Blurted

My Favorite Fictional Characters

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Wed, 15 Dec 2010 04:50:00 +0000

Fictional or not, these "people" rock....so behold a list of my 15 favorite people who never existed (in no particular order) and why I love them so....

Marguerite St. Just (The Scarlet Pimpernel series)-because she is brave, passionate, loyal, frighteningly impulsive, and wonderful.

Heathcliff (Wuthering Heights)-because he is both heart-breakingly romantic and disturbingly psychotic in a way no other character can be.

Anne (Anne of Green Gables series)-because she is the first character I felt I could be best friends with.

Oz (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)-because he is smart and sweet and sarcastic, and the first character I wished I could date.

Buffy (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)-because she has her own universe...because she created her own language...because she reinvented the heroines of modern tv...because I am a nerd.

Don Quixote (Don Quixote)-because chivalry is never truly dead.

Nancy Drew (Nancy Drew series)-because nothing says awesome like a matching sweater set and a post-investigation sundae with Bess.

Dr. Horrible/Billy (Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog)-because he is the best anti-hero in the Whedonverse (Mal from Firefly being a close second), because he sings, because he is played by Neil-Freakin'-Patrick-Harris, and (once again) because I am a nerd.

Elizabeth Bennett (Pride and Prejudice)-because she was so ahead of her time, yet perfectly proper for her time.

Mr. Darcy (Pride and Prejudice)-because where Elizabeth goes, Mr. Darcy must follow...and because he is the fictional character I find most swoon-worthy as an adult.

Meg (A Wrinkle in Time)-because this was my first science fiction book and I always liked to think I was just like her.

Sherlock Holmes (Sherlock Holmes series)-because no matter how much I tried I could never be as smart as he is and I respect that.

The Gilmore Girls (The Gilmore Girls)-because their dialogue is so fantastic it makes them count as one character.

Gilbert Blythe (Anne of Green Gables)-because he can be honorable and playful at the same time...because I love him in the first book, but even in the last as an older man I appreciate him.

Holly Golightly-because how can you NOT love her?

Do you have a fictional character you were once best friends with (or just wish you were)? Ever had a crush on an imaginary person? I can't be alone.

O Christmas Break O Christmas Break

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Sat, 11 Dec 2010 20:06:00 +0000

Papers are in...all five of them. My only actual final has been taken. My application for the Honors Program is filled out and waiting deliberation (you'll cross your fingers, won't you?) and the breath I've been holding since Thanksgiving (and the beginning of the finals crunch) has finally been exhaled and I'm ready to do normal things again like cook meals that aren't frozen, go to bed before 5am, blog (yay), and celebrate Christmas!

Naturally, due to my Type A personality, I am not able to just sit around and do nothing (also known as "relaxing" among the non-crazy). I have decided that I need Christmas-break-olutions.

1. Start setting up a food regimen so that I remember to eat more than 500 calories a day.

2. Start an exercise regimen so that I can give a little boost to the weight I'll lose by eating on a regular basis and actually...you know...get in shape. It's been successful so far-between Tuesday and Friday I've lost six pounds thanks to my new ability to remember to eat stuff and a butt-kicking workout courtesy of my friend Kirsty. You really should check out her Slim and Strong Cyber-Style program (click the button to email her and get more information!).

3. Potty train Baby Bug. Or at least ramp up the potty activity. I'd like to get her on the bandwagon by January when I return to school.

4. Write more. On my blog, and off. After taking that Writing 121 class I am finding my really motivated to put pen to paper.

Of course these are all above and beyond my usual Christmas stuff-make tree decorations (popcorn/cranberry garland is up!), Christmas shopping, making so many holiday baked goods I have to give them away to save myself from an unreasonable holiday fattening...it's going to be a great Christmas break!

What are you all doing for the holidays?

All About Thanksgiving

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Mon, 22 Nov 2010 20:50:00 +0000

Due to the crazy number of papers I've had to think about (the end of Fall quarter is only 4 classes away!) I'm afraid I have sorely neglected my blog (and sleep)...and sadly that includes a favorite Monday meme of mine-All About Me Monday. Luckily I am sick today and now I have time to do things besides school...and just in time for the Thanksgiving edition of All About Me Monday!

Yummm....Thanksgiving....

1. What is your most favorite thing about Fall?
Pies. I don't really eat pies (mostly just Quiche Florentine and Pecan on special occasions) but I love making pies. It makes my house warm and yummy smelling, and whoever I give them to is always extra grateful when Christmas comes around.

2. How many Thanksgiving tables will you dine at this year?
Two. We will have a Thanksgiving meal here on Wednesday and then we will go to my parent's house for Thanksgiving.

3. Turkey for dinner? Or something else?
We are going to have ham this year (and mashed potatoes, and deviled eggs, and cranberries, and green beans, and yams) but my parents always have Chinese food. That's why we do real Thanksgiving food at our house first.

4. Do you stuff your turkey? Do you eat that stuffing?
When we do have turkey I put a heated, punctured orange in the middle it makes it really moist and I don't have to worry about the turkey not cooking.

5. Who will be attending your Thanksgiving dinner?
At our house just us (unless we have an unexpected guest, which we're cool with). When we go to my parents it will be my dad, my step mom, my sister, my brother in law, my niece, my husband, me, and the kidlets with possible guest appearances from my step sister (with her boyfriend) and my step brother (with my step sister in law and my nephew)...but pretty much everybody likes to have Thanksgiving at their in-laws houses since they have Thanksgiving with turkey instead of orange chicken.

