(Bold means finished) (*denotes a book on my “Recommended by Friends 2024” list)

1. Carbs and Cadavers by Ellery Adams
2. Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
3. On Tyranny
4. We Will Not Cancel Us by adrienne marie brown
5. Aurora by Kim Stanley Robinson
6. The Women by Kristin Hannah
7. House of Earth & Blood, Part 1 by Sarah J. Maas
8. The Serviceberry by Robin Wall Kimmerer
9. Catch and Kill by Ronan Farrow
10. The Creative Act by Rick Rubin
11. I Won’t Shut Up by Ally Henny
12. Glucose Revolution by Jessie Inchauspe
13. *Parable of the Talents by Octavia Butler
14. *The Giver by Lois Lowry
15. *Insomnia by Stephen King (in process)
16. *Classic Collection of Short Stories by John Steinbeck
17. *Summerland by Michael Chabon
18. *Last Night at the Telegraph Club by Malinda Lo
19. *Believe Me by Eddie Izzard (in process)
20. *Star of Life by Rick Ellyn
21. *The Language of Bodies by Suzanne Dewitt Hall
22. *The Way of Kings by Brandon Sanderson
23. *Born a Crime by Trevor Noah
24. *Under the Whispering Door by TJ Klune
25. *The Hunger Games series by Suzanne Collins
26. *The Only Woman in the Room by Marie Benedict
27. *The Whisperer by Donato Carrisi
28. *The Impending Blindness of Billie Scott by Zoe Thorogood
29. *Transformations by Anne Sexton
30. *Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom
31. Anxious People by Fredrik Backman
32. Eleanor and Hick by Susan Quinn (in process)
33. Come as you are by Emily Nagoski
34. Unexpected Stories by Octavia Butler
35. Attachments by Rainbow Rowell
36. The $100 Startup by Chris Guillebeau
37. Caste by Isabel Wilkerson
38. I will always write back by Caitlin Alifrenka
39. In the Lateness of the World by Carolyn Forche
40. Conflict is not abuse by Sarah Schulman
41. Let’s talk about hard things by Anna Sale
42. The Sacred Enneagram by Christopher L. Heuertz
43. The Crossroads of Should and Must by Elle Luna
44. Making a Living without a job by Barbara J. Winter
45. The Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green
46. Divine Rebels by Caroline Myss and Andrew Harvey
47. All Saints Hotel and Cocktail Lounge by Nathan Monk
48. Russian Sleeper Cell by Nathan Monk
49. Your Children Are Very Greatly in Danger by Justin Murphy
50. Pleasure Activism by adrienne maree brown
51. The Bullet Journal Method by Ryder Carroll
52. Hope by Marc Levy
53. The Code Breaker by Isaac Isaacson
54. Evicted by Matthew Desmond
55. Love Lettering by Kate Clayborn
56. No Walls and the Recurring Dream by Ani DiFranco
57. Building a Story Brand by Donald Miller
58. Money Making Mom by Crystal Paine
59. Bone Music by Christopher Rice
60. The Flux by Ferrett Steinmetz
61. Rain Girl by Gabi Kreslehner
62. Outlander by Diana Gabaldon
63. Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell by Susanna Clarke
64. The 4-Hour Work Week by Timothy Ferriss
65. How to Lead When You’re Not in Charge by Clay Scroggins
66. The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van der Kolk
67. Becoming by Michelle Obama
68. Nonbinary. Memoirs of Gender and Identity
69. Pachinko by Min Jin Lee
70. A Demon in my view by Ruth Rendell
71. Ordinary People by Judith Guest
72. 1776 by David McCullough
73. The Virgin of Prince Street by Sonja Livingston
74. The Mayor of Casterbridge by Thomas Hardy
75. The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
76. A Season in Hell by Rimbaud
77. The Undesired by Yrsa Sigurdardottir
78. Killer Reunion by G.A. McKevett
79. The Day is Dark by Yrsa Sigurdardottir
80. Sami Blood
81. The Heart Keeper by Alex Dahl
82. Alfons Mucha 1860-1939 : master of art nouveau by Renate Ulmer
83. The little old lady who broke all the rules by Catherina Ingelman-Sundberg
84. The Ocean at the End of the Lane by Neil Gaiman
85. More Myself by Alicia Keys
86. Beloved by Toni Morrison
87. American Dirt
88. The Bookwoman of Troublesome Creek by Kim Michele Richardson
89. The Giver of Stars by Jojo Moyes
90. The Tattooist of Auschwitz by Heather Morris
91. The Dutch House by Ann Patchett
92. A Spark of Light by Jodi Picoult
93. How to argue with a racist by Adam Rutherford

