Id Rather Be Blogging

Patience Is a Virtue

2012-05-09T21:30:00.001-05:00

Just blocks away from my office at the hospital are both a thrift store and an antique store. So when I feel the burning need to ~~spend some money~~, stretch my legs and get some fresh air, I take a walk over to shop during my lunch hour; a routine I've run for months. Last fall whilst in the antique shop, I spied a small funky black and gold colour stapler sitting BEHIND the cash desk. It was beautiful and I thought it would look great in my new vintage art studio so I asked and was informed it wasn't for sale.

Rats.

Over the next six months, every time I went in, I saw that stapler.... still sitting there calling my name. I inquired every single time if it was for sale yet (as it always seemed to be someone different working that day). Each time, the same answer. No. I even left my business card in case the owner ever decided to sell it.

I never got a call.

Because it was such a glorious Spring day today, I again tore my blurry eyes from my computer screen and walked over to the antique store. Again, I was greeted by yet another person working there. I found three antique wooden sewing table drawers, but they weren't priced. So I asked her how much, and she said to just make an offer. I offered and she accepted, $ 15 for all three. Awesome!

While she rang me up, again I spotted that same black stapler; still sitting in the same protected spot behind the till. I asked my question yet again, expecting the same old response. Except this time, I realized SHE was the owner! She said it could be for sale, and to make an offer.

"I'll give you $20 for it!" I couldn't believe my luck when she responded with, "Well, it's been a really slow day and I am in a good mood. SOLD!"

Yipee!!! It was FINALLY MINE! After months and months (and months) of yearning for that beautiful piece, I finally had it. Isn't it cool???

When I got back to the office, I still had a few minutes, so I decided to check online to see how old it was. I thought it was a vintage piece... but no, it was modern. Oh well, I thought. I hope I didn't pay too much for it! So I checked eBay.

Holy crap.

23 Kt GOLD????? No way. But even if this guy had already sold three... it COULDN'T be worth $100 more than I paid for it. Could it?

I checked Amazon.

Holy crap again.

Checked some more.

Holy crapoly...

I sourced the company... yep. 23 Kt GOLD alright. A Spanish stapler that is considered to be the finest in the world.

I have a freakin' GOLD stapler.

For 20 bucks.

I even loaded it up with standard staples and it worked perfectly! I could hardly wait to get it home in my studio.

Daughter wants to melt it down for jewelry.

No way. I've waited way too long for this baby; I am going to treasure it forever and staple VERY, VERY CAREFULLY....

Baaaaaa......

2012-05-03T14:48:00.000-05:00

You may, if you've been around here for four years (Acck! Really???) seen THIS old photo at then-future-hubby's sheep farm:

Yep, it's me back in 1977.

Please ignore the hair.

C'mon... try.

And stop laughing.

It was all the rage back then. Really.

Why oh why am I ~~stupid~~ brave enough to show this image once more? Because I stumbled across THE CUTEST sheep blog ever! And being a lover of all things OMGCUTE and fuzzy (proof above), I have to pass along the addy.

So if you have a few hours to spend "Oohing" and "Awwwwing" .... please visit Blossom at "Punkin's Patch". You'll be glad you did.

And it will wipe away any memory of that hideous frizz of a hairdo above.

I hope.

A New Phone

2012-04-23T12:23:00.001-05:00

If you're like me (and my sincere condolences if you are...) you probably have gone through ~~a kajillion~~ many phones in your life. Especially after cell phones came on the scene.

From that first "brick" phone to a sleek flip model, two Blackberries and then my newest iPhone, I traded up so quickly, I swiftly acquired a drawer of telephone castoffs.

Poor castoffs! And bad me. Well, at least they are not piled in some landfill. Nope. I kept them; for what exactly, I have no freakin' idea.

So it was some trepidation that I announced to hubby that I bought yet another phone.

He looked at me with that same, oh gad, not again look.

"Really? I thought you liked your iPhone? You haven't even had it six months!"

Yeah, but this one I just got is so .... unique.

Sturdy.

Durable.

Classic design.

Comes in black too.

Only problem is, it may be a tad too big (and freakishly heavy) to fit in my purse. On second thought, if you've ever seen my ~~knapsack~~ purse, it may just tuck in after all. And that receiver can double as a lethal weapon - one swing and any attacker will be instantly rendered unconscious.

Okay, maybe I'll keep my iPhone... the games on this thing suck big time.

Remembering Titanic

2012-04-14T16:35:00.000-05:00

My fascination with Titanic has been lifelong; in 2009 daughter and I attended the Artifact Exhibition in Minneapolis, and in 2011 I took my mother, father, daughter and hubby when it came to Winnipeg.

It was an incredibly moving experience; something I shall never forget. After spending hours soaking up everything we could in the hours among pieces of the ship, reading the haunting accounts of the passengers, staff and creators of the leviathan, I made sure I came home with some of my own Titanic "artifacts". I bought a set of reproduction First Class cream and sugar, a Second Class teacup and saucer, playing cards, book and an authentic piece of Titanic coal recovered in 1994 - the funds from which help support the preservation of the RMS Titanic.

Even way back in 1987 (two years after Robert Ballard found the wreck), hubby began a model of the Titanic. Sadly, he only got as far as painting and gluing the 2 pieces of hull and stand together. I think he got frustrated because he realized he painted it incorrectly... and gave up. I bought him a second new model to start over, but he never even opened it. For 25 years, both boxes collected dust.

