Jon and Dana's Excellent Adventure

Texas Part 1

2010-03-24T17:10:00.001-07:00

Devil's Ink Well

Danielle and Luigi have arrived! We picked them up in Albuquerque (try to spell that without looking) and, given the recent snowstorm, decided to head straight for Texas. We put about 150 miles behind us and made it to a place called “DEVIL’S INKWELL!” Duhn duhn duhn! It seems that most everything in the desert belongs to the Devil, a.k.a. “El Diablo.” The inkwell was a part of the Bottomless Lakes State Campground, located just outside of Roswell. Unfortunately, we saw no aliens, just a little trout that Jon caught out of the inkwell. By strange coincidence, U.F.O. sightings always seem to happen when military testing of new experimental aircraft is taking place. The fact that people believe they are seeing U.F.O.’s simply provides a highly effective diversion for the military to cover up its exploits.

Jon and Luigi at Carlsbad Caverns

Next stop – Carlsbad Caverns. We walked our way down the equivalent of 8 stories through room after room of enchanting formations, eerily lit up by small artificial lights. It was difficult to take quality photos in the low light, but we had to try, especially when some formations closely resembled body parts.

Carlsbad Caverns, New Mexico

Carlsbad Caverns, New Mexico

Carlsbad Caverns, New Mexico

Carlsbad Caverns, New Mexico

Carlsbad Caverns, New Mexico

Guadalupe Mountains National Park, Texas

Danielle bustin' out the yoga - Texas

We spent a night on the side of the road and poor Bailey had a run-in with both a cactus and a Javelina. We had to hold him down to get out all the tiny cactus spines out with tweezers. The Javelina came after Bailey when we were gathering firewood. The “firewood” we were collecting was actually dead and extremely prickly pieces of Ocatillo cactus. Bailey came tearing out of the desert growling and snarling with some menacing grunting noises hot on his heels. Jon, Luigi, and I set out with a shotgun in pursuit of the Javelina with no success.

The Earthship - Terlingua, Texas

From there we headed for the Rio Grande. Our friend Cameron advised us to check out a town near Rio Grande called Terlingua. He said that while there, we should check out the local characters, live music at the Starlight Theater, and “The Earthship”. When asked what “The Earthship” was, he simply giggled. “The Earthship” turned out to be a great little shack, cobbled together from various found items, such as tires, corrugated iron, light gage steel, beautiful paintings, etc. There turned out to be many such structures in Terlingua – a place where some very interesting people go to “get off the grid.” However, a strong sense of community was present at the porch in front of the Trading Post. As we sat there, drinking “Texas Busch Light”, and enjoying the warm sun on our faces, a couple of heavily bearded old timers whipped out their guitars and started singing and playing. There were a bunch of locals and tourists hanging out on the porch, enjoying the music as well. After a short while, someone came along with a stand-up bass and joined in. Later, someone else came along, introduced himself to the musicians, and then brought out his percussion instruments and started playing. I didn’t recognize any of the songs, but it was some of the best bluesy country that I’ve ever heard.

Earthship inhabitant

View from the Earthship

Terlingua, Texas

The local message board in Terlingua boasted a weekly farmer’s market, yoga lessons, and land for just $75 per acre. I struck up a conversation with motorcyclist that drove up just in time to miss the massive sand storm. He was from Maine, but drove down every winter to soak up the sun in Terlingua. He said that while there was indeed land for $75 per acre, you might have to drive 70 miles out a dirt road and another 20 on a bulldozer track to find it.

Check this place out for killer live music everynight next time you're in Terlingua, Texas

That evening we had $1 tacos and margaritas at the Twilight Theater while listening to a sister duo performing their original songs. The sisters had grown up in a musical family that used to perform together all over Texas and beyond. They were regulars at the Twilight and nearly everyone, including us, got up to dance. Down the road from the Twilight Theater was the hostel. The hostel office was inside of a bus. The hostel “rooms” were square white tents. There was also a beach volleyball court and a tiny plywood skateboard park/basketball court.

Terlingua Jail

Terlingua was far enough out in the middle of nowhere that it was surprising how young folks there were. Everyone seemed to be especially friendly. I walked from the RV park to the river rafting outfit to look into prices and was stopped twice, and asked if I needed a ride.

Horseback riding in Terlingua, Texas

Danielle and I went for a sunset horseback ride through the abandoned mercury mines. I’ve had some less than satisfying adventures with horses in the past, such as being bitten, bucked off, and carried off on a runaway horse without reins when I was 6. This ride was a big deal because I was literally getting back up on the horse. It turned out to be a fantastic ride. My horse, Blacky, or Midnight, or some such typical black horse name, was pretty good to me,up until the end, when the guide decided to give us all a thrill and took off at a gallop towards the stables, which incited all the horses to chase after.

Dana at the remains of the Mercury Mines

Danielle

Dana in an ore bucket - Big Bend National Park, Texas

Rio Grande, View of Mexico from Texas

Making Pork Butt Tamales in Big Bend National Park Texas

We cooked up some pork butt with beans and ate them in homemade tortillas (thanks Jon Patton for that delicious recipe). We used the leftover stock and pork and beans to make split pea soup and tamales. Danielle showed me how to make tamales that we handcrafted in Big Bend National Park sunshine. We didn’t have a steamer so Jon filled our pot with gravel and water instead. Clever! Topped with spicy enchilada sauce, they were excellent road food!

Luigi, right after he fell in the Rio Grande and bacame part of one of Jon's Tall Tales

Luigi and Jon went fishing in the Rio Grande. The banks were so slippery that Luigi slipped in and was rescued by one of the donkeys on the Mexico side of the River. Or he rescued one of the donkeys. Or Jon rescued both the donkey and Luigi simultaneously. I can’t quite remember, but it was just the first in a series of Jon’s Tall Tales that will have to be recorded for future posterity.

Jon, Danielle, and Luigi at Picture Window View - Big Bend National Park, Texas

Big Bend National Park has a fantastic hot spring located right on the Rio Grande that is one of the nicest I’ve ever been to. I never realized that Luigi was such a hippy that he would go nekkid in hot springs! We went to the hot spring at night so we could enjoy the stars, but the walk back to the car was beyond spooky. All the signs in the park told us that Javelinas are nasty little beasts that hide in the briars just waiting for us to turn our back so they can fly through the air and attack us with their sharp little teeth. Luigi, Danielle, and I were walking the half mile or so back through the woods and we started to wonder where Jon ran off to. All of the sudden, this massive, terrible, black, fearsome creature came snorting and grunting out of the woods. We all screamed like little girls and took off running for the car. We jumped into the truck and slammed down the door locks. About 5 or 10 minutes later, Jon came casually wandering up. We told him how close he was to danger and he shrugged it off. So brave!

Handicapped people need lottery tickets too!

One of the things Texas is famous for

Authentic Reward signs in Crosby's - Ciudad Acuna, Mexico:

The bar where Desperado was filmed

Los Pequenos Mariachis

Danielle in Ciudad Acuna, Mexico

When we reached Del Rio, we hired a cab and headed into Mexico. The border town, Cuidad Acuna, was not very happening at the time, as they were gearing up for spring break. We did meet a goat farmer from Texas there (who looked like he was straight out of "Walker - Texas Ranger"), and he was kind enough to invite us to stay at his goat farm for the night. I was thrilled because I foubnd out that he makes cheese with his goat's milk and it is a dream of mine to do the same. I picked his brain about everything from mating goats to the part that donkeys play on the goat farm. Turns out that one billy can impregnate 50 nannies in one day and donkeys can maintain order on a goat farm by preventing the goats from running away and fending off the coyotes.

Dana playing the Accordion in Ciudad Acuna, Mexico

(Behind me are Jon and The Goat Farmer)

The Goat Ranch

The donkey that minds the goats

Drive-thru convenience store

Luigi - chillin' with a book and some pickles and cheese

(His shirt says "Javelinas love people - They taste like chicken!)

I found something edible!

I bought a book that I'm pretty excited about in Terlingua. It is a North American field guide book for wild edibles and you wouldn't believe how many of the plants you see all the time are edible. The book is arranged by season and I'm attempting memorize spring right now. All the pictures are in color. The book includes instructions for how to cook the various plants, and all the poisonous look-alikes. Now, when I go on a walk, I bring back samples and usually one of them will be edible.

Danielle, Jon, and Luigi on The Riverwalk - San Antonio Texas

On Danielle and Luigi's last day, we walked through San Antonio, Texas. The river walk was beautiful. The city was fairly overcrowded with some convention going on, as well as all the just-joined-up military kids with their families and a ton of mini cheerleaders; 9-12 year olds with more make-up than I've ever worn in my whole life, all dolled up and headed for some giant cheerleading competition. We tried to eat lunch, but every restaurant had such a huge line that we ended up going back to the camper and making tacos.

Danielle at The Alamo - San Antonio, Texas

Saying goodbye to our buddies :(

Texas Part 2

2010-03-15T14:49:00.001-07:00

Yes, That's correct - You can purchase 50 piece chicken nuggets in McDonald's in Texas for only $10.99!!!!