(Bold means finished) (*denotes a book on my “Recommended by Friends 2024” list)

1. The Secret, Book & Scone Society by Ellery Adams
2. Easter Basket Murder by Leslie Meier, Barbara Ross & Lee Hollis
3. The Little Lost Library by Ellery Adams
4. Murder on Cape Cod by Maddie Day
5. We came to Welcome You by Vincent Tirado
6. We Solve Murders by Richard Osman
7. The Whispered Word by Ellery Adams
8. Ink & Shadows by Ellery Adams
9. The Vanishing Type by Ellery Adams
10. The Book of Candlelight by Ellery Adams
11. The Silver Metal Lover by Tanith Lee
12. A Blade So Black by L.L. McKinney
13. Songs of No Providence by Lydi Conklin
14. Turning to Birds by Lili Taylor
15. Memorial Days by Geraldine Brooks
16. How to lose your mother by Molly Jong-Fast
17. We Will Not Cancel Us by adrienne marie brown
18. Aurora by Kim Stanley Robinson
19. The Women by Kristin Hannah
20. House of Earth & Blood, Part 1 by Sarah J. Maas
21. The Serviceberry by Robin Wall Kimmerer
22. Catch and Kill by Ronan Farrow
23. The Creative Act by Rick Rubin
24. I Won’t Shut Up by Ally Henny
25. Glucose Revolution by Jessie Inchauspe
26. *Parable of the Talents by Octavia Butler
27. *The Giver by Lois Lowry
28. *Insomnia by Stephen King (in process)
29. *Classic Collection of Short Stories by John Steinbeck
30. *Summerland by Michael Chabon
31. *Last Night at the Telegraph Club by Malinda Lo
32. *Believe Me by Eddie Izzard (in process)
33. *Star of Life by Rick Ellyn
34. *The Language of Bodies by Suzanne Dewitt Hall
35. *The Way of Kings by Brandon Sanderson
36. *Born a Crime by Trevor Noah
37. *Under the Whispering Door by TJ Klune
38. *The Hunger Games series by Suzanne Collins
39. *The Only Woman in the Room by Marie Benedict
40. *The Whisperer by Donato Carrisi
41. *The Impending Blindness of Billie Scott by Zoe Thorogood
42. *Transformations by Anne Sexton
43. *Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom
44. Anxious People by Fredrik Backman
45. Eleanor and Hick by Susan Quinn (in process)
46. Come as you are by Emily Nagoski
47. Unexpected Stories by Octavia Butler
48. Attachments by Rainbow Rowell
49. The $100 Startup by Chris Guillebeau
50. Caste by Isabel Wilkerson
51. I will always write back by Caitlin Alifrenka
52. In the Lateness of the World by Carolyn Forche
53. Conflict is not abuse by Sarah Schulman
54. Let’s talk about hard things by Anna Sale
55. The Sacred Enneagram by Christopher L. Heuertz
56. The Crossroads of Should and Must by Elle Luna
57. Making a Living without a job by Barbara J. Winter
58. The Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green
59. Divine Rebels by Caroline Myss and Andrew Harvey
60. All Saints Hotel and Cocktail Lounge by Nathan Monk
61. Russian Sleeper Cell by Nathan Monk
62. Your Children Are Very Greatly in Danger by Justin Murphy
63. Pleasure Activism by adrienne maree brown
64. The Bullet Journal Method by Ryder Carroll
65. Hope by Marc Levy
66. The Code Breaker by Isaac Isaacson
67. Evicted by Matthew Desmond
68. Love Lettering by Kate Clayborn
69. No Walls and the Recurring Dream by Ani DiFranco
70. Building a Story Brand by Donald Miller
71. Money Making Mom by Crystal Paine
72. Bone Music by Christopher Rice
73. The Flux by Ferrett Steinmetz
74. Rain Girl by Gabi Kreslehner
75. Outlander by Diana Gabaldon
76. Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell by Susanna Clarke
77. The 4-Hour Work Week by Timothy Ferriss
78. How to Lead When You’re Not in Charge by Clay Scroggins
79. The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van der Kolk
80. Becoming by Michelle Obama
81. Nonbinary. Memoirs of Gender and Identity
82. Pachinko by Min Jin Lee
83. A Demon in my view by Ruth Rendell
84. Ordinary People by Judith Guest
85. 1776 by David McCullough
86. The Virgin of Prince Street by Sonja Livingston
87. The Mayor of Casterbridge by Thomas Hardy
88. The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
89. A Season in Hell by Rimbaud
90. The Undesired by Yrsa Sigurdardottir
91. Killer Reunion by G.A. McKevett
92. The Day is Dark by Yrsa Sigurdardottir
93. Sami Blood
94. The Heart Keeper by Alex Dahl
95. Alfons Mucha 1860-1939 : master of art nouveau by Renate Ulmer
96. The little old lady who broke all the rules by Catherina Ingelman-Sundberg
97. The Ocean at the End of the Lane by Neil Gaiman
98. More Myself by Alicia Keys
99. Beloved by Toni Morrison
100. American Dirt
101. The Bookwoman of Troublesome Creek by Kim Michele Richardson
102. The Giver of Stars by Jojo Moyes
103. The Tattooist of Auschwitz by Heather Morris
104. The Dutch House by Ann Patchett
105. A Spark of Light by Jodi Picoult
106. How to argue with a racist by Adam Rutherford

