Jeannine Jersey

Back to Basics

2012-02-23T09:32:00.003-08:00

A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to get caught up with one of my favorite cousins - who told me that she subscribed to this blog back when I was "just" posting gratitude lists, as a reminder to be more grateful in her own life...which reminded ME that I have completely gotten out of the habit of doing daily/weekly/even monthly lists!

So, to get back to basics, today's post is all about gratitude! My life is pretty awesome (even when I am struggling with morning sickness...all day...), and doing a gratitude list is a great way to pause and take stock of that. It also encourages me to go through my day looking for reasons to be grateful, which is a fun way to travel through a day.

Today, I am grateful for:
- Being pregnant - I've always wanted to be a mom, and even though I don't feel so hot right this second, I know it's a HUGE blessing to be able to experience this, with a man that I love so much.
- A pending visit from a very dear friend this weekend - she always lifts my spirits and we always have fun together! I can't wait!
- Modern medicine - S has the flu (YUCK!), but I don't have to get it because my doctor called us in a prescription for him to feel better, and for me to avoid getting it at all!
- Red Diamond Salsa - I have been looking for YEARS for a salsa that I could buy at the grocery store to replace a kind that went off the market (that was my favorite), and I have been craving good salsa like crazy.
- Washer/Dryer in the house - I have, at least, 7 loads to do today and it would suck to have to tote it somewhere else to get it down. I am not looking forward to washing and folding it all - but at least, I don't have to travel to do it!

Dear God, thanks for the nudge to get back to being grateful. I know that life is good - and that if I open my eyes, there are blessings all around. Please be with M and M's family after the loss of his father. Please grant healing to B and S, who are struggling with bad backs. Please help my beloved S recuperate from the flu. Keep a watchful eye on all of my friends and family - keep them safe and comforted, and show me how I can be of service to them, if You so choose. Amen.

How to end a pregnancy meltdown - FAST!

2012-02-14T06:14:00.005-08:00

Yesterday, pregnancy hormones got the best of me. I swear I was possessed by an alien or something. I literally just didn't feel like myself - words were coming out of my mouth that didn't sound like me, tears were coming out of my eyes for no reason. It was BIZARRE! Poor S...he bore the brunt of it.

Here's the breakdown of my breakdown:

J: (walking into S's home office to see if he's done working for the day) You almost done? What are we having for dinner?

S: Whatever you want. I'll be done in a little bit. (changing the subject) So, tomorrow's Valentine's Day, right? And we aren't doing presents for each other, right?

J: (smiling) That's right! Just cards - no presents. Our trip to Vegas is going to be our present to each other.

S: (looking relieved) OK, great. Just cards and tokens of affection.

{needle scratching across the record}

J: Tokens of affection?? What does that mean? Tokens of affection means you bought a present!! (panic setting in) We said no presents!!

S: Not a present. Just a little something to show you I love you.

J: (hysteria setting in) But I love you, and I didn't get you a present, and now you won't think I love you, because we said no presents, and I wanted to stick to that so you wouldn't be mad at me, and now, I am the worst wife ever because I didn't get a you a Valentine's Day present, and it's our first married Valentine's Day together, and I thought that's what I was supposed to do, but I should have known that didn't really mean nothing, and now, I don't have anything for you except the cards I got you, and that isn't enough to show you how much I love you, and I am sorry that you got stuck with such a bad wife, and now, you are stuck with me forever, and I know you are sorry that you ever married me.

{S sitting in stunned silence as the tears flow from my ugly face and snot begins to form which I gracefully wipe off with shirt sleeve}

J: You need to take them back. I want us to be even, and I can't go get you something now, because you'll know when I got it, and I was going to even make you something, but I've been so tired and sick from being pregnant that I haven't had the energy, but I do really love you and wanted to do something for you, other than just a card, but we were trying to save money for our trip, and I wanted to be a good wife by sticking to our budget.

S: Baby, baby - you need to calm down. Come here. It's ok. (attempt at a hug)

J: It's not ok. It'll never BE ok. You are going to leave me because I am a bad wife, and I am going to miss you so much. You are the best thing that ever happened to me, and I am doing a terrible job of showing you....

S: Sweetheart, it's ok. It's just a little something. Nothing big. I swear. It's not a big deal. Nothing to get upset about.

J: (realizing she's gotten S's shirt wet with tears...and probably snot) I can't help it. How little? If it's anything, it's more than what I did!

S: Just a little something.

J: How little? What is it?

S: You really want me to tell you?

J: Yes! I want to know how much I suck for not getting YOU anything.

S: OK - just some flowers, and a balloon ...and some chocolate.

J: (Brightening) Chocolate? I like chocolate....

{Meltdown over...}

Best parenting advice I've gotten so far - and it's from a GUY!

2012-02-02T06:56:00.000-08:00

Ever since I started to tell people that we are expecting, we have been inundated with parenting advice - some of it good, some of it...well, a little militant. I know that everyone has the best of intentions, so I have been taking it in stride, trying to remember that I may need their experiences some day.

So far, however, the best advice I have gotten was from my friend, Keith - read below:

It's so awesome being a parent, although it really does change your life in so many ways that you can't even fathom beforehand.

The one piece of advice I will give is this — everyone will get all up in your grill with their own parenting advice... this worked for me, that doesn't work, that will give your baby the Ebola virus so never do it, this is the only way to get your baby to [insert verb here], etc. Everyone has their own (sometimes very strong opinions) about what works and what doesn't, but every baby is different and responds differently to everything. What works for one person may not work for another. Just take in everything so you have options to try when things happen, but don't be intimidated when other parents declare their solution is the be-all and end-all of solutions and you better take it to heart — because it's nice to know it works for one baby in case the advice someone else gave you doesn't pan out and you need to try something new, but it might not be the solution you need. For example, during Max's first few months, the only way we could always assuredly get to him to fall asleep was when I held him and rocked him to sleep while playing rock music — anything with a good amount of electric guitar in it was soothing to him. I seriously doubt that would work for the majority of other parents, but it was a surefire method for us.

Also, my wife says that the first week is pretty smooth because babies tend to sleep a lot after they get home from the hospital so you get lulled into a false sense of security and think "this is easy, I don't know why everyone says it's so hard." Then the next few weeks kick in and they wake up every 2 hours and need to be fed and need constant attention, and you enter what my wife refers to as "the Dark Times" when you feel like you made a mistake and what did you get yourself into and this is the most horrible experience ever and you're SO TIRED all the time. That too shall pass eventually, but it's always good to have other moms around who are going through the same thing as you so you can commiserate and also so you have someone to text at 4am when your kid's awake.

That's my $0.02, for what it's worth. But it's such a great thing to have a little one, and I'm so happy for you & Steven! I can't even begin to tell you how much I love it when Max comes home from daycare and breaks into a huge smile when he sees me... that is truly the best part of my day.

I am so lucky to have smart, sweet men in my life that are willing to share!

So, do you agree with Keith - or not so much?

Please support St. Anne's Home on Alabama Gives Day!

