First off…..get the age thing right. The boy they selected for the kid who went #2 in the bath tub? He looks like he’s about 5. Now maybe I have lost my memory due to peri-menopause, but he looks a little old to be using a “potty” still.  And seriously point out a mother who wouldn’t be yelling at this mess?

Secondly, that commercial is repulsive. Completely.

Now if this happened to me? I’d pretend I didn’t see it and wait for my husband to get home. He usually showers as soon as he gets home from work.

Haven’t seen it yet? Here  you go:

Yours?

True story:

I’m sitting in “My Spot” on the couch today. My dear husband is sitting in “His Spot”.

We both have laptops on…shockingly, our laps.

He can see my screen, I can see his.

I’m sitting and intensely working on “Work”. He asks me if I could please google something for him.

And me?  I respond, “Sure honey, let me stop right in the middle of programming some software. I wouldn’t want you to be interrupted from Facebook!!!! Muah, Muah.  What else can I do for you?”

Okay, I lied in that true story. I didn’t really respond that way.

I just looked at his screen and said .”Seriously?”

That won’t be happening again, any time soon.:)

My own mother tried to carry on the bingo tradition with my own son, by buying him a Bingo Set one Hanukkah.  Sadly she was more interested in it than her 5 year old grandson, who’s only desire was to spin the ball cage the entire time. She and I ended up playing it ourselves, several times until  my son got a hold of the set. B6, and I19 were lost in the abyss along with my wedding band. All three of which are STILL missing……6 years later.

So, I have become my grandmother, and it actually makes me smile to think that I do take after her. She was an amazing woman and perhaps one of the most influential people in my life.  My son was named after her. Most of my passwords contain part of her name. I have her eyes.  I have her desire to volunteer for everything in the world. I hug as freely as she did.

I think of her every time I sit on my front porch in the summer. I think of her every time I use her Mah Jong set.  And I think of her every time I hear or see a bingo number being called.

They came in Red Cherry and Honey flavors.

I ate those drops as though they were candy. Cough, or no cough.  What could be better than faking a cough, staying home from school and going through boxes of Honey flavored Pine Brothers, or from

Why you ask?

It’s not Black Friday. You won’t catch me near a mall. I refuse to get up at some insane hour just to save $20 on one item and blow it 10 times over on the other things I pick up.

No, the thrill of my day after is this:

Here in lies the sole reason why I host Thanksgiving every year for the past 14 years. LEFTOVERS.

This delicacy is an amazing combination of all the best dishes of the holiday. Fresh turkey, cranberry dressing and home made cornbread chestnut stuffing. What’s missing in this picture is the giant side of gravy for dipping. It’s messy and delicious and a sensory orgasm.

If you’ve never had one…….(the sandwich, not the orgasm), you need to try it!

Let me add that I am all good with whatever floats your boat. As long as you are happy, I’m happy too.

We have come a long way since Lucy and Ricky slept in separate twin beds.

W I T S    E N D

How to drive the point through, that homework and tests are things to be taken seriously. How is it that some children are so responsible and conscientious and some……..could care less.

My son is a smart boy. He gets A’s in subjects he likes, B’s in the subjects he does not like….English and Reading.

He really could earn A’s in these subjects if he did a very simple thing.   About 20 minutes of homework.  A 20 minute 4 day a week investment could reap so many long term rewards 10, 20 years from now.

How to drive that point home though?

I’ve tried:

1. The long winded speeches on how his job is on getting good grades. By getting good grades,  he earns rewards. Xbox, games, blah, blah blah.
2. Punishment.
3. Monty Hall worthy deals.

I came up with number 4 of my tries:

I took my son for a drive the other day.  I asked him to point out a car he would  not want to drive and he showed me a very old, beat up car. I then asked him if he thinks the driver of that car got good grades in school. He responded “no”.  I then asked him a car he hopes he can have one day and if he though the driver of that car studied.  I did this with him over a few topics. I asked him this about a few other people and things we saw.

I asked him if he thought Bill Gates got good grades. And if President Obama got good grades. His favorite uncle, who is a doctor. Yes to all three.

Silence.

Maybe he is getting the importance of good grades now?

No, it backfired on me.

He told me good grades don’t always matter and that he’s getting the best possible grade in the subject that really matters for the job HE wants.  Center Fielder for the Red Sox.

Phys Ed: He’s got a 100% Average.

So I have this new understanding.

Sports plays such a huge roll in the lives of boys today, and I do think it’s pretty wonderful and healthy. However, what I (and I am sure many others) don’t realize is that these boys  are a little misguided. They see players like Derek Jeter or the Mannings or….WHOEVER and think success can be had by excelling in sports.   In the eyes of an 11 year old boy, how important can reading and science be if you’re going to be an MLB superstar? They think their odds are great. They don’t know they’ll more than likely need a plan B or plan C in life.

I’m curious what others think about this. Is this just a phase and eventually the importance of all topics will click in?

That is who I have become.

My standard excuse when caught? So original.  “We ran out of  ***insert item***.

I went from the always perfect hair,  always current fashion and ready to run into anyone….to THAT woman. The one who wears these:

Slippers.        Everywhere.       Daily.        And aside from sleeping…..all day.

Fortunately, I keep a pair of street worthy shoes in my car. This is only to minimize the level of embarrassment for my son when I actually have to leave the car for something. When he’s not with me, I don’t bother.

I won’t even address the fact that my baggy, rolled up jeans have become a uniform as well.

I really need to get myself a job OUTSIDE of the home.  Home offices are just not conducive to fashion or effort in fashion.