inspired to take action

How to ask her out

2010-11-01T00:55:00.000-07:00

Did you know that it is actually easier to ask a good looking girl out? Most big boys out there tend to make things completed. You don't have to practice a speech or get your head swirling about what to say or not to say.

Today morning I was traveling with a friend of mine in a taxi. She started explaining how she doesn't like small talks. I asked why. She said, "you guys sometimes act like jerks. You don't even know what to say to us and the best thing you can do is find small short talk that annoys." Well, I can attribute most of that attitude to her personality. She likes engaging dialogue. To get a good grasp of what she meant, I asked again, "So, what kind of smooth talk is acceptable to a good looking girl of your type?". She turned and looked at me with an easier face. Word!

She made to say, "A guy says something like, 'I know you have heard this many times but i still want to say you look really cute' or beautiful, or nice or very cool. Apparently babes," she continues, "babes like nice words. It turns their attention even if it is little attention. Then your good looking girl will say, 'Thanks', in a nice way. Then you continue to say something like, 'by the way I am Daniel, nice to meet you ...' And she will reply the expected. You continue with, 'So, do you have a boyfriend or what? I am jealous already'. Obviously that sounds nice too and welcome. It means you are interested in her, and you are also implying that she is attractive too. She will probably say something like, 'No', and quickly add, 'I am not interested in guys. I am fine by myself'. It doesn't matter if she has or doesn't have. All you need is to make sure you have her number and ask her out. Most girls with boyfriends will be tempted to say no. They love outings mostly and that is no offense in anyway. Someone once said, outings with other people are fun even when you are married! That is practically true. Meeting new people and spending a little time talking and chatting is one way the Universe keeps in harmony.

So you say something like, 'I would love to go out with you sometime. I am sure you don't mind, do you?' If she is a free-spirited girl, she wont turn you down. She will say something like, 'No, I don't mind'. Not to be the jerk, the next step is to get her number by asking her nicely. 'Can I please have your number?' or 'Do you mind if i get your number?' would be appropriate"

She paused and looked at me. Then she quickly said, "I will usually say something like, I will give you my number but wont take yours... I will get it when you call"

Amazing, isn't it? No one says you have to follow what I have written up there and no one says things will go smooth and easy like that. The point is, approaching a good looking girl should not be something next to impossible. And no one says whoever you talk to will give you her number or agree to your outings or charms. And that's not offensive either. Some girls have their own satisfactions, their own lives and their own proggie... For example, she may be honest and say, 'Sorry, I am engaged' or, 'Sorry, I don't give out my number to strangers!' or, 'I am really busy, I can't go out any soon'... Whatever excuse or turn-down you receive, don't take it so personal. Take NO as good as YES. Some people who fear rejection never really take their ass off the ground. NO is not rejection in its deepest sense. And by deepest sense i mean, NO is another way of saying, today your luck with me is off, you can try someone else or try me another time. By this time, someone turning you down even to be your girlfriend or mate is not something you should gross over. It is something that you should take lightly and move on. Move on. Mooooove onnnn! Period.

There is what we call Behavioral Psychology! Ok, I wont go there for now. I meant to say that people behave differently under different circumstances. She may say No to you, and say Yes to another on the same day. Well, it could be that you made an impression of a real jerk or it could be that you are probably not her type. Or it could be that she is not your type. Seriously, do you think that just because someone is cute means she is your type? Or do you think you will always find someone who opens up that easily and gives every Tim, Tom and Tedd a chance to go out, and date and pretend they don't have a boyfriend even when they do, or is it that they just love outings with whoever at any time of the year? You see, you might even go out and destroy your reputation that you built. Suddenly you don't know what to talk about. Suddenly you land into an ex who gives you a hug and makes your new fish get a turn off. Suddenly her boyfriend shows up in the same place! Suddenly, there is a brawl or fire or a damn thief-bag-snatcher! Not to worry though, don't be a pessimist.

