I'm Just MK

words

2017-01-23T13:46:00.004-06:00

How does one choose something important to write, worthy of the eyes of others? When our life was a journey, moving to the Midwest, words flowed like water. Pain jumped onto the page and typed the very keys themselves. But I felt the burn of people's views of me when they voiced some things and referenced my blog entries. I should say that by no means are the words that fall here my whole entire life. Most of this stuff is just in my head. Things I feel but, don't say out loud. Have I endured some difficult days where I felt" whoa is me"? Yeah, haven't we all? Have I spoken freely about heartache and heartbreak? Definitely. Have I listed blessings and grace? Yes.

These days, I've got better things to do. I learned long ago that people are going to take away what they want and if they only see me for the words I leave here, well they're missing out on a whole whole lot. These days, I spend my moments investing in my husband, my children, my family and last but, not least my friends. It's way more product. I don't have the turmoil and grief I once had with the process of moving far, far away and being separated from so many people I love.

In fact, since we've returned I've made peace with a lot of things. Myself, mostly. There's lots of guilt that comes from a messy childhood and teenage years. There's guilt that comes with motherhood and I think I struggle greatest with that at the moment. It's nothing I need to expound on, thanks for your concern though.

I appreciate you stopping by from time to time but, unless I decided to make a career out of blogging, you'll only catch me around here from time to time. From the way it looks, once (twice if you're lucky) a year. Maybe once our house is done and all my babes are off to school and I'm having friends over to discuss a bible study and keep me sane. Maybe then I'll come around more often. (Probably not though. Let's all be honest.) I dare to be real here, to speak with such poignancy or honesty. I fear the thoughts that would pierce one's mind about the kind of person I am. People think nothing of tearing each other apart these days. There's no limits, no thoughts about encouraging and building each other up.

Love one another as I have loved you. I fail at it daily in the stinkin' pickup line at school, of all places. (Way to be a role model.) Ugh, I can't stand it when kids don't walk in the crosswalk, straight out in front of my car they run. Or when parents think they're the only one with places to be. I've been working on it, I just laugh (as I say mean things under my breath). Yep, working on that too. Always a work in progress. (I'd like to think I'm getting better with age?) Micah Tyler probably puts it best in his song, "Never been a moment" when he sings, "I've been a sinner. I've been a saint. A little bit of both, every single day." Story of my life.

What to do when motherhood's through with you?

2016-05-24T14:08:00.002-05:00

It's no secret we have 3 outstanding, bright, beautiful children. We've also had 3 miscarriages. The second one was really hard. We were about 12 weeks in when the midwife still couldn't find a heartbeat. She said not to worry but, deep down, I knew something was wrong. I called her after my appointment and told her of my concern. Understanding as she was, she ordered an ultrasound at a local hospital. The tech immediately informed me she couldn't give any results. We would have to wait for the radiologist to read them and send the report to our doctor. (Well, NUTS!) I called my midwife and she, in turn, called the hospital to get them. Not long after, she called me with sadness and told me our baby had stopped growing at 8 weeks 4 days but, my body, naturally, taking longer to catch up, hadn't figured this out yet and everything else, the placenta etc., had grown to 10 weeks.

All my hopes and dreams for this baby, all the wishes and plans I'd made all went out the door. That was the saddest for me, letting go of our dreams. My husband was so excited, he'd already begun telling people (to my dismay). So, to pile more tears on, we had to "un-tell" people.

Have you ever found that it's easier to grieve the loss of someone or some thing by yourself or with the closest to you? I do but, no, we had to rehash our grief again and again and again. It surely didn't make things any easier. I didn't want to hear people say, "I'm sorry for your loss." I wanted to contain my grief in a little box and stuff it way, way under the bed, in the very back corner.

Then, there was the actual miscarriage. We opted to do that at home and not have a D&C, which was a little tricky being that far along. It scared me, I'm not going to lie. On top of sorrow and grief was fear. And then the bleeding. It didn't stop for 8 weeks. My hCG levels weren't falling fast enough and they were worried about that. I kept going back and back and back. I was a mess mentally and physically for a great long while.

Jump to present day and we're here again in the land of sorrow. I'd known that my OB doctor was retiring and so, I'd begun the search for a new doctor. I'd figured out a birth plan. I'd thought about names (though only for a second.) Because my husband and I had been pretending all along that this pregnancy wasn't happening. We were cautious. We didn't dare tell a soul. We even gasped when the other might bring it up at night after everyone was in bed, fast asleep. We knew there was an "if". A chance that things wouldn't be.

Again. I knew something wasn't right. I hadn't decided on a doctor yet therefore, we hadn't seen a doctor but, there were signs. Signs that things weren't quite right. So, after some really obvious signs and a good ahead from my retiring doctor's office (he was away on vacation) I went to the ER. They confirmed my suspicions. This baby grew to 6 weeks 1 day, My body was currently 10 weeks 2 days.

I had a few moments when I broke down. Tears flooded my eyes and spilled down my cheeks but, all along I knew God was with us. I knew no matter the outcome, tomorrow would be bright and full of promise. That he would pull us through. He had in the past and he would again. There's so much promise in his word.

Psalm 30:5 – Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning.

Matthew 5:4 – Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.

John 16:33 – “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

Philippians 4:7 – And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Isaiah 40:31 – but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

James 1:4 – Let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.

Joshua 1:9 – Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.

Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Psalms 46:1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.

The list goes on and on and on. Reading through these scriptures in troubled times gives me assurance that no matter my struggles and sorrow here on earth, the best is yet to come.

playing catchup

2016-02-22T12:11:00.001-06:00

With wisdom comes much sorrow, I heard Chuck Swindoll say this morning. Boy, he's got that right but, then again, he quoted it from the bible - Ecclesiastes 1:18.

With sorrow I never find myself on here anymore. (Ok, not really.) I've learned that with 3 kids, a household to button down and lots of opportunities in ministry plus, plus, plus my time is valuable. I enjoy coming back here from time to time, say once every 6 months or more. I catch up, see what my favorite bloggers are doing and how much their kids have grown. It's kinda silly when you think about it but, I've learned lots from their pages so there's an odd connection. Call me weird.

