Turn Signal

Turn Signal

by Jennifer Manlowe

Circles of traffic swirl and spin near the drain.

Bigger cars switch to-and-fro like hungry great whites.

Two cars hold the rest hostage, oppressed by undone chores.

One billboard sounds its trumpet of good will:

WE’RE BACK IN BUSINESS BECAUSE OF YOU!

Caps shout boldly soze not to miss a worthy neighbor.

Possibility’s fingers unfurl one-by-one.

Tired dogs lean wistfully against closed cool windows.

Considering new tricks, they decide “not today.”

Rearview mirrors reveal space between each drop’s moon.

Spare storefronts once held by Mom and Pop give way.

Pottersville’s “Dogtown” brags like a Vegas hotel.

“Dirty Dogs Washed Here; Cats Welcome!” on the left.

“Teacher’s Pet,” “Pampered Paws,” on the right.

“Doggone Daycare’s” the most stubborn, won’t even answer one question.

Espresso booths sag beneath tattered prayer flags, somehow knowing they’re no longer needed.

Half-dressed bookstores lean forward bearing marks of  lost “wildness.”

Tarot readings and Used Books from $1 to $10 dollars wait their turn.

Moody drops flip to sleet spanking windshields without patience.

“What were you thinking?” they scream at no one in particular.

Unsinkable cycles refuse to give in.

Jefferson County’s wettest day gives birth to pink buds.

Huddled together they climb, determined to keep their promise.

~

If you want to break rules as a writer, be sure to schedule a 30-minute complimentary book coaching session via email: authorizeU@gmail.com.

If we begin working together, my eBook — AuthorizeU: Share Your Voice with the World — will be yours as part of the COACHING PACKAGE.  Books that might support you in getting where you want to go are HERE.

If we knew each other’s secrets, what comforts we should find. ~ John Churton Collins

Though we’ve clearly “come a long way, baby,” we have a long way to go if we’re to feel authentic about our well-earned success. In The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women: Why Capable People Suffer from the Impostor Syndrome and How to Thrive in Spite of It, Dr. Valerie Young honors those of us who have oodles of measurable evidence for our accomplishments but little conviction of our competence. Through years of experience and well-honed research, she’s uncovered vital information for women (and the men who can relate to this phenomenon). This work helps those wondering what’s stopping them professionally and shows us exactly the “what” and the “why” of this “syndrome.” Her research and findings give us what we need to know if we’re to make big shifts that make a difference not only for us but our world.

Young finds that far too many of us respond sheepishly when we’ve been rewarded for “a job well done!” Instead of saying “Thank You,” we’re more likely to shoot down the compliment by saying, “It’s just dumb luck.” In my own case, complimenting me for winning an academic award or for any kind of accomplishment, I’ve answered such praise with a nervous grin, “Don’t look to closely; it’s all smoke and mirrors!” I wish I were kidding or at least feigning modesty but my motives were the same as the women Young speaks of here.

By giving the reader myriad examples of people who can’t quite believe they’ve arrived to their position on their own merit, we find comfort and resonance. For example, as a professor of philosophy, I drove to and from work — a 70-mile commute each way — mentally chanting, “I’m such a hack; I won’t be able to hide it much longer!” In that one sentence I enacted the very things Young calls “Impostor Phenomenon.” She describes this peculiar experience as including one or more of these phenomena:

* a deep conviction we are frauds to the core of our being no matter what we’ve achieved

* no sense of genuine accomplishment (regardless of contrary evidence)

* chronic and exhausting self doubt

* the urge to keep our feelings about this to ourselves

* stuck in a puzzling loop of self-sabotage (as we get close to taking on riskier challenges, we bail in order to save face)

* doomed to a life of running like a fugitive certain of our disastrous fate

* using excuses for how we got here: “dumb luck,” “somebody made a careless error in hiring me,” “I have no clue how I got here,” etc.

* in no way might we be perceived as women without confidence or low self-esteem.

In the early 1980s, while in graduate school, Young pursued her doctoral degree with much trepidation and doubt. She had come from a long line of family who’d made their living as housecleaners, homemakers and custodians. Many first generation students pursuing a college degree can feel this ambivalence.