If things will go wrong, they probably will. Just don't be the cause either in your thoughts or deeds. Certainly you may NOW go today or tomorrow and ask that sweet babe out. Go ask them if they got a second and find a way of saying it lest it cause a tumor in your brain. Words are full of power. It depends on how you organise them to construct a sentence. If you have watched a TV show called Burn Notice, you see how Micheal Western (Jeffrey Donovan) gets to the enemy. He behaves like them to get to them. He establishes rapport(by far the most effective tool), knows which words to say and how to act, and how to make them believe what he wants them believe. Moreover, he is tactical and very good. Real good. That is how we get to connect with the cutie. What does she like, what kind of words do she use (her diction), what makes her happy, what are her interests, and what does she do when she is with friends... Usually, this works best if its a build up on Chemistry between the two of you. I bet you understand what the law of attractive says.

For all its worth, never let the looks intimidate you or make your heart-beats triple. It's as easy as finding a way to say the first word and be the Micheal Western. Get them to say yes, and get them to discover what a world of likes you have in common. The imagination comes to, "It could be fun hanging out more and more and more...."

How to break or form a habit

2010-10-28T07:45:00.000-07:00

From almost everyone's experience, habits are habits. They are so hard to form later on break. If you are the kind of person that opts to use positive thinking or affirmations or your entire willpower, a habit wont form or just go away just like that. I have done that and failed myself and i know that i have a strong will-power. More often you will find yourself dropping back slowly by slowly.

Lets say for example, you like talking a lot. Believe me some people are really talkative to the extent that they will talk and talk and talk, and just talk and talk some more. If you ask them about, say, the current job of an ex-boyfriend, they will talk and probably tell you where the guy is, who he is dating, the schools he went to, the bad things he did, the kind of loser he is, and so on and so on... Talkers seem to just talk and talk and have all the crap to tell you (If you have never landed on one, pray you don't). Well, how do you break out of a habit like that? If you depend on your will power, you will probably succeed in the first few attempts. But trust me, this wont last for long.

Someone will ask you about your friend's family background and well, you might find yourself drifting to the relatives as well and probably your will-power will remind you to stop. This may happen for some time and you actually succeed though it wont last. So what's the real way to break a habit like that?

30 day breaking!
Its been preached widely mostly by inspirational speakers or motivators, and is a proven method for forming or breaking a habit (good or bad). Take 30 days to monitor yourself. If it's talking too much, pinch yourself before you start. Say a few words to satisfy someone's inquiry and do not assume that they expect more. If they do, let them ask more, if they don't ask, don't offer. If it is eating too many times a day that cause you to be fat, then don't store food or search for it during the day. Replace it with water or just some yogurt. If you want to get athletic, make sure you do some jogging, some gym and whatever else you want to do to achieve. Do it for 30 days constant. Constant means contact by the way, not most of the times or some...

If you want to start meditation, set time apart and do it constantly. If you are fat and want to reduce weight, draw a plan and follow through for 30 days. Some say 21 days will do just fine but don't do 21 days. Do 30 days straight...

More often than not, it is sometimes irritating having to follow through to form or break a certain habit. The reminder of committing to something every single day constantly is boring to most people and they just give up. However, keep in mind what you want to break or form and whether it is important to you or not. Don't just waste time by trying out something even when you don't want to follow through. Most things in life take discipline, and you might want to take sometime off to think about discipline and take another step of self mastery and growth. That's what makes the difference between winners and losers, the wealthy and the poor, the weak and the strong...

In a period of one year, you can sit down and decide certain things you want to change about you for the better. It might be being more caring about your workmates, or improving the quality of your job, or learning to read inspiration or important books, or shading off that fat, or keeping in touch with your family, or cutting on drinking alcohol, or swimming, or singing, or dancing, or writing a book, or making friends or just starting a relationship for the better intentions. Whatever it is, you can make it! Yes you can!!! The longest journeys begin with just one step. You don't have to do it all in one go and no one expects you to anyway. It's your life. If you take time to notice our mother nature, you will find all the beauty in patience and discipline, borrow a leaf.

For now, go start something that will propel you to greater heights. If you are confused about what to form or break, begin with this simple act of forming a habit. Take sometime off before you sleep. Turn off the music, the TV, the phone and have some quiet moment by yourself. Like in 30 minutes or so, breathe in deeply several times and relax. Just relax and be calm. Take your mind off everything and say something like: "I am grateful to be alive! I am peace, i am love, i am joy. The world is on my side every single moment and i shall not despair. Amen." You can then allow your muscles to relax one by one until you completely feel calm and peaceful. Those are simple words and actions but they carry a sense of oneness and peace.

