Insatiable Hee

Let's not repeat the mistakes of men

2011-11-22T15:54:00.001+01:00

I had a rather interesting experience last weekend. So, I was out with a few friends to a pub with a dance floor (in a town in England). I was thinking to myself, “well, my husband is actually one of the cutest boys in the crowd”, and felt quite smug about it all. Hm hm ..

Less than an hour of thinking that, after a brief moment of keeping him out of my sight, I hear back from a friend of the horrible attack that was brought upon my man.

“Do you know what happened…. X got slapped in his ass my some girl”

What? Ofcourse I was a bit shocked and instinctively my alter ego sprouted out which sways her finger and hips while saying

“Bitch! You ain’t gonna mess with m~~~y man, or you gonna find yo self some reaaaaal trouble!!”

Of course it would’ve been amusing to go find the girl in question and try out my miss thang and all that impression, I thought despite my urge to use this as an social experiment, a opportunity to do social research.

I was first shocked to find out, that “girl”, was in no way a girl, but a woman well in her mid/late thirties- with glasses and looks rather decent. I approached her…

Me: “Excuse me, did you happen to slap a person’s ass tonight?”
Ass slapper: “No… what do ya mean?”
Me: “Well, I was told that you did in fact slap someone’s ass tonight… and was wondering why you did it?”
Ass slapper: “What? I don’t remember… and I mean like guys do it all the time! So what?”
Me: “Do you think its okay, since guys slap your ass? Do you appreciate it if guys slap your ass? Was this your way of spreading the goodness of ass slapping?”
Ass slapper: “what… no… I mean, I guess it is embarrassing…?... I don’t X*”&”£ing care, I had loads of sambucca and don’t remember any ways!!”
Me: “Do you think its okay because you are drunk?”
Ass slapper: “Yeah, I mean like, whatever I had my sambucca and I don’t care what I do…”
Me: “Do you think its okay to use drunkenness and alcohol use as an excuse?”
Ass slapper: “What?? I don’t know, I ain’t talking to you no mo!”
(of course this is the shorter version of the whole conversation)

Of course many people found this story quite amusing and really made the highlight of the night. The girl didn’t seem too embarrassed since she did not try to hide herself in any way nor showed any signs of remorse.

The interesting question is how we can see this happening. Actually many women do slap guys assess (or even grab their balls) in clubs and bars in the UK. I have to admit, this kind of behaviour is observed in the UK scene but I’ve never witnessed or heard of anything similar happening in other countries. I am not too sure about her argument that guys do it all the time.

What would’ve happened if it were the other way around – if a guy went up to her and slapped her ass. Of course it could be that she would’ve enjoyed it, but if it were for me, I would’ve been very disturbed and would’ve notified the bouncer/security to remove him from the premises if possible. My partner on the other hand was numb to this whole ordeal and thought nothing much of it. One other guy friend of mine added his view that guys usually enjoy it, since it is a dream come true for guys to be seen as sexual objects. Of course I disagree. I think that some guys do find it very disturbing if someone (anyone) slaps their ass and show sexual aggression towards them in any shape or form.

Many people said that even though there may be some guys who would feel that way, it is usually different for men and women. Yes, it is true. Since in most cases men are stronger than women physically, and there are more sexual assaults and violence committed towards women by men than the other way around, (47,000 women are raped every year in the UK (BCS, 2001)) the connotation one sexual assault holds from one sex to another is different depending on who commits the act.

However, this does not make the act a non aggressive act. Ass slapping perhaps is just a minor form of sexual aggression, but it is still a form that can inflict emotional and physical harm upon people. In addition, if we let this type of aggression slip, it can lead to more types of aggression that can inflict greater harm.

The point that this woman used – “well, guys do it all the time” is sometime used by women to justify their behaviours. Since men have used aggression towards women throughout history, it justifies aggression back towards them as well. In a way, this could be justified as a means to get men aware of how it actually feels to be harassed sexually by the other sex. On the other hand, the problem I have towards this approach is because it entails that women have learnt nothing from the wrong doings and the misogyny history of men. We cannot and should not repeat the horrid acts men have over centuries afflicted upon women but the other way around. We should learn from the agony and the pain caused from these acts, and make sure when women’s emancipation is reached (or when women take over the world) that we do not cause each other pain and no sex is tormented by the other.

That is my definition of emancipation. The goal is not to oppress men as they did to us, but to make everyone is equal and where both sexes can live in harmony...

London burning

2011-08-11T09:07:00.006+02:00

It brings me great pain and sadness to see London being torn apart as it has in the past few days by riots and looting.
However, I do not stand with people who believe that this is just a mere criminal activity, a great big party set up by urban youths, just because the items and the shops that are being looted are more commercial than symbolic of the state.
Let us not forget that this is exactly what happened when Rodney King was brutally beaten by the police in Los Angeles in 1992, and then it was the Korean shops that were looted.
One of the key words that keeps coming up in many of the commentaries not only from journalists, practitioners working in the communities, but also academics is the term “nothing to lose”. What this means is simple. Who in their right mind with a proper job, salary and a home would want to risk their life to go and loot. The reason for this is because they have too much to lose if it were the case that they may be caught by the police. Also another reason would be that they would already have the resources to buy these things rather than looting them if they really needed them. On the other hand for the rioters at the street now, this is not the case. Mentioned several times by other columnists, they really have no other means and in a way this is their way of getting back at society that put them in a pit for a long time, getting the items they have been exposed constantly as their passport to a good life.
However, this does not make it any less political than let’s say if they were to attack monuments. If they were to have had a good political strategy which the middle class could’ve also agreed to, I would’ve been happy to say that at least someone made great efforts to make sure that the improvished youth got some education – and I mean education as in the miseducation of lauren hill, not high school education. I am sorry that these rioters- or at least many who participated – did not get to read Marx, Trostsky, Chomsky, Naomi Klein and other contemporary thinkers about political uprising and the state of the world today that many of us in the middle class get to read. I am sorry that they do not read the guardian and al jajerra and keep up to date on what is happening with the world. However, this does not give us the right to judge what is and what isn’t a proper justified riot, and what is and what is not political for these people.The whole point is that this group of individuals as an isolated class of society decided to express their ever growing anger and frustration out the way they know best. In this respect UK is in a much worse situation than in Spain and Greece in terms of educating, enlightening their youths – if we just compare the patterns of riots.
Of course there are some that say, "why don’t they just try harder and get out of their situation as some of us did?"- mentioned by a friend, if I understood correctly, who was the only mixed white-asian minority in a white majority neighbourhood. This is quite different from what is happening here, where people believe to have been attacked as a social group rather than one individual in society. Thus this is why they are acting as a social group. Also, we have already seen so many studies that show how the myth that is the “hard working American dream”. The truth of the matter is, it is incredibly hard for most of these kids to actually gain that ticket out of urban jungles and as a social worker who has worked in these neighbourhoods, we are essentially lying to them if we tell them that if they work hard they will achieve the dream that is shown at them constantly through television screens. The reality is that for many of them hard work will only be rewarded by low-wage insecure jobs which will not allow you to even get off of social security, regardless how hard you try.
Some people say, but wait a minute, many other ethnic minorities do make it – look at the Asian American communities in the States. I will tell them, if you look at the history of Asian American communities, many of the 1st generations were actually from high socio-economic positions in their own country, and were only put in lower social classes due to that they have migrated to the States. These parents – and their smart genes which is one of the biggest indicator of a child’s academic achievement – put great effort in their children because they come from the “middle class” culture where education is put first etc. This is not the case for many other minorities. You cannot use the success case of one group and blame another that they are not following suit. The groups have very different characteristics and starting points.
This is not to say I condone the riots and the loots and its incredibly sad and frightening to watch, especially given that I am on my way to move there myself. However, it is not the answer to just blame those who take part, categorizing again as “us” and the bad “them”. I am not saying they have no fault, they do and probably will be punished very firmly for it (Actually I am afraid their punishment will come much quicker and harder than for those who took much more money in greater lengths – yes I mean the financial sector). However, how many of us can really say that put in the same situation - I don’t mean you now just being there, but having that family history, living under such circumstances from birth and so forth – would’ve absolutely not have done what has happened? Can we really say that “they” are completely different people who are essentially different from “us”? I just want to emphasize again that if we consider this as a mere criminal activity, we will stop at prosecuting those who have taken part. However, as mentioned again and again, this is a politically derived phenomenon where the social structure has played an important part. If there are no changes made, this is bound to happen again in another 30 years (’81 Brixton riots) with the next generation. Just as a side note, I believe that the same actually goes for the financial crisis. The bankers are not essentially evil people who are very different from the rest of us by birth because they are driven by greed and have no morals – much of that, no not all, is from the system that enable them to act as such and know that they have much more to gain than to lose. If we do not understand this, progress cannot be made.