2012-02-01T17:49:00.000-08:00

It's here! Alabama Gives Day is finally here! Today, thousands of area residents are going to show their support for their favorite nonprofit during Alabama Gives Day. We hope that you will make St. Anne's Home the recipient of your donation. Every donation, no matter the size, will help us further the important work of our organization.

Each day, a house full of women are getting the support they need in a safe environment to begin restoring their lives as they recover from their addiction to drugs and/or alcohol. Women are working on being reunited with their families, returning to the work force, learning new life skills, and so much more…EVERY DAY! Watching them come out of their shells and have their hope renewed is an experience that should not be missed! Each and every one of these women is truly a miracle – one that wouldn’t be possible without YOUR support.

A donation of just $12 can pay for a day’s stay for one of our residents. A donation of $87 could cover one week, and $350 would insure her ability to stay for an entire month. Think of the impact YOUR donation could have in the life of a recovering woman! YOU could be part of her miracle!

Here's how you can help:

1) Make a donation at: http://www.razoo.com/story/St-Annes-Home

2) You can make a donation by TEXT too!* Each time you text CHANGE WOMEN to 84465, it's a $10 donation!

3) Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/stanneshome and help build the buzz.

4) Spread the word! Forward this email to your family and friends along with a personal note as to why you believe in our work, and why they should give.

Help spread the excitement. Tell your friends and family why you think they should help us with their donation. Please be our champion, and help us see it to the top! We can’t wait to celebrate the difference your generosity will make!

Thanks, in advance, for your support!

*$10.00 donation to Alabama Gives Day. Charges will appear on your wireless bill, or be deducted from your prepaid balance. All purchases must be authorized by account holder. Message and Data Rates May Apply. Text STOP to 84465 to STOP. Text HELP to 84465 for HELP. Full Terms: mGive.org/T. Privacy Policy.

Big News!!

2012-01-30T05:07:00.001-08:00

S and I are excited to annouce that we are expecting! We're so excited! It really is a dream come true for both of us - and we are overjoyed that God has blessed us this way.

Our due date is September 3rd - Labor Day, appropriately! (Does God have a sense of humor of what??) That means that as of today, I am 9 weeks along.

Our little bundle of joy is about the size of a prune today, but not nearly as wrinkled! He or she is really starting to take shape - bones and cartilage are forming, and small indentations on the legs are becoming knees and ankles. The arms, complete with elbows, can flex already! Plus, the tooth bud fairy has arrived and his or her little teeth are forming too!

As of now, we aren't planning on finding out the gender of the baby - all we want is a happy, healthy baby, and the gender truly won't matter. Plus, it'll be an exciting surprise for Steven to announce to our gathered family after Baby arrives!

How am I feeling? Well - not so hot. I have been experiencing the fabulous rite of passage known as morning sickness...or as I have come to know it, all day and night sickness. It's more of a lingering nausea than actual sickness, coupled with exhaustion like I have never known (which is saying a lot since I get up so early for work!).

That being said, I wouldn't trade it for the world. Anyone that knows me knows that I've wanted to be a mom for my entire life, and I just know that S is going to be a fantastic father. We are truly blessed and couldn't wait to share this with you!

Can you imagine a world where every woman has a safe place to go for recovery?

2012-01-24T19:48:00.000-08:00

I woke up really excited this morning. While I’m always passionate about the work I do here at St. Anne’s Home, there's something else that's got me pumped.

On February 2nd, 2012, thousands of area residents are going to show their support for their favorite nonprofit during Alabama Gives Day. On that day, every donation will help us further the important work of our organization.

Every day, a house full of women are getting the support they need in a safe environment to begin restoring their lives as they recover from their addiction to drugs and/or alcohol. Women are working on being reunited with their families, returning to the work force, learning new life skills, and so much more…EVERY DAY! Watching them come out of their shells and have their hope renewed is an experience that should not be missed! Each and every one of these women is truly a miracle – one that wouldn’t be possible without YOUR support.

What really has me excited is that this is going to be a big event, and everyone will be talking about who they’re supporting. Think “American Idol” and we're in the try-outs but need your support to make it to the top.

We need you to help us with these three things:

1) Mark February 2nd, 2012 on your calendar and add this giving link. http://www.razoo.com/story/St-Annes-Home

2) Follow us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/stanneshome and help build the buzz.

3) Spread the word! Forward this email to your family and friends along with a personal note as to why you believe in our work, and why they should give on February 2nd, 2012.

We are ok...

2012-01-23T05:51:00.000-08:00

It's an eerie morning here in Alabama. We were woken up in the wee hours of the morning by severe weather and deafening thunder. There had been reports of a pending potential tornado in our area for the overnight last night - and after the devastation of last April's tornadoes, everyone in these parts is more than a little edgy when they mention that there is even a chance of them.

As the sun has come up, the images of the destruction are coming in, and it breaks my heart. Even when we know it's coming, there's nothing we can do to stop or prevent a tornado. The best we can do is hunker down or get out of the way.

As for us and our family, we are alright. Our homes are alright. Every friend that I have is alright. This leaves me feeling incredibly blessed and grateful, especially after seeing and hearing about how many people are NOT in the same situation.

This morning, on the air, we've just been trying to disseminate the information as it comes in - the death toll, started at 1, rose to 2, rose to 3 - and hundreds are injured or displaced because of their homes being destroyed. So many families changed forever in the blink of an eye. Lots of people calling to get information because they can't get through to their families or places of business.

So, this morning, they are all in my prayers - and I hope they'll be in yours, too.

Bathtime is no fun

2012-01-22T14:55:00.001-08:00

I'm not sure why I have never let it sink in that I am just not a "bath" kind of a girl. In theory, it seems like a lovely idea - especially, when my adorable, loving husband S sets it up the way he does, complete with candles, music and rose petals (he really is too good to be true, sometimes...).

I haven't felt particularly well today, so I thought it might be a nice way to relax and feel better. He had run off to the store to get everything he was going to need to make us some dinner (I told you he's too good to be true!), and I had the house to myself. I ran the water, put the bath salts in, and arranged a towel for a pillow for my head.

When I tried to settle myself in, I remembered why I don't like baths. I am too tall. There's nothing relaxing about laying half in the water, and half out. Every few minutes, half of me would get cold, so I would have to switch halves. I'd have to have to fold in very unnatural ways to even fit half of me under the water, so I never really got comfortable, even for a minute.

Yet, I sat there for 30 minutes - trying to make myself enjoy it. Why? Because I feel like I "should". I do that to myself a lot. I feel like I "should" enjoy something, and then, make myself feel badly for not liking it. What a waste of time! I spent 30 minutes today, miserable...ON PURPOSE. I chose that. How silly is that?

I am going to try to be more honest with myself about what I enjoy and what I don't. It's not like anyone had a gun to my head telling me that I had to take a bath and like it. I put all that on myself. No one else cares if I ever take a bath again. Obviously, they will care if I don't bathe...but that's not going to be an issue, I promise!

Lesson learned. It was worth 30 minutes of unrelaxing bath to learn that lesson today!