And for now, i am always wishing you the very best that life has to offer. Let it be according to your desires to form or break the habits in your life...

Go For It!

2009-11-24T05:20:00.000-08:00

Run towards your fears
Embrace them
Then go for your mistakes
Run towards them
and tell them you are fearless
Pave your way while you still can
There is no tomorrow without now
Now is the time to act fearlessly
Take the risks
Don't wait for the sign to appear
Look deep inside your heart
It is there beckoning
Jump, take the leap and go for it
Keep on being positive
Remember what you think is what you become
Keep on dreaming
Whatever the dreams may be
Feel the dream, live the dream
Walk towards the dream.
Have the faith. Gather the courage
If you believe it then you can achieve it
And you will inspire others
Do something today that will draw you closer
To whatever you want to be in life

Passion versus Affirmations

2009-11-13T00:39:00.000-08:00

Affirmations are a great way to reprogram your subconscious mind. But should affirmations be used contrary to your passion? In one way or another you just can’t use affirmations in everything. I mean, if for example you are not a talented guitar player, and you don’t enjoy it much either, should you proceed and use affirmations to let your brain know that you can play a guitar better than anyone else? Will this change your attitude and passion towards playing a guitar?
For one, passion is passion. We all have passion that drives us. That is probably the best explanation for why we do certain things easier and much better than anyone else can while maintaining the same spirit and energy. Like Joy explains in her post, we should concentrate on things we do well, things we know we have passion for as we delegate others to do what they are good at. There is probably no alternate route to this. If we force ourselves to do things we don’t have passion for/in, we end up frustrated, dissatisfied, and sometimes we are not sure whether the results are the expected ones. What’s more, the person who does that same chore/job with the innate passion will always produce better results! Of course we all feel out classed when someone does the same job we tried better than us. And deep inside, we tell ourselves that if it were in such and such a field we would have done the best!
Still coming to passion and affirmations, it’s better to stick to things we naturally have passion for. Apply the affirmation in those areas! Each one of us has a motive why we would go through affirmations to be what we want to be! Usually it is because we believe that that’s where we belong. We want to be identified with the results as part of who we are. If for instance you want to stop smoking and are in the habit of affirming to yourself that the habit/act of smoking doesn't identify with who you truly are. Then you strongly believe that you are smarter than being a smoker.
So if you are to use affirmations effectively, don’t bump into reprogramming yourself to be what you don’t identify with, with a passion! If you don’t like fish for instance, don’t get caught in the habit of telling your subconscious mind that fish is the best. Just because everyone else says so doesn't mean it should be the best for you as well. That reminds me of giving in to external stimuli which inadvertently takes away our power to be what we want to be. We ought to keep independence deep in our own to be what we want to be and not what they want us to be. If you strive to live up to expectations of the external stimuli, you are working from a low end potential to a high end potential. This is contrary to what Bob Proctor says in “You were born rich”. Bob Proctor says that we should work from a high end to a low end potential. That is to say, Thoughts (Spirit) to Idea (Intellectual) then to Thing (Physical), instead of Thing to Idea then to Thoughts!

The Creation Principle!
You can ask yourself why Bob Proctor would insist on such a thing! But guess what, he is right! I strongly believe that is the order of creation! And here is proof. First you think. Thought is the highest order of creation since the mind is starting point. Then you get the idea! Ideas are an intellectual visualization of your thought! Then you create or bring into existence! The physical plane. God himself did not first see light to create light. He said let there be light, and there was light. And he saw that light was good. Then on the 5th day, he said let us create man in our own image, let us create the expanse between the sky and the land and so forth! Though, Idea, Thing! From High Potential to Low Potential. It thus follows that man is not just like God, but a god himself! Psalms 82:6. He was made in his own image and thus should follow principles of creation in order to one with the Universe. If you are working from Thing to Thought, you have a big problem.

Thing to Thought!
I want to describe Thing as external stimuli. If you are an investor intending looking for opportunity, you don’t first look at inflation rates, economic stability, taxation and other policies in the countries. No. You first determine that you want to invest. You also establish what it is that you want to invest. Then you can look for where to invest as you consider different aspects as mentioned above, i.e. tax policies and the like. If you look at the these external factors, what kind of response do you get? Usually not so impressive. And this brings low energy/momentum and you can hardly come up with the kind of investment plans you would naturally have.

