My aim has always been to help people live more on their own terms and live extraordinary lives. But the focus hasn’t been as clear as I’d like. This blog started out primarily as a self development blog, then it began to transition into following your passion and getting paid to do what you love. Then, I started helping people break limiting structures and had a lot of fun doing coaching around that.

But throughout all of this I feel like my focus hasn’t been completely clear. That’s about to change.

The new direction of Illuminated Mind will be 100% directed toward helping you create a sustainable income following your passion and making a meaningful difference in the world.

It’s taken me a while to step into this purpose fully. For a while I questioned whether or not I was qualified to do this. While for the past year and a half I’ve supported myself and my family doing what makes me come alive, for some reason I struggled with going all out helping people follow their passions and making a living doing it.

I’m not sure why… maybe it’s fear. Maybe I thought I would put myself in a box. Maybe I thought people would question my credentials (I don’t have any “official” credentials).

But even with this questioning, it’s clear that this is what I’m meant to do with my life. Nearly every coaching client I’ve had has come to me specifically for help getting paid to be who they are. And partnering with them, I’ve helped them achieve some incredible results. A few weeks ago, I found out that a client I did only one session with went from zero to 5 paying clients per week. He did it within a month, and this was after just one coaching session.

And then it kind of hit me: Why am I holding myself back with this? Why am I not going all in?

I didn’t have a satisfying answer to that question. It was clear that the only thing holding me back was my own insecurity about stepping fully into my purpose.

So, that ends here.

From now on, the main purpose of my work at Illuminated Mind will be to help you make a living doing what makes you come alive, and do it while making a difference in the world.

I’ll keep talking about the other stuff that’s important to me, like the perfect path, doing remarkable things, and why passion alone won’t build a business. But now everything that I write, share, and create will be centered around the main purpose: helping people earn a living doing what they love.

What this has to do with you

If you’ve been struggling to find meaning in your work, and feel like you’ve been renting out your mind to achieve someone else’s goals just to survive, then I’d like to help you. That is, if you’d like to experience something different.

In a few days I’ll be opening up enrollment for Paid to Exist, an eight week course I’ve created to help you go from Ground Zero to a sustainable business doing what you love.

I’ll be releasing some highly valuable free content next week that I believe is worth at least the cost of the course. If you’d like to get that content, here is where you can register:

Click here to get the Paid to Exist Six Month Road Map (released next week)

It feels good for me to be all in with my purpose. I’d like to help you do the same.

Will you join me?

So you start to wonder… maybe I don’t really need goals. Maybe goals are the problem. Maybe I just need to accept things the way they are, right now. Then you might think…

Maybe I should kill my goals.

I’ve thought a lot about this myself. I’ve gone back and forth from living completely goal-less, to being utterly goal-consumed, and everywhere in between. What I’ve come to find is this:

What matters isn’t achieving or not achieving goals. Goals within themselves are not good or bad. What matters the most is not achieving the perfect goals, but cultivating the perfect path.

“You know you’re on the perfect path when you wouldn’t change anything about it.”

Goals can be great tools to help you cultivate a perfect path, but they’re only effective inasmuch as they help you to experience an incredibly awesome present. If they don’t improve the present, they’re probably not very good goals.

I started thinking about this a lot on real paths, ones in the mountains and back country of where I live in Southern California. And I was inspired to shoot this short video on an incredibly beautiful path at Colby trail. (If you’re reading this in a feed reader or email, click here to view the video)

I’ve been thinking about this idea of cultivating the perfect path for a while now, and it’s really shifted the way I think about a lot of things. It’s caused me to…

• Start exploring the beauty of the world instead of thinking that I need to do something to change it.
• Realize the fastest way to change the world is often to look for the good already in it.
• Choose goals that make me feel good right now, instead of sometime in the future.
• Spend more time with my wife and my family.
• Go on more hikes, read more books, and practice martial arts for the fun of it (not to achieve anything).
• Be more playful.
• Approach life with more curiosity and wonder.
• Stop worrying about money and realize the amazing amount of abundance that exists without me having to create it.

And it’s not that I’ve killed all of my goals. I still have a lot of them. But if I don’t reach them, I don’t freak out. If I reach my benchmarks, I celebrate. But I also celebrate even when I don’t.

