Why a story about resilience? Well, I think it’s because I need the pep talk too. I’ve been feeling a little “battle-weary” these past few days!

Most days, I’m able to stand strong…but every once in a while, I find myself struggling to keep pressing on.

Why the difference?  Well, for me, I think it’s because I lose my focus.

In the midst of too much to do…deadlines to meet…phone calls to make…and wanting to be in three places at once, I forget who I am and why I am here.   And even though I’m called by the Lord to this work of Identity and Destiny…and I know He equips me for this “good work,” I tend to take matters into my own hands, ending up with far too much on my plate.

It is in those moments that I have to take a “time out” and get re-centered on the Lord.  I need to stop striving and return to abiding in Him and His strength!   It is not enough to be with Him in my morning devotions.   It has to be moment-by-moment throughout my day.

When I prayerfully get myself refocused, I know once again that I am strong, resilient, blessed and empowered. I know that time after time, God is making it abundantly clear that He is in the midst of the life-altering work of the 7 Steps to Purpose. And then…my resilience kicks in. I am re-energized and refocused!

It is like last night’s call when I got the spiritual boost I needed.   My coaching client told me how our work together is bringing huge insight and breakthrough.   In fact, she said it had actually brought her face-to-face with what she called a “crisis of faith.” And in the midst of that crisis, she began to wonder if she could continue to do the steps and trust God with the results. Could she keep doing her part…and knowing that God would faithfully do His? Could she keep moving forward, or quit in the middle of the process?

What was at the heart of her lack of resilience? FEAR!

She was afraid to keep going–she was afraid of what she might uncover as she answered the question “Who am I?”

In her soul she wondered…Will I be good enough? Will it be painful? Will I like what I see?

She pondered those questions and tentatively persevered.   But as she persevered, she said she simply stayed focused on a few simple words I spoke in our session, “Stay in the positive. Reject the negative.”   Over and over again–as she did her daily assignments, she said these words…and for the first time in her life, she began the process of throwing out the negative labels and limiting beliefs that she carried around for years.

With gratitude and optimism she is now beginning to see just how beautiful, smart, gifted and chosen she really is!

And then her resilience kicked in. She is re-energized and refocused. So…we have both bounced back…and our work together with the 7 Steps continues.

How about you…did you need this pep talk? Are you struggling to persevere? Do you need to stop striving and start abiding? Is it time to throw off the negative labels and see how beautiful you really are? Are you ready to discover how to bounce back with resilience…and keep going?

We can help!!

Resilience is just one of the many powerful skills we teach in Identity and Destiny – 7 Steps to a Purpose-filled Life.

Buy the book…

 
And…if you find yourself asking:
What am I supposed to do now?
What is the right choice for me?
What is the best decision to make?
We can help!

We are Christian Life Coaches, and we can help you make wise choices in all the key areas of your life: job, relationships, spirituality and finances. We help you look to God for answers and gain the clarity and direction you need. We do far more than simply help you get “unstuck,” we show you how to grab hold of life and really thrive!

Call today for your FREE “Life-Success Strategy Session” with Tom or Pam.

No…you’re  not going to see it on the nightly news or in the paper…but it is a deep-rooted epidemic that is destroying hopes, dreams and potential!

Born out of unresolved insecurity, fear, shame and doubt, we work so hard to “fit in” and be accepted.

We strive – we struggle – we are sure there must be a way to finally get it right.

We go through life saying…”If only I can get to know the right people, wear the best clothes, get that new position at work., drive that fancy car and live in the right neighborhood. If only I can get the right degree, title, position or public recognition…then all will finally be well within my soul. I will know who I am…and, best of all, so will everyone else!

But – as many of you already know – these kinds of things never satisfy for very long!  And there is always someone else who is thinner, richer, smarter and more successful.  So…in the end, none of this makes us feel valued…or valuable. And, even with all that struggling and striving, there is still no real sense of peace or purpose!

See…the truth is…NONE of your trying will ever define who you are…nor is it going to satisfy this longing in your soul for meaning and significance.

The only thing that will ever allow you to discover the magnificent essence of who you are… is to seek God himself for answers.

