Joe and Chris O's Movie Reviews

Carnage

2012-01-16T16:51:00.000-05:00

Carnage was directed by Roman Polanski. Yes, the cowardly rapist who fled the United States in 1977, and whose best interest it is to not come back. With that being said, it does not take away from the fact that he is an incredibly talented filmmaker. Alright, it takes away a little, but I'm trying to separate the man from his work. Carnage is based off of a play, which I have not seen, and contains only four primary characters. They are portrayed by Christoph Waltz, Kate Winslet, Jodie Foster, and John C. Reilly.

The film's plot is incredibly simple and concise, having a run time of less than 80 minutes. Also, the entire film takes place in a single apartment, except for about a minute at the beginning and end where there is shot of a park in Brooklyn, New York. Alan and Nancy Cowan's (Waltz and Winslet) son hit's Michael and Penelope Longstreet's (Reilly and Foster) son with a stick, causing the loss of a couple teeth and some nerve damage. The two couple come together to have a civilized, mature discussion about what happened with the two sons, one of which in a way verbally initiated the fight. The meeting eventually goes horribly wrong and turns into a heated argument between the four people, where parenting styles, marriage quality, and general outlook on life is all put into question.

All four of these people are incredibly talented. I am not a huge fan of any one of them, but I cannot deny that they are gifted at their line of work and they all meshed perfectly together. The success of this film rested primarily on the four actors chosen to dominant the duration of the movie. Each is also incredibly funny. This can be seen with Winlet's character vomiting on the Longstreet's coffee table and later getting drunk on scotch and just letting her mouth run wild. Foster's character is also hilarious as she gets more and more emotional and is practically balling her eyes out by the end of the film. Waltz has a complete disinterest in the whole situation it seems and is glued to his Blackberry, but to the dismay of his wife and the Longstreet's. Having only seen him in Inglourious Basterds I didn't realize how hilarious he was and what great comic timing he has. Finally, Reilly starts out as sort of a weak character, but eventually becomes verbal, opinionated, and unbelievably amusing. I realize I mostly wrecked the movie for you, but I feel like this isn't a mainstream type of movie anyway, so most people may not even find it enjoyable.

Also, if you are expecting a real ending, then by all means see a different movie. Much is discussed, but nothing is settled, and I was perfectly fine with that. After all this movie was a coproduction of about 82 European countries, and they frown upon nicely resolved endings.

I didn't burst out laughing during the the film, like the woman in front of my did practically the whole time. I smiled often, since the dialogue was so funny, not in an obvious or obnoxious way. Also, if you like some or all of the actors, then you will be entertained by their effortlessly interaction and chemistry.

3 out of 4 stars

-Joseph Sbrilli

The Adventures of Tintin

2012-01-16T13:40:00.000-05:00

The Adventures of Tintin is director Steven Spielberg's first animated film. The voice cast includes, Jamie Bell, Andy Serkis, Daniel Craig, Nick Frost, and Simon Pegg.

Tintin (Bell) is a reporter who purchases a model of the ship, the Unicorn. The ship's mast contains one of three pieces of paper, that when put together lead to treasure. Naturally Tintin does not realize this, but Rackham (Craig) does and wants to get the model ship away from Tintin, so he kidnaps him like any normal person would do. The captain, a drunkard named Haddock (Serkis) knows all the information about the treasure because one of his distant relatives owned the ship that contained it. Haddock just needs to sober up, get really dehydrated in the desert, etc. before he can actually be of any use to Tintin. This eventually leads to an action packed trip to Morocco, where the third piece of of the paper puzzle.

This film was animated using motion capture technology. Basically actors where bodysuits and sensors and a computer picks up the movements. The computer fills in the rest. As many people may know this type of animation used to learning extremely creepy and unrealistic. In people's defense animating people is difficult, but I feel like The Polar Express and similar movies to that to a new level. With Tintin many of the actors actually look realistic, which is a major improvement. Also, the settings, including the desert, the sea, a stormy sky, and the city of Morocco, all look absolutely beautiful, sometimes as if actual scenes were filmed.

A review of a Spielberg movie would not be complete without at least a mention of John Williams' score. This man is proves his brilliance in just about every piece of music he ever composes. Many of his scores are extraordinarily well known, even without the film scene's accompanying them. This includes the likes of Jaws and the Star Wars and Indiana Jones series. With that being said the score in Tintin does not disappoint. The orchestra is constantly adding to the action and adventure that is being depicted on the screen. Without Williams' score Tintin most likely would have simply been not as much fun. He seems to know exactly what a Spielberg movie needs in that department.

I've mentioned the action, at times reminiscent of Indiana Jones (I actually read about this comparison on Rotten Tomatoes before I saw the movie myself. I wish I could have made the connection on my own, but upon watching the movie, it is absolutely true). There is also lot's a comic relief to be had. This includes Haddock's drunken antics as well as a pair of inept policemen (Pegg and Frost) who are trying to catch a pickpocket, who I failed to mentioned in the above synopsis. All in all it is just fun for the whole family. Although there is a lot of alcohol references and gunfire/violence for a family animated film.

Tintin is based off a bunch of comic books that I have never read or even heard of before this movie. Therefore, I cannot comment on how well it follows the source the material.

I enjoyed this film immensely. Is was action packed, funny, had a great score, and was just an amusing couple hours in the theater. Judging from the ending there will be tons of sequels, or at least that is what Steven Spielberg and producer Peter Jackson are obviously hoping for. Honestly, I'm just glad this family movie did not get be furiously angry at how ridiculous and unnecessary it was, like I would have reacted to Alvin and the Chipmunks or any of it's numerous sequels.

3 out 4 stars

-Joseph Sbrilli

War Horse

2012-01-07T19:51:00.001-05:00

Let's start this off by saying that Steven Spielberg is the man and I have immense respect for him. He may have basically killed Indiana Jones but Spielberg essentially created the summer blockbuster. While some may look at Transformers 3 and say that this is a very bad thing, I will counter with Jurassic Park and other such films that can just be classified as fun. But Spielberg isn't always satisfied with fun and has given us amazing Oscar worthy films including my all-time favorite movie/war movie/ film of any genre Saving Private Ryan. Long has World War 1 fallen by the way side in movie making with nary a film dedicated to telling the horrifying story in which around 10 million people died in combat. A war where 60,000 men died in one day. I forgive Spielberg for using a boy and his horse as a medium for telling the tale but I can't excuse the awful romantic mishmash that somehow made its way to the screen. After a brief synopsis I will be entering full on rant mode about War Horse.

Albert Narracott (Jeremy Irvine) is a poor English boy struggling with his family to make a living on their rented farm. Unfortunately his dad is an idiot and spends 30 pounds on a horse that's more for show than for farming. Albert falls in love with the horse, and I mean really in love with the horse. I was honestly scared that he was going to start kissing the horse passionately. Anyways he names the horse Joey, Lord knows why, and helps train him. There's a whole long scene where Albert uses Joey to plow an incredibly rocky field so his dad can plant turnips and pay off the rent.

