Jeffersaurus Rex! - Hi, my name is Jeffer

Students of Color Conference 2010 - RECAP!

2010-11-27T22:40:00.000-08:00

So this post is kind of overdue, but this past weekend (Nov 20-21), I had the opportunity to attend the Students of Color Conference held at UC Santa Barbara. I went with a delegation of 114 people from UC Davis. It took 7.5 hours to drive to UCSB, and 6.5 to drive back to Davis. This past weekend has been mentally and physically draining but not just because of the long drive.

I'll have to give props to the SOCC 2010 planning committee because I'm sure they were stressed out planning for such a big conference. Props to those in charge of the Davis delegation, too. I generally enjoyed myself and had good conversations with awesome people last weekend.

I guess I'll be recapping my experience at SOCC. Despite generally having a good time, I left the conference feeling "meh" which is mostly due to my experience at the workshops I went to... I guess I wasn't too bummed out mostly because I had good company, but.... I just wish the workshops I went to were better... Or that they were more conscious about intersectionalities, inclusivity, and privilege. That's probably really vague, but I seem to always leave conferences feeling that way.

Examples: Previous Conferences

I had the same feeling when I went to the Western Regional LGBTQIA conference at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo back in February of 2010. They weren't even planning to put on workshop that addressed non-monosexualities and biphobia until someone I know said something about it to the organizers and offered to put one on herself. I also must've heard someone say “you guys” every 3 seconds, not to mention that the keynote speaker was someone from GLAAD who made a joke about how her relationship with her partner was in the minority because they haven't divorced or broken up (plus, they were a lesbian couple). I just got this awkward feeling like... “Wow, I just imagine all these queer kids with divorced parents and 'broken' families feeling awkward right about now.” Is it just me and my Davis friends/acquaintances who notice these things? I guess some of these might seem to be really minor issues, like with the “you guys” comments. But if it's such a minor thing, then it shouldn't be that hard to make an effort to change it, right? I also get the feeling that the people I know from Davis tend to be criticized for being OMGZTOORADICAL which is silly... this will be mentioned in a bit.

At the 2010 Transgender Leadership Summit, a friend of mine leaned over to pick up something from one of the tables in the hallway and someone who was volunteering or in charge apparently took that to mean that they were bowing (said friend is hapa) and responded with a bow and said “domo” or something to that effect. Huh??? So bizarre. It's like that one time my mom was at the grocery store and the bagger tried to impress her by thanking her in Chinese... Except we're Vietnamese...

Let me preface all of this by saying that my criticisms are not meant to invalidate these conferences, and especially not the Students of Color Conference, which I will be recapping. I'm glad other people enjoyed their weekend, and I'm glad people learned a lot. I just wonder sometimes if I expect too much/am a pessimist and/or maybe I'm just really, really bad at picking good workshops to attend.

Students of Color Conference 2010

All of the workshops I went to were facilitated by students, by the way.

KEYNOTE/OPENING PERFORMANCE: CLIMBING POETREE

SO GOOD. Spoken word duo. http://www.climbingpoetree.com/live/

Check them outttttttt.

WORKSHOP #1: Undocumented + LGBT

The first workshop I went to was on undocumented and LGBT students. Overall, I thought it interesting. I learned a bit. Check out http://www.dreamactivist.org/! That was a really cool project they talked about that addresses the legal concerns of undocumented LGBT students in the United States. It definitely tied together the point that immigration and LGBT issues are not mutually exclusive. Check out this particular page that addresses this well: http://www.dreamactivist.org/about/our-stories/queer-undocumented-students-await-dream/.

At this workshop, a student (not a facilitator) brought up the fact that we should also think critically about how the campaigns for LGBT rights and undocumented folks' rights are playing out. The main point they brought up was that it's problematic that both campaigns are invested in marriage and the military, and how privileged both institutions are already. The main focus of the “gay rights” movement at the moment is same-sex marriage and the repeal of DADT. Likewise, the main legal portal for becoming a permanent resident is through marriage for binational couples. Permanent residents and citizens of the United States are given the right to sponsor spouses and family members for immigration. Unfortunately, same-sex marriage is not legal so same-sex binational couples cannot access this right. So the person suggested we think about if the long-term goal/solution is to legalize same-sex marriage without considering if privileging marriage is problematic.

As discussed in the workshop by the facilitators, the Uniting American Families Act is a bill that has been proposed. If it were to pass (and it hasn't yet), it'd allow legal permanent residents and citizens to sponsor a foreign-born “permanent partner” for immigration. According to the Immigation Equality website:

to qualify as a permanent partner, a person must be able to show: (a) a relationship with another adult in which both parties intend a life-long commitment; (b) financial interdependence; (c) exclusivity; (d) inability to marry in a manner that is "cognizable" under the INA; and (e) absence of close blood relationship.

http://www.immigrationequality.org/template.php?pageid=42

Which is cool since it'd allow same-sex binational couples to sponsor their partner/be sponsored for immigration, but I suppose, as mentioned earlier, a “radical” critique would be that this still privileges those in marriage-like relationships. Why does everything rely on marriage or marriage-like situations? What about an immigrant family that doesn't look like a “traditional”, “American” nuclear family? What if there were a group of immigrant cousins with no other living relatives but lived as a family? They're not technically considered a “family” and not eligible for similar tax, employment, and medical benefits, right? I mean something like someone getting insurance benefits through a spouse's employer. See http://family.findlaw.com/marriage/marriage-basics/legal-marriage-benefits.html.

Another thing that was brought up was that if the Dream Act were passed, undocumented students who entered the United States as a minor would be eligible for a 6 year long conditional path to citizenship. See http://dreamact.info/. The conditions can be met by signing up for 2 years of college or 2 years of military service. The student who made the statement about marriage and the military just said to be critical of how the military is often used to recruit disadvantaged people of color. There are huge criticisms of the presence of recruiters on underfunded high schools. I'm sure you can find an article on it somewhere.

Anyway, these kinds of comments (marriage as an institution is problematic!) always turn into a huge argument with others that essentially implies that they're too radical and they're dividing the community by stating such things. The student didn't say that they weren't supportive of either bill, but to at least keep these things in mind. A separate person who criticized the “radical” comment did make a valid point that these kinds of short-term goals or goals that aren't necessarily perfect (marriage, repeal of DADT, UAFA, Dream Act) are necessary because undocumented and undocumented LGBT folks cannot wait around their entire lives for the perfect solution, and it might be harder for those who are privileged enough to have citizenship already to see that. Both people made good points, I thought. But there were some problems with personal attacks and people getting angry during this portion of the workshop....

Another person started talking about how it's necessary to focus on the more mainstream battles that bring more people in (marriage and repeal of DADT) because they bring more people in. They suggested they we put all of our energy into the “bigger” issues and then work on the more nuanced issues afterwards. I kind of take issue with that because it invalidates a lot of people's different experiences. It's entirely possible to work on different things simultaneously. LGBT undocumented people who risk being deported back to a country where they might be persecuted for being queer have really personal and direct threats to their own safety, and it shouldn't be a situation where they're told that the fight for same-sex marriage is more important (highly relevant too, see recent news on the UN General Assembly voting to remove sexual orientation from a resolution that protects people from executions without cause http://thenewcivilrightsmovement.com/un-general-assembly-votes-to-allow-gays-to-be-executed-without-cause/politics/2010/11/20/15449). Anyway, I honestly don't remember if this comment was addressed right away or not, but I think the facilitators kinda segued into the Dream Activist example, which indirectly addressed how problematic the above comment was since the main point of the workshop was that there are intersections between LGBT and immigration rights, but the mainstream movements within both segments treat the two as if they're mutually exclusive which shouldn't be the case.