It is all found in your relationship with the Lord…and knowing what He sees when He looks at you!

In Him all things were made. (John 1:3)

He knows the plans and purpose He has  for your life. (Jeremiah 29:11)

All the days ordained for you were written by God -before one of them came to be. (Psalm 139:16)

So, the answer to the question, “Who am I”…is NOT about what you do!!!  It is about who you are in God’s eyes.

And you were fearfully and wonderfully made!!!  (Psalm139:14)  You are beautiful – You’re one-of-a-kind – You are  special!

And yes – that means YOU!!!

God made you exactly the way you were meant to be.  And if you will simply listen for his voice, you will hear Him say, “You are OK just the way I made you – now run with it!”

You are precious in His eyes…and He is anxiously waiting for you to stop all the craziness…He is saying, “Please, dear one, STOP  looking for love…and self-worth…in all the wrong places!   Come to ME…seek ME for answers and direction.  “I am the Way, the Truth and the Life.” (John 14:6)

You are designed and created perfectly for the plans and purpose God has for your life.

Aren’t you ready to go to the one who planned and created you to get your answers?  Isn’t’ it time to seek the Lord and find out what he has in store for you?

Seek God and you will find all you have been looking for…and much, much more!

“Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” (Matthew 6:33)

So…are you ready to make a change?   Are you ready to go from fear, frustration and uncertainty…to hope, confidence and  purpose?  If you want to get started , we would love to help.  Contact us at  (pam@identityanddestiny.com  or tom@identityanddestiny.com.

But – regardless of how you choose to do it…now is the time to stop the struggle and  begin the journey to discover your God-given Identity and Destiny.

You do the steps…God does the rest!

Based on both personal and professional experience, we would suggest that indeed it is!   But the question is this…are you aware of the language you are speaking?

There are many forms of communication that go beyond the written or spoken word.  They include body language, tonality, pitch, hand and body gestures, facial expressions and voice inflection or emphasis.

For example - in a recent 60-second TV commercial - the advertiser flashes from one man to the next, and all any of the guys ever said is the word “Dude”.  Depending on the way they said it…moved their heads…rolled their eyes…or emphasized the word…you not only could tell exactly what they were saying, you knew whether they meant  the message to be a statement or a question…funny or sad…complimentary or derogatory.  In just one minute,  that one word – “Dude” – became a language all it’s own!

And so it is in life! 

How many times have you said something, only to have the other person react by saying, “I can’t believe you just said that!” 

Taken back, your response is…” What???  What did I say?”

After going back and forth,  you realize it is not what you said, but how you said it that turned out to be the problem.

So the questions is this:

What language are you speaking?  Is there a way to know?  Is there a means of learning to understand the language of others and adapt in ways that will allow you to improve communication and understanding? 

The answer is yes!!!

And there are many tools that can help  – but one of our favorites is the DISC personality and behavioral style analysis.

This simple, yet highly insightful, profiling instrument is easy and quick…but provides amazing details about your natural behavioral language – as well as the language you will revert to when under pressure.   

It shows you ways to recognize the language of those around you…learn how to adapt and respond in ways that can make a huge difference in the quality of your communication  in all your personal and professional relationships.

DISC is one of the 25 questionnaires, profiles and inventories contained in our workbook, Identity and Destiny – 7 Steps to a Purpose-filled Life.  Here’s a brief excerpt:

DISC is based on the pioneering work of Harvard psychologist William Moulton Marston. In his 1928 book on the subject, he describes four classic quadrants of human behavior:

     D = Dominant, Driver                                               

     I = Influencing, Inspiring

     S = Steady, Stable

     C = Correct, Compliant

The DISC is often referred to as the “language of behavior.” Knowing your strongest behavior quadrant will help you know your language and understand yourself better. As it relates to purpose, it will help you recognize the roles you are best suited to fill and those that simply aren’t a good “fit”.      It is not that you are incapable of doing certain things or exhibiting all four characteristics of DISC. Odds are, you can do anything you put your mind to. But, the critical questions you will answer here are:

• How am I naturally wired to behave?
• What’s my behavioral comfort zone?

You will learn the basic motivation that drives your behavior–your best situations and environments–your best way of communicating, interacting with others and making decisions.