This was about an hour long, or it felt like it. When's the good stuff coming? Finally war breaks out. Did I really just say that? Yes, World War 1 breaks out right when the farm is hit with a huge rain storm that completely ruining Albert's turnip crop. So his dad takes the horse into town and sells it to a British captain in the cavalry. From there the horse changes hands to the German army, somehow ends up in the hands of a German girl and her grandfather, gets taken back by the German army, then ends up in the British army where Albert, who was drafted or so we assume, eventually is reunited with Joey. It is way more complicated than that and so begins my rant. Spoilers ahead.

-Firstly, the title of this movie should be "gay for horses." Albert stares at Joey like Bill Clinton did at the interns. He was there when Joey was born, like a sick peeping tom. His dad happens to buy the horse for 30 pounds like an idiot because he could have gotten a freaking Clydesdale for less. Albert falls madly in love with the horse and since there is no other love interest in the film I feel sincerely bad for the horse.

-We are treated to 18 instances of Albert yelling out "Walk on Joey!" This would be a good time to point out that Jeremy Irvine is a terrible actor and every line made me hate him more.

-They finally get the field planted and the rainstorm ruins it all. But later, somehow they still have their farm and have a full crop of turnips. I didn't see any other horses, how did they replow that field?

-Somehow, Joey is sold to a British captain who loves horses just as much as Albert. So much so that he draws a freaking picture of the horse to send to Albert to show him that Joey is still doing okay. Luckily, the captain quickly finds out that cavalry charge vs. implanted machine gun nests = death. Joey is then taken by two German soldiers.

-Who promptly go AWOL even though one of them was extremely proud to be fighting in the war. Like all incredibly stupid individuals they get caught and shot by even stupider people who didn't even look for the horses the soldiers quite obviously stole.

-This would be a good time to point out that none of the Germans speak German. Ever. Even when their are no English speaking ears about, all German orders are delivered in English. I didn't hear one foreign language in a war purposefully titled a world war. That rankled me especially since...

-Joey was discovered by a German girl and her grandfather, who again refuse to speak their native tongue and wish to only chat in English with a German accent. At this point I started to nod off, it was like the farm scenes because nothing was happening. Finally the Germans, being bastards that they are, take everything from the Grandfather including the horses. Because only Germans are bad people.

-And only Germans use their horses like slaves. Every horse employed by Germany is overworked until it dies whereupon it is placed in a mass horsey grave. Really? Only Germans exploit their horses? The British and French probably NEVER did that right? Only the big bad mean Germans. One, if you overwork all your horses to death, there's no more horses to pull artillery and two, if the horses die why did you just pile them up? That's free food right there, especially if you're already raiding the country side, no wonder the Germans lost.

-Right about here, Joey watches his best horse friend die. Already grief stricken (or whatever horses do) Joey is promptly chased by a tank for absolutely no reason. The tank walls him into a corner. Why is the tank chasing a horse? There's like 20,000 Germans over the ridge and it took the time to wall in a horse. At this point Joey is pretty pissed with everything and runs around the battlefield like there's nothing left to lose. Almost what I did straight out of the theater. He runs right into no mans land and gets quickly tangled up in some barbed wire.

-Meanwhile, four years has passed, and Albert has joined the war. Despite probably being mentally challenged, he is sent to the front line with his best non horse friend who quite obviously is mentally challenged. They both charge a German trench and are promptly gassed. Albert only goes blind while his friend dies. They both are exposed to the same gas but only one dies.

-Joey gets cut out by a German and an Englishman showing a rare bit of civility for the poor horse. Unfortunately Spielberg decided to say the name of the movie here, a tactic which I hate with a loathing. I'll try to quote it word for word.
"This guy (Joey) has been through a lot."
"He's a horse of war."
At this point my head was in my hands, praying to God that he wouldn't say it.
"A war horse." Both the German and the Englishman look at Joey respectfully. I wanted to vomit. Of course with his accent it sounded more like "Woh Hohse."

-Somehow, despite being GASSED BY THE SAME GAS THAT KILLS HIS BEST FRIEND, Albert not only lives but REGAINS HIS SIGHT. But there's a twist, he has to buy Joey back because he's not an officer or some strange rule like that. Sadly a butcher outbid him. Oh well. No wait! The old German man somehow crossed into France at the war's end to buy the horse that his granddaughter loved so much. For some reason he bid 100 pounds on the horse even though the highest bid at that point was only 30. What an idiot. In a startling display of kindness and lunacy the old man decides to just give the horse to Albert for free. What. an. idiot.

-Albert goes home and he and his family celebrate by staring at each other while the sun sets. The end.

People clapped at the end of the film. I wanted to slap them all. War Horse was so disappointing on so many levels. But I have to say that the horse was the best actor in the entire movie. Sadly, he was surrounded by fools and a level of cheese unheard of. I'm sure the play had a great deal of influence in the film as it rightly should but a movie has to be handled differently than a play and I think that's what happened here. The Great War deserves a better film then this. One showing the true horror of war, not just brief glimpses of it. If Saving Private Ryan took the romance out of war (and rightly so) War Horse put it right back in. But don't blame the horse.

1 out of 4 stars. Mostly for the horses fine acting (I'm serious)

-Christopher O'Connell

Tucker and Dale VS. Evil: A Quick Review

2012-01-06T23:07:00.001-05:00

One of the greatest movies I will ever have the privilege of seeing was a horror comedy (Shaun of the Dead). There's something about laughing in the face of terror that ups the comedy factor. Sadly, most recent horror comedy spoofs start with the word Scary and end with the word Movie followed by some ridiculous number. You have to be careful with these types of films, because they may look funny but then all the funny parts just end up in the trailer. Tucker and Dale intrigued me because 1. it had Alan Tudyk who is a favorite of mine and 2. the trailer did make the movie seem genuinely funny. I still didn't expect too much and I certainly wasn't disappointed.

Tucker (Alan Tudyk) and Dale (Tyler Labine) are two hillbilly best friends. They recently purchased an old fixer-er-up cabin in the woods as a vacation home (that was previously owned by a serial killer). A group of sexy, young college kids head up to the same area to camp and whatever else sexy young college kids do in the woods. (Get crunk, make babies etc.) They have a few run-ins with Tucker and Dale before arriving at the campsite and peg the two as creepy backwoods people when in reality they are just nice guys from a different part of the country. Well one night, when Tucker and Dale are fishing, the kids decide to go skinny dipping in the lake. Allison (Katrina Bowden of 30 Rock) accidentally falls off a rock and hits her head a little ways from the group. Tucker and Dale rescue her from the water but to the college kids it looks like they've kidnapped her. The kids vow to get her back and after unfortunate misunderstandings and misreading situations they end up accidentally killing themselves all over the woods, much to the dismay of Tucker and Dale.

First of all, however unlikely it is that these kids would actually accidentally kill themselves is besides the point, because it is freaking hilarious. Now, usually I am not a gore fan. But in a comedic setting (Tropic Thunder, Shaun of the Dead) I find it absolutely hilarious. When a kid mistakenly jumped into a woodchipper and it looked like Tucker was shoving him in there, I was rolling in my seat. It was great. Blood went everywhere. Add to that a nice little twist in the end so all the kids getting killed off isn't entirely pointless.

Tucker and Dale were a great combo. They delivered their lines well and had a full devotion to their roles. Even if the movie isn't serious it is nice to see the actors take it seriously as well. And for a film making light of death and spoofing the many, many movies about hillbilly murder rampages, Tucker and Dale has a lot of heart. Friendship through all and general human goodness in the light of horrible tragedy. But that may be getting to philosophical for a movie called Tucker and Dale VS. Evil.