My kids are growing like weeds. One in high school, one in elementary, and one still here at home. They take up a grand amount of time. Scooting them off to youth group activities, sports, school functions. I still find time for myself. Bible study, two or three times a week. Crazy, I know but, wasn't Jesus' love for us scandalous? Absolutely! So I'll take scandalous love of bible study and Jesus any day. Breakfast with friends, that's turning itself into an entrepreneurial thing. I laugh with disbelief every time we're together. Oh! And I'm getting ready for a trip to TN. All in the name of furthering my Southern Heritage and bonding.

You know road trips ~~are~~ aren't my thing. I like structured activities, knowing what I'm going to be doing. We do have somewhat of a plan. I also prefer flat road driving vs. mountainous. But, Thelma's going. It's sure to be a blast! Eight hours in the car together. Eight hours is all she can handle in a day's time, so we're pushing it. Still. Time with Thelma is always well spent. Stay tuned, I'll put up some crazy pictures of our escapade in the coming months.

a different lens

2015-11-16T09:35:00.001-06:00

As minutes become hours, hours become days, I see life through a different lens. One that realizes my time here is fleeting, my life is half over and what to do with the rest of it?

In high school, when asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I answered truthfully, "a chef". Mrs. Wolfolk, the guidance counselor gave me a smirk. "That's not a 'real' job", flashed into my head. Ok, IT it is. And so, I have a crumby degree in IT that I will never do a thing with. Lesson learned. Be you.

Years later, God is still using my gift and love of food to minister to others. I am perfect in Him. Degree or no degree.

In high school, so much emphasis is put on sports these days. Really, when I look back at my high school years and the sports I played, so much is trivial. So much. I don't remember the softball tournaments we won in our parks and recs division or what great plays I made on the JV team or how many girls I struck out during my first varsity game. When I look back, I remember being in relationship with my teammates. My friends. I recall fun times with them. Car rides. Bus trips. Giggles. Singing "Thank you LORD" as we pulled into the school parking lot late at night. I remember people. And isn't that what this life is about?

My baby girl is growing up and will soon be off to college. Our influence into her world is coming to a close. She'll make her own decisions, vote for public officials according to her vision for the future, wash clothes and mess them up, burn Hamburger Helper. She'll be her own. Set out from the nest to make her way. I've learned that doing the fun things - shopping, little trips to town with extras - coffee or ice cream, are the times I'll remember. Not really ever remembering what those things were but, memories of our time spent together.

Our whole lives are centered around being in relationship, forgiveness and people. Relationship with the LORD, relationship with His people. Forgiving as He forgave, and forgives us daily. Being ambassadors of Christ.

So many times, I forget I'm an ambassador. In the school pickup line when I want to rant about the people who got their license from Kmart. Or how the school officials get under my skin with their arrogance. Even people driving with no lights on when it rains. How forgiving of them am I? What am I teaching my children by being disgruntled over the small things? Behold, there's a world of God's majesty in front of our eyes if we would just focus our lens a bit differently.

For instance, glance the morning light during the different seasons - in fall, it's a beautiful golden yellowish-orange; in winter, it's a cool blue-gray. Look at a sleeping child and see the face of an angel. Taste a homegrown strawberry and taste God's glory. If you've never read "One Thousand Gifts" by Ann Voskamp, I encourage you to do so. It will open your eyes to a different light, a way of seeing God, face to face this side of heaven.

There will be phases, I know, but I pray we will always return to the light. To seeing His presence in everyday life. That we wouldn't dwell in the darkness but, learn to embrace those times as we draw close to him. 2 Corinthians 12:9 says... But he said to me, "My Grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

doughnut do this at home

2014-03-01T17:42:00.000-06:00

Let's talk food. A couple weeks ago, I saw all these pins for homemade doughnuts.

This girl likes some doughnuts ya'll.

Ok, let's all be honest here, what don't I like?

There's not much.

So I did my homework and I looked at all the recipes, the ingredients, the effort. I was in. What's a girl to do but, get online and order a doughnut pan! It arrived and I was stoked to make my first pan of cake doughnuts.

You know, start off easy with cake doughnuts, then work up to the yeast doughnuts that call for the extra work of rising and frying, etc., etc.

So I opened up the fridge to find I'd used my last stick of butter with not a spare left in the freezer.

Aaaaaah!

Well Handsome Husband came to my rescue and was picking up a few things from the store for me so I added butter to the list. Little did I know, that our week would grow increasingly busier and there wouldn't be a minute of time left to make doughnuts.

I mean, doughnuts are on my list of frivolous foods. Just not necessary, more a treat than a healthy, power-packed breakfast.

Here we are, weeks later and the doughnut pan that I tracked and waited days to get, has been washed, dried and put away.

Today, I've had a real craving for doughnuts but, to make a long story short...Miss K took on the challenge to cut sugar out of her diet for 10 days.

Yes, she's 13.
No, she's not overweight or whatever else would run through one's mind.
This was a challenge from her history book.

Here's the background...When Daniel was captured and later "taken in" by Nebuchadnezzar, he was offered the finest of foods but, he had a hunch the meats were probably sacrificed to false gods and such, so he refused to eat them and instead ate only fruits and vegetables. So the challenge was to try giving up sugar (something that's super serious if you're a kid - kind of like steak is to men. See where I'm going here?) for ten days. I have to give it to her, homegirl's stuck with it. I would've said, "Yep, tried this for an hour or three. Now I'm done."

My willpower is weak like that.

So, my poor little doughnut pan sits patiently in the cabinet, awaiting the day when I'll take it out and actually cook a doughnut or six (or twenty-four). And maybe I'll try not to eat a pan full while the others cook. wink.

to catch you up to speed

2014-02-24T16:44:00.002-06:00

Hi there! Long time, no see...guilty as charged! It's been four score and seven years ago since I even logged into my blog. Handsome Husband's given me nudges, "you need to go back to it, you need to write something." I just haven't had the time, the words, the energy. Home school takes a great majority of my time these days and after we're done with a day's work, I'll be honest, I just want to crash before I go about my usual duties of cleaning house, making dinner, blah, blah, blah. Just want to relax, find some "me" time in all the hub-bub of our busy day.