Gratitude list for January 19, 2012

2012-01-18T19:07:00.001-08:00

Today, I feel gratitude for:
- A foot rub while watching TV tonight - who has a better husband than I do??
- cake from Olexa's in Mountain Brook - heaven in a slice
- time to catch up with two ladies I really like today
- cuddly dogs
- comfy pajama pants - best end to a long day

Dear God, thank you for all of the blessings in my life. I recognize that I am truly blessed since the things I listed are all luxury items - some times I can take for granted that my basics are covered. Since life is so good, I can get cranky over the smallest of things - please help me to keep life in perspective, especially regarding ______. Please protect my friend G and her husband as they travel abroad - and keep all of my loved ones, safe, sound and comforted. Amen.

Angel Walk

2012-01-17T14:06:00.001-08:00

Today, I was witness to a "coining out" ceremony at St. Anne's Home - and an "angel walk". It was a beautiful ceremony - one that I had never witnessed or participated in, before today. It was moving and emotional, and there were more than a few tears from the more emotional woman that took part (i.e., me). I am a volunteer and board member for St. Anne's, so the whole house holds a special place in my heart - but today was more special than most.

At St. Anne's, most women stay for about three months, as they get their lives back in order and start their recovery and rehabilitation from drugs and alcohol. It is usually the bright spot of my week when I go there on Tuesdays for our weekly sessions. Getting to see the women slowly come out of their shells and start to feel more comfortable and happy in their sober skin brings me more joy than I can imagine.

The woman that coined out today actually chose to stay at the house for an additional two months in order to complete the therapy and recovery work that she knew was crucial to her long term success in remaining sober when she returned home to her family. Since I've gotten to know her pretty well over the past five months, she asked if I would come join them for her ceremony today.

It was called an "angel walk". The residents, staff, and invited volunteers lined up in two lines, tallest to shortest, facing each other at arm's length distance apart. Then, the woman that was coining out closed her eyes and stood at the back at the lines, and waited for the two women in the back to place their hands on her shoulders, right where her wings would attach. On a boombox, they played a very inspirational, musical version of the "Serenity Prayer" - which is a prayer near and dear to the recovery community. As we each placed our "wings" on her back, we leaned in to whisper a wish or good thought in her ear, and then, gently nudged her along to the next set of women, whose hands replaced ours, as her next set of wings.

This was repeated over and over, until she had about a dozen set of wings at her back - and dozens of kind wishes and words of love whispered in her ears. The women that participated in the ceremony were truly acting as angels for her as prepared to venture out in to the real world again.

I had goosebumps - watching this woman - who came to St. Anne's, convinced life would never, could never get any better - being lifted up, encouraged and loved on by all of the other women of the house, and the staff and volunteers. She emerged at the end of the line, joyful and proud - and we all felt uplifted by the experience.

I love the imagery of having our friends and loved ones as angels with their hands as the wings we need to fly. I am so grateful that I was able to be a small part of that incredible moment in her journey today, and I will never forget it. I hope she doesn't either.

The results of the Brussels sprouts taste test

2012-01-13T06:48:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I confessed that I was very fearful of trying Brussels sprouts - and that they were, literally IN the oven as I was blogging about it.

I had received many suggestions of how to prepare them, but the simplest one was just to cut them in halves (or quarters) and roast them at 400 degrees, after tossing them with olive oil, sea salt, black pepper (and I added some minced garlic).

Here's how that adventure went:

They started out looking like this:

Then, I started to cook them.

Step 1:

Step 2:

Step 3:

And, the grand finale - the taste test:

So, see? I had nothing to worry about! They were FANTASTIC! I cut off the camera before you could witness me eating every single sprout on that pan. I didn't even bother with a bowl or plate. (Classy, I know!)

Why I am scared to eat Brussels sprouts

2012-01-12T13:58:00.000-08:00

Last week, we did a segment on the morning show about things we have never done that might surprise people. To get the ball rolling and inspire listeners to feel safe to call with their confessions, I admitted that, at the age of 35, I have never tried Brussels sprouts. Does that surprise you?

Well, it surprised our listeners, too, and over the course of the past week, I have been handed recipes that I am "guaranteed" to love during meetings, emailed recipes for roasted Brussels sprouts by the dozen, and today, I was coached by a professional chef (and the director of a culinary school) on how I could cook them in a way that wouldn't be too scary.

I've had to think a lot about why I haven't ever stepped up to the culinary plate and tried them. Here's the history: my parents HATED Brussels sprouts. They are one of the few foods that were never served in our house. (I wish they had the same stance on lima beans, but I digress...) My dad didn't like them, at all, and my mom had basically OD'd on them growing up - so they vowed never to force them on their kids and never even offered them to us. Alright, maybe it wasn't a vow, so much, as a decision - but at any rate, we never had them.

Since I never had them as a kid, and knew of my parents' aversion towards them, I was never very motivated to try them on my own. We also never had asparagus or sushi growing up, but luckily, I had friends that encouraged me to try to those foods, and coached me on how to eat them - and it was love at first bite on both counts. One might think after those positive experiences that I would chomping at the bit to chow down on some sprouts.

Nope. I am scared.

There. I said it. I am scared to eat Brussels sprouts.

I have jumped out of planes. I have spoken in front of thousands of people. I have sung the National Anthem at sporting events. I've gone on blind dates. And yet - I am sitting here, scared to try the Brussels sprouts I have roasting in the oven RIGHT THIS SECOND. Aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

I am scared that they will be so bad that I will never recover from eating them. With 35 years of time to think of how awful they will be, I am certain that they will taste so awful that I will be haunted for years by the ghost of the sprouts.

While that may seem ridiculous to you, it doesn't to me. That's usually how I feel about new things: that they will certainly be so awful that I will be haunted by the terrible experience for years and years to come. I worry that everyone will find out how awfully things went with ______, and will hate me forever for not liking it/failing. (And before you worry too much - I am not paralyzed by this...I usually can talk myself through it and try it anyway...but these are the thoughts that lead up to it.)

What I know to be true is my greatest fears almost never materialize - and when it comes to the BIG stuff like jumping out of a plane, I can usually go for it. Yet, for 35 years, I managed to avoid the sprouts.

Today, that ends. I am going for it. I will no longer fear this benign vegetable. I am roasting it in the oven, right now, and will try it. I have promised that I will report back on that tomorrow morning on our show, so my hand is kind of forced to do so. Nonetheless, today marks the end of an era in my little world, and I am pretty psyched about it.

Today, Brussels sprouts...tomorrow, who knows??

What have you been avoiding trying out of fear? Need some encouragment?

Gratitude Quickie

2012-01-11T05:57:00.001-08:00

Today, I am grateful for:
- my treadmill set up in my house - no matter what the weather is like outside, I can always go for a walk (and get caught up on TV!)
- epicurious - lots of fun recipes to try
- getting back to choir practice tonight - I have missed singing
- St. Anne's Home - the girls there make me feel useful and the staff there is doing great work with the residents
- today being a new day - I love that I have a chance at a whole different kind of day every day...just because yesterday was yucky, doesn't mean today will be!

Dear God, thank you for the many blessings in my life, and for the opportunity to stop and take stock. Please show me how to be of use to You and your kids. Amen.

So far, so good...