3 out of 4 stars. Not 3.5 because I didn't laugh out loud the whole time, I mostly just enjoyed watching the film.

-Christopher O'Connell

"I always knew that if someone like me went for someone like you, people would end up dead."

The Guard: A Quick Review

2012-01-06T00:19:00.000-05:00

Redbox and Netflix Instant are really encouraging this movie watching habit of mine. So much so that I start to forget about what movies I've watched and fail to post a review. That's on me. The Guard is a little limited release film that won pretty universal acclaim. The trailer made me laugh and I'll see anything with Brendan Gleeson.

Sargent Gerry Boyle (Brendan Glesson) is a foul mouthed, racist, drug using, weapon stealing police officer near Gallway, Ireland. But he's not bad at his job, just a little immune after a long time on the job. He's a realist, he might act dumb but he knows whats happening in his town. So he knows that all the other cops are on the pay when a group of smugglers start shipping in millions of dollars worth of cocaine. He is joined by FBI agent Wendell Everett (Don Cheadle) who has been tracking the cocaine since it left some South American country. Everett is pretty straight edged but falls for Boyle's racist musings and helps him bring down the bad guys.

There's not much to say about The Guard. If you like small films that are dialogue heavy in an irish brogue you will enjoy it. It's pretty funny, entirely thanks to Brendan Gleeson who is fantastic. You might not laugh out loud but it is a pretty solid film that I certainly did not regret renting.

3 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Reservoir Dogs: A Quick Review

2012-01-05T19:33:00.000-05:00

It's no secret that I personally detest Quentin Tarantino. Not that I am an expert or anything (which I certainly am not) but the man thinks that he is God's gift to directing. Nothing makes me want to vomit more than a director that is so full of himself that it bleeds through every scene. Of which there is only about five scenes in any given movie of his. Granted, now I've only seen two of his films. Kill Bill Vol.1 made me want to vomit all over the place. I was so bored that I was hoping Uma Thurman would die. I will never see Kill Bill Vol. 2 willingly. The other film of Tarantino's I saw was Inglourious Basterds. The twice spelled wrong history screwing 4-scene epic was only carried by the talent of it's two incredible leads, Brad Pitt and Christoph Waltz. Everyone who lists Basterds as their favorite film should be lined up against the wall, and given a stern talking to. With all that said, crazy ranting aside about how much I hate Tarantino, Reservoir Dogs is one of the best movies I have ever seen.

The subject is simple: multiple "professionals" are hired by a mob boss to hit a jewelry store that is carrying very valuable rough-cut diamonds for one day only. All of the men are given fake names: Mr. brown, blue, pink, blonde, orange and white. The jewelry heist goes awry, Mr. blue and brown are killed by the cops. The rest make it back to the rendezvous point. But Mr. Orange is suffering from a gunshot wound and Mr. Pink is convinced that the police had an informant in the group resulting in the botched robbery. The plot is further thickened when Mr. Blonde reveals that he has taken a cop hostage. The men argue with each other in the small space trying to find out who sold them out to the police.

The film is superbly acted, many of the faces are recognizable but the only real name in the film is Steve Buscemi. The constant sense of claustrophobia, the whodunnit atmosphere and the incredible pacing result in an absolutely fantastic crime film. Which I hate to say because it is a Tarantino film. I'm not giving him complete credit because Reservoir Dogs borrows very heavily from the Chinese film City on Fire, but this is a fantastic directorial debut and any student of film should be happy to have it on their shelf. Go see it, I'm serious.

4 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Young Adult

2012-01-04T18:13:00.001-05:00

As far as I am concerned, Jason Reitman is one of the best new(ish) directors in the business. Thank You For Smoking was hilariously satirical, Juno was groundbreaking in that everyone wants to have an Ellen Page of their own, and Up In The Air was Oscar worthy in every sense of the word. Three hits in a row, Reitman was pumping out success after success. Then here comes Young Adult to ruin this wonderful streak. At least he got the hat trick. It's not that Young Adult is a bad film, it is just completely on a lower level than Reitman's other films.

Mavis Gary (Charlize Theron) was prom queen, homecoming queen, the prettiest girl in high school and in a small Minnesotan town, the only one who looked like they might actually go somewhere. In between marathons of Keeping up with the Kardashians and guzzling down diet coke like its water, Mavis is a ghost writer for a very popular young adult (ha get it?) series for teenage girls. Mavis constantly dresses like its bed time and the only sign of life in her bleak apartment is her little poofball of a dog.

Then one day Mavis gets an email from her ex-boyfriend that he is having a kid. Convinced that he must be miserable in their home town, Mavis goes back to try and reconnect with Buddy (Patrick Wilson). One problem, he's married and pretty happily at that.

If there is any movie that will make you feel bad for the pretty girl in high school, its this one. But right when you do, the movie goes right ahead and says, "F--- pretty girls, you shouldn't care for them."

Charlize Theron is fantastic as the grown up prom queen. She is a fantastic actress in general but the facial expressions, or lack of, are so real I feel like I'm back in the hallway hoping the pretty girls will talk to me. But luckily, the other side of high school is represented by Patton Oswalt as Matt. In high school Matt was taken out behind the school and beaten with a crowbar by the jocks because they thought he was gay. Now, Matt is a cripple living at home with his sister, forced to limp everywhere. His realism contrasts against Mavis' stupid optimism about her future with Buddy.

The acting is amazing. The range of emotion between Patton Oswalt and Charlize Theron is award worthy. If only the content was as well. Even though this is labeled as a comedy, you won't leave the theater thinking it was. While some parts are funny, some endearing, and some sad, all of it is a depressing look at life after popularity.

I just wanted someone to learn something. Mavis' cries for help go unheeded by even her parents. She finally admits she might be an alcoholic and they brush it off like its nothing. I wanted to cry, someone help her. The only person trying is Matt and she blows him off like her parents blew her off. But in the end, the one chance Mavis has to learn something, and honestly she did, this stupid #%$@% comes in and ruins it all just because she wanted to be popular like Mavis. I couldn't believe it. And Mavis, like the conceited girl she is, accepts it and goes back to her life unchanged.

I was so depressed, no one learned anything, there was no moral that I could see and if that's the point of the movie well bravo Jason Reitman, you did it. I just don't know what it is.

2 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Happy New Year!

2012-01-01T12:45:00.001-05:00

Happy New Year! Just a shout out to Joe and Chris O (and others) who have been contributing consistently to reach a total of 277 reviews. Congratz and keep it up!

- Andrew J, the site Admin.

The Descendants: A Quick Review

2011-12-25T20:11:00.001-05:00

George Clooney had another movie out this year, since he is still one of Hollywood's most bankable stars and his films are often great Oscar bait. He stars in "The Descendants" with the girl from the popular ABC Family series, "The Secret Life of the American Teenager" and Jeff Bridges' brother, Beau.

Clooney's character, Matt King and his family have to deal with his wife being in a coma after she is involved in a boating accident. He also is involved in selling a large sum of large in Hawaii that his family owns.

