Isolated Dreams

Amanda Lee | WritersCafe.org

2011-12-15T20:11:00.000-08:00

Amanda Lee | WritersCafe.org

2011-11-15T16:06:00.000-08:00

Masking the symptoms, ignoring the source

Which came first, the sound or the noise?

The little we owe, the seconds we strain

You last till outlasted, you struggle in vain

The egg or the bird, the word or the tell

The moment we noticed

We’re not doing so well

The place or the people, the people in place

The turnout turned down, the vision erased

We long for the fragments, we stretch towards the voice

We hear the time speaking

And still ask it more.

We’re running on pavement, and skipping the cracks

We long for the silence

We’ll never get back.

-A.L.J-

2011-11-02T08:04:00.000-07:00

"... Poetry is created because we are lonely, scared, grateful, joyous, decaying, grieving, angry, visionary, vital. To make sense of life. Our realities. Both harsh and stunning..."

- Margot Van Sluytman

Keep Me Grounded

2011-10-20T07:14:00.000-07:00

Keep me grounded while I'm falling,
I'm liquid and you're stone
I feel the things you offer
The course that you postpone.
Your subtle indignations
Lined up to be nailed down
Rigid at the fault lines,
I caved this time around.

I wrap my fingers round you
Please hold me to the ground.

-A.L.J-

2011-10-20T07:00:00.000-07:00

Rainy days, the clouds make way, and shape themselves into a gray
Muddy skies, like tear-stained eyes, bound in droplets running dry
A hunger growls, the windows howl, drawn out colors shade the wall
A static state, of blacks and grays
A white that bleeds an impure slate.
Transitions pause, a dormant clause, the earth dissolves into it's flaws
A static state, of aging grays, time slides by on frozen lakes.

-A.L.J-

2011-09-23T15:05:00.000-07:00

I admire the girl there

Up on the hill

Who's lost her damn mind

But is finding her will

Who's feeding the storm

And dragging her teeth

Across the wet grass

And tasting relief

Who walks in the crowds

But still stands alone

Who dances on stars

Just to follow them home

Who opens her mind

To let it spill on the floor

Who's winning the battle

But losing their war.

Who watches whose watching

That touches what's passed

Who catches the breeze

And inhales it's mass

Who's better off knowing

That knowings no good

That wisdom will fail you

When you knew it would

She follows the seasons

And changes with leaves

She sets with the sun

And lives in the breeze.

-Amanda Jowsey-

2011-09-23T14:56:00.000-07:00

It's nice to hear your voice, and even nicer still to know your name...

I'd pretend that it's no bother, you'll pretend you're still the same.

Just to pass you on the sidewalk, where these imprints left their mark,

Just to hold you for an hour, just a whisper in the dark...

If I left you out to dry, and the waters took you in

Someone's sure to claim their prize, before you're lost again.

And the timing of it all, in the place I gave you up,

The walking slows to crawls, the crawlings just to drop.

Our patterns so much older, none wiser all the less

When the world falls around you, my heart bleeds through my chest.

I chalked you up in stories, you breathe into the cause

You're half-stained muddy lime-lights illuminate your flaws

In a feeling half-departed, in a moment in my skin

Your absences surround you, I'm afraid to take you in.

I chalked you up in stories, you choked me up instead

I'll leave you on the sidewalk,I'll leave you in my head.

-Amanda Jowsey

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2011-09-23T12:53:00.000-07:00

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A Summer's Breath

2011-08-31T08:04:00.000-07:00

To fade away, more simple days

A feeling forever remembered...

A summer's breath,

In silence on a summer's eve

Barely moving in the moment,

Entangled love on a fleeting summer's dream.

A sunset, a lake, time stays in rhythm with your heart,

A morning, it's mist, the quiet slumber of it's dark.

-Amanda Jowsey

Naturally Disturbed

2011-05-22T17:03:00.000-07:00

I’m deep

So deep

It bleeds

And you,

You’re hard

As rock

You’re double-blinded muck.

