The following are duties, situations, events and adventures which may explain my sudden outbursts or changes in moods to my family. At the very least, they may help to outline areas that need tweaking. At best, someone will begin a prayer group on my behalf, start a fast or call a solemn assembly.

• Refereeing:  Refereeing between my five-year-old daughter and two-year-old grandson is exhausting. Sophie is convinced that Gavin’s compliance with her bossing goes with the territory of being an aunt regardless of age. Refereeing between my 19 year old and five-year-old is equally exhausting. Sophie also thinks she holds the power to ground Courtney. Sometimes I’m tempted to surrender authority to her and walk away.
• The potty:  Trying to encourage Gavin’s interest while discouraging Oliver’s is challenging. While we did have success with Gavin today, Oliver nearly nose-dived for a swim. EWE and SCARY!
• Diapers and Pull-up changes:  There’s no other way to say it. Poop. Sometimes I feel like it’s all I deal with. I’m still thinking that Eat, Poop, Cry might be an idea for a book. On one particular day I changed seven poop diapers on ONE kid. Grabbing the wrong diaper and/or Pull-up is not the only concern. I’ve been known to send a wet diaper home in the dirty jammies’ bag. Souvenir?
• The pacifiers:  The dentist sent word for Mommy about her concerns over Gavin’s pacifier use—how it has already affected his bite and could affect his jaw alignment should he continue to use it. Mom decided we would start weaning him right away using the method that many {including the dentist} have suggested, used and had success—snipping the end. While he is holding it in his hand the majority of the time, he has yet to fully surrender it. “I broke nu-nu, Nanny,” he’s told me 254 times. Oliver has used the hospital pacifiers until now. He recently started biting them and nearly ripping them in half. SCARY!  He is now using {today is the first time at my house} the same Nuk style that Gavin uses. He’s about as thrilled with this as Gavin is with his snipped nu-nus and for the most part holds it in his hand. I can see this going one of two ways: they both wean quickly and HOORAH for everyone! Or they hang on to them and Gavin tries to claim Oliver’s fully in tact nu-nus to replace his mutant ones. And then nap time takes a turn for the worse.
• HELP ME!
• Nap time:  After years of sitting various and sundry {I like repetition. Except changing diapers.} children and mastering the craft of syncing nap time I am stuck in a cycle of ever changing naps. There’s only TWO of them. Yet at times it takes nothing short of a miracle to succeed. Nap time is not just a long lunch break for a Nanny. It is LIFE SUPPORT, people. Going without it is equivalent to a smoker going all day without a smoke break. Yes, I can say this in spite of the fact that I’ve never been a smoker. I live with one.
• Separation anxiety:  I’m having a lot of anxiety over my separation from adults and extended time with small children. Just kidding. Oliver has struggled with this for a while now. It happens with both his mom and me. In spite of the fact that he’s been in the presence of my older daughters, my parents and various friends, he falls completely apart if they are here and they attempt to pick him up, walk anywhere near him, speak to him or if I walk out of the room. Although it’s baby steps, he’s made some improvement with Courtney and has now let her pick him up on TWO occasions. There’s been a time or two when I’ve been tempted to join his outbursts, crawl in a corner and suck my thumb.
• Eating: someone is ALWAYS asking for something to eat or drink. This is not limited to the two toddler boys. What is the record for the most times a kitchen has been cleaned in a day? I can probably beat it. Before you suggest I not allow sporadic eating you should know that this is not necessarily the case. There is a college student who is in and out between school and work at various {I truly must love this word.} times. There’s also a Kindergartner, an older daughter dropping off and picking up the grandson and OH YEA! The toddlers. I may or may not have fed one kid twice and skipped feeding another by mistake. Hypothetically speaking.
• Massage therapy:  I need it. Gavin clearly packs lead in his Pull-Ups. Traipsing across a parking lot to the dentist office located in a Physician’s tower while packing him and trying my hardest to hold Sophie’s hand and keep my purse and Gavin’s bag on my shoulder deserves a medal of some kind. Don’t even mention the umbrella stroller. Gone are those days. Listen, the kid can nearly pick up the Nanny. He’s strong and smart enough to escape the so-called buckles of an umbrella stroller. It’s a challenge to keep him from unbuckling his car seat while driving.
• Temper tantrums:  I’m down to once a week, sometimes week and a half. Gavin’s, however, are sporadic {sometimes several daily or none at all} and can happen when least expected at which time my years of effective parenting and Nanny-sitting the nieces, nephews and multitudes are right out the window. I’ve managed so far to remain calm {while in public, at least} and either attempt to pick him up and carry him away from the crowd to talk firmly to him without the eavesdropping of the onlookers. OR, If that doesn’t work I’ve been known to say loudly that, “we are TAKING HIM TO HIS MAMA!” As in, “I’m NOT the mama,” onlookers! {Proud Grandmother!} Oliver’s tantrums are less extreme. So far, I’ve managed to keep in a specific spot like a time out or I resort to putting him in his pack-in-play. Sometimes I call him Tommy Pickles. *grins* Seriously, I’d prefer to not resort to the confines of his pack-in-play as a means of discipline but sometimes a Nanny has to do what a Nanny has to do.

