Intimidating Uncle

How Now My Little Droogies?

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 18:15:00 +0000

Where is your mom's giant phallus?

How did you break your arm playing video games?

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Tue, 22 Sep 2009 22:36:00 +0000

I notice that no one has signed your cast.

Good Thing We Are Not British.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Fri, 18 Sep 2009 09:19:00 +0000

One day you will realize what you being part of your parents wedding means.

How Many Princesses Do You Know From Indiana?

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 06:58:00 +0000

I'm not exactly sure what it is you think you are smiling about.

Well At Least You Will Serve A Purpose In Life.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 07:45:00 +0000

Sucks to be you huh?

You Pull Anything Off That Desk, And You Are Going To Get It!

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 01:33:00 +0000

Why don't you leave the cliff hanging to Sly Stalone?

Who Said That Was Okay?

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 04:10:00 +0000

You think you are some sort of pastoral computer nymph? Guess what. You aren't.

Big Dreams Lead To Big Disappointments.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 19:42:00 +0000

Your parent's house is probably as close as you will ever come to living in a castle.

Just You Shut Your Mouth.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Sun, 30 Aug 2009 22:40:00 +0000

Just remember, you aren't a China girl. You won't be small and cute forever.

Yeah, What Is The Point Of It All?

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Sun, 30 Aug 2009 01:10:00 +0000

Why don't you write a poem about it?

What Part Of Do Not Touch The Cannon Did You Not Understand?

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 07:01:00 +0000

Why don't you ask your dad about his 10lb balls?

Didn't I Tell You To Shut The Door?

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 04:17:00 +0000

If you still need that hat to poop in thirty years... I hope you live far, far away.

Call Me When You Can Walk On Your Own.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 20:11:00 +0000

You got a cigarette lighter in that thing?

Get Some Clothes That Fit!

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 16:41:00 +0000

Just because you are cute, doesn't give you cart-blanche to put your feet all over the furniture.

I Guess A Sucker Is Born Every Minute.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 08:12:00 +0000

Do you think you could look a little more pathetic for me?

You Should Go Outside More.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 00:57:00 +0000

Being super white is not a super power.

It Is Called A Race For A Reason.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Sun, 23 Aug 2009 12:08:00 +0000

This makes me think of an egg I bet your mom wishes she didn't drop.

Stop "Stairing" At Me Like That.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 20:42:00 +0000

I don't really know how you could be more useless.

Liver Problems Can Cause Jaundice Like That.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 04:14:00 +0000

People really won't want to talk to you if you act both sad and weird.

It Is Not That Kind Of Blackberry.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Tue, 18 Aug 2009 03:27:00 +0000

I see you take after your mother.

What Are You, Special In The Bad Way?

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Sun, 16 Aug 2009 19:46:00 +0000

Most people like to eat with things called utensils, and sit at things called tables.

Are You Supposed To Be A King Or A Queen?

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Sun, 16 Aug 2009 01:52:00 +0000

This is a phase I hope you grow out of soon.

Pitching Tents Already?

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Fri, 14 Aug 2009 22:14:00 +0000

No. Indians live in India, not in teepees.

Which One Of You Sheds More?

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Fri, 14 Aug 2009 01:08:00 +0000

You know dimples are actually a birth defect, right?

I Don't Know If You Look More Like Your Mom, Or Your Dad.

noreply@blogger.com (Charles McCarthy) — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 15:59:00 +0000

You know Heineken is basically Pabst from the Netherlands, don't you?