An important thought to bear in mind as you explore the various types of personalities: It takes ALL the styles to make good families, marriages, teams, churches, small groups and organizations. The greatest value of knowing your personality style–and that of others–is to recognize, understand and appreciate the differences!

For as we have many members in one body,

but all the members do not have the same function,

so we, being many, are one body in Christ,

and individually members of one another.

Romans 12: 4-5

FIND, KNOW AND LIVE YOUR GOD-GIVEN PURPOSE!

Take your first step today – take our FREE Life Purpose Quiz at  www.identityanddestiny.com

LEARN THE BEHAVIORAL LANGUAGE YOU SPEAK! 

To learn more about  our on line DISC and personality package…here is the direct link for info:  http://www.identityanddestiny.com/disc-profiles-page.php

God has an amazing plan for your life…are you ready to jump into all that He has for you?

First…let’s talk about something that might be a prerequisite…

There are natural laws and principles that are operative in this world – like the law of gravity – what goes up – will come down.

There are also laws and principles that are just as indisputable in the Kingdom of God.  One of those:  believing is a prerequisite to receiving.

This follows a pattern you will find over and over again  in Scripture :  a command followed by a promise.  If you do this…then God can do this.

Now don’t get me wrong…this is not some magic formula.  God is not our cosmic bell hop…but there are certain laws that are operative…and we must heed the reality of that truth.

So  why not make 2012 the year that you choose to believe…and just see what God will do?

Why not move forward in faith…certain of what you hope for and sure of what you cannot (yet) see.  (Heb 11:1)

In the pursuit of purpose in the Identity and Destiny – 7 Steps to Purpose, you will seek God directly for answers.

And when God speaks to you about His plans – you must know and believe that everything is already in place to fulfill his Word.

He knows exactly what will come to pass.

Your job is to believe Him – to take Him at his Word.

It is impossible to even imagine all that God has in store four you when you trust Him. (Eph 3:20)

God has everything in place.  Will you trust Him?  Will you step out in faith?

You do the Steps – God does the rest!!!

Yikes!  If you are like us – this probably sounds hauntingly familiar.  But why does it always seem to work out that way?

What kind of resolutions lead to this result?

When the Franklin Covey management firm polled more than 15, 000 customers about their planned New Year’s resolutions – the ones at the top of this list included  – get out of debt; save more money lose weight; and start exercising.    (Yikes again!  These have all surely topped our lists in any given year!)

So, if resolutions…and the things we say we want to do…are so common - why are we so unlikely to keep them?

The Covey survey reported that nearly 40% say they simply have too many other things going on in their lives.  33% say they simply aren’t all that committed to making it really happen. Yet, many experts say the real problem is that people make the wrong resolutions.  The typical resolution often reflects a ‘general desire’ rather than a ’real goal.’

So this year…rather than setting some broad – pie in the sky – resolution that has little or no chance of succeeding…let us share what we’ve learned that has helped us succeed in setting attainable goals that really can be achieved.

Want 2012 to be better?  Want 2012 to  be the year you finally reach goals that have been on your list forever?  If so, read on…

The key is something we learned back in our college business management courses - but somehow – it took years  before we actually began to put it into practice in a consistent and intentional way.

So here’s  3 Secrets for Successful Goal Attainment :

Secret # 1 –  Whenever you set goals – be sure they are SMART Goals.

S – specific - rather than simply saying, “I want to loose weight” – you would set the goal of achieving a healthy weight for your height and body type as well as establishing healthier eating habits.

M – measurable – you would then establish a way to measure your success by to narrowing your goal down to the result you are wanting to attain, for example: to go from your current weight of 150 pounds to your desired weight of 128 pounds and then consistently maintain that weight within a pound or two.

A – attainable – this is where you do a” reasonableness check”.  Make sure your goals are actually attainable.  If you haven’t seen 128 pounds since you were 12 years old, maybe looking at 135 as your phase 1 goal would not only seem more attainable, but would allow you to realistically reach success and then give you the confidence you need to set a phase 2 goal of 128 pounds.