Lots of things have happened since I last logged in here! Let's see...

Miss K turned into a teenager overnight. Just kidding, she did hit the big 1-3 though.

Hmmm, what else??

I would tell you I've been enjoying all of the snow and blustery weather we've had here in Illinois BUT, I'd be lying. I'm completely convinced that my body is incapable of producing body heat and therefore, made to live in a warmer climate. hint, hint. These days, I'm just happy to see the sun shine and luckily, our living room is a great place for soaking up the rays.

Seems like some of the most important men in my life are enjoying warmer weather at the moment. One is in Panama where its currently in the 90's. Another is in New Mexico, headed west to Cali. Can I just say, can I?...You men make me sick! No offense, of course.

How are things on the spiritual home front?, you ask. I'm patient, I'm faithful, that The Good Lord has a plan for us. (There's growth! I have ~~not always~~ never been patient! Not always faithful and trusting either.) As always, I don't know what the plan is but, I know it's perfect and will come in His time.

What I will tell you, is that I'm prepared to move on. Again, no offense. But, this place is just not for us. While, I'm not homesick anymore, I still long to sip sweet tea in the hilly - preferably mountainous, but I'm not choosy - south from a tall cool glass, I long to hear the word y'all and yes ma'am, I long to be a little closer to family.

It's easier to come "home" these days. I don't cry when we leave Virginia anymore. At least I didn't when we left after Christmas. That was a first! Not even after a crazy journey back where our trailer blew a tire mere hours into said journey, having to replace all the tires on the trailer (a major unexpected expensive - right after Christmas I might add - I never knew trailer tires were so expensive!!) And, it set us back 2 hours. All the while, we had to hang out in Wal-Mart for the aforementioned two hours and eat McDonald's for lunch while dealing with a sick child. Nope, not a tear. You should be proud.

Life calls, I'll try to return soon. No promises.

the view from here

2013-09-20T16:37:00.001-05:00

The Man lost his two front teeth on a hot summer afternoon a month or so ago. Since then, he's been terribly insistent that we not take pictures of him smiling. So, while he was working away, I tried my darnedest to snap a photo of him. He was hard at work when he heard the cl-click of my camera and then he saw me slyly holding it, pointed in his direction. Three words, folks, he. freaked. out. "No! Mom, don't take my picture!" I kindly put it down and took out the remote. He noticed but didn't object. So, when I started snapping again, I caught a glimpse of a half-smile, half-WHAT-ON-EARTH-ARE-YOU-DOING?! face. He's tried ever since to thieve my camera and delete said photo(s). Lucky for me, they're downloaded to my laptop and the rest is history.

Tell me, please, why a mama can't have a picture of her favorite son missing his toofies? OK, so he's the only son. Is there any harm in it really? 'Course not.

while i'm here

2013-09-17T22:21:00.000-05:00

We have some special friends in Albania. Although I wish we could've spent more time with them, we had the opportunity to enjoy them while they were here.

Well, Miss Ellie is a big fan of frogs. And it just so happens we've been finding little frogs on our windows (in at least two rooms!) every night. Not on the inside of course, but on the outside and from having the lights on, they are feasting on the tastiest tiny moths and other bugs attracted by the light. (I guess moths are tasty - to frogs.)

Since I'm here and had a minute, I thought I'd post these for you Ellie! Plus a couple others, not of frogs though.

I tried my best to get some shots of these guys in action grabbing a bug or two but, I couldn't. So, here's what I did get...

One of him (or her?) climbing up to get a moth.

Excuse the dirty windows! I'm finding windows don't stay clean long in Illinois
because the wind is always blowing stuff on them, ugh!
Not to mention climbing frogs!

Oh boy, a close up! Look at those suction-y toes!

And a praying mantis (that was actually hanging upside down from the roof but,

for easier viewing, I rotated the photo.)

Lastly, a cicada. I found him quietly enjoying the sunrise one morning.

He's a strange looking guy! Ha! Looks like he has whiskers!

Hope you're enjoying your adventureous new life in Albania!

life is a whirlwind

2013-09-17T21:51:00.002-05:00

I always catch a bunch of flack for never being here. Well, truth be told, I am extremely busy at the moment. Thankyouverymuch. I take homeschooling tremendously serious. We have a routine down and while not every day is peaches and cream, the bad ones aren't horrific either. So, here's a rundown of what else you've missed...

1. Partying. We hosted a "potato digging party" where we, along with lots of friends, dug seven 30 foot rows of potatoes.

Is this a southern thing, you ask? This potato digging party? Well, no. No, it's not. It was the idea of a friend. We served hot dogs and drinks while they brought sides and desserts. We dug potatoes, we ate, we shared the starchy treasure. Everyone was happy.

2. Potatoes. We've been processing potatoes. Seems our friends weren't all that experienced in the potato digging department and we missed the memo that said "Instruct before you send the laborers into the field". So, there were quite a few cut potatoes. As in, we have 20+ pounds of shredded hash browns sitting in our freezer alone. Friends took some cut potatoes too, so who knows how many there were!

3. Cleaning. Homeschool takes half my day, at least, and then, there's cleaning. Who wants to do it? Yeah, me neither but, somebody has to. So, that gets done here and there and on the weekends now.

4. Extra-curricular activities. Miss K does sports through the school she attends for Spanish. Then, there's 4-H.

5. Apples. We are blessed with an apple and a pear tree here and so, that's next on my long list of daunting tasks.

6. Rhubarb. It sits on the edge of the garden waiting to be harvested, processed and packaged into the freezer, then, later, made into strawberry-rhubarb jam. We finished round one earlier in the summer. Round two awaits.

7. Furniture. There's a bookshelf and a desk in the garage, ever so patiently waiting to be primed and painted but, I have yet to find the time to get that done.

8. Freezer. We finally found a nice gently used freezer on Craigslist to store our harvest in and so, of course that took the trip to get, clean and move into the basement.

9. Sofa. We've decided that the best option for our school room slash craft room slash guest room is a sofa. Not just any sofa but, one of the pull-out bed sort. One that Miss K has big plans to lounge on while she reads. I have the feeling she's going to claim it as her own! Therefore, we're on the hunt for the perfect couch for our cozy little space.