Austin Capitol building

Austin, Texas - “Live Music Capital of the World”. There is a bumper sticker that reads “If you’re listening to American Music – You’re listening to Texan Music”. Like most city dwelling northwesterners, I used to be fiercely opposed to country music. The radio station in the little town of Sitka, replaced my favorite classic rock station with a country music station. The country music played in most of the northwest is little more than pop music with a country accent. Then one day a friend introduced me to bluegrass and a few of the local bluegrass bands that played in Portland – Jackstraw and The Freak Mountain Ramblers. I felt like a whole new world opened up to me. My grandma, who grew up in Texas, introduced me to old school country and I started listening to blues as well. I started to understand where classic rock got its start and its inspiration. It wasn't until our Texan friends, Cam, Margarite, Sara, Brent, Paige, and Lee introduced us to Texan country music that I really fell in love with those soulful deep voices and finally gave up my antipathy towards country music for good.
Austin, however, isn’t all about country music, quite the contrary. Austin is a friend to just about every type of music out there. South by Southwest (SXSW for short) is a music festival of epic proportions that happens there every March. Having listened to a download of singles from thousands of performers from 2008 and 2009 SXSW (Thank you Justin!), I was dying to make it to this year’s event. Our timing was off by about 2 weeks but we did get to spend a very relaxed Saturday evening strolling up and down 6th Avenue and Red River Street. Sure enough, there was music streaming live out of nearly every bar. Something vital is lost when music is recorded in a studio. CD’s can’t relay the grimacing and grinning faces of the musicians as they coax ever more intoxicating and heady tunes out of their instruments. I’ll never forget the mandolin player for Jackstraw playing so fast that his hands became invisible. You’ll never get that from a CD. The audience drives the musicians to give it their all, sweat, blood, and tears. And when the set is over you can’t just walk up to the CD and tell the band how much they blew you away. One band we really enjoyed, by the name of The Trent Turner Band in Austin, was vaguely reminiscent of Stevie Ray Vaughan. The guitarist was wailing. The bassist was a man on fire. It was a hell of a show. Everyone was tapping their toes, but no one could dance because they were too busy staring, mouths agape, at the acrobatics onstage.

Jon fishing on the Colorado River (The one in Texas)

We only stayed one night in Austin because we were eager to meet up with our aforementioned Texan friends in Fort Worth, Texas. On the way, we spent one night on the Colorado River (the Texan one) and did some fishing and barbecuing. The fish were not biting but the river was beautiful with huge multicolored cliffs on one side and thousands of fossils in the stone river bank on the other side. We were amazed to see about 50 vultures going after the dead cow on the opposite bank.

BBQ Texas style

We were so impressed by the BBQ provided at the campground that we had to take a few pictures of it in case we decide to someday duplicate it. The BBQ had a special mechanism for ventilation that made it possible to cook at a very high heat while still allowing the wood to last a long time. There was an ash box that the ashes could be easily pushed into and the BBQ could also be used as a smoker. We made an unforgettable meal on that BBQ; pork chops, asparagus and cabbage in aluminum foil, and an onion stuffed with a couple of Serrano peppers and olive oil as well as some oven baked potatoes.

The next day, as I was taking a shower (one of life’s simple pleasures when living in a trailer), a thunderstorm started. I walked outside, headed for the trailer, and was suddenly drenched in a deluge of rain. I looked up just in time to see the lightning crack into the ground no more than 50 yards away. I jumped about 5 feet in the air. By the time I made it the short distance to the trailer, it was as if I had taken a second shower – in my clothes!

Dana - mixing up some venison sausage - Fort Worth, Texas

We headed to Fort Worth as soon as the rain let up and were beyond stoked to see our Texas buddies finally. All along this trip, we’ve been somewhat concerned about the road worthiness of ‘Ole Giddy up Go and were just crossing our fingers that it would make it to Texas. We had finally made it. True, we still wanted to make it home, but we now had a month’s leeway, before making our way up to Alaska, to purchase a new truck if need be.

We spent our 2nd night in Fort Worth at a sausage party – a sausage-making party that is. Cameron and his buddy Cameron had a whole mountain of elk, venison, and pork sausage to turn into sausage. Sarah, Margarite, Cameron, and Cameron, Mike, and I all took turns pushing the meat into the sausage grinder and holding the formed sausage as it came out of the grinder. As you can probably imagine, the innuendos were flying. Messy as it is, I thoroughly enjoy the sausage making process, particularly since Cameron let me season a couple of batches on my own. Sausage seasoning possibilities are endless: salt, crushed red pepper, coarse black pepper, garlic, cheese, fresh jalapenos, celery, meat marinade, Cajun seasoning, fresh cilantro...As we mixed up the sausage ingredients, we cooked little bits up on the stove and taste tested them. YUM!

Dana and Mike, stuffing sausages

Fortunately for us, the sun was shining on us in Fort Worth. Cameron told us that spring had just arrived the day we got there. Not long before we arrived, they had a foot of snow on the ground – much more than is typical in Texas. Apparently everyone was out making snowmen.

That's one hell of a long sausage!

Modern Art Museum - Forth Worth, Texas

Andy Warhol - Modern Art Museum - Forth Worth, Texas

Sara took us to the Modern Art Museum in Fort Worth. They were featuring the works of Andy Warhol. I've never been a big fan of his work but I was curious to see more than the famous soup cans to see why it was that he made so much money. It was there, in the quiet and serene, library-like atmosphere, that Jon belted out, for the benefit of all those around us "This stuff is CRAP! They made us pay five dollars to see this!" There were definitely some folks around us nodding their heads in agreement.

Apparently, Andy Warhol was able to turn art into a business by opening "The Factory". "To create his art, Warhol used silkscreens so that he could mass-produce images the way capitalist corporations mass produce consumer goods. In order to continue working the way he did, he assembled a menagerie of adult film performers, drag queens, socialites, drug addicts, musicians, and free-thinkers that became known as the Warhol Superstars, to help him. These "art-workers" helped him create his paintings, starred in his films, and basically developed the atmosphere that the Factory has become legendary for.(Wikipedia)"

green candy with plastic wrappers - Modern Art Museum - Fort Worth, Texas

Jackson Pollock, Modern Art Museum - Fort Worth, Texas

Moder Art Museum - Fort Worth, Texas

Cameron running for it after a great hit

Jon nearly got in a fight with a guy on the opposing team for yelling "stttttttrrrriiiiiiiiiiikkkkkkeeeeee!" when he struck out (playing softball!) because he apparently wanted the walk. The dude came running over with that look in his eyes, but luckily ended up walking away - tail firmly tucked between his legs.

modern art at Lola's Saloon - Fort Worth Texas

One night we went to “The Stockyards” to see Scott Copeland playing live at Lola’s Basement Bar. The Stockyards was once the location of Fort Worth’s functioning stockyards, but is now a strip with old western façade style bars and restaurants. Sara tells me that longhorn cattle are routinely driven down the middle of the street for the sake of the tourists. The place we went to, Lola’s, was a great bar for dancing to live music and the location of Scott Copeland’s weekly gig.

Copeland’s band put on a great show and nearly everyone was dancing. Copeland sang and played an acoustic guitar. The rest of the band was made up of a lead electric guitar (who also played fiddle), a bass guitarist, a harmonica player, a drummer, and a guy on the steel guitar. They played many of their own songs and a few covers. Copeland must have like Jon’s dancing moves because he threw him a free CD.

Another night, Sara made delicious tacos and homemade Bloody Mary’s for us at Margarite’s house and we hung out on the back porch around a fire telling stories and dirty jokes. Margarite has quite the repertoire of few dirty jokes, as well as a delicious banana pudding recipe (topped with Nilla wafers - I haven’t had anything like that in years!) Afterwards, Margarite showed me how to make some fancy leather and turquoise earrings for my newly pierced ears. I guess I didn’t mention before that my good buddy Hallie took me to the oldest piercing salon in the world (located in San Francisco) to get my ears pierced for the first time. It’s hard to be a gypsy if you can’t wear giant hoops in your ears.

Deer Camp - ready for wild pig hunting!

The next day we set out for some pig hunting. Cameron borrowed some assault rifles from his buddy Cameron to add to the arsenal. All in all we had at our disposal: two AR-15’s, a 25 ought 6, a 7mm Magnum, a 22, a .223 with a high power scope, and a .38 pistol. Our first hunting camp was 1200 acre property that Cameron leased along with about 6 other dudes. They called it the T3 Ranch. Jon and Cameron scattered deer corn near the hunting stands to attract the wild pigs. There were also several feeders, filled with deer corn, that were set to go off in the early morning and late evening. The wild sows can have up to 30 piglets a year and are a menace to anyone with property. They can gain 300 lbs in their first 5 years so they obviously have to eat a lot. They dig up fences and eat the roots of just about any plant, including trees. The Texas government did some fly-by shooting and killed about 50,000 wild pigs. So, assault rifles in hand, we were out to save the environment.