R – relevant – this one is key.  This is where you ask yourself the question, “how important is this to me? – am I willing to do whatever it takes to make this goal happen in my life?”    If you simply say, “I’d  like to do this” - odds are - it won’t happen.  If you make a conscious decision that this goal is REALLY important…if you can genuinely say , “I am determined!”…your odds for success will improve exponentially!

T – time sensitive – you must put a date for achieving your goal.  Better yet, break it down into bite size pieces by saying I will loose 1 pound per week and be at my goal by a specific date.  This eliminates the wiggle room of getting around to it later…and gives you little victories along the way.

Secret #2 – Limit your resolutions and make improvements that will last!

If you make too many resolutions…or set too many new goals…you won’t have enough time, energy or focus to actually make them all happen at once. And you surely won’t be able to make them last.

Take one big goal at a time.  Select the one that means the very most to you, start with it, and be well on your way to success before starting another big goal.

Setting goals and achieving them normally requires change that then must be integrated into your life.  To continue with our example of loosing weight – if you focus on all that it takes to get that done, it may include adding exercise, a new way of shopping and cooking, as well as altering your eating habits and patterns.  Rather than simply loosing the weight – only to gain it all back – you need to give full concentration not only to what is required to achieve your goal – but what is required to make permanent change in your lifestyle.  It is no longer just about a diet but how to have successfully adopted a healthy-eating, weight maintenance lifestyle.

Secret #3 – Don’t let a mis-step turn into failure!

First – you must decide that failure is not an option.

Second, if you find you aren’t reaching your goals or you have fallen away from what it takes to get it done, refer to number 1 above and then… it’s like the old adage…’when you get knocked off a horse…get right back up and start riding again’.

Don’t wallow in condemnation.  Learn from what has happened, recommit to your SMART goals, determine what it is going to take to get back on track and just go back at it.  No harm not foul.  Just get going again!

But – if you find this ‘just get going’ mantra isn’t working for you, it may be time to think about getting someone to come along side you and be an accountability partner. You may want to consider a life coach who specializes in goal setting and attainment.  Sometimes we just aren’t able to go it alone when we are making big changes in life.  Don’t be afraid to reach out for help.

And…as a believer in Jesus Christ, we would say, first and foremost – PRAY!  God can do what we cannot.  He’s our strength when we have none to go on.  He will never leave you nor forsake you.  Do not be afraid, do not be discouraged.  (Deuteronomy 31:8)

So, don’t wait!  Employ these 3 Secrets and you will be amazed by the results.

You really can make 2012 your best year ever.  This can be the year you take those things you’ve always wanted to do  – begin knocking them off the list - and start looking to the future with a brand new sense of confidence, freedom and an assurance that the goals you set can definitely be achieved!

Happy New Year and May God Bless!

Now, please take a moment post your goals right here on our blog.  Let us help you stay accountable and celebrate you success.  Be sure to stay in touch with us.  We want to hear your story!

Tom and Pam

As I read this scripture this morning, I said, “Thank you Lord for your Word…for in it I find the encouragement I need for for everyday life!!!”

How bout you…do you need a good dose of encouragement from the Lord?

Let me share what God  has been reminding me about lately.  Hopefully it will fill your spirit with the “juice” you need to do whatever it is God is calling you to do.

Remember this:

God will never call you to do anything without faithfully keeping His Word and enabling you to do it.  You may not always be faithful to do what God tells you…but He is always faithful – standing by His Word and fulfilling His promises.

The tricky part is this…it may not happen the way you first envisioned -  and it may not happen within the timing that you’ve laid out in your day planner.

God may have spoken to you and called you into a particular ministry, a challenge with your children or marriage, or what you should be doing in your job /or about finding a job.  But NOW you are facing obstacles.  Obstacles that look as BIG as the Red Sea did to the Israelites when they were fleeing the Egyptians.

You’ve obeyed God, but the circumstances you’re in right now makes no sense.  Even though you’re  certain this calling is something God wants you to accomplish - it is now looking downright IMPOSSIBLE.

It is times like these that it is most important not to forget the faithfulness of our God!