I guess reflecting on the workshop, I came out learning a little bit, and I heard some interesting arguments from students so it wasn't bad. But I left kinda feeling underwhelmed because of the unneeded argument between students in the middle of it (implication that someone made a statement that was too radical or something), that one of the facilitators kept implying that marriage was the only way to show someone you love them (I'm sure they didn't actually mean that, though), and maybe my summary didn't capture it too well, but I swear we must've focused on marriage a lot throughout the discussion. Oh well. Also for context... my position is that no one should be barred from marriage and the military if that's what they want, but I just kinda wish there could be better alternatives.

WORKSHOP #2: Porn and Eroticism: The Exotification and Objectification of People of Color and Queer Communities

Okay, right off that bat, I could tell that I was going to regret choosing to attend this workshop. Ground rules were not discussed so people were laughing and cracking jokes throughout the entire workshop (I have a huge problem with that because I feel like porn, sex workers, and anything having to do with the adult industry aren't really taken seriously by a lot of people and mainstream media. It's hard to have a real conversation about these topics if people are going in with that mentality that this is all a joke or, "What else would you expect? It's porn, it's always degrading! End of discussion," mindset).

The facilitators were apparently both on their school government's Queer Commission, which was kind of disappointing because I expected something better because of that. Oh well. Either way, I thought it was really interesting that they have something called a Queer Commission since I feel like UC Davis' ASUCD Gender and Sexuality Commission gets some crap sometimes for doing a lot of programs and sponsorships for queer events. Usual reactions are stuff like, “Well, how does this benefit ALL students???” It benefits because people because it raises awareness and a possible outcome could be less discrimination and more “tolerance” and understanding? But I digress.

Anyway, so they started by asking what people were expecting out of the workshop or why they chose to go to this one. Most answers fell in line with learning about whatever was in the title of the workshop. Some people said they were there just to see porn.... I don't remember if it was in response to the question or later in the workshop, but someone else actually said they expected to learn some “sex tips” from the workshop... Did they really not read the workshop title? The facilitators failed to address that PORN IS NOT REALITY. Just like how HARRY POTTER IS NOT REALITY or something. Anyway, I responded to the question by saying that I just wanted to make sure that the workshop wasn't totally one-sided and the goal wasn't to say that ALL porn is bad. I said I was also hoping that they would address the possibility for empowerment through porn. It was funny because there was some silence after I said that, and then I heard a lot of, “Huh” reactions from the audience (they were more like, “Hmmmm, interesting, I never thought about that” kind of huhs). Response from a facilitator, “What do you mean by one-sided?” And... what seemed to be like a blank stare/he didn't know how to respond. I think he got what I meant, though. It just seemed like he was taken aback since they weren't actually planning on doing what I said...

Anyway, my logic is that objectification and exotification are definitely problems in a lot of porn. But it does more damage than good to only selectively talk about all the horrible things without contrasting with examples that don't participate in these problematic processes and talking about what exactly makes it problematic. Without providing contrasting examples, it doesn't really allow people to consider the possibility of porn that's not objectifying and not exotifying (although only talking about ethical porn also ignores the problems that do exist...so I'm not suggesting that either).

They even used a clip of GAIL DINES in their presentation. I don't remember what she said in the clip exactly, but it definitely wasn't something along the lines of ALL PORN IS DEGRADING!!!!!!!!!!! as she normally says, haha. But, still. I have major issues with Gail Dines in general and they failed to contexutalize her comment and anti-porn agenda.

We waited several minutes for a video clip to work. They used multiple Word documents instead of a single Powerpoint presentation to show photos (so inefficient). So anyway, they showed photos from porn DVD covers and websites and turned it in to a discussion about why these images are problematic and what makes it “okay” for such images to be distributed. All the images were examples that were OBVIOUSLY problematic. I don't remember the exact titles, but they were examples of how “mainstream” porn is totally racialized (photo of a porn shop with sections divided up as black porn, Latin porn...). There was one that said the DVD was “BLACKER” than ever or something. “There's a negro in my mom!” Hmmm other stuff like ASIAN BOYS with the stupid “Oriental” font. We didn't even break the surface of the topic. BUT! There were some good observations from audience members like that Asian males are rarely present in porn, and if they are, they're usually bottoming in gay porn... But I remember talking about this in one of the Asian American Studies classes I took... Anyway, so I guess the workshop was mostly about the problematic ways in which a lot of porn is marketed.

Someone in the audience made the odd “observation” that some of the photos of porn DVDs we looked at seemed like “high quailty porn” because they were expensive (price tag: 2 for 60 bucks or something). UHHHHHHHHHHHHH. OKAY???

People were falling asleep at this point... :/

They could've addressed constrasted the “ooh these are all horrible examples” with a discussion on what would make porn ethical and not oppressive and maybe provide examples of porn companies that are actually conscious of these problematic practices. What was needed was a discussion on the fact that the problems with a lot of porn exist at those production and marketing levels and that it's not caused by the mere fact that it's PORN (but the facilitators only focused on marketing/representation so we didn't even touch the topic of working conditions). But at this point, I was so baffled at how unprepared and how little the facilitators actually knew about the topic to raise my hand and say something and possibly be that annoying person who thinks they know everything and takes over the discussion...

The facilitators asked what some solutions could be. Most people joked about making your own porn (which is a legit answer, though). I remember a 1 second mention of queer porn from a facilitator. It was more like, “there's gay and queer porn out there that don't do these things...” But I'm not sure they really knew of any examples of queer porn... Or that “queer” can go beyond “lesbian” and “gay” (we only ever talked about straight, lesbian, and gay porn). Considering the comments some people made, I didn't get the vibe that it was a safe space for a discussion on queer porn. At a certain point, I wanted to bring up an example of contrasting images of trans folks in porn (“mainstream” vs porn that doesn't call it “she-male” porn or something). But... the environment made me kinda bleh....

One of the facilitators admitted that she didn't know much about porn.... Normally, I guess that's fine since facilitators facilitate discussions rather than lecture and provide answers. But when the facilitators proudly state that UCSB has 4 professors who teach classes all about porn, I EXPECT BETTER! Or maybe I should be worried about what the heck these professors are teaching... On that note (and I admit I'm not really doing much to help here), sex workers are always being talked about by academics who have no personal involvement with the adult industry. Soo..... I wanted to link to some blog entries from folks who are in porn and porn sites that are more conscious of allowing queers and people of color to represent themselves in ways they wish to be represented. Please suggest more!

http://crashpadseries.com/
http://www.heavenlyspire.com/

http://www.nofauxxx.com/

http://queerporn.tv

http://www.nennapresents.com/

http://www.goodforher.com/feminist_porn_awards

Random selection of relevant blog entries:

Furry Girl - Musings on ethical porn and the red herrings of "feminist porn" and "violent porn"

Drew Deveaux - Reflection on Trans Women in Porn

Sloane – Queer Porn Saved My Life

April Flores – The Women I Know

Jiz Lee – Day Dreamin With LezUrban
Shira Tarrant - Is Pornography Racist? (via Jiz Lee)

Asian/Asian American Caucus and other caucuses (closed spaces)

Well, I went to the Asian/Asian American Caucus since I identify as such. I guess it was okay.... Other than the drama at the beginning. A small group of Filipin@/Fil-Am students wanted to break off into their own caucus because they didn't identify as Asian/Asian American or necessarily Pacific Islander (there was another caucus for Pacific Islander students), which is fine. Other people thought it was fracturing the community.... I always think caucuses are awkward because I feel like people expect some superficial “yay, our experiences are all the same!!” feeling and to expect to come out feeling empowered somehow. Anyway, so the group of students left, but I was really annoyed that some students in the back yelled, "Go ahead and leave then!” :( I ended up with the discussion group on Queer API issues (what else is new?), which was interesting. 6 people or so. I guess I learned that it's pretty common for other schools to not have a club specifically for API and Queer folks. I guess Davis is pretty privileged in that way.

