ink + chai

on canvas

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Thu, 16 May 2013 08:03:00 +0000

Uranus Square Sun
mixed media on canvas, 24 x 18"

process here

"... something within you won’t allow you inner peace, or the ability to be reflective long enough to build a permanent foundation. However, all this apparent disruption can be turned to real purpose and, as much as you chop and change, you do actually have a correspondingly proportionate power for creativity."
astrotext

(I don't have this aspect btw.)

p.s, I realised I had used an old photo on my previous post, so changed it to another piece I'm currently working on.

body moves

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Mon, 13 May 2013 06:37:00 +0000

It can be so easy to fall into an exercise trend - plenty of DVDs, books, classes, blogs, and retreats. Yet there are countless practices to bring us into embodiment.

And everything can be made sacred.
And everyone has different needs.

Imagine a body-orientated movement that was 100% me?

If there's guilt, obligation, restriction, anxiety, boredom, duress, do I keep pushing? I read tricks on how to get myself up and moving "even if you don't feel like it".

Imagine feeling like it.

felt art, work in progress

A whole-body movement that stirred a primitive stone deep within my soul. A movement that, after basic proficiency, had zero concept of improvement. A movement that burst me open energetically, released deepest emotions in a liberating way, took my brain into Flow, moved me to tears of joy or laughter, or small sighs like coming Home.

.... dancing, hiking, bike riding.

En-joy-ment.

And what else could we consider? Drumming, fencing, trampolining, roller blading, belly-dancing, horse-riding, kayaking, abseiling, hula hooping, Frisbee, physically active volunteering....

After 10+ years of 'giving it a go', I'm hanging up my yoga mat. And there, look, I made a space to let in authentic goodness.

sensing : may 10

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Fri, 10 May 2013 06:29:00 +0000

sketchbook

•

see: the raven ..... 6/10, well, it looked good
taste: raspberry + echinacea tea
touch: sand between toes ..... first beach visit of the year
smell: ink + pastels
hear: rain ..... it's returned so soon
read: cakes and ale, maugham ..... 1/3 way
think: of a woman + stories + taking a chance = ink blot kingdoms
feel: enthused

senses shared

May your weekend include finding hidden gems.

values

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Thu, 09 May 2013 06:36:00 +0000

acrylic on canvas, 20 x 18"
in progress

•

It takes experience to understand which choices, lifestyles, or things, we value, and sometimes it takes crisis to make us truly appreciate them.

It's too easy to fall back on simple comforts - food, shopping, books, TV, leaning on a significant other, the tried-and-tested formula..... and taking these comforts away is not the answer. It's peeking underneath and digging up what would really bring us nourishment.

I can keep doing 'it' the way I've always done it, and 'get by', or I can take a chance, and find solid ground supported by fertile depths.

And the chance is this - ~~believing~~ deciding I'm worth the effort.

exploration

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Tue, 07 May 2013 06:40:00 +0000

wip

Twice I wrote this post. I find it impossible to get across the depth of my break-through. It was one of those no-brainer ideas for so many of you creatives, but psychological warfare for the mad amongst us.

I'm going to sum it up by saying - crisis happened, healing happened. I've taken my creative inner life to the next stage.

•

A few of you commented last week on what my explorations might produce, anticipating what might come. But I need to share with you that all this recent work has been 100% about the process, the experiments, the discoveries, the questions. Results were the anti-thesis of what I was undertaking.

I believe it's essential to the creative person to simply make marks, throw paint, puncture cloth, join words. And important to share these nothings-and-everythings with each other.

I can't imagine a world without blogs-as-galleries, but I would prefer one that included blogs-as-open-workshops. I read enough comments on other blogs to know that we're well versed in congratulatory language - the 'I love its'. I do hope we're becoming more comfortable in the 'I hear/see yous'.

day three

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Fri, 03 May 2013 13:01:00 +0000

in progress

“You use a glass mirror to see your face;
you use works of art to see your soul.”

George Bernard Shaw, Back to Methuselah

The First Choice 20 x 20
acrylic and charcoal on paper

Happy weekend friends, may it include a secret indulgence.

day two

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Thu, 02 May 2013 06:27:00 +0000

paper half my height

“There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and will be lost.”

Martha Graham

day one

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Tue, 30 Apr 2013 18:52:00 +0000

expressive drawing
paper half my height

“Art enables us to find ourselves
and
lose ourselves at the same time.”

Thomas Merton

charcoal - paint

retreat

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 09:12:00 +0000

I'm on a mini artist's (home) retreat right now.

I'm outpouring.

