Jokes, Funny Picture, Tips

Funny Pool Jokes

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 17:30:00 +0000

Fun Activities for the Pool

- Scream as someone is jumping off of a diving board.

- Laugh at fat people in swimsuits.

- Tell people you saw the lifeguard peeing in the pool.

- Ask a lifeguard if skinny-dipping is allowed.

- Try to negotiate the price of getting in.

- Take a really long time when you are on top of the high dive and then act as though you were pushed off.

- When in line, ask strangers if they think invisible people get a discount.

- Take your towel, tie it around your shoulders and say “Wheee! I’m Batman!” while running around.

- Hit strangers with your wet towel.

- Throw people’s things into the pool.

- Sing and dance on top of the diving board, then do a belly-flop as your grand-finale.

- Play Marco-Polo by yourself.

- Ask small children if they have seen any suspicious-looking sea monsters lately.

The Ten Most Dangerous Things Users Do Online !!!

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 19:15:00 +0000

1. Clicking on email attachments from unknown senders

2. Installing unauthorized applications

3. Turning off or disabling automated security tools

4. Opening HTML or plain-text messages from unknown senders

5. Surfing gambling, porn, or other legally-risky Websites

6. Giving out passwords, tokens, or smart cards

7. Page 8: Random surfing of unknown, untrusted Websites

8. Attaching to an unknown, untrustworthy WiFi network

9. Filling out Web scripts, forms, or registration pages

10. Participating in chat rooms or social networking sites

Failing maths !

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 15:32:00 +0000

A ten-year-old Jewish boy was failing math. His parents tried everything from tutors to hypnosis; but to no avail.
Finally, at the insistence of a family friend, they decided to enroll their son in a private Catholic school. They had their hesitation putting
their Jewish son in a private Catholic school, but thought his education came first.
After the first day, the boy's parents were surprised when he walked in after school with a stern, focused and very determined
expression on his face. He went straight past them, right to his room and quietly closed the door.
For nearly two hours he toiled away in his room with math books strewn about his desk and the surrounding floor. He emerged long
enough to eat, and after quickly cleaning his plate, went straight back to his room, closed the door and worked feverishly at his studies
until bedtime.
This pattern of behavior continued until it was time for the first quarter's report card. The boy walked in with it unopened, laid it on the
dinner table and went straight to his room.
Cautiously, his mother opened it and, to her amazement, she saw a large red 'A' under the subject of Math.
Overjoyed, she and her husband rushed into their son's room, thrilled at his remarkable progress.
"Was it the nuns that did it?" the father asked.
The boy shook his head and said "No."
"Was it the one-to-one tutoring? The peer-mentoring?"
"No."
"The textbooks? The teachers? The curriculum?"
"No", said the son. "On that first day, when I walked in the front door and saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I KNEW they were
serious!"

Never ! PUT Your PICTURE on The NET ! Never !

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 15:23:00 +0000

Mind blowing question

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 15:19:00 +0000

An Indian and an American are seated next to each other on a flight from
Los Angeles to New York. The American asks if he would
like to play a fun-game.
The Indian, tired, just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and
rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
The American persists and explains that the game is easy
and a lot of fun.
He says, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you
pay
me $5, and vice versa."
Again, the Indian declines and tries to get some sleep.
The American, now worked up, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer,
you
pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $500."
This gets the Indian's attention and, figuring there will be no end to
this
torment, agrees to the game.
The American asks the first question, "What's the distance from the earth
to the moon?"
The Indian doesn't say a word, reaches into his wallet, pulls out a $5 bill
and hands it to the American.
"Okay," says the American, "Your turn."
So the Indian asks, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down
with four legs?"
The American thinks about it. No answer.
Puzzled, he takes out his laptop computer and searches
all his references. No answer!
He taps into the air-phone with his modem and searches
the Internet and the Library of Congress. No answer.
Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and
co-workers.
Checks the input. All to no avail!
Finally, a long time later, he wakes the Indian and hands him $500.
The Indian thanks him and turns back to get his sleep.
The American, more than a little miffed, stirs the Indian and asks,

"Well, what's the answer?"
Without a word, the Indian reaches into his purse, hands the American
$5, and goes back to sleep!

Something About Dreams!!!

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 15:17:00 +0000

Did You Know?

• One third of our lives are spent sleeping.

• In your lifetime you will spend about six years of it dreaming. That is more than 2100 days spent in a different world.

