Journey of Questions

WONDER

2010-06-06T18:20:00.000-07:00

Here is a picture of some of the youth I went with to the Zoo.

I love to see this look of Wonder in people's eyes!

click image to enlarge!

In light of recent flooding...here is the lectionary scripture from this past Sunday

2010-05-11T16:50:00.000-07:00

"The Lord is king, He is robed in majesty; the Lord is robed, He is girded with strength. He has established the world; it shall never be moved; your throne is established from of old; you are from everlasting.

The floods have lifted up, O Lord, the floods have lifted up their voice; the floods lift up their roaring. More majestic than the thunders of mighty waters, more majestic than the waves of the sea, majestic on high is the Lord!

Your decrees are very sure; holiness befits your house, O Lord, for evermore." -Psalm 93 (NRSV)

The Winter Olympics

2010-02-22T19:42:00.000-08:00

I think the Olympics are on way the world still has wonder. Not only the opening and closing ceremonies, which in themselves are amazing places to see creation! But even the events themselves, the athletes who achieve incredible things, the skills they have worked on their whole life.

Even, and this is especially true in the Winter Olympics, the location and set ups of the events are things to wonder at. So beautiful! So majestic! So WONDERful!

Go USA! Way to Go God!!

Special thanks to http://www.nbcolympics.com/ for the pics!

Lent and the loss of Wonder...

2010-02-19T15:40:00.000-08:00

For the season of lent this year, I am going to attempt to journal every day. I tried this last year at it really helped remind me the need to take time to just BE. The goal of taking on or fasting from something during lent is to grow in love of God and grow in love of others. I will be posting some of these journal entries here.
Here is yesterday’s journal entry:

I was leaving a friend’s house tonight, and I looked up at the sky and the stars were breath taking and I heard something move in the yard. As I looked for a squirrel, but found eight deer!!

It was so cool! So I called my friends on the phone, and told them and they were not impressed. They were like "We've seen the deer before."
REALLY?!?!?!
How can you get to a point where you are no longer in awe and wonder?
I feel like a lot of times we no longer sit in awe of creation. It makes me sad. I think we need to capture wonder back. Maybe I will journal about this during lent? My search for wonder...

HAITI DONATIONS and RESPONSE

2010-01-23T21:08:00.000-08:00

Here is one of the great organizations helping in Haiti right now.

It is UMCOR (United Methodist Committee on Relief. Because UMCOR is connected with the United Methodist Church, all of its administrative costs are covered so literally 100% donated goes to relief!

Here is a link to their site, you can donate money or make kits of supplies to send to them. All the info is here -->;UMCOR

Haiti, and the Christian Community Responses

2010-01-23T21:03:00.000-08:00

In light of everything going on with Haiti, there have been many different reactions form the Christian community. There have been millions praying and sending money and help to Haiti. I have to say that I am very proud of almost all of them, but here is a video from one I am not.
Link to Pat Robinson Video

In response to this and several other comments like this, here is a letter from Bishop Joe Pennel, a United Methodist Bishop:

"FROM THE BACK PEW
While driving to Church yesterday I heard a preacher say that what happened in Haiti was the will of God. I do not agree. I believe that the devastation and loss of life made God cry.
I believe that God has created a world where different pushes and pulls are at work. We live in a world with great differences in natural phenomena, and these differences can "bump" into each other or "mesh together". When this occurs the unpredictable is sure to happen. The creation is not programmed so that one aspect of nature never touches or influences another. On the contrary, these dissimilarities have a mysterious way of challenging and influencing one another. When such interactions happen, change and turbulence and even mass destruction are possible. We cannot stop the interactions of nature nor can we get out of the way of the outcomes.
The universe is not a puppet on a string and it is not programmed to run smoothly. There is a freedom in creation, just as there is a freedom in the human species.
This answer does not satisfy all of my questions but it is the best that I can do at this juncture of my theological journey. But for me--blaming God is not the answer.
It is worth pondering,

Joe E. Pennel Jr.
Worn Out Preacher."

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS?....
WHAT IS YOUR RESPONSE TO HAITI?