Look forward to sharing it with you soon.

sensing : apr 26

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Fri, 26 Apr 2013 09:42:00 +0000

cloth art in progress

•

see: the last quartet ..... character-driven, 6/10
taste: chantilly cream covered chocolate cake ..... yep, i made
touch: chalk on concrete ..... fun
smell: woman's perfume when i sit and drink my morning tea ...... residual energy?
hear: children's laughter ..... sun finally our - playground time
read: learning how to learn ..... dipping in occasionally
think: of sunshine-related activities..... forecasted for this weekend
feel: slight nausea ..... eek, that milk did smell iffy

senses shared

May your weekend on this Full Moon include finding a compromise between security and the desire for profound experience. Acknowledge your deep soul-needs without turning your back on the stable aspects of your life.

pause {vi}

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 06:53:00 +0000

“The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being
overwhelmed by the tribe.
If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened.
But no price is too high to pay
for the privilege of owning yourself.”

Friedrich Nietzsche

comment freedom

seams/seems

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Mon, 22 Apr 2013 06:28:00 +0000

They'll See What They Want To See
11 x 18"
repurposed denim + denim thread

Once upon a time,
for a very, very long time,
I allowed myself to be
no bigger
than his idea of me.

Clothed myself tight
in what they needed
to see
from me.

quiet suffocations
dropping scars.

There is always a thin spot
a pulled thread of light,
to remember oneself.

I tear open the seams.
Deceptively easy.
and breathe
fully
again.

could be

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Wed, 17 Apr 2013 06:56:00 +0000

“Maybe the greatest madness is to see life as it is
rather than what it could be.”

Don Quixote, Cervantes

Miss 4 became Miss 5 today. I introduced her to one of my all time favourite stories, Don Quixote, and she already loves it like her mama has. She learns (through story and, hopefully, through mama's living); be fearless, work with what you have, imagination is joy, wear your armour loosely, dare to seem crazy for the sake of following your dreams.

fired up

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Mon, 15 Apr 2013 06:32:00 +0000

The thing about checking with the energy of our solar system, is gaining the reassurance that it is normal and it will pass - cycles and flux and all that.

I'm way out of the cloud-floating Pisces energy, and the new fire energy certainly lit one under my derrière. I've finished my very personal textile art piece, tied off a couple of others, framed up a few, started two more, drafted several astro articles. What a difference!

What about you?

•

Thanks for the creative input on the last post.
Never be afraid to offer an artist your thoughts, when asked for, because creative dialogue isn't about taking up someone's idea, it's about triggering inspiration.

creative input

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Tue, 09 Apr 2013 09:18:00 +0000

currently untitled
hand felt and hemp stitch
7 x 7.5"

I've been looking at this piece on and off for over a month. It stopped speaking to me, but I feel that something is missing.

Do you see it? A circle, a line, a form? Tell me.

I'm trying to trick it into re-opening the dialogue with me by framing it up. A different perspective. Caging it might make it panic and start talkin'. Tough measures.

Or we may both settle into completion 'as is'.

What do you do to/with your work, when it stops communicating?

through

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Thu, 04 Apr 2013 11:02:00 +0000

Horizons beckon me and I'm a self-confessed Creative Meanderer, yet I've come to respect limitations. I understand that for a person who yearns for freedom, the infinite can become overwhelming. It's being dropped in the middle of the ocean. It's a labyrinthine old building.

Going everywhere and nowhere.

Without boundaries, I either choose to stop and am engulfed in frustration at all that is left to explore, or, I collapse.

Time limits on my studies and creativity bring out the best in me. At the very least, my focus is channelled.

Sure I still want to run free.
Every day.
It's my basic nature.

Without boundaries though, it's impossible to know if a step has taken me forward or otherwise.

The trick has been threefold; to not run but go ahead and walk through these doors, to recognise that it's my choice to do so, and, to appreciate that even a single step takes me closer to my wild dreams.

p.s, my latest article, for all Aries or Libran ascendants/descendants.

expectations

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Mon, 25 Mar 2013 16:26:00 +0000

Remember that little opening I left for possibility?

There is excitement isn't there? Behind the hope sparked by expectation. But the danger is that expectation also narrows our outlook and we discount other possibilities.

As a bohemian and general-alternative-living-sort-of-person, I had a reasonable expectation that a town renowned for it's bohemian-hippie-green mindset would be my Home. I felt disconnected, I found many people stand-offish, or inexplicably defensive. The charity shops (thrift stores) stretching my budget! And facilities requiring long drives.

Here, due to circumstances/fate, I find myself in a very conservative town. Yet, the people are warm and welcoming. Everything we want is in walking distance or a short drive away. There's a strong community spirit.

I can only be thankful that I recognise blinkers, and know not to wear them. Manifesting can be a blinker.

p.s, we've entered Aries Sun, time to kick myself back into motivation.... what can i say? the grey skies entice my introspection

no apologies

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 10:27:00 +0000

she sent it to me.... how special i felt

•

“The best day of your life is the one on which you decide your life is your own.
No apologies or excuses.
...
This is the day your life really begins.”

Bob Moawad

•

"...always apologize when you’ve done something wrong
but don’t you ever apologize for the way your eyes refuse to stop shining."