You’ll stay

You’ll leave

You take the best of me.

You’re in

You’re out,

You’re shallow, muddied-doubt.

You feel

I hurt

You are

Not worth

A damn. Instead,

We’ll slide across the earth.

You’re clay,

So soft

It turns into the rust

You left

To harden in my chest.

I went

To see

And there you were among the trees,

That drop

To lows

Of puddles on the shore.

To hold,

The ground

You’ve faltered on without a sound

Of pride

Or lies--

You’ll wave, I’ll say goodbye.

And I,

I wept

Into your shallow depth,

Where you

The joke,

Choked up in silent modes

Of life,

or force

That drown your nature’s course.

-A.L.J-

Falling, Fading, Changing (Sonnet)

2011-01-04T14:09:00.000-08:00

Another year older, falling like our innocence,

The Autumn leaves remind me not to blink.

Watching time hit the ground with it's imminence,

Another season changes us in sync.

Beauty making way for darker shades

For it's time to fade into the slumber,

Always leftovers holding on

To proudly show the green they still encumber.

It's dormancy replaces life,

The world stands ready in attempts to prepare

The way each day must fade to night

Our cores quickly harden in attempts to compare.

Disappearing remnants, finely ground into the dirt,

This is the way we're always falling, fading, changing with the earth.

~A.L.J~

Silly-Hearted-Dreamer

2011-01-04T11:13:00.001-08:00

I’m just a silly-hearted dreamer, a silly-minded girl,

Silly feeling, silly thinking, in a silly kind of world…

Expecting disappointment, knowing well the truth,

That once it’s going, it is gone, whats lost was meant to lose.

Uplifting forms of hoping, being let down by the show,

The pitiful reactions of the hearts we still bestow…

Embarrassed to confirm it, hardened by the act,

Transparent words reveal your mind and sincerity that you lack.

Drawing lines worth crossing, later on to be erased,

Re-making things worth more to me than the burden of your weight.

And still I’m left here tasting bitter words that stain my teeth,

For when I spoke this years ago, I withheld a vital piece…

The part that really meant it, the closure it encased,

You said goodbye and meant it without keeping a trace…

Although I knew you’d left me, although I knew that was the end,

That part of me had kept it there just in case you came again…

I no longer will be waiting, I no longer will believe,

No longer will I come again in the hopes that you’ll still be.

I’m just a silly-hearted dreamer, a silly-minded girl,

Yet no longer will I live in such a silly long-gone world.

~A.L.J~

Keeping Things You're Bound to Lose

2011-01-04T11:07:00.001-08:00

Written April 5, 2010

Your breath, the stale dead smell of promises,

Lies echoed in moments of your absences…

Your brain, fueled by loss you’ve gained,

Willed to live in something past,

Delusion feeds the rotting mass…

Your lines, empty, faded, drawn-out in former times.

You’re everything, I’m what?

What fades away is more than just.

Endless nonsense, leading truth

Back to off-beat patterns of your youth…

Engorged with dreams you’ve counted on,

These broken roads you’ve ran along…

To fester, only humanly of course,

For the one small seed you laid off course…

Recycle the moments glued to your head,

Remember the names you’ll forget in the end.

Your cruelty just an empty soul

That burns away extinguished coals.

You’re uninvited, half-alive,

Bleeding hearts are hung to dry,

Reeling heartache back to you

When you’re keeping things you’re bound to lose.

~A.L.J~

Old Friends Forgotten

2011-01-04T11:02:00.000-08:00

Written October 25, 2009

It’s time to let you go,

Since time won’t keep you here.

These years have pieced together one sum of every fear.

I could keep a moment locked inside my head,

You would take a memory alive and drag it back as dead…

To a person, you’re someone.

To a heart, you’re the beat.

To the only eyes that see you,

You’ve only shown deceit.

Old friends forgotten when a new one arrives

From a place you have known

To a place I now despise.

~A.L.J~