At first she took on academic challenges with excitement and curiosity but as time drew near to start the dissertation, she felt stymied and baffled as to why she couldn’t motivate herself. In search of explanations, she first came up with “I must not have it in me.” She ended up believing her sluggishness toward taking on a thousand pages of research was due to “academic laziness.” After coming across the “Impostor Syndrome” work of sociologists Dr. Pauline Clance and Dr. Suzanne Imes, her life changed forever. She was now fired up to give greater visibility to this issue and took the first step with the title of her dissertation, “A Model of Internal Barriers to Women’s Occupational Achievement.”

Young builds on and updates Clance and Imes’s work to illustrate this unrelenting trend among women who still feel trapped in the struggle to believe their contribution is real. She also refers to the diverse stories told to her over her 30 years of offering leadership training in Fortune 200 companies. Her first workshop entitled, “How to Feel as Bright and Capable as Everyone Seems to Think You Are: Why Smart Women (and Men) Suffer from Impostor Syndrome and What to Do About It” packed the house with a broad swath of self-questioning achievers. From that moment on she continued to gather extensive research and hundreds of testimonials on the topic since 1982.

In the first part of her work, I found myself nodding and shouting “Yes!” with identification. I eventually ran out of ink while underlining her most unique findings. Readers drawn to this title will do the same. As much as I hate to admit this, for most of my life, I’ve experienced my successes as if they were pennies sliding off Teflon; nothing lasted for more than a few seconds. Like the majority of women in this book, I didn’t know I could help others and myself by questioning why we feel this way. In my case, no matter how many competitive awards I’d won by age 30, how many Ivy league degrees accumulated and worked for (4), how many languages passed in graduate school (5), or how many feminist essays read (and even written) by that time, I was convinced that all of my work was due to one fact: “I’m a great bluffer.” I said none of this to put others at ease; I was certain. I thought I was a true fraud. Philosophically I knew such a moniker was oxymoronic but I could not shake these haunting feelings. I’m convinced that others will identify with Young’s findings. Reading this book will give both women and men hope that feelings like these can change in lasting ways. She gives us myriad tools to lessen the power of our false convictions and lets us witness how this change works.

As Harvard Law School’s first female graduate (and co-founder of NOW) Bella Abzug said so clearly, “Our struggle today is not to have a female Einstein get appointed as assistant professor. It is for a woman schlemiel to get as quickly promoted as a male schlemiel.” According to Young’s research, around 70% of us feel like frauds and most “type A” people feel like skillful actors. But, in the case of most women achievers, when they act as if they are qualified, more of them feel like liars putting one over on others.

One would never believe how many of us walk around feeling guilty and doubting that we are just as capable, if not more capable, than any other person in a similar position. Young quotes Oscar winning actor René Zelwegger who says, “Oh, damn! Here we go again! What were they thinking? They gave me this role; don’t they know I’m faking it?” After reading these testimonials, I’m left wondering: “If most of us are ‘acting the part,’ are the other 30% watching the show?”

As an author and professor interested in gender and power, I love to read and even write books that encourage women to uncover the societal “isms,” norms that have them doubting their abilities. I’m often sorely disappointed that the most popular books on women and “success” place responsibility for this squarely on the individual woman’s shoulders without situating the problem within its wider social context — the petri dish where the social-psychological toxins multiply and thrive. This particular work has much more to show us and more secrets than one could ever predict especially for someone whose read everything on the topic.

Chapter-by-chapter, I’ve found compelling stories rendered in thorough and accessible ways. In the second half of the book I came to understand that truly “successful” women define success in surprisingly broad ways, not quite as they did at the beginning of the women’s movement, (equal pay and access to jobs formerly held by men). Their “secrets” are multiple but one of them empowers the rest of us to savor the truth of our unique style, one that often includes championing the success of others.

The best of her work has us seeing the why of our sense of fraudulence within the larger system of American values, gender stereotypes and unconscious beliefs. By the book’s end, we learn to perceive mechanisms at work that help us have compassion for ourselves, workable tools and practical tips that help any reader begin breaking the chains that keep us stuck professionally.