Sarah Kay

•

Still floating.... not called back online yet... but wanted to touch base with my friends.

diary

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Mon, 04 Mar 2013 11:07:00 +0000

For a person who finds such bliss in writing and the written word, as well as in journals, notepads, pens, and stationery products in general... it seems a great anomalie to have never been a loyal diarist.

I had a small, lockable, diary in my early teens which I was fairly diligent about, but otherwise, I have countless false starts. I now know that I'm a typewriter style of writer.

Then I came across the 'one line a day' concept. I've ended up with a few lines a day diary, but the tight restriction remains. Not many aesthetic options out there - surprisingly.

It's become my new right-before-bed ritual. A single word for the day is all I'm asking of myself. A sentence or two if I'm so inclined.

Now this I can do.

5 year diary, design by Tamara Shopsin

•

Yep, we're all moved into the new rental place. Mostly unpacked. No real hitches other than the gifted fridge didn't work. Now awaiting furniture for some serious organisation (after yeeears of searching for thrifted furniture that I truly liked and was affordable and not finding it, I cracked and went ikea - ah well, sustainable wood at least). The energy, the proximity to Dartmoor, the light through enormous windows... all so very good.

Fill me in friends, of your past week.

sensing : feb 22

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Fri, 22 Feb 2013 08:10:00 +0000

home : contemplative stitch

•

see: downton abbey ..... finally
taste: curried broccoli + rice ..... with the finicky daughter!
touch: playground hammock + my girl's hands ..... so rare, so blissful
smell: first spring
hear: whatsapp 'ting' ..... after weeks off, working again
read: finished just kids ..... better if read 20 years ago
think: of fabric dyeing options..... befuddled
feel: raring to go! ..... packing this weekend, moving on Tues/Wed

senses shared

May your weekend include a place for you to shine.

flux

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Thu, 21 Feb 2013 08:37:00 +0000

Confusion, uncertainty, frustration... these are wonderful states to be in. Though it doesn't feel so at the time. They are states of flux, and it's only inside a whirlpool that we can be shaken enough to loosen what holds us back.

It's change, and therefore growth in action.

I have faith that the spinning does stop, and I have courage to accept different directions.

•

sketch journal

translating the sketch

seeing other things

listening to the cloth

pause {v}

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 07:47:00 +0000

"No need to hurry. No need to sparkle.
No need to be anybody but oneself."

Virginia Woolf

comment freedom

passion

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Mon, 18 Feb 2013 08:24:00 +0000

I spent a lifetime thinking in terms of passion. I've shifted my thinking.

Although many e-courses and books will ask us to find our passions, push us to dig them up, pin them down, and live them daily...here's what I believe...

Passion is not for everyone.

Passion isn't sustainable.

For many people, happiness or contentment is found on an even plane of daily choices. Without dizzying highs or cavernous lows. If you find nothing within yourself to tag as Passion, you can be left feeling a failure, lost, less, desperate, and despairing.

For the passionate amongst us....

passion is a state of arousal.

Like any similar state, it's one that
a) cannot be sustained without great risk,
and
b) can be confused with anxiety (insidious and difficult to detect).

Anxiety mistaken for passion feeds not a soul-yearning at all, but rather a thirsty dessert of fear - of not getting it right, of not choosing the right focus, of not being original enough, of not enough time, of missing out, of work not being good enough, of not doing enough..... never enough.

As with lovers, while passion may drive them to each others' arms, it isn't passion that sustains a solid and lasting relationship. Passion is a throbbing thud, in the groin, the solar plexus, the heart, and the ears. It is fickle and a terrible listener. Passion drives you into the wrong arms as often as into the right ones.

Forget,
~~Find your passion.~~

Instead,
for the passionate,
Do what you must do.

for the less passionate,
Do what comes naturally.

When I do what I must do (whether stitching, writing, being of service), when I give myself the gift of space to do it, when I release excitement and shoulds and results and comparisons, and instead hug close simplicity and quiet and the just doing of it - that is, the purity of nothing other than Me + The Work...

I'm able to hear the powerful voice of my inner stirrings and yet feel a softness in my gut.

And I know afterwards, that this, this is true love.

sensing : feb 15

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Fri, 15 Feb 2013 07:33:00 +0000

•

see: period mini-series, the grand ..... good stuff!
taste: popcorn
touch: looking into scaravelli ..... the best yoga for me?
smell: rain-soaked soil ..... volunteer gardening
hear: keys turning in locks ..... next place getting fixed up, we move in less than a fortnight
read: Catherine's return to columbia request
think: of love ..... give yourself love. Lisa has an amazing course for you.
feel: content ..... first module of astrology course completed

senses shared

This weekend, may you snuggle into a warming conversation.

pause {iv}

noreply@blogger.com (Monica B) — Wed, 13 Feb 2013 08:01:00 +0000

hemp thread stitching on hand-felted piece
detail, in progress

"When you find yourself in a new situation,
everything that requires healing is going to rush to the surface."

"And if you don't take a minute (to breathe, to gather yourself, to pray),
you will do
what you've always done."

Iyanla Vanzant