“Life is too short to do anything but celebrate all the time.”

Basically, I don’t need a reason to celebrate any more. When I have one, it’s just an unexpected bonus.

Sometimes my goals guide the path, sometimes my path guides the goals I choose, but it’s always about the path.

Probably the biggest thing that I’ve learned is that no matter what is influencing the other — the path influencing the goals, or the goals influencing the path — what matters ultimately is that I am enjoying the path.

And I know based on how I feel. When I feel great, when I wake up excited, when I have unexplained, spontaneous bursts of laughter… I am on the perfect path. When I am feeling sluggish, overwhelmed or stressed, it’s a signal that somehow I’ve gone a little off course. I need to retrace my steps and get back on my heart-centered path.

How I feel, my intuition and my internal compass are my guidance system. When I listen, they tell me when I am on course or not. Everything that directs me is found from within. Not without.

“It’s not about finding a path ‘out there,’ it’s about embracing the beautiful one always waiting inside of you. The best part is, you don’t need to create it. Start from your core, and take the first step.”

There is an incredible, delicious and exciting journey waiting inside of you. All you need to do is start exploring it. You don’t need to find it, you don’t need to follow anyone else’s path. As Joseph Campbell said “If there is a path, it’s not your path.” I think that’s true.

The only real satisfying path is the one you uncover in yourself.

True paths are uncovered, unearthed, and created through your feet kissing the earth.

As I said before, the path is already inside of you. And the way it’s uncovered is through your feet kissing the earth with each step you take. With each stride, your soul makes love to the world, and you begin co-creating your life.

Your walking creates the unfolding.

“The object is not to drink to quench your thirst. The object is to develop the perfect thirst, so that you never stop drinking.” – Sufi teaching

The object of your perfect path is not to get anywhere. Even though we think it is, because that seems to make sense. The reason you walk, or take action is not to achieve.

It would seem like the path is only a means to an end, a route to reach the goal.

But it’s not.

The reason for the path is to experience, to cultivate an incredibly satisfying now. Which is really not that hard at all. You don’t have to find the perfect path, remember?

You have all the tools you need to uncover it: your intuition, your feelings, and your internal compass will guide you.

The first question is, how much are you enjoying now? That’s the only way you can know whether or not you’re on the right path.

It’s already waiting inside you. It’s here. Take a moment to feel it within you, stirring, restless and waiting to awaken from its slumber.

I guess the next question is, when will you start your journey?

photo courtesy of izzard

It’s easy to get caught up in the race for more. Sometimes I get to the end of the day and think about all the things I didn’t do or could have done. And it’s hard not to feel a bit letdown.

Yesterday, there were a lot of things that I wanted to do that I didn’t get done:

• I didn’t create a reshoot a video for Paid to Exist that I’ve been wanting to do.
• I didn’t do any strength training. (I did go on a 15 mile hike the other day though, so maybe I’m off the hook.)
• I didn’t further any of my marketing goals.
• I didn’t do as much writing as I wanted to.

There a lot of things I didn’t do. And they’re all valid and important things to me. But sometimes life happens…

• I woke up at 5:30am, had a mastermind call, then went back to sleep (see: 15 mile hike)
• I made dinner for my wife (Pad Thai, and it took me a while since I had never made it before)
• I took a nap because I had a headache from quitting caffeine

And now that I think about it, yesterday was a pretty awesome day overall, despite the disruption of my prolific work expectations. But the point is that my first reaction was to judge how I felt by how much I accomplished. As if my sense of worth is somehow determined by how many things I check off a list.

Maybe you can relate.

Last week, Charlie wrote about why we need more reflection on enough and it got me thinking a lot about what it means to be enough, to have enough, to do enough.

It can seem like there is a conflict between an abundance mindset and an efficiency mindset. If you have enough, that means you need to be satisfied with less, right? You need to pare things down until you are surviving simply on the essentials needed to sustain yourself and your physical body.

But I don’t think that’s the only way to frame enough. I actually think that enough is the doorway to abundance. If you are always seeking more, and think you are going toward abundance by collecting more things, you will only find fake abundance. No matter how many resources you allocate, there will always seem like more are missing. Because you are not content, you cannot experience abundance.

