Jhny-Drko

formspring.me

2011-08-14T15:47:00.001-07:00

I'm entertaining all questions from bland to bizarre. http://formspring.me/JHNYDRKO

formspring.me

2011-06-23T02:30:00.001-07:00

I'm entertaining all questions from bland to bizarre. http://formspring.me/JHNYDRKO

Testing 1,2,3...

2010-11-20T00:01:00.000-08:00

It's been a while, and I have to test out a new Blogger front-end for Linux. If you can read this message, then it worked afterall. **CROSSES FINGERS**

NSFW, Smack My Bitch Up!

2010-03-20T22:30:00.000-07:00

The Prodigy - Smack My Bitch Up brought to you by NSFW///Johnny Darko

Just a shot for my GetGlue.com Guru page

2010-02-05T16:19:00.000-08:00

My Birthday Anthem!

2010-01-27T05:38:00.000-08:00

Rockstar Birthday Wishes

2010-01-27T05:29:00.000-08:00

I'm not really a fan of Clear Channel radio stations, but this was a cool e-mail to receive.

A song that goes through my head every time I am going to sleep away from my babycakes...

2010-01-16T07:24:00.000-08:00

I love you dearly and sweetly my dear Gingerbooty.

I Love You Kater-tot,

-J.

I'm tellin' you. 2012's election will be Zombie Reagan and Lil' Wayne. Check it out!

2010-01-16T06:58:00.000-08:00

Zombie Reagan Raised From Grave To Lead GOP

Seriously! Who can outdo Zombie Reagan?

www.RonJigga.com

2010-01-16T06:43:00.000-08:00

Seriously guys, I want to see more than just this! WE WANT CONTENT! WE WANT CONTENT! WE WANT CONTENT!!!

Wow, Jenni does get it all. But why?!?

2010-01-16T06:10:00.000-08:00

This I actually expect, Joe Francis trying to capitalize off of another trendy, in-the-news woman with nothing better to do. I can't believe that jerk still has money to blow.

This just annoys me. You get a little fame, and then you can be the talentless cliché that can rub shoulders with Oscar-nominated caliber actors like Leo DiCaprio. MTv really can change lives.

Anyways, I'm only complaining. I gotta run. Jersey Shore is coming on!

CHUY AND SNOOKIE?

2010-01-15T20:56:00.000-08:00

HAHAHA!!! Who's lives are exploited worse on television? And neither one of them do much for Italian or Mexican racial pride. What a joke this pair makes!

Cooliris for Chrome Beta!

2010-01-14T18:29:00.000-08:00

Get Chrome Beta here, then download the Cooliris Extension--Extensions work a lot like Firefox Add-ons. As far as Cooliris goes, it's much like the album art viewer in iTunes, but you can catalog all kinds of pictures: online galleries, files on your computer, and even websites. Wanna see all the ads side-by-side in Craigslist with the corresponding item pictures? Wanna see cds shown by album art in Amazon.com or a 3D view of a friends Facebook pictures from an event, use this extension, it's really helpful. All you do is visit all your web pages just like you always have, but when you scroll over a picture a little icon shows up in the bottomw left corner. Click it, and you get images like the one above! It's so Cooliris!

Natalie is MINE!

2009-12-16T19:56:00.000-08:00

I've always known I was the Natalie Portman Guru.

Video Chat w/ David Duchovny

2009-12-15T21:32:00.001-08:00

Love Californication? Check out this Q&A session w/ David Duchovny as he fills us in on all things Season 3, and the upcoming Season 4.

Obama releases new government pills, guaranteed to make everyone FEEL GOOD!

2009-12-09T12:10:00.000-08:00

Check out this http://bit.ly/6itSAH!!! It's the newest addiction to pharmaceutical drugs in the new Obama Universal Health Plan! That's right, now the same ecstasy available to the president, and all members of Congress, is available to you!!! It comes straight from your tax money!

The Bahermin Strikes Again!

2009-12-04T10:10:00.000-08:00

So I had a pretty random conversation with Bahermin today, and this is how it went--I honestly hope someone was fucking with me and logged into his account for a bit of fun. CreeEeeEEeEeeepy!

Traci Lords is following me?

2009-12-03T18:35:00.000-08:00

I don't have too many followers on Twitter, but I do have the real deal Traci Lords! You can follow me too, just go to www.twitter.com/jhny_drko. Thanks!!!

Two Tickets (a play writing exercise for English 205, Creative Writing)

2009-11-20T08:49:00.001-08:00

ACTORS:

Alee –cute girl, very proper. Also, she's in to music. (Narayah Lowechin)

Chester –a lazy slacker, serial pickup artist from the block (Johnathan K. Johnson)

Marlene –from El Salvador, a former model/gangster rap video girl (Camille Woodward-Brown)

Bee –a wise old woman, aka "Nasty Bitty" (Aida Prieto)

SETTING:

A quiet bus stop in the afternoon.