• Everybody dreams. Just because you don’t remember your dreams it does not mean that you didn’t dream.

• We dream an average of one or two hours every night and we often have four to seven dreams in one night.

• Five minutes after the end of a dream, half the content is forgotten. After ten minutes, 99 percent is lost.

• If you are snoring then you cannot be dreaming.

• The word dream stems from the middle English word, ‘dreme’ which means joy and music.

• Men tend to dream more about other men, while women dream equally about men and women.

• People who give up smoking have longer and more intense dreams.

• Toddlers do not dream about themselves. They don’t appear in their own dreams until the age of four.

Joke: Husband reading book and fondling his wife

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 11:04:00 +0000

A married couple is lying in bed one night.
The wife is curled up, ready to go to sleep, and the husband turns his bed lamp on to read a book.
As he's reading, he periodically reaches over to his wife and fondles her special bits.
He does this a few times, but only for a very short interval before returning to read his book.
The wife gradually becomes more and more aroused and, assuming that her husband is seeking some encouragement before going further, gets up and starts stripping in front of him.
The husband is confused and asks, Why are you taking off your clothes?
His wife replies, You were rubbing me downtown. I thought it was foreplay.
The husband says, No, not at all.
His wife asks angrily, Well, what the hell were you doing then?
I was just wetting my fingers so I could turn the pages in my book.

Joke: The Top 5 Gay Star Trek Quotes

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 11:03:00 +0000

5. "Dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor, not a police officer! Besides, the Village People already HAVE a cop!"
4. "All right, who's been running the gladiator program on the holodeck again?"
3. "Orion slave girl, Orion slave guy -- who cares? I'm getting me some green ass!"
2. "Sorry, ensign -- I didn't mean to go quite so boldly."
and the Number 1 Gay "Star Trek" Quote...
1. "Impressive, gentlemen, but that's not what I meant when I said I needed to see Bones."

Joke: Italian French and Aussie guy talking about sex

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 11:02:00 +0000

The Italian says, “When I’ve a finisheda makina da love with my girlfriend I go down and gently tickle the back of her kneesa, she floatsa 6 inches abovea da bed in ecstasy”.
The Frenchman replies, “Zat is nothing, when Ah 'ave finished making ze love with ze girlfriend, Ah kiss all ze way down her body and zen Ah lick zer soles of her feet wiz mah tongue and she floats 12 inches above ze bed in pure ecstasy”.
The Aussie says, “Mate, that’s nothing. When I’ve finished shaggin me sheila, I get out of bed, walk over to the window and wipe me dick on the curtains. And MATE ….. She hits the fucking roof. GO THE AUSSIES

Joke: Three priests and sexy woman

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 11:00:00 +0000

Three priests were in a railroad station on their way home to Pittsburgh.
Behind the ticket counter was a very sexy, shapely, well endowed woman wearing a very tight, skimpy sweater.
She made the three priests very nervous, so they drew straws to determine who would get the tickets.
The first priest approached the window. "Young lady, I would like three pickets to titsburg." He completely lost his composure and fled.
The second priest goes to the window. "Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh and I would like the change in nipples and dimes."
Mortified, he too fled.
"Morons...." the third priest mutters and moves to the window. "Young lady, I would like three tickets to Pittsburgh and I would like the change in nickels and dimes. And, if you insist on dressing like that, when you get to the pearly gates, St. Finger's going to shake his Peter at you."
They took the bus.

Joke: Teacher playing name that animal in class

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 10:59:00 +0000

A teacher playing a game of name that animal with her class.
Eddie's first-grade class was having a game of Name That Animal.
The teacher held up a picture of a cat and asked, "What animal is this?"
"A cat!" said Suzy.
"Good job! Now, what's this animal?"
"A dog!" said Ricky.
"Good! Now what animal is this?" she asked, holding up a picture of a deer.
The class fell silent. After a couple of minutes, the teacher said, "It's what your mom calls your dad."
"A horny bastard!" called out Eddie

joke: Why Mahendra Singh Dhoni has no girlfriends

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 10:59:00 +0000

Question. Why Mahendra Singh Dhoni has no girlfriends?

Answer. Kyunki Sabko pata hai ki woh roz 2 litre doodh pita hai, ab kaun si ladki itna risk legi!!!