10. Birthday. The Man is coming upon his seventh birthday and we're planning a fun little weenie roast-bonfire type deal. He wants to go big on the food. He's a food snob as Handsome Husband would call it. We all are in this household. Anyway, that's in the makings.

11. Sewing. Yes, it's done! Miss D should've received her package yesterday. Goodies for the ladies' retreat special speakers have arrived! While I was working on those (and I can't specify exactly what because it's a surprise!) I decided that I wanted to venture into making some cloth napkins. I hate paper napkins and you just buy them and keep buying them over and over and the landfills all choke on trash daily. So, why not go green and switch over. Which leads to #12...

12. Cloth Napkins. I've begun. I've sewn 2 complete napkins. Then, I ran out of the coordinating thread! So, I had to stop and haven't found the time yet to pick them back up. It'll get done. Slowly but, surely!

I guess that's it.

Oh golly! How could I forget?!

13. Tomatoes. We have hoards of tomatoes coming in. I haven't the time to can them at the moment and so, my plan is to blanch them, freeze them, process later!

Might I add, I was so excited all of my Cherokee Purple tomatoes made it! They taste the best too. The Mortgage Lifters were fine, just not as good.

Alright, the bed calls. My eyelids are growing heavy and it's sadly only 9:33. No joke y'all. It's a sad, sad life I live, I tell ya. wink.

homeschool and beef stew?

2013-09-06T19:46:00.000-05:00

I know I've talked a bit lately about the homeschool roller coaster. Well, I want to update you on how that's all going...FANTASTIC! We have a morning routine down and so far, things are moving along well with no hiccups to mention. Everyone has fallen into this routine so well, I can hardly believe we're doing this, making it happen, conquering the fears of homeschool. In another post, I'll go into details about the books we've chosen and what we're using.

A while back (like a few months ago!) I was asked if we'd made anything out of the Pioneer Woman's cookbooks. Well, I'd just received them before we left for our "Summer Tour" and I think I'd made maybe one recipe...salsa. Since then, we've been enthusiastically tackling recipe after glorious recipe.

Tonight was no different. While the weather's hovered around 90, we giggled at the thought of eating beef stew!

I ran out late this afternoon to get some groceries and items we needed for science experiments and when I arrived home it was near 3:30. The meat needed to cook for 2 hours! I thought we were seriously dead meat! snort. Although I ended up shortening the time by a half hour, it was still so rich and tender! It's a keeper!

Look out fall! We're comin' with guns a blazin'!

We've also tried...

Egg-In-The-Hole

We've been making these for years. Need I say they're good?

Make-Ahead Muffin Melts

The kids weren't fans and Handsome Husband and myself thought they were just OK. I'm not a hater. You, my friend, might love them!

Basic Chicken Salad

Miss K and I loved this! The men folk weren't too kind to it but, the man did at least try it.

Restaurant-Style Salsa

Mmmm, favored by all!

Quesadillas de Camarones

a.k.a. Shrimp Quesadillas. Oh Lord help me! This is my favorite Mexican meal in the world! And so, I love it and Handsome Husband is fond of it too. I think?

Spicy Dr. Pepper Pulled Pork

We already have a favorite pulled pork recipe and so it's an unfair competition. My kids aren't too fond of lots of spice so, sorry, our fave wins. It's still good though!

Beef Stew

'Nough said already.

Whiskey-Glazed Carrots

Oh yum! We do like these. And yes, the whiskey is necessary. They're good!

Macaroni and Cheese

The man isn't fond of this because he's hooked on box mac'n'cheese...I think I just threw up in my mouth a little. I love this, it takes me back. It's comfort food.

PW's Creamy Mashed Potatoes

These are so creamy and good. We could live off these.

Strawberry Shortcake Cake

This is good too. But read further...

Coffee Cream Cake

This is the man's absolute favorite and it's a crowd pleaser even if you don't love coffee. I've been told this more than once. The man asks for Coffee Cream Cake every week. Serious y'all.

Coffee Ice Cream

Dear God, this is the best thing on earth. Can you please serve it in heaven? Miss K asks for this almost weekly. P, we have to make Coffee Ice Cream when you come.

Chocolate Sheet Cake

You'll absolutely perish if you don't eat at least 3 spoonfuls (or more) of this icing. One of Miss K's friends told me she hates icing but, she wants this for her birthday!

ma' plate's full

2013-08-29T08:40:00.000-05:00

There are but mere minutes before the crew of 5 arrive to hang out for a bit whilst their mother accomplishes needed shopping for a large yearly fundraiser. I've let my two sleep in. School will start on Tuesday and they've been up early in training for our new schedule.

My plate feels quite full but, I am managing to keep the butterflies and craziness from creeping in. Taking each day as it comes and checking off tasks here and there.

It's funny how God steps in, taking over and orchestrating things as he sees fit. For instance, I felt that house cleaning had taken a back seat and I'd fallen behind on my cleaning duties. Yesterday after breakfast, I received word that the appraiser would be coming at 3:00. I was already in cleaning mode but, I rallied the troops, gave them the pep talk and we combed the place, having it almost completely finished by 11am. I didn't worry about what lay undone. I took Miss K + 3 to Spanish, purchased a used book shelf, caught up with friends and after lunch, we resumed. It was all done before Mr. Appraiser arrived, with time to spare.

Homeschool stuff is just about ready and it's not the lingering book or two that has yet to arrive that worries me. No, it's the calendar. My weekly schedule does not have each block filled in. I know what we're doing and some of it lays empty because the books have just arrived but, I yearn to see things on paper. To have a guide, even if it's not set. in. stone. Plus, there's just the fear of the unknown. Remember, we're new to this but, I'm high on the homeschooling roller coaster!

Groceries. Tomorrow is grocery shopping day. I've finally figured out the menu for the month and the long list of rations we'll need to make it through. Now, just to do it! Check that one off.

Tomorrow's the first day of the Fall Festival. This is a big deal. Our church's ladies' group puts on a bake sale for the Fall Festival and it's their only fundraiser for the entire year. Since, it's the end of the month and I have yet to get groceries, well, I have yet to start my baking.