I heard the Mixed caucus had some problems, too, but I don't remember what my friend said about that. I also heard the ally caucus was bad (the facilitator was told last minute to facilitate it, and it wasn't even someone who has any background on issues of privilege or social justice stuff... the person called it the “white caucus”......). It turned into a HUGE argument between two groups of people. One basically said that all white people are inherently racist and should just admit it, and another group of folks lamented that they were tired of talking about white privilege or didn't want to admit that they themselves were privileged (uhhhhhhhh everyone is privileged one way or another....). Oh my, my girlfriend left early because it turned into a really problematic shitstorm. Someone else from the Davis delegation reported back about how terrible that caucus was, too. Yikes, I guess my issue with conferences is that the only way of debriefing and letting the organizers know about these problems are on the evaluation forms at the end of the conference. I kinda wish there was a designated time for people to debrief (and vent) about the workshops.... besides via the evaluation forms which I doubt many people filled out... because there were some people who seriously thought that caucus was good in the end. Okay, I wasn't there, so I don't really know. But from what I heard, none of these issues were really addressed properly, and that really worries me.

I only heard good things about the People of African Descent caucus and the First People/Native American caucus (which almost didn't happen and was planned last minute, I heard).

BLAH I really dislike caucuses. The only really good caucus I've been to was the genderqueer caucus at Western Regional.

Workshop #3: Papaya Soap: Deeper Than Your Skin, Broader Than Your Nose

Ohhhhhh this workshop was so good! It was about skin whitening and the media's influence on representation and perception of Filipin@ beauty ideals. They had a well-thought out powerpoint with historical background on Spanish colonization and related that to these beauty ideals. Lots of audience members shared stories of family members saying they were “too dark” or had noses that were too flat. SOOO many people shared stories, I was so surprised to hear how common these comments were . Very interesting. Ended on such a positive note, too. Someone made a kickass speech about loving our own bodies. *snaps* Yeah, too bad it was the only good workshop I went to. Maybe I need to learn how to pick better workshops.

Other things:

Wandered around during the open session (I wanted to go to the Queer API caucus but it was cancelled). GOT SOME KOREAN BBQ TACOS AT KOGILICIOUS. I've always wanted to try some, and I was NOT disappointed.

The hoagie place sells DELICIOUS cheese fries.

I am so glad that I didn't choose to attend UCSB because I really wasn't feelin' the campus or the nearby “town” (Isla Vista). I thought it was a SoCal vibe I was getting, but someone else explained that it's just UCSB/Central California vibe. I like it here in Northern California, thank you very much.

My roommates (my girlfriend + 2 others) were hilarious and we had some good conversations about the conference as well as other silly things.

X: “I just Twattered it.” Me: “I guess I'll go look at your twat...” X: “SAY THAT AGAIN!” (Twitter.. if you didn't get that).

X: “Which workshop did you go to?” Me: “The porn one.” X: “You would!”

X: “Don't tell me what to do!” (and something like-- “So demanding!)” Y: “You like it.” Z: “Jeffer's like that too [demanding]”

Z (to X and Y): “Wow, you two should be in porn.”

I AM SO TIRED OF MOTEL 6. MY POOR BACK! STUPID BEDS.

I drank an entire 5 Hour Energy to stay awake on the drive back since I ended up being the navigator for the driver. Um... I was wide awake for way longer than 5 hours. The drive was only 6.5 hours. We got home at like... 9:30... I don't think I fell asleep until 1 AM eventhough I could barely keep myself awake around 3 PM (right before we left).

Planning on attending Western Regional again in 2011 since it's at UC Berkeley. Also at UCB is Cal Q&A Conference (Cal Queer and Asian), which, ODDLY, I have yet to attend eventhough it's my 4th year in college and it's always at UCB. SOOOO I hope those experiences will be better....dot dot dot....

Davis is Burning - Drag Tina Turner!

2010-11-05T21:12:00.001-07:00

Preview #2, originally uploaded by jeffersaurusrex.

One more photo.
November 4, 2010
Freeborn Hall, UC Davis

Preview Pic - Drag Nicki Minaj!

2010-11-05T00:31:00.001-07:00

Preview Pic, originally uploaded by jeffersaurusrex.

November 4, 2010
Delta Lambda Phi presents... Davis Is Burning
DRAG NICKI MINAJ!

Sex and "Being Naked" Are Not Valid Activities or Interests

2010-06-12T11:09:00.000-07:00

...According to Facebook. Someone confirm this for me, please. I felt like updating my profile and wanted to add "being naked" to the list, but it kept disappearing after I saved. I figured that it was either censoring "inappropriate" activities or that there has to be a group that exists with that title already (since interests and such now also link to separate pages). I don't know. SO, I decided to test some out.

Masturbating, fucking, and sex also do not work.

But then I decided to try really obscure things that could not possibly have pages that already exist.
Killing raccoons and setting them on fire, putting my friends' organs in a blender, eating raccoons on my birthday, fisting lesbians, and watching porn all work.

WHAT? I can fist lesbians, but I can't fuck, masturbate, have sex, or be naked? How does that make sense?

Dirty sex also does not work. I think they are filtering out certain words because I can put "watching porn" but not "watching porn with sex scenes."

OH, FACEBOOK. *slaps you*

This has to be the poorest attempt at censorship (or something?) ever. Fisting lesbians but not being naked. I'm not knocking "fisting lesbians" (because that can be fun), but on most people's scales of "inappropriateness", that's probably more inappropriate than being naked. Inappropriate meaning... a parent would not want their child to read that. I don't know.

Edit:
Works: Penis, safe sex, unsafe sex, sex while married, sex with multiple partners, POL POT
Does not work: Vagina, blowjobs, cunnilingus, HITLER, Nazis

WHAT, I don't get it!

Who wants to add to the list?

There's Something About Film

2010-06-02T18:58:00.001-07:00

06170002, originally uploaded by jeffersaurusrex.

From Memorial Day weekend. As you may (or may not...) know, my Canon Digital Rebel's autofocus randomly stopped working at the Goodriddler CD Release show (which I posted about a few blog entries ago). So.... If I can get a job over the summer and make enough money, I really want buy a used Canon 5D (the first one). But that's wishful thinking because my summer schedule isn't really convenient for potential employers since I'm taking several classes. :(

Anyway, since my Digital Rebel is kind of broken and it's really hard to use manual focus with such a tiny field of view on a crop camera, I've been shooting in film again. I have a couple of rolls of black and white film to develop, but I need access to a darkroom first... In the meantime, I've had some color film developed at CVS (because I don't know how to do that myself). This was one of the pictures.

I don't know why, but I just really like how film looks. The photo itself is really nothing special. But as my partner said, I think it captures his happiness and his craziness/silliness perfectly. Even if the highlights are overblown, it's a little blurry, and the colors are a bit off.... It still LOOKS more interesting than digital. Hmm.