And that’s because real abundance exists in the present. Real abundance has nothing to do with you creating it or achieving it sometime in the future. Abundance is what reality is made of. You don’t have to do anything to make it so, that’s just the way it is. The only way to experience that abundance is to open yourself to what already is.

If you think you have to take control of your own abundance, that’s only half true. Really, the only thing you need to do is stop resisting what already is. And much of that resistance comes from either:

• Seeking abundance in the future
• Believing that you have to do something about it

Letting go of those two things is hard. But it really starts with one simple thing:

Being enough.

The more that this present moment, right now, is enough, the easier things will start to get. You will no longer be resisting the abundance around you. Even if you’re experiencing a sense of lack based on your circumstances or situation, that’s only because internally you are resisting. Stop resisting, and you’ll see your situation change. I’ve seen it happen over and over in my own life. I’m sure you will too.

And enough doesn’t have to conflict with more. It’s just the starting point. You can have enough and. What you desire expands from enough, from what already is. It’s not a reaching out to fill something that’s missing, it’s an expression or unfolding from your core that is always complete, and always whole.

That wholeness exists right now. Can you feel it? Can you become aware of your wholeness?

When you feel like you are enough, and that what you have is enough, it feels good. And it’s the only way to experience real abundance.

photo courtesy of incurable_hippie

It’s interesting to me how often we are totally wrong about what is possible for us. Us humans aren’t very good at predicting things, particularly when it comes to predicting what we’re capable of. A lot of that has to do with the assumptions we make about ourselves and the world.

And a lot of those assumptions are wrong.

That’s because success isn’t tied to experience and practice, as much as it’s tied to choice. That can be a bit uncomfortable to accept, but it’s often the truth.

Practice and repetition can help you to perform the neural pathways to coordinate a kick or punch in martial arts. Drills can help you to learn how to parry, evade, or block. Feints, counter attacks, and combinations can help to learn how to attack more effectively. But until you choose to hit, you probably won’t.

You can practice something over and over, and you can gain a lot of experience, but there’s something qualitatively different about choosing to be remarkable. When you decide that you are going to succeed, a shift happens in your mind. Instead of thinking about “how you might try to make it happen (maybe),” you move into a place of “this is going to happen, whatever it takes.”

You can try to write a great book, or you can choose to create a best-selling book.

You can try to be a great partner, or you can decide that that is what you’ll be.

You can practice balancing, or you can choose to not fall down.

You can make an effort to eat healthy, or you can make a choice that you will be healthy.

You can try to follow your passion, or you can decide that is the only path you will follow.

The interesting thing about making that shift to what is possible is that it would seem like deciding that something will happen would involve a lot of strain, controlling, and hard work. But the opposite is usually the case. When you’re trying to do something, it’s a lot harder because there’s a lack of confidence, belief, and complete commitment. You’ll usually seesaw back and forth from being energized and taking action to being frustrated and questioning your abilities.

And that wavering effort dilutes the power and force of your energy.

Being all-in, however, doesn’t include the energy drain of constant questioning and a waxing and waning commitment that takes a lot of energy to maintain.

Sure, sometimes doubts and fears will arise. But because you’ve given all of your heart, not half of it, you will have a much easier time overcoming those difficulties as they come. It’s easier to quell your doubts with your whole heart engaged, than when you’re internally divided.

Giving yourself over like this is probably one of the most challenging things you can do in your life. And it’s also one of the most important decisions you can make.

When you move in the direction of complete commitment to your path, you simultaneously move in the direction of radical honesty with yourself. And that means becoming honest with yourself about what you really do want. You say Yes to the real power that you have inside of you.

Ultimately, you say Yes to yourself.

After that, who knows what will happen. But I can bet that your life will probably never be the same.

photo courtesy of It’s Greg

Lift Off Retreat

First, my good friend and business partner Charlie Gilkey and Pamela Slim are doing their second Lift Off Retreat. If you’ve been wanting to connect with other people in person to get some support with your business, this might be exactly what you’re looking for. They have packed this trip full of super-charged coaching and support from people that really get what you’re doing.