Why?
When we work from a high end potential, we get the required feeling and potential/momentum. This determines how much action we put into the process of bringing our ideas into physical existence! A high passionate feeling gives birth to high energy of action which leads to the kind of results initially anticipated!

However, working from a low end to a high end gives us a low-to-medium level of feeling! Or sometimes we don’t get the right kind of feeling that should match our actions. Generally speaking, this approach should not be used to visualize or hope to get where we want to be. But this is probably also one of the most used approaches in our world today especially when it comes to relationships. We want to first see, then determine instead of establishing the kind of person we want to meet first before meeting the match. Steve Pavlina clearly says that we should first make our intentions. You don’t have to first the million dollars before making the intention! We have to do things the way the Universe works. You don’t need to have your accounts filled with millions of dollars to know that you are rich. No! You were born rich. You first believe it in mind. The bible says let it be according to your faith! What matters is what you believe about yourself. You have the unlimited power to be what you want to be (according to your mind’s thoughts!) It doesn't matter whether you believe this or not. That’s the principle power from the omniscient, the omnipotent and omnipresent! The one source of Universal power from which we draw our source of power!

Whose Responsibility is your life?

2009-11-06T23:53:00.000-08:00

I am responsible for my life
I am responsible for my future
The decisions I make, the choices I make
I must accept their results

No one has power over what I can be
Only I can be whatever I want to be

My future is in my hands
The origin is in what goes on in my mind
And what I determine to think about most
That that I hold on to without wavering

My happiness does not depend on anyone else
It depends on my choice to be or not to be

My hope and faith do not depend on the external world
They depend on what I choose in my world within
And I determine that that I put my faith and hope in

My thoughts are the creators of my life
And I accept the power of my thoughts
I accept that I determine and choose these thoughts carefully
On every single day that passes by
I must make my life better and better

Until I reach where I want to be in life

My life is my responsibility
And I am grateful for responsibility over my life

What the Divorce means to some conscious beings

2009-10-28T23:09:00.000-07:00

Okay, I am a fan of the Pavlina’s, and the reason is not different from what any fan may expect. The Pavlina’s especially Steve has driven the self conscious growth development in many individuals of whom I am among the most grateful.

I read a lot of Steve’s blogs from his website, StevePavlina.com, and I like his topics, his original ideas, his authentic thoughts, the audio (especially those great mp3s). These are tools that have guided many of us to self realization and a rather stupendous evolution of personal growth and development. Meanwhile I have not been to most of Steve’s Conscious Growth Workshops (CGW) for reasons of distance. I lie in the heart of Africa without much luxury for flights and so forth. But the internet keeps me connected to the blogs and facebook rather instantly just like the rest of you. But I hope to be there in person one day. Now, let me talk about the divorce.

As you might suspect, I am not an attacker of the divorce. I am voicing an inner thought that may kindle disparate patterns of thought in different people. First of all, when I first listened to Steve’s thoughts on religion, I didn’t want to finish the recording and I didn’t. You may call it a self-fulfilling prophecy for now. But that's not the point. Religion is a definitive subject sensitive to most human kind who believe that there is a greater, indescribable part of their life that depends on, for example the hope of life after death, inner peace and comfort, spiritual guidance (in general spirituality) and many other things I can't delve into right now. And you may ask, ‘what are you talking about? what does this have to do with divorce? Or family? Or what are you driving to? Or are you another creature searching for identity?

Well, that brings me to this. Is it okay to have a divorce (on friendly acceptable terms!). I have asked myself the question after reading and re-reading the post. I am an ardent Christian and my belief system - which by the way i prefer not to have it fall among the flexible belief systems - guides me to believe that marriage is a lifetime institution. Divorce is not okay except for failure of marital duties! That's scriptural and godly. But i still ask.

Is it okay for me to wake up one day and table the situation to my grand partner that we should call it quits and see where it goes? Okay let me change the perspective as Steve has taught me to look at problems from multiple perspectives. How does a muslin look at divorce? Oh, i cant tell. How does God look at a Divorce stemming from two people consenting to call it quits. I presuppose 'no way'. But i don't want to be judgmental here. How do Steve's parents look at his marriage's conscious actions? 'May be not yet understanding what it actually is'.