T3 Ranch

What convenience! Actually, I tried to use this once and it broke 5 seconds after sitting on it. Hey! It was old!

You get better accuracy if you smoke a pipe while aiming

Jon trying out the handgun

We did some target shooting to check out our rifles. Bailey, who isn’t afraid of lightning, fireworks, or shotguns, was not a fan of semi-automatic weapons or pistols, and decided to hightail it as soon as the shooting started. We found the poor dude sitting by the gate.

That night, Jon and I sat in the hunting stand for about 4 hours. I got bored and fell asleep. Jon had to pee into his beer can. He woke me up when he saw a herd of deer walking around near dusk. Just when it got too dark to shoot, Jon thought he saw a wild pig running across the open field. We had to head back to camp empty handed, but we did get to eat some of our freshly made sausage cooked over a campfire.

Our Arsenal

Bailey sitting next to a cow pie with arrows

We decided that pigs, being lazy by nature, wouldn’t be waking up at the crack of dawn, so we shouldn’t bother to either. After a long night’s sleep we spent several hours sneakily hiking all over the property. Cameron managed to startle a big herd of pigs, but they ran off before he got the chance to shoot them. We attempted to circle around them for another go, but unfortunately - no luck.

The Lone Star of Texas

We decided to head over to a new hunting camp that night, owned by a friend of Cameron’s. T3 Ranch consisted of 4 trailers, a firepit, and a portapotty. This hunting camp, on the other hand included a beautiful 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom house with a big porch and outbuildings. When Cameron opened the door to the garage, we were surprised to see a giant side-by-side ATV called a “Mule”, with seating for 4 – and a safari style bench seat with a padded rail for easier shooting from the vehicle. This baby was a kick in the pants to ride on and even more fun to drive. It also had a giant spotlight so we could drive around at night with our assault rifles spotlighting for pigs.

"The Mule"

Better watch out deer....

deer stand

The next night Sara and I shared a deer stand and Cameron and Jon shared another. We were hoping to have to full glory of spotting and shooting our own wild hogs. About 15 minutes after getting into our stand we heard shots fired off in the direction of Cam and Jon's stand. "Damn that was quick!" We kept our eyes peeled hoping to see a whole horde of wild hogs come tearing out of the briars in our direction....we saw nothing! Then about an hour later - more shots! No pigs! We saw deer, turkeys, tons of birds, but not a single pig! Right at dusk, we heard the guys start shooting and it sounded like a wild hog massacre for several minutes. We were more than a little disheartened - until we saw the two pigs they had shot! Jon's pig was a good eating size and Cameron's was over 300lb - and it smelled like hell! It had scars all over it and even open wounds from battles with other pigs. Jon had also shot another large boar that got away into the briars. We dragged our spoils home on "The Mule" and cooked up some fresh pork backstrap for supper.

Jon and the 300 lb wild hog!

Dana, Queenie, Jon, and the 300 lb wild hog

The next morning, we got up bright an early, not wanting to waste another second of golden pig hunting opportunity. This time, I wanted to sit in the deer stand that Jon and Cameron had been in, close to the Brazos river, where the pigs seemed to like to hang about. This time Jon sat with me. It was a beautiful sunrise, but no pigs were spotted.

Jon and Dana witing for pigs in the deer stand - early morning

We decided to stick around for one more eveing of exciting deer stand sitting. This time, Sara and I took the river deer stand. On our way to the deer stand, we spotted a armadillo in the briars. I was beyond excited for my first armadillo sighting. When I saw it, i thought "armored rat". The armadillo paid us no heed and Sara started telling me that they attack people with they feel threatened. I was trying to get as close a shot with the camera as possible, but that gave me pause. Then, it finally saw us and took off. We sat in the deer stand, amusing ourselves in anyway possible, playing cards, whispering to the guys on our walkie-talkies, aiming at deer, eating candy...still NO PIGS! Well better luck for Sara and I next time, I suppose. Still it was an experience of a lifetime and we are ever so grateful to Cam for taking us along on that adventure!

armadillo

Sara getting ready for a big one to come along

watching the feeder - hoping for a wild pig to come along

Better watch out pig...

Jon and Cameron with their harvests

Sara and I ended up using the pork-butt off of Jon's pig to make some delicious tamales. I'm feeling pretty confident about my tamale making skills now, thanks to Danielle and Sara's tutelage.

Cameron and Cameron fishing below the Possum Kingdom Lake Dam on the Brazos River

Dana - Theadfin Shad

If you've ever heard the song "Possum kingdom" by the Toadies (a Texan band), “Decide to walk with me/ around the lake tonight/ behind the boathouse/ I’ll show you my dark secrets…” You've probably wondered where the name came. I found out when we went fishing on the Brazos River, just below the Possum Kingdom Dam at Possum Kingdon Reservoir. Cameron, Cameron, and Jon caught about a hundred bass (sand bass and striped bass) in a few hours. Even I was catching sand bass on almost every cast. Bailey was highly entertained by trying to fish out the bass after I got them off of my hook. We kept a striper and a sand bass for dinner and, thanks to Cameron's advice, fried 'em up with some corn meal for fish tacos. They were delicious.

Cameron and Jon with a Bass Bonanza! (Stripers and Sand Bass)

Jon with his Striped bass

After our time in Texas, we spent three days of long driving to get to Reno for our friends Tad and Jill wedding. The panhandle of Texas was pretty flat and brown and ugly. Particularly the town of Lubbuck. Sara tells me that Lubbock is known for having the highest rate of syphilis per capita in the country and a hearty dose of AIDS as well. Additionally, there was an especially raunchy cow farm where the cows were all stuffed into a tiny fenced-off area and the smell was intense for miles. It seems that the California cows are indeed the happy cows. We also saw another town that consisted of only a cemetary, a big pile of tires, and a Baptist church. We took route 66 back to Reno. The drive from Las Vegas to Reno was desolately beautiful, but very difficult - with the gale force headwinds. Reno seems to be filled with the dregs of society.(thank goodness for "Reno 911!") . However, there is a beautiful river with green way on both sides, running through town. The City of Reno altered the river from it's natural state to include better river kayaking challenges. The drop-offs and and pools that were created turned out to be a favorite habitat for trout and there were dozens of people out fly-fishing for them in the middle of downtown Reno.

After the wedding, we drove another 2 days to get back home. We celebrated the last day of our trip with a re-creation of the delicious BBQ'ed pork meal and had a nice fire near the banks for of the Klamath River. On our way home, we discovered that Bailey had about 20 ticks on him (That luckily hadn't gotten stuck yet) and I had 3 on my clothing and one that had dug it's way into my side. I'm still checking the bite mark to make sure I don't have Lyme disease.

Now that we are back in good old Ridgefield, WA - we are back to our usual spring harvesting. In the last week since we've been back we slayed the razor clams, oysters, and mussels in Long Beach, WA. Then I spent most of a day smoking and canning them. Since it's my first time using a pressure cooker, I was pretty stoked that tye turned out good. Jon spent a couple of days in his drift boat fishing for spring chinook on the Columbia River. Luigi went with him one day and the weather was so stormy and nasty that they ended up huddled in a shelter on the beach for most of the day. I went out with him the next day and after waiting in the hog line for 4 hours or so, Jon got one on the line. I grabbed the net nearly lost the fish by snagging the net on everything in sight, but we managed to get the fish in the boat! Although we saved most of the fillets for Jon's sister's wedding, we ate the collars that night and it was absolutely heaven.

The trip came full circle after that because Flo and Nicole invited us out to White Salmon for another epic snowboarding trip with Kjersti and Joel! The powder was so deep that it was tiring and it snowed most of the day. I ended my day early by running into the only tree in sight for hundreds of yards, because I was not paying attention, and had to go put some ice on my ankle. Having so much fun can be hard on you!

So this marks the end of our blog - for now. Thanks again to everyone who read it and especially for all your great comments and emails. We recommend this trip to anyone, it's incredible how much fun and adventure there is to be had in our own backyard. The scenic landscape of America is not to be missed. I found it very surprising that so much of the country is wide open space. We only traversed a tiny strip of our country and were continually amazed by the diversity and surprises around every bend. Now go have your own gypsy adventure!

Post script - there seems to be no evidence of lyme disease.

Life is Grand

2010-02-21T22:23:00.000-08:00

Grandpappy taking Jon for a ride in the MG

I am sitting in the parking lot of a Travel Center of America squished in amongst about a dozen semi’s. We’re stuck here for the night because of a blizzard. We had been chasing the sun straight into “New Mexico – The Land of Enchantment” (Where do they come up with these names?), but were overtaken by the cold weather that has swept the nation. Strangely enough, I hear that my two hometowns – Portland and Sitka – are remarkably warm and sunny. It feels very bizarre to go from 80 degrees to snow in one day’s drive. A week ago, we looked at a newspaper weather map that showed Yuma and Southern California as the only warm places in the country and cold weather and snow everywhere else – even Florida!