Then, there's the ladies' retreat in mid-September. We have a lot of, lot of things going on and then, there's my cousin's wedding in October. So, I wish I could but, ladies, I won't be there for the retreat. I know Miss D always thinks I'm gonna surprise her and show up, and one of these days I will. Anyway, I have special gifts to make for the guest speakers but, here, all my fabric lay.

It makes me anxious. The date is quickly approaching and this stuff needs get done and shipped by mid-month. I'll get to it after the weekend. And as soon as homeschool is under control. Eek! The world is closing on me!

There is so much more...benches to polyurethane, a desk that needs to be refinished, a book shelf to sand and paint, drawers to line, etc. etc. You get the point. So many things. Too much to write. They will all be accomplished. In good time. But that doesn't change the fact that they are on my plate. And the plate's feelin' full y'all.

Now to get to some of my list...

determined

2013-08-19T08:42:00.006-05:00

There's lots on my agenda today. Tonight's the third Monday meal at church and I have brownies, a cake, 4 dozen rolls and a cheesy potato casserole to make. This morning, I got up after I just couldn't take it anymore. Daisy whined for an hour and I was determined that I was not going to give in to this morning ritual that starts right after Handsome Husband leaves. She was not going to control me. There are days when I wish we had no animals. Whatsoever. I'm feeling grumpy from head to toe.

More homeschool books should arrive today and I'm praying that they all get here before our actual start date which is currently unknown. I thought maybe we could start when public school started here but, I'm not sure that it's possible to start without your books and such. Looking like it'll be after Labor Day which makes me a little frantic because that just seems like centuries away and not "normal".

I like normal. I like boring. I like routine. Have I ever mentioned that? Yes, I live a fantastic mundane life. No worries. I like it that way. So, when the rest of the world is starting school towards the end of August, I want to too. I'll get over it, sooner or later. I do worry though, that our children will hate homeschool. With a passion. And I worry that I will hate homeschool. With a passion.

Worries aside, I am determined that we will not hate homeschool. Determined.

just a few things on friday...

2013-08-16T13:28:00.001-05:00

The weather couldn't be any better. For the last week, we've had our windows open and it's been in the 70's. Maybe for once, just once, this feels like God's country.

I sit quietly at this desk inside of our breezy, warm kitchen. Everything is peaceful and pleasant but, just an hour ago, the kitchen was booming with 8 small mouths to feed, chatter and laughter flowing in every direction around a nine foot table.

Last night, we hosted half the W brood while the Mr. & Mrs. went on a little getaway and it's quite a time when they're here. Legos, ships, cars, cards, and girl talk can be found all over the house. We enjoy these times when kick-the-can lasts forever, freeze pops flow abundantly from the fridge as the night closes in and dirty little toes scurry towards the bathtub at dusk.

Miss K and the man headed over to the neighbors after the lunch flurry was over and everyone'd gone home. The neighbors cat had kittens and it's the talk of the neighborhood. Luckily, the neighborhood kids play well together and they've spent plenty of time holding these tiny mewing babes as they first begin to open their eyes.

There's a trickle of homeschool materials slowly arriving and we're so excited to open packages, scour through and place them lovingly on a shelf until time to actually use them! This new adventure is finally becoming more and more of a reality. Fear has up and left (least for now) and thrill sinks into our hearts and minds. I have a couple more books to order but, other than that, we're ready. Miss K is also signed up to take Spanish at a local Christian school, allowing her to participate in sports there.

Anyone looking for Miss K, please note her electronic privileges have been taken but she'll be back on soon. Oh, and P, I totally forgot to send you vacations photos! Loading them now! I didn't pull out my camera til the end of the week, so there aren't many photos but, here're a couple of my favorites...

Have a great weekend!

ya thunk i'd up & left, did ya?

2013-08-12T01:06:00.001-05:00

Not knowing I needed, and would, I took the summer off from blogging. A hiatus of sorts. Time to wade through heavy issues like homeschooling, a month of "vacation", blogger photo issues (which seem to be resolved, praise GOD!) and an unexpected trip back. We've spent lots of time in the pool, on bikes and with friends. It's all coming to a close as I make final decisions on homeschooling curricula and the littles spend their last week and a half surrounding themselves with their bestest of besties. (At least those here in IL.)

With that being said, I'll try to pack in as many photos as possible because you know how I love a photo-filled post. wink wink.

So, when I mentioned homeschool did you shake your head in disbelief? I've ridden a roller coaster of emotions for the last 3 months - complete terror, peace, and brain-riddling confusion. I've always said I wasn't the homeschooling type but, to sacrifice for the greater good, I. AM. HOMESCHOOLING. There, I said it! It's been the range of curricula that has sent my head spinning. So much to choose from, so many different avenues.

Ever watch "Children of the Corn"? Sorry, I had to.

Don't try that at home! Ya can't tell dangerous non-helmet wearin' boys nothin'!

After visiting with a friend and seeing her homeschooling "library", hearing her homeschooling stories and encouragement I felt better. She's seen it all and done it all. Well, almost! Friend gave me direction and the kids were able to look through and get a feel for the materials they had to choose from. Yes, homeschool is about choice. A blessing and a curse if you ask me...because I'm indecisive.

I learned some things, Miss K is happiest with classical style learning...here's the lesson; the work; do it. She's very independent and creative. I can't wait to see how this year goes for her. The man, oh the man. I worry about this guy. He's bull-headed and he's going through a whining phase. Did I mention he's got me wrapped around his finger? It's true. He's the one I might lose sleep over. Such is life.

So, I never finished our Summer Tour series. I have more pictures (not as many as I wish I had) but I'll get to it. Slowly but surely. Just a little caught up in the thick of things right now. Who ever said "summer is for relaxing" was crazy! Our summer has been a flurry of kids in and out of the house; up and down the roads we go, burnin' rubber; trying lots of new recipes; soaking up rays by the pool and finding inexpensive summer fun. It's been good, it's been fun but, I'll be glad when we find our groove and settle in to a new routine.