Joke: My Private Part Died Today

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 10:58:00 +0000

An old man, Mr. Wallace, was living the last of his life in a nursing home. One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed. Nurse Tracy asked if there was anything wrong.
"Yes, Nurse Tracy," said Mr. Wallace, "My Private Part died today, and I am very sad."
Knowing her patients were forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, she replied, "Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Wallace, please accept my condolences."
The following day, Mr. Wallace was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out his pajamas, when he met Nurse Tracy.
Mr. Wallace," she said, "You shouldn't be walking down the hall like that. Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas."
But, Nurse Tracy," replied Mr. Wallace, "I told you yesterday that my Private Part died."
"Yes, you did tell me that, but why is is hanging out of your pajamas?"

Well, he replied, "Today's the viewing."

Joke: Why bicycles are better than Women...

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 10:58:00 +0000

Bicycles don't get pregnant.

You can ride your Bicycle any time of the month.

Bicycles don't have parents.

Bicycles don't whine unless something is really wrong.

You can share your Bicycle with your friends.

Bicycles don't care how many other Bicycles you've ridden.

When riding, you and your Bicycle can arrive at the same time.

Bicycles don't care how many other Bicycles you have.

Bicycles don't care if you look at other Bicycles.

Bicycles don't care if you buy Bicycle magazines.

You'll never hear, "Surprise, you are going to own a new Bicycle" unless you go out to buy one yourself.

If your Bicycle goes flat you can fix it.

If your Bicycle is too loose you can tighten it.

If your Bicycle is misaligned, you don't have to discuss politics with it.

You don't have to be jealous of the guy who works on your Bicycle.

If you say bad things to your Bicycle, you don't have to apologize before you ride it again.

You can ride your Bicycle as long as you want and it won't get sore.

You can stop riding your Bicycle as soon as you want and it won't get frustrated.

Your parents won't remain in touch with your old bicycle after you dump it.

Bicycles don't get headaches.

Bicycles don't insult you if you're a bad rider.

Your Bicycle never wants a night out with the other Bicycles.

Bicycles don't care if you're late.

You don't have to take a shower before you ride your bicycle.

If your Bicycle doesn't look good you can paint it or get better parts.

You can ride your Bicycle the first time you meet it, without having to take it to dinner, see a movie, or meet its mother.

The only protection you have to wear when riding your Bicycle is a decent helmet.

When in mixed company, you can talk about what a great ride you had the last time you were on your Bicycle.

Joke: Couple having sex in the middle of a dark forest

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 10:57:00 +0000

A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!"

Joke: Three sisters at home with their hubbies

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 10:56:00 +0000

Three sisters wanted to get married, but their parents couldn't afford it so they had all of them on the same day. They also couldn't afford to go on a honeymoon so they all stayed home with their new hubbies. That night the mother got up because she couldn't sleep.
When she went past her oldest daughter's room she heard screaming. Then she went to her second daughters room and she heard laughing. Then she went to her youngest daughter's room and she couldn't hear anything.
The next morning when the men left the mother asked her oldest daughter, "Why were you screaming last night?" The daughter replied "Mom you always told me if something hurt I should scream."
"That's true." She looked at her second daughter. "Why were you laughing so much last night?"
The daughter replied "Mom you always said that if something tickled you should laugh."
"That's also true." Then the mother looked at her youngest daughter. "Why was it so quiet in your room last night?"
The youngest daughter replied "Mom you always told me I should never talk with my mouth full."

Is It Real Or Fake??-02

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 10:52:00 +0000

Tourist Atop World Trade Center, 9/11/01

Giant Skeleton Found in Middle East

Giant Grizzly Bear

Human Remains Found in Crocodile

Black and White Twins

Is It Real Or Fake??-01

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 10:38:00 +0000

Home Computer of the Future as Envisioned in 1954

Highest Bridge in the World

Largest Cat

Air Force Jets in U.S.A. Formation

Tsunami Strikes Phuket , Thailand

Dead Wife in Coffee Table

Spiders Found in Iraq Desert

Three things that even Microsoft can't explain!

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 10:37:00 +0000

MAGIC #1

An Indian found that nobody can create a FOLDER anywhere on the Computer which can be named as "CON". This is something funny and inexplicable… At Microsoft the whole Team, couldn't answer why this happened!
TRY IT NOW, IT WILL NOT CREATE A "CON" FOLDER

MAGIC #2
For those of you using Windows, do the following:
1.) Open an empty notepad file
2.) Type "Bush hid the facts" (without the quotes)
3.) Save it as whatever you want.
4.) Close it, and re-open it.
Noticed the weird bug? No one can explain!