6. What is your favorite Thanksgiving side dish?
Hmmm....that's hard. I think probably deviled eggs.

7. For the dieters: what are you doing to prepare for the gluttony of Thursday?
I'm exercising all week-no excuses! I don't really diet (my problem is remembering to eat at all!) but I know I'm going to have to put in the extra squats for ham AND sweet and sour chicken.

8. Will you go shopping on Black Friday?
Hell no. I will not come within 1000 feet of that insanity. I will be home in my warm cuddly bed, sleeping, far away from the crazy hair ripping people fighting over the last pink cardigan. I don't even leave the house until after 4pm on Black Friday for fear I'll run into someone on a crazy shopping high in traffic.

How do you celebrate Thanksgiving? Are you one of the Black Friday crazies? Hook up with All About Me Monday!

Holiday Stripdown

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Mon, 22 Nov 2010 00:47:00 +0000

You know what really makes Thanksgiving special? Family, thankfulness, good food and, of course, gettin' jiggy with your friendly neighborhood TSA agent. Nothing can make you feel that holiday glow like going through the naked-maker before you get on a plane...except maybe refusing to go through it and having to getting really, really personal with Shanaynay in Airport Security. Nothing says "Happy Thanksgiving" like getting grabbed in the naughty bits, in public, by a complete stranger.

Just like the Pilgrims.

But let's say that you're just not feeling up to public molestation this holiday season (and who could blame you? Especially on the return trip when you can barely button your pants)-you could always opt out. Ride a train, take a bus, drive your car...teleport! Separating, evaporating, and then reconstructing all of your molecules thousands of miles away would be less invasive after all. Plus if you decide to opt out of air-grab-ass on the 24th you could actually make an important social statement about your Constitutional rights at the same time.

If you had no plans to fly anywhere (due to an unnatural fear of flying like I have or if you were already protesting) you can always call or write your Representative and/or your Senator
and invite them to enjoy a free plane ride/public groping...on you.

Fly Away

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Thu, 11 Nov 2010 20:31:00 +0000

My baby has spread her wings. After six months of toddling along beside me she finally got the courage to let go and walk on her own. It's wonderful...and sad. The Bean is my last baby, and she is quickly growing out of her baby ways. Soon I will have only a house full of big kids. Later (but soon enough) I will have a house full of teenagers. Eventually I will have an empty nest, and nothing makes me sadder than the idea of being a Mama bird with no babies to snuggle.

Hopefully by the time my Beanie is eighteen I will have grandbabies to cuddle with-hey, Monkey will be 23 by then and I had three children by that time!

Thinking of Monkey at 23 makes me need a glass of water.

This new adventure is going to be so wonderful for her-The Bean is going to be able to find out new things about the world around her. She will have new experiences, some painful but most of them good. She is just at the beginning of one of the most wonderful times in life-her childhood. I am so proud and happy for her...I'll just have to take as many pictures as possible and try to remember everything as clearly as possible so that I never forget how sweet she is and what it was like to have my littlest baby holding tight onto my hand.

Guess What I Am Doing Right Now

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Fri, 05 Nov 2010 02:23:00 +0000

Not homework, that's for sure. I have had it up to my eyeballs with homework, so I'm going to check out on the paper writing until at least Sunday afternoon.

Aren't I a good student? [Actually, I kind of am but procrastinating still makes me feel guilty.]

This weekend I've decided to do fun things instead. Today I taught Monkey how to play Uno-I can't believe how big he is! Old enough to play card games and everything (cue sentimental eye mist). I also played dress up with Baby Bug and sang with The Bean and made special trail mix for the kidlets for snack. Tonight I'm going to relax with Hubby and watch Bones and Big Bang Theory.

Yeah, that's way better than writing two sample introductions for my rhetorical analysis paper.

Tomorrow I am planning to sleep in. Like, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaall the way in until I wake up on my own. It's a glorious thing. When I do wake up, we're going to do a lot of fun fall stuff. The babies and I are going to make pecan pie from scratch. Then when Hubby gets home from his midterm I'm going to take a walk with the big kids to collect leaves and acorns so we can come home and make collages! There will be much glitter involved.

And we all know that glitter is far superior to a six page paper on national policy issues.

On Saturday we are all going to have a family movie day. All pajamas, all movies, all the time.

It totally beats going over my citation page.

Sunday of course is our eight year anniversary. I am really hoping that we can find a babysitter so Hubby and I can go watch a movie and go out to dinner, but we'll see. Even if we just stay in and have an early bedtime for the kids and a fireplace snuggly night for us I think that would be lovely...

...and much more important than any of that school stuff. Eight years is basically a third of my life after all-and I can't imagine a better way to celebrate these last eight years with the love of my life than by spending time with my Hubby and the beautiful family we've created.

For now, school can wait.

Voting is Sexy

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Sat, 30 Oct 2010 06:35:00 +0000

Voting will make your teeth whiter*. Voting makes your hair shiny**, your cheeks rosy***, and your breath smell like a field of fresh mint.**** Voting helps you lose those last 10lbs.*****

You know you want to...plus Google Maps will tell you exactly where to go to cast your vote!

Voting is the most important civic duty you have******. Make a difference, make yourself heard, and help your community and country grow!

Happy Election Day!