Canon A2
50mm f/1.8 II
Fujifilm Super HQ 200 (expired in 2005)

Ethnic Studies Rally @ Hart Hall, UC Davis 5/26/2010

2010-06-01T00:15:00.001-07:00

06170017, originally uploaded by jeffersaurusrex.

Androgyny. It is awesome.

2010-05-21T10:46:00.000-07:00

Eleanor Jackson of the English "electropop/synthpop" duo La Roux.

http://awmusic.ca/2009/09/30/la-roux-la-roux/

(can't find a photo credit... sorry! please tell me if you know...)

The Cause of the UC Budget Crisis

2010-05-11T19:43:00.001-07:00

I found out where all of our money has been going:

Hah, just kidding. But really, they added our school logo to the waffle makers in the dining commons. What a silly use of money.

Goodriddler CD release show @ The Phoenix Theater, Petaluma, CA

2010-05-08T21:36:00.000-07:00

Preview pictures (The Velvet Teen, Iditarod)

Ahhhh. I went to the Goodriddler CD release show last night (Friday, 5/7/2010). I actually had never heard of Goodriddler. I mostly went to go see The Velvet Teen since I haven't seen them since 2003 at the Slowdance Records showcase also at the Phoenix... back when Logan Whitehurst was in the band. :(

Of the 6 bands that played, I had only heard of The Velvet Teen, Not To Reason Why, and The Americas. I've been really out of the loop on all the great Sonoma County bands since I've been living in Davis for school. All the bands were excellent. I had a great time, although I went by myself... So sad. However, I did run into someone who I hadn't seen in... 7 years? Yay.

Bands playing last night: The Americas, The Crux, Iditarod, The Velvet Teen, Not To Reason Why, and Goodriddler.

Anyway, so the first band to play was The Americas. In between bands (in the above order), The Crux would play in the lobby. Iditarod did a song about... being Harry Potter. And I think there was a song about Raptor naps. I don't remember. But they were hilarious. I don't know how to describe them. Maybe math rock with Nintendo sounds/synths and geeky jokes. Ok, this is why I'm not a music reviewer. Sorry.

The Crux were really cool, too. Folky. If you like Jason Webley, you might like them. Not folky in the traditional sense. They easily fit into the lineup of indie/experimental/instrumental/rockin' goodness.

Quote from a review of the band by Gabe Meline in The Bohemian:

One weekend," Dixon posits, "we'll play a Pyrate Punx show where

there'll be a bunch of drunk punks, and the next weekend we'll be at a

know-your-neighborhood community-organizing event with a bunch of

middle-aged activists, drinking wine and eating cheese." The variety

isn't an accident, but rather a result of the band's ideal of artists

as connectors, of intersecting paths, of, as it were, a crux. "Being an

independent artist doesn't mean you're cut off from the community,"

says Stithem. "It means you know how to interact with your

environment."

The Americas were great. The Velvet Teen were amaaaaaaaaaaazing as usual. There were some new songs... Well, songs I didn't recognize, anyway. Of the ones I recognized (and remember), they did Radiapathy (yesss), Tokyoto.....uhhhhhhhhhhh... I don't remember anymore. I'm pretty sure they did some more songs from Cum Laude, though... Oh, Not To Reason Why played on the floor to my left right after The Velvet Teen, but by that point there were tons of people crowding around. For their entire set, I couldn't see anyone in the band. So ended up wandering around... Sara Sanger (The New Trust) was selling merch for The Velvet Teen. Oh, at point, either my 50mm lens got smudged or broke because whenever I tried to focus, I saw two of everything and it can't accurately autofocus. Uh oh...

Goodriddler was good........... except I had to leave during the first song.... :( Random humorous moment of the night: Matthew Izen of The Velvet Teen was carrying his baby (well, I assume it was his baby) around before the show started. Baby had mega soundproof headphone things on (don't wanna ruin their hearing!). SO CUTE. Haha.

The Crux

_________________
The Americas

__________

__________

Iditarod

_________________

The Velvet Teen

_________________

Not To Reason Why

_________________

Goodriddler

More pictures up on my Flickr page: http://www.flickr.com/photos/jgiang/sets/72157623896769241/

Pork Shoulder for Dinner.

2010-04-26T23:11:00.000-07:00

It was in the oven for 9-10 hours.... Ohhhhhhh yeah! Skin is nice and crispy. Started at around 1PM. Seasoned it with salt and pepper, some garlic powder and some chili flakes. Seared it and put it in the oven at 325 degrees F for an hour, added chicken broth and onions... changed my mind about which recipe to follow and decided to turn it down to 275 degrees. Ashley turned it up to 350 towards the last half hour (didn't want to turn it up to 400 because it might've burned...). And pulled it out at around 10:15PM after I got back from class.

Oxford Circle Park at Night

2010-04-24T19:42:00.000-07:00

4/23/2010

Transgender Student Attacked at CSU Long Beach

2010-04-23T17:14:00.000-07:00

As the title says, a transgender student was attacked recently at CSULB. I could only find a few posts about this.... no official statements from the university or anything.

http://schalosangeles.wordpress.com/2010/04/23/request-for-solidarity-letterssupport-for-escalation-of-racisthomophobic-threats-and-transphobic-violence/

"*From Clarissa*:

*i have some bad news tambien to share with you, i’ll post something on it today on facebook and if you could also share with folks.* *there was a recent escalation of the violence at csulb, we’re gathering with some new students to talk about how to organize against the stuff we’ve been dealing and this new attack: a trans student left class [one] night to go to the bathroom and on the way there was assaulted by someone who knew [X] by name but whom [X] didnt know. he beat [X] and threw [X] against a wall then carved “It” on [X's] chest with a knife.*"

And the following quote is from the only report I've seen about it that's not from a blog (another person posted about it on their blog, too, if you would like to read: http://vegina.wordpress.com/). When are mainstream media sources going to pick up this story? From the Long Beach Post with a suspect sketch:
http://www.lbpost.com/ryan/9421

"Updated 4:30pm | The university has released a statement and a sketch of the suspect in last week's attack on a 27-year old transgender student on campus. The sketch is above. The suspect is described as a male in his 20's either 5'9 or 5'10, with light complexion and dark hair. The incident occurred in the men's restroom on the west side of the KKJZ building.

"University Police strongly believe this was an isolated incident and that there is no additional threat to the campus community," reads a statement from the university."

Isolated incident, my ass. Violence against trans folks is a huge problem. Example (if you haven't been following the Duanna Johnson case): http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5gUMAI4X7kRIn2qsipft8hUtF-aIAD9F6D0KO0, http://angrybrownbutch.com/2008/11/13/duanna-johnson/

And I remember this incident being mentioned in one of my classes. Ruby Molina's body found in the American River in 2008. http://questioningtransphobia.wordpress.com/2008/09/25/update-to-dead-trans-woman-in-sacramento/, http://transgriot.blogspot.com/2008/09/ruby-molina-is-her-name.html

EDIT: More on the CSULB incident here: http://www.lbreport.com/news/apr10/csusup.htm

Remember How I Hate Picnic Day? Picnic Day Might Be Cancelled Forever!

2010-04-22T08:47:00.000-07:00

Read the whole thing here: http://www.mercurynews.com/breaking-news/ci_14929152

I kind of blamed the frats in one of the posts when I mentioned how homophobic/sexist/racist Picnic Day can be... but, yeah, a lot of people come in from out of town, too, and generally speaking, I still think that the excessive drinking and hypermasculinity is not a good combo. There are students from Davis, non-students, blah blah blah. Either way, as this article says, there's essentially 2 Picnic Days: families on campus, idiots off campus drinking all day and being annoying. Davis residents often leave town for the weekend to avoid all this BS.