5 Minute Life Story

2009-12-29T22:25:00.000-08:00

So Joanna and I have this thing that we call a 5 Minute Life Story. In short, it is when you take the time to listen, I mean really listen, to someone who might otherwise just be overlooked; and in turn they share with you basically their life story.

We have had this happen all sort of places: Grocery stores, the mall, department stores, and tonight it was the movie theater.

My friends and I went to go see Sherlock Holmes, which I highly recommend, and after the movie we went out to get coffee. The problem is that even though we live near a big city, Nashville, we don't live close enough for everything to stay open late, so after trying Starbucks, Boarders, and then even McDonald's, we returned to the movie theater. There is a special going on on Tuesdays that you can buy a small drink and small popcorn for a dollar each! So, it ended up being a perfect place to chill after the movie.

Anyway, after drinking the very small drink rather quickly, and seeing that no one was left in the lobby, I went back to the counter to see if I could get a free refill on my already cheap drink. The girl, Allie, proceeded to refill my drink and as I asked how her night was going and stopped to listen....

I learned that she was not having a very good night. She was sick, and wished that she did not have to work so much, but also she did not wish to go home because it was not a good place either. She said that she wished she was busier so that she did not have time to think about everything that was going on. She could not have been out of high school yet. It is at this time that I wish I could just stop everything in life and listen, as long as she needed....

On the way out, the was another theater employee started to share about his life.

I find it amazing what happens when you actually listen. We have heard about people breaking up, a girl whose boyfriend was too pushy sexually, we got to know a girl in our last town so well that we would go see her volleyball games, and much more.

When was the last time you ask someone how they were doing, and took the time to listen?

You might be amazing what people will tell you.

It all makes me wonder, How often are people actually allowed the place to share? The reason it means so much to them that we listen, is because most people struggle to find someone who will....

Will you listen?

A Real Fireplace

2009-12-28T15:49:00.000-08:00

In our new apartment, we have a real fireplace. Not one that uses electricity or even gas, but a real wood fireplace. I must admit that I am kind of addicted to making fires. I always have been, but now I have one at my finger tips all the time.

The thing about a real fireplace is that it doesn't just happen. You cannot just click a remote or turn a handle. You have to find wood, find starter sticks and paper or pine cones, you have to poke at it and work on it.

Sometimes it happens really quick and nice, and other times it doesn't even really work at all.

It started me thinking about relationships. Relationships don't just happen (much to Facebook's and Myspace's dismay). They take effort, giving, pain, sacrific, poking, and love. You have to work on them. Much like a gas fireplace, we have tried to replace the hard work of real fire, with an easy substitute; we have replaced real relationships with easy substitutes.

Think about all your relationships. What are the ones you really work on them? The ones that you truely spend time and effort on? How much more to they mean to you and probably to them? This is not just because they are special, but it is because they are real...

I recommend making a fire (in a safe place) sometime, a real fire. See how you have to keep an eye on it, keep working at it. Maybe it will lead you to rethink your relationships...

A story begins...

2009-12-28T14:17:00.000-08:00

It seems that so much of our time working on staff at a church is spent trying to produce the "best" church experience. We worry about what people will say if we do this or that; we wonder if people will like this; we don't try things for fear of running people off; we spend so much time guessing and tiptoeing around...

I feel like if there is one thing in life and in ministry that matters at all it is relationships; relationship with God and relationship with others. That's it. Not programs, not buildings, not stuff, but relationships.

What if all of our focus was spent on these relationships? What would change in our churches? What would change with how our churches interact with their communities? Would it be harder or easier? Would it be more fulfilling or less? Would it matter?

I don't really know, but I have some guesses, but all I can really do is go out there and live it. Not in a cliche type of doing it because it is the next best thing in a book, but because it is what I feel called by God to do.

I hope to report back with stories... we will see

In faith, hope and love...

Writing and guitar...

2009-11-14T20:41:00.000-08:00

Many times, I find myself wishing there was more time in the day.

I know I am not the only one who has ever thought this but it is time to do something about it.

For me, I want more time because I dont have enough time to write and think and play guitar...
So, I am going to start writing songs and playing them on guitar...

What do you wish you had more time for?