*Teeth will show more as a consequence of smiling. Teeth may or may not actually be objectively "whiter".
**Hair will shine in the sunlight surrounding ballot box. Shine may or may not be directly enhanced by the act of voting.
***The thrill of voting has been known to cause a flush of excitement. If flush of excitement continues more than an hour or you experience unusual heart palpitations, difficulty breathing, or blurry vision call your doctor immediately.
****This statement is only applicable to people who are chewing gum at the time of ballot casting.
*****Hey-it could happen.
******According to some Political Science students(1), voting and jury duty are tied for the most important civic duties you have.

(1) M, Mrs. "Voting is Sexy." November 2, 2010. Blurted. Web. November 2, 2010.

Laugh and Awww

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Thu, 28 Oct 2010 14:28:00 +0000

I love TV. Seriously, I have more shows than I have time in the day...hence my undying love for my DVR. How I Met Your Mother, Bones, The Daily Show, House, Mythbusters, Big Bang Theory, Psych, Royal Pains, Glee...I'm lucky when my total used memory space is under 70%.

Still, much to my DVR(and husband)'s dismay, another show has caught my eye...but I swear it is super awesome and worth the memory space. Have you seen Raising Hope? I can't get enough of it!

Basically it's about a kid in his early 20s who has a baby. He lives with his young parents and his senile great grandmother, and it is hilarious. It reminds me of Malcolm in the Middle, which I also loved, only unlike Malcolm it has a huge awwww factor. While watching the pilot I almost peed my pants, but by the end I seriously misted up because it was so sweet.

I love shows like that.

I also love shows which I can watch on Hulu, just in case one of my other shows has a marathon and uses up all my DVR space.

What shows do you love? Are you a TV junkie like me or a casual watcher?

Check Me Out

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Wed, 27 Oct 2010 14:13:00 +0000

blurt

–verb (used with object)

1.to utter suddenly or inadvertently; divulge impulsively ('blurted out')

...it's what I'll be doing here. That's right, I've rebranded as a verb-because that's what life is all about. Being, doing, saying...I'm so excited! You may be wondering-what kind of stuff am I going to be blurting out around here? Well you can never know for sure. I like the endless possibility angle. But to give you some sort of direction, I am going to give you a few peaks into what I will be talking about.

How about topics in the form of prizes? I love giving stuff away (hey, that's kind of a topic in and of itself)!

Because I love talking about kids and parenting, and completely plan on continuing to do so, I'm going to be giving away a handmade tutu dress, just like this tutu halter dress I made for Baby Bug as a part of her Halloween costume...

You'll be able to pick your own colors and length of course (I'm happy to make you a regular length tutu) and if you want flowers or not...whatever you think your little one would like best! The tutu dresses are a lot of fun for dress up, and I think they'd make a great birthday (or Christmas!) present too.

You know what else I like to talk about? Politics and pop culture. I am both a PoliSci major and a twenty-something so you probably saw that coming. In celebration of the awesomeness that is politics and pop culture (I'm going to call that "policulture") I'm going to give away a copy of Earth-The Book, which is written by our friends at The Daily Show.

[WARNING! In case you couldn't tell by the comedian sitting next to a chimp on the cover, this a comedic book, not a textbook. There is some material that is for adults only. If it were on TV it would seriously have all of the LVSDPDQ parental guidance ratings...but it's still awesome.]

So what else is there to talk about? How about all things nerd. It just comes naturally with the territory of me that you will run into geek activities-I have been known to listen to Weird Al while writing scripts for a website before closing out the day with a Firefly/Serenity marathon. The ring tones on my cell phone have been recently changed to songs from "Once More With Feeling" (the Buffy musical episode) and Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog, and nothing gets me more excited than a gadget!

It's nerdvana up in here, and I'll probably be talking about it in my blog so I figured, why not help you get your nerd on too? That's why I'm going to be giving away a $20 gift certificate to ThinkGeek, my all-time-favorite nerd spot on the interwebz. And lest you think you'll end up with a can opener, let me promise you-you can buy everything from t-shirts to interactive Star Trek Tribbles for $20 or less! [Which makes it another awesome Christmas idea! I've already picked out two of Hubby's presents from ThinkGeek.]

Of course, these things only begin to jump into all of the cool things I'm going to be talking about here on Blurted...but giving away some cool stuff is a pretty good first hop. If you want to win the prizes, you have two ways of going about it.

Option One: Take my new schmancy button! [See: Below] Put it on your page and leave a comment with a link to where you posted it and telling me what you want to win. After that you can get up to one entry a day just by leaving a comment! Also awesome: if someone stops by and leaves a comment telling me they found me through your site they'll get one entry and you will get an extra entry!! [unlimited extra entries after your first entry!]

Option Two: Tweet it! It works pretty much the same as above-if you Tweet @blurtedblog you'll get one entry! If someone RTs you they get an entry and you get an extra entry [unlimited extra entries!]

The giveaway will go for two weeks and then I will use Random.Org to go through all of the entries and select a winner for a special-super-top-secret giveaway prize (hints coming starting next Wednesday)!!!

I am so stoked to branch out and start a new direction, and give away some cool stuff while I'm at it! Good luck everybody!

P.S. My email address is changing too! You can now drop me a line at write(dot)blurted(at)gmail(dot)com.

Rebranding Day! [Technical Difficulties Version]

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Mon, 25 Oct 2010 21:00:00 +0000

I launched my rebranded blog on Wednesday, I really did. You just can't tell because Google Friend Connect isn't being very friendly. I am sorry for any confusion-I hope to have everything fixed soon!

It's decided. My official rebranding is going to launch Wednesday...and I have lots of goodies to giveaway to celebrate! Ooooh and guess what, the gifts have a theme! All of the prizes I'm giving away are going to represent topics I'm going to talk about on my newly rebranded blog.