Go back and look at what happened in Exodus 14 when Moses told his people, “Do not be afraid.  Stand firm and you will see the deliverance  the Lord will bring to you today.” And indeed He did…God dried up the Sea…letting His people pass on dry ground…only to let it flow back in and vanquish their enemies…just in the nick of time.  Now that is a faithful God!

Regardless of what you are facing - do not loose hope.  Remember the testimony of God’s people throughout the ages.  Allow time for God to reveal His faithfulness.  And, if you will stand firm, I know you will one day be able to reflect back on God’s absolute faithfulness and praise Him for ALL He has done.

Do you have a Red Sea Story you would be willing to share as encouragement to others?

Do you have a need for the kind of encouragement that only God can give?

Share your comments and join us in praying for one another.

Over the years…based on personal experience…I can tell you the single most important thing any of us can do – after we have accepted Jesus Christ as Lord and savior of our lives – is spend time everyday  meditating on the God’s Word.

So,,,what does it mean to “meditate” on God’s Word?

It means digesting Scripture – word by word - rather than just reading it like the Sunday paper? It means chewing on it; talking to God about what each word means; asking Him what He wants you to learn and how He wants you to apply it to your life.

As I have learned to do this, the meaning of the Scriptures has become deeper, more personal and filled with a power that not only  feeds my soul but allows God to show me His way of making lasting change in my life.  His ways may not be our ways, but if you will faithfully obey what He shows you…it will bring the kind of  peace, joy and hope that nothing else can!

You may be saying “yea right – whatever!?!”

But please dont’ discount the power of spending time with the Lord asking Him what He wants to say to you about his written Word.  As the old saying goes…”try it…you might like it”.  And you may just find that the answers you’ve been looking for!

Let me give you a quick example:

Recently I talked with God about Mark 8:34-36…I will show you how it went as we began in Mark 8:34:

“If anyone would come after me, he must deny him self and take up his cross and follow me.”

Word by word – here is what He showed me:

Anyone = every last one of us – no exceptions

Come =  we have a choice…not all will come…but those who do need to be ready

Must = it is a requirement…not optional…not a suggestion

Deny Himself = self control and self discipline…Fruit of the Spirit requiring my cooperation and obedience

His = it is personal – unique to me  and to each one of us

Cross = my personal assignment as given by God

Follow me = abide in me – every moment of every day!  In His power alone is this possible.

So – based on this revelation from the Lord – what does this scripture say to me now?

If I – Pam Wolf – would choose to come after the Lord, I am required to exercise the kind of self- discipline needed to ready myself for the unique assignment to which God has called me.  And if I am to do this, the only way success is possible is through abiding in the Him…His Word…and His power.

Meditating  in this way  – God has given me a personal understanding of a verse of scripture that before now…was really rather confusing.  But now…for today…this is what He has shown me.

So..I’ve got my marching orders – how bout you?

For more about Meditating on God’s Word…

Check out our workbook “Identity and Destiny – 7 Steps to a Purpose-filled Life” on the home page of our web site.

I have often referred people to Josh McDowell’s book, “More than a Carpenter” for historical, archaeological and credible evidence that supports the belief that the Bible is not only true…but it is indeed the inspired word of God.

But today, I got an email with this brief summary that says it all in just a few simple…but profound…paragraphs.

Read on and judge for yourself.

A student was told…you must choose 66 books, written by 40 different authors, over 1500 years, in 3
different languages, written on 3 different continents. However, they must
share a common storyline, a common theme, and a common message, with no
historical errors or contradictions.” I went  on to say, “If you can produce
such a collection of books, I will admit that the Bible is not the inspired word
of God.” The student’s reply was almost instantaneous, he emphatically stated,
“But that’s impossible!”

It truly is impossible, for any collection of human writings. However, the Bible
passes this test. The Bible contains 66 books, written by 40 different authors,
over 1500 years, in 3 different languages, on 3 different continents, with no
historical errors or contradictions. The entire Bible, from Genesis
to Revelation, bears the mark of Divine inspiration.

Not sure…begin reading the Bible for yourself and discover just how life-altering the truths in the Bible can be…it is not just a bunch of old-time sotries and parables…but truly the most profuond way for God to speak to us…and show us just how much he truly love us.

Why not start today?