ad sense

2011-07-23T21:38:00.002+02:00

okay. The thing you see on the right side there....I am only trying this for the experience so don't think i've sold my soul to the devil.
I'll take it down in due time.

Who should pay for dates?

2011-07-23T15:01:00.005+02:00

So, the top headline of the "feminist" online magazine Jezebel today is that Kelly Ripa apparently argued that women picking up the check on dates are "gross", and because women give birth men should pick up the check.

Here you can see the jezebel article and the video of the whole thing.

There has been a whole discussion underneath it arguing one way or the other.
Surprisingly, many women argue that "If you ask a women out on a date, you should pay. I would pay if I asked a guy out"

But let's think about this a bit more. Why do women expect men to pay for dates in some cultures?
Ask men.co.uk, answers that men should pay most of the dates till month 3, and then wean off to every third time during the following month.
The reason for this is because

"The first two months provide guys the opportunity to prove they’re solvent, capable and understand the social conventions of dating -- and all are three important qualities ladies will be looking for in a date."

Sounds fair enough... but why don't the guys try to find that quality in a women, to see if the WOMEN are solvent and capable etc??

Another example....
So a friend of mine in Korea who has also lived in the States for a long period of time, when she went out on dates she wouldn't even take her wallet/purse with her. She expected the guy to pick her up from home, take her out - wine, dine the whole shebang - and then bring her back safe and sound.
But I ask, she makes quite alot of money herself, then isn't it unfair? No, she argues, because she spends time and money to make herself pretty and gets ready for the date.
In that sense, guys are investing their money for a hot chick returns?

But I mean it is not really sensible nor is it sustainable. Unless the guy is rather rich, he cannot afford to pay for everything, or else he would be broke or in debt rather quickly, or you won't have any dates due to it. Ofcourse I've seen in some case in Korea that women would thus give their boyfriends large chunks of money in private so that he can indeed pay for her in public. Thus are the norms of chivarly.

How is it done here - in the Netherlands/Germany? In many cases even on first dates, regardless who asked who out, you split the check. Sometimes I know it is not fair given that I've only had the main course and you the three course meal, but hey that's how it goes. Sometimes one person may pay for the whole thing than you pay for the next round. Also, even have lived in several countries I always had the pleasure of dating guys who did not feel threatened at all when I paid for them. Actually, in many cases I had more doe then them so I paid alot for many of my past boyfriends. Even now, in my relationship I am officially win the bigger chunk of the bread and spoil my partner with extravagant parties and gifts.

But let's try to understand some other points here. You pay because I give birth?
This is silly in many ways.
1. I do not give birth to the spawn of all the men I've dated and paid for my dinner. If you follow your logic, it would lead to "Since I paid you should give birth (to my child)"
2. As someone in the discussion at Jezebel pointed out, its not like we can pay for the guys dinners and they give birth.
3. Why is reproduction and financial contribution to a relationship even related??
Also for those who said men should pay for the dates since they asked them out- it seems that the they also assume that guys also should ask them out on the first dates as well. I really genuinely want to ask them, how many times have they asked guys out and what is that in proportion to how many times you've been on dates in total?
I believe that both parties should pay, and actually the party who is earning more or had more to eat should pay more because that would actually make sense.

The most important issue is that this type of thinking, that guys should pay for girls etc. re-enforces the view that men should be earning more. For example, in the recent case suit again Wallmart for its sexist corporate policies, it has been shown that Wallmart pays its male employees more because "they have families to support."

Thus, in no countries, yes even the gender egalitarian Scandinavian countries, is gender pay gap overcome. On average in Europe women earn about 1/5th less than their male counterparts.

Here are a list of European countries with their respective pay gap. For more information about gender pay gap and EU's response
I am not going to expand on why there is a gender pay gap. If you want, come to one of my gender wage gap classes. ;)

But one thing that is clear is that although many of these women mentioned above would be furious about men being paid more than women, but their minds are still stuck in Victorian times when they talk about paying for dates, and when the issue turns into relationship related.
I think alot of this comes from the fact that rationally we believe in equal rights for both genders but emotionally, it is hard to fully embrace the progressive views on relationships. This is because we've been socialised in a conservative way, not only by our parents but society and not to mention mass media and the film industry (which is very conservative). Chick flicks, romantic comedies, even childrens animation with any romantic connotation are all based on the idea of old fashion chivalry where men take charge, protect women physically and financially.
Thus it may be easier to promote gender equality amongst your colleagues and friends, when it comes to the intimate relationships with your partner you may loose that sense of progressiveness and fall into the trap of "romance" defined by others.

I'm not saying all women are like this, but many are and by no means am I completely exempted from this as well. It is a continuous fight, and if we want to win in the bigger front, we need to also be aware and alert in the homefront.

panic attacks

2011-07-23T01:02:00.000+02:00

All throughout my life, or as long as I can remember, I had panic attacks during sleep. The first ones I can remember started as early as when I was only 6 or 7, and I still have them on occasions. They all share the similarity that they happen when I am asleep, and that despite the fact that the reason behind the attacks are associated to the various situations that were appropriate in that phase of life, the feeling of the attacks are the same. This great urgency feeling that I am not doing whatever I am/was supposed to be doing, that I failed to do what I was expected to do in the greater scheme of things, whatever that was.

When I was 6, and thus the first attacks I remember, was almost always during my naps. As this blog title shows I was quite insatiable. I wanted to do everything, and more than the rest of my peers. The only way to do that, at the age of 6 and also later on, was to skip some of the things one was expected to do. Since I was not a patient person, ever, I needed to fast forward or skip altogether some steps/tasks one needed to do. One of that was the afternoon nap. I carefully calculated, as a young child, that if I would skip my noon naps, than I could read all the books I wanted to read that day ( I was a voracious reader at that age, a habit I "overcame" during my puberty) AND be able to play outside with my mates. Ofcourse, despite my high hopes I was not able to do this, and I, with my ever heavy eye lid, feel hostage of the mid-day slumber fairy that forced us into the deep hazy pool of slumber. During these times I would have the panic attacks, and these were attributed to my want or need to play with my friends outside, and my inability to do so due to the fatigue that I have been infected with.
Even with the panic attacks, I would fail to tumble into the waking world. After a struggle with my urges to play and the fairy's spell of slumber, the spell would always win and I would only awake when it was too late to go and play.
However, I would always remember these attacks and always be dissapointed in myself that I was not able to fight the very simple urges of fatigue and sleep.