Until this week, with all the commemorative specials I remembered our own little Titanic, forgotten in the abyss that is his workbench in the basement. I pulled it out and was determined to finally finish it in time for today's 100th anniversary.

And I did it! (Did you notice that whilst I worked, I was kept hydrated with beverages from my Second Class White Star Line teacup?) I completed my own piece of Titanic history, which will take a place of honor in my art studio.

Finishing the model was very satisfying; and I will always remember I completed it on the 100th Anniversary of this very tragic day.

So Funny I Cried

2012-03-22T20:47:00.000-05:00

Oh

My

Gawd

It's been a long time since I have laughed so hard...

Being a fan of British humour (yes, that's with a "u" as a good Commonwealth citizen should) since first watching Monty Python and Fawlty Towers many eons ago, I absolutely cracked up when I found this today:

And every time I watch it again, I laugh even harder... till my sides hurt and I am wiping tears from my eyes.

Make sure you also read the comments... hilarious in themselves.

And check out their other videos too; a whole bunch that will have you in stitches.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go watch this again...

So Obviously I Wasn't The Best Mother...

2012-02-20T07:31:00.040-06:00

It has come to my attention, 15 years after the fact however, that apparently I was NOT a leading candidate for "Mother Of The Year" in the 90's.

For when I read the article 10 Toys That Failed

I realized that four of the 10 failures due to safety recalls were and STILL ARE in my home.

Poor daughter. I subjected her to Pokemon, dolls, toys and outdoor games that I now find out were deathtraps just waiting to spring.

I will admit these suckers are dangerous... especially in the hands of a klutz like moi. Many a time I aimed, poised and threw my lawn dart with great finesse... only to find it rocketing straight up and land with a thud mere inches BEHIND ME.

Ah the Easy Bake. I had one when I was young. It turned everything to ashes. The best thing I ever had with this set was the bubblegum. Yep, they actually made BUBBLEGUM for you to BAKE. I kid you not. After burning the first batch to a reeking, boiling tar, I found that by simply emptying the packet straight into my mouth, the "raw" gum was far better. So it only boggles the mind that I bought one for my own daughter 30 years later.

I thought these things would be the coolest toy ever. Lucky for us, after the first few "flights", the stupid thing broke. Natch. Oh well, at least it never had the chance to put an eye out.

Now THIS makes me sad. Sad because we probably collected a gazillion of these... we had so many (I think Burger King made it a set of 100 different toys, so naturally we tried to COLLECT THEM ALL). Yep, we have full "chains" of these balls all linked together in boxes somewhere under the stairs in the basement. Along with the lawn darts, an Easy Bake and a broken Sky Dancer.

Sad too that I never turned the Pokemon balls in for all those free french fries.

Wordless Wednesday: Told ya

2012-01-18T14:45:00.000-06:00

(NOTE: this is a continuation of the last post....)

Back to Normal

2012-01-08T10:51:00.000-06:00

Ah, the holidays. The time of year when everything seems to go, well, "wonky". Everything gets interrupted by special activities, special sales, special music, special decor and special meals.

Don't get me wrong ... I LOVE the holidays.

But I also love to get back to "normal" afterwards.

Normal schedules, normal activities, yup, even normal TV....

But this?

This is definitely NOT "normal" for January in Winterpeg:

"Normal" for January here is oh, about - 40 C...

And even stranger, for the first time not only am I feeding the bunnies in our yard (as documented LAST YEAR), it seems someone hasn't tucked himself away for winter hibernation yet:

The little chippy was enjoying the nuts, seeds and fruit mix I sprinkle at the tunnel opening in the snow the bunnies have made - down below that tree stump under the deck. The plump yet fastidious go-getter not only was feasting on the treats, he was er, squirreling away (because "chipmunking away" just sounds stupid) most of them in that flower pot. For every one he ate, another three or four were buried deep into his treasure trove, cleverly up out of the reach of the bunnies.

Nope, nothing around here seems normal at all yet...

Makes Me Proud to be a Winnipegger

2011-12-06T08:42:00.003-06:00

I am a Winnipegger and I love it here.

I love the snow at Christmas.

I love the parks.

I love our vast multi-culturalism.

I love our painted Polar Bear statues.

I love the graceful Canada Geese when they fill the sky each fall.

But what makes my heart soar is when someone like THIS bursts onto the scene from my hometown:

Merry Christmas Everyone!

iSad

2011-10-06T07:58:00.002-05:00

Like millions of others, Steve Jobs changed my life.

Back in the 80's, my first experience with an Apple computer was on the job here at a Univerisity-based hospital. Because we are a teaching facility, I learned computer animation programming on an $ 85,000 (yep, that's THOUSAND dollars) Apple to create a simulation for instructing nurses on how to use a new infusion pump.

It was incredibly COOL.

It made me dream of having my very own Apple, but alas, I would have to wait. And wait. And wait. The new millennium arrived and my very first Apple came in the form of my iPod. Now I could listen to my entire music library wherever I went.

It was awesomely COOL.

It was also well after we had given daughter her very own iPod, but before she received an iPod Touch for another birthday.

They were too COOL.

A few years back, I did a short talk on computing at a GE conference. One of the gifts I received was probably the smallest, but the best: an iPod Shuffle.

It was miniaturized COOL.

Then last year, I finally received my very own Apple computer. My iPad came free with my car purchase... not the reason I bought the car of course

But it was insanely COOL.