MAGIC #3
Again this is something funny and can't be explained… At Microsoft the whole Team, including Bill Gates, couldn't answer why this happened!
It was discovered by a Brazilian. Try it out yourself…
Open Microsoft Word and type
=rand (200, 99)
And then press ENTER
And see the magic…..!

NOKIA - Useful Universal Code !!

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 10:34:00 +0000

These Nokia codes will work on most Nokia Mobile Phones

(1) *3370# Activate Enhanced Full Rate Codec (EFR) - Your phone uses the best sound quality but talk time is

reduced my approx. 5%

(2) #3370# Deactivate Enhanced Full Rate Codec (EFR) OR *3370#

(3) *#4720# Activate Half Rate Codec - Your phone uses a lower quality sound but you should gain approx 30%

more Talk Time.

(4) *#4720# Deactivate Half Rate Codec.

(5) *#0000# Displays your phones software version, 1st Line : Software Version, 2nd Line : Software Release

Date, 3rd Line : Compression Type.

(6) *#9999# Phones software version if *#0000# does not work.

(7) *#06# For checking the International Mobile Equipment Identity (IMEI Number).

(8) #pw+1234567890+1# Provider Lock Status. (use the "*" button to obtain the "p,w"
and "+" symbols).

(9) #pw+1234567890+2# Network Lock Status. (use the "*" button to obtain the "p,w"
and "+" symbols).

(10) #pw+1234567890+3# Country Lock Status. (use the "*" button to obtain the "p,w"
and "+" symbols).

(11) #pw+1234567890+4# SIM Card Lock Status. (use the "*" button to obtain the "p,w" Go to Top
and "+" symbols).

(12) *#147# (vodafone) this lets you know who called you last.

(13) *#1471# Last call (Only vodofone).

(14) *#21# Allows you to check the number that "All Calls" are diverted to

(15) *#2640# Displays security code in use.

(16) *#30# Lets you see the private number.

(17) *#43# Allows you to check the "Call Waiting" status of your phone.

(18) *#61# Allows you to check the number that "On No Reply" calls are diverted to.

(19) *#62# Allows you to check the number that "Divert If Unreachable (no service)" calls
are diverted to.

(20) *#67# Allows you to check the number that "On Busy Calls" are diverted to.

(21) *#67705646# Removes operator logo on 3310 & 3330.

(22) *#73# Reset phone timers and game scores.

(23) *#746025625# Displays the SIM Clock status, if your phone supports this power saving feature "SIM Clock Stop

Allowed", it means you will get the best standby time possible.

(24) *#7760# Manufactures code.

(25) *#7780# Restore factory settings.

(26) *#8110# Software version for the nokia 8110.

Go to Top

(27) *#92702689# Displays - 1.Serial Number, 2.Date Made, 3.Purchase Date, 4.Date of last repair (0000 for no

repairs), 5.Transfer User Data. To exit this mode you need to switch your phone off then on again. ( Favourite )

(28) *#94870345123456789# Deactivate the PWM-Mem.

(29) **21*number# Turn on "All Calls" diverting to the phone number entered.

(30) **61*number# Turn on "No Reply" diverting to the phone number entered.

(31) **67*number# Turn on "On Busy" diverting to the phone number entered.

(32) 12345 This is the default security code.

press and hold # Lets you switch between lines

NOKIA5110/5120/5130/5190

IMEI number: * # 0 6 #
Software version: * # 0 0 0 0 #
Simlock info: * # 9 2 7 0 2 6 8 9 #
Enhanced Full Rate: * 3 3 7 0 # [ # 3 3 7 0 # off]
Half Rate: * 4 7 2 0 #
Provider lock status: #pw+1234567890+1
Network lock status #pw+1234567890+2
Provider lock status: #pw+1234567890+3
SimCard lock status: #pw+1234567890+4
NOKIA 6110/6120/6130/6150/6190
IMEI number: * # 0 6 #
Software version: * # 0 0 0 0 #
Simlock info: * # 9 2 7 0 2 6 8 9 #
Enhanced Full Rate: * 3 3 7 0 # [ # 3 3 7 0 # off]
Half Rate: * 4 7 2 0 #