This month’s theme is more of a prayer and a hope for the world. Please show mercy to each other. Please heal hearts and change minds. Please illuminate the truth of each of our belonging. Please send miracles.

Every new day in the U.S. brings a new horror. “Now what?” is an often asked question from me. As a transgender human, I am scared. Yes, I live in a blue state, and one that adopted language that is inclusive to trans people. This is about more than just me, myself and I. People from all over the world came to the U.S. for refuge for a wide variety of reasons, including being trans. Now where do they go? People were still waiting to come here from Afghanistan.

It’s a tender time.

The Ides of March saw the downfall of Julius Caesar. It’s around the same time we mark the arrival of St. Patrick in Ireland. I don’t know what March will hold, but my greatest desire is mercy and hope for better things. Personally, St. Patrick’s Day is a day of beautiful music and community for me.

I will get out my fiddle and play my heart out.

May March bring each of us a bit o’ luck, a bit o’ fortune, and a bit o’ peace.

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Forgive me, friends. I’ve had this finished since February 1st, and my heart has been distracted by the- gestures left and right – insanity in my home country of the States of “Unitedness,” the horrific death of Sam Nordquist about 30 minutes drive from where I live, unrest around the whole world, and that’s not even counting on the every day and every lifetime details we all go through any minute of any day. Plane crashes almost every day. This is not normal. This should not become normal for any of us. The wildfires. The list goes on and on…

I wanted something fun and floral for the shortest month in days, and the longest-feeling month in emotional decades. In 2015, I made the mistake of going to Los Angeles for a week early in February, and it was BRUTAL to go back to the cloudy bright gray of Rochester that continues until April… (Next time I will at least wait until the end of the month or maybe March.)

A local museum has a tulip, daffodil, hyacinth crocus display every February. We’ve gone the past few years and it REALLY lifted up my spirits. I missed it this year. I didn’t even have the energy to dream about it. And also, my car was literally stuck in ice. We haven’t gone anywhere in days and days. Good news – it is now mid 40s and the car is free!

So, what now? I’m looking forward to March. We march forward whether we want to or not. I’m looking for mercy in March. Mercy for all of our lives.

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Junk drawers are usually full. Full of important office-type equipment – pens, pencils, paperclips, various kinds of tape, erasers, markers, and odds and ends that don’t otherwise have homes. They are the DOOM BOX of cabinetry. You have to clean them out now and again, in order to find items you thought you’d lost, realize there is no optimal way of organizing this weird claptrap collection of bits and bobs, and to re-lose items until the next cleaning.

I feel like 2024 has been the junk drawer of years in a lot of ways. It is time for a good clean-out to start the year fresh. So many things feel up in the air, and topsy turvy. There is no good way of making things feel right again, probably not for some time. But, we might find some valuable gems in the process.

Hold on to those precious valuables that you find along the way. Cherish the friends who help you laugh during the hard times. Eat dessert first and savor each bite. Stop and smell the roses. Listen to the ear worm that is stuck in your head.

As we collectively look back at 2024 and the pandemic years that came before, let us dance into 2025 with a good pen and a blank sheet of paper to create something new.

Happy New Year!