I am never without my iPad. I use it daily. It HAS changed my life -- no question. Just a few weeks ago, daughter got her very first Mac for her University Computer Science courses so she can carry on the family tradition of computer programming.

Yep, it is too COOL for school.

So thank you Steve.

Thank you for all the incredible, awesome, miniaturized, insanely too COOL tools.

Make It Stop Now!

2011-10-04T10:05:00.001-05:00

GAAA!!!!

Stop.

Please.

Go Away.

Leave me alone!

Stop knocking on my door.

Stop calling me EVERY.FREAKING.NIGHT for some psuedo "poll" you are holding just to get my name on your ~~sucker~~ voter list.

It's only been a month since it was officially called, but I am sick and tired of Election radio ads. Election TV ads. Election print ads.

So here it is Election Day in Manitoba. The day I foolishly thought the craziness would mercifully stop.

Nope. They continue, even after the polls opened. I wistfully long for the days gone by when they were ordered by law to stop the mud-slinging 24 hours in advance of the poll opening.

Oh those were the days. * Sigh *

Now I only want to vote for the people who Pissed Me Off The LEAST.

It's a close call.

However, THIS may just sway me (click to biggify):

But my only question is, shouldn't he be running for the Green Party?

My Favorite Minnesotans

2011-09-20T12:47:00.000-05:00

Well, better late than never, they always say.

Who "they" are, I haven't the foggiest, but I nevertheless agree.

As I mentioned in my previous post, (Holy crap! That was only.... YESTERDAY!) last month daughter and I once again journeyed to our favorite home-away-from-home, Minneapolis.

Yes, we shopped at the Mall of America (um, duh)

Yes, we shopped at IKEA (I always get lost...)

Yes, we shopped at Albertville (75% off is my kind of deal)

Yes, we shopped at some antique stores (natch)

And yes, we returned to the fab Minnesota Zoo to say HAI! to some of our most-favorite Minnesotans.

Since it was going to be an unbelievable 45 C with the humidity, we made sure we got there as soon as it opened at 10 am. First stop, the Grizzlies - and because we were there early, it was in fact, "Feeding Time At The Zoo".

If I were him, I would count my fingers post-munchy-mealtime. Check that. If I were him, I would be flat on my back passed out the second those huge claws hit the cage.

Now THESE little guys I could feed; however they obviously do just fine fending for themselves (lookit the tummy!) ... nom, nom, nom...

After just an hour of seeing bears, leopards, bison, deer, coyotes and even a tiger, we were sweltering. Time to head to the cool indoor exhibits. But on the way, we stumbled across a bird show that was just starting. Here's were we found the cutest owl of all in the (thank the stars) shaded ampitheatre: Hai Geezer!

He even posed with daughter. What a sweetie! He sits that way to keep cool... being an owl from South America, he LOVES the heat.

I, on the other hand, did not. So inside we ventured to Discovery Bay where we once again stumbled across a show just starting: the Bottlenose Dolphins were incredible. Then we happened upon some newcomers from whence last we visited. These Penguins were hilarious -- and way too quick to get a good clear shot of:

Now THIS kind soul had the decency to keep still during the photoshoot. I do believe he keeps still for ALL photo ops. And all day. And all night.... He looks rather proud to have the distinction of never ever having a blurry portrait, doesn't he?

Four hours zoomed by and the heat was unbearable, so we headed back to the MoA for some air-conditioned fun-ness at the newly revamped Underwater Adventures. The awesome Seahorse Exhibit never fails to amaze

as well as the bizzare JellyFish exhibit in all it's psychedelic glory

Once we were sure we had visited everyone we had come to see, we bade a fond farewell to our furry, feathery and scaley Neighbors To The South.

After all, we had more shopping to do.

Write a Blog Post

2011-09-19T12:39:00.000-05:00

So..... what have YOU been up to lately?

Oh me? Well let's see. Since I last wrote, I have been uber-busy. Yesiree... busy, busy, busy.

* Ahem *

Okay, perhaps busy with a titch of lazy.

Or, a tad busy with a more-than-admittable (okay, I know that is not a word) amount of laziness.

For anyone who cares, here's a rundown of July, August and the first half of September that seemed to rip past without me seeming to notice:

July:

- Just updated blog! Hooray! Now I don't have to feel guilty any more. Going to update more now. Definitely.

- Hmmmm.... those weeds in the backyard are getting big. Must pull them one day. Yep. Definitely. One. Of. These. Days. Alright....

- I really should update the blog again. It's been a week after all.

- First I'll update my Ewokcels.com website, THEN I'll blog. Definitely fun to geek out with Star Wars again.

August:

- Got to update blog soon.... well, when I can find the TIME, that is. Got to give the house a good cleaning first. Definitely got to do that soon.

- Ooh! More cels came! Update today -- um, the Ewok site, not the blog. Must get back to that again soon. AND visit blogs again. I miss the antics of Daisy and Harley, Tinsel and Lily, Babs and Mo, Swubird and all my online buddies listed on my Friends page.

- Oh joy! Something exciting is finally happening that I can blog about! I have to move all my craft ~~crap~~ supplies down to the basement so daughter can have her old bedroom back. I shall take lots of pictures and moan and bitch about what a chore this will be! Definitely entertaining stuff.

- Yes! Daughter and I are on vacay to Minneapolis again! I even have my laptop with me so I can post awesome photos and tell amazing stories of our adventures! Definitely will find the time to do that!