We had to the leave our warm cozy nook in Yuma for the wintry chill of Northern Arizona because we were on a mission. Three missions in fact – or maybe even four.

He's a classy guy

Cholla Cactus

Seriously? They couldn't possibly get any more confusing than this!

This is how to landscape if you don't have any Rhododendrons

Mission #1: Pick up Danielle and Luigi in Albuquerque, (I dare you to close your eyes and try to spell that word) New Mexico on February 25th. Our buds decided to fly down and hitch a ride with us to Austin, Texas! We even get to celebrate Luigi’s birthday with him! (Sometimes my exclamation marks annoy even me)

Mission#2: Go see the Grand Canyon. Check!

Mission#3: Hike into Supai and Mooney Falls. Yeah Joel, we’re kind wishing that you hadn’t even told us about this one. Now I’ll just be dreaming about it for years to come.

Oh, and Mission #4: Obtain a French Press for Jon (WEIRD, right?!)

Yuma architecture

This is another way to landscape if you're lacking Rhododendrons

These are the bones of a Saguaro Cactus

Prickly Pear cactus

What to do when you're old: buy toys!

Well so far we are two for four, but we’re closing in on three for four. The Grand Canyon really is everything it’s made out to be…and more – a lot more. For sure – put it in your top 100. I’m super jealous of my buddy Kjersti for having RAFTED the Grand Canyon, but you don’t need a mule ride or a rafting trip to be blown-away jaw-dropped speechless when you see this giant hole in the earth. I feel extremely lucky to have been able to see it at all, because I went back to see it the next day, and it was completely obliterated from view by the snowstorm. For some odd reason, we decided to see the Grand Canyon when it was windy AND icy, and yes, you CAN fall off the cliff. The thing that really shocked me about the Grand Canyon was that it looks so fake…really. Look at our pictures. They look like Grand Canyon backdrops in a photography studio, and I swear on my grandpappy’s life pirate sword that they are real. You look at the straight line of the North Rim Mesa, and the haziness due to the 8 miles distance to the other side, and the seemingly endless contours and surface area and it really makes your mind believe that it’s an illusion, that it cannot be real. Then you get used to looking at it and you put away your camera and you mosey on down the path and the BAM! Holy bejesus! There’s another whole amazing gorgeous astounding supreme vista. It’s really difficult to take a bad picture of the Grand Canyon. Even when it was shrouded in snowfall, the cliff drops with blankets of perfect white snow and the most bonsai looking trees ever, well, then you take another bazillion pictures. The number of pictures that I have been putting on the blog lately is getting kind of ridiculous, and yet I can’t manage to pare them down to just a few favorites. Especially the ones of Bailey…what a ham, that guy. He’s so good at posing. You just call out his name and he looks at you with a big cheesy grin and a giant pink tongue. If I don’t quit rambling I’m going to run the risk of boring you to tears.

Pirate Party!

These guys handcrafted this pirate ship with working cannons (potato guns) specially for the party

One of Jon's new tattoos

My Grandpappy and a very scary looking pirate

Dana and Jon - gypsy pirates

Grandpappy the Pirate

We set out to accomplish Mission #3, which was going to be even radder than the Grand Canyon. (Spell check doesn’t agree with radder as a word but it absolutely IS the right word in this context). Yes, so rad in fact, that “paradise” was used to describe it. We were headed for Mooney Falls near the Havasupai Indian Reservation town on Supai. To get to Supai, you can take a horse, a helicopter, or your own two feet. Feet were the only option on a budget. Unfortunately the hike to the falls is 10.5 miles each way on fairly steep and partially sandy terrain. This would have been a breeze as a 3 day trip, hike down, play in the falls (turquoise water, double falls, lush foliage, canyon walls that defy imagination), and then return on the third day. Hindsight really rubbed it in this time, because I had told myself there would be no need for back packing gear on this trip. Jon is not into backpacking, and we have a whole dang 5th wheel as a backpack, why pare down even more? You can bet Jon wasn’t too keen on a 21 mile day hike, even when I read in an Arizona tourist magazine that the hike was only 8 miles each way.

Well, Jon must really love me because he was willing to make it happen and feel the burn. So we headed out a dirt road (take a hint, when the road is marked with two dashed lines – it either means trouble or awesome – it’s hard not to be curious about the awesome). After an hour of driving straight into the featureless desert, we ended up driving down the driveway of a ranch house. I hop out to ask for directions because we must have taken a wrong turn. The dude (and I do mean dude) at the ranch was a genuine cowboy. Spurs, hat, buckle, boots, the whole nine yards, with a real nice spread in the Redlands. He tells us it should be a crime to publish maps like the one we have, to make it look like there is only one road. There are hundreds of roads, he says. He drew us a nice little map, with directions to go left of the Y at the pipeline and right on the road after the weaning pen. We thanked him and drove up the road until we were pretty sure that trailer would get stuck if we didn’t pull over. We spent the night in the desert and packed bunch of snacks for our giant hike. Jon actually packed rain clothes in case he had to spend the night on the ground (The things I put this guy through!) We left the trailer behind and drove more than an hour further into the desert until our gas gauge had nearly reached the point of no return. We still hadn’t found the right turnoff. We had to turn around (sadly on my part, inwardly gleeful on Jon’s part). In the end, we discovered that Joel was right about the 21 miles round trip, rather than 16 miles. We also read the warnings that it was “NOT MEANT TO BE A DAY HIKE” and I had to give up my dream of paradise. Ah…who am I kidding, I’m waking up in paradise every single day. For instance, even here, packed in with the semi’s, I spent a wonderfully relaxing evening of monopoly and homemade fried chicken with Jon in our cozy little cabin on wheels. Plus, I can stay up all night because even though it’s Monday tomorrow, because I’m not going to work in the morning. Ok, that was cruel. I only said that because I wish everyone would try out a little gypsy adventure of their own.

More of Jon's tattoos

The littlest pirate

Mission #4: Ever since our stop in Morro Bay with Jessica and Amanda, Jon has been wishing for a French Press. Strange, since he’s never been one for coffee, but who can blame him? Especially, when Jessica introduced him to Stumptown coffee. Mmmm. We were at a Wal-Mart in Phoenix Arizona, and the cashier asked us if we found everything ok. “No, actually we couldn’t find a dictionary or a French press” I say. “What’s a French press?” she said. I described it for her and she said “boy, I don’t know where you could find one of those”. We needed the dictionary for our Scrabble games (contesting words is difficult without a firm authority). Next door to Wal-Mart was Office Max. They didn’t have a dictionary either. The helpful guy with all the electronic gizmos attached to his ears and belt asked me “is there anything else I can help you find?” “Not unless you have a French press” I said. “What’s that?” “Never mind”, “Cause we can order it!” The French press grail was finally uncovered at a Starbucks (duh!) This morning, we did a crossword while sipping Jon’s delicious French pressed Folgers coffee. (Just kidding)

The King and Queen of Pirates

Like I said, classy dude

Preparing for sandrailing

Jon and my cousin Randy

We’ve been really impressed by Arizona. I didn’t expect there to be so much diversity in the terrain. It was also a nice surprise to discover how genuinely nice the people are here. They seem to have a very laid-back attitude. We spent one night camped in the mountains north of Phoenix. Jon and I stumbled upon a homestead community on an old dirt road in a beautiful woodland haven. We camped out near a creek and decided to walk up it. We have continued our mushroom search, even though they seem to have dropped off after we left the California coast. We were hoping that with all the unprecedented rain in the desert, there might be a giant mushroom bloom. If there was, we missed it. Along the creek banks, we found evidence of a mining claim, a homeless shelter, and a sweat lodge. We also briefly lost Dana, but Bailey found her. He’s pretty good with that sniffer.

Sandrailing is also rad - especially when I get to drive...

Thanks Uncle Ed and Randy!

Petroglyphs. It was difficult to tell the real ones from all of the recent graffiti. I guess that petroglyphs are essentially graffiti.

Some RV neighbors showing their pirate flag

Arizona sunsets are beautiful

Remains of a sweat lodge

Mining claim

On our way to pick up Danielle and Luigi, we’ve been travelling along the historic Route 66. There are about a million places to acquire “curios, souvenirs, antiques, native crafts, and clean bathrooms”. There are also about a dozen geodesic domes and even more giant colorful dinosaurs, along with interspersed giant arrows, giant Flintstones, and giant Indians. I have to admit that I have a weakness for souvenir shops. It’s embarrassing, but I’ve learned to accept it like my weakness for trashy magazines (People, US Weekly – Jon is always having to drag me away from the news stands at the cash register when I get too engrossed in the latest scandal – I can’t believe I’m admitting to this) and my new weakness for the Twilight series (yes, I read the next one). It’s all brain candy. The good thing is that, so far, I have only purchased one item at a souvenir shop, and it was our mushroom field guide book.