Hope you have a better day today.

I love you.

Peace out

Love Joe

Several weeks ago he started leaving them for me. It hasn’t cost him one cent. He’s used the letterhead notebooks he had stuffed in my stocking this past Christmas that he’d received from a customer. Underneath Upholstery Limited, LLC and its contact info he scrawls his love. Surprisingly, they’re never the same. Sometimes he includes Scripture. Always, his love.

It’s not that he’s never written a note to me before. He’s always carefully handpicked greeting cards. But through the years the love notes tend to fade away. The consistently written notes of late couldn’t have come at a more perfect time.

Our marriage hasn’t been immune to difficulty. No marriage is. But we’d hit a rocky place. Rocks in uncharted waters forced us to dig deep. And I’m forever grateful for those rocks. In the most difficult of places you can find an intimacy rare. Romantic newlyweds cannot know it. It requires a clinging together as if you’re holding on for your very life.

In the Christian walk, when we encounter difficulties we’re given the opportunity to walk our talk. And why is it that after years of learning the Scriptures and quoting them to others so quickly we find ourselves taken back when reality hits and we must walk those Scriptures out? We’ve been given the instruction manual yet we refuse to use it. And around the mountain we go, wandering in the wilderness like the children of Israel.

But what happens when we become doers of the Word? When we let the Lover of our souls draw us close during those times of struggle? When we cling to Him in desperation knowing that we need Him more than the very air we breathe we find intimacy more beautiful than any artist could paint, than the most romantic lover could portray.

We’re given the perfect picture of marriage through Christ and His love for His Church. His love letters keep us breathing, keep us alive. And this is what a man does for His wife when he pours out his love with ink. It doesn’t have to be ink. It could be in the ways he knows her spilling out into her cup of coffee just the way she likes it. It doesn’t have to be the price of a dozen red roses. Just his time.

Husbands, what she’s really crying out for is a simple act of love. An intentional act of letting her know you see her, you hear her, you love her. And it could be written down on a scrap of paper. Because, really, is there a better way to let her know?

I’ve kept the letters I’ve received over the past few weeks. I’ll cherish them forever. They’re building a stronger marriage. They’re stepping stones, a mosaic of unity and intimacy. It’s a two way street, I well know. Give and take. Not at all 50 – 50 as Ann Says. It’s an intentional giving when it’s needed, not necessarily when deserved.

And men, I’ll let you in on a little secret: it’s worth the payoff!

So here’s a suggestion for this Valentine’s Day. DaySpring has a collection of Mr. & Mrs. gifts including this Two in One Inspirational Journal:

This had our names on it!!! Well, really, it does. Mr. & Mrs. 

But you can start today. Even if it’s written on an Upholstery Limited, LLC notepad, your words can be just the thing that sparks a dying flame in your marriage. Even if they’re corny.

Especially if they’re corny.

If we want better marriages it’s time we follow the instructions written in the greatest Love Letter of all times. And isn’t that the best way to love—to write our love letter down?

Love is always hard because dying to self is, but I want to do it—because I want you.

We don’t have to try to arrive anywhere or climb anything or try to figure out how to make it—

Just make our lives a living sacrifice and let the days makes us like gold, to arrive before His throne.

~ Ann Voskamp

**I’ve received no compensation for my shout out to Day Spring for their amazing Valentine’s gifts. But I certainly wouldn’t refuse them.