I am still imagining, looking through the mirror, wanting to consent, wanting to stand in front of Erin Pavlina, and just keep quiet. Look at her, greet her may be, and ask her about the power of a woman. And say something like, 'i thought the completeness was found in the man of your life? Is it also in your independence?' May be go a little bit further and ask more about whether her psychic abilities accept the concentration of losing a husband based on a mutual understanding! And for Steve, my friend, if I were to meet you, i would love to ask you about the little silence that fills your big house. The roaming whispers of invisible Erin opening the kitchen door! Never mind, i cant tell how it feels. But God gave us imaginations, and that's how we silently enter into worlds not our own, then get away without being noticed.

Steve and Erin Pavlina, we still love you. Steve prefers that we don't take sides and that's why I am patting on both shoulders asking, how does it feel? Can you do me a favor and join the big house. It still has the invisible charms of 15 years. You shouldn't let that go away. You should never have agreed to start the discussion. Happiness and individual goals cannot be the cause. They should not send the kids to their mum alone. The kids love to see you hugging and talking and loving in a home. It makes sense to them. Do it for you. Do it for the kids. Run, and join in the big house Erin. That's where the warmth is. Please do it because we are all behind you.

Grateful.28.10.2009

2009-10-28T09:44:00.000-07:00

I am so grateful for the healing of my left foot.
I am so grateful that the universe is working in my favour to make me rich.
I am so thankful for the weather
I am so thankful to God for my Girlfriend. love her mob time
I am so thankful for all that i am.

Grateful.26.10.2009

2009-10-26T08:18:00.000-07:00

Dear God,
Thanks for creating me a man. I love being a man. It feels so good to be created in your image.
Thanks again for giving the good health that i have enjoyed and will still enjoy. For over two years, i have not tasted a tablet! God you are so great and the devil is mad and losing. Whoooooaaah! God you are so great. I love you Lord.
In Jesus' name, Amen

Grateful.23.10.2009

2009-10-23T05:50:00.000-07:00

So grateful for today. Life is good. Its so beautiful
I am grateful for the dreams i have, their creation and fulfilment.
I am grateful that i am strong and full of energy
I am grateful that i got resources that have helped me grow up intellectually and spiritually
This week has been among the greatest weeks that i will always be grateful for.
Lastly, i am grateful that i breathe fresh air. AMEN!

Grateful.Thursday 22.10.2009

2009-10-22T00:48:00.000-07:00

I am grateful for this very day. Its beautiful. Temperatures are fine, there is a calmness ambience in the office, and everything seems so natural and calm
I am grateful that i have what to put on and eat. I am not in dire need
I am grateful for all people who inspire me every single day of my life
I am grateful that God cares about me and that his grace and righteousness does not depend on my physical acts or my Dos and Donts.
I am grateful that i am physically healthy and happy
Thanks and honor to the master of the Universe.

Grateful. Wed. 21st Oct 2009

2009-10-21T02:31:00.000-07:00

I am grateful for today
I am grateful for having a great day at work
I am grateful that i am not living a desperate life
I am grateful that i have lots of skills
I am grateful to you God for creating me in such a genius way
Thank you GOD!

Grateful. Tuesday 20th.Oct.2009

2009-10-19T22:43:00.000-07:00

I am grateful for a new beautiful day
I am grateful for all the dreams i have. Thank God i have dreams
I am grateful for what i have, the clothes to put on, the job that i like, and the shoes i am weearing
I am grateful that i am healthy
I am grateful for such a friendly company
I am grateful that my Boss has always paid me on time no matter what
I am grateful for a big wonderful future ahead of me
Thank you Jesus, Master of the Universe.

Grateful

2009-10-19T07:18:00.000-07:00

I am grateful that i have dreams
I am grateful that i have hope, i live with hope, and i live with it everyday
I am grateful that where to sleep, what to eat, the appetite and the money to buy whatever i want to eat
I am grateful for every breath that i breathe

Gratitude.

2009-10-15T22:42:00.000-07:00

16th.Oct.2009

Everyeday grateful

Today i am grateful to God for the gift of life. I am physically healthy, strong and active.
I thank all the people that are in my people and more especially those that have found a connection in me as much as i have found a connection in them.

I am grateful that i have what to eat.
I am grateful that i have worry whatsoever that lies deep in my mind.
I am feeling better and musical.
I am vibrant.

I am inspired to live, and so grateful for that too...