2012-01-10T05:52:00.000-08:00

I read a study this morning saying that 75% of people have already "fallen off the wagon" - which made me feel pretty good about myself, since I am still going strong! (That's the award I am giving myself for staying strong 10 days into the year above...)

Here's my progress report:

- Sleep more. I have been trying to go to bed earlier, and to take a nap each day - and so far, so good. I am pretty proud of this one...and reaping the benefits of feeling less cranky already.
- Use my new treadmill. I am rocking on this one. On Saturday AND Sunday, I cranked out over 4 miles each day and spent over an hour total each day on the treadmill, including warming up and cooling down. Yesterday, I "only" did 3.5 miles for 50 minutes, but that's still way over my goal!
- Show more gratitude. Hmmm...I need to remember to do this one. So far, I haven't sent any actual thank you notes. I have made an effort to say "thank you" out loud more often, but no actual notes.
- Boycott all things Kardashian, whenever possible. Totally accomplished! Moving on...
- Travel to someplace I have never been. The plans are in place! As soon as we hear, for sure, about S's new job this week, we are booking the tickets to go to Vegas!
- Eat more real food. We cooked a LOT this weekend - most of it was homemade! I even made French toast from homemade bread.
- Focus on the positive, forget about the negative. Last Friday, I was pretty cranky about a situation at work, but I remembered to focus on the positive and write a gratitude list - and it helped to turn things around!
- Blog 225 times. This is #6 for the year - so, I am chipping away at this particular goal.
- Play. This weekend, we had a blast playing with our new XBox Kinect that S's mom gave us for Christmas. We played darts, golf, and tennis. We skied. We danced. All in our PJ's! Super fun!
- Be gentle with myself. As I learned last year, some times, it's even better to NOT stick to the plan than to force my way through on resolutions or plans. So far, this year, I feel like I picked pretty reasonable resolutions, so I am sticking to them. (Which is a way of being more gentle with myself, too!)

How are you doing with YOUR resolutions? Are you in the 75%? Do you want to get back on track?

Tweaking a new recipe

2012-01-09T05:37:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I was feeling kind of domestic, so I decided to try out some new recipes - and I was really pleased with the results (and with the leftovers that I'll be enjoying today!). Sometimes, it doesn't turn out too well if I don't follow the directions exactly - but yesterday, I took a recipe I found on Pinterest (my latest obsession) - and tweaked it a little, by adding some cooked chicken into the mix at the end, and it turned out super yummy.

Ingredients

2 cups (8 oz.) dry penne pasta
8 sun-dried tomatoes, chopped (about 1/3 cup)
1 can (12 fl. oz.) NESTLÉ® CARNATION® Evaporated Lowfat 2% Milk
2 cups (8-oz. pkg.) shredded Italian-style four-cheese blend
1 teaspoon dried basil
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper

Directions

PREPARE pasta according to package directions, adding sun-dried tomatoes to boiling pasta water for last two minutes of cooking time; drain.

MEANWHILE, COMBINE evaporated milk, cheese, basil, garlic powder and pepper in medium saucepan. Cook over medium-low heat, stirring occasionally, until cheese is melted. Remove from heat.

ADD pasta and sun-dried tomatoes to cheese sauce; stir until combined.

Here's the link to the original: http://www.verybestbaking.com/recipes/143190/Penne-Pasta-with-Sun-dried-Tomato-Cream-Sauce/detail.aspx.

A begrudingly done, and specific gratitude list

2012-01-06T13:18:00.001-08:00

Originally, I started this blog as a way to be more diligent about doing gratitude lists - taking stock on the many blessings in my life. Even when I am having a bad day, if I pause and take stock of how things are really going (instead of my usual M.O., which is to catastrophize everything and focus solely on the negative), I can carve out at least five things that I feel grateful to have in my life.

Today, I found myself in a little bit of a snit over a situation where I felt like I was getting slighted at work. It's an ongoing situation, and I've tried to have a good attitude about it for a long time. However, lately, I just feel like it's piled up to the point where I can't help but take it personally (despite remonstrances from my boss that it's nothing personal).

Rather than fall into the trap of "they are screwing me over", I want to focus on the positive aspects of my job, specifically, right now, so I remember how lucky I truly am.

Today, at work, I feel grateful for:
- Actually having a job that brings me a paycheck. Several of my radio colleagues were let go this past week at a competing radio station, which drives home - again - that I am blessed to be employed. Hell, my husband is even in job limbo right now, while his company restructures, so he's technically not working this week.
- Having a job that rallied it's resources to support me when I was searching for my lost dog, Chelsea. That was a harrowing experience, and they did everything they could to leverage the media resources we have to spread the word about her.
- A recent decision by the bosses to return us back to being on the air from 5am to 9am - it's been fun to be back on the air from 8-9am and to connect with our listeners again.
- Having coworkers that listen to me vent when I need to.
- To have a job where no one dies if I have a bad day - I have friends that are doctors and nurses, and if they have a bad day, the consequences are serious!

OK - that helped a little. I am glad it's Friday. Ooo! I can be grateful for that, as well! I am grateful that I have a job where I have most weekends off, including this one.

Thanks for listening. I feel much better.

If you want bread, you have to follow the instructions....

2012-01-04T05:17:00.001-08:00

One of my favorite presents that S and I received for our wedding was a bread maker. I envisioned loaves and loaves of warm bread on cold winter mornings. I pictured giving loaves of bread as gifts to loved ones and family for Christmas. I imagined sumptuous meals served with just the right side of a home made baguette. Life was going to be perfect with all of this homemade, yummy bread, right?

Wrong.

When I opened the box that the bread maker came in, I noticed the instruction manual, but paid no mind to silly little details in the front. Instead, I arrogantly flipped to the back to the enticing sounding recipes. I snapped the bread pan in place, loaded it up with the ingredients listed, and punched the appropriate buttons and settled in to wait on this fabulous first loaf of bread that I was sure to be eating in just three hours.

Do you know what I had in three hours?

Hot flour.

Apparently, it helps if you attach the little blade that stirs the ingredients together. I would have known that if I had read the directions, fully...and followed them. After three hours of waiting and listening to the machine make lots of fun noises, I was certain that yummy bread was inevitable.

It turns out that the adage: "If you want what we have, do what we do" applies to bread, as well as life, in general. If I wanted to have the yummy bread that I was hoping for, I needed to follow the instructions - all of them. I couldn't just flip past the parts I didn't want to be bothered to read and focus on the fun stuff (the recipes and results), and honestly think that I was going to be rewarded with the end result I was hoping for.

In order to make bread, I had to use all of the tools offered to me. If I want to have a life more like the one that a friend has, I have to do all that she does...not just the parts that come easily, anyway. I may not be as interested in the "boring" stuff like reading the directions, but if I want the good stuff, like yummy bread or better fitness or whatever goal I am hoping to achieve, I need to read them and follow them.

I am still trying to master the art of bread making. I've had some great results - when I remember to follow the instructions!

This year, I resolve to....

2012-01-03T04:33:00.000-08:00

I usually love making long lists of New Year's Resolutions (see yesterday's post for more about why), but this year, I have had a hard time getting motivated in making my list.