This is Ginger, Rena’s little sister, dropping in with a way cool message for you. Have you noticed anything different on the blog lately? Look closer. Anything? How about the message in a bottle button located at the bottom of the page? I am sure you know what that’s for, right? I mean really. How long did it take us??

For those of you who do not prefer RSS, you can now subscribe to Insert Grace Here.com via email. Yes. I know. Overwhelming. Just click the button below, brought to you by my wonderful husband—our blog designer. Or, if you’d like, here’s a list of all the different ways to keep in touch with us.

• Subscribe via Email
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What could be better than having my sister’s witty banter delivered to your inbox? Doing any of the above, of course. Hope to see you pinning soon . . . 

Dear Brandon,

For your birthday, the Joedaddy and I would like to take the time to share a few things with you. {You can hardly contain the excitement, right?}

Buckle up, you’re going for a ride!!! Just kidding.

Although it is not commonly practiced today even among Christians, when seeking courtship with a young woman, a gentleman or “suitor” would ask the permission and seek the advice of the young woman’s father. While we certainly don’t want to imply the level of seriousness of your relationship, we do want you to know that in the short time that we’ve come to know you, you’ve gained the trust of the Joedaddy. This is not given freely.

So, Happy Birthday! Go on and celebrate!!

Seriously. . .

Your parents have done well and should be proud. What we’ve observed foremost about you is your determination to seek the heart of God. Nothing is more important. It is apparent that you will not settle for less than God’s best. Maintaining a 4.0 grade point average in college while working does not come easy for a young man. {Not that I would know firsthand. I mean, I’m not even a man.}

As a parent, I want nothing less than God’s best for my girls. This requires a dedication and determination that many Christians lack today. I’m grateful for your drive to succeed and I pray you’ll never settle. But before your head explodes, I’ll add that we’ve also had the opportunity to learn a little about your weaknesses. And that’s not such a bad thing. Time reveals these things in all relationships. I’ve taught the girls to know their weaknesses because we can be certain the enemy knows them. It’s apparent that you are well aware of yours and for that, I am so grateful. And I should probably add that we are also well aware that you’ve learned one or four of Courtney’s. You don’t have to answer that. Just a little observation. {wink}

You should also know that I’ve taught Courtney to watch how a man treats his mother. A lot can be said for that. So just so you know—she’s watching. And I think you’re safe there. You’d better be.

We want to thank you for taking the time to get to know us, for playing Apples to Apples with us in spite of Courtney’s poor sportsmanship and for paying extra attention to Sophie. It’s been our pleasure. It truly has.

Now. . .

having said that, I’d like to remind you that Courtney is of utmost importance to us. If you hurt her in any way, Joedaddy will cut you.

I’m just kidding.

Well, only a little.

I pray this year is your very best yet and that you grow richly in Christ. Our expectations lie only within His plans for both of you.

Happy Birthday!!!

We love you,

the Joedaddy and Mrs. Rena

P.S.

I’ve considered doing a blog series on “Courting Courtney.” It has a certain ring to it, doesn’t it? So if you happen to notice cameras or the taking of notes, just carry on, as you were. . .

There under to today’s date I find the words recorded from two anonymous listeners who longed for Manna from Heaven to share with this world of hurting people. Under the title—The Way of Happiness:

COMPLETE surrender of every moment to God is the foundation of happiness, the superstructure is the joy of Communion with Him.

COMPLETE surrender of every moment to God . . . I can’t help but think of Ann. I’m still stumbling my way through it but it is the most simple yet profound thing I’ve learned over the past year.

The giving of thanks is beyond necessary. It is crucial to the very quality of our lives. And that’s what surrender is all about. It’s the realization that we just cannot control the moments but we can trust the One who does. And the giving of the thanks in the midst of the moment is the sure sign that we’ve surrendered.

It’s tried and true. I’m slow to learn but even in the not surrendering or giving thanks the lesson is crystal clear.

Determined, I will march on and look for grace and continue thanking Him.

Thank you for . . .

• letting it go at the altar
• unpaid bills
• messy stacks of papers
• achy muscles
• fussy kids
• quiet moments in the midst of the chaos
• those who continue to point the way to Him

In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. ~ 1 Thessalonians 5:18 ~