A gathering of people who share life together

2009-11-10T09:28:00.000-08:00

What if the church was simply a gathering of people who share life together?

I love thinking about these things, and I find myself thinking about them a lot. The only struggle I have is that when I look at what other people do in response to questions about how the church could change or about what it could be. It seems they almost always abandon everything including their church and tradition in order to start over.

For me, for whatever reason I have this strong need to help the current church shift. I cannot justify just starting something new and forgetting that I am a part of a huge tradition of people seeking God.

As a Methodist, when I go back to our beginnings with Wesley, they really seem to fit with everything the "new" churches are trying to do. The problem is that current churches are in no way similar to where the Methodist church started.

So how can we help the current church notice that they are missing it; to help them see they have missed one generation already and are on the road to miss several more?

I think one way to do this is to simplify what we are doing. We have a program for everything as if the programs themselves are a way to salvation. What would it look like if we cut out many things we currently do and just intentionally gathered together?

I think that there would be a lot of good that comes from this.

How would we still do worship of God without all the exact same people doing the exact same thing every week?
How would relationships between generations change?
How would staffing the church change?

What if a churches focus was simply "Loving God, Loving Neighbor"?

What if the church was simply a gathering of people who share life together?

Why does it have to be so complicated?

2009-10-30T16:34:00.000-07:00

Why do we make church and being a Christian so complicated?
We have committees for everything...WHY?
We have events for everything that we do...WHY?
We have certain ways we must do a worship service...WHY?
We have divisions of ministries based on age...WHY?
We are so worried about maintain our buildings, and not relationships...WHY?

We feel that there are certain expectations for things...WHY?
We build the most elaborate and expensive building, often for twice a week..WHY?
We hire staff to build programs to...WHY?
We try so hard to get people in the buildings, but we never go to them...WHY?

What if it was simpler?
What if it is supposed to be simpler?

What if we gathered together, shares our hearts, good and bad, knowing no matter what we are loved. What if we shared our true unfiltered lives together, and as a community...we shared in communion?

Why does it have to me so complicated? WHY?

Missions in Church

2009-10-13T19:22:00.001-07:00

I feel that a lot of times we think that missions in a church setting are only for those who are already part of the church. For some reason it has become looked down upon for visitors and seekers to join in...WHY?

This generation born from 1980s til now see the great desire for justice in the world. They know that we are all to play a part in redeeming the world...they just might not know that is what it is.

WHY can we not invite them to join us in missions; the churches way of redeeming the world? WHY can't mission be the main focus of the church?

WHY are we scared to invite others to join us in serving?
WHAT do we fear will happen?
WHAT if this is what the church is supposed to do: Figure out where God is working in the world, join in, and invited others along too?

Break the Circle

2009-10-13T19:16:00.000-07:00

Maybe the reason we don't hang out with non-Christians too much or want them around much is we are afraid that they might see us mess up and be real, not perfect...and with us not being perfect, we fear that that might make them think our faith is not good enough...but it is when we are real, and they see that God invites imperfect people to the journey...that is when they want to join in.
So they want real, we don't want them to see the real us, so how can we break this circle...WE MUST BREAK THIS CIRCLE

too long...

2009-08-08T19:49:00.000-07:00

So it has been so long since my last post. I think that maybe it is because I have struggled to be inspired or chalenged in such a way that I needed to think externally. Since the last post, Joanna and I have reallized we are called to move cities and start semenary.

Now, four months later from our first talk about this, we have moved to Brentwood, TN. We are both working at Forest Hills UMC, and we are both going to semenary!!!

It seems like so many times we think that God moves so slow, that we have to wait for him to finally listen to us... Well, in this case, God acted so fast, it felt like He had to wait on us. I wonder if this is how it really works?

Maybe God is waiting on us for the BEST thing, and we feel like we are waiting on God but for the GOOD thing. Maybe the reason we feel like we are waiting on God is that we are waiting for the wrong thing?

As Always... Just thoughts.
Can't wait to start thinking again!!!

