Tonight I’m holding my first Speaking Circle in several months. Being able to really be present to ourselves is, to me, one of the greatest blessings of a Speaking Circle. When people ask me why I get so excited when I speak of Circles, this is why…the opportunity to explore and be supported and nourished by the group and what we discover. This is the richness. This is what I want to have more of.

Life Lab

So, waking up seems to mean that you accept that there’s a lot of experimenting and trying things out. This is your Life Lab. What works here? What is it you DO want? Eeeew! That’s not what you were expecting! What’s next? And realizing nothing is WRONG, it really is just not the outcome you’d hoped for. So, what IS next?

What’s Next?

Just received my copy of Style Statement by Carrie McCarthy and Danielle LaPorte. I am excited about delving into this book, probably because when I first heard Carrie McCarthy speak about people being “thirsty for knowing themselves” I thought, here’s a woman after my own heart. The book seems to offer some great questions for self-discovery, and I’m jazzed about the process! McCarthy & LaPorte write,

“We rarely think twice about what we’re attracted to. But what floats our boat - and why - is the zillion-dollar question.”

Inquiry

What do you love - and why?

I’m going to hazard a guess. If your life lacks passion and juice, it’s probably because you’re playing it safe, living in your comfort zone, even if it’s not pleasant. Remember that old saying, better the devil you know than the devil you don’t? We go around thinking, oh, this isn’t great, but “out there” could be worse! So, if you really do want to enjoy your life more, you’re likely going to have to get out of what you perceive as your comfy little world. You have to ask yourself: How comfortable is my comfort zone, really? It may feel safe at one level, but, if you go a little deeper or look from a broader perspective, is your comfort zone really healthfully comfortable? Comfort is great for shoes and waistbands, not so much for the evolution and growth of the soul.

So, we have a choice to stay “safe” or to venture out from our comfort zone. If we choose to venture out, we’re bound to meet resistance early on. In her book, Fearless Living, Rhonda Britten wrote, “Fear is the gatekeeper of your comfort zone.” Fear is going to try to talk you out of leaving your nice, cozy little box, reminding you of all the dangers you’ll face: the missteps, the disapproval, the uncertainty, the discomfort, etc. And some of those may actually happen. We just have to go back to what we want more - perceived comfort or living with more passion.

Do you say “yes” to more passion, more joy in your life? Is there a little part of you wanting to rock the boat a bit? To make some waves? To take a stand for yourself?

Where do you want to start? Where do you feel like the comfort zone just isn’t working any more? Let’s go out and rouse our own rabble! We deserve it!

Okay, so I know I’m not alone, but there are those days when I wonder if I’m off course with the work I do…that I long to share. You know, the “well, given the economy, isn’t what you do a luxury?” In my heart, my soul, it’s “No! This is some of the most important work imaginable!” Knowing yourself, being authentic, finding your own sense of joy, genius, sparkle…THAT’S what this precious life is all about! I’ve been dabbling in this revolution for several years now, so the revolution’s started, it just has to gain momentum!

I’ve just purchased the “Style Statement” book & looking forward to reading it!

Inquiry

Two of the questions asked by Carrie and Danielle were:
What do you love?
Why do you love it?

Is your inner light shining brightly or barely shining?

How do you keep your inner light shining when things start looking dreary?

I found I wasn’t the only one with issues about the company:

GooseinEngland wrote: “The location is initially very difficult to find. I spent two hours lugging my stuff around the area and asking many locals who had no idea how to find it. The main issue is that it’s in a courtyard area and the street address doesn’t correspond to the building location.
… There wasn’t enough hot water even for one shower. They do have a hot water booster on the heater tank, but it requires waiting an hour from the time you request more water. Also, the heater is on a timer, so forget taking a shower when coming in from Temple Bar unless you feel like waiting an hour….

The front desk is also somewhat incompetant. You’re doled out one roll of toilet paper at a time, and you have to constantly ask them for it. Additionally, you have to ask for hair dryers (which are French). The front desk staffer actually told me to to put a key in the extra space where a prong should be (eeek!!)”

Some good lessons learned, but in the meantime, Boo! Hiss! to staydublin!