Last time, the retreat was held in Arizona. The one in a few days will be up in Portland, Oregon. If you think you could use some one-on-one help and a jump-start to your business, this retreat will do that for you. Last I checked there are only 7 spots left, so you might want to submit your application while there’s still time.

Small ways to make a big difference

My friend Raam Dev has released a free document called “Small Ways to Make a Big Difference.” It features 40 bloggers and influencers that answer the question “What small things can I do to make a difference in the world?” Yes, it features yours truly.

But I’m not just sharing it here to promote myself. I think there’s an important message behind this that we often overlook. Sometimes we don’t need to do big, epic things to change the world. Sometimes just being encouraging, being mindful, or practicing kindness is enough.

It’s the same with our own lives, too. Sometimes what can make a big difference is something really small, like meditating for 10 minutes in the morning, drinking a smoothie every day, or doing something that you’re afraid to do.

If you’re interested in learning some small things you can do to make a big difference, here’s where you can download the free ebook.

Discover your purpose, and sustain yourself and others with it

A lot of people struggle with this elusive idea of purpose. It seems so big and scary. And we avoid trying to figure it out because we’re afraid we’ll screw it up, or that we’ll confine ourselves by having a narrowly defined purpose.

The truth is, purpose doesn’t have to be either of those things. You really can’t mess up your purpose (you can always change it, right?), and purpose should be something empowering and expanding. Not something that restricts you. If it is making you feel confined, it’s probably not the right purpose anyway.

So, how do you find your purpose? And how can you support yourself while following it?

My friend Aaron and I will be talking about that next Tuesday on a special webinar dedicated to this subject. There is no-cost to join in, and if you can’t make it to the live version, we’ll be sending out a recording.

If you think you could use some help with this, you can learn more about it here.

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So, that’s what’s going on with me. What’s new in your world?

A slight level of discomfort creates a completely different mindset, one in which you’re eager to move and create. You become inquisitive; you explore and invent. Your role shifts from passive observer to active participant.

Many of us have become so comfortable in our lives that we’ve forgotten exactly HOW to make ourselves uncomfortable. To help ignite your excitement about this idea, I thought I’d share a few strategies on how to do this.

1. Break a Routine

Routines are comfortable and mindless, which can often be a good thing. But when you want to break out of the comfort zone, you have to first break your routine. The good news is that it doesn’t have to be anything huge. Tiny little changes are enough to snap your brain back into focus. Remember, it’s all about engaging with the world around you. A slight shift in your routine is usually enough to re-engage the brain. Try simple things like taking a new route to work, or using a different phone greeting, or scheduling your morning tasks for the afternoon instead. Notice how these small changes make you feel more alert and present.

2. Follow a Dream

We all have secret little daydreams we like to think about but never follow through on. It’s time to bite the bullet and just go for it. Start that new hobby you’ve always thought about (skydiving anyone?). Take that big trip you’ve been “planning” since childhood. There’s no better time to confront your fear and accomplish something you’ve always dreamed of. It might be scary at first, but I promise you it won’t last long. And the feeling of pure bliss and pride that comes once you’ve done it will last the rest of your life.

3. Choose “Right” Over “Easy”

When you make this choice, you’ll never regret your actions. Do the things you know you should do but don’t want to. Sure, it’ll be hard to get started. But once you do—more often than not—you’ll realize that it’s not as bad as you thought it would be. So grab your workout gear and head over to the gym. Agree to go to that upcoming networking event. Pick up the phone and call your mother for goodness sake! This is the kind of discomfort that indicates progress. Remember that the “right” thing to do isn’t always the “easy” thing.

4. Fall in Love Again

If you want to experience the sheer joy of pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, you’ll take me up on this suggestion. Nothing makes you feel more alive than rediscovering something you once loved. Maybe you used to go dancing with your ex but gave it up when you split. Get back in the ballroom! What activities did you love as a kid? Perhaps you should tap into that childlike enthusiasm and pick up painting or soccer or tickling. If you used to love it, chances are you still will. It might feel awkward at first but then, you’ll fall right back into it just like riding a bike. In fact, maybe a bike ride is exactly what you need to push past your current comfort zone.

Comfortable situations don’t inspire growth; they encourage complacency. Whether you’re looking at your job, your relationship or your physical state of being, when you slip into comfortable territory, you’ll inevitably stagnate. So venture out of your comfort zone now and again, and rediscover how good discomfort can feel.