The second round of attacks came during my last years of high school. They happened when I fell into my food coma states after dinner (which would've been actually the fourth warm meal of the day). My voracious appetite for books and words had morphed into my appetite for food. These were quite clear to me as well. They had to do with the fact that I was living in a culture where a strict regime of not sleeping apparently was thought as the key to one's academic success. As it was known then at the time "4 fail 3 succeed". This meant that if you slept 4 hours a day(at night), you will fail your college entrance exam, and you will succeed if you were to sleep only 3. Thus were the great ideals that made korea into what it is...
Anyhow, if you are that age, eating great deal amount of food and not being able to sleep proper during nights, it does happen that you wake up at random times during your naps in frantic panic... "s*** I should be studying"

For awhile these attacks seem to go away, but came back occasionally - for example, when I was in Edinburgh - which seem to be linked with my brain not registering that I've actually moved a continent away from home. I also had them again when I started a relationship with my boyfriend in berlin, and till now on occasion.

However, they were now very irritating due to that my conscious had failed to link with the unconscious attacks on finding the appropriate reason behind these spells.

Now even worse, and the real freaky thing is that I do them without noticing. Apparently I also make very clear audible sentences while I have these attacks. Last one seem to come with a sentence "Hey! (insert name here)! Weren't you supposed to give me something?" - apparently I did this while looking at (insert name here) - and yes in the middle of the night. Luckily enough my partner is not known to be freaked out easily.

After a long thought, I am still quite curious... what is it. is it, a baby?? Is that what my body is doing? Attacking my partner that he hasn't gotten me knocked up already, that behind my back(or my conscious self)?
That would be quite funny though, if I had some sort of alter ego that comes out in very sporadic moments - while I have no control over my self (read sleep)- to express my inner thoughts. hmmm. ofcourse if this were to grow out of proportion, I would either end up schitzo or like this guy who I know, who ended up in the laundry room in the basement of his apartment complex totally naked not knowing why how and when he came down there in such manner.
Thank god that hasn't happened (knock wood)
The best i got till now is singing silly songs and accusing people of not giving me things.

Ofcourse there was this one time when I was sharing a room with another friend who talks in her sleep and we were having full on in sleep conversations until she started giving me too random answers that didn't fit right in my dream.... but anyways.

(half of this blog entry was written on the 5th of april, 2010 and the other half on the 23rd of July 2011)

Amsterdam Insider's Tip: Drinks

2011-07-07T15:31:00.010+02:00

So, I should be working, but I realised I haven't written anything in my blog for awhile. Thus decided to provide the world abit more of my good will and wisdom ;) before the year is completely over.
Also, I am terribly unproductive during the month of July - although my garden is growing like a jungle.

Anyhow, the first edition of Amsterdam's insider's tip is where to go drinking.
Abit background. I've lived in the Netherlands for 6 years now, but actually my trips to Amsterdam date back from when I lived in Edinburgh, but dated an Amsterdammer (which is btw what the rest of the Netherlands call a taller glass of beer)
Another background of why Drinking is put here as the first, is because Amsterdam is better in terms of drinking than food.(but food I will come back to later.)

Anyhow, here are my favourites in themes but first some rules.

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1. First Rule
DO NOT DRINK neither at LEISEPLEIN nor Rembrandtplein.
Seriously, these are the most touristy places in Amsterdam and the beer sometimes cost twice as much as you would usually pay. Rather go to nieuwemarkt, jordaan, and really just anywhere but there.(having said this some places not smack inside these areas but in the surrounding areas are quite alright)

2. Second rule
Order a Vaasje otherwise you will get a fluitje - which is like a shot of beer.

3. Third rule
you DON'T have to tip waiters/waitresses at bars, and also when they bring you beer/drinks you would usually round it up. Don't change this culture by bringing your own tipping culture into this world - yes I am looking at you guys Americans!
(but ofcourse you can tip for good service)

So the thematic places.

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Breweries and distilleries

*Brouwerij 't IJ : is the Amsterdam home grown organic beer at the East side, with their own traditional windmill!! They have one of the most delicious beers you can find, and hey you drink it from the source. It also has a nice terras(beer garden) right next to the waters. What else do you want? - the bars that are open right next to the brewery opens from 3~8pm so don't be late! Don't forget to try their sausages and cheese with the beer.

*Wynand-Fockink: is a liqueur distillery in the heart of Amsterdam. they have several different liqueurs starting from lemon, blue berry to some strange names, such as attic ?? The tasting room also opens from 3pm to 9pm, so go there early! The shots are about 1.5euros each and they really fill it up to the top!

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For the hipsters/artsies

*Cafe Brecht: vintage furniture, all sorts of Germany beers and an lounge like atmosphere with a piano inside. IT looks like something out of Prenzlauer Berg. Also they have poetry reading nights. A Great place for book worms.

*W139: This bar/club gallery space which used to be a squat is a hipster central of Amsterdam. Every weekend it looks like someone threw up hipster all of the street. Very artsy group of people.

* Kriterion: A bar next to the student run artsy/alternative cinema Kriterion provide another alternative bar scene for students but also a wide range of people. They have DJs during weekends and it becomes quite crowded.

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For the Punks
Go to squats - such as OCCII, OT 301, Joe's garage and Blijvertje.
Otherwise.. here are some alternatives.

* Sound garden: this is probably the only punkish bar in amsterdam. Yeah, Amsterdam doesn't do punk. There is a pool table and a wonderful beer garden next to the waters which draws alot of punkish alternative crowds but also very international crowds.

* Pacfic Parc: okay this isn't really punk, but still the closest you get to it. It has a nice outside area next to waters and has really good music events.

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Terrases and water
Amsterdam is well known for having nice places to hang next to the waters.
Here are my favourites

* Noorderlicht: This is right on the NDSM island, which you have to take a ferry to get to. This looks like a converted green house that changed its function into a bar/restaurant. When the weather is nice, they have nice bbqs and really comfy couches just outside next to the water. This cannot even be counted as a terras since its just outside in the "wild" so to say. During the evenings they also have parties/djs and live music. however, don't forget the last ferry back to civilization leaves around midnight!

*Cafe Hesp: is right next to the Amsterdam Amstel River. Thus it has the advantage of having this massive terras next to the river.It also has its own brewed beer. Perfect place to catch that bit of afternoon sun while lounging next to the river.

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cozy areas

There are loads of cozy bars around Amsterdam, in the centre.
however, here are some that are even extra cozy.

Cafe Langereis: This is smack in the centre but still has that extra cozy sweet living room feeling to it without having to pay for the extra costs.

Cafe Skek: This is a student run cafe/bar, which has music evenings during Thrusday to Sunday. Also has nice foods. Check out its cozy attic like room, where you really can fit 6 persons or so, and a window looking towards the stage area.

Cafe Zeppos: This place has a nice winter garden, with all the flowers and plants inside!
They also provide some nice food and good quality jazz music during weekends.

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I strongly believe that too much choices makes one depressed as well, so I stop here but I must say that there are quite alot of places I haven't really mentioned but are nice... so try the others out as well!

Inside job & the state of our society

2011-04-02T00:05:00.010+02:00

This is must see movie about the causes and the state of affairs of the financial crisis, focusing on the US.
The key points of this movie are as follows.
* the financial crisis was largely due to very risky investments made by banks (on bad loans)
* the banks/financial organisations also made it so that they bet against themselves as well so that they make money when the loans defaulted
* the government institutions (assessment institutions and regulation institutions) that were set up to restrict the risky business transactions and secure private investors/loaners are "owned" by the banks and thus there were in fact no regulatory systems to hold the powers of capital back
* the government is largely "owned" by the banks due to that most of the people working for the government that advise on or make the policies are former chiefs of these banks and firms and/or still have interest in them
* even the economists in universities are bought out by the fact that they receive large sums of money for writing papers/analysis that favour the risky deals made by bankers and they serve and receive money for being in board members of the most fraudulent banks
* the bankers gained incredible amounts of money while the rest of society had to pay for it
* even now not a single one of these bankers have been prosecuted concerning the fraudulent deals that they made

....