On my first day here, I finished Jerry & Esther Hicks’ book, Ask and it is Given. I’ve been able to use the processes from the book several times each day. The basic premise of the processes I’ve used is that when you are feeling something that doesn’t feel good, you can “reach” for something that feels better. What’s great is that no matter where we are, we can reach for a thought, belief, or circumstance that feels better, and of course, one that we believe. I keep finding myself in frustrated and/or irritated mode. And in each moment, I can remember how grateful I am to be in Ireland with my husband. How grateful I am that I have a body that works as well as it does. How grateful I am that four and five generations ago my ancestors chose to leave Ireland for San Francisco! As beautiful as Ireland is, as wonderful as the people are, I’ve become so accustomed to wide roads, amenities I take for granted, etc. When all the things I’m grateful for come flooding in, it lifts me from being irritated. Amazing. Not that I’m not back there the next time my father in law does something that irks me, but it certainly is giving me more time to appreciate what is great in my life.

Laurel Thatcher Ulrich wrote those (or very similar) words in an article, Vertuous Women Found: New England Ministerial Literature, 1668-1735 . American Quarterly, Vol. 28, No. 1 (Spring, 1976), pp. 20-40
doi:10.2307/2712475

“Cotton Mather called them the “the hidden ones.” They never preached or sat in a deacon’s bench. Nor did they vote or attend Harvard. Neither, because they were virtuous women, did they question God or the magistrates. They prayed secretly, read the Bible through at least once a year, and went to hear the minister preach even when it snowed. Hoping for an eternal crown, they never asked to be remembered on earth. And they haven’t been. Well-behaved women seldom make history…”

I smile whenever I read those last words. Makes me feel like being sassy is okay. Or if not sassy, at least being able to stand up for what we believe. Although today being a virtuous woman is pretty much taking a stand against the “norm.” Living a life in hopes of that “eternal crown” may seem very out of tune with our culture.

March is Women’s History Month. What’s the history you’d like to make? Do you write it down? One of the reviewers of Ms. Ulrich’s recent book, “Well-Behaved Women Rarely Make History” wrote that “history isn’t simply what happened in the past; it is what later generations choose to remember.” We can help future generations remember by telling our stories.

Enthusiasm is the yeast that makes your hopes shine to the stars. Enthusiasm is the sparkle in your eyes, the swing in your gait. The grip of your hand, the irresistible surge of will and energy to execute your ideas.
- Henry Ford

Have you ever found something you were really passionate about…a thought or idea that you knew was “yours” to build on, even though it might seem unlikely to others? I’ve come, grudgingly, to realize the idea of inner sparkle is “mine.” Being a fairly serious sort much of the time, this sparkle idea often seems unlikely to me, let alone others to whom this gift hasn’t been given. For months, I’ve really tried to put it aside, pretend it isn’t there, get on to more serious subjects…important subjects. Railing at God that He must have something more important for me to be working on than (aack!) sparkle. Yet the railing does little good, and for my own sanity, I work to investigate my negative thoughts and obstacles to seeing sparkle as something not only valid, but valuable to many people, perhaps even key to living a more joyous and productive life. Couldn’t that thought be just as true?

One of the hiccups is that the word sparkle has the connotation of “bling” but that’s not the kind of sparkle I’m talking about. I’m talking enthusiasm and joy, awe and wonder,204545936_fa331c0bb0_m.jpg appreciation and gratitude for this amazing life.  Letting ourselves fill with those qualities. Fill to overflowing, so that they overflow and send sparkle on to the next person. I smile when I think of those people I’ve seen who are our natural sparklers. People can’t help but lightening up around those kinds of folks. Maybe it’s that they strike something within us that has been covered over and now gets a chance to shine. I think it’s time that more sparkle does happen. More light, more inner peace, more joy, more hope. With this inner sparkle, this enthusiasm, our hopes and dreams may shine to the stars. Do I want to live like that? Do I find that valuable? Do I want to be filled with awe and wonder and enthusiasm? Uhhhhh, yeah.

What would your life be like with more inner sparkle, more enthusiasm? What would you be up to? What makes your heart smile? Where and how can you find more of that?

photo: http://farm1.static.flickr.com/60/204545936_fa331c0bb0_m.jpg