Heaven Christianity

2009-03-26T07:37:00.000-07:00

There are Christians out there who believe that everything is about getting to Heaven. They have faith in God so that they can get into Heaven. They try to convert others so that they can get to Heaven. There are even evangelism tracks out there called "Ticket to Heaven."
I have asked myself a lot: "Is this really all Christianity is about? Getting to Heaven?"
I think for me Heaven Christianity bothers me because it is a selfish Christianity. If I become Christian because i want to go to Heaven when I die, that has everything to do with me and almost nothing to do with God.

Heaven Christianity= Selfish Christianity

This is also seen in how people view god. There are beliefs and even song lyrics that literally say: "Jesus was born to die." They are ignoring everything in the middle; His life, miracles, love, healing, teachings...if all Jesus was born for was death, could not God just sent him down as a man to die?
Jesus' life was the example to us not only in how to live, but He showed us how much God loves us.
Christianity, being a follower of Christ, should have everything to do with God and very little to do with us. It should be a LOVE focus, not a Heaven focus. Following God has just as much merit in the present, right here and now, as it does in the future when we die.
I want faith to matter now. It has to matter now. I want God's love to pour out of me and Christians everywhere. I want to live a life focused on what God wants, not what I want.
This is something I can just say and go on with my life, if I do I am no better than Heaven Christians. I must live it out, my life as a living sacrifice to God.

John 15:12-13
"My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends."

Lord, teach me to share this love, to live this love

SSSHHhhhhhh........

2009-03-26T07:33:00.000-07:00

Silence...

Today we spent 30 minutes in silence in youth group. Fast from sounds to focus on God.
I have to say there is something about removing all inputs so we can truly focus on God.
For me, there was a sense of peace. Peace, that even if I am not running around trying to do all I can, God is still in control. There is just something about knowing God is God and I am not. There is a great and deep peace within that.
I need to remember this more often. I need to know taking time for me is OK.

People in my life - Journal

2009-03-26T07:29:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow, I get to hang out with about 35 people who work with teens, some of my favorite people in the world.
One of the things we are going to talk about is who were the people in our lives that have made the biggest impact.
Here is a partial list of mine in no order:
Joanna
Jeff
Karyn
Kelly G
Jill Q
Jill K
Dr Olds
Susy Boner
Ed
Julie
Emily McLemore
My Parents
My Grandparents
Deech
Paul Boner
Steve - my brother
Bishop Spain
Mark Acker
The Limbauchers
Sally Smith
Cara L
John Wade

My prayer is that I can be this kind of person to others in my life.

March 12th - From my Journal

2009-03-16T07:18:00.000-07:00

Be Still....

There is something about taking time to stop that really makes you think. It is probably because unless you stop, all you are really doing is reacting. Reacting to life, reacting to situations, reacting to people.
By taking time to pause each day to think, reflect, and listen; I have found I get more done, I feel better about my days, I listen more to others, and I grow.
The last one is my favorite, GROW. Life can often seen routine, bland, boring, and sometimes worthless. I have found myself, a lot, feeling stuck like I can't grow. What I am realizing is that it is not where I am, it is I was not taking a pause.
I want to make a commitment to myself to stop more. I want to grow, I want to learn, I want a challenge. I want to know God and myself more. I need to stop ad truly listen to my soul.

Lord, in my stillness may I grow to know more fully that you are God and I am not.

March 11th - From my Journal

2009-03-16T07:11:00.001-07:00

Why does it seem so hard sometimes to rely on God?

I know I have had times in my life where things did not go how I wanted them to, and I have and do struggle in these times to rely on God.
One time like this was when I tore my ACL along with everything else in my knee. I was being recruited by 200 college and universities for football, and when this happened it really messed up my big recruiting year. Needless to say, many schools stopped recruiting me and I struggled to rely on God's plan. I wondered, why me? I really struggled with not being able to be active like I had been my whole life.
Through it all, and every situation since, I have learned that it is in these times it is those around us that help us rely on God. People praying for us, people relating to us, people being willing to listen to us.
It is through community that we are brought back to the table with God, remembering to trust and rely on Him. I cannot thank all the people who have done this in my life. The only way I can think of is to try to be this type of person with those in my life.
1 Corinthians 12:12-31

Lord, guide me to guide others back to you...