Act 1

Alee: (waiting at the bus stop alone)

Chester: (walking up) Hey there sweet heart.

Alee: (smiling) Hi how are you?

Chester: You know I don't see too many beautiful ladies at this bus stop. Usually, it's just nasty old bitties.

Alee: (laughing) Oh wow! That's funny, but we all get older one day.

Chester: Don't remind me of all that. Let me just enjoy you right now, okay? So what is your name?

Alee: It's Alee.

Chester: Hi, my name is Chester. (grinning) So what are you doing in this area?

Alee: Well I'm on my way to the radio station to pick up my free tickets for the Aerosmith concert.

Chester: You won them? Wow that's awesome! I love their music!!

Alee: Have you seen them before live? This is my third time seeing Aerosmith. They're great performers and I have loved their music since I was a child.

Chester: So are you taking anyone?

Alee: Well I've never gone to a concert alone, but the person I wanted to take can't make it.

Chester: Aw that's no fun! You should have someone who can enjoy it with you. (making motions to himself)

Alee: Well I know I just met you, but since I don't have anyone to take to this show. You wanna go tomorrow night?

Chester: Damn! Absolutely! Those are probably the hardest tickets to get right now, and you want to take me?

Alee: Well, I certainly wouldn't be wasting them if I was sharing them with a guy like you.

Chester: Alright! Okay! How hard was it to get those tickets? You must really be a fan to call that many times to win the tickets.

Alee: You're right. I was calling almost all day yesterday, and I am a HUGE fan. Before my momma died, she used to play their records all the time. She has loved them since she's been my age. She told me how my grandpa used to yell at her all the time for playing their music. He used to gripe about anything my mother listened to; he said it wasn't becoming for a young woman to listen to rock n' roll. But then grandpa came around. Soon grandpa and ma were listenin' to 'em together. Right before I was born, my grandpa went with my mom to her first Aerosmith concert. All the other girls were going with dates, but it was mom and gramps headin' to the concerts together. You ever gone to a show with your mom or dad?

Chester: (fading attention) uhm… oh, nope. (watching someone come in from off stage, Marlene starting to approach from off-stage.)

Alee: (ignoring his distraction and continuing on) Well, that's why I wanted to get these tickets in the first place. I wanted to bring Gramps to another show. But he's not as active as he was back then. He doesn't think he'd be able to handle the rough crowds for an entire concert, and he told me not to waste good tickets on old bones like him. I think he's sweet for saying I should get a date instead, but something tells me he's missing my mom a little, too. Ya know?

Chester: yeah… uh-huh.

Act 2

[Another girl walks in, and Chester loses interest in Alee and directs all his attention to Marlene.]

Chester: (slyly to girl #2, Marlene) Hey there… uhm, you know what time the next bus gets here?

Marlene: (with a flirty smile back) It'll be in like ten. You headed downtown, too?

Alee: (words interrupting the other conversation she doesn't know is taking place) So that'll be great, we'll meet there a little before the show. You know the place I'm talking about?

Chester: (ignoring Alee) I'm going where you're going girl.

Marlene: (giggling) You're corny, but you're really cute, too.

Alee: (a little irritated) uhm, excuse me. Over here!

Chester: (to Alee) Uh oh, my bad. Right, hold on one second. (to Marlene) Sorry, this is my friend Alee, and I'm Chester. (to Alee) look, here's my number, call me before the show. (to Marlene) you think I can get your number sweetheart?

Marlene (enjoying pissing off another girl), yeah, here you go. My name is Marlene, and my number is… (whispers numbers to him, he writes it down on paper.)

Alee: (stands looking pissed off holding Chester's number.)

Chester: What time did you say it was again?

Alee and Marlene: (in unison, and Alee is obviously pissed at Marlene) Ten minutes.

Chester: (looking nervous) Oh SNAP! Look Marlene, I gotta go. But Imma give you a call, K. (to Alee uncaringly) Cya.

[CHESTER EXITS. JUST AFTER, BEE ENTERS. ALEE AND MARLENE STAND THERE LOOKING TICKED OFF WITH EACH OTHER.]

Act 3

Marlene: What is that look for?

Alee: I don't know you standing there acting special. He was talking to me first, after all.

Marlene: I never said I was special, even though it is true. I mean, the number is right here (waving the slip of paper).

Alee: I got his number too! But HE is coming to the concert with ME. He just calling you cuz you look like a hussie.

Marlene: A hussie? Really? I know how to put myself together. But if you were to learn how to put yo'self together, you wouldn't need some lousy concert tickets to get a date.

Alee: First of, you call that look 'put together'? You in here thinkin' you're a supermodel, but you look like a groupie.