Bailey fetching

Coyote

Redlands

Bailey spots Jon in the distance

herd of wild pronghorn antelope

Kjersti check it out! Even Arizona turned out for Ragnar.

On a side note, I had a long conversation with my brother this morning and learned that he and our dad were nearly attacked by a 10 ft long Bronze Whaler shark a month ago. Alex tells me that while spearfishing in New Zealand with our Dad, he saw a 10 foot shark and bolted for the nearest island. He yelled for dad to get out of the water. Dad thought it unlikely that they would see the shark again, and although they were both towing their catch bags full of dead fish, decided they could head for shore. You can bet they dropped the bags in a hurry when the saw the Bronze Whaler again. To my great relief, they made it to shore unharmed. My dad saw another large shark while snorkeling again just recently.

Bailey looks scared of the Grand Canyon

Lucky we weren't on the path when this rockfall happeened

Trail down into the canyon

Doesn't it look fake?

Mules for riding into the canyon

This fire made my cheeks rosy - or maybe it was the Prickly Pear Margarita

Grand Canyon in the winter

Hopi Historical House

Purine Factory. Smelled like dog food for a 1/2 mile radius. Bailey seemed to enjoy it, Jon and Dana did not.

"Air Cactus" in a Cholla cactus core - Thanks Bevie!

Jon fixed our cupboards to prevent pea spillage

New Sport - Dog Skiing

Sandrailing!

Dana the Anthropologist

2010-02-10T12:01:00.000-08:00

Yuma, Arizona

Joshua Tree National Park is famous for Joshua Trees (of course) and big piles of rounded rocks. This type of terrain is so completely foreign to anything I have ever seen before that I am utterly mystified. I find myself scouring roadside bookshelves for identification books on cacti and the medicinal properties of desert plants. Afterall, now that we can count ourselves among the millions of uninsured Americans, prickly pears could be part of our preventitive health care plan!

Unfortunately, Joshua Tree was not all that dog-friendly (contrary to their "Dogs are Welcome" sign). Bailey had to be on a short leash at all times, never to be left in the trailer, and never to be on trails (even with a leash). The rules of the park also included very strict generator hours of 7-9am, noon to 2pm, and 5-7pm only. We decided that rather than skipping hiking altogether, we would, in typical Jon fashion, take the untrodden desert path. We were hoping to stumble upon an oasis or two. We managed to find an abandoned mine, an oasis, and a number of new cacti for me to puzzle over. As sunset rolled in over the desert, I questioned whether it would be a good time to return home. "We have to find the other oasis!", says Jon. Well, considering my night vision is very poor and I'm not fond of tripping over the so-called "Teddy-Bear Cholla Cactus" (pronounced choy-ya), a cactus that has more prickers than anything else, I insisted that we head home.

The desert is a great place to try to identify animal tracks and skat, since the tracks are generally in sand and may last for years and years. So far, we are pretty sure we've seen signs of lizards bunny rabbits, jack rabbits, beetles, side winders, various rodents, ground squirrels, and possibly coyotes and Big Horned Sheep. Even a person like me can't get lost when you can see for miles and miles out in the distance, or track yourself back home.

Jon and I are considering buying a little dirt bike because there is unlimited opportunity to ride. You see folks riding down the road and then tearing off into the desert wherever they please for a nice little joyride. Seems as though most everyone has a quad, motorcycle, sandrail, Jeep, or some other souped-up 4-bying machine. We're also starting to see a lot more golf carts.

In Blythe California, we were parked at an Ace Hardware. I was reading a book waiting for Jon. A very portly gentleman sidles up to the truck and says to me "Well you're a long ways away from home". Living in Portland and walking past throngs of homeless and otherwise sketchy looking folks each day has trained me in the art of avoidance of strangers. However, I have learned that friendly locals are the best source of information while on the road. So 'Ole Kelly and I get to talking and next thing you know, he turned us on to a most fabulous camping spot right next to the Colorado River where you can camp for free, unmolested, for 14 days. Then as long as you move 30ft or so, you can camp another 14 days for free. Then he went on to tell me which kind of fish were biting (bass and crappies in the backwater and flathead catfish in the Colorado) and what they were biting on (worms for the bass and live bass for the catfish). He also gave directions to the laundromat where worms could be purchased (since you can't dig your own in the desert) By the time Kelly was finished, Jon had joined in the conversation and was ready to invite Kelly to join us at our campfire for a beer. Kelly said he could jump on his quad right from his house and get there in a couple of minutes.

We ended up BBQ'ing a huge pile of beef ribs that night. I started out eating them with dainty bites until Jon came over and planted a big BBQy smooch on me and then I went for it whole hog, "taking it to the face" (as Jay would say), gnawing and ripping at tendons like Bailey, and generally making a disgusting pig out of my self. What a delicious meal!

Date Farm

Jon fishing for Bass and Catfish

Bailey on his bed - the fifth-wheel couch, what a spoiled dog!

My Grandparent's Backyard

One of the downfalls (pun intended) of trailer living

Need your teeth cleaned? Ask Jesus!

The line to get out of Mexico

This dog is for sale

Tequila Samples at the liquor store in Mexico

They take money very seriously in Mexico

This kid worked for about 30 min on this woman's shoes for $1 US. Check out the

the advertisement for an automatic shoe polisher on the inside of his kit.

Chili pepper flakes on my Bloody Mary in Mexico

Need a beer holster Cowboy?

These guys are making dentures

Coke is good for babies

These guys are pharmacists in Mexico

Flea Market and Tacky Kitsch Central, Quartzite Mexico

We went bass fishing the next morning. Jon was checking out a hole when he saw "a giant one swimming by". We dropped in our bobbers and sure enough, started getting bites right off the bat. I got two and Jon got five. Jon says (and I agree) that "pound for pound, bass are the best fighters around". They were jumping out of the water and tearing away from us the whole time. I have to say that I count this among the very few thrilling fishing trips that I have had.

Then that night, I asked Jon if he would like me to cut his hair. He says "yes, if you can cut it while I sit in a lawn chair and fish for catfish". I told him that he better not be jumping out of his chair every few minutes and he said "oh no, it takes hours for catfish to bite". So I get about halfway through his haircut when he hollers and I drop the scissors and he falls over in his enthusiasm to grab the rod. Turns out he had a lovely 6 pound flathead catfish on. We decided to let him go, since we already had more bass than we could eat. You'll notice that Jon's hair has been looking extremely well kept lately.

Jon and his beauty of a Flathead Catfish

I had a bit of a snafu making french bread, turns out that you have to read EVERY single sentence of the 4 paragraghs of steps involved and that whole wheat bread has to rise 3 times and french bread has to rise twice. Anyways, we ate some really delicious bass sandwiches on freshly baked bread

My 2nd (successful) attempt at homemade bread

Our Bass Bonanza

Secret Bass Hole

Jon cooking ribs on the BBQ for dinner

Sunset on the Colorado River

Our sweet camping spot on the Colorado River

Sunrise in Joshua Tree National Park

Sunset in Joshua Tree National Park

Bailey, The Intrepid Explorer

Jon and Bailey on top of Mammoth Mountain

Ocatillo Cactus at sunset

Jon, the Intrepid Explorer

Split rock at Joshua Tree National Park

Mine at Joshua Tree National Park

Abandoned Mine

Dana, Joshua Tree National Park

Oasis in Joshua Tree National Park

Ocatillo Cactus up close

Inside of a Cholla Cactus

Teddy Bear Cholla Cactus

Joshua Tree Cacti

California Barrel Cactus

Yucca and Prickly Pear Cactus

Bailey's trying to follow Jon, but isn't sure he can make it up the rock

Shoe Tree (Palo Verde)

Bailey's Bass Phobia

We are now in Yuma and I feel like I am an anthropologist, studying a whole new culture. I used to scoff at snowbirds and felt that back packing was the only true form of camping. That is until I became one of them. We came to visit my granpappy and his sweet little girlfriend Bevie. We've been whooping it up with them for half a week now, and already Jon is checking out real estate. Just try to imagine your life if you had all the time in the world to play and party and hang out with all your beast friends, at least until you heart craps out or your knees fail to function. At least then you can still sit around swapping tall tales and drinking beers in the hot hot Arizona winters. Or hop in your shiny new sand rail and head out into the desert with your sweetheart for the day. All the women are losing their husbands and finding new ones. (The odds are pretty sweet for the old dudes). If you get bored of Yuma, you can hop over to Mexico and purchase your cheap drugs (add that to Jon and Dana's gypsy health care plan), be serenaded by live music everywhere you go, and sweet-talked into buying all sorts of baubles and trinkets. If you like bartering, you can talk 'em down from $160 for turquoise jewlery to $20. Amazing how the price drops when you barter like Jon...

"Very special price for you sir, originally $60, I give it to you for $40"

Jon says "how about $20?"

"these sunglasses have real glass! very clear! ok, you take them for $30, special price for you"

Jon says "how about $18?"