September:

- Where the heck did summer go? Well, at least my weeds are waning. The house is "clean enough". My craftroom is back in order - mostly. I have to catch up on my online friends again. Definitely got to cyber-travel, THEN update my blog.

- Holy crap! It's been months since I've last blogged.

Have to do that again sometime soon.

Definitely.

I Forgive You

2011-07-21T10:59:00.001-05:00

Each Spring, I eagerly anticipate the traditional trips to the local garden store to stock up on all my flower and veggie plants. I carefully choose (okay, maybe not THAT carefully - I usually scoop up whatever pretty thing catches my eye) plants that will survive both the full sun (we have ~~very little~~ NO shade in our back yard) and the voracious appetite of our local family of wild rabbits.

Amongst the dozens of annuals and herbs I adopt, I always snag some bright orange and yellow Marigolds; listed at the garden store to be "Rabbit - Resistant".

Obviously MY rabbits can't read.... and obviously I can't remember.

My rabbits LOVE Marigolds.

So it's not surprising that mere days after planting, I have a wonderful, neat row of Marigold stems to adore and admire whilst relaxing on the deck. Sans flowers and most of the foliage, that is.

Doh!

But I forgive the cute bunnies; they're cheap (er, the plants, not the rabbits, that is) and with a simple move of the planter to higher ground they'll grow back.

After all, the poor rabbits have been enduring weather that's been Hell On Earth as we fry in temperatures like this lately:

That's right; with the humidity, it was 117 F (47 C) out there Tuesday. After watering all my charges which were now almost as wet as I was (covered in sweat within nanoseconds), I could barely breathe before dashing back inside to stand, arms extended, in front of the air conditioner on full blast in a vain attempt to cool down.

Holy Freaking Heck.

So I not only forgive them their mischievous snacking, I put out some bowls of water along with their seeds and berry mix at the entrance of their home under our deck.

It's not like they can reach the bird bath that's been THE popular spot with our feathered friends this week; because if they figured out how to get up there, ALL my flowers and herbs would be doomed for sure.

And that would be a tad harder to forgive.

The Circle Of Life

2011-06-22T21:16:00.003-05:00

If you know me, or have been a reader for awhile, you'll know I'm an animal lover. A keeper of my very own Zoo of felines, canine, aquatic and reptilian species. I also encounter quite a few wild creatures I've been blessed to share my little piece of the world with: bunnies, geese, large birds, heck even a huge snapping turtle (this last one was posted on my old, old blog in 2006).

Previous ~~run-ins~~ exploits with Mother Nature can be found HERE or under the Category "Wildlife" under Diversions on the sidebar.

You should know I am also a terrible hypocrite. Although I could never be a vegetarian, my heart breaks when "Nature takes it's course". Heck, I hated having to put a beautiful dragonfly out of it's misery when I found it half-squashed, but still alive on the concrete the other day.

So tonight's experience is a mixture of joy and sadness.

As we relaxed in my favorite chair after dinner, both Sheba and I were startled by the cacophony of birds outside my living room window. (Of course I had a cat in my lap; there always is one or more within touching distance - as a matter of fact Dakotah is supervising this very blog entry right now). Sheba began her weird cat-chirping at them while I got up to take a closer look at the rustling pine boughs. Sure enough, two Robins were trying to attack something else in the branches of our Blue Cedar....

... and then I realized what it was.

A Falcon!

And then I realized what it was DOING.

Tear. Claw. Chomp. Gulp!

Yep. Dinnertime for the Falcon was at the table of the Robin's nest I do believe.

My heart broke for the youngster that had become a meal; but then I marveled at the majestic Falcon. Running to dig my camera out of my purse (I performed, perfectly, I might add, the old "Frantically-Turn-It-UpsideDown-And-Dump-The-Contents-Onto-The-Floor" maneuver you only see in the movies) and got back in time to take a few photos through our not-too-clean (okay, erm "filthy") window. Precariously perched atop the arm of my rocker recliner, balancing and propping myself ON the previously-stated filthy window, I zoomed in and snapped this:

Once it's meal was done, the Falcon swept out of the tree and was chased, all too late though, by the two adult Robins. I jumped off my own tenuous position and went to the laptop, Googling Peregrine and discovered the Peregrine Falcon Recovery Project here in Winnipeg.

I wrote to them and they confirmed this is in fact a Merlin Falcon - a cousin of the Peregrine which was once an endangered species in North America caused by pesticide use which was halted in the 1970s, it's now on the road to recovery thanks to organizations like the PFRP. To read more about the Project, please visit the their website too:

Peregrine Falcon Recovery Project

Even though I have a hard time accepting the "Circle Of Life", I will admit it WAS incredible to witness it in my own front yard.

I Thought It Sounded Perfect...

2011-06-09T12:21:00.002-05:00

Our city has been all-a-twitter (and ON Twitter, natch) about the recent purchase of the Atanta's Thrashers hockey team; and being a Good Canuck, I too am way-too-excited about having the NHL in our fine city once more.

Yep, I grew up watching our beloved Jets from the 70's to the 90's... and attended, with 35,000 other fans, the "Save the Jets" Rally back in 1996 in a vain attempt to prevent their sale to Phoenix. I even have a photo of daughter on hubby's shoulders that appeared on the front page of the newspaper the next day. Sure, we were not much more than a dot in a long shot amongst thousands, but I FOUND us!