This movie is down right scary. It shows how in this society when we deregulate so that capital can actually unleash its power how dangerous it could be. These bankers made billions of dollars while making risky deals which they knew could fail but would not affect their gains. One thing we must admit is that these are not horrible people - although I sometimes wonder how they could do such things and sleep at night or live without feeling utter guilt. I believe that once in that position, once in the race for more money and it is possible to do so, since there are not any bodies to regulate this behaviour, it becomes a matter of if I do not do it, the other guy would anyhow - why should I not make money out of this when they let the other guy do so.

The problem is that since capital indeed holds power to a incomprehensible amount, there is really no power that can regulate it. Capital holds power not only in politics(congress/lobbyists etc), but also information(news networks/economists in universities and research centres etc). Since everyone needs money and since it is rather necessary and helpful to do anything, such as run for congress...(especially due to that politics is now a PR game more than anything else)... banks literally own the world.

What the rest of the population is left with is one of the largest public cuts since the last Deregulation period in the 80s with Regan and Thather - only because they had to bail out these banks which made money through these deals.

let's just get more in detail and calculate this abit more.

UK 2007 bank bonuses was announced be 11 billion pounds. even in 2009 this was 7.3billion and 2010 7 billion.
For me, I think regardless of what you've actually done- even if you found cure for cancer- NOTHING can justify a 10 million euro bonus/year on top of your 1million salary. Seriously WHAT COULD YOU HAVE POSSIBLY DONE mr.banker? no you do not deserve it. Here is someone else's take on the problem with this.
Anyhow, many of these banks had to be bailed out with a 400billion pound injection
to save the deficit that came from these injections and bankruptcies, the national health service- the free health national health insurance system of the UK will have to cut 20 billion - which means cuts in staff and supply - which means that many will not be able to get the proper treatment they need.
This would essentially mean that many will eventually die and suffer tremendously- because they are cutting down a health system which already has problems of not being able to address the illness of individuals fast enough.
And let's not forget about the dramatic increase in inequality or the decrease in real wages of workers in the past few decades...

But wait. It doesn't stop there. In the most recent elections in the UK, the Netherlands, Germany which all took after the recession- ALL countries have had the conservatives win.
All of whom had announced massive budget cuts while not regulating banking systems nor excessive incomes which are not based on real production of anything.
Why are people voting for these conservatives?? I absolutely have no idea.

However, people are acting more directly as well..
Its good to hear there are things being done to stop this in some countries. But in general, not much is being done.

And in recent times there has been movement to think that perhaps we are at the end of a capitalist society perhaps as Marx predicted it, and capital has been let loose out of its reins and due to it, accordingly there will be an uprising by the people (proletariat)- such as the one we saw in Egypt, Libya, London...
Perhaps not, perhaps we are in the mist of being completely owned by big capital and the middle class will essentially collapse totally.

The catch also is that through this financial crisis everyone is put at a situation where one has to be working like crazy to save one's ass - thus does not have time to think about the true problems of society. For this reason, this movie really hits the spot that really needs to be hit in current society.

Here is something more just to get you thinking abit harder

You Decide

2011-01-12T11:40:00.003+01:00

So readers, I don't know how many of you are out there, and will read this, but for some of you who've noticed, this blog will turn 5 years old on the 21st of January.
Hurrah!

To celebrate, I will ask you the readers to send me any topic you wish to read about - or more so, that you want me to write about.
The deadline is till the 20th of January, 2011, and the post will be up on the 21st or 22nd or 23rd (depending on how busy and lazy I feel).

I know this may result in no suggestions, but hey, I am a optimist

Tiger mom or just crazy conservative mom?

2011-01-12T09:27:00.017+01:00

So, I am guessing many of you read the WSJ article by Amy Chua on her new book on parenting, called the "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother".
Well, you should've known about it since it cause so much controversy and attention, including one blogpost that simple write "PS. You Suck" (most of the sentences start with "And Fuck you..")

The whole story can be summed up by these few lines

"Here are some things my daughters, Sophia and Louisa, were never allowed to do:
• attend a sleepover
• have a playdate
• be in a school play
• complain about not being in a school play
• watch TV or play computer games
• choose their own extracurricular activities
• get any grade less than an A
• not be the No. 1 student in every subject except gym and drama
• play any instrument other than the piano or violin"

abit harsh parenting techniques?
I have to say, regardless of whether or not it is painful to admit, my parent's parents and up to my parent's generation took this "Tigerness" as a rule of thumb guide to parenting. Although the intensity of it was not as strong as Mrs. Chua's - for example, i think everyone was allowed to have play dates and watch TV.
The whole point is that this Confucius parenting style which used to be hailed as a good parenting technique, is no longer the case for several downsides our societies saw due to it.

20 or so years ago, we all learned about the wonderful mother Shim Saimdang the great mother of scholar Yi I - how she cut rice cakes in the dark, while she made her son write Chinese calligraphy over and over again.... yeah, he achieved much. he became the great politician and spread Confucianism throughout Korea. (yeah, well done, go pat yourself on the back) This was THE way to raise your child, or so people thought those days.
This great tradition of raising your children was still seen when I was going to highschool - mind you this is 20 years ago. Yet, although there were strict parents, they were not that strict as Ms. Chua put it as it should be.

However, this is now not the case, and the reason is because the problems started to outweigh the benefits.

One of the reasons for this parenting was that this is an effective parenting technique when you have several children (like 7, which my dad's family had) and not enough time to actually respond to them as individuals. One of the core key element of Confucius teaching/parenting techniques is that you set the rules, children are to abide by it, and no questions asked. IF you have 7~10 children running around, perhaps it is easier to raise children as such. However, about 30~40 years ago, when people started having 1 or 2 children, this method ceased to have its perks due to that with this small number of children, it was easy to see them as what they were. Individuals.

In addition, this strict method actually decreased the much necessary technique of being creative. I remember although I was one of the best in art class when I was in the US, and was even toying with the idea of becoming an artist, when I came back to Korea that ambition went straight down the toilet. Why? because the teachers, using the same Confucius techniques, told me exactly what to draw, how to do it, and how to colour I should use etc. When I told them that is not what I want to do, they told me it was wrong and punished me either by giving me a bad grade and/or giving me (those days physical) punishment for talking back. That really killed the inner creativity of Korea, not just for me but for many of us. That is why we have one of the highest shares of technically skilled "artists" in the world, but we end up in sweat shops colouring in The Simpson's cartoon as designed by the Americans. This is why we hear all these stories of how in the prestigious music conservatories across the world, countless numbers of students from Asia come to study classical music, but fail to get admission. This is not because of their technical skills, which is far better than the other students, but their soul is missing, or they do not have any creativity in how they play. Having been forced to play an instrument for several years - without having a personal urge to do so, like Amy Chua is doing to her kids, - I can imagine why your piano playing will not sound joyful although technique wise it is perfectly played.(and yes, I don't care if your child played at a great concert hall, all I care is whether or not if she or he was able to enjoy that, feel the energy of the composer and was able to digest it as her own) With an even greater emphasis on creativity and uniqueness in this day and age, the strict top-down parenting techniques do not provide the necessary skills for the children of today and in the future.

Even if creativity was not a big issue, the strict parenting, especially of fathers, resulted in major family crises. Fathers were being left out of the family since he was always the (more) strict one, also combined with the crazy working hours of the Korean workforce, this meant that fathers after awhile were strangers to the family, no longer able to connect with anyone. Thus, in the past decade or so, there have been several courses offered in Korea for fathers to start getting in touch with their families and themselves emotionally.

