working his ass off and losing money for years, he closed shop. He had no chance of succeeding because he thought any other path was also doomed.

I often bring this to the attention of business owners and although they admit this strategy is doomed, they swear it's the only thing to do in their situation. Their situation is somehow special. They inevitably fail too!

Closing Car Dealerships

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Wed, 20 May 2009 14:52:36 GMT

It's quite apparent to me now, that our economies and big companies around the world are being run by complete idiots. The major initiative of Chrysler and GM of late, is to announce the closing of dealerships. Let's make it clear. There is no cost saving to Chrysler or GM when they close a dealership. Those are mostly independently run businesses (franchises) that pay their own employees, rents, etc. Closing those dealerships only reduces retail space, which translates directly to lower sales. Now, in many cases, Chrysler and GM actually pay for some assets on behalf of those dealerships and there can be some cost savings by being able to close those payments (often mortgage like) while in bankruptcy. Why not simply transfer those liabilities to the dealerships and let them survive? Possibly with reduced profits, but at least they keep the retail space open and employees employed. By closing dealerships, Chrysler and GM is only guaranteeing further reduced sales.

I have to wonder if some brilliant politicians are pushing Chrysler and GM to close dealerships. I think our current economy is proof that governments needs to realize they don't know how to run a business. Several months ago, Chrysler and GM could have went bankrupt. Instead, our governments gave them money to keep them out of bankruptcy. That only prolonged the inevitable. Chrysler is already in bankruptcy and GM is hot on their heals. Now, instead of Chrysler emerging from bankruptcy with zero debt, they will be sadled with repaying the government loans. We simply made the problem worse.

Hockey Parents are Nuts

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Fri, 15 May 2009 08:29:15 GMT

I'm continually amazed just how far parents and coaches are willing to go to win an Atom house league hockey game. This last week, a coach brought in a AA ringer who scored 7 goals and dominated the game. When I found out, I nearly flipped. It's 8-10 year old recreational hockey. It's a fun league where every team makes the finals, no matter their record. What possesses this coach to pull a stunt like this? Is he worried about his coaching record? Maybe Brian Burke is in the stands looking for good coaches? Instead of a fun competitve game, it turns into a route 15-4. I'm sure the coach's son is on the team. He taught his son to win at all cost. Cheat. Forget integrity and sportmanship.

Revenue Canada Pays

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Thu, 14 May 2009 13:57:47 GMT

Just to prove how stupid our Canadian government is, some companies have been overpaying their tax deposits because Revenue Canada pays interest on those overpayments and their interest rate is much high than anything you can get on the free market.

The ShamWOOHOO!

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Wed, 13 May 2009 00:42:50 GMT

Gotta love YouTubers.

Death Star annihilates the Enterprise

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Tue, 12 May 2009 14:05:01 GMT

Awesome!

via BoingBoing.

Define Incompetence

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Mon, 11 May 2009 16:02:56 GMT

Let me try to define incompetence. Everybody screws up. Screwing up isn't incompetence, rather it's being human. Incompetence is when you screw something up, are told how not to screw it up, you agree you won't screw it up again and you still screw it up again.

Incompetence is somewhat malicious. You know someone will be upset if you screw it up again and you fail to do what is necessary to get it right. Maybe you were too busy with something else (getting home early on Friday) or just too lazy to take the time.

The nice thing about recessions is that incompetent people are sometimes the first to get fired. Unless, of course, the incomp smokes or plays hockey with the VP.

The Hunt for Gollum

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Wed, 06 May 2009 22:17:46 GMT

This is awesome, especially consider it is independently produced by fans. I've only watched the previews. Can't wait to watch the entire thing.

Trailer 2 - The Hunt For Gollum [2]
by HuntForGollum

Hockey is for Kids

randy@kbcafe.com (Randy Charles Morin) — Mon, 04 May 2009 16:48:50 GMT

I don't think any kids hockey organization quite understands what they are saying when they say that the hockey is for the kids. IMHO, it's lip service. Meanwhile, I'm coaching a house league team in a spring league and we got defeated 27-0 because the league allowed multiple AAA and AA players to play in their house league level division. BTW, the other game was 9-0. You can imagine that the kids did not like playing those games, but worse, they have to play a similar team next week. It's not gonna be fun. I talked to the league and they were aware of that two teams with multiple REP players were playing in a league against REC players and they did nothing about it and didn't care. The feel no remorse for allowing this to happen. In the end, they get 24 kids that no longer want to play hockey because it's humiliating. Once my kid completes the season, I will write a humiliating review of the league, which I'll SEO to the top of Google and they will know how the kids feel. F'ed with the wrong person.