Jake's shared items in Google Reader

Michael Jordan Loves Chicago Almost As Much As He Loves Nike [Chicago]

2009-05-26T18:15:14Z

An animatronic Jordan doll donned a Blackhawks jersey at the United Center this weekend, to show his support for the "hometown" boys—but not before he had team officials sew a red patch over the Reebok logo. Nothing to see here, Mr. Knight! [Puck Daddy]

Chickolith: Rachel Weisz

2009-05-26T17:20:17Z

You can keep your Kate Beckinsales, and I want no part of your Keira Knightleys: the only cute-as-a-button British actress for me is Rachel Weisz. Okay, maybe I was being hasty. I’ll have a small slice of the first two, but where it comes to Rachel Weisz, I’ll take the whole fucking pie. With whipped cream. Metaphorically.

I can’t imagine what grounds you would have to objecting to her induction to the Chickolith pantheon, but if you do, I challenge you to watch that scantily-clad knife fight from The Mummy Returns and not go at least half-mast. I challenge you! Rachel is one of those girls who hasn’t quite broken through to the A-list despite the fact that you’ve seen in a million high profile or big budget movies. You know, movies like Constanine, Confidence, Fred Claus, Eragon… ok, her filmography is not the point. The point is she’s adorable and has bold but appealing eyebrows, sometimes strong and sometimes vulnerable lips, and a terrific body, okay? And she won and Oscar or whatever once, I guess.

So while you’re out watching Angels & Demons or Star Trek for the sixth time or Old The Legend of Zelda cartoons streamed on Netflix over a bowl of cereal you keep refilling, I will be watching Rachel’s latest film, The Brothers Bloom. I won’t be watching it for the plot or the tour-de-force performances, I’ll be collecting clues that will aid me in stealing her from Darren Aronofsky. Oh, and if you’re reading this, Rachel, I’ve got the ReddiWhip if you’ve got your costume from The Mummy Returns that is so very reminiscent of the Slave Leia costume. Or even if you don’t.

Bonus Quote of the Day

2009-05-16T21:48:35Z

"Keep your friends close and your enemies in China."

-- GOP strategist Mark McKinnon, quoted by Politico, on the appointment of Utah Gov. Jon Huntsman (R) to be ambassador to China.

Backyard Tire Fire: 2009 Tour Dates, Festivals

2009-05-09T00:53:08Z

Backyard Tire Fire, the boys from Bloomington, IL, are heading out on the road this summer right after they finish a local residency in their hometown. I’ll always plug this band given how close I was to them as they were coming up musically. Their drummer used to serve me pizza slices regularly while I was in college (I believe it was called Jake’s Pizza), and I used to go see Brother Jed, Ed Andersen’s first band, at the infamous Illinois State University Lacrosse House. If you’ve been there, you’re instantly my new best friend.

Go check them out in support of their latest release, The Places We Lived.

