Is It Beer Time Yet?

Catholic Sons

Four Catholic ladies were having coffee. The first Catholic woman told her friends, “My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him ‘Father’.” The second Catholic woman chirped, “My son is a bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people call him ‘Your Grace’.” The third Catholic said, “My son is a [...]

Good Excuse

A man was driving home late one afternoon, and he was driving above the speed limit. He notices a police car with its red lights on in his rear view mirror. He thinks “I can outrun this guy,” so he floors it and the race is on. The cars are racing down the highway — [...]

3 Wishes

A huge muscular man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender hands him the beer and says, “You know, I’m not gay but I want to compliment you on your physique, it really is phenomenal! I have a question though, why is your head so small?” The big guy nods slowly. He’s obviously [...]

Should you tip the blackjack dealer?

A blackjack dealer and a player with a thirteen count in his hand were arguing about whether or not it was appropriate to tip the dealer. The player said, “When I get bad cards, it’s not the dealer’s fault. Accordingly, when I get good cards, the dealer obviously had nothing to do with it so, why [...]

Getting a Sperm Count

A 75 year old man went to his doctors office to get a sperm count. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, Take this jar home and bring me back a sample tomorrow. The next day the 75 year old man reappears at the doctors office and gives him the jar, which is as [...]

Torpedo

During World War II, an American warship was attacked by the Japanese. A torpedo was heading towards the ship and a hit seemed inevitable. The captain told the navigator to go down to the crew quarters and tell a joke or something – at least they would die laughing. The navigator went down and said to [...]

Male Virgin

After working for many long, hard years a hooker decides to finally retire. Fearful of spending the rest of her life alone, she also decides to marry. Having been with so many perverted men over the years, she felt that she needed a change and committed to marrying only a virgin male approx. the same [...]

Technical Support

Management has determined that there is no longer any need for network or software applications support. Instead, everyone will be provided with an Etch-A-Sketch. There are many sound reasons for doing this: 1. No technical glitches keeping work from being done. 2. No more wasted time reading and writing emails. Frequently Asked Questions for Etch-A-Sketch Technical Support Q: My Etch-A-Sketch [...]

Leaving work early

A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde all worked in the same office with the same female boss. Every day, they noticed their boss left work early. One day,the girls decided that when the boss left, they’d leave right behind her. After all, she never called in or came back to the office when she left [...]

Assassin Training

A few months ago, there was an opening in the CIA for an assassin. These highly classified positions are hard to fill, and there is a lot of testing and background checking involved before you can even be considered for the position. After sending many applicants through the background checks, training and testing, they narrowed the possible [...]