Part of the reason is that I already do a lot of the things that are typical resolutions: exercise, stay in touch with friends, don't drink or smoke, etc. I want to recommit to some of those things, but I also want to try something NEW, too. So, I am having to think a little out of the box for 2012.

In 2012, I resolve to:
- Sleep more. After years of always saying "I don't sleep much", I am going to make an effort to turn that around. I will get in bed early enough each night to give myself a shot at a full night's sleep. I will nap when I am tired.
- Use my new treadmill. I am recommitting to exercising. I will hop on that treadmill, at least 4 days a week for 30 minutes each day. (S has offered to keep me motivated on this one - he said that for every I don't use it, he's going to pile one shirt on it just to see how long it takes me to notice.)
- Show more gratitude. Instead of just blogging about what I am grateful for, I will show/tell/demonstrate my gratitude outwardly. I will send thank you notes (thanks to Jon Acuff for the inspiration for that idea!)
- Boycott all things Kardashian, whenever possible. In my radio job, I cover celebrity gossip - but this year, I vow to keep mum about that ridiculous family as much as I can. Unless one of them hijacks a plane, blows up the White House or cures cancer, I hope to have a Kardashian-free 2012.
- Travel to someplace I have never been. Right now, we have our eyes on Vegas next month - but if that doesn't come to fruition, we will pick another US location and hit the road!
- Eat more real food. I don't mean that I want to eat more - I want to eat more real food. Less processed, more actual food. I will cook at home more, shop on the perimeter of the grocery stores more.
- Focus on the positive, forget about the negative. The universal law of the power of attraction has been alive and well in my life for years. Thoughts become things. I will focus on positive people, places and things - and more of those will come into my life, as a result. It's not ignorance to forget about the negative - it's a choice, a powerful choice that anyone can make.
- Blog 225 times. That works out to about 4 times a week. I want to grow this blog - and I know that regular entries will help with that goal as well. (By the way, if you wanted to "follow" me, you can subscribe to this blog by email too!)
- Play. We have board games, video games, card games - and we have a blast using them. We will turn off the TV - and play with each other! We will invite friends over to play, too!
- Be gentle with myself. I am my own worst critic, and I would never talk to a friend the way I talk to myself. When I stumble, bumble or make a mistake, I will forgive myself and gently try to get back on track. As I learned last year, some times, it's even better to NOT stick to the plan than to force my way through.

Most of those aren't very concrete goals - so, I'll have to find a way to keep track of them. Usually, I use events like anniversaries, birthdays and holidays to compare this year to last year, but I might need to find a way to quantify some of these. Any suggestions?

Are you making a list this year? How many items are on your list, if you are? Is your list different this year than last year?

The lesson I learned from failing on my New Year's Resolution

2012-01-02T03:22:00.000-08:00

Every year, for as long as I can remember, I have made a ridiculously long list of New Year's resolutions. They've ranged from traveling to a foreign country (which I did) to running my first half marathon (which I did!) to meeting the love of my life (which I also did!) to everything in between. I've spent weeks before the beginning of the new year, brainstorming, planning, scheming, until finally, on December 31st, I print out the dozen or more resolutions and post them everywhere in my house.

Why do I do this to myself?

One, life is short. I witnessed firsthand what happens when you wait for "later" to check things off of the list of things you've always wanted to do. My parents always had plans for the life they were going to live when they retired. My dad toiled away at his job, and my mom did everything in the world for everyone else in her life. The payoff was going to be that someday, when they retired, they were going to live it up, exactly like they wanted to. Unfortunately, their plan didn't work out exactly like they had hoped. My dad was lucky enough to retire at the beginning of 2000, but my mother passed away in July of that same year from cancer, at the age of 50.

After witnessing that, I felt driven to DO something each year - not wait until "later". My mother was an amazing woman - and I love the example of service to others that she left for me (and everyone else around her), but I wished, for her sake, that she got to experience more of the things she was putting off until "later". I didn't want to find myself at the end of my days on this Earth and regret having put experiences I wanted to have or accomplishments that I wanted to achieve until "later", because sometimes, we don't get to have a "later".

Another reason for my list is that I am a girl that likes to know the plan. I like to know what's going to happen, when it's going to happen, and how we are going to make it happen. When in doubt, I can always come back to the plan. When I am faced with a decision of how to spend my time, I can revert back to my list of resolutions and use it as a guide of how I want to spend my time. If I have decided that I want to run a half marathon, then, I need to get outside and run instead of sitting on the couch and reading. If I have decided that I want to read a new book every month, I need to sit on the couch and read instead of getting outside and running.

Both of those are positive reasons for wanting to make a list of resolutions for the new year, but this year, I discovered another reason that I like to make this annual resolutions list: I like to have a measuring stick to beat myself up with when I find myself falling short of the goals that I set. How self-defeating is that? I create the list - and then, use it to make myself feel bad if I don't adhere to it, perfectly.

In 2011, I wanted to run a marathon. I had run a half marathon in 2010, and wanted to step it up to the next level and run a full marathon this past year. I was training my butt off (figuratively and literally). I spent hours a week running. Early on Sunday mornings, I got up and ran with a training group - 7, 10, 17 miles a week. I ran through the aches and pains. I bought special running gear. I was into it.

Then, I got sick a few times in rapid succession - probably from being so worn out - and fell off of the training schedule. I was so frustrated with myself. I tried to get back on schedule, but my motivation was gone. I was so far behind on the training program that it felt like I would never catch up. It got to the point where I was resentful if I did run or I was resentful if I didn't run. It was a no-win situation.

Until one day, when I realized that no one was forcing me to run a marathon. I didn't have a gun to my head to finish this event. I wasn't going to lose my job. I wasn't being paid to run in it. No one was going to die if I didn't run the dang marathon. It was a self-imposed goal of which I fell short. I didn't have to run it!

This may sound elementary to you, but it was an epiphany to me. I quit running, and no one else cared. The relief that I felt from removing that goal from my list for the year was immense.

The lesson I learned from quitting marathon training was quite simple, but life changing. I need to assess my goals every day to see if they are still working for me, not just once a year. A lot can happen in the course of 365 days, and goals that I set on December 31st may not still fit into my life later on down the road. It's good to have goals as guideposts - but when they turn into baseball bats that I am beating myself with, it's time to reevaluate.

This year, I have been reluctant to set any resolutions on paper because I didn't want to set myself up to fall into the same trap again. However, I think I do want to set some goals for 2012 - ones that I will reevaluate as the year progresses. I'll post those tomorrow.

In the mean time, I'd love to hear from you - what lessons have you learned this year? Did you set resolutions for 2011? How did you do in achieving what you had hoped to? Is 2012 going to be a different year?

Excited to be at work? Or not so much....

2011-12-27T08:05:00.000-08:00

Anyone else feel like Christmas just whirled by, and find themselves stunned to be back at work already? Well, according to most of the posts I have seen on Twitter or Facebook - a lot of my friends are pretty cranky about being back at work.

Some days, I relate. I am not always joyous or happy to come to work. When you get up for work as early as I do (4am!), it can be tough to be grateful - but the bottom line is that I GET to work. I don't HAVE to work. If I truly am that grumpy about my circumstances, it's my job to do something to change it!