NOKIA3110

IMEI number: * # 0 6 #
Software version: * # 0 0 0 0 # or * # 9 9 9 9 # or * # 3 1 1 0 #
Simlock info: * # 9 2 7 0 2 6 8 9 #
NOKIA 3330
*#06#
This will show your warranty details *#92702689#
*3370#
Basically increases the quality of calling sound, but decreases battery length.
#3370#
Deactivates the above
*#0000#
Shows your software version
*#746025625#This shows if your phone will allow sim clock stoppage
*4370#
Half Rate Codec activation. It will automatically restart
#4370#
Half Rate Codec deactivation. It will automatically restart
Restore Factory Settings
To do this simply use this code *#7780#
Manufacturer Info
Date of Manufacturing *#3283#
*3001#12345# (TDMA phones only)

This will put your phone into programming mode, and you'll be presented with the programming menu.
2) Select "NAM1"
3) Select "PSID/RSID"
4) Select "P/RSID 1"
Note: Any of the P/RSIDs will work
5) Select "System Type" and set it to Private
6) Select "PSID/RSID" and set it to 1
7) Select "Connected System ID"
Note: Enter your System ID for Cantel, which is 16401 or 16423. If you don't know yours,
ask your local dealer for it.
8) Select "Alpha Tag"
9) Enter a new tag, then press OK
10) Select "Operator Code (SOC)" and set it to 2050
11) Select "Country Code" and set it to 302 for Canada, and 310 for the US.
12) Power down the phone and power it back on again
ISDN Code
To check the ISDN number on your Nokia use this code *#92772689#

Funny Microsoft Word Trick

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 15:24:00 +0000

Funny Microsoft Word Trick

Try out yourself................

Open Microsoft Word and type

=rand(200,99)

and then HIT ENTER....see what happens.

it won't hurt ur system

Speed up your net by 20%

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 15:23:00 +0000

Microsoft reserves 20% of your available bandwidth for their own purposes like Windows Updates and interrogating your PC etc

You can get it back:

Click Start then Run and type "gpedit.msc" without quotes.This opens the group policy editor. Then go to:

Local Computer Policy >
Computer Configuration >
Administrative Templates >
Network >
QOS Packet Scheduler >
then to Limit Reservable Bandwidth

Double click on Limit Reservable bandwidth. It will say it is not
configured, but the truth is under the 'Explain' tab i.e."By default,
the Packet Scheduler limits the system to 20 percent of the bandwidth
of a connection, but you can use this setting to override the default."
So the trick is to ENABLE reservable bandwidth, then set it to ZERO.
This will allow the system to reserve nothing, rather than the default
20%. It works on Win 2000 as well.

Make ur Desktop Animated

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 15:22:00 +0000

Its a cool trick, just follow these steps:

1. Right click on ur desktop and click properties
2. click desktop [tab] ==> click customize desktop
3. click web [tab]
4. Click New

Now here u have a dialouge box with a bar of Location: in which u have to paste a gif file web url

Note: u can find it from many websites like

Code:

www.jellymuffin.com

Code:

www.coolspacetricks.com

etc,.....

Go any web site that contains gif animations, open a gif file from there and right click it then click on properties it will show u the url link of the gif file, just copy that link and paste in the location bar. Now click ok. A message will apear

[Add Item to Active Desktop] just click ok it will synchronize the item [u dont have to do anything here] after synchronization Click Ok and Ok again and u are done.

Here is a sample of my desktop

50+ "Command Prompt" Commands with Short description For Each !!--03

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 15:21:00 +0000

45. sort

A filter to sort lines in the input data stream and send them to the output data stream.

sort <> outputfilename

Equivalent to the Unix command sort.

46. subst

A utility to map a subdirectory to a drive letter.[3]

subst
subst /D (Deletes the substitute drive)

If SUBST e: c:\edrive were executed, a new drive letter e: would be created, showing the contents of c:\edrive. The opposite can be achieved via the join command.

47. sys

A utility to make a volume bootable.

48. time and date

Display and set the time and date

time
date

When these commands are called from the command line or a batch file, they will display the time or date and wait for the user to type a new time or date and press RETURN. The command 'time /t' will bypass asking the user to reset the time.

The Unix command date displays both the time and date, but does not allow the normal users to change either. Users with superuser privileges may use date -s to change the time and date.

The Unix command time performs a different function.