We were sooooo excited to host some visitors last week. Some our best friends from home were here. And although their stay was way too short and hindered by an out-of-the-blue migraine, we made the best of it. Kids romped all over the yard and into the cornfields. (Yes, a lecture followed on how unsafe that is. Luckily, bigger kids teamed up and looked out for the littles and everyone came home safely.) We ate like kings and queens, making a breakfast feast of homemade waffles with caramel syrup and local maple syrup, sausage, breafas luvin' muffins, and tons of fruit. Poor Thelma could barely eat due to her aching head but, we ended on a high note Wednesday night with Uncle T's famous ribs. The next day, we followed them south to the third leg of their trip. That's where we had the opportunity to take the girls and do a little before school shopping at the outlet mall. Woohoo, yay for a girls day and the perfect way to end our time together!

No, the man did not go shopping! He seems to be somewhat of a mama's boy and he wanted to ride with the girls, while Thelma drove her car with the rest of the boys.

Fall promises more visitors and we're gearing up for them as well. Lord I pray, by then, we'll have a routine down and they'll all get to see more of the kids since they won't be "away" at school. There's also an opportunity to help out with the ladies retreat back home. Miss Debbie and I laughed about my title of "emeritus" to their creative group since moving. That's OK, I'm excited to get to work on their project soon.

Alright, it's late and I just wanted to pop in, say I'm still here and I'll see ya around.

summer tour - week one (wagner berry farm)

2013-07-09T08:13:00.001-05:00

Week One was officially over. We spent our week in TN with cousins. SIL had a special outing planned to Wagner Berry Farm where our main focus would be strawberries and rasperries. Unfortunately, the raspberry patch wasn't open just yet but, we still had time to seek out some tasty strawberries.

Photos for Instagram were a must.

And who could resist jumping the rows?

Light saber moments...

The girls shared special time together.

And then it was time to head home.

dinner grits

2013-07-09T08:02:00.000-05:00

Well, I've held off as long as I could. Blogger has completely frazzled my patience for blogging. See, I've been having this ongoing problem {meaning every single post} with posting photos. It's a long story but, if you know me well, you know I despise a photo-less post.

Now, we spent 4 weeks on the road and are finally recovering. We had the best time but, to be completely honest, it was exhausting. We were so excited to see all our family and friends though.

Despite my loathing of photo-less posts, this is one on those. Prepare yourself. While in TN, visiting my SIL and her awesome family, I finally learned to make dinner grits. {swoon} OK, I see the look of doubt on your face, I feel the scorn in your eyes but, for anyone skeptical of grits - dinner grits - please see this as a totally amazing sister to mashed potatoes. And yes, I know, grits are made of corn and potatoes are, well, potatoes. Stay with me here! I would totally give up potatoes vs. grits any day! Well, maybe.

{For seven people, Miss TN doubled the recipe.}

Dinner Grits
3/4 cups grits
1 1/2 cups heavy cream (or half & half)
1 1/2 cups milk
2/3 cup onion
1 clove garlic

Saute onion in butter. Add liquids and cook on medium heat until heated and frothy but not boiling. Pour grits into pan, stirring continuously. Cook 5 min. or more until grits reach desired thickness. Season as desired with salt, pepper, garlic, etc.

See how simple that was? I've converted at least a handful of skeptical grits eaters since! Why wasn't this one of the first things I ever learned to cook? So easy!

be back soon

2013-06-12T22:15:00.001-05:00

Hey there! I'll be back soon. We're "on tour" and loving every minute of it. We'll catch back up this weekend. Promise.

three on thursday.

2013-06-06T09:07:00.003-05:00

1. I'm finding myself a little sentimental today. Not wanting to go. Not wanting to leave. Handsome Husband. The dogs. The garden. Who will care for them? Who will feed them and water them? Clean up after and love them? I know Handsome Husband can fend for himself. I always worry about the dogs. I typed up a long agenda stating how to care for them, about their personalities, how their vaccinations and rabies are up-to-date. I even ordered new dog tags because all the others have our old address. This'll be the first time we've left them since we brought them back at Christmas and while our "caretakers" have dogs, nothing cures my worry. And the garden, isn't it silly? I worry that the plants will need water, that I won't be there to see the first blooms, their first fruits, that the tomatoes will go nuts before I get back. Oh it's silly, I know.

2. I want to finish sewing projects, can the remaining rhubarb and strawberries into jam, make sure the house is spotless. I am so ADHD, ADD, obsessive compulsive. I don't know what I am, I just know I'm one of them.

3. Most of our things are packed. Although, I'm fighting off the urge to call our vacation rental agency and ask our agent, Demetra with her lovely Carolina accent and raspy voice, ten thousand questions. And then pack ten thousand and one more things. I'm an avid over-packer and there are things I want to bring from home (Virginia home) when we return here to the cornfields of Illinois. Cookbooks, muck boots. Oh how I love, love, love muck boots. We have a list and I'm sure we'll find more and more to pack into every little nook and cranny. In any case, I'm just looking forward to familiar ol' faces and sinking my toes in the sand.

Father's Day ideas and printables

2013-06-04T15:49:00.001-05:00

We'll soon be leaving for our "summer tour". So, we needed to prepare our Father's Day gifts a couple weeks ahead of time. I hope you fathers aren't looking!!!!

We found some great ideas on Pinterest and came up with a few of our own. We didn't use some of the printables, but they are available and listed below.

We put Handsome Husband's pack together for under $20...

1. Orbit gum - $2 {for a 3-pk., Wal-Mart}

2. Pistachios (printable from LizzeJane Baby) - $6 {Aldi}

3. Favorite candies (printable from artsy-fartsy mama) - $4.50 {Aldi, Wal-Mart}

4. Cream Soda - $3.50 {Wal-Mart}

5. Reese's Pieces (printables available from Nothing but Country and also Kids, Clutter, & Chaos) - $1 {Wal-Mart}

And under $10 for the infamous Pop Pop...

1. Bucket of microwaveable popcorn - $1 {Wal-Mart} filled with goodies, of course...

2. Peanuts (printable from LizzieJane Baby) - $ 1.50 {Wal-Mart}

3. Root Beer (with printables from iheartnaptime and Delightfully Noted) - $3.50 {Wal-Mart}

4. Cowtails (Not pictured) - You're the moooost best Pop Pop!

(I don't know why my photo with the numbers won't load up. Grrrrr.)