So, here's where I am: I love what I do. I have been in radio for over 17 years, and it hasn't lost it's thrill yet. I have toyed with leaving to do other things along the way - but always come back to the fact that I get to do what I love every day, and that is such a gift!

I don't want to change that - so, I change the things I can. I can go to bed earlier - I can accept the fact that I WANT more sleep, and let myself go to bed earlier to get it.

More importantly, I can change my ATTITUDE about work. I don't have to work - I GET to work. Because I work, my life has amazing opportunities and blessings in it. When I come to work each day, I am stacking up more of these...every time. When I can take a moment to remember THAT, it's a lot easier to get out of my warm bed with my snuggly, cute husband still in it, and get ready to take on the day.

This morning, I actually woke up before my alarm clock! Instead of grumbling about missing out on a few extra minutes of sleep, I thanked God for the chance to get caught up on emails and news before rushing headlong into the day.

Finally, when in doubt, I try to remember that it could always be worse. :)

Why I believe in Santa again

2011-12-21T04:45:00.000-08:00

I believe in Santa again.

When I was about 5, I figured out what was really going on with Santa, and it was my mom's own fault, really. She's the one that taught me how to read when I was only 3 - and I got suspicious when I realized that Santa's handwriting on the gift tags looked an awful lot like hers.

After a very frank conversation with my mom about the truth, I don't remember being devastated - as a matter of fact, I was so proud of my cleverness at figuring the whole thing out that I could wait to tell everyone: my brother, neighborhood kids, cousins.

I wasn't very popular that Christmas.

Anyway, I saw this blog post last week, and want to keep it so I have a really good answer when my kids ask for the truth about Santa Claus - which is, YES, there IS a Santa Claus. Read below to find out why I believe again.

A few months back, the Tooth Fairy got busted. She left a note for Alice up on her computer, and Lucy figured the whole business out. The Tooth Fairy cursed her need to write notes in elaborate fonts and tried to come up with a cover story, but it didn’t fool Lucy.

To her credit, Lucy has kept the secret from her little sister, who still hasn’t lost a tooth and deserves to wake up with money under her pillow.

But the Tooth Fairy knew it couldn’t be too long before Santa was similarly unmasked. She didn’t know when or how, but she knew the days of magic in her house, at least magic of a certain sort, were coming to an end.

And the Tooth Fairy—by which I mean myself—was pretty darned sad about the inevitable, which finally arrived last week.

Lucy and I have been exchanging notes since the school year started. We’ve talked about all sorts of things—sports, books we’d like to read, adventures we’d like to have, even stories from when I was in third grade. For the most part, though, it’s been light, casual stuff. Until last week.

I NEED TO KNOW, she wrote, using capital letters for emphasis. ARE YOU SANTA? TELL ME THE TRUTH.

What do you do when your kid asks for the truth? You tell it, of course, doing your best to figure out a way that keeps at least some of the magic intact.

Here’s what I wrote:

Dear Lucy,

Thank you for your letter. You asked a very good question: “Are you Santa?”

I know you’ve wanted the answer to this question for a long time, and I’ve had to give it careful thought to know just what to say.

The answer is no. I am not Santa. There is no one Santa.

I am the person who fills your stockings with presents, though. I also choose and wrap the presents under the tree, the same way my mom did for me, and the same way her mom did for her. (And yes, Daddy helps, too.)

I imagine you will someday do this for your children, and I know you will love seeing them run down the stairs on Christmas morning. You will love seeing them sit under the tree, their small faces lit with Christmas lights.

This won’t make you Santa, though.

Santa is bigger than any person, and his work has gone on longer than any of us have lived. What he does is simple, but it is powerful. He teaches children how to have belief in something they can’t see or touch.

It’s a big job, and it’s an important one. Throughout your life, you will need this capacity to believe: in yourself, in your friends, in your talents and in your family. You’ll also need to believe in things you can’t measure or even hold in your hand. Here, I am talking about love, that great power that will light your life from the inside out, even during its darkest, coldest moments.

Santa is a teacher, and I have been his student, and now you know the secret of how he gets down all those chimneys on Christmas Eve: he has help from all the people whose hearts he’s filled with joy.

With full hearts, people like Daddy and me take our turns helping Santa do a job that would otherwise be impossible.

So, no. I am not Santa. Santa is love and magic and hope and happiness. I’m on his team, and now you are, too.

I love you and I always will.

Mama

100 Ways to Nurture Yourself

2011-12-20T06:49:00.000-08:00

I saw this today when I poking around the web - and it's a GREAT list of things we can do to nurture ourselves. Especially in this crazy holiday season, a lot of us are burning the candle at both ends - so it's important to make sure we are taking the time to take care of ourselves.

My personal favorites? #7, #11, #14 (something I really need to work on!), #18....actually, MOST of this list is my favorite! Which ones do you like most?

From Demanding Joy:

Probably the most important component to demanding your joy is learning to take excellent care of yourself – mind, body, and spirit. Think of caring for yourself as if you were your own child – giving to yourself at least as much as you give to others. You are worth it!

Like joy itself, self-nurturing comes in many little bits. Here are 100 of those bits for your consideration. This is not a checklist – only a list of suggestions. Please take the ones that speak to you and ignore the rest. Enjoy!