Something for your kidlet...
Something for your nerd fix...
Something about books and and electronics...
Something to do with pop culture and politics....
Something for your blog...

The prizes will be officially announced on Wednesday, so stop by to check out the new digs and enter to win some awesome prizes!

Ch-ch-ch-changes

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Sat, 23 Oct 2010 22:48:00 +0000

Rebranding.

Just wanted to get that out there, though the thought of it makes me throw up in my mouth a little. I am generally adverse to change of any kind, and I tend to take differences in my life or schedule similar to the way a cat would if you tried to flush it down the toilet. Still, as you may have noticed lately, there is a greater theme going on in my life right now and that happens to revolve around c-h-a-n-g-e.

You've probably also noticed that I have been talking a lot lately about the idea that I want to be able to say whatever I want on my blog. I have opinions about stuff-why don't I write about politics or religion or philosophy or how much I can't stand people who are famous only for being famous?

Because I'm chicken, that's why. I'm afraid that writing about politics on my mommy blog is too divisive. That if I write about religion people will get hurt, or that if I write about philosophy my audience will be bored, or if I let it be known that I am a smoker that everyone will jump ship on my blog....I worried and fretted and vexed myself into a flat, two dimentional corner of blog land where if I write about anything more than poop or homeschool I have anxiety about how it will be received.

And then, just lately, I realized what I knew but hadn't been realizing-no one is two dimensional. Not me, and not you. You probably get sick of reading about poop. Maybe you like politics. Maybe you think it's interesting to read about religion.

One or two of you might even be smokers.

I had built you all, my audience, up on such a high pedestal that I began assuming you were only interested in talking about your life long devotion to your families and what the best zucchini bread recipe is. Now I realize that while we all obviously think those things are important [especially the zucchini bread, right? : )], we all have other things to talk about too.

So I guess what I'm saying is, I want to talk about everything. Kids and husbands, work and school, religion and politics, books and websites, celebrities and other annoyances, TV shows, and what it's like to be a smoker in a country which equates smoking with taking a dump on a public sidewalk...and I don't think that I can do that under the I've Changed My Name to Mommy brand. I love my blog, and it's not ending-it' just growing and changing a little.

While I'm in the process of rebranding, I want your input! What are you interested in? What do you like to talk about? What do you think about rebranding...will you keep following me? What kind of celebration do you think we should have once I'm ready to premiere my rebranded site? Giveaways? Contests?

You know, even though I don't like change, I think this may be fun.

I Wanna Talk About...Work!

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Sun, 17 Oct 2010 17:27:00 +0000

Okay so technically I don't "work" so much as "labor without pay"...but I think I can still participate with Lisa this week.

1. Part time, Full time, or no time?
Double time. With no pay.

2. What do you do for a living?
I'm a full time college student (double major Philosophy/Political Science with a minor in Chinese Language and Culture working toward a law degree) and a full time homeschooling mom of three kidlets six and under.

3. Scale of 1 to 10-- how much do you love your job?
9.5-seriously. I love my babies, I love homeschooling, I love college...sure some days I am so busy I forget to eat for 20 hours and nearly pass out while driving, but hey. The big ups are worth the exhaustion. I just hope being a lawyer is half as fun!

4. What does your typical work day attire consist of?
Whatever I want-isn't that awesome!? I don't have to impress anybody at school because I'm already married and I'm not looking to be social, and I don't have to impress the fam because they'd love me no matter what I wore! This will definitely change when I am an attorney.

5. When you were a kid, what did you always say you were going to be when you grew up?
I didn't really remember wanting to be anything-I had a lot of my plate just to do what was in front of me to do. But I have always loved the order of law and the idea of justice.

6. Is your job a job or a career?
Right now it's all passion, but eventually I hope to get wonderful adult children and a decent career out of the deal.

7. I hate commuting! What do you do when you’re stuck in traffic?
Sing! People think I'm crazy, but it relaxes me and helps me to avoid opening up my door, walking into traffic, and screaming at people LEARN HOW TO MERGE!!!!!!! LoL.

If you wanna talk about work, hop over and visit Lisa!

Cat-astrophe OR Kitty Von Awesome

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Sat, 16 Oct 2010 05:55:00 +0000

So remember how we got a cat? And remember how adorable she is with her cute little face and her awesome name (Princess Pepperdoodle Von Yum Yum)? Here's a reminder...

See isn't she just precious?! She loves that mouse. Anyway...

It gets better.

Turns out my step father in law is allergic to cats. He is, in fact, so allergic to cats that my inlaws have been rendered medically unable to come to our house. No more totally unexpected and unannounced drive by visits. No more bratty 7 and 8 year old sister in laws tearing things up, bullying my kids, being obnoxious in my air space, and generally getting into things that they aren't supposed to. No more "we were in the neighborhood and thought we'd surprise you...oh my look at how dirty your house is..."

Do you hear that? Ahhhhh-aaaaah-aaaaah! It's the sound of angels singing.

Obviously I'm excited about this (how could I not be?) but there is one thing about this situation that's kind of a drag. My mother in law told my husband she thinks I did this on purpose, like I have some kind of list of known allergies of all of my husband's relatives. That's right, my mother in law accused me of adopting a sweet adorable little kitten out of spite. I know, I'm a total jerk.