Personal awareness and change take time. There will be moments of profound clarity and abject confusion. There will be victories and set backs. ~ Valerie Young

In no way is this book a “Women are from Mars and Men are from Venus.” No need to make universal claims; there are always exceptions. Yes, one can find men who feel this way too, especially men raised outside the gated walls of the white, hetero-elite. But somehow of all the work on the “why” of the “Imposter Phenomenon,” only 2% of them have been conducted by men. Now either the men being studied are lying in great numbers or male researchers don’t care enough to conduct research in the area. Young guesses that “acting” as if you’re as qualified as they think you are has never stopped most men from taking advantage of most profitable opportunities.

Young respects the diverse motives that women might have for doubting the authenticity of their accomplishments. My favorite section in each chapter gives the reader a chance to reflect on her own relationship to Young’s findings (neatly summarized at the end). Her work has the reader asking herself, “Do I believe I’m unworthy of this CEO position, or that it’s a poor fit for me, or do I simply want a life with greater work-life balance?” The old “Lone Ranger” corporate model for success is untenable for most and chasing the status quo method of success hurts both men and women who want to remain awake to others and present to their lives.

Maybe the cause of 21st-century angst is due to our narrow definition of success, as if it were the only thing that matters.
 Perhaps we are trying to reach a goal that we did not set ourselves — it has been set by society, by the media, by commercialism.

If you still feel baffled by self-imposing glass ceilings, reading  The Secrets Thoughts of Successful Women will help you uncover the roots and not just the weeds (that symptom called “Imposter Syndrome”). She’ll unearth the sources of these recalcitrant feelings of fraudulence. She gives us the framework we need to examine what, why and how we feel such recurring self-doubt in our achievements. By showing us multiple methods that help us crawl out of the ditch of despair, we can begin to bloom wherever we are. One thing’s for sure, if you practice nothing this book suggests, that’s exactly the amount of change you’ll experience.

~

If you want to taste your own form of success, be sure to schedule a 30-minute complimentary book coaching session via email: authorizeU@gmail.com.

If we begin working together, my eBook—AuthorizeU: Share Your Voice with the World—will be yours as part of the COACHING PACKAGE.  Books that might support you in getting where you want to go are HERE.

1. They dare to plumb the depths of memories in ways I cannot predict. Even memoirs authored by quintuplets (within the same family) should feel unique to the reader. No one else can have one person’s impression of “what happened way back when….” Remember Akira Kurosawa’s 1950 movie Roshomon? If not, please see it now. It’s about one heinous crime and its aftermath recalled from five different points of view. Kurosawa’s sister suffered a similar crime and he could not forget it nor can the movie’s viewers.

2. They don’t just inspire me, they incite me to keep reading their memoirs. One thing’s for sure, they have a knack for pushing past the “dear diary” modality of “sharing.” As my favorite 21st-century novelist Margret Atwood writes, “A journal is meant for an audience of one.”

3. When writers resist telling and instead risk revealing events readers are allowed to draw their own conclusions. Well-crafted and courageous disclosure open up a portal into our own reminiscences.

4. She is patient and only gives me one small slice of her life at a time. Her deft use “portioning” makes me hungry and I want to read on. Like any good drama, she stops herself from giving away everything in the first couple of chapters. She knows I want to feel drawn in, walked with for awhile, and taken somewhere unfamiliar.

5. If she’s trustworthy, she’s probably not explaining herself. Just like I behave when attending a big party, if a storyteller works hard to ENLIGHTEN me, I head to another room in the house or leave the event altogether. No reader wants to be told, “I know everything that matters and you’re clueless. Try to keep up!” Preachy-teacherly writing makes me want to skip class or miss temple this week.

6. She culls her memories and chooses the most poignant ones to connect with me in a crafty way. She pierces the bubbles of everything I’ve heard before and is never lazy. No one wants to read hackneyed one-liners strung together by the spiritually well-intentioned. I say, “Save that kind of writing for fortune cookies!”

7. She neither grovels nor aggrandizes her role within her memories. When anyone I’m around is whiny or heroic for more than 10 minutes, I find myself wishing he or she would stop talking. I feel this same way when someone I know won’t stop singing off key. I want to believe they’re joking but I can’t be sure and it never works out well to ask.

8. She recollects not only personal aspects of her life, she connects her story to the context of this memory. My own book, Cracking Up, is written as a letter to my six Catholic nieces and covers just a few highlights from the 1970s. So many moments were unforgettable during this decade. There was no need to teach the reader (see #5) the grand history of the women’s movement; not one life event during this time could be separated from the pursuit of the equal rights amendment. If the same story were set in the 1950s, the context would be equally compelling. Imagine the drama in the TV series Mad Men without its particular moment in time. This ad agency is nothing like the one shown in Bewitched (a series told ahistorically). Mad Men‘s success is wholly dependent on the details of its backdrop—one decade of tectonic shifts from 1959 to 1969.