Quote:

Weekend's rowdiness may bring end to UC Davis' 96-year-old Picnic Day

By Gina Kim and Hudson Sangree
Sacramento Bee
Posted: 04/21/2010 12:31:18 PM PDT
Updated: 04/21/2010 12:43:09 PM PDT

UC Davis may yank the blanket out from under Picnic Day after the 96th annual university open house ended with street brawls, groped women, thrown furniture and an injured police officer.

There were 516 calls for service and 33 arrests this weekend — more than twice the number from previous years.

"All options are on the table," Gary Sandy, the university's director of local government relations, said Tuesday. "The campus community is appalled that these sorts of activities are taking place."

I mean, if there's a way to get rid of the off campus BS (Uh.... how? I saw at least 6 fire trucks being called somewhere Picnic Day evening... and 33 arrests? Bars not cooperating to stop with the Picnic Day deals...) and for ASUCD to reconsider funding for other important events and programs and events, too, then by all means save Picnic Day. But as it stands, I feel like $15000 a year (from student fees) to Picnic Day and NOT taking action against all the things that are problematic with it but always bickering about funding for great programs like ethnic and Lavender graduations is a little silly.

Gay Gay Gay Gay

2010-04-17T23:39:00.000-07:00

I had an encounter with an annoying person today.

It's still Picnic Day... A few of us were standing in line for Davis Dance Revolution. It's a competition for different dance groups on campus that happens every year in the evening of Picnic Day. There are two categories-- traditional and modern. Groups compete for $1000. Example from last year--

(Tinikling, which is a Pilipino traditional dance).

ANYWAY. This guy behind me in line was talking to his friends, yapping about how this guy he knew was "hella gay", "sounded gay", and I swear, he described him as "gay" at least 5 more times. I got so annoyed that I finally turned around and said, "Can you please stop saying that?" He ignored me. "SERIOUSLY, stop using 'gay' like that." Ignored me some more. But I could tell at least one of his friends was getting uncomfortable and a bit embarrassed.

Then Ashley stepped in. "Was he actually gay?"
"No. I'm just saying he sounded gay."
"Do I sound gay?"
"No."
"Well I am. You can't just say someone SOUNDED gay."
"I'm just saying..." I don't remember what he said, more excuses. "Whatever, I wasn't even talking to you."
"Well I'm just saying that I can HEAR you, so can you stop?"
"Freedom of speech."
"What does it say that your friends aren't even defending you?" (They looked REALLY embarrassed at this point).
"I don't need them to defend me." And then he continued talking to his friends.

SO ANNOYING. He kept blabbering about that same guy sounding/acting/whatevering GAY GAY GAY. He eventually sold his ticket to someone and decided not to go to the event and told his friends he didn't wanna go and said they were being "bitches" anyway (something like that). I have a feeling he got annoyed that his friends didn't stick up for him.

HAH.

I Hate Poorly Designed Studies and Poorly Written Articles - "Kids attracted to gender-specific toys"

2010-04-16T15:15:00.000-07:00

I don't know anything about this site. All it says is:

"Canoe.ca is a leading local and national interactive media provider of news, entertainment and services, helping to inform and connect Canadians."

But it's where I read this brilliant example of stupid:

"There could be a biological reason why boys love to play with toy trucks and girls prefer their dolls, British researchers say.

Dr. Brenda Todd and her student Sara Amalie O'Toole Thommessen from City University London studied 90 infants between the ages of nine months to 36 months and concluded children choose to play with gender-specific toys from the moment they can first crawl."

http://lifewise.canoe.ca/Living/2010/04/16/13611591-qmi.html

Oh, but did they ever consider the fact that babies are socialized from the second that they're BORN? There was also some study awhile ago that did something similar with monkeys or something, and the researchers concluded that the male monkeys preferred the boy's toys and the female monkeys preferred the girls' toys. Or something. Problem one--- I assume they're monkeys that have been held in captivity... which, again, means they're not really perfect subjects. I don't know if that's what they did, but I have to assume that they didn't chuck balls, trucks, and pots and pans at wild monkeys. Second-- the researchers are biased because they automatically categorized the "toys" a particular way and gendered them. I don't know, maybe female monkeys like things with handles. Doesn't mean they've been destined to forever cook for their monkey husbands and that male monkeys are totally awesome at sports because they like balls. There are many possible interpretations. . .

But I don't know if the extra tidbit about how it may be biological was added by the author of the article or was stated by the researchers. It's possible that the researchers were actually making a point that children are socialized in gendered ways at a very young age but the author interpreted this to be a biological thing... Either way, this is either a poorly written article or a problematic study. Or both.

I've Got Love For You If You Were Born In The 80s

2010-04-11T15:23:00.000-07:00

Calvin Harris - Acceptable in the 80s

This is my jam. Please don't ever play it because I'll have to ask you to replay it about 5 times and I might bust out my horrible dance moves. Who wants to do "The Sprinkler" with me? Just kidding, I don't do that. I might flail my arms or something, though.

P.S. I was born in '89. I'm not sure how old I am in this picture. All I know was that I got 3rd place or something for being chubby.

It was acceptable in the 80s! It was acceptable at the tiiiiime...

Wikipedia and the Absence of Articles on Queer Porn

2010-04-09T17:35:00.000-07:00

Okay, yeah it's Wikipedia, but I have a point!

I was bored and decided to browse through Wikipedia the other day. Read about some bands, read about which bands Emy Storey designs stuff for, remembered that I wanted her mustache shirt but it's 30 dollars so maybe I'll get it as a gift for myself when it's closer to my birthday, then I wondered if some of my favorite queer porn stars have a Wikipedia page (I don't really know how I went from mustache shirt to porn, but whatever). They don't. Not surprising, but I did find a short stub about Pink and White Productions. Then, I clicked on the discussion page, to find that the stub for Pink and White has a ranking of "Low-importance." Curious, I clicked on the page and read about the importance scale designated for articles about porn.

Low-importance:

"Subjects not very well known inside or outside pornography. Most of the articles that barely squeaked by Wikipedia:Articles for deletionborderline notability (won one award, was Playmate of the Month, and nothing more) would be low importance. Any actor or actress who has not won multiple pornography awards and has not been discussed in multiple mainstream media sources must be rated low importance." (Italicized for emphasis)

So what qualifies a topic as top-importance?

"These articles would be on a very limited number of subjects of utmost notability within pornography, and very well-known even outside pornography. In other words, they have many in depth newspaper articles, academic journal articles, documentaries or books from both mainstream and porn sources devoted to them. Under no circumstances should any individual person be assigned top importance."

Ok, I guess the top-importance ranking is reserved for broader topics such as "Pornography, History of erotic depictions." Let's check out the other rankings:

High-importance:

"Subjects very important within pornography, and well-known outside pornography. For pornstars we recommend the top 50 list compiled by AVN: as they seem to mostly match the Key articles for Wikipedia 1.0 section, where we were asked to list our most important articles; and the Key articles for Wikipedia 1.0 section. Any performer not on this list must be the subject of several books, mainstream newspaper articles or academic journal articles."