Blog friends, I super double pinky promise you that I did not know my step father in law is allergic to cats prior to the adoption of Princess Pepperdoodle Von Yum Yum, nor was I aware that it would render them entirely unable to ~~intrude on our lives~~ visit...

...I just consider that the unexpected yet fabulous gift with purchase.

Unconditional Love

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Thu, 14 Oct 2010 21:46:00 +0000

I thought very long and hard before posting about this, because I know it's controversial but I really feel like it's important...Moms, sit down-we need to talk about gay bullying.

I'll start by saying that I'm not telling you what to believe. If you believe that being gay is not okay for any reason, that is your right and I would not change your mind but I will say this-would you rather have a gay kid or a dead kid? Suicide is a serious and growing concern among LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) teens, mostly because gay and lesbian kids get bullied two to three times more often than their heterosexual classmates. Bullying can lead to depression which, for many, leads to suicide. Even if you dislike the idea of having a gay child I think we can all agree that we don't want our babies to suffer, or to commit violence on themselves.

Gay bullying starts where all bullying starts-at home. According to one study, 26% of teenagers who come out to their parents are kicked out of their homes and approximately 1 in 5 homeless youth are LGBT. Another study tells us that 62% of LGBT teens experience discrimination within their own families (as opposed to 30% of heterosexual peers) and we know that between 320,000 and 400,000 LGBT teenagers face homelessness every year. We as parents need to evaluate our own actions-What are our attitudes toward LGBT people, and how do they show up in our children? Are we examples of unconditional love for our children as well as for our neighbors, who may be different than we are? If our children were gay, could they come to us and know they would be safe?

As mothers, most of us accept that it is our privilege and duty to love our children unconditionally. When they poop on us, we love them. When they lie to us, we love them. When they dye their hair blue and listen to nothing but music which sounds like monkey death wails we love them. When they come home only to do their laundry, we love them. Through better and worse, forever and ever, we love our children...so we need to let them know that being gay is just one of a million things they can do that we wouldn't stop loving them for, no matter what our feelings on it from a personal or religious standpoint. We need to show them that it is not something we mistreat others for, and that it is unacceptable to treat lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or questioning peers with anything less than the common decency they are expected to show everyone else.

It doesn't have to be a scary prospect. Our kids don't have to live in fear, and we don't have to change our political or religious feelings. We can make a difference in the lives of LGBT youth-all we have to do is show them our unconditional motherly love.

*****

If you are the parent, family member, or friend of an LGBT child or teen you can visit the PFLAG website to get support and information about how you can support your loved one.

If you are a child or teen who is struggling with sexual identity issues, you can visit the YouTube channel for the It Gets Better Project to find inspirational stories from adult members of the LGBT community.

...Can't Read This...

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Thu, 14 Oct 2010 05:35:00 +0000

In my opinion, blogs are meant for sharing-unless it's my blog, and and I'm supposed to be sharing with my family...when it comes to them my policy is "Blog? What blog? I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about." Even my mother in law who knows for certain that I have a blog (thanks to Hubby's big mouth) doesn't know where it is and when she asks me I just get all avoid-y or pretend I didn't hear her. In fact, I'm pretty sure I can say that if she did find my blog and confronted me about it I would flat out deny ownership. So if you're reading this dear relatives (including but not limited to my MIL) don't bother pointing out my picture on the bio page or the similarities to my life because I'll just pretend like you're crazy...trust me, that would not be difficult.

In reality, it's not just relatives who are blacklisted on my blog-the only people I know in real life that know about my blog are my husband and my best friend who I have known for more than ten years. Why don't I tell all the other people?

Because I wanna write what I wanna write and I don't need anybody to tell me any different.

If I want to complain about my dad or snipe about my in laws or roll my eyes at my siblings, I don't want to have to worry that it's going to bite me in the butt at Thanksgiving. I don't want my classmates involved in my private life, or my family involved in my inner thoughts so it just works better to not tell them.

Also, to be perfectly honest, it's just one more thing that my family wouldn't get. I don't think my parents even know what a blog is, my siblings don't care, and my in laws think they are a joke so you know...why bother? Let's just keep this the secret tree house.

The fortress of (extremely public) solitude that I share with only my awesome bloggy friends, my best friend, and my husband. You know-the cool kids.

Just don't tell my parents.

[This post was inspired by Writer's Workshop. Go visit Mama Kat for more!]

What Am I, Dirt?

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Tue, 12 Oct 2010 07:52:00 +0000

As I discussed in my previous post about birthdays, I am about to turn 25 [in 39 days!]. I am under no illusions-I know that I am still very young...so why does everyone around me insist on making me feel so outdated?!

Example Number One
I was getting my hair permed (yes it's adorable, and yes I will post pictures soon-ish). While sitting in the chair subjecting my hair to the tortures of beauty the radio in the parlor was bumping some adult contemporary hits of the "80s, 90s, and today". After a flood of Sting, Culture Club, and Shania Twain a song came on...and it was Ace of Base! The Sign-you know the one. So I get all excited, right? I ask the hair dresser what station we were listening to and she tells me, saying then"why do you ask?"

To which I responded, "Because it's Ace of Base! This was the first tape I ever owned! I haven't heard this on the radio in probably 15 years." And do you know what she said?

...Who is Ace of Base?...

Seriously. Turns out when I was bouncing around to my favorite Ace of Base tape, funky dark house techno pop blasting from my Walkman, my hair dresser was 3.

Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice. That doesn't make me feel ancient at all. [Sarcasm] At least it wasn't as bad as...