Since that fateful day I like many others on too many occasions, got my hopes up just to be dashed again with rumours of our team returning, then not returning to Canada.

Then this year it really looked like it was going to finally happen. Hubby, the pessimist, wasn't so sure. Me, the optimist, followed TSN's Jets Meter online for months, watching the dial inch it's way up and up and up... until the wonderful day it was announced that Atlanta's team was sold to our Great White North (er, "True North"). Well, wonderful for us, not so much for Atlanta - with whom I could entirely empathize; we went through the exact same heart-breaking situation 15 years ago.

But now the team was bought.

The MTS Centre was sold out (13,000 multi-season packages in TWO minutes.... I sadly, was not one of the lucky purchasers... rats).

All that's left is naming the team.

Should it be the Jets to pay homage to their history? At first I agreed with a resounding OF COURSE!

But then.... I thought about it. It really wasn't the "return" of the same team, so why not start fresh?

And then I thought more about it (yes, I have WAY TOO MUCH FREE TIME). We used to be known for our famous "White Outs" at games; a tradition started here of wearing all white at special games. Wouldn't it be so cool (er, pardon the pun...) of calling the new team

THE MANITOBA BLIZZARD

Aw PERFECT!!! I am so smart!

It's a winter game. We relish the fact that we survive the extreme cold and punishing blizzards. And the best part; we could have a POLAR BEAR NAMED BLIZZARD as our mascot. Manitoba is known the world over for our Polar Bears. We even had the oldest polar bear in captivity - until Debby passed on at the ripe age of 42 in 2008.

I could just see it now; a fierce Polar Bear on the front of white and blue jerseys, with a sweep of blue like a blizzard wind behind the Manitoba name. His huge paw could even be swiping at a puck!

And think of the merchandise! Cute, cuddly little polar bears for the little fans.

Awesome furry hats for the adults.

White jerseys for the BLIZZARD WHITEOUTS!!!!

I need to contact True North, because obviously this delay means they ARE going with a new name and are just waiting for all the promotional stuff to be done to present to a waiting city....

The Manitoba Blizzard. Awesome.

Until I finally listened to that little voice in my head that whispered "it sounds familiar...."

So I Googled. And found that our Women's Junior Hockey team is named the Blizzard. So is a soccer team. A soccer team??? That's not a winter sport!

AW CRAP.

And here I thought I was soooo smart. I guess I'd better scrap my doodle of the new logo then...

Too bad -- it looked soooo cool!

Time To Put The Candy Away

2011-05-20T09:12:00.001-05:00

Some days I just have to shake my head.

Unfortunately a few weeks ago, our regular Housekeeping lady at work injured her back and has been on sick leave ever since. Suffice to say, we miss her cheery manner and great work ethic. After weeks of temporary replacements who obviously couldn't give a rat's ass about their performance, I was told a new dedicated Housekeeper had now been assigned to our floor.

Awesome! For weeks I was cleaning my office and throwing out my own garbage. No biggie really; I do it at home, so I don't mind tidying up and chucking my garbage; afterall I am the only one using the space.

Then this week, miraculously the garbage was once again cleaned out and a fresh bag stretched across my bin. Yay!

... on Monday, then again on Tuesday, once more on Wednesday... every day! What the heck? I usually only had cleaning scheduled each Tuesday night. DAILY disposal was really overkill; but I guess it was better than being totally ignored.

And then I spotted perhaps the reason my office was such a magnet for the new Housekeeper; my recently-filled candy dish had been nearly emptied overnight. In one fell swoop, my two bags of Lifesavers mints were gone, save for a few lonely pieces left to mourn the raid.

So much for the common courtesy of "help yourself to ONE or TWO".

Nope. Now it's more like "Fill your fists, pockets and backpack with as much as you can carry" attitude.

When I mentioned it to my co-workers, they weren't surprised at all. Apparently the huge jelly bean jar in the main office had been pillaged too.

*Sigh*

Well, I guess it's time to hide the candy at night.

I really don't care about a measly few dollars; but if that buggar even TOUCHES my vintage toys I keep on my desk, he's in for a whole lotta hurt.

Take my candy, but paws off my toys!

Moribund? Moribund?

2011-05-17T09:48:00.000-05:00

Has it really been 2 MONTHS?

Yep, yep, (flipping a few calendar pages....) well look at that.... so it has.

Gad.

For two months I've been "on sabattical".

Er, "on vacation".

Or perhaps simply "on the couch".

No, not on the couch... that's hubby's territory.

I've been "on the laptop".

Yes, it's been pretty quiet here because I've been busy with other things.

But definitely this blog is NOT "moribund" as one commenter asked. (Don't feel bad if you don't know what that means... I had to look it up too):

Definition of MORIBUND

1: being in the state of dying : approaching death

2: being in a state of inactivity or obsolescence

NEVER! Nevernevernever! Temporarily ignored, yes. Dead, no!

What I HAVE been doing is simultaneously getting other projects done whilst feeling utterly guilt-racked about not posting here. I am quite good at giving myself guilt-trips you know... I have honed that skill for many years.

The major project I just finished was properly organizing and cataloging a very dear collection I have had since 2004. What collection you ask? (I know you did, don't deny it). Well, some people may think it's silly, but it's an art collection.

Star Wars art to be more precise.