The emphasis on education and high expectation on academic achievement led to one of the highest PISA scores and the (second) highest college graduate rate in the world. However, Korea also has one of the highest suicide rates in the world, many of which are Korean high-school students who believe they are worthless due to their low academic achievement, and others who under the strict parenting regime never learned to love themselves because of the fact that they did not achieve as much as they were told they needed to. Nor did they learn the skills to accept failure, not focus on it, but embrace other things that are still thriving in their lives.

So the fact of the matter is, we need to decide: do we want higher academic achieving non creative kids who killed themselves? or happy creative unique kids who are alive?

Why is Amy Chua and so many Asian American(other countries?) mothers applying such rules even when the "old country" has abandoned them? I think this may be due to the phenomenon that the Asian-Americans tend to latch on to the traditional values they knew when they (or their parents) left the country. Whereas the country itself changes in a very dynamic way and changes its values and norms accordingly. In addition, you have to understand that Asian-Americans are still minorities who are under racist societies. More than the Asians in Asia, they need to prove themselves that they are not second rate citizens, but that they are actually better than the majority. One way of doing that is to show that they can out-do everyone in the most commonly appreciated things, such as social position, income generation, education achievement etc. It is abit sad to see that even the second, third generations have to suffer from all this as well. Especially, when these achievements have really nothing to do with how happy or satisfied this person is. These are mostly attributions that are needed to show others what a great life you have and what others see as your achievements. All you achieve then is happiness through other people's eyes, but not of your own. But I mean, you won't make a statement by making well rounded individuals, or it is much more noticeable when you make rich or high educational achieving individuals.

Having said all this, one thing we must embrace about this tiger mother, is that she never gives up. Her efforts in supporting her children is endless and even when the child feels hopeless, the Mom is always there in 100% belief that her child has a gift for everything. Given in the right dosage, this is a wonderful thing to have as a child.(again given in the right dosage. oh yeah, the cynicism of (some and definitely my) East Asian moms are also fantastic to make sure you don't take yourself too seriously)

---ps. I must've written this in such a haste, because re-reading it, it is sooo full of grammatical and spelling mistakes, it is rather embarrassing. I hope you didn't mind (you the reader, yes you there, who is still reading up to here!)

Asian girls before and after make up

2011-01-10T13:37:00.007+01:00

I don;t know about you, but the girl in the left is far more attractive and sexy to me

This site has a collection of asian girls before and after putting make-up on.
Jezebel wrote how surprising it is to see the uniformity of the ideas of beauty.

"In all three cases, individuality is stripped away to achieve a clear and cohesive standard of "beauty." Here, that apparently means anime eyes, kiss-pout mouths, and the general stripping of 10 years off of one's age.
Read more"

I agree with them somewhat, which is something I wrote here few years ago.

To be honest, the girls in these photos actually do not look all the same. There are some cute bunny girly types and the more sexy types. So, I do not completely agree.
What is sad to see and I must say is that most of them strip themselves of the intelligent looking unique characters of their own faces to put on the rather "bimbo" "cute" "innocent adolescent girl" face, which is popular in the East-Asian countries (I think these girls are Japanese but they could as well be from Korea, China, Taiwan and other East-Asian countries).
BTW - this is not to say that other countries are exempted from this uniformity of beauty standards and how women minimize their true beauty to make themselves more appealing in the dating market. (which is also in a way an insult to men and hinders any development towards cultivating a true culture of the sense of beauty). *sigh*
(for more before/after make up)

PS. after looking at more photos(especially of gallery 2), I retract my statement from saying "all of them strip themselves..." to "most of them". because some of them actually just look quite alright, and not gone through the process of bimbo-ing themselves.

Stop recycling.... Let's start REUSING IT!

2011-01-03T21:28:00.014+01:00

I don't know when this happened, probably after these mass campaigns on ecological awareness of production processes and this new wave of eco-chic, but I am slowly becoming more and more aware of consumption and how ridiculous some things are.

In the past few weeks, what has been bothering me the most is packaging.
Although we only see the primary packaging (what the product is actually wrapped in), there is also secondary and transit packaging, which I will not even go into.
But even primary packaging. Half of all packaging is plastic and 25% paper/board, 10% glass. Of these, currently in Amsterdam, with the exception of beer bottles and a small portion of PET bottles, NONE of them are being re-used.(excluding the niche bio-market packaging that is being re-used in a much smaller scale).
Although we try to feel better about ourselves by saying we recycle it, but think about it again. These products/packaging are made so that they last (almost) a life time/forever. That is why plastic doesn't rot, because it was meant to be used forever! However, we don't. And the best we do is recycle it. But recycling is not RE-cycling, its DOWN-cycling.
When we recycle a glass product, it means that it is first smashed up, probably mixed in with non-glass products to make a not as good quality re-cycled glass product. Throughout this whole process we use energy and other natural resources. And apparently recycling wine bottles leave as much carbon foot print, as making a new wine bottle. - and let's not forget that not all glass products are recycled.(In Germany, the recycling country of the world, only 82% of glass products are recycled. In the UK, this is about 60%)

Now think about the glass products that we usually use.
Just to give you an example in my household, the bottles we have are predominately wine bottles and glass jars that holds things, such as pickles.
Wine bottles for example, are almost uniform in their shapes, and can actually be re-used just like beer bottles. Why are we not doing this? ( This post says that it has been due to technological problems, but also interests behind making new bottles. Fortunately enough there have been movements to change this, and businesses are being set up to re-use bottles.)

But still what really gets me going, is how Albert Heijn, the biggest supermarket in the Netherlands, where it really has a monopoly in supermarket goods, does not even re-use their own product packaging - for example the juice bottles. See, if it is your own product, you cannot use the excuse of "not same standard" nor the "takes more energy to take it back to the production field/factory" excuse.
They have the network and I bet you that their costumers are enlightened enough to bring the bottles back, even if it did not have a "statiegeld"-deposit for it!!

Just some of the EASILY reusable products from Albert Heijn.

So... Here is a little campaign I am going to start.
Go here: https://www.ah.nl/klantenservice/contact/overalbertheijn
Choose overige, for your onderwerp.
and write down
"Dear Albert Heijn, Hello. I am a very frequent customer of yours, but I have a complaint. I am wondering why you do not re-use your bottles and jars of your own products- such as the Albert Heijn Juice or Jam, and the plastic packaging - such as the Alert Heijn ready to eat products. Recycling takes as much energy and leaves as much carbon foot print as making new products. By not re-using the packaging, this puts me and many others off of buying the mentioned products. on the other hand, I will be more than happy to bring the used bottles, jars, cartons back to Albert Heijn for free, or will be willing to be charged "statiegeld"- deposit, when I purchase these products. I hope you listen to our plea. Best wishes, [YOUR NAME]"

PS. Ofcourse, when I tried this, the albertheijn site didn't work......!@*@#&@*!

bad decisions

2010-12-01T11:59:00.001+01:00

The problem with bad decisions is that, you never quite know if it is a bad decision until it is already too late.

Angie becomes Geertje

2010-10-18T10:44:00.002+02:00

So, this weekend, German Chancellor Angela Merkel announced that

"Multi-culturalism is dead.... long live multi-culturalism"

no the last bit of the sentence I put in.
She actually said, how guest workers (Gastarbeiters) that came to lift up the economy during the 60s (and till now!) have not left as the Germans had once believed, but now the Germans and the immigrants could not "live happily side by side".