9. She crafts her story with laser-like clarity and artistic attention. Unforgettable memoir writing is not tied to a “memory lane” download, it’s made up of good storytelling. The best writers choose just the right word, metaphor, image and tone. No matter the setting of the narrative, what’s crucial will include plot, characters, and the memoirist’s point of view. If she’s sloppy, we’ll feel it.

10. If she has a message, we will not feel bludgeoned by it. Take the 1998 novel Poisonwood Bible based on the experiences of author Barbara Kingsolver. Kingsolver grew up in a Baptist missionary family that left Georgia to “do God’s work” in the village of Kilanga in the Belgian Congo. What’s unique about the novelization of her past is how she uses the framework of the times in order to tell her story slant — like all good poetry, according to Emily Dickinson. Kingsolver tells her own story through another family, the Prices. Their story parallels their host country’s tumultuous emergence into the post-colonial era. Kingsolver cleverly narrates this journey through the memories of the five women of the family: Orleanna, the long-suffering wife of missionary Nathan Price, and their four daughters — Rachel, Leah, Adah, and Ruth May.

Some memoirists might find it easier to tell their story through different names and locales, which is fine. But she must let the reader know that her work is one of creative-non-fiction and names and places have been changed to protect those wishing to remain innocent (Tee Hee).

We can’t go wrong if we’re willing to use all the best features of an unforgettable memoir: rigorous commitment to detail, showing versus proselytizing, and thoughtful framing within a compelling cultural and historical context. Each one of these features strengthens the threads of a memorable work of art. People within a memoir are like characters in a novel. Doling out the timeline of our impressions and priorities works and, if done well, will move the plot along in page-turning ways. We can see and hear every event as if it were our truth. If it’s truly unforgettable, we will never see the world in the same way.

What moves you to never forget a memoir? Comment here below to add to this list.

~

Writing from life is not only about the past; it provides creative rewards right now and in the future. Sign up now to receive my help. As your Writing Mentor, I’ll be with you every step of they way. We won’t stop until you fulfill your wish to share your story with the world.

Be sure to schedule a 30-minute complimentary book coaching session via email: authorizeU@gmail.com.

If we begin working together, my eBook — AuthorizeU: Share Your Story with the World — will be yours as part of the COACHING PACKAGE.  Books that might support you in getting where you want to go are HERE.

Find me on Facebook.

Follow me on Twitter.

~

The joy my clients get through coaching supports them

in bringing their stories out and into the world! Don’t wait to begin!

Writing from life is not only about the past; it provides creative rewards right now and in the future. Sign up now to receive my help. As your Writing Mentor I will teach you how to fulfill your wish to share your story with the world.

Be sure to schedule a 30-minute complimentary book coaching session via email: authorizeU@gmail.com.

If we begin working together, my eBook—AuthorizeU: Share Your Voice with the World—will be yours as part of the COACHING PACKAGE.  Books that might support you in getting where you want to go are HERE.

See my facebook page HERE.

Lately I’ve been thinking: “Jeez, Jenn, you’ve taught yourself everything you know about becoming visible online, perhaps some of your own clients might want to learn how to GET OUT THERE with these FREE methods for networking.”

By their request, I’ve begun teaching an eight-week class called Getting Visible Online: Have More Fun Connecting with Your Ideal Buyers. As you can see, I don’t mention those buzz words, “Web Presence” or “Social Media Platform” because they’re just jargon for what we want: to connect with people who want what we offer. Whether you’re an entrepreneur, a new author, or a person using the web to connect socially, I believe I can teach you how to use these online tools. Why?


1 - I live to give others visibility online.


2 - Though I’ve taught myself a lot through playing around online, I’ve also learned a great deal from Founder of Authentic Marketing Molly Gordon. 

3 – I know the online marketing system inside-out and I have worked with many happy clients that are now reaping big benefits from their newfound visible presence. 

4 – I will help you understand the Social Media Universe (Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumbler, LinkedIn, and Instagram), so that you network online with ease and start to enroll new clients. 