Chrissy Scivicque is a writer, nutritionist and career coach. You can find her at EatYourCareer.com, a blog dedicated to helping you create a nourishing professional life.

photo courtesy of Simon Hucko

Blogging about blogging. It has its place, but if that’s all everyone does it can get kind of redundant.

So no, this is not a post about how to blog. Don’t read this if you’re anticipating an article titled “67 Ways to be a Better Blogger.”

What I’d like to talk about is something completely different. It’s about having a reason to blog in the first place. And I think now and again we lose sight of that.

Whatever you blog about, it has a purpose. At least a good blog does, and I’m sure if you read Copyblogger you’re smart enough to know that. So what I want to talk about now is purpose.

The purpose of a blog is to share value, to create community, and to inspire. The way we do that isn’t by sitting at the computer for 8+ hours a day trying to think of better ways to blog. It’s also not about finding ways to blog better, smarter, or faster.

It’s about doing something that matters.

When you go out and do remarkable things, it’s easy to create a compelling blog. When you demonstrate your experience by the life you lead and the actions you take, it’s easy to establish authority. When you deliberately pursue experiences that will challenge you, it’s easy to provide value by sharing your story.

I’m a big believer in blogging and social media. But if all we talk about is how to use Twitter more effectively or write catchier headlines, we’ve kind of lost the point. You can only write so much about the finer points and techniques of the game. At some point, you have to go out there and play it.

So here’s what I propose…

Go out and do something awesome. Then share your story.

Here are some ideas:

• Conduct your own personal experiment. Document it by video and post the results on your blog. How it helps: You establish trust by showing people you are actually doing what you talk about.
• Create a series of case studies of successful people in your niche. But don’t just interview them. Have them mentor you through the process step-by-step. How would they guide you if you were completely new to the topic? How it helps: You build relationships with other influencers and provide your readers with tons of value in the process.
• What are the myths or misconceptions in your practice? Go out and test them, and tell your readers what you find out. How it helps: You build curiosity and gain readership by answering their often thought about questions.
• Conduct a personal challenge that seems ridiculous or impossible. Update people regularly on your progress. How it helps: You attract followers by doing something epic and establish authority by positioning yourself as a leader.
• Help a novice related to your field completely transform. Document their transformation and use it to inspire others. Create a contest to decide who is chosen for the best transformation. How it helps: You build social proof and get others interested in your offerings.

There are a lot of other possibilities to make our blogs compelling. We can diverge and connect with people we wouldn’t normally connect with. If you teach Aikido, study Tai Chi for a while and tell people what you find out. If you’re a chef, go out and visit some organic farms and get a better appreciation for the earth food is grown in. There are a lot of possibilities when you exercise your imagination.

The real key isn’t just to do off-beat things for the sake of it, but to engage in interesting pursuits to grow, create community, and share your story with others.

Here are some examples of people that are doing just that:

• Sean Aiken shared his story about how he worked one job a week for an entire year to find his passion.
• Katie West secretly coordinated outbursts of mass-laughter in public places.
• Michael Roberts stayed active 20 hours a day by eating raw food for 30 days.

These are just a few people that have taken their passion and turned it into a tangible and compelling project.

Learning how to be a better marketer, better blogger, or better Twitter user only goes so far. Of course it’s important. Of course it can make a difference. But if you deliberately choose to pursue interesting paths, most of your marketing becomes automatic. Testing your potential, taking risks, and trailblazing is what will ultimately set you apart.

Trying to be a better blogger is sometimes a waste of time. The finer points might make you more efficient, but they only make a difference when you’re moving in a compelling direction.

A better headline won’t make up for your boring offer. Do something that matters, and let other people worry about whether or not you’re using the right WordPress plugins.

But then you probably got caught up in another loop: desiring not to desire. Which really sucks, because then you don’t just have these pesty desires to worry about, now you’ve got to worry about not desiring on top of that.

I’m going to guess that hasn’t worked for you very well if you’re still reading this.

You were born to desire

The nature of being human is to desire and to have all sorts of preferences, likes, and dislikes. Part of living is an exploration in moving through the contrast and discovering what those personal preferences and dreams are.