Should old acquaintance be forgot
And never brought to mind?
Should old acquaintance be forgot
In the days of auld lang syne?

For auld lang syne, my dear
For auld lang syne
We’ll drink a cup of kindness yet
For the sake of auld lang syne

Cheers to you, Uncle Eric! You are missed so much and will never be forgotten.

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This is the 4th issue of our first volume of newsletters. I’m not sure what to say about it, except it is a labor of love, and really fun to create these with Jenn. I will also share the 3 previous issues below.

I hope you might take a look at these to learn more about what people with Autism, AHDH, and both AuDHD experience. There are things that are very similar, and there are things that go in diametrically opposite directions, making executive functioning very difficult. I have learned so much about myself throughout this process. I feel like I still know very little, even though I’ve been learning about it all for quite a long time.

Jenn is an amazing person, and very dedicated to giving other parents the support she needed as a mom with a child on the spectrum. She has since learned that she is also on the spectrum with ADHD herself. I’m going to share resources here, as I work my way through organizing everything.

If you have a question you want me to answer, send it to: dearcoriander at gmail dot com. If I don’t know the answer, I will find someone who can help!

Do you have a suggestion for someone as Creator of the Month? Please join and leave a comment at the FB group Autism/AuDHD/ADHD Virtually.

December 2024
November 2024
October 2024
September 2024

I am in full Christmasy mode. I’ve been watching a holiday movie every day since November 1st and keeping a list here at Letterboxd. The uplifting messages have helped raise my general mood from the depression of November’s US political results

I also made a phone version!

I have been in a whirlwind of grief – from the death of my uncle, and from the US state of political affairs. As a transmasculine person, I am concerned for women’s rights, LGBTQ+ rights, immigrant rights, racial justice, and disability rights. We’ve been here before though, and will probably continue to fight for a long time. I am here and queer and I won’t be silent.

So, on one hand, I am consumed with angst and worry. On the other hand, I know the best revenge is to keep living a good life. I choose JOY. With the BIG letters.

What do you hope Santa brings to you?

I am content to have a quiet day with my mom, aunt and dog.

Maybe a new pair of Doc Martens.

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I am feeling very comfortable in my own skin, and grateful for my family and friends. I had the great fortune to unintentionally spend Halloween with my BFF and his dogs. I meant to visit earlier in the day, but ended up seeing all of his trick or treaters, which was a definite treat for me! I also got dog hugs from his fur kids.

I also have a secret that I’ve been unintentionally keeping. My friend Jenn and I have been working on a newsletter for the Autism/AuDHD/ADHD group she founded. It was kind of a whirlwind project, but it is so much fun. It has really changed my life for the good. A big THANK YOU to JENN for roping me into this, dragging me last month when I was really sick and out of it, and giving me this chance.

I learned when I was 38 (ten years ago!) that I have ADHD and started taking medication. It changed my life to be medicated for it. It didn’t solve any problem, but I actually started finishing things I started.

Even before this, in my early 30s, I learned that I was very likely on the autism spectrum. (At that time, I was investigating Aspergers, which is now classified under the autism umbrella. It took a while to find help for this weird collection of random stuff (which now because of the pandemic and TikTok we know are VERY RELATABLE for LOTS of folks). During the pandemic, Jenn started this FaceBook group called Autism Virtually (now called Autism/AuDHD/ADHD Virtually) after the movie Love Actually. She has gathered a whole team of people (friends, colleagues, community members, people from all over the world, parents, etc) and it is so exciting.

I will share the newsletters and links here at a later time, if anyone wants to join.

For now, I will close by sharing again how much gratitude I have for everything in my life.

What are you grateful for?

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I owe you a huge apology. I made this (and Novembers) and was so happy and proud of it, but never uploaded it here. I shared it on other social media.

My uncle passed away at the end of September, and it really hit me hard. I’m just now getting back to routines, and creating new ones. My mom is a twin, and this was my mom’s twin’s husband. There’s a special relationship that twins have, and I think that extends to their children as well. Since my dad died in 2013, I’ve relied on my uncle for help on household advice. He was a really funny man, and introduced me to all kinds of awesome Scottish stuff.

How was your October?

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After Halloween, I’m ready for Christmas. I’m going to document the movies I watch this season.

Add me on Letterboxd, and find this list on there too!

1. My Sweet Austrian Holiday
2. ‘Tis the Season for Love
3. Christmas with the Kranks