The film is often times depressing, but luckily Clooney is wonderful and convincing in his role. He has to deal with his two daughters, who really can't relate to and cope with unfortunate events surrounding his wife's personally life. All of this seemed genuine, at least to me, which is nice because this man gets paid a ton so movie goers all over the world can be convinced by the characters he plays.

In case anyone was wondering, the island of Hawaii is beautiful, and there are probably hundreds of separate shots proving this point.

A negative note: the older daughter is a little too sassy for my liking, but I still prefer her to the younger daughter, who is just awkward, annoying, and says dumb, embarrassing things that she should be ashamed of.

Also, the musical score added to the film as a whole, since it was full of ukuleles, and other Hawaiian instruments. After a while it got to be a bit much, or that may just be me being too judgmental.

Overall I enjoyed the movie. I like when movies are not full of mirth and happiness, because unfortunately life is not always like this. Movies should attempt to reflect reality, if the genre calls for it. In this case it added to the emotional tone of the film and was another way to showcase Clooney. Finally, as Clooney movies go I prefer "Up in the Air" from a couple years ago, but "The Descendants" was good too.

3 out of 4 stars

-Joseph Sbrilli

The Ides of March

2011-12-25T16:32:00.000-05:00

Believe it or not I am still part of this blog. I just have been far too tired to contribute the past couple of months, and have only been to the theaters a couple. One of these such times was "The Ides of March," which was at the end of October, so I apologize for the questionable review that is about to follow.

The film was directed by two time winner of the People Magazine's coveted "Sexiest Man Alive" award, George Clooney. He stars with some of the most talented people currently working in Hollywood, including the likes of Ryan Gosling, Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Paul Giamatti, and Marisa Tomei. Rachel Evan Wood and Jeffrey Wright also has a decent sized roles, I just don't like them as much as the others.

This movie is extremely political so if you don't like that sort of stuff, then by all means stop reading this review and do something else with you time and brian cells. I personally usually enjoy political movies, which is off because politics confuse me and in real life I don't concern myself with such things. In this movie Clooney plays Governor Mike Morris, who is campaigning for the United States' presidency. If he wins in Ohio then it's essentially a done deal that he will be the Democratic candidate in the election. Gosling plays Stephen Meyers, Morris' Junior Campaign manager. All sorts of scandals come up including affairs with interns (which is stupid idea and people should never do it!) and secretive meetings with members of the competition including Giamatti's role as Wright's character's campaign manager, who is also vying for the Democratic nomination. People's loyalty is put into the question all lots of unexpected things occurr...or at least a couple do.

While watching the trailer, the moment I saw Marisa Tomei on screen I instantly decided I was going to see this movie. That makes me a bit biased I suppose, but I can't help it. She is talented, looks great, and I've enjoyed seeing her in three movies in theaters this year. The rest of the cast is great as well, including Giamatti who has probably the funniest line in the movie, which I won't spoil, because most people might not even find it as amusing as I did. Clooney proven yet again why he is one of the most respected actors currently in Hollywood. He is talented on screen, as well as behind it, and like Cary Grant before will mostly like be acting well into his 60s, and having women half his age fall for him. If your George Clooney you don't even have to pursue women, they do that for you. Ryan Gosling and Philip Seymour Hoffman are also incredibly talented, and worked well with Clooney as other cast members. I just can't comment on every single person in this movie.

If we are being honest with ourselves, I am going to have to watch this movie again. Like with most movies I just confused and forgetful my first time watching it. However, I will say that the last half of the movie was more interesting to me. The beginning is a tad slow, but eventually picks up speed and becomes more engaging. Also, don't be surprised if the movie ends abruptly. I like that in movies. It's very European, but I understand that this may anger some people, so just wanted to give a heads up about that.

If political movies or any member of the talented cast interests you, then give the movie a try. I'm sure you can rent it for a dollar somewhere. At the vary least the above poster is one of the greatest, most creative posters my eyes have ever seen.

3 out of 4 stars.

-Joseph Sbrilli

Mission Impossible 4: Ghost Protocol

2011-12-24T17:15:00.000-05:00

Tom Cruise is the guy who didn't get invited to the party. Somehow he heard about it and showed up anyways. He tried to be funny and charming but no one was buying it so he resorted to hurting himself to entertain the audience, eventually winning them over. And when I mean hurting himself, I mean going all-out with life endangering moves that no one could be unimpressed by. And that's why you keep slipping him notes telling him that a party may be coming up soon because you wouldn't want to miss what he might try next.

Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol is continuing the new tradition of reviving a series long after it's designated trilogy time has ended. And while some series needed to stay dead (Indiana Jones) other ones have actually become better with the 4th or even 5th films (Fast Five). Ghost Protocol falls into this category and the fourth installment is by far the most realized and entertaining in the entire series. I would rate number 3 as the next best.

Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) is back as everyone's favorite secret agent. The only real returner to the series is Benji (Simon Pegg) who had a brief role in the third one but was entertaining enough that they kept him on. Some regulars show up later on but two newbies take the coveted extra spots on the team: the token hot girl Jane (Paula Patton) and mysterious Brandt (Jeremy Renner). I believe Renner is being bred to be the new star of the Mission Impossible series because hey, he's already going to be the next Bourne, why not play every spy Hollywood has to offer?

Hunt is on the trail of Cobalt, a nationalist Russian who believes that the path to peace is total nuclear war. Cobalt is one step ahead of Hunt, having already acquired a nuclear device and the ability to shoot it. He also bombs the Kremlin and sticks the blame squarely on the IMF, Hunt's CIA-ish overlords. The United States disavows the entire IMF, branding Ethan and the team terrorists. So without backup and government funding (besides the considerable stash they already have) the crew must figure out a way to stop Cobalt.

James Bond called, he wants his gadgets back. Mission Impossible called back, they said maybe you shouldn't have gone off the deep end and made two crappy movies where the only gadget is a smartphone and a defibrillator. Ghost Protocol wins. I've never been more pleased with the gadgets used: an amplifier that distracts guards, a tarp that copies an image completely hiding a hallway from prying eyes, and superglue gloves allowing Tom Cruise to Spiderman the Burj Khalifa in Dubai.

This is the part where I would soil my pants

And even better, the face making machine from the third film, which made it way too easy to impersonate someone, breaks down and they're forced to go in without it. I was awed, impressed and kind of turned on. Testosterone flows through this film like a roid-raged deadweight lifter. I lost count of how many scenes have Tom Cruise running like a full-grown mountain lion was chasing him. Except he would be chasing the mountain lion because Tom Cruise doesn't play by the rules.

This fourth entry is fantastic, Simon Pegg is hilarious, Renner is a great addition, Patton looks great in a dress and Cruise is out there, brutalizing his body, to give us the very best in action sequences. The stylish directing of Brad Bird (Ratatouille, The Incredibles) is evident throughout the film and the beautiful camera work doesn't waste any scene.

Except for one. The very last one, where they have to nicely wrap everything up. But they didn't need to. And it just kept going. My friend next to me quietly pleaded, "Please stop talking." But Cruise and company just kept on chatting. It was awful.

But that is the only bad part in a film that is doing its very best to impress you. Luckily it succeeds and if this is the future of the series, I can't wait to see what they do next.