49. tree

Shows the directory tree of the current directory
Options:
/F (Displays the names of the files in each folder.)
/A (Use ASCII instead of the extended characters.)
/? (Shows the help)

tree [options] [directory]

50. truename

truename
or
truename drivename
or
truename filename
or
truename pathname

If typed without a parameter then the current active drive pathname is displayed.

If typed with a parameter then the command outputs the entire path (full directory and filename) of the path or filename. For example, if the working drive and directory were C:\PROGRAMS and one typed truename fish, the output would be C:\PROGRAMS\FISH. This command also displays the UNC pathnames of mapped network or local CD drives.

This command is an undocumented DOS command. The help switch "/?" defines it as a "Reserved command name". It is available in MS-DOS 5.00.

This command is similar to the Unix which command, which, given an executable found in $PATH, would give a full path and name. The C library function realpath performs this function.

51. type

Display a file. The more command is frequently used in conjunction with this command, e.g. type long-text-file | more.

type filename

Equivalent to the Unix command cat.

52. undelete

Restores file previously deleted with del. By default all recoverable files in the working directory are restored. The options are used to change this behavior. If the MS-DOS mirror TSR program is used, then deletion tracking files are created and can be used by undelete.

Options:

* /list : lists the files that can be undeleted.
* /all : Recovers all deleted files without prompting. Uses a number sign for missing first character.
* /dos : Recover only MS-DOS aware files, ignore deletion tracking file.
* /dt : Recover only deletion tracking file aware files.

undelete [filespec][/list|/all][/dos|/dt]

In Unix and Unix-like systems this differs from filesystem to filesystem. People who use the ext2 filesystem can try the command e2undel.

53. ver

Shows the version of MS-DOS you are using.
Some versions of MS-DOS support an undocumented /r switch, which will show the revision as well as the version.

ver [/r]

Roughly equivalent to the Unix command uname.

54. verify

Enables or disables the feature to determine if files have been correctly written to disk.
If no parameter is provided, the command will display the current setting.[7]

verify [on|off]

55. xcopy

Copy entire directory trees.

xcopy directory [destination-directory]

Equivalent to the Unix command cp when used with -r parameter.

50+ "Command Prompt" Commands with Short description For Each !!--02

noreply@blogger.com (myblog) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 15:19:00 +0000

20. fdisk

Manipulates hard disk partition tables. The name derives from IBM's habit of calling hard drives fixed disks. When run from the command line, it displays a menu of various partitioning operations:

1. Create DOS partition or Logical DOS Drive
2. Set active partition
3. Delete partition or Logical DOS Drive
4. Display partition information
5. Change current fixed disk drive (only available if the computer has more than one hard drive)

FDISK /MBR installs a standard master boot record on the hard drive.

FDISK /MBR #: where # is other partition on system. Completes above command on indicated partition.

eg: "C:\FDISK /MBR D:" would install boot record on D:\ partition.

Fdisk exists under Unix with the same name, but it is an entirely different program. However they share purposes.

21. find

A filter to find lines in the input data stream that contain or don't contain a specified string and send these to the output data stream.

Find may also be used as a pipe.

find "keyword" < ''inputfilename'' > ''outputfilename''

Searches for a text string in a file or files.

FIND [/V] [/C] [/N] [/I] "string" [[drive:][path]filename[ ...]]

/V Displays all lines NOT containing the specified string.
/C Displays only the count of lines containing the string.
/N Displays line numbers with the displayed lines.
/I Ignores the case of characters when searching for the string.
"string" Specifies the text string to find.
[drive:][path]filename Specifies a file or files to search.

If a pathname is not specified, FIND searches the text typed at the prompt
or piped from another command.

Equivalent to the Unix command grep. The Unix command find performs an entirely different function.