But somewhere along the way you were told that it’s not okay to be who you are; that what you are right now isn’t acceptable and that you need to become something. So that led you to think that your desires are wrong, or that they’re the cause of your suffering.

Desires are not the cause of suffering. Unfulfilled expectation causes suffering. And the problem now is that you automatically assume that your desires aren’t okay or won’t be fulfilled, and that’s why they cause you pain. There’s nothing worse than having a desire born within you and to automatically feel a response that it is not possible, or that you shouldn’t have it.

So that’s why you canceled your dreams.

That’s why you thought that maybe the way to happiness is to not have any preferences. To have no desire. To become kind of like an unphased stone-woman that is always content, no matter the circumstances.

Well, we already know that that probably isn’t working very well. Because you can’t stop having desires. You can’t change your own nature.

So, what if we could find a way to uncancel our dreams?

Give yourself permission to desire again

A long time ago, before you were told that desires were wrong, you followed all of your desires freely. It was then that you were joyful and undomesticated. You didn’t worry about whether or not your desires were right or wrong. Most of the time when you followed your desires and did what you wanted to do, you were happy and fulfilled. And even though sometimes you followed your desires and things didn’t turn out the way you had expected, you were okay with that. It didn’t make you think that what you thought was wrong, or that it wasn’t okay to do what you want. You just moved onto the next joyful exploration on your path.

It may have been a long time ago and difficult to remember, but if that’s the way things once were for you, then you know it’s possible for it to be that way again.

The problem is that your heart and mind have become divided. They used to work together to help you achieve your desires. But now the voice of practicality is drowning out the heart, and it can’t compete for your attention.

Realigning your heart and mind

You’re going to have to find a way to guide your heart back out of the dungeon it’s been put in, and reform its proper relationship with your mind.

I struggled with this problem for a lot of years. I thought it was better to stomp out desire, to cut the throat of desire. I made it my enemy and thought getting rid of it was the only way to find happiness.

After all, if I had no preference, anything could make me happy, right?

As you can guess, that didn’t work very well. I sacrificed my happiness for a long time before I found a way to reconnect my heart and mind.

When I started talking to other people about the way I created this reuniting, it became really apparent to me how many people out there were struggling with the same thing.

Last year, it led me to me to write Reclaim Your Dreams, so I could help people with this problem. The positive feedback I got from it was overwhelming, and I was thrilled to see how many people put into practice the counterintuitive advice I shared in it. By giving up, undomesticating themselves, and redefining the way they related to desire, people started reclaiming their dreams.

But some of my ideas about the most effective path to making this work changed in the past year and a half. So I’ve spent the past month revising, expanding, updating, and making this guide even more powerful than ever before.

So, now I want to offer it to you here. If you want to…

• uncancel your dreams
• start following a heart-centered path
• and do something that makes you come alive

… then this is guide meant for you.

Here’s where you can get the new Reclaim Your Dreams.

You’ll probably also have to deal with people around you that aren’t very supportive. And you have to find a way to support yourself financially while you follow your passion.

All of this stuff can feel a bit overwhelming.

Last week I asked people if they would be interested in a teleclass / hangout session / Q&A call on this topic. I was a bit surprised by the amount of people that responded. It seems like a lot of people struggle to find the courage to follow their dreams.

So, I’d like to invite you to come hang out with me this Wednesday, so we can figure out a way to make this not a problem anymore. Sure, you still might be apprehensive about following your dreams after this call, but at least you’ll have the inspiration to take action anyway.

Teleclass details:

What: A free teleclass on How to Find the Courage to Follow Your Dreams
When: Wednesday, July 21st at 4pm PT, 7pmET
How long: About an hour.
Who: Myself and you
Why: So you can stop letting fear keep you from following your dreams

The first part of the call I’ll talk about some ways you can overcome this fear, and start living from a more empowered place. The second part of the call we’ll spend answering questions. You’ll be able to ask me anything about:

• How to follow your passion even when you think it’s not practical
• Dealing with critics and people that aren’t supportive of your dreams
• Creating the environment that makes achieving your dreams easier
• How to find the time to work toward your dreams
• What it takes to make a living from your passion
• And whatever else you want to ask me!