Yep. Star Wars. My ~~obsession~~ hobby before blogging overtook my life. If you're a long-time reader, you'll know I am a self-described geek and on a scale of 1 to 10 (ten being Uber-Geek), I am a 20. Or perhaps even approaching 21. I have a whole basement full of Star Wars toys, books, games and anything else Mr. Lucas could slap a Star Wars sticker on.

Back in 2004 the Star Wars Fan Club sent all us geeks, er "fans" original cartoon cels and drawings from the 1985/86 Ewoks Saturday morning cartoon series. Since then, I've collected hundreds of cels but sadly had them just shoved away without the proper care they deserve. So I finally got off my butt and properly sorted, photographed and archived the artwork into scrapbook binders for safe keeping. And then I built a brand new website to share it with all the other Uber-Geeks HERE.

Now that it's done, I can hopefully balance my "extra" (Ha! Like I have "extra") time amongst all my other interests.

Problem is, I have way too many "other interests". I'll just have to do a bit here, a bit there and make sure the guilt monster doesn't keep me away for such a long time ever again.

So, as Mark Twain once said "The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated".

Moribund my @$$.

Ahhhh... Technology

2011-03-04T10:23:00.000-06:00

It's been six months since I brought my new baby home. Erm, my Outlander baby that is.

And yet it still is providing me opportunities to both learn and laugh. Like discovering the numerous quirks of the GPS, satellite radio and even getting used to how the damn wipers work. How the heck can windshield wiper configurations vary so much from vehicle to vehicle? Of course my last car was near 10 years old (or "ancient" as my daughter insists) so innovations in the auto industry HAVE progressed a tad in the interim I guess.

Obviously the old Dodge Caravan never had Bluetooth.

I've finally gotten used to the voice commands it stubbornly prefers and how to be patient and wait for the "beep!" before responding, but I still ponder the irony that it can't pronounce the word "mobile".

A recent car-to-car communication (or perhaps more appropriately described as a "lack of communication") proves technology has a long way to go however.

I had just picked up daughter from a late evening University class, as her shared ride for the day had left early. Suddenly the radio mutes and the incoming call indicator light flashes on my indash screen. I pressed the pickup button on the wheel control panel, noting it's hubby's usual end-of-the-day-whaddya-want-for-dinner call.

"Hello?"

"Hello!" he responds.

"Yeah hon. What's up?" (Like I didn't know).

"Hello?" is all he says.

I try again.

"Hello?"

"Where are you?" he asks.

"I just picked daughter up from University."

"You're in an elevator?"

"No! The University! She had a late class!" Why I am yelling now, I have no idea...

"She had an accident????"

OMG.

"NO! A LATE CLASS!" Now at this point, daughter bursts out laughing in the passenger seat. Which he CAN hear. Geez. Good thing I didn't even attempt to explain how it was her friend's turn to drive that day but didn't stay for the late class...

I try to remain composed. It's harder than I thought. Daughter's laughter is contagious and I begin to giggle too. Turning off the car fan and stretching as close to the microphone as possible while still attempting to navigate the turnoff to the highway at 80 KM/hour, I try again. "Helloooooo?"

"Geez. I can't hear you very well." he offers.

Doh! Rly?

"Call me back." We can tell he's getting a tad pissed now. Oops, sorry hon, but it really is too funny at this end. Which, by the way, we can hear you perfectly.

"Okay." giggle "Will do hon." snort

So I called HIS cell, shaking my head in wonder when my Bluetooth voice asks if I want to call the "MOBEEL" number for him.

Ring, ring, ring... he picks up.

"Hello, can you hear me know?" Gad I sound just like that dorky TV guy.

"NO!" hubby responds.

Well, that did it. Full-out hysterical laughter from the daughter and I.

What? My mind tries, unsuccesfully may I add, to process the fact that he CAN hear me ask if he can hear me, but he cannot, in fact, HEAR ME. This was getting ridiculous now.

So I offer a solution. "Just call me at home. We'll be there in 10 minutes."

"Okay."

The remainder of the trip was spent in hysterics. In OUR car that is. I can imagine the converstaion he was having with himself in HIS truck.

When we finally met up at home, I had to apologise. "Sorry honey, we really weren't laughing at YOU. We were laughing at technology.

Honest!"

But after witnessing the Look he shot back, I dare say I don't think he believed me.

How To Freak Out Your Cats

2011-02-21T16:57:00.000-06:00

In three easy steps:

STEP ONE:

Get a dog.

STEP TWO:

Take dog to vet for unknown sore that won't heal.

STEP THREE:

Bring dog home after surgery on a ruptured cyst looking like this:

That'll do it. You won't see your cats for oh, approximately 3 days. (Don't fret; of course I delivered their meals downstairs like a good cat-slave should). After that, they will tentatively sneak upstairs only to freeze in mid-step and slowly back away upon discovering the dog again... not unlike a classic Loony Tunes cartoon.

Now that it's been over a week, they are slowly getting used to "Frankenpuppy" as hubby has nicknamed her, or "Zipper" (Zip for short) as I call her.

Poor Casey. Twenty staples that need to come out this week (yeah, now THAT'LL be fun).

I keep telling her she looks dashing in her high collar, but she still bumps into walls, chairs, me... with the darn thing.

And I really should stop laughing when she goes outside to do her business, has dipped her head too low in a snowbank and scooped a whole cone-full of the cold stuff onto her head. I predict she'll get the hang of wearing this thing just about the same time it comes off...

It's Like Deja Vu

2011-01-26T12:04:00.000-06:00

'Scuse me, but haven't we been through this before?