Bee: (starting to giggle in the background)

Marlene: Why you stupid tramp! Look at you!? You don't have the body to wear what you be wearing. But you go ahead and tell yourself whatever you have to. I would if I was ugly.

Bee: (laughing hysterically)

Alee & Marlene: (in unison) WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM OLD LADY?!?

Bee: My problem? Young women are all the same, and they're always falling for the same tricks. Uh-huh, that's right…

[Alee & Marlene looking confused.]

Bee: (cont.) …Every day I see that clown 'round here, trying to pick up women like it's his full-time job. Who hangs out at the bus stop all day, and never goes anywhere?

[Alee and Marlene starting to look like they've been duped.]

Bee: I betcha he left once he realized that I was coming, cuz I'm always ready to out him. Unfortunately for you two, it seems he got to work early today.

Marlene: Why that ignorant ass.

Alee: Haha, you been played.

Marlene: Are you that stupid, he played you too.

Alee: I guess you right, but what are you gonna do with that number?

Marlene: you still want him? I'm throwing this number out.

Alee: You trying to push that joke on me!?! I'm not that stupid.

Bee: Hell, almost every asinine, little girl who's ever stood at this stop has that clown's number. That's the problem with you girls nowadays. You don't see the difference between a sincere man, and a little boy who's trying to jump in your pants with silly lines. I can't believe women these days! They're more concerned with getting attention or looking good than using their heads.

[moment of silence between the two young women while they take in Bee's knowledge.]

Alee: what am I gonna do with this spare ticket now?

Marlene: is the concert any good?

Alee: it's Aerosmith you hussie! (giggling)

Marlene: (looking shocked) really?

Alee: yeah. You wanna go?

Marlene: yeah, let's do it. But let's keep the stupid clowns off each other too. Okay?!?

Alee: Okay.

[Bus arrives. All three women board.]

THE END.

They haten on me, all them (F'ED UP VIDEO!)

2009-11-11T09:04:00.000-08:00

They haten on me, all them

Wow, do I really ride public transportation everyday? This shit is CRAZY!

Hey, not everyone has it in them to be a stripper!

2009-11-08T13:15:00.000-08:00

9/11?? It was the Phanatic!

2009-10-28T18:32:00.000-07:00

OMG! This is just horrible, but funny as shit.

Philadelphia Frillies?!?

2009-10-28T18:25:00.000-07:00

I hate the Yankees, but this picture is pretty funny. :P

Philadelphia Phans Survey! (please fill me out @ www.JHNY-DRKO.com)

2009-10-26T08:42:00.001-07:00

Philadelphia Phillies - 2009 World Series Survey (Creative Non-Fiction Piece)

Are you a Philadelphia Phillies Phan, and do you live in Philadelphia?
Do you consider yourself a die-hard fan?
Describe your commitment to the Philadelphia Phillies:
Tell me about your favorite game this season:
What player do you think embodies the spirit of the Philadelphia Phillies image best?
1. Do you think this season is blessed by Harry Kalas?
Did you celebrate at all when the Phillies won the Pennant?
Did you think we would make it this far all along?
1. What made you speculate we wouldn't?
2. What had you convinced we would?
How many games have you been to this season?
Did you attend any post-season games?
Are you planning to attend any World Series games?
Does attending a sports bar, in lieu of getting to Citizen's Bank Park, count as attending the game?
1. Which ones do you go to (besides here)?
2. Which ones do you try to stay away from?
3. What's your best Phillies experience in a sports bar?
What does the World Series win in 2008, and the possible chance to repeat in 2009, mean to you??
Did you attend the celebration Parade last year?
1. How would you describe your experience?
2. What was the most incredible thing you saw at the parade?
Were you in the crowd at City Hall when the team won the World Series last year?
1. How would you describe your experience?
In what ways have the Phillies proven their devotion to their fans? (Give any examples on how you know the Phillies do something extraordinary for their fan base)
In what ways do the Philadelphia Phillies help out their city?
1. How have you seen the Phillies help out in the economy?
2. How have you seen the Phillies help out in the community?
Do you have any thought on the fly-by, fair-weather fan that seems to materialize only in the playoffs or World Series? Are they real fans?
Aside from what makes its way to television, have you personally seen an act of violence happen due to Phillies fans, and tell me what you think about these kinds of fans?
What do you believe defines the "True Phillies Phan"? What are the strange ways you have seen the Phillies fan pay homage to their team?
How would you describe the perfect ending to Philadelphia's current baseball season?
1. Will you attend this year's parade?
2. What will happen if we lose?
Imagine you can say something directly to the Philadelphia Phillies or a single player. What would you say? What would you thank them for?

Send me the check!!! Matt Damon Freaks out!

2009-10-05T13:56:00.001-07:00

You have to watch this video!!!