3.5 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Sherlock Holmes 2: A Game of Shadows

2011-12-23T20:07:00.001-05:00

Enjoying Robert Downey Jr. should be my job. Every movie I've seen him in, whether it be good or bad, I am inclined to like just because of his smiling face. I need him to play a bad guy or something, but I'd probably just love it even more because of his range.

Downey Jr. is again bringing his insatiable charm to the age-old Sherlock Holmes character. As a self professed Sherlock Holmes expert (I read the books....once) I can quite confidently say that this film is nothing like the books. Except it very much is. This new adaptation of Holmes is unique enough in itself that it could have easily just been called "steam punk detective" but familiar enough that Holmes fans, Downey Jr. fans, and action movie fans should all be satisfied.

Sherlock Holmes (Downey Jr.) is onto the trail of Professor James Moriarty (Jared Harris). Moriarty, in the books, was Holmes' greatest adversary, able to outwit him and the criminal mastermind behind almost every major crime in Europe. In the movie, it's pretty much the same thing. Moriarty is effectively trying to bring about World War I a couple decades earlier for his own benefit. Due to Sherlock's meddling, Dr. Watson (Jude Law) is forced away from his honeymoon with his new wife to help Holmes stop Moriarty. They also pick up a gypsie (Noomi Rapace) whose brother is pivotal in Moriarty's plan.

The first Sherlock Holmes came out in 2009 and was pretty well-received. It had a few fantastical elements in it, but the quick style, clever camera work and a rousing performance by Downey Jr. made it a hit. Sherlock Holmes knew it was clever and that cleverness has carried itself into the new film. But they didn't add more intelligence to the film. What they added was so much balls-out action that the line between thriller and action is crossed.

There are a lot more weapons in Game of Shadows, a lot more shooting and even more scenes of Holmes using his keen powers of awareness to quickly beat the crap out of opponents. Besides fully-automatic machine guns (which I don't think they had quite perfected past the Gatling stage at that point) full-fledged artillery pieces make an appearance and they go boom. Oh, and the movie 300 stopped by and dropped off some slo-mo. Fortunately, it's only really utilized in one scene. It looks really impressive and it added a lot to the scene but then it just dragged on and got boring.

But I was never actually bored during the film. That may have been Guy Ritchie's goal. Keep the audience entertained. If a classic Holmes approach has to be sacrificed for the steampunk superhero that is Robert Downey Jr. so be it. If Holmes has to solve everything before the audience can even grasp what he is thinking, so be it too. We will love it all the same.

I blame Robert Downey Jr. and Jude Law for putting Game of Shadows on the same level as the first Sherlock. Because it shouldn't be. They are very entertaining leads and I love watching their friendship on screen. It's hilarious, popcorn busting action at its finest.

It is almost an entirely different film but I would never be able to bring myself to call it a bad one. I would just as easily watch it again. Holmes fans will love the allusions to the books it draws from (they finally included Mycroft, thank god) and movie fans will love the artistic licenses the director has taken. But pray, that they do something a little different in the third film which will surely be made, or else this series might grow stale. We don't need another X-Men The Last Stand on our hands.

3 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

P.S. Robert Downey Jr. riding a pony may be the funniest thing I will see all year.

The Untouchables: A Quick Review

2011-12-21T15:05:00.000-05:00

It's been a while since I absolutely ripped on a movie. Mostly because I don't like to go see movies that are bad. If I think it's going to be bad why see it? I only see movies I'm on the fence about when I hear rave reviews about its execution and style. Sometimes they are god awful (Drive) and sometimes they are just considered to be really good when they're only an okay movie. The Untouchables is in this latter category.

Everyone knows that Al Capone was basically the biggest most powerful mobster in American history. He ruled Chicago with an iron fist. And it was all because of prohibition. The U.S. outlawed booze, everyone still wanted booze, and Capone was one of those enterprising individuals who decided to capitalize on this development. He was raking in the millions and no one could get to him. The Treasury Department (they used to have power) sent in Eliot Ness who surrounded himself with men who were untouchable, in that they couldn't be bought or bribed. They never could pin anything on Al Capone except that the man had never filed income taxes for several years. Of all the murders and racketeering they could only bring him up on income tax evasion charges, go figure. Capone went to jail and Ness became a hero with Capone eventually succumbing to syphilis in Alcatraz.

That's real life, The Untouchables is like Eliot Ness' boyhood wet dream about taking down a gangster. There's gunfights, there's dramatic take downs, there's a courtroom scene and best of all a revenge killing. All of which, NEVER HAPPENED. Even me, with very little understanding of courtrooms gleefully called out bull crap every time a ridiculous situation came about. The jury is obviously bribed? Get a new jury. Nope the judge doesn't want to do that because he's bribed too. They switch juries with the courtroom next door so they aren't bribed? Pretty sure that's illegal. Capone's lawyer pleads guilty even thought Capone says not guilty? The lawyer said he's guilty it must be true. There's no laws protecting against erratic lawyers huh?

The people who died, didn't die in real life. Kevin Costner straight up revenge kills a dude who in real life died about 7 years later of a suicide. Two of the "untouchables" get brutally murdered in the film. Real life, spoiler, they lived. And probably never got shot at.

It's not that the movie is bad, it's just silly. And horribly inaccurate. There's decent acting, but there's also incredibly cheesy moments in some gunfights. And don't get me started on that stupid end shootout at the train station. A baby? Really? I couldn't believe what I was seeing. If this is on anyone's top 10 gangster films I want you to slap them right across the face and tell them films 1-10 should be Goodfellas. There's a quality mob film right there.

2 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Live Free or Die Hard: A Quick Review

2011-12-20T18:11:00.000-05:00

Arguably the most ridiculous entry into the series. And by ridiculous, I mean ridiculously awesome. First of all, I thought this movie was going to be so stupid I might actually have a brain anuerism. And even sadder, it was the very first entry into the Die Hard series that I had the privilege of viewing. Fortunately I waited until the unrated version came out on DVD (Note to Hollywood, don't tone down Die Hard with a pg-13 rating. That is just stupid). What Live Free loses in plot and character it makes up for in the craziest action possible.

For the fourth entry, McClane is back in D.C. trying to keep a whiny Justin Long from getting killed by hackers who have figured out how to systematically shutdown the entire infrastructure of the United States. They're only mistake? You can't shut down John McClane with a computer. So they try to do it with his daughter, but that just made him angrier.

Live Free or Die Hard is probably the weakest in the series. Developers seemed to understand this so they made up for it by upping the action to 11. Not only does John McClane kill a helicopter with a car, he also explodes a fighter jet. And since this is the 2000's he also dispatches several parkour-ninja masters with good old fashioned American scrap fighting. Turn off your brain and enjoy the getting old jokes because I heard they're going to be making number 5 pretty soon. And if it is as good as all the others I won't care how ridiculously old Bruce Willis is at this point. Just give him a gun and an ideology to protect and I will be happy.

P.S. love the New Hampshire reference. What a ridiculous state motto. REPRESENT.

3 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Die Hard With a Vengeance: A Quick Review

2011-12-20T17:20:00.001-05:00

Picture this: several Hollywood executives are talking about making another sequel in the Die Hard franchise. But they don't want it to get stale. How can we make Die Hard even awesomer without doing the same thing for the third time? It's impossible several of them say. But one pipes up, "What if we put Samuel L. Jackson in the movie?" The executives look at each other and collectively go to the bathroom to change their pants.