Oh yeah. THEN.

You'd think that was a once-in-a-lifetime event, wouldn't you? I would. Especially when you'd calculate the astronomical odds of it happening again IN THE SAME FRICKIN' ELEVATOR!

At least this time I was alone. No freaked-out Nervous Lady. No rude men. Just little ol' me.

Yesterday started off normally. Got up. Drove to work. Pressed the elevator button on the basement level to take me to my third floor office where my precious life-sustaining coffeemaker awaited.

As normal, the elevator door opened.

As normal, I stepped in.

As normal still, I pressed "3" and the door closed.

Then something very ABnormal happened. Everything went black.

CRAP.

I am sure it was less than a minute, but those few seconds seemed like an eternity as the worst-case-scenario thoughts sprang to mind:

Was I going up already?

If so, am I going to plunge downward to my death (or as the very least, to my slight-injury)?

And why the heck can't I find my damn cellphone so I can at least shed some light on my untimely demise?

Because it was DARK. Absolute black. No lights on the control panel. Nothing. Like total sensory deprivation. And then I remembered my previous encounter with this Evil Elevator...

Don't let it's shiny facade fool you. It's Eeeeevil I tell ya.

so I once again called upon my Super Powers and pulled open the door! My irrational fears were unfounded; I hadn't moved beyond the basement level... geez. How embarassing.

I stepped out of the ex-elevator-now-cave, as two people stopped to ask whether I was in there when the power went out.

I acted cool. "Oh yeah. No prob."

*Ahem*. Yep. I can ACT too.

But I do believe someone is hinting that I should start taking the stairs more often.

Trained Well... Perhaps TOO Well

2011-01-19T07:17:00.000-06:00

She's the best in the house - ever since she was weeks old when she was trained to play her favorite game.

And this past Christmas Santa brought new toys to delight her once again.

For she loves to play fetch.

I'll find myself sitting at the computer and she'll drop her red ball at my feet, giving my toes a gentle tap with her paw to let me know it's my turn to throw it.

Or I'll be watching TV and she'll saunter into the room, placing her new toy into my lap, ready for another game.

Sometimes she'll ask hubby to play; sometimes me. When one of us gets tired of throwing it (far sooner than she gets tired of retrieving it), she'll ask the other one to play.

Oh, you didn't think I was talking about our dog did you?

Um nope.

Dakotah is the Queen Of Fetch in our home. Yep, she's so cute carrying her favorite fuzzy, sparkly red ball all around the house looking for someone to play with. If a tap to my foot doesn't work, she'll meow to tell me to pay attention.

CUTE

The dog just sits and watches. Usually smack in the middle of the action, so Dakotah will jump over the dog if she gets in the path of the throw. And the dog just lies there with a dumb look like she has no idea what the heck is going on. (Oh yes, we tried training the dog to fetch, but she never really caught on....)

CUTE

CUTE TOO

Yep, Dakotah's trained well. Actually, perhaps TOO well, for she started bringing her ball into bed in the middle of the night.

Like at 5 am on New Year's Day when I refused to play (silly me, I just wanted to sleep off New Year's Eve!) so she began lobbing it up in the air for herself:

NOT CUTE. NOPE. NOT AT ALL.

So now, much to her utter disappointment, her ball gets confiscated at bedtime.

Now I have to train her in the difference between "play time" and "bed time".

Yeah, I know.

Good luck with THAT.

Happy New Year!

2010-12-31T21:35:00.001-06:00

Happy Nearly-2011!

As you are probably well-aware by now, I am an Uber-Loser-Stay-At-Home-New-Year's-Eve-Un-Party-er blogging at 9:30 pm on December 31st. But then at least I get in one last post for 2010. And I won't get frostbite in our lovely -37C temps outside.

Phew, what a year this was... a roller-coaster of highs and lows. And I detest roller-coasters. Why people pay good money to lose their lunch is beyond me. But I digress.

Hopefully this brand spankin' shiny New Year will:

Have LESS mischievious feline exploits:

Tawnee climbing down the inside of our Christmas tree
with a quick nibble on a bow or two for good measure, natch.

Have MORE fantabulous home projects to brag about:

It's a box!
Yes, I really do amaze myself sometimes.
(Easier than you can imagine.)
Er, this was taken BEFORE I nailed it straight
so I could remember which way it went together, okay?

Have LESS humungous malls to throw my money away at:

Hmmm. Starbucks or the "Couture and Cuisine" fashion/foodie show
at the Galleria Mall in Dallas, Texas. Tough decision.
The show DID have nearly naked men spray-painted
gold and posed as chandeliers in the middle of the tables.
No, I am NOT kidding.

Have MORE opportunities for self-control at mealtime (unless there are nearly naked men spray-painted gold and posed as chandeliers in the middle of the table):

Excuse me, Ms Cheesecake Factory waitress,
but I don't believe I ordered HALF A FREAKIN' CHICKEN for lunch!

Have LESS run-ins with nasty weather:

My ex-umbrella.
No, I didn't do this in a fit of rage.
That beyotch Mother Nature did.
In a fit of rage, I do believe.

But then again, if these things DO happen in 2011, what the heck am I going to blog about?

Nevermind. Bring it on.

Note To Self

2010-12-21T10:31:00.000-06:00

Ah vacation days over the holidays... a time to sleep in and then, at a more ~~sane~~ leisurely pace, attack my lengthy To-Do-Before-Acck!-Christmas-Is-Coming-Way-Too-Soon!!!! list.