The reasons noted not only by her, but others is that
1. too many come
2. they all bring their (large) families)
3. they eat up all the welfare checks

The thing I would like to know is
1. how many did actually came in the last decades
2. Does the German government believe in splitting up families? So you only want to bring in the young workers, without their dependents?
3. Did you not think of this when you wanted to import (skilled) workers?
4. What exactly is the proportion of migrants on welfare schemes - I ask this, since I know they will not make it easy to get ANY migrants on it
5. How much of the recent/past economic growth can you attribute to the migrant community??
6. WHO do you exactly define as migrants anyhow? Are you saying those who were born in Germany but of different ethnicity are also migrants? - since these days "migrant" is just a way for them to say "middle eastern/muslim"....

about question number 5, and 4
Migrant workers are a great asset, fuel of economic growth when the economy is doing well and there is a worker/ skill shortage. This is when the media and the politicians shut the **ck up about migration issues. On the other hand, in economic conditions such as now, in recession, companies let go of the vulnerable workers first - thus the women and migrants. Also, in times of uncertainty, employers will not employ new workers, but when they do, they go back into the traditional way of thinking - employing white men.
Thus, when we say migrants are on welfare checks, let;s really see who it is to blame. I know that there are asylum seekers that can be categorized as abit different case, but really what is this percentage, and again whose fault is it- their fault or the failure of the integration/training policies? Also, if you fail to accept those in dire situation, what type of world wide brotherhood are we supporting?

but overall, why isn't anyone showing hard proof concerning this at all?
and another thing, who can really define who "immigrants" are? Who are we kidding pretending nations have existed for a long time? its only in the past one of two decades that countries formed their current boundaries. and Even before then, there were loads of mass migrations all over. Do nations really have the legitimacy to say who the country belongs to?
I believe that migration is the easy way out for many politicians when they want to make a grand reform on the current social security/assistance scheme, so it doesn't upset their main voting population. Unfortunately, this whole scheme is working...

How capitalism gets a grasp on you

2010-10-12T21:58:00.002+02:00

There is a saying, many of you know different versions of.
it goes roughly

"If you are not a Marxist at a young age, you are an idiot,
if you are a Marxist as an older adult, you are an idiot"

It more or less talks about how as a young person one should dream of the idealism of society, but come to the cold sense of real life when one becomes an "adult".
Having been a Marxist when I was young (yes, despite some entries telling you otherwise, yours truly is not as stupid as one may think), I always thought this quote was preposterous, idiotic and not true. Once a Marxist, always a Marxist. Although I did fear the moment when I have lost my true hearts without even noticing.

Now being in an age where one could be categorized as the "older adult", I understand why this quote comes about. Not because Marxism is too idealistic, but because capitalism really gets a grasp on you, and it is very difficult to escape its reigns.

After graduating, one will find a job. A Job will usually be something about 40 hours, which is what my contract is. It is a rather well paying position, although I am not making banker's bonuses, I do not complain. I would actually like to work shorter hours, but that is not really a possibility for me at this position I am in.
This is also enforced due to that I could not find a cheaper place for us to live. Living with my partner, we tried to find something which is not big, but also not too expensive. However, the housing market is made so there is either rooms for students, single persons' housing, or big ass couple/family housing. At least in Amsterdam, there is no middle ground, especially in the renter's market. Or, what happens is that the amount of money you spend per square meter increase dramatically when the size becomes below 100m2. When children come, it would be worse, you feel that you need to provide for them the best there is... and what about all the other stuff, such as bio-food, stylish clothes, and insurance for when things do not go as smoothly. One cannot but work full time. Especially since when you start working, naturally you do get into the rat race of them all. Its okay when you are not playing at all, but when you do, you feel a need to succeed.

However, working full time, and having a long commute, one really looses the energy to do anything other than work. When one has free time, it is to relax and relieve stress you get from work. Something like watching mind numbing videos and comedy. When you are physically and emotionally burned out, especially due to the increase in work intensity we have these days, one does not have extra energy to go and ponder upon some of the main questions in life and society. This is the reason why one looses contact with one's political ideals.... pure lack of energy.

Everyone I know after 30, when asked how they are doing, the first thing they'll say is "busy... I'm super busy, but otherwise okay".... regardless of what they do, and whether or not they have children. I think it is even considered a merit to say this, to show people that you are not wasting away your life.

After living like this for awhile, you become mind numbed drones, perfect to be blindfolded unaware of how society is being led. Since all you want is some nice food, a nice vacation and some sleep.

.....
oct 12 2010...very very tired.
need to update this later... but thought I will share this though first.

I like it in my own way, thank you very much

2010-10-07T12:48:00.019+02:00

So, many of you know that Breast Cancer Research Foundation, or aka the pink ribbon group, has launched a campaign in facebook, which was secretly sent out to ladies, to write in their status where they put their purses.

The original message goes like

"About a year ago, we played the game about what color bra you were wearing at the moment. The purpose was to increase awareness of October Breast Cancer Awareness month. It was a tremendous success and we had men wondering for days what was with the colors and it made it to the news.
This year's game has to do with your handbag/purse, where we put our handbag the moment we get home for example "I like it on the couch", "kitchen counter", "the dresser" well u get the idea. Just put your answer as your status with nothing more than that and cut n paste this message and forward to all your FB female friends to their inbox. It doesn't have to be suggestive. I'm going for the vague "on the stairs". The bra game made it to the news. Let's see how powerful we women really are!!! REMEMBER - DO NOT PUT YOUR ANSWER AS A REPLY TO THIS MESSAGE- PUT IT IN YOUR STATUS!"

I didn't know about the last year's campaign and just found out about this years, and have participated. I know some people have had real fun with this, since it was a "inside joke" amongst women, and find it very funny how men reacted. My male friends knew what it was about, and didn't send any questionable remarks.

However, others found this sexist and objectifying women and have made this heard.

Ofcourse as it happens in facebook, this has drawn comments/discussions, and I thought I would share this with my non-facebook friends, since it draws an interesting example of feminist in conflict.

I will try to summarize this discussion, which will really not do anyone justice but again, what is justice anyhow.
Here are the points.
1) campaign was sexist due to its deliberate exclusion of men.
2) it presumes women have either purses and/or sex.
3) It is provoking and has sexual connotations
4) did not help in making the point, which is breast cancer

Let;s respond to this one by one. 1) yes, it is excluding men, but breast cancer is predominately something that women have to deal with, like pregnancy, and the whole point of the joke was to keep it as an insider's joke, which made some people happy. Also many gender equality movements exclude men.
2) I don't think it was sexist to think women can have sex or bags(I've understood this term broadly),
3) I believe women who read this note and put status signs up are able to make this judgement for themselve - they are not stupid
4)Yes, I agree on this issue. it could've been done much smarter, but if the whole point was to draw attention, it succeeded - but I agree it could've been much more linked to the actual cause and abit more stylish. And this point, I think is shared by most people (from the conservatives, to not so conservative, and the times)

Also, my beef with this was that the statement about this whole status update was stated as a "fact" where it is really a "opinion". And the nature of the statement was potentially be offensive to those who participated in the whole scheme. It also had a bullying nature, where it made those who participated feel like they were ignorant and were impediments to the feminist cause.

But more importantly, let's talk about the number 3, provocative and sexual innuendo part of the problem, which is probably the biggest problem the supporters for "the joke being sexist/objectifying" group.
I have always faced criticisms from women on this issue. The example here shows women noting where they put their purse, but give the reader the notion that this is where they would like to have (their bag) sex. This isn't funny at first site, but if you have several status updates doing the same thing, it could be funny.