Backyard Tire Fire Tour Dates

May 14 Coconut Louie’s Bloomington, IL An Evening With!
May 15 Blueberry Hill St. Louis, MO w/ Cracker
May 17 3rd & Lindsley Nashville, TN w/ Cracker - listen live on WRLT.com!
May 21 Coconut Louie’s Bloomington, IL An Evening With!
May 22 Chord on Blues St. Charles, IL w/ Dave Ramont
May 24 Summercamp Festival Chillicothe, IL w/ Los Lobos, Willie Nelson, Umphrey’s McGee, Chicago Farmer, and many more!
May 27 Mercury Lounge New York, NY w/ Hill Country Review
May 28 Sellersville Theater Sellersville, PA w/ Cracker
May 29 Black Cat Washington, DC w/ Toadies
May 30 Appalachain Brewing Company Harrisburg, PA w/ Cracker - free show!
May 31 The National Richmond, VA w/ Cracker
June 6 Chicago Street Pub Joliet, IL An Evening With!
June 10 Newport Music Hall Columbus OH w/ Reverend Horton Heat
June 11 The Magic Bag Ferndale, MI w/ TBD
Week of June 12th Listen to us on nationally syndicated Mountain Stage Your Radio Check broadcast schedule
June 12 House of Blues Cleveland, OH w/ Reverend Horton Heat
June 13 Intersection Grand Rapids, MI w/ Reverend Horton Heat
June 14 Canal Street Tavern Dayton, OH w/ Reverend Horton Heat
June 15 Bluebird Nightclub Bloomington, IN w/ Reverend Horton Heat
June 17 Rhythm & Brews Chattanooga, TN w/ Reverend Horton Heat
June 18 Crossroads Music Hall Huntsville, AL w/ Reverend Horton Heat
June 19 House of Blues New Orleans, LA w/ Reverend Horton Heat
June 20 House of Blues Houston, TX w/ Reverend Horton Heat
June 21 The Door - Prophet Bar Dallas, TX w/ Chuck Ragan
June 22 The Blue Door Oklahoma City, OK w/ Mark Bilyeu
June 23 George’s Majestic Fayetteville, AR w/ Mark Bilyeu
June 24 Lindberg’s Springfield, MO w/ Mark Bilyeu
June 26 Paddlefest - sponsored by WNKU Cincinnati, OH BTF headlines also w/ Rumpke Mountain Boys and more!
June 27 Tall Tree Festival Goreville, IL w/ 56 Hope Road, Rev. Peyton, Great American Taxi, Madahoochi and more
July 7 CEFCU Centerstage on the Landing Peoria, IL w/ Gov’t Mule
July 10 Simon Estes Amphitheater Des Moines, IA w/ Gov’t Mule
July 12 Forecastle Festival Louisville, KY w/ Widespread Panic, Black Crowes, Black Keys , Avett Brothers and more!
July 14 The Crossroads Kansas City, MO w/ Gov’t Mule
July 24 10,000 Lakes Festival Detroit Lakes, MN w/ Wilco, Widespread Panic, Trampled by Turtles, William Elliot Whitmore, Joe Pug and more!
September 19 Carbondale Main St. Pig Out Carbondale, IL BTF headlines Saturday night!

The Onion: Shirtless Biden Washes Trans Am In White House Driveway [LOLCars]

2009-05-06T18:00:00Z

But really, the only reason this Joe Biden-Trans Am joke's funny is because it could totally be true. [The Onion]

Flourless Peanut Butter Cookies

2009-04-22T00:55:09Z

This I Used To Believe

I believed that if I wore a stretched out paperclip across my front teeth I would be one of the cool kids with a retainer. It turns our that retainers only seem cool when you don’t actually have to wear one.

I believed that if I sunk down in my chair low enough in Honors Algebra, I wouldn’t be called on the answer questions that I didn’t have answers to. I didn’t have answers to any… aaany of the questions. In reality, that posture was like a giant, neon, blinking arrow pointed right in my direction.

I believed that if I stayed up all night chewing gum, I was bound to get the part of Violet Beauregarde in the sixth grade performance of Charlie and The Chocolate Factory. That part went to my best friend Lindsay. What does it say about me if I still think about that from time to time?

I believed that Dylan would never leave Brenda on Beverly Hills, 90210. Um… remember what happened in the pool? With Kelly!? Brenda’s best friend!? Yea… so that didn’t work out.

I believed that really good cookies simply had to have at least a few cups of all-purpose flour flour in them. These Flourless Peanut Butter Cookies changed my mind. Seriously. I know you’re thinking They’re better than you think. Way way better. These are great!

This post was inspired by last weeks episode of This American Life which, in turn, was inspired by the international essay project, This I Believe. Yaaaaay for public radio!

Believe me when I say that these cookies will surprise you. They’re exactly everything I wanted from a peanut butter cookie, without the flour. With only four ingredients (5 if you add the chocolate) I had perfectly chewy and flavorful peanut butter cookies on my table. With a glass of cold milk… my goodness… swoon! Trust me. Try them!