Mid-importance:

"Subjects well known inside pornography. As a rule of thumb, require two or more non-trivial articles written about them outside pornography, important pornography awards (including AVN Awards AVN Hall of Fame or XRCO Hall of Fame, have multiple important awards, or have been mentioned in multiple books, mainstream newspaper articles or academic journal articles." etc.), or combination thereof. For an actor or actress to be mid importance they must be a member of the

What I problematic is in using the AVN (Adult Video News) awards as a signifier of importance. But let me clarify something-- first of all, I'm actually not a big porn connoisseur nor do I claim to know that much about porn or the porn industry. I have 4 queer porn DVDs, all of which were bought within the last year. I don't watch porn that often, but I've been really fascinated lately with queer porn for several reasons. The pornographic aspect is kind of secondary (in terms of my interest in these films) to the gender politics that's present in these films. I've been really interested in how fluid different genders and sexualities in particular are portrayed in queer porn. I've also noticed that the general sentiment in mainstream media is that all porn is bad and degrading towards women, but I don't think that's true at all. I remember an episode of Dr. Phil (yeah, yeah... it's Dr. Phil) where one woman mentioned that she became a porn actress, and Dr. Phil berated her for degrading herself. I mean, it's probably true since the mainstream porn industry has its own issues, but it's entirely possible for there to be feminist porn and that never really gets brought up in popular discourses on porn.

I found an interview that Gram Ponante did with Alison Lee, manager of Good for Her, which puts on the Feminist Porn Awards in Toronto. The event is actually happening tonight. Check it out here: http://gramponante.com/feminist-porn-awards-return-to-toronto/

Some good quotes:

Alison Lee: "The Feminist Porn Awards also show feminists who would write off all porn as exploitation that it’s not just images of sex that are inherently demeaning – it’s bad working conditions and crappy porn whose only purpose is to show women as objects to be used that is bad news. Porn can be raunchy and rough, it can be tender and sweet, and no matter what, can show women in control of their desires, and it doesn’t mean that anybody in the equation – the performers, the viewers, the directors – are exploiting anyone. Porn can be awesome, and we just want to encourage people to think about the porn that they are consuming and how they are making it."

...

"Tristan Taormino once called the Feminist Porn Awards as “The Independent Spirit Awards of the porn world”, and I think that is an apt description, especially if we consider the AVN Awards as “The Oscars of Porn”."

Porn CAN be powerful! It can be sex-positive and body-positive. I feel like queer porn made by producers/filmmakers such as Shine Louise Houston (http://www.pinkwhite.biz/) and Courtney Trouble (http://nofauxxx.com/) are very important even if the it's not quite as mainstream and widely known as the stuff typically seen at the AVN awards. As Lee's quote mentions, the AVN Awards are like "The Oscars of Porn." I don't know a whole lot about the Oscars, so let me use the Grammy's as an example. What does it tell us about the mainstream music industry that Taylor Swift can win a Grammy, but never bands like Sleater-Kinney? Similarly, the number of AVN awards and how much mainstream press coverage that porn stars and companies have received doesn't tell me a whole lot about their importance, significance, or impact. For Wikipedia's high-importance ranking, it said, "Any performer not on this list [AVN top 50] must be the subject of several books, mainstream newspaper articles or academic journal articles." Does that mean I should go to grad school and write my dissertation on queer porn for it to be considered important?

Using the music example again-- for me, feminist bands like Sleater-Kinney were really empowering to listen to, especially when I found out about them in high school. I wore my S-K "Show Me Your Riffs" shirt all the time (a response to the sexist "show me your tits" chants at concerts). It was really reaffirming to be able to identify with bands that were as pissed as I was about sexism in the music industry and beyond. That, and they were totally sex-positive too. Like I've said before... If an orgasm were a song, it'd be Sleater-Kinney's "Let's Call It Love." Someone please make a pornographic music video for the song, haha (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4T08bEUbV8k).

Anyway, just because queer porn would be categorized as low-importance on Wikipedia simply because it's not quite "mainstream" doesn't mean it's not relevant and powerful. And hierarchical ranking systems like that are always something I really dislike. Yes, it's "just" Wikipedia, and maybe this is that class discussion about postmodernist epistemologies running through my head right now, but who's to say what's important or not? Why use the AVN awards to determine this-- aren't there other ways to determine relevance without quantifying it with number of awards won? The bigger point is... quantifying importance is problematic because that's totally subjective. Different things have different impacts on different people. And maybe this is a totally random tangent, but I also hate the hierarchical nature of government systems. Specifically, I'm on my school government's Gender and Sexuality Commission. Yeah, we don't have the voting power of Senators, but we maneuver in different ways. We work for communities that are underrepresented. We make sure the privileges that the rest of the members in the student government aren't left unchecked. Well, try to.... Hah.

So... my point is... It's really problematic to base a pornographic topic's importance on how much AVN recognizes it...

For my next entry (maybe... eventually), I have a story to ramble about on the meaning of "queer." As a friend said earlier today, there's a difference between homosexual and queer, too....That and it's not just about sexual orientation (which is a separate rant about a club on campus I'm a part of). Something to ponder 'til my next rambling mess of a blog entry.

10 Things I Learned at the Jiz Lee Photoshoot

2010-04-02T12:19:00.000-07:00

On March 21, I had the really great opportunity of being one of several photographers to shoot genderqueer porn star extraordinaire Jiz Lee as part of hir Karma Pervs fundraiser project. It's porn for a cause. How cool is that? Last month, the proceeds went to the STOP AIDS Project. For April, the proceeds will be going to the Center For Sex and Culture, which was actually where the photo shoot that I got to be a part of was located. For the price of membership, starting at $7.99 for 30 days, you get access to an exclusive photo set, a private blog post, and more for each month. More info from Jiz's site about this particular shoot:

"About the Photographers & the Shoot: Dr. Robert Martin Lawrence runs a photo club that holds monthly Erotic Photography Workshops at the Center for Sex & Culture (SexandCulture.org), which was co-founded by Robert and Dr. Carol Queen, Ph.D. This month's donations will go to the CSC, which is holding its annual Masturbate-a-Thon (Masturbate-a-thon.com) on May 30th. I'll be a featured performer!"

I heard about the shoot through Jiz's blog, and was actually a little hesitant to sign up for it at first. Photography is really just a hobby for me (my favorite hobby!), and I've never really taken photos in a studio setting. I imagined that I would be surrounded by people who actually knew what they were doing and then I'd be the clueless baby photographer. Plus, I always feel silly when I might meet celebrities (?) and stuff. I'm going to embarrass myself a bit just to prove my point:

Me with Tegan and Sara in 2008. So awkward!

What the hell am I wearing??!?? What's up with my hair?

Yuck. I promise you I don't look like that anymore.

And I really hope I'm not that awkward these days...

(P.S. my friend Jaymes made those popsicles, hehe).

Soooo, I would much rather take pretty pictures that do not include me in them. How do I learn how to take better photos? PRACTICE! So I decided to get over it and purchase a ticket to the photo shoot since I hadn't really used my camera a whole lot as of late, but it was also up to my partner because she has a car and I don't. Soooooo I got her a ticket too! She didn't take any pictures, but she held my camera bag and handed me my water bottle when I got thirsty. :D Thanks for driving! <3

Anywho, the photoshoot was quite a learning experience for me. I wasn't really sure what to expect. I mean, Jiz's blog post mentioned that it was an "erotic photography workshop." And that's I all I really knew. I mean, yeah, I'm familiar with hir work in queer porn (The Crash Pad, Champion, etc.). But.. I don't know? "Erotic photography workshop" still sounded kind of vague to me. *shrugs*

My guess was that there was actually a good range of photography experience among the 8 of us. One guy had a Canon 5D MK II, I think, and a case full of equipment. And there I was with my tiny Canon Digital Rebel.... So anyway, to sum up the shoot real quick-- there was a play on the "money shot", there was a stripper pole, and some other fun stuff, haha.