Everyone is friendly here, everyone waves, everyone loves our giant beast of a dog, and has something interesting to point us in the direction of. I've been walking the dog 3 times in "the wash", a dry river bed, and have met a variety of interesting folks from all over the world. One fellow, Marvin is from Sauvies Island (a few miles from my house in Portland). My new walking buddy, Angelique, is from the Netherlands. Everyone's husband is named Jon, so I fit right in. I spent a wonderful superbowl sunday with 50 or so of my grandparents friends and couldn't breathe because I was laughing so hard at all the good stories coming out of the "hens corner". Everyone is looking forward to my grandparents "Pirate Party" on Valentines Day.

Grandpappy and Bevie took us to Martinez Lake for some fishing and cocktails. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful day. We checked out the local animal reserve and the parachuter dropping out of a plane in the Army proving grounds. Bevie treated us to a delicious date shake, made with the fresh dates from the nearby farm (so delicious).

All in all, I'm pretty convinced that the 'ole fogies have got things pretty well figured out. Either that or Jon and I do :)

Busch Light Boxes Make Green Flames

2010-02-03T11:17:00.000-08:00

Sunset in the Mojave Desert

Bailey - Kelso Dunes Mojave Desert

I love this picture - Bailey is SO zen

The next few pictures are a 360 view from the top of the Kelso Dunes in the Mojave Desert

Scroll through them quickly to get the real-time effect

I know there's a lot of pictures of Bailey here but look how regal he is!

The Kelso Sand Dunes in the Mojave Desert

These roads go on for ever. In a straight line even! Quite a dramatic change from the coast.

Red Hot sausages with chanterelles and onions. Yumm.

"Camp" in the desert

Near Zabriskie Point - Death Valley

Dana at Zabriskie Point - Death Valley

Breathtaking Views

Date Farm in Death Valley

Remains of Borax Mine in Death Valley

Borax in Death Valley

The Prowler and 'Ole Giddyup-Go in Death Valley

Jon at Mosaic Canyon - Death Valley

Marble smooth walls polished by occasional flooding

Conglomerates make for some interesting textures

Rock Cairn in Mosaic Canyon - Death Valley

This is what waterfalls look like in Death Valley

A little ironic with all this beautiful scenery around

Barrel Cactus

Salt - Lots of it!

4-bying time!

Bakersfield California

View from the truck

My you look delicious...

Old farmhouses always look so desolate

When nuclear warfare or global warming or any other worldwide event eradicates life as we know it on the planet, I know that I will be perfectly fine. I know this because my husband can fix anything and find food in the most unlikely of places.

We were heading out of San Francisco on the San Mateo Bridge when Jon belts out a litany of cusswords that even my 'Ole Granpappy wouldn't say. Turns out, one of our wheels broke off. Yeah, not just the tire or anything simple like that - a whole entire wheel came flying off the trailer. Luckily we recovered the missing wheel and were able to hobble our giant caravan the rest of the way into San Mateo. We recieved discouraging news (and quotes up to $450) from mechanics at several shops. In the end, Jon found the parts and fixed it all by himself for under $100. Brilliant! - and we were on our way once more...

Many things have surprised me about this trip. Jon's complete knack for self-sufficiency, my willingness to live in this camper forever, the wide variety of meals that can be made with hot dogs, and last, but not least, that this country is so incredibly beautiful...and ugly. For the most part I have preferred overseas travel to nearby locations in the U.S. I couldn't imagine the fantastic diversity, giant wildernesses, and wide open spaces that are less than a day's drive from home. This last week has been an experience in contrast. We started out on the beautiful coastline between Frisco and L.A. The area north of San Luis Obispo is the most gorgeous coast I've seen so far. Then we hopped over the mountains and headed into the desert. Feels like we made a trip to the moon.

Before I get too far ahead of myself, let me tell you about Monterey. There seemed to be no end to the homeless folks in Monterey. Signs were posted up everywhere announcing a $200 fine for sleeping in your car overnight in California. I was chatting with a woman while checking out a pelican in a parking lot. With a start, I realized that she was standing next to her home (a van) complete with 3 cats. She said she was homeless because of her cats. She went on to say she had a real affinity for animals close to extinction. I thought maybe she was referring to the pelican, but she was pointing at her cats. While trying to stifle my laughter, I asked if she knew of a good place to park for the night in a fifth wheel. She hooked us up with 3 great hassle-free locations. That night we were surrounded by no less than 5 other "gypsies" in the Home Depot parking lot.

We had to check out the aquuarium in Monterey and decided it was well deserving of it's reputation. The blank stares on the animals in zoos always make me feel uneasy and depressed. Somehow aquariums give me the opposite feeling. Staring at fish swimming back and forth puts me in a zen-like state for hours. We didn't get out of there for about 5 hours.

We then we made our way further down the coast and just happened to see an elephant seal on the side of the highway. Well, I didn't - Jon did. Jon's hawk eyes pick up everything, while I see the world through a horse's blinders. We pulled over and walked down to the beach where we found...elephant seals! Hundreds of them, just lounging, squawking at eachother, fighting over babes, dusting themselves with sand, and generally looking like they had not a care in the world - not even us. We were hoping to watch the males get in a fight. These suckers were larger than a horse. There was plenty of posturing but the only sign off violence was the giant gashes and teeth marks on each of the males. Remarkably, each one of the females had a baby she was nursing at her side.

As we drive down coast, it occurs to me that everything about the coast has changed. The changes happen so subtly over the miles that you don't realize it until suddenly, everything is different; the trees, the grass, the animals, even the coast line. There's no denying the magic of Oregon's coastlines, but you can see there's a reason why so many people live in California. And yet, nearly our whole journey has been through towns with less than 500 people and no cell phone reception. The coast has felt pretty empty and wild.

Next stop was the Hearst Castle. For those of you unfamiliar with William Randolf Hearst, the publishing magnate and politician; Hearst Castle is one of dozens of homes owned by Hearst. According to our tour guide (who seemed to be Hearst's biggest fan) he was a humanitarian opposed to Mussolini, Hitler, and the Klu-Klux-Klan even when they were in favor in America. The castle rivalled Versailles in its outrageous displays of spanish, roman, and mediterranean art. Sculptures and tapestries abounded and Hearst obviously had more money than he knew what to do with. Hearst Castle once boasted the largest privately owned zoo in the U.S., complete with lions, tigers, bears, zebras, and various species of antelope. Zebras still roam the 500 sq. miles of property and 50 miles of coastline. Citizen Kane and The Great Gatsby were both written wbout Hearst. Though his father was quite wealthy and could have easily set Hearst up with a multi-million dollar business, Hearst was determined to make a living in newspapers. His father purchased The San Francisco Chronicle for Hearst, which at the time was hemorraging money. Hearst was able to turn it around and become one of the wealthiest men that the world has ever seen.

I love any town with commercial fishing boats. This is Morro Bay California

I decided to call up my friend Jessica in Morro Bay and drop by for a visit. Lucky for us it was Jessica's birthday that very day! Jessica and her daughter Amanda are both taking karate - Amanda is a fifth level red belt (only one belt away from a black belt!). Jessica was kind enough to take me along for her karate lesson, where I learned flying side kicks, summersaults, parries, and many other things - KIIIIYAHHHH!!!!! Most of the class was made up of adolescent boys and the best part was when the sensei gave two of the rowdiest a pair of nerf bats and told them to go to town on each other.

Amanda, Jon, and I had some some extremely competitive bouts of Wii Sports and I'm pleased to say that the karate class helped out my boxing immensely.

Amanda is in 4H and has her own goat, Bella, the most adorable, frolicking, jumping up on piles of wood little goat ever! She let us come with her to feed and train it. Amanda and Bella got first and second place in two different categories at their last fair! Next year they are going to start milking Bella. I am SOO jealous.

Jessica and Amanda also took us for a great little kayak trip where we headed over to a huge sand spit to check out the surfers on a gorgeous sunny day. All in all, it seems that Jessica has found and amazingly chill town to settle down in. We're putting Morro Bay on our list.

Nothing like the good cheap thrills of standing next to giant surf coming over a jetty

Surfing AND Commercial fishing? Now we're definitely hooked on Morro Bay

Morro Bay Harbor - This is where we did some kayaking

"The Rock" - Morro Bay, California

Indoor Swimming Pool at Hearst Castle

This is gold inlaid tile

Ceiling at Hearst Castle

Dining Room at Hearst Castle

One of the many tapestries at Hearst Castle

One of the sitting rooms at Hearst Castle

Dana at Hearst Castle

Outdoor swimming pool at Hearst Castle

Hearst Castle

Ahhh...elephant seals are adorable

at first we thought they were driftwood...

Someone built these chairs for us

This mushroom is called a Yellow Stainer for the bright yellow spot

that shows up when you rub it

Someone had a killer house on the river in the valley that this bridge passes over -

with an overlook flooded by pelicans

Monterey Bay - famous for...tourists

and an aquarium

How can there be animals that look this amazing? (Sea Dragon)

Pictures don't do it justice (Sea Dragon)

Sea Anenomes

I Know! Wow!