But whichever the case, even if this were actually about sex, I don't find it objectifying. Definition of objectifying is to make something as if it were an object, rather than a person. Me talking about where I would like to have "it", whatever it may be, does not objectify me. Perhaps it shows that I am a sexual person who may like to share my preferences with others. However, making me into an object it does not. I am also aware that many women are objectified and are objectifying themselves as nothing but something to have sex with. This, if chosen out of ignorance or is forced, it is bad/horrible. But since one of the core human essences are being sexual beings, it is natural to show one's sexual side as well. Ofcourse the stupidity of this is that some women objectifying themselves, may encourage men to think that of other women. However, just because men have dominated the territory of sex for a while now, does not mean that we should shun it as being a wasteland, a place no real feminist goes, unless you want a full on battle to tear down the land - to talk about it seriously.(I am referring to comments such as "If you want to talk about sex openly, admit that you've had it at least once when you didn't really feel like it.Or how you REALLY like it. Or masturbation. Or something"... which indicates sex is supposedly something women should never make light of or joke about). I think women should take the reins of women's sexuality discussions into our own hands but we should also be able to see the lightness in it as well. Thus women in charge of showing women's sexuality, not men in their own fantasy way. The first seasons of sex and the city did improve this aspect... although the later seasons were as if I was watching the video version of Cosmopolitan.

But again, do not discourage women in talking about sex, period, due to the scares of objectifying themselves.The problem with this is that it is dangerously close to the religious/conservative views on how women should be chastised and prude, and women do not have sexuality or their sexualities should be a secret. Ofcourse there are women all over the spectrum of sexual freedom. But to shun the side where one believes women should have fun too and can freely talk and make jokes about sex, to shun those who are not afraid of the male penis, is also not feminism. The problem is that once you do this, once you mark that out of the feminist map, you will have women who will not be able to own their own sexualities, and again this is a battle lost against the conservative male view. Also, it is losing your (potential) freedom to own your own sexuality. Coming from very prudent/conservative countries (I also mean the US here), I know how this could go. Some women believe that equal rights is to make men(and women) fear talking about sex and sexuality, rather than enabling women to take power and lead in the discussion of sex. Where it is believe that sexuality/sexual things are evil, too private to be talked about. This is not a society I will like to live in, nor do I believe is a gender equal society.

Last point I want to make is the ease of calling thing sexist. Being Asian, I also have the god given right to call things racist (no, I don't really but you get my point). Now with both things, its like calling wolf. Once you start calling everything sexist/racist, the gravity of your voice becomes weaker and weaker, since you are thought to be someone who will always be calling "wolf!". Also, the people who can join you in the cause becomes smaller and smaller, since you are excluding diverse views. I believe that this is one of the reasons some women themselves do not want to be categorized as feminist, due to that many "feminists" have marked the line way too strict, restrictive and aggressively and then marked it as being a "general feminist rule". Making feminism something like a totalitarian regime is not something we should aspire to. Taking a strong stand is one thing, being facist is another.

---
someone posted a blog post on this discussion (from the opposing view) - although I disagree with parts of the point 1 & 3 - first of all sex is the way to catch EVERYONE's attention, and I don't think others were excluded, you could've easily did something such as putting a ribbon on your photo, or a link (again its your choice). which is something I also did. but I understand what he's getting at, and is much clearer than what was being mentioned in the previous discussion, so thanks chris!

Watch out Nederland

2010-10-05T10:05:00.008+02:00

"Extremists cause serious damage to you and your society"

Yes, the day that I was dreading is finally here. I mean it was here since a few weeks ago, but the point is that what has once been a feared thought, is now reality. What is it, you ask?

The Dutch government coalition, after several unsuccessful mix matches, which included 6 parties at one point, is now one where the Dutch Conservative party (VVD) and the Dutch Christian Democrats(CDA) is in alliance with the one and only that party with the crazy (fake) blond haired guy, Dutch Freedom party (PVV).
You might think it is really nothing and that everyone knows that he is not meant to be taken seriously. However, I also say that one crazy guy somewhere on his own shouting out things is one thing, him being in the main cabinet coalition is another.

I wonder whether the government understands the gravity of their judgment- I’m looking at you VVD! I understand that for them the main goal was to have a coalition where they can take the majority in parliament to form a cabinet. I’m sorry to say this, but the most important goal in politics is to gain and maintain power- the other political ideals are just small peculiarities that come with the game. Thus, in some way it is understandable that they had to resort to this result.(also I would like to point out some of the members from the other two parties are very against this coalition that they have stepped down – thank you!)

However, it is also clear that this move is potentially putting everyone – yes not only the Dutch but us, the stinking foreigners you guys want to kick out – in danger. Again, one guy shouting obscenities about someone else’s religion is one thing. To have him as a legitimate government party leader is another. Although I am not saying Muslims are aggressive by nature – no, that’s what Geertje is saying. What I want to point out that there are some groups of the Muslim community that have shown that they are able to inflict harm on to society if they feel it necessary. (I also want to point out extremist Christians have also shown this potential several times, and I’m sure other religious extremists are also similar..) Now to have a guy who openly insults that religion and clearly stating that he wants the people who follow this religion, as well as all non-"western"(read blond) foreigners - out of the country he is living in, and to put that guy not only in parliament but also as one of the main government party leaders,… in my opinion that is just putting a big bull’s eye mark straight into the country we call low lands.

What this does is not only putting those who believe in this ideology in danger – which makes sense, since if you want “freedom of speech” as Geert Wilders puts it, you also have to deal with the consequences of your choice – but also others who believe that nut is just plain crazy in danger as well. And this includes those of us who did not even get to have a say in this whole issue.

So, who is to blame here? Of course Geertje is, or his parents or whoever raised that nut case. But also, I blame the sensation seeking news media who has given him too much air time and made his populist ideas go through to the public. Of course the media was the one who had put a stigmatized image on the Muslim community in the Netherlands, showing them off as ganstas and terrorists that disrespect the “Dutch norms”. However, it is also the general public who gave their precious votes to this nut case. I don’t care what type of shit you were fed by PVV or the media. By principle you should never vote for someone whose main message is of hatred and segregation of society. It’s your faults and now it’s the rest of us who have to live with it.

Seriously, I have to take the train to work and take several types of public transportation which could be prone to terrorist activities, and Mr. Wilders you have made my already stressed out life more stressful to think that your voice of hatred will come back and bite, unfortunately not you but us in the ass.
Also, this has not been noted enough, but migrants are not here to use your welfare states. We are here/were here to build up this place, and have contributed so much in terms of not only economic growth but also enhancing society culturally.(not to mention feeding the poorly fed Dutch)

To finish up, Geert Wilders is currently on trial on charges of inciting hatred. I hope, not just for myself but for the sake of all the people who live here, that he is charged. I hope that at least the Dutch judicial system is wise enough to know and show that hatred is not the way to go at things, and it is not okay to trash others, since it does come with consequences.

Berlin insider tips

2010-08-03T12:57:00.005+02:00

Here is a compiled list of places I gathered in my 6 months or so stay in berlin, and also having a berliner as a partner.

hang out places: all with loads of cafes and restaurants
Prenzlauer Berg
especially near kastanienalle/zionskirche
and lychenerstrasse

and
Kreuzberg
especially around Oranienstrasse (near SO36)
and Bergmanstrasse

Galleries and Museums

The East side gallery

for awesome graffiti and all

Museum: I liked the museum of photography (forgot the name but it is in Oranienburger strasse S bahn)
So at the corner where Oranienburger strasse meets Tucholsky Strasse

Also the hambergerbahnhof museum for modern arts is nice

Flea market sundays
Either Mauer park(trendier: nice to just hang without buying stuff) or Boxhagener Platz (cheaper and getting even more trendy)

EAT
Pizza place: il casolare: punk pizza place even the italians love

Also for proper german food try Max and Moritz on Oranienstrasse
see menu

Sunday brunch in Lychenerstrasse(this is where I lived) or Kruezberg at oranienstrasse/Paul-Linke Ufer oder Maybachufer

Also, there are loads of cheap places near Kreuzberg 36 - near Oranienstrasse which are around 5 euros for a main dish
and Kreuzberg Bergmanstrasse also offers a wide range of cuisines around 10 euros or less.