These cookies aren’t the type that you throw in your purse for an afternoon snack. Because they don’t have flour, they’re just a bit more delicate. If you use all-natural peanut butter, you’re cookies will hold up a bit better than if you use the fake stuff. K?

Flourless Peanut Butter Cookies

The Gourmet Cookbook

makes about two dozen cookies

1 cup all-natural chunky or smooth peanut butter

1 cup sugar (1/2 cup brown sugar and 1/2 cup granulated sugar)

1 egg

1 teaspoon baking soda

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Grease a baking sheet with butter and set aside. In a mixer combine peanut butter and sugars until well combined, about 2 minutes. Add egg and baking soda and mix for another 2 minutes. Roll into walnut sized balls and create a cris-cross pattern with a fork. If you’d like, add a few chocolate pieces to the top of the cookies. Bake for 10 minutes, until lightly browned. Cool on a baking sheet for two minutes, then transfer to… your mouth.

Colorado DMV Misinterprets Tofu-loving Vegan Vanity Plate [LOLCars]

2009-04-13T14:00:00Z

The Colorado DMV appears to have misinterpreted a seemingly harmless vanity plate request from a proud vegan driver. That is, unless you have a filthy mind like ours.

CNBC's Morning Joe co-host, Mika Brzezinski, didn't seem to catch the joke here. Was it because she was a woman in a room full of "pig men" or was it simply because she's "a blonde" as ~~douchebag~~ host, Joe Scarborough, put it?

Regardless, we know there are much, much worse vanity plates out there, evidenced by our top 50 list of vanity plates that slipped by the DMV. Colorado, if you're reading, take a peak at the old post and dammit, let the crazy vegan have her silly license plate or we'll send a KNUKL your way. (Hat Tip To Thomas!)

[via MSNBC]

A Boob Grab Unlike Any Other [The Masters]

2009-04-13T14:00:14Z

It's easy to get caught up in the emotion of Sunday at The Masters, but few fans have the determination to use that frenzy to their advantage and sneak in a boob grope at 15.

Yes, August National Golf Club is supposed to be a hallowed and reserved place, but when Tiger Woods sticks an approach shot, everyone gets in the mood to stick something. There isn't really a better aphrodisiac than a Woods-Mickelson pairing rallying from behind—so who wouldn't get a little randy in the gallery? Even Hootie Johnson approves.

Oh, and some fat guy from another country won the whole shebang in a three-way playoff, but I doubt anyone will remember that. Except maybe the other guy who bogeyed 17 and 18 when a par on either would have won it. He might remember that one for awhile.

Tiger Woods, Phil Mickelson proved Augusta spark plugs [ESPN]
Perry shows grace, but late blunders again have to hurt [USA Today]
Cabrera's Win, Woods-Mickelson Duel Brings Life Back to Masters [Bloomberg]
Tossing Batting Practice
Angel Cabrera Is Your Master [Rumors and Rants]

Comic for April 9, 2009

2009-04-09T07:00:00Z

Soccer Player Receives Yellow Card For Farting [Soccer]

2009-04-06T15:15:29Z

A Chorlton Villa footballer "broke wind" during a penalty kick and received a yellow card for his efforts. (And the other team got a re-kick.) When did they change the "he who smelt it" rule? [BBC]

Free Wallpaper Images to Spice up Your Desktop

2009-03-30T23:01:17Z

Are you a fan of the photographs in the Patagonia catalogs? If so, here's a digital treat to make your Monday all the better. Head over to Patagonia.com and visit our new wallpaper page. There you'll find 13 stunning images available as free downloads for your desktop. Each image comes in two sizes so you can best match you monitor, just right-click to save. Here's a sample:

[Right-click to download: 1280x1024 or 1024x768. Photo: Janine Patitucci]

Visit the Patagonia Wallpaper page to view and download all 13 images.

Today's post is dedicated to the Patagonia Photo Team and all the amazing photographers who've contributed to Patagonia over the years. Thank you for sharing your visions and for inspiring each of us to get out there and get on it.