Jon in Monterey Bay

One of our gypsy neighbors in the Home Depot Parking Lot

These are the biggest pickles I have ever seen

This pelican looks lost

So yeah...our wheel fell off on the San Mateo Bridge on our way out of San Francisco.

We've been out in the desert for the last few days; Death Valley, The Mojave Desert, and now Joshua Tree. I'm currently sitting in a cafe in Twenty Nine Palms, a town that seems to exist only to provide a good variety of "Military Hair Cuts" and tattoo parlors for the nearby Marine base. I've always been curious about this place. I have a good buddy named Rob who was stationed here. Many of his stories begin with "This one time in Vegas..." or "this one time in Thailand..."

Desert towns are bizzarre. They pop up out of nowhere - after driving miles without seeing anything - and you ask yourself, why on earth they would choose this location to settle. Apparently, people were able to make a bundle off of the naturally occuring Borax, chlorine, and salt that exist out here. Nowadays, many of the houses are boarded up and abandoned. The ghost towns have a mildly depressing feeling to them. We did stumble upon pyramids for sale and one little town that boasted an incredible museum with actual Mammoth bones!

I love the desert for the fact that you can pull off the road into the creosote bushes and park your fifth wheel for the night, let your dog run wild, watch the sun paint beautiful colors on the landscape as the sets, and see the stars in all directions.

Big City Na Na

2010-01-23T10:49:00.000-08:00

Alcatraz

Bay Bridge - San Francisco

After miles and miles of towns ranging from 50 to 1000 people, we have finally landed in the heart of San Francisco. Big city though it may be, we have a few skilled tour guides for our foray into the concrete jungle. First stop - Aunt Jeanne and Uncle Milt's house in Walnut Creek. When you think of Jon and Dana rolling up in a fifth wheel RV with a giant black dog, the image that you conjure up should be something like this picture of Cousin Eddie from National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

We're pretty classy that way. Jeanne and Milt have showered us (literally - and oh the simple pleasures of a hot shower) with abundant hospitality. Frisco is definitely Milt's town - having grown up right on the dock of the bay with all all the Italian kids and celebrities like Houdini living right up the street. He gave us a tour of the city that proved even a subaru can be in the grand prix.

Milt and Jeanne's house in Walnut Creek is located just a 5 min walk from an enourmous reserve with all kinds of wildlife. Raccoons, deer, hordes of waild tukeys, possums, skunks, egrets, and more make their way into backyards regularly. The area is a slice of paradise in the big city. I ran for two hours and never crossed my same path. Bailey was hot on the trail of every ground squirrel in the vicinity. I actually lost him for the first time since he was a puppy. I realized that he had gotten confused on the return trip and headed back the way we had come from. I followed his giant paw prints in the mud all the way (2 miles) back to the house (smart dog!) He probably thought I was lost!

I've been loving up on the sourdough bread here - it's not just a clever marketing ploy! The bread has this extra dimension of heartiness and chewyness that makes all other bread pale in comparison. I'm currently on the hunt for a sourdough starter ("baby") that I can use to make my own sourgdough bread. I'm not saying that I will come anywhere near to competing with the masters, but my first ever from-scratch whole wheat loaves turned out well enough that I am determined to try.

I have also been sprouting mung beans lately. We actually have a sort of "garden" in the back of the passenger seat of the pick-up, hanging in th mesh compartment. It started off with just a jar of sprouts (maintenance on sprouts is pretty hard-core), but then a red-wood seedling was added, and finally a bunch of wildflowers. We have now placed the red-woods in the capable hands of Hallie in San Fran, and better yet, her roomate who specializes in the care of orchids. The mighty seedling would surely have perished in our hands.

I may have already mentioned that I've read more books in the last two months than in the last two years. I'm embarrassed to admit that I read Twilight and enjoyed it. I'm currently reading Pride and Prejudice and Zombies - a very interesting contrast. I have to highly recommend The Red Tent, The Art of Racing in The Rain, and A Girl's Guide to Hunting and Fishing (which, though a good read, unfortunately contains no hunting and fishing tips)

On the way down the coast, we experienced some very heavy storms. Shortly after setting down the landing gear at a State Park, a park ranger came along to inform us that we may want to move camp because many of the trees were likely to fall that night. We continued on down the road to to a spot next to the beach to watch the storm roll in (maybe not the nest decision we ever made). Jon cleverly pointed us directly into the wind. Otherwise, we may have tipped over in the gale force winds. We didn't really sleep that night. Just lay there stiffly, counting the seconds between lightning and thunder and wincing when the count reduced to less than a mile away. The rain was pounding all night, and at one point, Jon got up to check outside. He burst back in with the news that there was a river flowing under us. At this point it was impossible to leave because if we didn't blow over on the beach, we surely would have on the cliffs of the road above. Somehow we survived the night, at which point, a ranger came by to tell us we should leave before the abnormally high tide rolled in. We were astonished to find large piles of heavy driftwood that had washed up along our tires that night.

The storm continued and we stopped along the road to check out the breakers. Fifteen foot waves (that's more than 2 Dana's tall!) were crashing into the shoreand spraying us at 40 feet above sea level! You could understand, watching all that power, how the myriads of fantastic geologic formations along the coast could have come to be.

As we were nearing San Francisco, we passed through several flooded zones, up to 18" on the roads. Grandpappy, down in Yuma Arizona, called to check and make sure I survived the big storm. Thankfully, it was just one more adventure on the road.

Flooding

Hwy 1. California

My wonderful friend Hallie had us over at her flat in Frisco. Hallie has been a wonderful hostess as well with a night out on the town, some karaoke, and late-night Boggle . Hallie lives on a hill that, while innoculously named 22nd st, rivals the Matterhorn in steepness. Everyone was parked sideways on the hill and I seriously thought that the truck would tip over and roll down the hill. You had to hold on when you opened the truck door, so that it's weight didn't drag you out. We watched people trying to walk up the hill and every single biker got off and walked. Hallie said she once dropped her cell phone, while on her way to her car, and it slid all the way down the hill. Wearing high heels on the hill was nearly impossible, but if you were pointed uphill in while wearing high heels, your toes would be comfortably at the same level as your heels. As Hallie's mom was leaving, her car wouldn't start because the gas gauge was registering empty, even at a quarter full, because of the extreme angle.

Mushroom Hunting

2010-01-17T14:50:00.000-08:00

Humbolt county has treated us to an amazing display of it's ginormous redwoods and we have been thoroughly impressed. We actually got semi-lost strolling off-trail in the redwood park near Humboldt State University. Off-trail hiking is what Jon likes to call "adventuring" and it's the only way I have ever been able to convince him to go hiking. In this instance, we stumbled upon an actual cave that had been dug by a human into the hillside and had only game trails leading up to it.

We were so pleased to feel the sun's warmth in Arcata, that we spent half a day in the wildlife reserve sitting in lawnchairs painting (me) and drinking beers (Jon).

We continued down to the Lost Coast and the magical little town of Petrolia. The road to Petrolia went over a pass that was only 15 miles, but took us an hour and a half to cross. The roads were in excess of 15% grade and nearly every turn was a hairpin. On the way up, we crawled at a grueling 5-10 miles per hour - whispering sweet encouraging words to 'Ole Giddyup Go the whole way. The way down was actually worse because the brakes were in charge of stopping 12,000 lbs of truck, fifth wheel, and cargo with the same steep declines and ridiculously tight turns. We had to stop twice because the brakes were fading. Our only solace was that it was too dark to see the harrowingly steep cliffs on the side. Additionally, our slow-going meant that we ran out of gas much sooner and we're sure if we'd make it to more gas before it was too late. Jon has proven himself to be a very skilled driver. Coincidentally, the forest we were driving through is where Jurrasic Park was filmed.

We had to stay extra days in Petrolia because #1 everyone waved at us, #2 our campsite cost only $8/night, at the beach, with plenty of fresh water, #3 pelicans, seals, mussels and Lost Coast adventing at our doorstep, #4 goat farms, #5 "Dinner and Cabaret" at the local Petrolia Community Center, #6 Salmon River, #7 Daffodils were already popping up. Suffice it to say, I was looking into real estate in Petrolia, until I found out that they have earthquakes everyday because it is located in the Mendocino Triple Junction, where three fault lines meet - most seismically active town in America.

Jon and I hiked to the lighthouse on the Lost Coast trail and managed to bring back a few gypsy treasures, a pot, a giant abalone shell, a dive belt, and a pile of mussels. You know you've eaten a lot of mussels when you start eating them on chips with hummus or making them into pate (both delicious).

The beach also afforded us the opportunity to stretch out on a blanket and check out the glorious stars.

As a side note, I got word that someone is scamming my craigslist add for our house rental. Apparently, the scammer, who claims to be working in Africa, has been asking potential renters to send him $700 deposit and first month's rent for 9906 N. Ivanhoe St., claiming free firewood and a pool table is included, and that he will send a key. Not sure why anyone would be stupid enough to do this.