5 – I will teach you how to use time-saving tools and simple systems so you’ll feel comfortable growing your audience.

6 – I will help you identify what to delegate to someone else and what to do yourself in order to get the best results without burnout. 

7 – I will help you build a client waiting list so that you can start focusing on the fun part of serving more people in ways that feel lively. 



8 – If you are a visual learner who loves to use images to convey your message, I do my best work with people like you. 

9 – I will help you stay connected with your style so that you will make a noticeable impact on other peoples’ lives in ways that feel like the REAL you. 



10 – I will also help you discover and even play with your strengths - those qualities and values that come naturally to you. You’ll see that your authentic presence online draws to you the people you want to work with most. 

Let me know how I can support you to create online visibility in ways that benefit everyone. Simply send me a  message saying “I’m ready to begin!” You’ll find me at AuthorizeU@gmail.com. I look forward to meeting you and learning about your wishes.

Do you need clarity before you write your memoir? I find the psycho-spiritual instrument called Enneagram a great vehicle to access and express my authentic voice in writing.

Regina Noakes

What is the Enneagram?

The Enneagram draws from several other wisdom traditions and explores nine personality types that combine to give us insight into our communication methods.

As you learn about the nine Enneagram types and witness your personal style in communication — especially as a writer — you’ll gain awareness regarding your own story, how you share it, and with whom.       

Jennifer Manlowe, Your Writing Mentor

Learn more about how I can support you with your writing project. Simply send me a message at AuthorizeU@gmail.com and tell me a little bit about you and your project.

Unlimited Possibilities with Life Design Publishing

With 2013 here, you may be feeling a little overwhelmed trying to decide which goals of yours are worth pursuing for real this time.

I’m personally never without a business coach. I’ve invested lots of dollars in being mentored and have always received a great return on my investment.

I found great value because of these two main things:

1) I knew how to pick the right person based on what I needed at the time

2) I followed through on what I learned and took action!

But how do you decide who is the right coach for you?

Here are the criteria I find worthy of my investment of time and money:

1. They want you to taste the joy of completion

They’re not all about impressing you, they’d rather connect with you and see you meet your dream of becoming a published author. If they’re the real deal, the’ll take joy in your success.

2. They are a published author

They’re a published author and not just a coach helping you become an author. If you want to be published, choose a published one.

3. They “get” your style

If you don’t connect, it’s much too difficult to let the writing process begin. It’s not that they have to be your best friend but they have to understand what makes you tick as a writer, what moves and inspires you, and most important, what you’re trying to convey in your book.

4. Their skills complement yours

If you’re extremely scared of going public with your writing, then find someone who understands how to market your book and share pieces of it all along the way. If you’re a great big picture thinker but have trouble breaking things down into step-by-step plans, then find someone who can help you “chunk it up” (remember the term “baby steps”?).

5. They’re insightful

You want someone who uses their authorial skills as well as their trained listening skills. If they’re really gifted, they’ll use their intuition to grab onto your metaphors and strong threads and hold them up for you to clearly see.

6. They inspire you to act

You want them to see your present talents as well as your potential. If they can see what’s possible, they’ll help you see it too. Eventually you’ll access as your own their deep-seated belief in you and what you can create.

7. They lead by example

If they want you to post chapters of your book and your blog or ezine and they don’t do it themselves, they aren’t leading by example.

8. They help you stay accountable

Of course, it’s completely up to you to do the writing each week (3 – 10 pages), but it’s good to have that little push of a deadline to keep you moving toward the finish line.

9. They’re generous with their resources

You want your coach to let you use template for a publishable book (layout and suggestions). I want my clients to be able to model what I do and adapt it to their own style versus reinventing the wheel.

10. They’ve helped others succeed

Look for a coach who has a track record of success. Look at their testimonial page and make sure there are some good successes to report. Don’t just look at the outcomes but the relationship between the coach and client.