Quote of the Day

2009-03-23T04:02:57Z

"Axelrod really wanted me to do this on teleprompter -- but I told him I'm much better when I wing it."

-- Vice President Biden, at the Gridiron Club dinner. The AP has more.

Obama Approval Takes Small Dip

2009-03-20T15:19:43Z

A new American Research Group poll finds that 56% of Americans say they approve of the way Barack Obama is handling his job as president and 37% disapprove. Obama's approval is down slightly from last month.

Key finding: Independents are now split on overall approval -- 47% approve and 46% disapprove.

Lobbyists Find Their Way Into Administration

2009-03-20T17:16:52Z

The National Journal found that of 267 top Obama administration nominees and appointees at least 30 -- or about 11% -- have been registered lobbyists at some point during the past five years -- despite Obama's campaign pledge not to employ lobbyists in his administration.

Obama Signed Book Deal Just Before Taking Office

2009-03-19T12:13:22Z

Just a few days before being sworn in, President Obama signed a children's book deal that came with a $500,000 advance, the Washington Times reports.

"Analysts say there don't appear to be any rules that would bar such transactions after a president takes office, but it's unclear whether an incoming or sitting president has ever signed a book deal upon entering the White House."

The project calls for an abridged version of his book Dreams From My Father for middle-school-aged children.

Disclosures released yesterday show Obama made $2.5 million last year from book royalties.

Illini players improve 40 times at pro day

2009-03-18T21:42:22Z

Posted by ESPN.com's Adam Rittenberg

Illinois held its annual pro timing day on Wednesday, and eight players participated in drills witnessed by 28 NFL scouts.

It was a good day for the Davises, Vontae and Will, both of whom improved their 40-yard dash times from the NFL combine. Cornerback Vontae Davis ran a blistering 4.35 in the 40, which could boost his draft stock, while defensive end Will Davis ran a 4.83.

Wide receiver Will Judson ran a 4.31 40 on his first attempt, and linebacker Brit Miller, a first-team All-Big Ten selection last year, twice ran a 4.56.

Complete results from pro day will be posted later today on the team's official Web site.

An interesting nugget: former Illinois running back Walter Mendenhall, who transferred to Illinois State, attended Illinois' pro timing day. Mendenhall's younger brother, Rashard, the 2007 Big Ten Offensive Player of the Year at Illinois, lashed out at the program last summer, though he said it didn't have much to do with Illinois' treatment of Walter.

Comic for March 19, 2009

2009-03-19T07:00:00Z

March madness Productivity Loss

2009-03-19T12:21:45Z

Tuesday marked the official opening of March Madness with the debut game between Morehead State and Alabama State. It also saw the opening games in the NIT as well as two other tournaments beginning with the letter "C" that I don't know what the initials stand for nor do I particularly care. One runner-up tournament is enough for me.

Today is the real opening of the tournament with games starting at noon. How many of you are planning to take extended lunch breaks to watch all or most the noon games or maybe even the entire afternoon slate. I know that when I was still working in an office, I never had as many fellow workers come to visit as I did on the first two days of the tournament since I had a TV in my office.

There are ridiculous numbers thrown around that purport to measure the productivity loss attributable to the NCAA tournament. One of the most fanciful is $3.8 billion contained in a press release by John A. Challenger, CEO of Challenger, Gray & Christmas. As noted by Jack Shafer in Slate, this figure was reported by a long list of newspapers, many of whom won't be publishing print editions by the time that the next edition of March Madness rolls around, but that is a story for a different post. Shafer goes on to so an excellent job of skewering Challenger's numbers and I commend the article to you.

Friday Funnies

2009-03-13T04:52:04Z

closing the book

2009-03-17T15:16:53Z

My esteemed colleague David Jacobs on reading with the iPhone Kindle app.

I have one major complaint: I found the act of finishing the book unsatisfying; after paging through 4393 "locations" (the Kindle doesn't entertain the conceit of page numbers) I missed the satisfaction of closing the volume one final time. The application resisted my impotent flicks, always returning to the final page.