And lo and behold they put in a racial tension gimmick to keep the series fresh without making it stale. I love it when a plan comes together.

This time, finally, McClane is in New York. A mysterious man starts phoning the police making McClane and his new black sidekick run around the city trying to keep bombs from going off, while meanwhile they try to pull off the biggest bank heist in history. It's a little more believable than the second one but it's still a little bit out there.

But god it is just as funny and awesome. I would say there is significantly less action/shooting in this third one but the tension and the pacing is just right throughout the film; giving the audience that edge of seat feeling throughout. I'm starting to think that the makers of Die Hard really hate Germans though. Or Aryan looking people in general. Because they are always the bad guys, and they get killed. A lot.

Die Hard 3 is just as good as the other Die Hard's with the added bonus of Mr. Jackson smack talking Bruce Willis. I laughed and clapped the whole way through.

3.5 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Die Hard 2: Die Harder: A Quick Review

2011-12-20T17:09:00.000-05:00

Just in time for Christmas, I finally saw every single Die Hard film. And oh man is it hard to rank them. Obviously, number one is the best but the other 3 are so gleefully violent and fun that it's hard not to say they're all the best.

Anyways, Die Hard 2 brings back everyone's ass-kicking, one line spewing, grizzled detective John McClane. Not content to stumble into one terrorist plot in the first film, McClane decides to discover another one just in time for the holidays, again. Last time it was in L.A. For some reason this time it's in D.C. No one really knows why, especially since McClane is a New York cop. I'm pretty sure it is because his wife is super annoying and makes him travel all around.

So McClane is again at the wrong place at the wrong time (FOR THE BAD GUYS) waiting in Dulles international airport for his wife's plane to land. And again, Christmas is fast approaching. What the airport doesn't know is that a group of former U.S. soldiers (who are very Aryan looking and sounding) are planning on shutting down the airport in order to smuggle out some famous dictator/drug dealer in exchange for living on a beach for the rest of their lives. They plan to do this by killing all electronics at the airport in a snowstorm forcing all incoming plans to circle until they will eventually crash land. John McClane declares this to be bullshit and runs off gun in hand to shoot everyone in the face.

Now Die Hard was kind of believable. As in the plot could totally happen. The punishment that McClane goes through would kill any lesser man but the overall story is sound. Die Hard 2 tries to make the audience think that if Dulles doesn't have lights than every plane coming in there is doomed. Even thought Ronald Reagan Int. Airport is right down the road. And so is Baltimore. And Philadelphia. And technically New York. Plot believability is effectively suspended at that point.

But it doesn't matter because you came to see some action! And there is action. So much action. It is fantastic, with lots of cheesy one liners and of course Bruce Willis saying Yippykayay mother ------. Another solid entry into probably the best action series ever.

3.5 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

The Muppets

2011-12-11T13:37:00.000-05:00

It’s time to play the music, it’s time to light the lights, it’s time to get re-introduced to the Muppets. That’s not quite how the theme song goes but for longtime fans of Kermit and pals, getting back with the gang is as easy as singing along. But for those who didn’t grow up with the Muppets, this shouldn’t be the first movie you see.

Walter is a Muppet growing up in SmallTown, U.S.A. All his life he watched The Muppet Show with his human brother Gary (Jason Segel). Finally, Walter, Gary and Gary’s girlfriend Mary (Amy Adams) take a trip to Los Angeles to sightsee and visit the old Muppet’s studio. But when they get there, the old Muppet’s studio is a rundown poorly managed mess. Exploring by himself, Walter accidentally stumbles upon a secret meeting run by oil baron Tex Richman (Chris Cooper) who has plans to tear down the Muppet studio to drill for the oil underneath.

Horrified, Walter, Gary and Mary find Kermit the Frog and convince him to get the whole gang back together. After finding the old crew the Muppets put on one last show/telethon to raise the 10 million dollars needed to save the studio.

Boy is it good to see the Muppets again. “Muppet Treasure Island” was basically on repeat my entire childhood. “A Muppet’s Christmas Carol” gets even more air time than “Elf” around Christmas time. So when multiple, incredibly creative Muppet trailers started to hit the airwaves early this year, no one was more excited than me.

Except for maybe Hollywood in general. Celebrity cameos abound in “The Muppets”: Alan Arkin, Whoopi Goldberg, Jack Black, and Zach Galifianakis to name just a few. Everyone is excited for the return of the Muppets.

Right from the beginning there are self-aware, fourth wall breaking jokes that make the Muppets more than just talking puppets. “That sounds like an important plot point; I hope the audience was listening.” For kids and parents alike the jokes are a clean return to form.

And like every Muppets movie, the music is a stellar example of songwriting and love of the source material. Musical group Feist and Bret Mackenzie of Flight of the Concords helped Jason Segel write and perfect the music.

But for everything “The Muppets” does right, it does an equal amount wrong. First would be the introduction of the newest Muppet, Walter. I never knew a Muppet to be annoying but somehow they found a way. Instead of more screen time to classic characters, most of it is pushed onto Walter’s poorly designed shoulders. Characters that needed more jokes get pushed to the side after their reintroduction to never make much of an impact later. Not to mention that a certain Rizzo the rat gets absolutely no screen time at all while Walter gets his own solo number.

The biggest problem of all about “The Muppets” is the lack of space for new fans. The old ones are all here, crowding the movie theater. But potential new fans will sit outside wondering what in the world they just saw. References to Muppet Show classics will go right over their heads and the same self-aware jokes that old fans appreciate can come off as lazy joke-writing when it happens several times.

Otherwise, “The Muppets” is still an insanely clever, enjoyably giddy trip down memory lane. Just make sure you’ve already been down the lane.

2 and a half out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Tower Heist

2011-11-27T11:46:00.000-05:00

It has been a very long time since Eddie Murphy was in anything remotely funny. A series of awful films (not including the “Shrek” franchise, at least not all of them) has plagued his career. Leave it to Brett Ratner of “Rush Hour” fame to revive that career in an ensemble comedy about sticking it to the man.

Josh Kovacs (Ben Stiller) is the general manager for The Tower, the most expensive apartment complex in New York City. The residents of The Tower are incredibly wealthy and Kovacs job is to keep them as happy as possible. He does this by making sure his staff are the best in the business and follow a strict set of rules. The Tower’s richest occupant is Charlie Shaw, a Wall Street executive. All of the employee’s pensions were invested by Shaw at Kovacs request. But Shaw has been running a Ponzi scheme and lost all of his investors and The Tower’s employee’s money. So Kovacs, a few disgruntled employees and his childhood-friend-turned-thief Slide (Eddie Murphy) hatch a plan to rob the secret stash of money they know is in Shaw’s penthouse apartment.

The comedy lies in the cast. Eddie Murphy is hilarious as the veteran thief. Casey Affleck, Michael Pena, Matthew Broderick, and Gabourey Sidibe of “Precious” fame get equal screen time and almost every line was met with laughter. This is a classic example of comedy gold, take a character and make them do something they would never do in their lives. Here we have all these do-good nine to five employees running around a mall stealing things because Slide is trying to train them in the art of thievery.