Put a post-it on your mirror that says, “You look beautiful!” – and then accept the compliment every time you look at yourself.
Buy fresh flowers every now and then. – Brighten up the place.
Used colored pens for no particular reason. – Blue and black are fine, but how about orange?
Take a walk without a destination. – It’s a great way to get some exercise and clear your mind. Be mindful of what you see, hear and feel.
Take a hot bath. – With bubbles.
Write in a journal. – Write anything that calls you. Ideas, experiences, dreams, frustrations – get them out of your head and down on paper.
List the things that you’re grateful for. – You can’t help but feel better when you literally count your blessings.
List the things that you like about yourself. – We can all list the things that we don’t like about ourselves. Turn that around and think about your many positive qualities.
Create something. – Many of us have gotten away from actually making things. Create some artwork. Write something. Build something. Make something that didn’t exist before. It can be functional or frivolous – as long as you enjoy the process.
Treat yourself. – We struggle to be disciplined, especially with money and food. You deserve a reward, right?
Smile. – It’s very difficult to feel bad when your face is happy.
Squash negative thoughts. – Listen to what’s going on in your head and actively quiet the voices of pessimists and critics. Assume the best, not the worst.
Try something new. – Go out on a limb. Learn something new. Do that thing you’ve always wanted to try. The more experiences you have, the richer your life will be.
Get enough sleep. – Everything is hard when you’re tired.
Meditate. – It takes a little practice at first, but if you find a meditation that works for you, you will be calmer and more peaceful.
Drink plenty of water. – It’s basic, but it’s so good for you.
Stretch. – Before you start your day, take a few minutes for a good muscle stretch. It just plain feels good. And, it’s fast, easy and free.
Put some “me time” on your calendar. – When life gets busy, doing things for yourself is the first thing to be sacrificed. So, actually block out time on your calendar. Call it a ‘staff meeting’ or something so that no one intrudes on your time.
Call a friend. – Think of someone who you enjoy and ring them up!
Ask for help. – This can be hard. But it’s so important to recognize when you need a sounding board, or some advice, or an extra pair of hands.
Say no. – Your time is valuable. Set boundaries to avoid becoming overwhelmed.
Ask for a hug. – We all need one. So just go get one. The person you ask probably needs one too.
Delegate. – Hire someone to mow the lawn or scrub the floors. Teach the kids to do laundry. Give that project to a co-worker. You do not have to do it all.
Take a deep breath. – And another. Now another. It’s like a mini-break to reset yourself during the day.
Light a candle or use a reed diffuser. – Your sense of smell creates the strongest memories. Find scents you love and enjoy them.
Claim some space for yourself. – A place where you can go to have a quiet moment to read a book, or meditate, or cry – somewhere that you can get some peace and privacy.
Get out into nature. – Reconnecting with the earth is just good for your soul. Feel the breeze. Breathe the fresh air. So good!
Buy the good ice cream. – Even on the tightest of budgets, this is important.
Use lotions & soaps with scents that you love. – It’s a nice way to pamper yourself, plus you’ll smell good all day.
Give a compliment. – Telling someone that they had a fantastic idea or that they look beautiful in that color creates a pleasant environment and makes two people feel good for the price of one.
Listen to music. – Listen to whatever makes you happy. Can you be grumpy while listening to Gloria Gaynor? I think not.
Play. – Something we forget as adults. A board game, a sport, finger painting – find something frivolous and have fun!
Eat foods that you love. – Low fat, low calorie, low carb – blah, blah, blah. Food is to be enjoyed! Put food into your body that nourishes you in every way.
Be silly every now and again. – We take ourselves entirely too seriously. Let go. Be spontaneous and outrageous!
Laugh. – Sometimes you just need a good laugh to lift your spirits.
Limit screen time. – Too much time in front of computers, TV’s, video games, and blackberries (or all of the above) disconnects you from the world immediately around you and makes your brain mushy. Make sure that you’re getting plenty of input from the non-virtual world.
Be present. – Be deliberate about experiencing what’s happening right now. It’s all about the journey – don’t miss yours!
Stop worrying. – It’s going to be fine. Because it is.
Trust yourself. – You are smart, capable and talented. Your choices are just as valid as anyone else’s. Don’t second guess yourself.
Do something that’s only for you. – Remember that hobby that you used to have time for? Or that food that no one else in your house likes? Reclaim it.
Make sure your health is in order. – What’s more important than your health? See your doctor regularly. Make sure you are getting the vitamins or supplements that you need. Advocate for yourself as you would for your child.
Give to someone in need. – Donating your time or your stuff or your money to someone less fortunate makes you feel good and puts your problems into perspective.
Sparkle! – Feeling schlumpy? Get all dolled up. Wear something schmancy. It’s a good way to find your strut.
Dance. – It’s inherently joyful. You can’t be sad if you’re dancing!
Write your own rock star introduction. – Image you’re on tour with thousands of screaming fans. How will you be introduced? “Please welcome the brilliant, the amazing, the gorgeous….you!”
Stand up for yourself. – Your needs are important. Don’t let anyone disregard them. Pushing back can be scary but it’s empowering too!
Celebrate! (for any reason at all) – Your kid learned to tie his shoes! Your taxes are done and filed! The week is more than half over! Let’s party!
Find a mantra or an affirmation that lifts your spirits. – “Today is a new day.” “I know that life always supports me.” “I get everything that I want.” Find one that works for you.
Stand tall. – Your spirit can’t soar when you slouch. You feel much more powerful when you stand up straight and look the world in the eye.
Have sex. – What can I say? It feels good.
Get a massage. – What can I say? It feels good.
Choose optimism. – Thinking positive thoughts has a tangible impact on your day and on your life.
Dream big. – You can do anything you set your mind to!
Tune out the naysayers. – People criticize for many reasons, most of which have nothing to do with you. Follow your heart – not everyone has to get it.
Add color to your surroundings. – Beiges and taupes are pervasive these days. Depressing. Make sure that you introduce energetic colors where you work and where you live.
Surround yourself with the things you love. – Photos of loved ones or mementos that bring happy memories. You should have the stuff that you love all around you.
Declutter. – You should have ONLY the stuff that you love. Purge everything in your life, both physical and emotional that you don’t honestly need, use or love. Everything else distracts you from your true intentions and bogs you down.
Stop procrastinating. – Procrastination is a form of perfectionism. Accept that it’s not going to be perfect and just get it over with. Image how great it will feel to not have it hanging over your head any more!
Listen to your inner voice. – Your instincts are good. It’s important to listen to your own head and heart.
Cut yourself some slack. – Arguably the most important tip on this list. We hold ourselves to impossible standards and then beat ourselves up when we don’t meet them. Would you be this hard on anyone else?
Slow down. – When you’re living your life at top speed, you’re missing most of it. Stop and take a breath. Look for ways to adopt a more humane pace.
Identify your passion. – What do you love? Do you have a non-profit organization that you feel passionate about? Are you passionate about water polo? How about 14th century Portuguese literature? Find something in your life that really floats your boat.
Toot your own horn. – You’re awesome. Please make sure that everyone knows it.
Move your body. – Run and jump and climb a tree. Take a tap dancing class. Power walk. Anything that feels good that gets your blood moving. The only limitation: it has to be fun. Don’t get on a treadmill if you hate the treadmill.
Invest in really good bras. – This one is gender-specific, obviously. You feel much better about yourself when you’re hoisted up properly. So stand tall and salute the sun ladies!
Purge things that aren’t good for you. – Unhealthy foods, cigarettes, a miserable work environment, toxic people – do what you have to do to set boundaries and demand the highest quality of life. You deserve it. Things that don’t nourish and support you – think about how you might be rid of them.
Limit your news consumption. – It’s important to be well-informed, but the non-stop feed of earthquakes and plane crashes and economic crisis and war is not good for us. Be deliberate in finding a balance that’s best for you. Once you’ve seen today’s news cycle, turn it off.
Say yes to life. – Opportunities are everywhere. Take a class, join a team, go bungee jumping. When new things present themselves to you – jump at the chance.
Stop hating your body. – If the women of the world took all of the time, energy and money that we spend on hating our bodies and turned it towards something productive, there would be no war, poverty or disease left on the planet. Your body is your body. Nobody’s looking at your physical flaws because they’re all too busy trying to hide their own. Let’s give ourselves a break and let it go.
Sing loudly. – In the shower and the car and anywhere else you like. With reckless abandon.
Be kind. – Be nice to someone else. You will have made the world a better place. What feels better than that?
Tell someone you love them. – We often forget to say it out loud. It matters.
Take all of your vacation days. – You earned them. Don’t give them back to your company for nothing.
Play hooky. – Call in sick once in awhile when you’re not sick. Use the day to pamper yourself (not to catch up on errands or housework).
Take pride in the hard times that you have overcome. – What didn’t kill you made you stronger. It wasn’t easy, but you did it!
Let someone else be in charge for a while. – Other people can be responsible while you do something for yourself.
Don’t answer the phone unless it’s someone you want to talk to right now. – Some people find it difficult not to answer a ringing phone, but it’s liberating once you learn to ignore it or even better, just turn it off.
Have faith. – It’s going to work out. The future is bright!
Take a personal inventory. – Does your behavior match your true intentions? If there’s a disconnect, you’re carrying a heavy weight.
Go on a retreat. – For a couple of minutes or a couple of days, get away for a bit to re-energize.
Put your finances in order. – Money problems are enormously stressful. Paying off debt where possible, putting bills on automatic payment, and working with a financial planner if necessary can all help to ease the strain.
Eliminate all expectations of perfection. – In fact, eliminate the word ‘perfect’ from your vocabulary. If you expect yourself to be perfect, you will never stop beating yourself up.
Find a good way to blow off steam. – Bottling it up indefinitely will probably end badly.
Be who you are. – your authentic, true self.
Spend some time alone for quiet reflection. – We spend all of our time go, go, going. Try stopping to think about your life, your goals, and your dreams.
Keep your words positive. – Happiness and complaints cannot coexist.
Let light and fresh air into your house. – Sunlight is a must. Open up those windows!
Turn off your e-mail, cell phone, blackberry, fax, etc. for a while. – It’s not healthy to be accessible 24/7.
Pare down your to-do list. – Feeling overwhelmed? What’s on your list that can be delegated, avoided, or jettisoned?
Avoid boredom. – Keep your brain active to keep the blues at bay.
Make your home a haven. – Your home should be a place where you can take a breath and really relax. If it isn’t, you may have some work to do.
Be stingy with your time and energy. – Both are precious and should be spent on things that really matter to you.
Let go. – 80% of everything is irrelevant. Focus on the other 20.
Minimize multi-tasking. – Yeah, women are supposed to be good at it, but that doesn’t make it good for us.
Break your routine once in awhile. – Get out of a rut and into a groove.
Take action! – If something isn’t right in your life, fix it!
Plan ahead. – With a few minutes of organizing your time and to-do’s, you will be better prepared to take on the day.
Intentionally enjoy your journey. – As you go through your days, look around. Be present with what you see, hear and feel. You might be amazed at what you’ve been missing.
Spend time with people who make you happy. – Who nourishes and supports you? Surround yourself with those people.
Enjoy your kids. – It’s easy to rush through the day without really connecting with them. Make a conscious effort to talk with them about their day.
Avoid self-deprivation. – When it comes to food, it’s OK to cut back on things that aren’t good for you (sweet, sweet carbohydrates), but if you feel deprived, it’s probably not maintainable, creating a vicious circle of cheating and guilt.
Forget the word “should”. – Instead of doing what you think you’re supposed to, follow your own path.
Pay attention to your energy. – Are you most productive first thing in the morning? Are you sluggish after lunch? Honor your natural cycles and plan accordingly.