22. format

Delete all the files on the disk and reformat it for MS-DOS
In most cases, this should only be used on floppy drives or other removable media. This command can potentially erase everything on a computer's hard disk.
/autotest and /backup are undocumented features. Both will format the drive without a confirmation prompt.

format [options] drive
FORMAT drive: [/V[:label]] [/Q] [/F:size] [/B | /S] [/C]
FORMAT drive: [/V[:label]] [/Q] [/T:tracks /N:sectors] [/B | /S] [/C]
FORMAT drive: [/V[:label]] [/Q] [/1] [/4] [/B | /S] [/C]
FORMAT drive: [/Q] [/1] [/4] [/8] [/B | /S] [/C]
/V[:label] Specifies the volume label.
/Q Performs a quick format.
/F:size Specifies the size of the floppy disk to format (such
as 160, 180, 320, 360, 720, 1.2, 1.44, 2.88).
/B Allocates space on the formatted disk for system files.
/S Copies system files to the formatted disk.
/T:tracks Specifies the number of tracks per disk side.
/N:sectors Specifies the number of sectors per track.
/1 Formats a single side of a floppy disk.
/4 Formats a 5.25-inch 360K floppy disk in a high-density drive.
/8 Formats eight sectors per track.
/C Tests clusters that are currently marked "bad."

Known as a joke among UNIX users of that time since every user on the machine could easily cause damage with just one command. Therefore, it was known in the UNIX community as "The big DOS timesaver".

There is also an undocumented /u parameter for "unconditional" that will write strings of zeros on every sector.
Equivalent to the Unix command mkfs.
Equivalent in RT-11/RSX-11/OpenVMS operating systems line is format command which can not create filesystem. After formatting one should use initialize (contracted to init) command to create filesystem (Equivalent to MS-DOS command format /q or "quick format").

23. help

Gives help about DOS.

MS-DOS

help 'command' would give help on a specific command. By itself, it lists the contents of DOSHELP.HLP. Help for a specific command invokes the command with the /? option. In MS-DOS 6.x this command exists as FASTHELP.
MS-DOS 6.xx help command uses QBASIC to view a quickhelp HELP.HLP file, which contains more extensive information on the commands, with some hyperlinking etc. The MS-DOS 6.22 help system is included on Windows 9x cdrom versions as well.

PC-DOS

PC-DOS 7.xx help uses view.exe to open OS/2 style .INF files (cmdref.inf, dosrexx.inf and doserror.inf), opening these to the appropriate pages.

DR-DOS

In DR-DOS, help is a batch file that launches DR-DOS' online reference, dosbook.

Microsoft Windows

Windows NT, all versions, uses DOS 5 style help, but versions before VISTA have also a Windows help file (NTCMDS.HLP or NTCMDS.INF) in a similar style to MS-DOS 6.

FreeDOS

FreeDOS uses an HTML help system, which views HTML help files on a specified path. The path is stored in HELPPATH environment variable, if not specified, default path is \HELP on the drive which HELP is placed.
Partially equivalent to the Unix command man.

24. intersvr & interlnk

(in MS-DOS; filelink in DR-DOS)

Network PCs using a null modem cable or LapLink cable. The server-side version of InterLnk, it also immobilizes the machine it's running on as it is an active app (As opposed to a TSR) which must be running for any transfer to take place. DR-DOS' filelink is executed on both the client and server.

New in MS-DOS 6.[3]
No direct Unix equivalent, though some Unices offer the ability to network computers with TCP/IP through null modem or Laplink cables using PLIP or SLIP.

25. join

Attaches a drive letter to a specified directory on another drive.[3]

JOIN d: [d:\path]
JOIN [/D] (removes drive assignment)

If JOIN a: c:\floppy were executed, c:\floppy would display the contents of the a: drive. The opposite can be achieved via the subst command.

26. label

Changes the label on a logical drive, such as a hard disk partition or a floppy disk.
In Unix and Unix-like systems, this differs from filesystem to filesystem. e2label can be used for ext2 partitions.

27. loadfix

Loads a program above the first 64K of memory, and runs the program.

loadfix [drive:][path]filename

Included only in MS/PC-DOS. DR-DOS used memmax, which opened or closed lower, upper, and video memory access, to block the lower 64K of memory.[4]

28. md or mkdir

Makes a new directory. The parent of the directory specified will be created if it does not already exist.

md directory

Equivalent to the Unix command mkdir.

29. mem

Displays memory usage.

mem

*
o /CLASSIFY or /C - Lists the size of programs, provides a summary of memory in use and lists largest memory block available.
o /DEBUG or /D - Displays status of programs, internal drivers, and other information.
o /PROGRAM or /P Displays status of programs currently loaded in memory.

Equivalent to the Unix command free.

30. memmaker

Starting from version 6, MS-DOS included the external program MemMaker which was used to free system memory (especially Conventional memory) by automatically reconfiguring the AUTOEXEC.BAT and CONFIG.SYS files. This was usually done by moving TSR Programs to the Upper memory. The whole process required three system restarts. Before the first restart the user was asked whether he wanted to enable EMS Memory or not.