Sound good? Oh and even if you can’t make the call, sign up below and we’ll make sure to send you the recording.

Sign up for the free teleclass:

Look forward to seeing and hanging out with you on the call. It’s going to be a lot of fun.

What most people don’t realize is that the vast majority of our beliefs about the world are not really true “out there.” They are only true because we’ve decided they are, albeit we likely haven’t done so consciously.

Beliefs are formed through repeated thoughts, and the only reason they hold any weight is because you’ve decided or agreed that they are true.

There are a lot of collective limiting beliefs that you’ve probably agreed to:

• Work must be a chore
• Marriage turns you into a boring old person
• Time is money
• Once you’re an adult, life is about responsibilities, not fun
• Dreams are not practical

And there are probably a lot of personally acquired limiting beliefs you’ve collected through your own unique experiences. Whatever the case, most beliefs are formed unconsciously, without our knowing about it. We didn’t necessarily decide to agree to these beliefs because we wanted to.

It’s not like one day we woke up and thought “Man, you know what would be awesome? To go out today and repeat a bunch of thoughts that are going to turn into hard and fast conclusions that will keep me from experiencing the life I want. Yeah, I think that’s what I’ll do today.”

That would obviously be ridiculous.

None of us want to keep these beliefs, but we either think:

1. That’s just the way things are (everyone else agrees), or…
2. It’s become such a part of my identity that it’s too hard to change now

In order to solve the first problem, we need to realize that what is often seen as “just the way things are” is, in reality, just a collective assumption. And because it’s an assumption, that means that we decided to agree to make that assumption as well, on some conscious or unconscious level.

In that case, we need to reclaim our power, and choose to stop agreeing. It can really be that simple.

When it comes to ingrained limiting beliefs, patterns, or habits, these can be a bit harder to change. Because we’re so used to them — and mostly because we identify with them — they hold a lot of weight in our experience. It can almost feel as if they’re immovable objects on our path.

Some common limiting beliefs are…

• The feeling of not being enough
• The feeling of not having enough
• Having to work hard for money
• Not deserving success
• [insert your limiting belief here]

These things can seem daunting to try to change. And even when you do make a real, consistent effort, inertia is often just too hard to overcome.

Luckily, there are a few steps you can follow in order to make the shift to new, more empowering beliefs.

1. Stop identifying with the belief. Most beliefs are so difficult to change because we identify with them. They seem to be ingrained as a part of who we are. And because we identify with them, we allow ourselves to be defined by them. If you think you’re not creative, you’ll see yourself as someone who just wasn’t born with that ability. If you think you’re bad with getting things to work, you might think you’re just not a mechanical person. It’s easy to get caught up in allowing our beliefs to define us, but they don’t have to. So the first step is to stop identifying with or defining yourself based on what you believe.
2. Kill your conclusions. Whatever you think you know to be certain is probably a lot more flexible than you think. What you think to be required is certain to be much more negotiable. Question all of the conclusions you have about what you think to be true, fixed or possible.
3. Test your assumptions. Without pushing the boundary and testing your assumptions, it’s impossible to move past your limiting beliefs. You need to do something to break the pattern of your limiting belief. Questioning is the first step, but if you only do that, the possibilities of moving to a more empowering perspective stay in your head. Some type of action must be taken that puts your conclusions to the test. Just make sure that you’re not staying in the limited head-space that leads you to reinforce what you already hold to be true. Suspend your judgment and take some kind of action to test your assumptions.

It might seem simple, but these are the basic steps to moving past any limiting belief.

They’re only part of it, though. In order to really integrate a new, more empowering belief, you’ll need to spend time cultivating it. And it can help to go through a structured process to dissolve the limit.

I’ve developed a technique that helps you rip a hole in the fabric of your limiting beliefs so you can begin unraveling the limit. Once it has dissolved, you can transform it into a powerful, self-enhancing belief.

You can download this free tool to help you overcome your limiting beliefs here.

It’s called The Limit Erasing Technique. Magic wand not included. :)

If you think you could use some help moving past a belief that’s been keeping you from getting the results you want, then this will definitely help.

It’s time to say goodbye. Go here if you want to break your limits.

photo courtesy of Michael Sarver