I’ve taken a few from my testimonial page as an example of what to look for…

Colleen Fisher

“Jennifer Manlowe is just the person I needed to boot me into finally making my book a reality! With her wisdom, experience and unrelenting patience my book Fitness Is Forever became my first (but not last) published book! Jennifer was always there to bring me back when I was in a panic about completion, needed help with wording, or just a new idea to think about. I highly recommend her services to anyone thinking they may have a book inside them. Thank you, Jennifer!!!!” ~ Colleen Fisher, author of Fitness is Forever

Stephanie Jackson

“Thank you for this and for all your wisdom regarding completing my eBook in a timely and super satisfying manner. I am excited for our journey together and what we create! Thanks also for the reminder to celebrate the many small accomplishments that happen that I can just sweep under the rug!!! Yeah I deserve a Woot Woot!!!!!!” ~ Stephanie Jackson, author of Igniting Your Healthy Soul

Flora Brown, PhD

“Jennifer is insightful, detail-oriented and creative. She played an integral role in helping me get my first self-help book written and published. Her extensive experience in publishing gives her depth and expertise that are rare.” ~  Flora Brown, PhD, author of Color Your Life Happy

Valerie Young, PhD

“The passion with which Jennifer approaches each book coaching and publishing client is itself worth its weight in gold. But it’s her keen skills at helping aspiring writers attain their goals that set her apart. Quite simply, Jennifer is a gem.” ~  Valerie Young, Founder and Dreamer in Residence, Changing Course, author of Impostor Syndrome

Kate Phillips

“I have known Jennifer for years and have attended events where she has spoken. Jennifer is a wealth of information, not only about book writing and publishing (she has written and published many books herself), but she is particularly gifted with mentoring people who are in the process of birthing their books. As an author, a writer, and a certified coach, Jennifer has much to offer!” ~ Kate Philips, Total Wealth Coaching

 

11. What is their writing philosophy?

The coach needs to create an environment that both nurtures and pushes you to write. If they only offer praise, that’s coddling you, as if you needed them to be the “angelic mother” you never had. A smart writing coach will help you find your voice with open and honest questions—the ones she doesn’t know the answer to.  She’ll draw out that story in you in ways that respect it is really your baby in end.

I have a very particular workshop method I use (adapted from when I taught dance to 6 year olds) that allows writers to open doors into the mind of their inner writer. Sometimes these doors have been closed by strict family rules and oppressive social/gender norms. I suppose the whole philosophy would be “Let’s uncover that truth telling voice of yours and share it with the world!” and “We can do this together, I promise!”

Above all, remember this. No one knows you as well as you do. Take what you learn from your coach but don’t forget: in the end, you’re the one authoring your manuscript. Always trust your instincts in making the right decisions for you. A great coach will not be defensive or hurt by your empowered moves, but will encourage you to make them.

~

Jennifer Manlowe, Your Writing Mentor

If you would like to learn more about how I can support you with your writing, just send me — Jennifer Manlowe, Your Writing Mentor and Book Publishing Coach — a message at AuthorizeU@gmail.com 

Let’s arrange a time to connect so I can learn more about you and explore how we might work together to see your story come into print (and as an eBook). In addition to one-on-one coaching, there are lots of other ways I can help you via my training as a Life Clarity Coach.

Most writers’ lives are filled with texture born of loss, bliss, misunderstanding, gladness, broken hearts and moments of renewal. Even if an author has had to raise three disabled kids on her own after the death of her abusive husband, I find the writing process to be a creative one.

A good memoir is about what the writer makes of her experience and about shaping that experience into an engaging story. I see the authors I work with more as artists than as victims of their lives.

Even the movie The Perks of Being a Wallflower was based on a young boy suffering with confusion and working with unimaginable betrayals. Still, the writer told this life story in ways that remained enlivening. He had no need to wrap up the musty mess with an easy bow.

If Wallflower was a typical “coming of age” story told to show the reader that awkward kids eventually come to accept and be part of the norm, we’d be disappointed: one, because such a tale does not ring true to any one of us (awkward or not); two, there are indeed perks to being unique and Chbosky did not fail to show us the full range of feelings that go along with “not fitting in” to the mainstream.

At its best, memoir is heartfelt, resonant with its reader and unrepeatable. It’s the reason why The Diary of Anne Frank is the most popular book about the Holocaust. Her writing doesn’t just reveal what it was like to live in moment-to-moment fear of genocidal murder, it explores answers to the question of how the narrator survived.