OK, that’s more than 100. I got carried away.

A surprise at a surprise party

2011-12-19T07:26:00.000-08:00

I had the honor of going to a dear friend's 70th birthday party last night, and it was truly a special event. It was a surprise party - which, as we discovered once the special lady had arrived, was her first! There was much food and laughter, and an incredible cake, so, if that had been all that happened, it would have been a very fun night. But then, things turned a little more magical.

My favorite part of the evening was when someone suggested we all go around and speak to what we loved most about the birthday girl. I was brought to tears more than once as the women in attendance shared how they had met Liz, and what she had meant to them over their friendship.

They spoke of her grace, her patience, her acceptance of each of us (exactly as we are), her willingness to give time, her willingness to give of herself, her honesty, her creativity, her humility, her maternal energy, and much much more. They spoke of her integrity and humaness, and how much she had changed each of their lives.

As I got in my car and drove away, I was struck with the thought that we should do that more. We should take the time out to celebrate the people we love and tell them WHY we love them, to their face. Sure, we felt a little silly when we first started out, but as we got going, it was a powerful and moving experience, and I am glad I was there for it.

I was also inspired to try to live my life a little more like Liz - she's already one of my role models and heroes, anyway, but I want to live a life that leaves people with nice things to say. If I end up being half the woman that she is, I will have lived a useful and purposeful life, and will have helped and impacted a lot of people. I was inspired to try to live in a way that would leave people talking nicely about me - whether it was my 70th birthday or not.

What would people say about you on your 70th birthday? What would they say today?

Today, I am going to pick just one of her many fabulous qualities, and try to practice it in my interactions with other people. I figure that's a start - hopefully, over the next 35 years, I can master a few, and end up a lot more like Liz.

Up early on a Saturday...and grateful?

2011-12-17T04:58:00.000-08:00

What on earth am I doing up so early on a Saturday morning? Well, I am one of those "if I am up, I am up" types, so once I wake up, I am usually up for the day. So, when my eyes popped open just before 5am, I knew I was up for the day. I had two choices - I could be bitter...or I could make the best of it.

Because of my work schedule, I am pretty accustomed to not getting a lot of sleep. I get up at 4am - so to get a full 8 hours of sleep a night, I would have to go to bed at 8pm. That doesn't happen that often...

So, here it is, Saturday, and I am up when I really don't need to be. Rather than be annoyed - I decided to make the best of it. I made myself a yummy cup of tea, and some toast on the homemade bread I made yesterday in our new bread maker. I paid some bills - which had been nagging at me to take care of this week. I am working on the thank you cards for our wedding (4 months ago...don't judge me!). I am blogging. All before 7am!

Now, no matter what else I do today, I can feel pretty accomplished. Here's the kicker: I have a BUNCH else planned today...but instead of complaining about being sleepy, I can be grateful for the "extra" time I found in my schedule to take care of some of the things I've been wanting to, and some time to eat a yummy breakfast, instead of grabbing a meal bar on the way out the door.

It's been a little while since I posted a gratitude list, so here's the rest of my list for today:
- Butternut squash - I recently mustered up enough courage to try to make it, and it's delicious! Why have I been holding out for so long?
- The dogs barking - when Chelsea ran away recently, the house was way too quiet. Now, each time she barks, it's a reminder that she's home, safe and sound. (I kind of wish she would find another way to remind me...but I will stay grateful that she's safe.)
- A husband that helps - when I ask for what I need, he remembers AND does it. I do NOT take that for granted!
- Special, fancy, high thread count sheets - they were a gift, and to be honest, I never got the whole "thread count" thing...but now, I GET it. It's the gift that keeps on giving.
- Comedy specials and funny movies - it's nice to hear my husband laugh, even when things are really yucky right now.

Dear God, thanks for the extra time to connect today, and to get some things done this morning. Thank you, also, for the many other blessings in my life. I know that everything will be alright - no matter what, You have a better plan than I can even imagine. Please keep a loving and comforting arm around S, and guide us both to make good decisions going forward. Please keep an eye on the girls from St. Anne's - the holidays can be a tricky time for people in recovery. If there's a way for me to be of service to them or to anyone else, please show me and give me the gifts to do what is needed. Also, please keep a special eye on my friends and loved ones - I need each and every one of them that I have. Thank you for keeping them safe and healthy. Amen.

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2011-12-16T09:23:00.001-08:00

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