The use of MemMaker was popular among gamers who wanted to enable or disable Expanded memory in order to run a game which required EMS or not. Better results could be achieved by an experienced user manually configuring the startup files to achieve greater free memory yield.

Options:

* /BATCH Runs MemMaker in batch (unattended) mode. In batch mode, MemMaker takes the default action at all prompts.
* /UNDO Instructs MemMaker to undo its most recent changes.

PC-DOS uses another program RamBoost to optimize memory, either the HIMEM/EMM386 or a third-party memory manager.

31. mode

Configures system devices. Changes graphics modes, adjusts keyboard settings, prepares code pages, and sets up port redirection.[5]

32. more

Pages through the output so that you can view more than one screen of text.

command | more

Equivalent to the Unix commands more and less.

More may also be used as a filter.

more < inputfilename

33. move

Moves files or renames directories.

move filename newname
move driveletter:\olddir driveletter:\newdir

Example: move c:\old c:\new

Equivalent to the Unix command mv. DR-DOS used a separate command for renaming directories, rendir.

34. msd

Main article: Microsoft Diagnostics
Provides detailed technical information about the computer's hardware and software.

msd

New in MS-DOS 6;[6] the PC-DOS version of this command is QCONFIG.[citation needed]

No Unix equivalent, however in GNU/Linux similar type of information may be obtained from various text files in /proc directory.

35. pause

Suspends processing of a batch program and displays the message 'Press any key to continue. . .'.

36. pcpark

Parks the hard disk heads in order to enable safe shutdown; only used on early versions.

pcpark

No Unix equivalent.

MS-DOS 3.2 (and possibly others) used the command HHSET

37. print

Adds a file in the print queue.

Options:

* /D device : Specifies the name of the print devices. Default value is LPT1
* /P filename : Add files in the print queue
* /T : Removes all files from the print queue
* /C filename : Removes a file from the print queue

This command was introduced in MS-DOS version 2. Before that there was no built-in support for background printing files. The user would usually use the copy command to copy files to LPT1.

Equivalent to the Unix command lpr

38. rd or rmdir

Remove a directory, which by default must be empty of files for the command to succeed (the /s flag removes this restriction).

rd directory

Equivalent to the Unix command rmdir.

39. rem

Remark statement, normally used within a batch file. An alternative way not to run a specific statement in a batch file is creating a label that will never be used, ::.

On the command line, rem can also be used to create a zero length file by redirecting an empty remark statement to a filename.

rem > newfilename

In Unix, the # sign can be used to start a comment; the zero-length file can be achieved using various methods, such as the touch command or dd.

40. ren

Renames a file. Unlike the move command, this command cannot be used to rename subdirectories, or rename files across drives.

ren filename newname

You can rename files in another directory by using the PATH parameter:

ren [path]|[filename] [newfilename]

An example could be:

ren c:\Windows filex.txt filey.txt

On DOS with long filename support, care must be taken when directories have spaces in their names like "Documents and Settings". In these cases double-quotes are used to enclose them:

ren c:\"Documents and Settings"\"All Users"\Desktop filex.txt filey.txt

Mass renames can be accomplished by the use of wildcards. For example, the following command will change the extension of all files in the current directory which currently have the extension htm to html:

ren *.htm *.html

In Unix, this functionality of a simple move is provided by the mv command, while batch renames can be done using the rename command.

41. scandisk

Disk diagnostic utility. Scandisk was a replacement for the chkdsk utility, starting with later versions of MS-DOS. Its primary advantages over chkdsk is that it is more reliable and has the ability to run a surface scan which finds and marks bad clusters on the disk. chkdsk had surface scan and bad cluster detection functionality included, and was used again on Windows NT based operating systems.

Equivalent to the Unix command fsck.

42. set

Sets environmental variables. See Environment variable.
Since Windows 2000 it can be even used for command line inputs by using Parameter /P

set /p choice=Type your text.
echo You typed: "%choice%"

43. share

Installs support for file sharing and locking capabilities.

share [/F:space] [/L:locks]

/F:space Allocates file space (in bytes) for file-sharing information.
/L:locks Sets the number of files that can be locked at one time.

44. smartdrive

Main article: SmartDrive