Sure, I’ve heard some heavy stories: a woman adopted by a schizophrenic mother and was never told the truth until her death, teenage sisters coming into their summer cabin only to discover their brother had hung himself a few days before, others about how two men deal with post-WWII trauma, one becomes a tea party Republican, the other becomes a vocal anti-war activist. Life is indeed stranger than fiction and to me, more fascinating.

Not all of my writers tell a tragic story in ways that remain tragic. Even acceptance of various truths of their lives can be liberating. Therein lies the privilege and also the challenge of teaching how to write memoir. It’s a privilege because it is a joy to witness a writer’s reminiscences “come to life” in and through writing; and it’s a challenge because creating a story out of life’s messy details takes patience and skill. As V.S. Pritchett famously said about writing memoir: “It’s all in the art. You get no credit for living.”

“All unhappy families are unhappy in unique ways.” ~ Leo Tolstoy

In some of my Enneagram for Memoirists class, students come with a big project in mind. The most grandiose students rarely write more than a few pages. The ones who complete the class and write the beginnings of their manuscript do so because they’ve heeded my hard won advice: “All good art takes time and needs to be executed with small deliberate actions. Even ants know this.” Students who go small often complete their big project. One well-crafted scene can show more of the mosaic of life than 105 pages of genealogical exposition.

For example: One of my students experienced a few nights in a haunted house. Even her doctor friend claimed to have witnessed her own bedroom furniture move around, appearing to be aided by invisible hands. While my student knew that her story was compelling on the face of it, she didn’t know what to leave in, what to leave out or how she’d make a full-length memoir out of three terrifying nights in a strange house.

Then, after much practice in writing scenes, she turned in 10 pages a week for 16 weeks. By going slowly and attending to visual details and authentic dialogue, her writing seemed to fly out of her. Her scenes build up tension and flow from moment to moment and room to room. In telescoping this frightening event, she managed to show everything: the mysterious situation, the intimacy with her friend, the stories of hauntings from her grandmother, the mundane and the extraordinary. As I read those pages, I knew she had turned a corner as a writer. And as her writing coach, there is no greater joy — really, no greater privilege — than helping a writer find her voice and share it with the world.

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Jennifer Manlowe, PhD, CPC is an author, educator, speaker and Certified Publishing Coach with over 20 years of experience helping people find and express their voice in writing. Jennifer loves hearing from readers and writers and is eager to support them as they launch their creative work in the world through writing and online publishing!

Be sure to schedule a 30-minute complimentary phone consultation to see how this kind of coaching works. Make an appointment via telephone: (206) 617-8832 or email: AuthorizeU@gmail.com

National Novel Writer’s Month

National Novel Writing Month is a fun, seat-of-your-pants approach to novel writing. Participants begin writing on November 1. The goal is to write a 50,000-word (approximately 175-page) novel by 11:59:59 PM on November 30.

Valuing enthusiasm and perseverance over painstaking craft, NaNoWriMo is a novel-writing program for everyone who has thought fleetingly about writing a novel but has been scared away by the time and effort involved.

As you spend November writing, you can draw comfort from the fact that, all around the world, other National Novel Writing Month participants are going through the same joys and sorrows of producing the Great Frantic Novel. Wrimos meet throughout the month to offer encouragement, commiseration, and—when the thing is done—the kind of raucous celebrations that tend to frighten animals and small children.

In 2011, we had 256,618 participants and 36,843 of them crossed the 50K finish line by the midnight deadline, entering into the annals of NaNoWriMo superstardom forever. They started the month as auto mechanics, out-of-work actors, and middle school English teachers. They walked away novelists.

Want to know more about NaNoWriMo? Read on!

How NaNoWriMo Works

Facts and Stats

History

NaNoWriMo in the News

Media Kit

Testimonials

Help Wanted

Published NaNoWriMo Novelists

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Be sure to schedule a 30-minute complimentary book coaching session with me (Jennifer Manlowe) via email: jlmanlowe@comcast.net.  If we begin working together, my eBook—AuthorizeU: Share Your Voice with the World—will be yours as part of the COACHING PACKAGE. Books that might support you in getting where you want to go are HERE.

Radio Interview with Jennifer Manlowe

Listen and learn through this radio interview with Bob Ogilvy and Jennifer Manlowe (me) conducted by Valerie Young author and “dreamer in residence” with Changing Course.

Find your voice and share it with the world in the form of online publishing. Why and How? Find out all about it HERE.