Scenario Number Two
I was at the counter in the grocery store this past Sunday, chatting with a new check out girl. Somehow we ended up telling me that when she was little people used to tell her she looked like Hillary Duff. Of course, that should have been a sign. I should have known she was a baby and just let it go. But no-of course I have to say "The only people I've ever been compared to are Daria Morgandorfer and Lisa Loeb...but of course I'm not a cartoon and I haven't looked like Lisa Loeb for about 100lbs." The girl behind the counter stares at me blankly for a moment and then said,

"Who is Daria Morganhoffer?"

Arg.

Then she says, "And what about that other lady...Lisa something. What did she do?"

ARG!

Since I'm not getting 100 years older every birthday I have come to the conclusion that it's not me, it's them. I'm not really getting that much older, it's just all the people working in stores these days are getting younger. A LOT younger.

I Wanna Talk About....Birthdays!

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Sun, 10 Oct 2010 19:40:00 +0000

It's time for I Wanna Talk About Me day, courtesy of my friend Lisa, and this week it's all about birthdays! I love birthdays (other people's-happy birthday to Lisa's mom and her husband Wiley!) and getting older (myself)...I just don't like my actual birthdays-they never go well. Still, birthdays in general are worth celebrating, don't you think?

1. How many candles will go on your next birthday cake?
25! I know-milestone birthday. Yay for cheaper insurance! [No making fun of me for being young-I promise I am far more tired and curmudgeonly than most people my age.]

2. Where were you born?
I was actually born in Georgia, but my parents moved to the Great North West when I was a few months old so my home is here.

3. Hey, Baby… what’s your sign?
Scorpio...but really I'm not that mean.

4. If you could get a $100 giftcard to the store of your choice, which store would you choose?
Uh....anywhere that sells kitchen appliances.

5 And what would you buy with that $100?
A blender, a huge frying pan, and a counter top grill (okay, that's probably more than $100 altogether but hey...this is my imaginary gift card).

6. Do you have a party for your birthday? Details!
Never (as an adult). The last birthday party I had was when I turned 16 and all I can say about it is that it sucked. All the ones before it sucked too, so I figure we'll just avoid those like the plague and eat ice cream at home instead.

7. What’s the best birthday you’ve ever had?
My birthdays suck. All of them (see above), however I do enjoy getting older for it's social benefits. Plus it helps make better sense of the times when I yell at the neighbor kids and then turn in for a nice 3pm nap.

If you wanna talk about birthdays, go visit Lisa and join up!

Tutu Dress Fairy

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Sat, 09 Oct 2010 06:54:00 +0000

I did finally decide for sure and for certain that Baby Bug is going to be a fairy this Halloween-the only problem was that I didn't want her to be dressed as Princess Fairy McSlutSlut, which seemed to be the only available option at our local store. Seriously-I don't care how cool it is, I am not putting my toddler in a dress that is super tight on top and only comes half way down her thigh-she can wait until she's sixteen to dress up like that for Halloween, just like I did.

So rather than go the premade slut-o-vision version of fairy-ness, I decided to make her a fairy dress from scratch. There were a lot of good patterns and options out there, but none of them were unique enough (or easy enough) until I found directions for a no sew tutu.

I didn't want to go for the straight up tutu because I knew that it would be difficult to tell if she was a ballerina or a fairy so I made my own version-a longer tutu dress! It is a halter dress, which she will be wearing with tights and a leotard underneath to stay warm (because the dress has no sleeves and is sheer). I put flowers at the top and throughout the skirt, added a little bit of ribbon, and voila!

Baby Bug's Garden Fairy Halloween Costume
[As made by a not-terribly-crafty-mom in about 2 hours]

Adorable, right? I am so proud of myself!! Of course, now I am feeling a bit of Mommy guilt over the fact that Monkey and The Bean both have store bought costumes while Baby Bug's were hand made, but I guess there is always next year. What are your kids going to be for Halloween? Do you make or buy costumes?

I Wanna Talk About...Fall

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Mon, 04 Oct 2010 07:00:00 +0000

Don't you just love Fall? It is definitely my favorite season (tied with Spring)...as opposed to my un-favorite seasons Winter and Summer. What can I say, I'm not one for extremes. Unless you count the fact that I am extremely excited that it is Fall. That's why it's so cool that my friend Lisa's meme this week is all about Fall. Hop on over and have a visit for "I Wanna Talk About Me" day!

1. What is your favorite Fall scent?
Warm rain in the afternoon. It smells so fresh!

2. Pies: Pumpkin or Apple?
Pecan. Sorry, but it's not Fall (or Thanksgiving) until I have a warm pecan pie with a scoop of vanilla ice cream on top.

3. Do you separate your summer and winter clothes? If so, have you put away your summer clothes yet?
No. Up here in the NW the weather doesn't change enough to truly warrant putting clothes away and taking them out all over again.

4. Do you decorate your house for Fall?
Yes! The kids collect leaves and we will make a little centerpiece, we paint pumpkins, make caramel apples (which are extremely decorative for about 24 hours), have candy dishes filled with candy corn...aaaaaaaaaah Fall.

5. What are you looking forward to most this Fall?
Carving pumpkins. We are planning on going to the pumpkin patch next weekend, which is going to be a blast, then we are all going to carve it up. Okay, so the kidlets will be painting little pumpkins and Hubby and I will be carving, but either way it'll be a blast.