10 things I learned from the Jiz Lee photoshoot

1) Do not eat grasshopper tacos before the photoshoot. I am serious. Context: Spring break had just started for me the day before the shoot, so my partner and I left for home (Sonoma County) from Davis on that Saturday. Since we were driving all the way to San Francisco the following day (okay, not "all the way" since it's just an hour and a half drive from home), we decided to make a day out of it and met up with one of our friends. We decided to grab some food someplace nearby. Said friend and I thought it'd be a brilliant idea to be our food-adventurous selves and go ahead and try some grasshopper tacos. Needless to say, my tummy felt a little funny for awhile, and we totally saw a leg move. Moral of the story: don't try new things before doing something important such as a taking photos for Jiz Lee's fundraiser project.

Grasshopper taco. I'm sorry if you like

eating these, but it just wasn't for me.

2) Show up on time. That way, you won't be out of breath running to the place, thus making yourself look like a fool. Just kidding. But really. The shoot was supposed to start at 4, I think we parked 5 minutes til 4. It also doesn't help if you don't know what the place looks like if you're gonna be late. But I guess it's not my fault that there's no sign..just a purple awning with the address number, if I remember correctly. Anyway, we ran upstairs... got there just in time! And then I realized that we weren't really late because a few other photographers weren't there yet either, and Jiz and 2 or so other people were just chillin' and talking in the hallway. My clumsy-out-of-breath-self-from-running-because-I-was-late ended up knocking over Jiz's bike. Oops. Sorry! How embarrassing. Lesson here: try not to do that.

3) BE PREPARED. First of all, I forgot to change the batteries to my flash so that ended up being pretty useless because it took forever for it to recharge after each fire. Second, I barely even knew how to use it because I got it fairly recently. It's also a manual flash (LumoPro 120), and like I said, I don't really have any experience in a studio setting.... soooo I just took it off after getting so frustrated with it and my inability to use it properly. THIRD, I forgot to clean my 50mm f/1.8 II lens. It's my only good lens, since the other one I have is just the kit lens. Not only that, I don't have a lens hood. Combined with the bright studio lights that I'm not used to, there was a lot of lens flare whenever I tried to use the 50mm lens. Needless to say, I had to use my kit lens. So depressing.

3) Photography is HARD WORK! Just speaking for myself, I was running around and laying on the floor at weird angles trying to get good shots for the two hours or however long it was. I'm always learning more about photography and my camera, so I was probably noodling around with the settings far too often. I don't know about everyone else, but all that rolling around on the floor made me sweaty and gross, too (bring a water bottle!). Oh yeah, this kind of goes with number 2 as well. Because I was messing with the settings and failing at life so much, a lot of the pictures from the beginning of the shoot turned out too dark. BOO. Thank Jebus for Photoshop.

4) If possible, SHOOT IN RAW FORMAT. I normally would shoot in RAW because it's so much easier to post-process with, but my Digital Rebel model came out in 2003. It's very, VERY slow. Even when shooting in JPEG, it sometimes takes 3-5 seconds to preview a picture. Longer for RAW. Not to mention it shoots in burst mode at 2.5 fps.. max 4 pictures. I'm guessing that's just for JPEG. Probably slower for RAW. ARGH!!!! So, JPEG it is (I ended up taking about 520 pictures...).

5) In a professional setting, it's probably a good idea to use professional equipment. I made a grid spot for my flash out of a graham cracker box, black straws, gaffers tape, and Elmer's glue. I didn't use it at the shoot, but I did realize that the straws were starting to fall off when I went through my camera bag. I think my flash melted the glue.

DIY grid spot- good for playing with,

but not necessarily reliable.

6) Jiz is pro with the stripper pole. How do people even stay on those things? If rolling around on the floor and taking pictures was tiring for me, I can't imagine how much of a workout it was on the pole.

7) Shooting in a studio setting is kind of difficult for me because it makes me uncomfortable to have to tell people (models) what to do. The only time that I can recall having to do that was when I took some of my friends' senior pictures back in high school. I don't know???? At this shoot, it was fine though. I let the other photographers do their thing and I just kept taking pictures. Oh well!

8) I want to upgrade my camera equipment!!! :( I love new toys.... Speaking of toys, a shiny stainless steel dildo like the Njoy Eleven would be cool too. ---> http://jizlee.com/wordpress/aprils-karma-pervs-sex-and-culture/ (NSFW)

9) Jiz Lee is nice.

10) Studio photography, nonetheless, is something that I could definitely learn more about.

(Sorry, I kind of ran out of ideas for the last few).

And one thing I still do not understand-- how does anyone ejaculate that much fluid?!!! Metaphorically, if I were a creek, Jiz would be a waterfall. Major exaggeration, of course. I am sorry if you know me and just read that. Either way, totally awesome.

So that was my take on that photo shoot. It was fun. It was good practice and a great learning experience. I am glad that I got to be a part of this. I don't really get opportunities like this back in Davis (but if anyone wants pictures of squirrels and ducks, I can do that). If I were in the Bay Area more often and weren't also a poor college student, I would sign up to be a member of CSC's Photo Club!

So if you wanna see the beautiful pictures that came from this photoshoot, make sure to sign up for Karma Pervs and go to the members section. You can also check out Jiz's blog post for a preview picture (not my picture, though). If you wanna see my photos (and donate to the Center for Sex and Culture), sign up! NSFW, by the way... as if I needed to tell you.

P.S. I just realized that half of my body is in one of the pictures, hahaha. Anonymous person's 2nd picture... that's me in the yellow shirt putting away the coins. Silly. Anon's pictures are totally awesome. Whoa!

Actually, all the pics turned out great. :)

Super old picture...

2010-03-27T16:42:00.000-07:00

I have a fascination with silhouettes...

February 9, 2006 (meaning junior year in high school, haha)
de Young Museum
San Francisco, CA

I was going through some old pictures on my Flickr account. This was taken with my very first digital camera... An old Canon Powershot A60 POINT AND SHOOT! 2 megapixels! Isn't that crazy? It's kind of a terrible camera, but it actually had a fully manual option as well as aperture and shutter priorities. So despite its poor quality, I actually was able to use it early in high school (no way my parents would've bought me a DSLR) and teach myself a little bit of the basics... Now I have a Canon Digital Rebel, though the very first model. So even that's really old. This picture is just a random one that I liked at the time that I took coming up from the stairs at the de Young Museum in San Francisco.

Why is this not surprising? "Trans Student Suspended from Same School in Mississippi That Canceled Prom, Later Hounded Out of Town "

2010-03-26T19:47:00.000-07:00

I reposted a link about the prom situation over at Itawamba Agricultural High School a few entries ago. Just caught a post by Dan Savage saying that it wasn't the first time this year that the ACLU was contacted by a student from the same school. Title kind of sums it up. Read the rest here.

I take that back-- Carrie Brownstein and Janet Weiss are NOT in a new band.

2010-03-26T18:28:00.000-07:00

I guess the IFC interview exaggerated a bit:

Pitchfork: I saw the interview you did with IFC. It's interesting that the exact moment when your movie makes its way out into the world is also when we're finding out that you're doing music again.