There are still a few things left to get and some that are unmentioned. I can't divulge all the secrets for the sake of sneaky eyes that might lurk here. Happy father's day shopping!

six on saturday

2013-06-01T20:59:00.002-05:00

1. We've had storms here all week and yes, it's been crrrraaaazy! On the other hand, the corn has taken off...(and so has our garden!)

2. Handsome Husband found two bird eggs today. One in the garden. One along the edge of the pines. I carried this one around for quite a while. What for? I'll never know. And yes, that's a nasty cut I have there, huh? Eeew.

3. We I pulled weeds in 12 rows of strawberries. The man did more talking and playing with bugs, spiders and worms than anything. Miss K came at the end to help with a couple rows.

4. Handsome Husband put temporary caging around our squash, cabbage and lettuce to keep out the bunnies. I opted for all-the-way-around perimeter fencing to keep out the dogs, bunnies, squirrels, what-have-you, but he said no. I still like my idea better.

5. We have potatoes folks. Seven glorious rows. SEVEN.

6. I'm reading this. It's not inspiring, spiritual, or non-fiction. I needed a summer read that wasn't serious. This one's ok. (I picked it up for a quarter at a thrift shop.) It shares stories about many different couples, situations, and how they all come together in a beach house in Nantucket where one lady is threatening to lose said house and so she decides to rent out rooms. The stories are eh...a married man who figures out he's gay; a guy who starts a romance with his boss - whose married; a woman whose husband cheated on her and so she divorces him. See what I mean? Not exactly what I was looking for or thought it'd turn out to be but, we'll see how it ends.

(almost) the best day (ever)

2013-05-25T14:17:00.000-05:00

It's almost the best day ever! Guess what arrived?!!

Cookbooks! Not just any cookbooks. No, The Pioneer Woman cookbooks!

I have to admit, I was surprised to see these gems. Last week, I ordered them and have been checking daily to see when they'd arrive. Sadly, their expected arrival date was May 30th. So I almost hit my head on the ceiling when the post-lady rang the doorbell. I knew exactly what those packages were and I stepped outside and yelled, "Thanks!" as she climbed back in her car. If she would've been standing there, I believe I would've kissed her. Honest.

Oh dear, I thought I might shriek in excitement and pass out. But then, I couldn't look through the new one, which our library didn't seem to have. I could've put a hold on one from another library but, I knew, I had to have these for my own personal collection and I would've renew them for the rest of my life but, they might catch on to that soon or later. Don't ya think?

And sorry, I wasn't about to leave my perch in this warm, comfy bed on this cold rainy, perfect-for-layin'-around day just to find the perfect backdrop for this photo. My apologies.

Remember I told you Miss K and I made PW's Restaurant Style Salsa? Well, it's almost gone. Worse yet, Handsome Husband and I are the only ones eating it. Let's just say that I ate it for breakfast two days in a row and for lunch, and that the roof of my mouth is now completely raw but that hasn't held me back any. I'll also add that Handsome Husband claims the hottest thing he eats is mustard. Mustard y'all! It's sad. But he's eaten this salsa like candy. Like candy, I say! We're in love. With Pioneer Woman.

On a totally unrelated subject, Handsome Husband is out with our neighbor for some manly bonding at Sears. Ya know, where they hang out and drool over tools for hours. He loves that kinda stuff. Well, I get a text with a picture of a grill. OK, can I just say that I've been fighting every cell in my body not to run out and purchase a grill, patio set, burgers, brats and steaks because there's just something about Memorial Day that screams cookout and friends. (Not to mention, we still have a grill and patio set in Virginia that's never made it here. Sounds like time for another yard sale back home.)

I kindly asked him not to entice me with photos of grills because I'm weak and I'll go buy one in a second. Don't tempt me. He replied he was just looking at our options and so I reminded him to keep his options to himself.

OK, enough rambling. I have cookbooks to drool over, dinners to collaborate, and grocery lists to make. Oh the excitement!

Happy Memorial Day weekend!

miscellany

2013-05-21T21:39:00.000-05:00

The man is sound asleep in his bed. Has been since just before six.

He was up late last night with all the storming and

holing up in the bathroom.

It wasn't a fun time.

I sit anxiously awaiting his cries.

He went to bed with a headache. I'm sure from lack of sleep.

Ever since birth, that boy has required a solid amount of zzz's.

The dryer just stopped and I pray that he sleeps on.

He's barely even changed position since he first got in bed.

He hasn't had any dinner and I fear he'll awaken with a hearty appetite

and keep me up all night 'cuz he was born with the curse.

The curse of my crazy metabolism that screams,

"It's time to eat!"

every couple hours.

Poor guy.

On a totally different subject but, still having to do with food...

Miss K and I made P-Dub's Restaurant Style Salsa.

Heavenstobetsy, it's so, so...words escape me it's so dang good!

Then, to extinguish the crazy-good burn,

I helped myself to some banana pudding.

It was only two spoonfuls.

OK, really it was like four.

What can I say?

There is no chance in Hades for a toned beach body.

I'm watching as the sky grows darker and darker.

I keep a constant eye on The Weather Channel and

pray we don't end up sleeping in the bathroom again.

Oh, it is so not fun.

Miss K is at a friend's.

The sports banquet was tonight and I got stuck at home with the man.

Evidently there was a small soiree afterwards and all of her friends were there.

Texting madly, I gave in to the urge to double check the details.

Shoo! Only ten more minutes 'til she's home.

I don't like this weather. At least there's no tornado watch.

Yet.

Only calling for thunderstorms from 1 until 5 a.m.

I hear the low roar of our neighbor's semi pulling out,

headed for Mississippi he'd said earlier.

The wind is quiet tonight.

Thus far.

I put the garbage can, basketball goal and archery target in the garage.

We've battened down the hatches,

prepared for the worst,

hoping for the best,

praying all the while.

By now, everyone is "bedded down" for the night.

The man remains deep in slumber.

No worries. I checked in on him.