6. Halloween is coming up! What are you (and your kids, if applicable) dressing up as for Halloween?
Monkey is definitely Spiderman. He even got the suit with the fake muscles in it and everything. I think Baby Bug is going to go as a fairy, but I'm not sure. I have no idea what to have the Bean as....maybe some kind of bug (bee, butterfly, ladybug)? I've been way too busy to plan that much yet (bad mommy. bad.)

7. Just Lisa’s birthday is this Fall! What are you getting her?
How about we trade comments? My birthday is on November 20th! It's so funny that you are going to be 29, because I'm going to be 25-we're basically the same age (and always will be, seeing as I too will cease aging at 29)!

Sunday Ten Spot: Crazy Mom Says

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Sun, 03 Oct 2010 20:57:00 +0000

You know how sometimes you say things to your kids and then you think...'I. CANNOT. BELIEVE. I. JUST. SAID. THAT!'? I end up laughing at myself so often, I thought it would be nice to give you a chance to laugh at me too. So here it is...the ten craziest things I've said to my kids this week (in no particular order).

(To Baby Bug) Get my foot out of your mouth.

(To Baby Bug) You are going to choke on that headband.

(To The Bean) Kitty poop is NOT A TOY!!!

(To Baby Bug) Yes, that [etching in poop she smeared on the wall] does look like mommy. Now wash it off.

(To Monkey) You can't marry mommy...why? Because it's incestuous, and I'm already married to daddy.

(To Monkey) Apples don't feel pain when I skewer them, but your sister does.

(To Monkey) Because teddy bears are not anatomically correct, that's why.

(To The Bean) Just because it smells like bubble gum doesn't mean it tastes like it.

(To Baby Bug) Stop wiping your butt on your bed.

(General Announcement to all Children) It's like Mommy's computer has a speeeeeecial kind of leprosy which makes it so that if anyone under 18 touches it their hands fall off.

Snurfle-Flurfle

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Sun, 26 Sep 2010 05:52:00 +0000

I am having a blogger crisis. Try as I might, I could not think of a single thing to post about in the last four(ish) days. To tell the truth, I still can't, but I really don't want to check out on my blog again like I did last quarter.

Sooooo...anybody want to read an essay on the relationship between the current anti-incumbency/anti-establishment movement and descriptive representation during the midterm elections, a memoir-style writing about a green skittle which highlights the impact of personal perspective on happiness, or perhaps a paper on the legacy of Socrates and the effect of ancient philosophers on the concepts of God and the origins of the universe? If not, I don't know exactly what I have to offer you right now because that is all I have been writing about...and if you do want to read about those things, may I suggest your local community college. They're obviously keeping me busy.

I think there is just a certain point when your brain stops working. It just looks at you skeptically, shakes its lobes exasperatedly, and refuses to budge another inch. After that it just keeps thinking flurfle-gurfle-snurfle-burfle until, after much caffeine and a few hours of nothingness, it has recuperated.

Or maybe my brain has defected after years of sleep deprivation and over-multi-tasking.

I'm sure it will return soon-it has never abandoned me for long-but until then this is what you get. Some rambling.....a blog about nothing......and oooooooh look! A kitty!

Our cat Princess Pepperdoodle Von Yum Yum this summer, right after we got her.

P.Von Yum Yum now, giving her queenly kitty look of death.

I Love Small Town, USA

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Wed, 22 Sep 2010 04:09:00 +0000

Millions of people spend their whole lives trying to get out of a small town, but I am just happy to have finally gotten in. While some people feel trapped by the small town embrace, I snuggle into it like a big bear hug and tonight reminded me once again of why.

I went to the store tonight after the kids went to bed (like I usually do-I am not the brave mom who brings 3 kids 6 and under into a store) and got in line with my usual checker. That's right-I have a usual checker. Her name is Allison and her husband's name is Paul*. They work opposite shifts [he works days and she works nights] so they rarely see each other, but they still have movie nights once a week when Shawna has the night off-they take turns picking movies and snacks. Shawna and I see each other at least three times a week, so when I got to the front of the line our conversation went like this....

"Hey Allison, how was your vacation?"

"It was really great. You know how much I miss Paul and we got to spend some real quality time together. I really didn't want to come back but you know how it is..."

"Money rules all...ha ha ha."

"Don't I know it. Anyway, I called Paul while he was at work this morning and told him I can't wait to see him tomorrow night, because I was supposed to have the night off, and he said 'I'll believe it when I see it'. Don't you know as soon as I came in they told me they needed me to work tomorrow night. I think he jinxed me."

"Aww, well I hope you get a night off soon."

"I see you're busy with school," she said, indicating the many frozen meals in my cart, "how is your Chinese class going?"

"I had to drop it because I couldn't afford the books and the teacher tried to teach ONLY by immersion."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that."

"Yeah, but I think I can pick up a philosophy class with the same professor I had last quarter."

"Well that's good-you mentioned he was really nice. How is [Hubby] doing in his first quarter?"

"Good so far, even though we're only two days in. He's really enjoying it."

"That's so good-does he still want to do engineering?"

"He's considering doing some kind of theoretical science thing, so I'm not sure, but he has a while to decide."

"Theoretical science sounds like it might be right up his alley."

"I know, that's what I thought."

Yes, my check out lady knows my husband well enough to know what is up his alley...because in a small town everyone is a real person. Your grocery checker is not just some anonymous auto-matron who you mumble at while they spew highly regulated conversation at you, they are a real person with a real life that you are a little part of, and they are a little part of yours. I talk politics with Jeff*, who pumps my gas. My neighbors Todd and Sheila* and I talk about their new upstart business and my plans after college. Everywhere I go in this town I am with real people...among friends...