Carrie Brownstein: [laughs] Well, I feel like the reports of that were greatly exaggerations. I did do some work with Janet for a documentary film last summer. That's not really a band. I enlisted her to help me with that, and we wrote a couple songs for it that will only be put out with this movie. The way that it came across in the edit of the interview made it sound like I had this new band. Yes, I was excited to play some music last summer, and that definitely got me kind of back in the mindframe of wanting to play music again. But certainly I wouldn't want to... I mean, it was for a film project.

Pitchfork: Can you say what the film is?

CB: It's by Lynn Hershman Leeson, an artist that was big in the 70s in the women's art movement. She's made a pretty interesting documentary about the whole revolutionary women's art movement in the 70s, whether it was the Guerrilla Girls or some more fringe artists. I shouldn't even say fringe; they were fringe only because that's where they were deposited in the art scene. But she's made a pretty thorough documentary about that, and she asked me to write some original songs for it. I started out writing on my own, then enlisted Janet, who is a great arranger, to help me out. Then we had Tucker Martine as a producer; he does the Decemberists' stuff. He's a local Portland guy, and he recorded it. It was a really fun process to just be playing again, and when I was thinking of who to get on drums-- it's hard to have ever played with Janet Weiss and think you can play with another drummer, so I'm at a disadvantage. I always need to play with her. Otherwise, I feel something's lacking.

The rest of the interview is over at Pitchfork. So... does that mean a Sleater-Kinney reunion is still possible? I'll end with one of my favorite songs of theirs. It's totally about orgasms. Am I right, or am I right?

Sleater-Kinney - "Get Up"

Directed by the awesomeness that is Miranda July.

Sleater-Kinney - "Get Up"

And when the body finally starts to let go
let it all go at once
not piece by piece.
but like a whole bucket of stars
dumped into the universe.
Whoooh! Watch it go!
Good-bye small hands, good-bye small heart
good-bye small head
My soul is climbing tree trunks
and swinging from every branch

They're calling on me,
they're calling one me...

Do you think I'm an animal?
Am I not?
Do you like fur
Do you wanna come over
Are we captive only for a short time
Is there splendor, I'm not ashamed
Desire shoots through me
like birds singing
(The way you move no ocean's waves were ever as fluid)

They're calling on me,
they're calling one me...

I hit the mark!
I target moon, I target sky, I target sun.
Fall down on the world before it falls on you.

Like beggars, like Stars,
like whores, us all
Like beggars, like dogs
Like Stars, us all

Shoot straight for my heart
(And when you were near no sky was ever quite so clear)

Like stars, so small
Like us. when we fall
Like beggars, like whores
Like lovers, Get Up!
Get up...too far.

Bay Area Girls Rock Camp

2010-03-25T17:58:00.000-07:00

I totally did not know there was one in the bay area. I've always wanted to go to the Portland one (and possibly meet Carrie Brownstein and other members of some of my favorite PDX bands hehe) but I'm too old to be a participant now... but not to be a volunteer! But anyway, there's one in Oakland!

http://www.bayareagirlsrockcamp.org/
Their mission:

The Bay Area Girls Rock Camp (BAGRC) is a nonprofit organization which aims to empower girls through music education, promoting an environment that fosters self-confidence, creativity and teamwork. The BAGRC strives to challenge gender stereotypes, encourage collaboration and tolerance among peers, and provide a comfortable space for people of all backgrounds to express themselves. Through music lessons, workshops, group activities and performance, girls acquire skills that will help guide them throughout their lives.

I would have LOVED this back in high school... even middle school. I started teaching myself how to play the guitar starting in 7th grade or so. I haven't stopped since. Girls rock camp is for ages up to 18, but there's also a ladies rock camps for those who are older. I think there are scholarships for the girls rock camp, but not for the ladies one... it's $400 to attend. :/ But I really would consider applying to be a volunteer instructor for the Bay Area Girls Rock Camp next year. Ooooh yeah, creating the next generation of riot grrrls, haha. :D

Prom Sucks - Constance McMillen gets $30K a year for her education. Take that, Itawamba County School District!

2010-03-24T13:20:00.000-07:00

Caught this on: http://www.feministing.com/archives/020479.html

If you didn't hear about this story, basically... Mississippi high school student Constance McMillen wanted to bring her girlfriend to prom. She also wanted to wear a tuxedo to it. School said no to both, ACLU said that would be a violation of her rights, and THEN that caused such an uproar that the school canceled the prom altogether. U.S. District Judge Glen H. Davidson ruled that it WAS a violation of her rights, but he wouldn't force the school to hold the prom. So it's still canceled. Oh, Constance also got a $30K check from Tonic.com towards her education, and Ellen Degeneres renewed it for 3 years. Considering the budget cuts and tuition hikes within the UC system right now, I would also really like $30K a year to cover my education.

But yes, PROM. I remember prom. I went my senior year with my girlfriend 3 years ago. It was expensive and boring. Formal dances always bothered me because they're so gendered... I'm expected to dress and act a particular way just because I happen to be female-bodied. So awkward. I mean, I wasn't really hiding the fact that we were dating, but we also never really brought it up. If people had a decent gaydar, they knew. If not, I'm pretty sure they figured it out by the end of the school year.

The first thing we did when we got to the Hyatt (or wherever prom was held) was get our pictures taken. We had been dating for 6 months, so I guess we wanted some nice pictures of us. I wore a sparkly red dress, she wore a really nice off-white dress. I don't know why I even wore a dress. I have probably worn one 2 times since then. Anyway, since we were both girls, the photographer assumed that we were friends and kept telling us to get into these cheesy back to back poses. Anybody who wanted a picture with the opposite sex, they would also assume that they wanted to lock arms or would tell the guy to hold the girl. At that point, we were so awkward and uncomfortable (well, I was anyway) that I didn't really want to tell the photographer in front of everyone that I didn't want the "JUST FRIENDS <3" pose. Oh well.

The rest of the evening was boring. I remember eating a lot of coconut shrimp. Didn't dance because she wasn't really into dancing and I wasn't into dancing to Top 40 hits (which is also why I hate clubbing... I need to find a place that plays some indie/riot grrrl/etc). Ummmmmmmm. Yeah. We + some of our friends went out to Ihop afterwards... And that's how my prom went.

Prom sucks.

Carrie Brownstein and Janet Weiss of Sleater-Kinney in a new band!!?

2010-03-20T16:36:00.000-07:00

http://www.ifc.com/news/2010/03/carrie-brownstein.php

Interview with Carrie Brownstein about her role in film, "Some Days Are Better Than Others"...but also mentions:

"Are you missing playing music?

I am. And I just started a new band after taking many much-needed years off from playing. I can't really talk about it that much, but we have seven songs, and there are four of us, and we're based in Portland -- but not all of our members live there.

Can you give me any clues?

I can tell you that Janet Weiss from Sleater-Kinney is also in it."

ANNND... potentially a new Sleater-Kinney album!

"When am I going to get to hear a new Sleater-Kinney album?

Well, Janet, Corin and I are still great friends. And we will probably do something. It's so intense, that band.

People love that band.

We spent 11 years committed to that band, heart and soul. To get back into it we have to be in that place where we can immerse ourselves fully. I think it will happen. We have to loop around, and we're at the far end of the circle, away from the band, but I think we will come back and revisit it. And hopefully that record will be sometime in the next five years."

Last I heard, Corin Tucker has a new album coming out, too, according to her Facebook. :D

The Bird and the Bee - Fucking Boyfriend

2010-03-18T23:59:00.000-07:00

The Bird and the Bee - Fucking Boyfriend