As per my usual morning routine, I pulled myself out of bed, stepped into my slippers and staggered to the back door to let the dog out. Since it was a balmy -9 C I pulled on my jacket, not bothering to zip it up. I let Casey out to dive into the deep backyard snow drifts as I remained in the garage, deciding to be a good samaritan and once again feed the wild bunnies that live under our deck. Once the snow falls, every few days I give them something - today's meal would be a treat; a few handfuls of the Wild Delight Nut and Berry Mix I bought for our bird feeder last summer.

I reached up on tiptoes to the shelf where my gardening supplies are stored for the winter and grabbed the 3 Kg bag of seeds, nuts and fruits. Pulling it off the shelf, it nudged a tower of plastic flower pots just enough to start them teetering back and forth.

Slowly they began to topple, so out of sheer reflex I attempted to stop their plunge - with the bag of seeds, nuts and fruits, natch.

Unbeknownst to moi though, the last time I had used it, I failed to properly seal the ziplock closure on said bag of seeds, nuts and fruits.

A cascade, not unlike a Niagara Falls of seeds, nuts and fruits poured out over my head.

It poured into my jacket.

It poured into my PJs.

It poured into my slippers.

I stood in dumb shock, still holding the now nearly empty 3 Kg bag of seeds, nuts and fruits that now lay strewn all over the garage floor.

Oh well done, Maureen. Bravo.

As I shook my slippers to dispense of the seeds, nuts and fruits lodged between my toes, I looked up to see that I had indeed saved the cheap, used flower pots from an untimely demise.

Note to self:

Next time, let the stupid plastic pots fall. They'd be a tad easier to retrieve from the cold concrete garage floor than using my frozen, numb fingers to scoop up a kajillion seeds, nuts and fruits.

White Thursday - Black Friday

2010-11-29T19:06:00.002-06:00

Believe it or not, my life DOES involve more than just shopping.

Really.

And just to prove it, today I shall write about er.... um.... travel!

Okay, sure. It's about travelling to a mall, but it does involve drama, horror and overcoming incredible odds. All the ingredients for a stirring tale.

Then again, mebbe not.

It's really about *sigh* shopping.

For the past month, daughter and I have been eaglerly anticipating our first-ever "Black Friday". You see, as mild-mannered Canucks, the closest thing we have to the frenzy known as Black Friday is "Boxing Day" (born from the English tradition of giving to the poor the day after Christmas). We just had to satisfy our morbid curiosity of this strange phenomenon, so I booked our usual hotel room near the Mall of America (natch) for a few days of UCB (Uber-Consumerism-Blissfulness).

Finally the big day came: November 25th. Travel Day. American Thanksgiving. Like a scene straight out of Planes, Trains and Automobiles, we eagerly jumped out of our beds way-too-early on the morning of our eight-hour drive to witness Mother Nature's cruel joke:

I highly doubted we were going anywhere. But I shook my fist at the grey clouds, wiped the huge fluffy snowflakes out of my eyes, dug out the car, checked online to find no highway closures and stubbornly began our trip.

It was a slow start. Did I say slow? More akin to agonizingly, frustratingly snail-like.

The first hour was spent inching our way inside the city limits, at the blazing speed of 2 miles/hour on average, taking nearly an hour to drive the distance it usually takes ten minutes to travel.

Well, daughter, congratulations. We made it to Starbucks.

Down the street.

Crap. That bitch Mother Nature was winning.

More than once I flirted with the crazy idea to turn around, but we perservered. The Mall was calling.

Once we got out onto the highway, it wasn't as bad as expected. There were some tense white-out moments, but the traffic was very light -- a combination of the weather and the fact that most Americans were watching football, the Macy's parade and/or preparing to pass out after gorging on Thanksgiving turkey no doubt.

As we passed the halfway mark just beyond Fargo, the clouds parted and the light dusting of white Minnesota laughingly calls "snow" was a beautiful sight. With Sam's co-piloting expertise, we made the trip in just over our usual summer-travelling time.

Take THAT, Mother Nature! Woot!

After an early bedtime, daughter and I awoke at 3 am, wondering what we would encounter when we got to the MoA. Would we get a parking spot? Would there be lineups out the door? Would we need our extra-thick winter outerwear to keep warm as we huddled at the door, awaiting the Grand Opening? And worst of all, would I ever be able to stop this annoying habit of asking myself questions?

Um. Nope.

We parked in the nearly deserted parkade. We walked through the heated skywalk and into the Mall like it was any other day. Actually, it was very surreal: the Mall of America at 4 am on Black Friday.... other than a lineup at Best Buy (which we smartly circumvented) there was barely a shopper in sight:

Even at 2 pm when we were ready to return to our hotel to collapse amid our pile of shopping bags, the crowds weren't as bad as I had been lead to believe...

Well, now. I do think we have been taken in.

All the hype. All those dire warnings, news reports and nay-sayers.... pffft! Our Boxing Day crowds are worse. Of course, they're not spread out in the vast wasteland that is known as the MoA.... I am guessing you could have hundreds of thousands of shoppers there without realizing it.

So now at least I can say "been there, done that" when someone speaks of dum, dum, dum.... "Black Friday!"

Yep, I'm glad we went. We got a lot of great deals, had a terrific mother-daughter mini-vacation and Sam even made a new friend too.

And best of all... we didn't let Mother Nature win.

This time.