JEDWARD TO WIN X FACTOR CAMPAIGN

JEDWARD TO WIN RETURN FOR JEDWARD TO WIN (celebrity big brother)

Sat, 20 Aug 2011 16:36:25 -0400

Hello for JEDWARD fans! who are reading.

We (I) are returning because JEDWARD TO WIN is no a reapplicable name because they will win Celebrity Big Brother.

“We want to thank JEDWARD TO WIN for there massive support, because they are exclusively responsible for our winning,” JEDWARD didn’t say but would have if they heard of us.

Where have we (I) been? you probably thought, every time you pressed refrsh on are site. We (I) have been working at dominos.

Now we (im) back!

“I kknew you were going to be a good blogger from the moment you walked out here,” Louis would obviously say. say

GOOD LUCK ON CELEBRITY BIG BROTHER JEDWARD!

Photo of their fampous entry to the house:

CHEATS PUSH JEDWARD OUT

Tue, 22 Dec 2009 11:01:36 -0500

Chetaers in the xFactor competition pushed out JEDWARD amidst fear of JEDWARD pwning them.

This post took ages to write as were were comatose from bafflement.

JEWARD later exacted revenge with a web campaign to push the winner from the Xmas number 1 slot.

JEDWARD fans gave Simon Cowell a collective “FUCK YOU”

thank you all, goodbye

An upset JEDWARD fan

JEDWARD SLAM COMPETITION LIKE A WHORE

Mon, 09 Nov 2009 07:23:00 -0500

JEDWARD fans across the country collectivly dropped one as the twins entered the final two.

Simon in his bastard cape and fangs tip tapped his fingers on the desk and the audience in the colluseum waited with misty breath on whether they would get a thumb up or down.

Lucy’s unborn child dies through her woe

It was officially divine intervention that made Simon leave it to the audience to decide, and guess what, the audience loves JEDWARD for their tallest hair, which was notably taller than evar.

“Lucy was quite fit but does not haave fly dance moves like us” JEDWARD may have said.

Louis’ efforts behind the scenes however, passing money to the right people and working the press and rigging phone lines, was not the real reason for JEDWARDS survival on Sunday.

JEDWARD MAKE GIRLS FREEK

Wed, 28 Oct 2009 15:43:00 -0400

JEDWARD are reportedly makeing 4x as many girls freak out as the day before.

a scientist may have said, “the freak out growth rate is exponential, which means women are freaking out thrice as much daily, which is twice more than before JEDWARD jumped and air kicked onto the scene”.

these girls have been even getting their baps out for JEDWARD, but this is no suprise to long term JEDWARD fans.

“jEDWARD are getting us so hot that we must get out our baps at most times a day”, a fan probably said. “ all my facebook friends, between saying twitter is better, are saying JEDWARD have unrealtime hair”

UPDATE: the crowd *have since kicked reported sore and severly broken necks from looking for JEDWARD through the tall windows all day.

*might

“Matt” from the telly has this exclusive report of X...

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 19:22:36 -0400

“Matt” from the telly has this exclusive report of X FACTOR for us

(viamattedmondson)

*not in reality exclusive to us

simon 'music bastard' cowell's EVIL SCHEME:

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 17:40:40 -0400

you may have heard today on the internet that JEDWARD WON the most votes. you will not be suprised, they are super fly.

but consider this young jedwan. SIMON COWELL IS TRYING TO SCREW JEDWARD. thats right, he has leaked info for the first time to make them get less votes next week.

IGNORE THIS LEAK. YOU MUST MUST MUSTEST VOTE FOR JEDWARD MORE. JEDWARD are not safe from this terrible music business, theyre talent will be taken advantage of and we must cusion them with telephonic voting.

THEY NEED YOUR VOTE OR THEY WILL STARVE.*

*pioneer louis walsh is a real pro when it comes to nurturing talent but his his methods are pretty hardcore, and they include starving and the naughty step. apparently he’s pretty hardcore into his supernanny, which incidently is why his sky+ box is ALWAYS full.

(picture from http://www.danschawbel.com/)

HAIR INSPIRED BY JEDWARD

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 14:01:00 -0400

we all know how tallest and cool is JEDWARDs hair. the internet has been aflamed with amazing inpiration from JEDWARD and we are now amidst a hair revolution.

everything about this picture says ‘wooosh! we can really sing.“

readers of this blog have been sending in their tall hair efforts and we will be comparing them to JEDWARD.

this is a good effort. you will notice his hair is perhaps half as tallest as JEDWARDs, which is pretty good.

this is another impressive shot and is suprisingly 2/3 the tallness of JEDWARDs hair. UPDATE: a specialist has contacted us and says the realness of this hair is bullshit. dont shoot the messenger bro but we agree their hair is full of BULLSHIT. JEDWARD doesnt cheat, they win million of votes through hard real life work and we should learn not to cheat from them.

here is a weak effort from someone:

you might agree their hair is quite long. yes, i agree. but this is not tallest hair. if you want to impress JEDWARD then make it TALLER. this is the wrong site for you miss swing.

CORRECT GRAMMAR FOR JEDWARD:

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 12:55:00 -0400

there is only exclusively one rule for when writing the word JEDWARD": always write it like this, JEDWARD. this is always in capticals and as loud as possible.

as well as this one rule there is just one excelption, of using the best describing words. these are probably called nouns. consider the order of real words:

BEST

BESTER

BESTEST

of course, none of these correctly identify JEDWARD, they are not the best version of the word best.

so you add the word ’-EST’ on, like this:

BESTESTEST

AND THis unique style of JEDWARD nouns are used on anything like their hair which is TALLESTEST and their fly skills which are flyest.

the final rule which is the only other exception is that JEDWARD is written in capitals.

JEDWARD’s x factor debut! wow when they say ‘are you...

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 07:27:00 -0400

JEDWARD’s x factor debut!

wow when they say ‘are you ready to party’ i suddenly want to party!

they talk about how the ladies want them, because they have the best tallestest hair on stage at the time.

you can see louis show his high grade music intuition as his face lights up like london in the 40s.

the whole house is screaming for them, everyone is thinking 'these are surely the greatest artists ever, how did they keep it a secret?“ but it was bound to come out. here they are

JEDWARD YOU MUST WIN, for are futures

(via TheXFactorUK)

JEDWARD TO WIN!

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 06:32:45 -0400

what do you think? leave your comments, but they must be positive or we will keep your name on a list for when JEDWARD are in charge.