He was sweaty and so I peeled off some of his covers

and turned the A/C down some more.

We always sleep better when it's cooler.

Snug as a bug in a rug.

Everyone except Handsome Husband,

who's most certainly dining on steak of some sort.

Oh to be him.

Well, some days.

twenty-two on tuesday

2013-05-21T19:07:00.000-05:00

1. The sun is shining. Praise God.
2. I'm exhausted.
3. We spent time holed-up in our basement bathroom last night due to the storms.
4. Handsome Husband was in Kansas but, he's fine. I'll be happy when he returns.
5. I'll be ecstatic to high-tail it home when June rolls around!
6. I've never seen wind blow like it does here in Illinois.

7. When the wind let up, we ran upstairs and I sent everyone on mission to get things for holing-up...blankets, pillows, flashlights. We're not accustomed to this.
8. As we were scurrying around, ~~dumb-dumb~~ Dais decides to pee on the man's floor.
9. How would I ever hear a tornado coming if the carpet cleaner's going?!
10. My heart mourns for the people of Oklahoma.
11. We're alive. thankyouJesus.
12. I picked up a piece of glass to fix the broken basement window.
13. I'm eagerly awaiting the arrival of two cookbooks that I cannot wait to get my hands on.
14. I need more cookbooks like I need a hole in the head.
15. Only 5 more days of school left. Five.
16. We have 3 graduation parties to attend this weekend.
17. I keep telling myself my child will not be t.h.i.r.t.e.e.n. on her next birthday.

18. Or that we'll be parents of a seventh grader. Or that my baby'll be 7.
19. The man (a.k.a. my baby) made pumpkin pie this weekend. He likes to cook. {smile}

20. In addition, I made not yo mama's banana pudding (for the second time) cuz I'm high maintenance and snobby when it comes to food. I like it rich and buttery. Try it.
21. The only thing that could ~~beat it~~ come close is the cooked "naner puddin" Thelma and I had with coffee as we sat in the suh-weet rustic ~no kids, just mamas~ confines of the Jenny Wiley.
22. Storms'll be back for another round tonight. Sayin' my prayers. Maybe you could say one too?

Miss Dais and Max-a-Poo

2013-05-17T18:41:00.001-05:00

We sure have had a crazy time here this past week. Crazy Daisy's in heat. Mr. Max-a-Poo's driving us batty. Needless to say, it's been a fun couple weeks. (dripping with sarcasm) So, in appreciation of their "better" days, I'll share an excursion in the yard from a couple weeks ago.

Have you ever tried to sneak up on a dog?

Well, it's impossible.

Miss Dais with her perky little ears.

"Is that a shock collar?" We get this question all the time. No, it's a tracking collar. Dais is a Walker coonhound and she likes to run. I mean RUN!

While I was away in Kentucky, Handsome Husband let her out after breakfast one morning and she wouldn't come back before he left for work. So she was stuck outside all day. When he got home, he looked at the GPS and she'd run 22 miles! Twenty. two. miles. I say.

They've ruined our yard digging for ground squirrels. They're checking one of their holes here. Evidently, there was some action that we weren't aware of.

Happy Friday friends!

cuz he said so

2013-05-17T15:56:00.002-05:00

It's been said that women have a sixth sense. There're times when I know better. When my better judgment says, "Uh-uh sister, that ain' gone work." There're times when I follow that voice, and then there're those when I don't. I reel it in, tuck the covers up close around its neck and put it to bed, trying not to think twice about it.

Le'me take a step back. Yesterday, while waiting for Handsome Husband to arrive home from work, the Littles and I played two-square.

Yeah, that game. The one with a big bouncy playground ball and a server.

The man patiently awaited his turn. He sat calmly on the ground beside us playing with sticks and rocks and things. All of a sudden we heard the crash of breaking glass. I look over and see that one of the basement windows is bashed. I look back at him and he has this face. The face that says, "What just happened here?!" He didn't even know what he'd done!

Needless to say, I'm all "What in the world?! What're ya doin' kid?!" I quickly got over myself, we've all broken a window or two. It's a piece of glass, it can be fixed. An easy fix.

So, the night proceeds on as usual. Dinner. A game of h.o.r.s.e, throw the baseball a while. Finally, baths are taken, teeth brushed, prayers are said, and hugs and kisses goodnight. I tell Handsome Husband we must do somethin' with that window. Only problem was, I'm not a fan of basements. If it's a finished, well-lit, cozy kinda basement, well that's fine and dandy. If it's not, count me out! (Ours is the latter.) Needless to say, I wasn't jumping on the bandwagon to head-up that project, simple as it was.

"There'll be varmints and critters comin' through that hole." I say. "No," he replies, "Mice only come in in the winter. It'll be fine." Fine until somebody rolls over and locks eyes with a rabid coon, his mouth drawn back, teeth glarin' and a nasty growl coming from the depths of his angry belly. I could just see us wakin' up to an animal apocalypse...snakes, crickets, mice, coons, feral cats, you name it. But sweeping my sixth sense along with any fear under the rug and crawling safely into bed, I feared not.

Well, it's clinically proven that men don't know everything. It's common knowledge that they'll never - not ever - stop for directions unless we, as women, agree to get out at the gas station and ask ourselves. And then, they still don't want to be seen doing this. They'd never be shamed into stoopin' that low. Yes, men have their flaws.

So, we never cover, stuffed or patched that huge hole in the basement window. Cuz he said so. Long about 2:30 this afternoon, I realize there are two big, black, buzzin' flies in my bedroom. You know the kind, they're huge, they bzzzzzzzzz way more than any normal fly. They're all hyped up on pollen and trained kamikazes. Yep, those kind.

I venture out of the bedroom because the suicide attacks and constant buzzing's really startin' to get to me. I'm beginnin' to lose it. Low and behold, I hear more. I proceed investigating the various rooms of the old farmhouse and I find they're in every room, every stinkin' room! There're no doors, nor windows open, just that silly hole in the basement window.

So, the moral of this story is...don't always trust the words behind those suggestive, strong lips of Handsome Husband. God gave you a sixth sense, use it! Even if you don't want to venture into the dark, cold, scary basement.