There is only one professional thief among them and even he isn’t as good as he would like to be. But unlikely allies make likeable heroes.

What “Tower Heist” has in its cast, it loses in the plot. This is one of those movies where absolutely everything has to go right in order for the main characters to succeed. Or the exact right things had to go wrong at the right time. There were many moments when questions that started with, “but wait, how did they…?” popped in my head. Realism isn’t something to be counted on in a Brett Ratner film.

But, by God, the cast is going to pretend it is. Movies that the cast don’t take seriously get ruined. There was only one part in “Tower Heist” where the line between watchable and farce was crossed. Ben Stiller utters the line, “That’s it, I don’t want you talking to me for the rest of the robbery.” The entire audience laughed awkwardly and even Ben Stiller seemed to grimace after saying it. It just wasn’t a line that someone would say in that sort of situation.

The film is a ridiculous affair. But it is an enjoyable one. A crazy plot can always be saved by great actors and smart writing. And who doesn’t love a story where rich Madoff characters get their come-uppance?

3 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

2011-11-14T13:21:00.000-05:00

For those with Netflix, I am sorry about the whole price change thing, that was really dumb, but if you stuck with the instant streaming you are in luck. Multiple websites point out IMDB's top 200 movies on Netflix instant. It is a godsend on a lonely friday night and that's how I found myself finally watching the critically acclaimed mindbending trip-a-thon that is Eternal Sushine.

The story, kind of like Memento, is hard to sum up but it basically goes down like this: In Jim Carrey's world there is a procedure that can erase a person from your memory. By using a mri machine, doctors can go in and erase painful memories. The movie works backwards but Jim Carrey discovers that his previous girlfriend erased him. So he decides to erase her. Most of the film takes place in Carrey's mind as he watches memories of her fade away starting with the most recent and working back. By the end he discovers he doesn't want her erased completely but it is too late. The film is way more complicated but that just gives you a sense of what is going on.

It can get confusing but it is grounded in some fine performances. Carrey is very good and Winslet is also, but I couldn't help shake the feeling that she was the wrong person for the part. What really makes the movie good is the emotion of watching your life fade to black before your eyes. And the strain it puts on the mind. Carrey goes through several revelations about life but the instant he realizes them, they are erased. It's a sad movie but it's also a happy movie and in the end I didn't really end up feeling either.

The movie is great but many times I just didn't like the characters. Sometimes Carrey's character is a douche and Winslet's character is just plain crazy. But overall I am glad I saw it. Not sure if I'd be able to put my mind through this psuedo-romance blender again but it is definitely worth a watch.

3 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Everything Must Go: A Quick Review

2011-10-31T13:30:00.000-04:00

Dramedies (dramadys?) are great. They combine the best of both worlds. You get to laugh and then you get to cry and then probably laugh again. It's just like real life! Except all the boring parts are taken out. Anyways, last year Everything Must Go hit the indie circuit and finally got a sorta bigger release and I was lucky enough to see it.

Will Ferrell is Nick Halsey, an alcoholic sales associate at a very nice firm. Actually, a former sales associate. After falling off the wagon and celebrating a little too hard, Nick got into a potentially damning situation with a female employee. He was fired and when he got home he discovered that his wife left him and put all of his belonging out on the front yard. She also blocked all his bank accounts. Don't trust women kids. Nick decides to hold a yard sale on his front yard (using the money mostly to purchase pabst blue ribbon) and hopefully eventually recover from alcoholism and win his wife back. Hint: he only does one of those things because his wife sucks.

Will Ferrell is great. I loved him in the okay-movie Stranger Than Fiction. He is very good in a dramatic role and portrays a recovering alcoholic very well. I laughed with him, I cried with him and I just plain enjoyed this movie. It's kind of sad if you really think about it but it ends on a cheery note and you can't help but feeling good about life. I want to watch it again right now in fact.

Featuring a breakout performance by C.J. Wallace (Notorious B.I.G.'s son) and some sharp, witty writing. Will Ferrell proves himself to be more than just a funnyman.

3 and a half out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

P.S. why doesn't he just break a window and get into the house? That always bugged me.

Days of Glory (Indigenes): A Quick Review

2011-10-26T13:23:00.000-04:00

I love war movies. I like action and I love the drama that always goes along with them. I waited a long time to see Days of Glory. It got a limited release and it never hit my local movie store. Finally my college library had it. Score.

In WW2, France kind of got the short end of the stick. As in they got absolutely violated up and down the continent of Europe. But before that (and before WW1) France was pretty dominant in the world. They had a few colonies in Northern Africa who, although being treated like slaves, were still loyal to France. When France finally got back on its feet, they recruited young arabs from Algiers and Morocco to help fight for them. That part is true. It's also true that these men were basically the African Americans of the U.S. Army. Not treated very well during and after the war. I'm not sure if the story told in Days of Glory is true. Where four arabs are the first into France and defend a town by themselves. Probably not true.

Days of Glory is a decent film. It's got some action, it has likable characters and the story is pretty good. But it does suffer. It suffers from what I like to call, how many bullets can one gun shoot before reloading? Answer: a lot. One guy with a tommy gun has more rounds than a stationary emplacement. And four guys holding off two german squads? Cmon. I need some historical data to back that up before I believe it.

Not the best but certainly not the worst, it's a decent trip into racism on a side you probably have never seen before.

2 and a half out of 4 stars.

-Chris O'Connell

Drive

2011-10-19T13:47:00.000-04:00

Scooby Doo and the case of the most misleading trailer and reviews ever. Sorry, I was thinking of better titles for Drive. Since there's almost no driving, or anything else for that matter. I usually trust rottentomatoes. Drive is currently at a 93%. That means it should be good, right? Wrong. And I will explain after a nice summary.

Ryan Gosling, arguably one of the sexiest men in Hollywood right now (not gay, I swear) stars as driver. That's right, he isn't listed as having a name. Nor does anyone ask. Anyways Driver, is a hollywood stunt driver. We know this because he does exactly ONE stunt in about a 5 minute scene. The only point being it shows that he takes risks and has access to face masks. Driver is also a mechanic at a friend's shop. Those are his day jobs. At night, Driver likes to drive criminals away from their heists and crimes and whatever else criminals do at night.

At some point Driver meets his neighbor who he likes to stare at every time she talks to him. Her name is Irene (Carey Mulligan) and she has a cute little mexican son and a husband who is currently in jail. Obviously she falls in love with Driver even though his vocabulary consists of "thanks" and "no". But then her husband gets out of jail and Irene is all confused. Driver just goes with the flow because he's a driver. But some mob bosses want her husband to get back in the game so Driver helps out. It gets messed up and I don't really care anymore. I'll just sum up the last 20 minutes of the movie. Driver has to kill all these mob guys before they kill Irene and her kid.

There are two movies here. The first movie is about a driver. He drives criminals around but a job gets messed up and he has to kill a lot of people in the most violent ways possible in order to save his girlfriend. I can buy that. The second movie is a romance in which a mother with an estranged husband falls in love with her reclusive but sexy neighbor. I can buy that as well. But both in the same movie? Not a chance.