Turkey Tail

For those of you, unaware that Jon and I are avid mushroom hunters, one look at our 6 mason jars filled with dried chanterelles from this last fall's harvest will clue you in. Mushroom tip #1 Chanterelles aren't very good when dried - they are remeniscent of cup 'o noodles soup.

Recently we scored on the world renowned mushroom field guide All that the Rain Promises and More... (see cover below). This handy dandy field guide is written by the author of Mushrooms Demystified, a veritable bible of all things mushroom. We've been searching in redwoods, firs, and pines, hoping to stumble upon a giant motherlode of King Boletes, or Matsutakes. Instead, the only thing edible that we've found is the Toothed Jelly Fungus and the Fluted Black Elfin Saddle. Mushroom tip #2. Toothed Jelly Fungus is delicious mixed with cream and honey, otherwise, not tasty. Mushroom tip #3. Don't believe Jon simply when he says a mushroom is edible, even if he puts it in his mouth. In our searches, we have come across many other lovely types of mushrooms and even put some of our own names to them, if we can't find them in the guide. My favorite so far is the Ladyfoot Damsel Slipper - see if you can tell which one that is!

Fluted Black Elfin Saddle

We acquired something else while in the redwood forest...tics! Lots of them on Bailey, two on Jon so far, none on Dana...yet....ewww! Check out the video below...

Poaching Campsites

2010-01-10T11:25:00.000-08:00

definition:

poaching campsites: To "squat" or station one's travelling caravan on a previously unoccupied piece of property, after the obligatory check for "no camping" or "day use only" signs. This property may be a pull-off on the side of the road or the bank of a beautiful river with, miraculously, access for a 5th wheel. Either way it cuts out the pricey, rule-laden, and non-dog-friendly RV park middlemen.

We're not quite out of Oregon (Brookings) and already it's balmy t-shirt weather. The foliage has changed substantially as we've headed down the one-oh-one and we're amazed by the amount of green deciduous trees. Surely it's not January - must be spring.

Our first poached campsite was near a beach AND an river where the old folks were out in force with their poking sticks. "What are you looking for?" - "aggats". Well, nice as aggats are, Jon managed to find mussels! Hords of them. We packed as many as we could fit in our hoodie front-pockets and hurried home to boil 'em up for a delicious seafood pasta dinner. Jon did a little surf-perch fishing and spotted some gigantic mussels that were about 8" long! We left them alone because the little ones are the tastiest.

Poaching campsites is a lot easier when you are self contained. We left Washington on Wednesday after Jon managed to fix all the leaks in our plumbing system and fine-tune the electrical system (complete with our whisper-quiet generator). We are missing hot water but not too much. We now have an operating stove, oven, refrigerator, freezer, sink, toilet, and lights. The microwave draws too much electricity but we're surviving without it . We're living on the cheap. I've had my chef's hat on, and I'm soon to put on my baker's hat for some home-made bread, although I'll have to get Jon to agree to letting me snuggle a sourdough baby on cold nights...

Unfortunately ol' Giddy-Up-Go (our '97 GMC) bit the dust and we had to get a new rig (see below)

(just kidding - see the video below for a tour of our camper)

We've become newly acquainted with the joys of Redbox and watched a movie for the first time on the trip - Public Enemies - pretty entertaining. Mostly we've been playing a lot of games and reading books. We're big fans of cribbage, scrabble, boggle. Add to your book list "Glass Castle"- never has a memoir put such a pleasant spin on the joys and adventure of homelessness, poverty, and hunger.

We've been on the quest for steelhead with zero success. I get bored after snagging my line and losing my lure twice in five minutes and opt for yoga on the river banks instead. Jon will never deter from his continuing mission - to explore strange new rivers, to seek out new fish, and new seafood, to boldly go where x-tra tuffs have never gone before. He is not even slowed by the gut-wrenching rib pain that started after our snowboarding adventure.

We did spend two nights in an actual state park on the ocean with cheap prices and long hot showers included. At night, we took a hike out to the lighthouse with our headlamps. Having seen many a lighthouse, I was surprised at how mystical they appear at night. The light looks like a giant crystal with 9 large rays spreading out like a god-like halo. Bailey was not so much interested in the lighthouse as he was in the porcupine - which we, luckily, caught on to before he caught a faceful of prickles.

As I write this blog, I am sitting in a coffee shop, eavesdropping on the old fogies as they expound on their theories on politics, economics, the dairy industry, the end of the world, global warming, and even structral engineering in China. Though not always well-informed, they are enthusiaticly opinionated, and very entertaining. This is the real grass-roots movement.

Received MARVELOUSLY FANTASTIC news the other day! My good buddy Kjersti, and her man Joel, have jumped the bandwagon and are travel bound themselves! They plan to leave ol' P-Town behind for some sailing, Alaska, and New Zealand! I'm still giddy with excitement!!!!! (more exclamation points? Ok - why not)!!!!!!!!!!

The New Year!

2010-01-03T20:51:00.000-08:00

This last weekend has been magnifique! We kicked off the brand spanking new year right with good times and good friends

- is it "oh ten" or just "ten" or is it "twenty ten"? We decided "ten" is the preferred nomenclature so let's just keep that going shall we -

We thought that our best chance of really testing out the ol' prowler and seeing what she's made of, would be to take her into some nice freezing rain, on a skinny highway, in the middle of the night, with some nice cliffs on the side. We were able to brave the perilous trip from Vancouver, WA to White Salmon, WA - but there were the occasional shouts of "did you hear that noise?" "what the hell was that?"

Upon our arrival in White Salmon, we found our friends at the White Salmon Inn in Washington

http://www.innofthewhitesalmon.com/ (Shameless plug because I love this place - check out their BRT deal) in fine form and ready to rally and bring in the new year right. There were costumes and champagne bottles and an epic snowball fight from the porch that brought 3 strangers up from the street to join in the festivities. We made it to the White Salmon brew pub to rock out to live music and kiss strangers (Kjersti - naughty naughty, I kid, I kid).

Somehow we managed to drag ourselves out of bed at some ungodly hour to ride the slopes at Mt. Hood. At about 15 minutes from the parking lot with rain on the windshild we were moments away from turning around. But the ever-stoked-to-be-on-the-mountain Joel assured us that "conditions were perfect", it was..."business time".

Oddly enough, it was one of our best days on the mountain. We rode in a Wolf Pack, Jon, me, Kjersti, Joel, Kjersti's bro Aaron, and Jesse. The rain turned into fluffy powder at Mt Hood Meadows and it fell all day so that each run was better than the next. Turns out, we were among the few, the proud, who made it out of bed the day after New Years. We lost Flo and Nicole but met back up with them at the bar for some football action and those of us born in Corvallis were not sad to see the Ducks lose (ok, maybe a little).

The next day Jon and I took 'er easy with a nice hike up 'ol Baldy Peak (or so Jon has named it). There was no trail, so what could we do but climb straight up? At the top, with sore legs for both of us, Jon took a rock and chucked it down the hill (come on, you have to when you're at the top of a steep and never-ending hill). Well Bailey took it upon himself to retrieve the rock for Jon; which meant that he disappeared off the shear cliff face. Jon and I were convinced that he had gone the way of the lemmings and tried to go after him. Jon saw him almost at the bottom of the hill running all the way back up. That dog never ceases to amaze. Needless to say, we had worn him out for the day.

The party continued on through the weekend with trips to the hot tub (sanctioned for once - thank you Dave) and rolls in the snow for the all but the pansies in the group (you know who you are), wine tasting, and an all out battle royale on the shuffleboard table. The next day, we were joined by Darcy and Matt, for some sweet fishing on the Klikitat River, followed by a fire with hot dogs, beer, and great company. We were sad to leave our good buddies, I'm not ashamed to admit that I teared up pretty good saying goodbye to Kjersti - but we must keep the good times rolling.

By the way, feel free to send us on quest (all fearless adventurers need one) and check out the pictures and video below.

And stay tuned for an exciting tour of the Prowler...

Welcome!

2009-12-17T15:10:00.000-08:00

Hello and welcome to our blog.
Your vicarious journey through this blog will bring you to the ends of the earth and back, seeking out only the most thrilling and toe-curling adventures.
You will meet fanciful characters.
You will experience Nature at her most exquisite and untamed.
You will feast upon rattlesnakes, wild mushrooms, and paua.
The stars will no longer hide from you in a blanket of light pollution.
The campfire will be your television set.
You will live in a gypsy caravan with your two best friends and throw your watch away for good.
You will bathe in mountain streams with Dr. Bronners peppermint soap and wonder why you ever needed coffee in the morning.
The gym will be replaced by an axe and a pile of firewood.
You will leave behind your winter doldrums and your daily schedule.
You will marvel at your unwillingness to return.
If at anytime you feel compelled to leave your life behind and join our gypsy caravan, you will be more than welcome.