Don;t forget to check out
Spätzle express : what is spätzle??

**Lazy Caribbean bar
the YAAM - really nice in sunny days

**Drink as much as you want and then pay as much as you want wine bar
Weinerei - all near Zionskirche
even the new york times loved it

Club
Berghain: techono electornic, but the whole idea is to go there, since it's supposed to be this amazing place which opens around 00:00~ 15:00 ... peak is around 4am.

also lots of night life around Warschauerstrasse

but buy a Zitty(events etc guide for Berlin) and see what is happening.
or go to www.zitty.de

but most of all have fun and stay around in the East side...

my first barbie

2010-08-02T15:21:00.002+02:00

This was my first barbie, that I got when I was in elementary school, from my best friend Leigh. Actually that was my only barbie, since I didn't get another one due to that I had one. Oh what fun we had with her, making clothes for her, and also shooting movies, which included borderlinish soft porn - harlequin romance novel types mind you! (we didn't have ken, so it ended up taking some interesting turns....)

awww good times.

One liners

2010-07-27T12:25:00.002+02:00

hi there.
Since it has been forever since I've posted my last entries, here is something to say.. hey this blog has not been abandoned.

Some one liners i've written in the previous months, travelling.

"You can always blame your parents for everything wrong about yourself, including the lack of respect for one's parents" - in Seoul, May 2010.

"I often wish that the cute guy I meet in an off occassion is gay.... This is how much I love my husband" - after meeting the ultra cute steward on an AirFrance flight to Nantes, June, 2010

"There is no perfect man... there is just that normal guy that comes long in your life, after a series of terrible men, who make him seem perfect in comparison" - thoughts I had right before getting married....

Starved for Attention

2010-07-27T11:49:00.004+02:00

"An estimated 195 million children worldwide suffer from the effects of malnutrition, with 90 percent living in sub-Saharan Africa and South Asia. In fact, malnutrition contributes to at least one-third of the eight million annual deaths of children under five years of age.Many families simply cannot afford to provide nutritious food—particularly animal source foods such as milk, meat, and eggs—that their young children need to grow and thrive. Instead, they struggle to survive—far from the media spotlight—on a diet of little more than cereal porridges of maize or rice, amounting to the equivalent of bread and water."
This video shows how much of this problem is to be accounted for by the food aid systems currently in place, which is linked to the goal of sustaining the american corn industry. (see also last entry - from Food Inc, concerning how the american corn farming has changed the way people eat, and how it is one cause of obesity and malnourishment of Americans)

Just to answer some of the questions listed in the last part - the reasons why the US is providing corn meals to malnourished African children as food, when it simply does not provide the necessary vitamins and nourishment are simple.

No world aid is given without political and economical reasons from the provider. in this case, the US government provide aid to indirectly supply government support to their (massive) corn-farm industry and other industries surrounding it. In addition, it also acts as a pacifiers to third worlds which encourages dependence on aid/foreign(us-owned) products, and provides obstacles in developing a self-sustaining economy. Overall, the foremost purpose of the aid is NOT in providing nutritious food to children in the third world, thus the double standard and the bad quality of food provided.

Join the petition

hours of the week

2010-06-02T12:38:00.003+02:00

I haven't been writing much... because I have been busy with several different things.
I will write more about what exactly they were later, but for today, I want to share this idea of how exactly our time is spent.

Okay now let's calculate 24*7=148 hours a week. everyone has that much hours.

Let's take the big chunks out first.
8*7=56 hours of sleep a week
5*8=40 (officially) hours of work a week
=======
which totals up to .. = 96
that only leaves us about 52 hours

on top of that I need approximately 10 hours a week to commute time each week (half of which also can be considered my new paper reading time)
and average 1 hour each day to clean myself, and get dressed, and defecate etc. that is 7
and on average 2.5 hours a day to prepare, cook, eat food and clean up afterwards. that is 17.5 hours.. let's round it up to 18.
and I will do approximately 7 hours a week of household errands ( that is shopping for food, etc., cleaning the house, laundry and other household tasks).
that is total = 42 hours

that leaves 10 hours.

that is all the free time I have (officially) to spend to do whatever I want.

If I need to keep in shape I should to atleast 2 hours of exercise each week but 1 hour to prepare etc. thus that leaves 7.

in those 7 hours, I need to get leisure, relax and fulfil my inner self.
how does anyone manage to do this????

(this post was initially written on the 2nd of June, 2010)

Food Inc

2010-04-14T14:26:00.002+02:00

This is a must see movie, which is a investigative documentary concerning the food industry. What I really like about this movie is that it doesn't stop at showing the viewers how food is produced, and how it is consumed but why this is the case. How the various national policies, and corporate lobbyist has changed what people eat, how it is made etc.

Gordon Brown and Labour Party goes for the offense.

2010-04-01T14:33:00.006+02:00

and other posters

An article in today's Guardian reports that the British labour party is now going for the offense strategy for their election campaign, putting Gordon Brown as the alpha male character.

" Labour was "going all in", staking the election on the hope that voters will be drawn to an alpha-male personality who "is prepared to pummel, punch or even headbutt the British economy into a new era of jobs and prosperity"."

" Labour further hopes to "harness the power of internet folksourcing", the aide explained, encouraging supporters to design their own posters, which could then be showcased online. The "design your own poster" initiative has caught the imagination of Downing Street strategists, the aide said, because it is cheap, fosters engagement among voters and, above all, nothing could possibly go wrong with it."

Capitalism and greed

2010-03-27T22:13:00.003+01:00

I know many point to morality failures as one of the key reasons for the financial crisis that was felt across the world. Some were so convinced that they argue that financial stock brokers/bankers should take an oath before starting trading, just as they do in the medical field (hippocratic oath). However, I believe as many others do, that this is not a moral issue. This is/was not something that could've been solved by moralities. Rather it is a structural issue, where the system drives individuals to act a certain way. Capitalism, by definition puts market values and accumulation of capital as it's foremost important value.
This documentary/tv show puts it also in a very clear view.

However, let me iterate my views further.
Free market economist also believe that if you let market loose, than everything will find equilibrium. In these cases, morality does not have a place. A bit simpler, banks accumulated and made money due to that that is something they could do in the current system. Although some criticize for it being immoral due to that there were very high risks involved and much of the money was made was done where it was not due, let's think about it again. In the financial sector, much like other sectors but more so, the biggest goal is to achieve financial gains. The more you gain, the better. Although some may be in the boundaries of being illegal, if that is still within the rules of the game, you do it. As noted in the documentary, others are doing it, the pressures to follow would be large, especially when born/raised in a country where competition is thought to provide the best results, and falling back is only a characteristics of a looser- in all aspects of the words.
I even see this in academia, where our drug of preference is academic publications. No longer is it that development and spread of knowledge our goal. No, our goal is to write publications, regardless of any moral misdeed this may contain, and I've seen one too many academics even throw their health away to be on top of the game. But, again, can we blame this on morals? No.. I also believe it goes way beyond that. It has more to do with the high of competition. I think many of the bankers who have done " immoral" banking had enough? money in their hands. But to be perceived as the best, they needed the extra. Although the money didn't hurt.

and this all comes about, due to that we loose conscious of what we are doing, exactly what the consequences of our choices made and why we are behaving a certain way. Which leads me to this book Momo: on which I want to write another entry. Although I must say, to be conscious of everything, would be painful in many ways, or would lead us to believing the best we can do is to go rot in some dirt. I mean there is a golden middle, and many of us, not through our own choices, have been lead/ are in a position where we are actually asleep.

Dads

2010-03-26T17:24:00.001+01:00

"So you have a couple of drinks, fight about politics... and then you take it personally when he doesn't agree with you... that is called having a dad."

- Liz Lemmon, from 30 Rock