What is invisible and smells like carrots?

A bunny fart.

That's the joke one of the other customers in the grocery store told me saying "I think your babies oughta like that one." I've only seen him a few times in the grocery store but he knows I have three small children that I homeschool and I know that he had an aneurysm in 1988 and has gone through years of therapy to be able to talk as well as he does and also that he has a 10 year old granddaughter named Shelly*.

In a small town we all know each other's stories. When somebody laughs, when somebody cries, their struggles and triumphs-in a small town it's more than living next to each other, we share our lives together and I can't think of anything that says 'home' more than that.

*Their names were changed because I didn't ask for permission to post them, but I really do know their actual names.

First Day of School (Again)

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Tue, 21 Sep 2010 07:09:00 +0000

Today was the first day of my second quarter and, despite only having slept for four hours due to a certain Miss Beanie Poo, I really think it went well. Today I had two of my three classes-Political Science and English Comp. I really enjoyed the classes-the teachers were nice, and very laid back, and the work load seemed very manageable...at least manageable enough (so far) for me to get my homework done before I sat down to watch all my favoritest TV shows which were premiering tonight (but more about those on another post when I'm not quite so exhausted).

Hubby had his English Comp class tonight too and he said it went pretty well...although his professor really wants him to have his books-something which is totally not happening until we get our financial aid in sometime between tomorrow and 4 weeks from now.

Le Sigh.

Anyway, despite being bookless I think we both can be successful. It's just going to be a lot of hard work, and that's nothing new around here. I hope you all had pleasant Mondays-as for me, I'm going to be crashing now. I have to be up again in 7 hours to make my way to my first Chinese class!

I Wanna Talk About....Marriage

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 19:01:00 +0000

This week's "I Want to Talk About Me" is all about Marriage and Husbands. Hop on over to my friend Lisa's and join up!

1. Are you married? If so, how long?
Our next wedding anniversary will be our 4th, but we will celebrate 8 years together November 7th, on our real anniversary. I think I deserve credit for the first 5 years of our relationship when we fell in love, lived together, worked hard, and had a baby together...don't you?

2. In your current (or last) relationship, who used the L word first?
Hubby told me he thought he was falling in love with me on our very first date. Of course I was already thinking it the moment I saw him so I said it back and it's been true ever since.

3. What is your ultimate romantic date?
I don't think I even know anymore. We've only been on two official dates in 6 years! We used to love going to the beach and walking through all the little shops on the coast. Especially the antique book stores and ice cream shops. Then we would just walk the beach for hours. That was nice. It also always ended in sex...which is also nice.

4. Weddings: traditional or elope to Vegas?
For us? Elope, elope, a thousand times elope. We did (although not to Vegas) and we are SO GLAD. No family drama, no huge bill, no anxiety that something will go wrong. We got married in a gazebo at the park and it was great. Some people want the big flouncy wedding and their whole family there and I think those weddings are a lot of fun to go to (as a guest) but I was just not interested in having one.

5. For the married/engaged ladies: did you have a say in your engagement or wedding ring?
I bought it myself! We aren't very traditional (obviously) so when we finally decided to get officially legally married I just went to the store and picked the ring I liked.

6. What first attracts you to the opposite sex?
Physically it's always the eyes first, then smile, then arms. Emotionally it's all about stability and patience. And he's got to be on top of his mental game before I would even consider looking twice. I'm so glad I found Hubby-he has an extra heaping dose of hotness, patience, and smartness.

7. Do you believe in living with someone before marrying them? What about pre-martial sex?
I think that's up to each couple. Hubby and I were together for 4.5 years and lived together for 3 years before we got married and I think it worked great for us because we have the strongest, happiest marriage we know. Some people don't want to do it that way and that's cool too...to each their own...but I think that living together and having sex before marriage (if approached with sincerity and respect) can have certain benefits as well.

8. What do you get for the husband who has everything???
XBox Live points [although I suppose you'd have to get him an XBox first if he didn't have one] and sexual favors are appropriate for any occasion.

Sunday Ten Spot: Quotes from Homeschoolers

noreply@blogger.com (MrsM) — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 08:57:00 +0000

It's September, and even though our kidlets are homeschooled year round I still think of September as back to school season (maybe it's all the commercials). So, in celebration of homeschooling during the school-iest time of the year, here are some quotes from famous people you may not have known were educated (in whole or part) outside of the system....

"There are no rules here - we're trying to accomplish something."-Thomas Edison [Homeschool graduate]

"Don't let schooling interfere with your education." - Mark Twain [Self-educated after age 11]

"Ah! There is nothing like staying at home, for real comfort." - Jane Austen [Homeschooled by her father and brothers]

"I don't like obvious things." - Reid Barton [Homeschooled since 3rd grade; four time gold medal winner at the International Mathematical Olympiad, winner of the Morgan Prize]

"The noblest pleasure is the joy of understanding." - Leonardo da Vinci [Self-educated]

"We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid." - Ben Franklin [Only had 2 years of formal schooling]

"Thank goodness I was never sent to school; it would have rubbed off some of the originality." - Beatrix Potter [Educated by her governess]

"I could trust a fact and always cross-question an assertion." - Michael Faraday [Electrochemist, primarily self taught]

"One of the luckiest things that can happen to you in life is, I think, to have a happy childhood." - Agatha Christie [Homeschooled by her mother]

"In wisdom gathered over time I have found that every experience is a form of exploration." - Ansel Adams [Homeschooled after age 12]