March 10th From my Journal

2009-03-16T07:02:00.000-07:00

Worth, Value

These are interesting words. It seems like people have all different ways they find their worth: how much they make, what they own, maybe even how many kids they have. For me, one of the ways I find worth is being able to share with people.
This is the reason my lent commitment to write in my journal everyday have turned into post on my blog what I write on my journal each day. I want to share life with people, discuss topics, hold conversations. The hard part is that a lot of times, I struggle to find worth in this way. Maybe others are too busy, sometimes I'm too busy, sometimes the relationships are just fluff with no depth.
One of the things God is teaching me through this journal is that in the end, when all else is stripped away, the one place I need to find and will find my worth in is Him.
People have all different ways they find their worth; I want mine to be in God.

"For You have been my hope, Sovereign Lord,
my confidence since my youth.
From birth I have relied on you;
you brought me forth from my mother's womb
I will ever praise you!"
-Psalm 71:5-6

March 9th - From my Journal

2009-03-10T17:34:00.000-07:00

I really don't like pushy Evangelists...

I guess the real reason behind it is because I feel like they have an agenda to get me and others saved so they can feel good about how great a Christian they are. First off, having an agenda means your focus is not about the relationship or the journey, but they are focused on the end goal.

I believe God is LOVE. Not a romantic guy/girl love, but a true unconditional love. What this means first is that it must be about relationships. Love cannot exist out in the middle of no where, but must exist between: between humans, between God and mankind, between God and God's self, that is why God is a trinity.

As Christians, we are to exemplify this Love to the world, the only way to do that is relationships. The only way to have real, true, deep relationships is to take time, effort, and honesty it needs to exist. When we make these efforts, we find it is so simple to share our faith we know who they are and we can relate with them.

God showed this so well with Christ. He became flesh and dwelt among us so that He could truly relate to our situation, and so that we could no longer use "you don't know" as an excuse.

To many people are turned off from being a Christian by evangelist who don't and aren't willing to get to know someone good enough so they can no longer say "you don't know."

Evangelism is not and should never be a way of life where you walk so closely with God that people cannot help but draw near to God. The way it should work is that people who you have relationships with, friends, students, kids, adults,etc. cannot help but learn about God, not by words but by your life, and in doing so they grow to better know God.

"Share Christ with everyone you meet, when necessary use words." - St. Francis

1 Corinthians 13 (parts)
"Love never gives up
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head
DOESN'T FORCE ITSELF ON OTHERS
Isn't always "me first"...
...puts up with anything
Trusts God always
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back
But keeps going to the end.
Love never dies!"

Lord teach me to be this love.

March 8th - From my Journal

2009-03-10T17:33:00.000-07:00

March 7th - From my Journal

2009-03-10T17:22:00.000-07:00

I love how people are unique. Today I spent a great day with Joanna. During the day I was reminded of some of the ways we are different.

Joanna is very motivated, this includes things from the largest to smallest tasks. We got up today and had a list of things to do; Joanna's mission was to finish that list. She also has this internal thing telling her to go..go..go..go..go..all the time.

For me, I don't really know if I have ever made a list; let alone felt compelled to complete it. Also, unless there is a pressing need for something to get done, I usually won't worry to much about getting around to it.

Today, these to sides met, which is something that happens a lot. In the end, we were able to hang out with each other a lot, and the whole list was completed!

I know I have already learned a lot about and from Joanna. I am now more motivated at keeping things in order and finishing things as son as I can. I think she has learned from me that it is OK to chill and relax every once in a while.

I believe we can learn a lot about ourselves by looking at other people. We are all unique and have something unique to offer.

Lord, teach me to appreciate everyone in my life.

March 6th - From my Journal

2009-03-07T10:08:00.001-08:00

I have found that there are a lot of things in my life that I spend a lot of time on that in no way are important: Free online computer games, TV shows, etc.
It seems like I do these things because they are simple and mindless and relax me, but when I really look at them and how I feel, all they do is drain me and leave me with an uninspired, more bored, and unmotivated feeling.
I know I am far into lent, but besides journaling which leaves me refreshed and inspired, I think I am going to spend much less time online and more time reading and being outside and with my wife!
When it comes down to it, I want to live an inspired, motivated, deeper life!!!