There is actually a lawsuit about how misleading the Drive trailer is. What they advertised was fast and the furious six. What they got was this arthouse movie that out of nowhere took a turn for Saw levels of gore in the end. Lately, I've been describing it to people as Kill Bill. If Kill Bill had no talking, everyone staring at each other for 2 hours and a body count of about 6. A.K.A. boring. Even when the action started it was only briefly satisfying and the two guys you wanted to see killed, get killed offscreen. What a freaking rip-off. I spent 10.50 on this damn movie and I have never been closer to walking right out of the theater.

Drive, I see your point stylistically. You called with visual stimulation and atmosphere. I raise you a plot, non-wooden characters, decent action, entertainment value and a nonmisleading trailer. Oh, you can't counter? Than I get all the chips baby.

If you're going to have a movie called Drive, have some freaking driving. It started off strong but then there's nothing. Nothing decent anyways, even the getaway scene later on has driving that I could do. I don't want to watch a man drive around in his car for an hour contemplating life and obeying traffic laws, I want to watch him get away from the police guns blazing. The movie should be titled Stare because that's all that happens.

0 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Moneyball

2011-10-04T13:42:00.001-04:00

Quick, name the saddest team in baseball. After this September the answer is the Boston Red Sox, but overall it always seems to be the Oakland Athletics. Despite having a few World Series championships under their belts, the A’s stand as the team that can never seem to win and everyone feels sorry for.

And it all comes down to money. Who has money? The New York Yankees do. Who doesn’t? The Oakland Athletics. This was made painfully obvious in the opening scenes of “Moneyball”. In 2001, the Oakland Athletics made it to the playoffs despite having only a $39 million dollar payroll. They were up against the New York Yankees who had a payroll of $122 million. Of course the A’s lose and the star players that got them there now know that they can make the big money with other teams. The A’s general manager Billy Beane (Brad Pitt) has to put together a new team without the star players that helped them get to the playoffs.

In steps Peter Brand (Jonah Hill), a young economics graduate from Yale. Brand convinces Beane to forgo the usual method of baseball scouting and recruiting and replace it with a system revolving around statistics. Instead of picking players for their look or their swing Beane picks players for their stats like on base percentage. With Brand’s help Beane assembles a ragtag group of cheap players that no other team wants but have good stats that are underappreciated by other teams. They lose pretty badly at the start of the 2002 season, garnering criticism from the entire league for their unorthodox style. But as the season rolls on, the Oakland Atheletic’s start winning more and more games, eventually tying the Major League record of winning twenty games in a row.

Underdog stories are the best. True underdog stories are even better. It was fun watching the A’s, with no “stars” to speak of go up against the highest paid teams in baseball and win. Brad Pitt is one of the best actors around, expertly portraying a general manager putting his job on the line to offset baseball’s money disparity.

Unfortunately, it didn’t pay off. The A’s ended up losing to the Minnesota Twins in the playoffs. The rest of Major League Baseball took notice though, and adopted Beane’s strategy. The movie claims that the Boston Red Sox used the technique to help them finally win their first world series in 86 years. Although, after this season I think they need to relook at their strategy.

Making a boring premise exciting is hard. “Moneyball” makes it happen though. It is an entertaining movie for baseball and non-baseball fans alike. Sometimes it takes itself too seriously, because c’mon, it’s just a game, but for those who love inspirational sports movies, you won’t do much better than “Moneyball”.

-Christopher O'Connell

3.5 out of 4 stars

Warrior

2011-09-21T16:37:00.002-04:00

Ironically, I love inspirational sports movies, but get bored and confused by everything on ESPN. I enjoy the family elements that are added to the films, as opposed to watching an actual game I do not understand, nor really care to. This is precisely the reason why I enjoyed “Warrior.” My new found love for Nick Nolte probably didn’t hurt either.

Nolte plays a former boxer and alcoholic who has been sober for a couple years. He has two sons, Tommy (Tom Hardy) and Brendan (Joel Edgerton) who happen to be into mixed martial arts, which I assume is similar to wrestling or boxing. Brendan needs to win the championship to provide for his family, and his brother’s reason is less heartwarming. He would just like to win the large amount of prize money.

Naturally, you wouldn’t have any conflict in a movie unless the entire family is emotionally hurt by each other. The perfectly cast actors do an outstanding job at conveying this. All of the scenes between the three primary characters always felt genuine. One of the acting highlights for me was a brief scene of Nolte’s character gravitating back towards alcohol.

The film was also incredibly well shot, with a great deal of dimly lit scenes, many of them between Nolte and Hardy. This added to the dramatic aspects of their relationship. Also, the fighting scenes were shot using handheld cameras, getting up close to the action, and adding to the entertainment value and intensity. Aerial and long shots of Atlantic City (where the championship is held), and the adjacent ocean only add to visual appeal.

Finally “Warrior” had a nice mix of emotions. You have your usual inspiring moments (just without Sandra Bullock this time…a brief “The Blind Side” reference ), as well as some dysfunction, and a couple jokes thrown in there for good measure. Also, the pacing of this movie was perfect. It clocks in at over two hours, but is always engaging.

Essentially what all of this means is that if a combination of “Rocky,” “The Fighter,” and every other sports movie known to mankind, sounds appealing to you, then by all means give “Warrior” a try.

3 1/2 out of 4 stars

-Joseph Sbrilli

Contagion

2011-09-20T14:14:00.001-04:00

How many actors can we fit in one movie?

What if we lived in a world where the Bird Flu wasn’t all hype and ended up killing more people than falling vending machines? This is the basic premise of “Contagion”: a deadly virus spreads its way across the world and kills millions of people. This isn’t a far-fetched premise, it happened in 1918. The Spanish Flu killed between 20-40 million people before it petered out.

Star-studded casts are usually reserved for awful romantic comedies but “Contagion” pulled together more award winners than the Oscar broadcast. Laurence Fishburne is the lead doctor for the Center for Disease Control, and works frantically to find a cure for the virus. Gwyneth Paltrow is patient zero, the first one to contract the disease in Hong Kong and carries it to the United States. Matt Damon is her immune husband who watches the world around him die. Jude Law is an internet blogger who exploits the widespread panic to profit from the disease. Kate Winslet is the first responder sent to organize contingency plans and Marion Cotillard is the World Health Organization’s representative in China who gets kidnapped and held for ransom in exchange for a vaccine against the virus.

If this sounds like a lot of threads to keep track of, it is. But director Steven Soderbergh (The “Ocean’s Eleven” series), knows how to handle a lot of plot points. Each character is well developed and none are denied any screen time (except maybe Cotillard). When it’s necessary, Soderbergh isn’t afraid to kill off characters. Gwyneth Paltrow is the first to go in a death scene that is terrifyingly real and must have been a blast to act in.

And that is the driving point of the film. The way it’s laid out feels like it could happen tomorrow. Brian Williams could be telling America about a new disease by the end of the week. While “Contagion” can suffer from boring montages of empty gyms and gene sequencing, its poignancy in a world obsessed with hand sanitizer can’t be overlooked.

“Contagion” is the scariest movie since “Inside Job.” The acting is superb, and if there is one film that will make you change the way you live (or at least the amount of times you touch your face) it is this one. People with queasy stomachs should probably steer clear of “Contagion” but if you’re ready to become a hypochondriac, then I’d catch this virus.

3 and a half out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell