Journey to the Darkside

A chapter is closed

2009-11-06T19:39:00.001-08:00

I had thought about writing this blog post tomorrow when I'm a bit more sober but I decided to go ahead and write. I've been feeling very emotional tonight and had a few emotional breakdowns and have gotten into the merlot. My Dad passed away about six months ago. I have been waiting for the estate to get settled. It was hard because he did a homemade will and my sister wound up doing a lot of the work to get it done. I had thought that it would be another week for the settlement until my sister phoned and left me an urgent message tonight to phone her. The estate is settled. The money was deposited and the chapter is closed. I had a very emotional conversation with her on the phone about it all.

It was a bittersweet moment for me. Usually someone is happy when they get a bunch of money come into their bank account. All I could do was cry though. I felt conflicted. I got a lot of money but the price was very high for it. I had to lose my Dad in order for me to get it. I had another dream of my Dad last night and it caused me some insomnia. I've been dreaming of him a lot lately. I think that he would have wanted me to have this money before Christmas. He was all about the holidays. We would sometime go months without speaking but we would always resolve things around the holidays. I don't know how to have Christmas without him. I feel this was his final gift to me and it is a very bittersweet moment for me. The chapter is closed but he's gone. I feel peace but yet so much intense sadness in my heart.

It's been a really, really rough week for me. I screwed up big time!! I broke 3 major rules and misbehaved terribly. I have a punishment coming to me that involves the cane. I have not had a caning in a very long time but I know it's deserved. I wish I could be a better slave. I don't know what's been wrong with me lately. I think I am trying to deal with all the major changes that are happening in my life.

I'd like to thank all the people who have been there for me the last few months with losing my Dad. It was a very difficult chapter in my life and there were some people who supported me and were there for me. They know who they are. Thank you!! I know I have not been easy to be around and I appreciate all the love and support from those that I love and care about. I hope that I can find some peace from this chapter being closed. It's been a long and difficult journey and I hope I can find some happiness within the sadness that I am feeling tonight.

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Happy HNT - My spanked bottom

2009-11-04T10:19:00.000-08:00

Happy HNT (Half-Nekkid Thursday) everyone! This picture was taken at the beginning of October. Master Anakin had taken the day off work and we had a bit of time to play so he took me upstairs and got me to dress comfortably in my lingerie but I was told not to wear any panties. He used his belt on my poor bottom and used the leather to spank me. He also used a paddle to give me a few hard strokes to finish it off. My ass was red and marked and he took this picture of it just after spanking me. You can get a glimpse of my lower back tattoo also in the picture.

The craving for a spanking has gotten stronger each day. We have not played in almost 3 weeks and all I can think about today is getting my bottom spanked. It's like an itch that I can't scratch. I really hope that there can be some play time this weekend with Darth Vader. I need a spanking and he knows how to spank hard!! I really hope we can squeeze some time in and play!! *crosses fingers*

Please leave us a comment on our HNT picture. We really enjoy hearing from you and getting feedback on our pictures. Check out Osbasso's blog if you are interested in participating in the HNT series.

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Moving forward on my journey

2009-11-03T11:04:00.000-08:00

I feel like there is so much passion in me today. A desire to escape into some play time and lots of sex!! I'm horny and I'd love to be able to have a few hours to play with Darth Vader. The timing just hasn't worked out for us to be able to do that lately and it's frustrating me. The last time we played together was at Rascal's which was almost 3 weeks ago!! It's been one thing after another lately. I was feeling horny yesterday so he allowed me permission to masturbate but all that did was add fuel to the fire. I thought about a rough fantasy with Master and was able to make myself cum but I desired more. I need a beating. Today it is all I can think about. The craving is so strong.

It does not help that I've been having some naughty chats on MSN lately with a few different people. That's helped me to get very horny sometimes and inspire some fantasies. I've also got a crush on a really sexy girl who I've been getting to know. *smiles* I've been getting to know a couple (Galen and fire) and there has been some naughty chatting and also some sexy possibilities happening. I am hoping to go to Sin City (a bdsm club in Vancouver) with them next weekend for my first time! I met Galen and fire at the Taboo Naughty but Nice show in January. I saw them there and felt some chemistry happening and had wanted to have a drink with them or maybe do some shopping together. I was with Shiro at the time though and he didn't seem very interested in that so it didn't happen.

I friended them on Fetlife (I am "padmeamidala" on Fetlife in case you want to add me to your friend's list) and we've been getting to know each other. I am glad to have found another woman that I have so much in common with. I've talked to fire on the phone and we have grown close and I am really happy to have some new friends in my life with the possibility of perhaps more happening.

There have been a few other possibilities happening with the poly aspect of our relationship although mostly all casual types of play. I played with my friend, Shann at the Dead Sexy party last Friday and am hoping we can play again sometime. I've also talked to my friend, Doc about doing some possible play with her too sometime. It's nice to have some casual play partners that I can get together with and spank and be able to Top. Master Anakin is always looking for casual play partners too that he can spank and have fun with! He sure spanks hard though! Just ask Doc about that and the time he spanked her at Rascal's. *grins*

November is starting to look like a really good month for events and some fun ahead. This weekend is the Taboo show. I'm not sure if we are going yet but it's a possibility. Next weekend is Sin City!! Rascal's is on the 21st! We are also hoping to go to a play party at LB's at the end of the month. AND today is the first munch in our area and I am hosting it with my friend, Shann. I am really excited that a few people have said they are coming to the munch tonight! I have not been to one in over a year and it's exciting to be hosting this one and organizing it. It's a very neat feeling to host a munch.

I have a feeling that there will be lots to blog about this month! It's been great to be getting out to events again and meeting some new friends and also some possibilities happening with the poly again. It's been a long time since I opened my heart up to someone other than Master Anakin and I feel ready to date again and see what happens. My Dad's estate is also about to be settled any day and I feel that chapter is about to be closed. The past is the past and I'm moving forward on my journey. A new chapter begins...

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

The Dead Sexy woman's play party

2009-10-31T13:30:00.001-07:00

I hope everyone had a good Halloween! I've had a really good weekend so far. Friday was the Dead Sexy Play party. It is an all girl's play party. No boys are allowed! I was pretty nervous about going but curious to see what it would be like. My friend, Shann picked me up around 6 pm on Friday night. We headed to the Old Spaghetti Factory for dinner. She wore her costume to the restaurant and looked fantastic! She wore a really sexy Geisha costume with a sexy corset. I ordered Chicken Penne and a big bellini drink. It calmed my nerves a bit.

I enjoyed getting to know Shann and had a nice dinner out with her. We headed out to Vancouver to the Wise Hall which is where the Rascal's play parties are normally held. I got changed as soon as we got there. I got dressed into my red corset and long black suede skirt, fishnet, leather boots and blue wig. I also had my feather boa to complete the sexy outfit. I put up a picture today of me wearing my red collar and Goth necklace that I got for Halloween. I was going to wear a new mask I got but decided against it. I didn't see anyone else wearing masks and actually felt a bit overdressed. There was a lot of women wearing leather. A lot of leather dykes. Leather vests and pants and a few women who looked a lot like men. I felt like a femme in the midst of a lot of butch women dressed in leather.

The atmosphere in the Dead Sexy party was pretty nice and intimate. It was set up a lot different than Rascal's complete with a few sex swings and tables for playing and the St. Andrew's cross and such. There was some music going on in the background and the lighting was low. They had created a nice play area including an age play area and also a puppy play one too. About 50 people came to the event. I was expecting a lot more people.

I was a bit disappointed that not many people came up to us to talk. The organizer did say hello but most people seemed into their own groups and I didn't recognize too many people from other events. I tried to approach someone after going to the concession and she wasn't too friendly. I was hoping to meet some new friends and that didn't really happen at the Dead Sexy party. I wish it had been more social.

There was a few awkward moments in the beginning of the night. I watched a few interesting scenes. There was some single tail action happening and also a girl dressed up as a bunny hopping around. I saw a dog fight (they were pretending to be dogs) between two dykes dressed in leather. There was one girl ganged up on by a gang of dykes and that was pretty hot to watch. One woman was in a cage while the other teased and taunted her. I enjoyed watching women making out with and kissing women. I had wanted to kiss Shann at one point but held back.

I eventually mentioned to Shann that I had brought my toys. I made sure to tell her that there was no expectations and she didn't have to play if she didn't want to. She wanted to see my toys and we talked a bit about what she likes and limits. I have only Topped a few women and was nervous about it and trying to make sure I was doing a good job of it. She liked most of the spanking toys except the chain flogger. I don't really blame her! That toy is a real mean one.

We went up to the play area and I laid out my toys and she laid down on the spanking table. She was able to grip the end part of it. She took off her Geisha robe and got down to her panties and thigh-hi's. She had a beautiful back tattoo which I got to run my hands over. I noticed her black lace panties and was surprised! She was wearing the same panties as me! We had both bought ours at the same place. That gave us both a bit of a giggle.

I started out with a slow warm up. I started with my hand and gave her an erotic hand spanking. I then started to flow her with the suede flogger I brought. She had mentioned to me that she has never been flogged before. I was happy to give her the first time of being flogged and tried to make it an enjoyable experience for her. I would give her some lighter strokes and then surprise her with a harder hit which made her squirm around and squeal at times. She had such a cute red bottom which was warm to the touch. I enjoyed spanking and flogging her bum and also trying to give plenty of erotic touching and rubbing. I even gave her a bit of tickle torture with the erotic feather that I brought.

The people beside us playing were also spanking and I could hear a few hits with a paddle and decided to join in the with the fun. I brought out the leather paddle and gave her a few good hard strokes with it. Her bottom turned a nice shade of red after a while. I kissed her bum better in the midst of some hard strokes. I also did some play bites and lots and lots of rubbing. I used my feather to tease her red bottom and give her a different feel to the spanking.

I noticed a few people watching me spank her. One girl did a really big smile at me as I was paddling her bum. I gave her a few really hard strokes and she used her safeword. I made sure to stroke her hair and kiss her head and tell her what a good girl she was. She was floating in a very deep subspace. I got her a blanket and got her a chair and gave her lots of hugs as well as cleaned up our play area.

We spent a bit of time together and watched a few other scenes happening. There was one girl getting caned so hard that she was bleeding. The woman caning her had some impressive whip marks on her back. There was some fisting action happening on one of the sex swings. I could hear the woman moaning and having orgasms. I watched two really sexy women make out with one another. I could feel the heat coming from them and it turned me on.

A pretty blonde girl turned around and started talking to us. She had smiled at me while I was paddling Shann. I was almost tempted to ask her to go up for a spanking but I wasn't sure that was a good idea to leave Shann when she was in subspace and felt that might be rude. We talked for a while and then left to head back home. We pulled up to the front of my place and kissed goodbye. I was pretty happy after a wonderful night out with a good friend. It was a lot of fun.

Shann and I are hosting a munch next week and have talked about going to other events together. I think it would be great to find others female which I can have casual play with. I enjoy spanking women and really enjoyed being able to Top Shann. I hope she will let me play with her again one day!

Halloween was so much fun and a great day. I even managed to squeeze in a quick fuck with Master while the kids were out trick or treating. It was one of the best Halloween nights ever!! October has been a really good month full of fun times and memorial events like the Dead Sexy Party!!

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Happy Halloween!

2009-10-30T12:11:00.001-07:00

Hot Halloween Graphics!

Happy HNT - Happy Halloween!

2009-10-28T09:14:00.000-07:00

Happy HNT (Half-Nekkid Thursday) everyone! We've got a special HNT picture to put up this week for Halloween. I was dressed up in my sexy vampire costume one year for Halloween complete with vampire fangs. Master added the bats which also helped to cover up my face a bit for privacy. He also added this really cool dark castle which probably has lots of vampires in it. I also LOVE the Darth Vader pumpkin. So neat! I've always had a fascination with vampires. I think I've passed it on to my daughter. She has been watching The Vampire Diaries as well as was obsessed with Twilight and many of the vampire movies like Queen of the Damned. She has also worn my vampire costume to a school event.

Halloween is just around the corner. I've been watching lots of horror movies lately and enjoying the feel of this time of the year. Halloween has always been my favorite time of the year. This weekend is going to be amazing and I can't wait!! I am going to my first Queer Woman's play party on Friday night. The Dead Sexy play party which is being held at the same location as Rascal's. My friend, Shann and I met for a coffee a few weeks ago and she asked me to go to this event and I think it should be a lot of fun! Shann and I are hosting a munch together in our area and that starts next Tuesday.

Friday is going to be fun! I have no clue what to wear or even what to expect from this type of event. I'm sure I'll have lots to blog about. Saturday is Halloween! Wooo hoooo!! We have lots family plans with our kids. We've decorated our place and plan to watch lots of scary movies and enjoy a night with our kids. Leia is having a sleepover so it should be a pretty fun evening for them. We will be carving our pumpkins tomorrow night. What are your plans for Halloween this weekend?

Sunday is a munch and I am trying to find a ride to it so I can go. I have not been to a munch in a year. I'd like to see my friends again and hope that is possible. If not, there is the munch on Tuesday which I will be hosting with my friend, Shann. It's exciting to be hosting a new one and I hope lots of people will show up for it.

Happy Halloween everyone!

Please leave us a comment. We'd love to hear from you. Also, please check out Osbasso's blog if you are interested in participating in the HNT series.

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Boobees

2009-10-26T10:46:00.001-07:00

I hope everyone had a good weekend. I had a nice weekend with Master and also our family. I started my period yesterday so I've been feeling very tired and kind of ill. I'm in hibernation mode and don't feel like doing much right now. I've been spending lots of time watching horror movies and relaxing by our gas fireplace. It's one of my favorite things to do to relax during the cold months. Halloween is just around the corner! My favorite time of the year. I'm so excited! I've got a few things to look forward to this weekend for Halloween. I'm so glad it's on a Saturday this year! Woot!

I've got a huge bite mark on my neck from Master Anakin. It's so big that I think I better cover it up when I go out. People might think I've gotten bit from a vampire!!

This picture is so cute and it's perfect for Halloween! A couple of "boobees" for your Halloween enjoyment. :)

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

UFC pub night with Master Anakin

2009-10-25T11:05:00.000-07:00

It's been a pretty good weekend so far. Friday night with our movie & merlot night. We watched a really good horror movie called Trick R Treat. It was really good and we enjoyed watching it. I also enjoyed some merlot and cuddle time with Master. We stayed up very late so we could enjoy a quickie together. I mentioned how much I needed cock and he was very happy to oblige me. He gave me a big orgasm and we fell asleep in each others arms.

I woke up yesterday with no plans for the day. I had been invited out to Sin City and discussed it with Master. He had some different plans in mind for us and told me that I can go to Sin City but another time. He arranged sitting with our daughter and told her she could invite a friend over to watch Halloween movies with our son and have a fun evening in. He wanted to take me out on a date. I love date nights with Master. I was really looking forward to it.

We spent the day shopping for Halloween. We bought our pumpkins and some new decorations and put them up. The kids are ready also with their costumes for Halloween. Leia has decided to dress up even though she is not going trick or treating this year. We got ready for our date and headed out for the night. UFC 104 was last night and Master had been really wanting to see it. BOTH of us had it on our bucket lists!!

We've been talking about seeing it in a pub for a long time now. We've seen UFC fights on the TV but never at any pubs or public places. He looked up the places that were having it and decided on the Grand Villa Casino in Burnaby. They have a pub there but it was packed and there was only standing room available. We did a bit of gambling and I won a few bucks and then we left to go to another pub.

We headed to Metrotown to the Station Square Pub. It used to be a club called Connections and we used to frequent it when we were a lot younger. I've stumbled out of there a few times intoxicated. lol. Lots of fun times! We thought it would be neat to go there again. We got really good seats and ordered some pub foods and a pint of beer for me. It was really great atmosphere at the pub and we got to watch the UFC fights on the big screen tv there. There was a few comments after the Shogun fight. One guy yelled "bullshit" pretty loud and some people seemed pretty upset and felt he got ripped off with losing the fight. We got to people watch also. There was an interesting couple there that I overheard on their date. Had a few laughs at the way the girl was treating the guy. I think the guy wanted to get lucky but she was making it very difficult for him.

I noticed a few guys checking me out. One particular guy was very obvious when he checked out my ass as I walked by. I was wearing my tight black pants which show off my ass. It felt great! I mentioned to Master that I notice more men checking me out now that I am a blonde. I got a bit tipsy after the second pint of beer. We spent a few hours enjoying the fights and food and drinks. It was a really great time!! This is the first thing that both of us can cross off our bucket lists!!

#530 -~~Watch a UFC fight at a bar or pub~~

Local interests:~~See a UFC fight at a bar~~

The fight was over and a band started up and we decided to leave. We had a great idea to go looking for a strip club. We have not seen the female strippers together in a long time and thought this would be a lot of fun. The evening was still young and we were both wanting to go somewhere fun. Mugs N Jugs is closed in New Westminster at the place we used to go. We had heard it moved to King George Highway so we headed into Surrey to go look for it. We were not able to find it and it turns out is near the Turf Hotel in Surrey. We had no idea! Makes perfect sense though considering the location. That is a very rough part of town in Surrey. I'll have to add that to the bucket list though to go see the female strippers with Master. He's promised me we'll have a night out doing that sometime soon.

We drove around a lot of our old hangouts and blared 80's music from our car. It felt like a bunch of punks driving around looking for trouble. The sounds of Billy Idol and ACDC filled the car. It was so much fun driving around the streets and checking out all the old places we used to go to. We eventually wound up at Tim Hortons to get some donuts and had a really good talk about the good old days. We got home around midnight and spent another hour talking before finally going to bed together. It was a really fun night!! I really love date nights with Master and this one was a very special one for me. :)

I am so excited that Halloween is just around the corner. Next weekend should be a lot of fun! I can't wait!! I am planning on going to a Dead Sexy Queer woman's play party with a good friend of mine next Friday. That should be pretty interesting. We also have a family night planned at our home with our children for Halloween on Saturday. This is my favorite time of year! I am putting up a picture that Master took with our camera yesterday. Autumn is here and so is Halloween! Leaves are on the ground and there is a chill in the air. We even had some fog around certain parts of the city. What are your plans for Halloween this year?

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

The Candycane chapter

2009-10-23T10:38:00.001-07:00

It's been a really difficult week for me. We had to tell our kids some very difficult news last night about their Grandma. Master's Mom is very sick with terminal cancer and that was hard to tell our kids. My heart broke and I feel very emotional with seeing my kids hurting. My son is drawing a picture right now for his Grandma to make her feel better. It's been a difficult week for several reasons. My life is changing fast. I feel like a new chapter is starting in my life.

I found out some really exciting news today. It gave me a smile when I didn't think that anything would. My old friend, C (Master used to call her Candycane) is pregnant with her 4th child!! She wanted to share that piece of good news with me. Candycane and I were best friends in high school (BFF's) and during our early 20's. We have a hell of a history together. *Really* wild times!! Candycane was reckless and crazy. She tried to run over boyfriend when she found out he cheated on her. I was in the car and seriously thought she was going to kill him. There were really WILD parties in our 20's!! We spent a lot of weekends together drinking Bacardi Rum and cokes. We moved closer to her and her ex husband back in 2001.

I would go over and spend the night at her and her husband's house. They had an air mattress and we would get hammered and sometimes some very sexual things would happen. There was plenty of kissing with C and making out for the boys. (Master Anakin and her husband) I had a real serious crush on her brother. Boy that guy was a total hottie! I always hoped I might wind up in the sack with him one day. It is too bad I wasn't blogging during that year. I would have been able to write some really fun adventurous blog posts for you.

One night was particularly wild. A threesome almost happened. C and I were doing shots and then the dirty dancing started. We were bad to the bone. Very, very naughty girls. Kissing and hands were going everywhere. Her husband watched us and got hard. Then he started fucking her right in front of me. *whew* That night was crazy. The next day we both went on a date to see her lover. I could never understand how she was able to keep 2 affairs going as well as a marriage. Eventually it caught up to Candycane and the "perfect marriage" (she used to say to me that she had the perfect marriage) ended in total destruction. Her husband packed up his bags one night and left her.

Her husband and her had a pretty messy divorce. I couldn't handle the drama. The parties were out of control. I had to eventually walk away from the friendship because it felt like things were out of control. I had gained 20 pounds and the partying was starting to take over my life. I didn't talk to Candycane until recently. She e-mailed me just after my Dad passed away. Her Dad died in a tragic accident and she wanted to pass along her condolences. E-mails were exchanged and we've gotten back in touch with one another.

She has been really supportive of me during difficult times recently. Her Grandma is not doing very well and either is mine. We've been leaning on each other a lot. I was really happy to hear her good news today. She's been talking about having a coffee together sometime soon. Maybe it's time to see her again. I think our lives have changed a lot. We've both gone through some very challenging things in our lives. It tends to bond two people together. I think we both toned down the partying. Don't get me wrong. I still like to party once in a while but it's not all the time like it was when I was younger. We are both in our 30's and have moved on from that chapter of our lives with the partying. I am glad for the memories but am happy that we are able to be there for each other during difficult times recently.

I feel like I owe Candycane a lot. She was the one who encouraged me to tell Master my feelings. She saw that we were soulmates. She believed in our love. She supported me during our affair when a lot of other people turned their backs on us. She has shown me a lot of support during the most difficult times of my life...problems in my pregnancies, miscarriages, my divorce, my car accident, deaths, and many other things. She encouraged me to pursue my dreams of a life with Master. I'm very grateful for that. Who knows where my life would be right now if that had not happened.

She is now married to her one lover. It's kind of interesting that I am also married to my lover also. Master Anakin was the other man in my first marriage. Who would have thought that her and I would have wound up divorced and remarried to our lovers? Strange. I believe Candycane and I will be friends until the end. We may sometimes have a bend in the fork of our friendship but we always wind up back together again. It's funny how some friendships are like that. They are meant to be forever.

It's amazing to me that it's been almost 20 years since I was in high school. What happened to those wild crazy years? I wouldn't trade them for the world though. They are a big part of my history. I have been doing a lot of reflecting about the past lately and also life. Maybe this is a midlife crisis. Maybe it's due to the events of 2009 so far. I lost 3 Aunts. One of them committed suicide. Then I lost my Dad very suddenly. Then I found out my Mother-in-law had terminal cancer. My Grandma isn't doing very well either. This year has been challenging and nothing has worked out the way I thought it would. I had no idea that my old friend, Candycane would come back into my life after we were apart for so many years.

I just want this year to be over. I need something to look forward to. I have many dreams and I wonder if I will be able to reach them. The journey is a dark one sometimes but there is always light at the end of the tunnel.

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Happy HNT - Sexy Goth Schoolgirl

2009-10-21T19:20:00.000-07:00

Happy HNT everyone. I wanted to share a picture of My slave in the sexy Goth School costume she wore to the Rascal's BDSM event last weekend. I think she looked really hot in her red schoolgirl skirt, sexy goth boots, and skimpy white schoolgirl top. It was so hot to play with her at Rascal's. I lifted her short schoolgirl skirt and gave her one hell of a spanking with my briefcase full of hurt. She writhed in pain, I comforted her, kissed her on the forehead, and did it all again.

Be sure to click on the picture to enlarge it for a better look. Happy HNT everyone ; please leave us a comment! Please check out Osbasso's blog if you are interested in participating in the HNT series.

May the Force be with you.

~Anakin

A wild and fun weekend with Shasta and Master Anakin!

2009-10-20T11:27:00.001-07:00

I have been trying to figure out a way to write this blog post. I had a really terrific and fun weekend but the fallout from the weekend hasn't been too good. I am hesitant about what to write. This blog is very public and lots of people can know my feelings. It makes me feel very exposed emotionally. I want to try to be honest about my feelings but I also don't want to create a lot of drama by doing it. It's hard for me to blog about events also.

Some people have talked to me about privacy while at Rascal's. (or other bdsm events) At a lot of bdsm play parties and events...what happens there, stays there. I used to talk about details a lot more but some people have had a problem with it. I also plan to leave some details out of this blog post because I'd rather keep some things private. Here is a summary of the weekend:

...

We dropped off our kids at around 7 pm on Friday night. Master decided to take me out for dinner to Swiss Chalet. We had a really delicious dinner and then headed to to the movies to see ZombieLand. The movie surprised me. I thought it was a really good movie. I enjoyed it with Master. We went home and had some quick sex and he gave me an orgasm before bed. I fell asleep quickly but got up very early with insomnia. I was really excited about seeing my best friend, Shasta. I could not sleep. It took a lot of work to get back to sleep until 8 am.

We got ready and drove out to the skytrain. I could tell that Master was excited about meeting her also. There was a certain atmosphere of energy in the car heading to pick her up. She texted us and we picked her up before heading to the local mall. I got my make-up done and also my eyebrows waxed. OMG! My eyebrows were so sore!! She did a really great job on my make-up. I felt very pretty afterwords.

Shasta enjoyed some shopping while I got it done. Then we enjoyed a coffee together. It was really wonderful to finally be able to share one in person with her. Master had twittered about us "getting into trouble at the mall" and we both shared a giggle about that. How much trouble can two sexy sex bloggers get into at the mall? *smiles*

We headed back to our place and had a visit there and I showed her around the house. I did my nails and we both figured out our costumes and packed up our bags for Rascal's. Everyone was very excited about it! We got in the car and headed out to downtown Vancouver. I wish the weather had been better. It was pouring rain and sometimes it was so heavy that streets were flooding. I wore my sandals which wasn't a smart idea. My feet were so cold by the time we got to Rascal's.

We took her to the Vancouver Lookout first. It's the same place I took Daemon last year when we had our special romantic date together. I think it's a beautiful place to take tourists or people who have not seen the Top of Vancouver before. It was Shasta and Master Anakin's first time there. They took lots of pictures. I spent a bit of time off on my own. I lost myself in flashbacks at certain times. I kept picturing Daemon there and us cuddling and kissing as we looked out at the city. It made me feel a bit of sadness during a few moments there. I'm glad that I was able to go back though and create a new memory there.

We drove Shasta around Stanley Park after the Lookout. It's a great way to show tourists the city and one of the biggest and most popular parks around Vancouver. It started to pour rain though. Yuck! It's a much prettier park in the sunshine. Shasta and Master both enjoyed taking pictures around the park. We parked near Denman Street and looked for an adult store which we had seen before. I had wanted to take Shasta there. Unfortunately it seems to have moved.

We went to a fabulous sushi restaurant on Denman street. They had just opened and had a discount and it looked like a good one to try. We ordered the Sushi boat. OMG!! It was sooooo good!! We all shared a lot of laughs and enjoyed the dinner together. We drove around a bit and then went to Little Sister's bookstore on Davie Street. I looked at toys but decided to wait until Rascal's to buy one. I knew that "bound2please" vendor was going to be there and I knew there might be better toys to see there.

We got to Rascal's and went inside to get changed. I wore my blue wig and schoolgirl skirt, fishnets, goth boots (borrowed from Shasta) and white sexy top. I had also picked up a beautiful goth necklace to go with it. Shasta was the pink girl in her pink wig and tutu and looking very sexy! We were ready for Rascal's! Master wore his suit and looked very handsome!! He looked and smelled (with his axe cologne) very nice. Shasta and I got our drinks and enjoyed a vodka/7 and some giggles and I started cuddling up to Master a lot. Master seemed a lot more relaxed this time at Rascal's. I think because it was his second time and he was more familiar with it.

We went up to play first in the private area. He used all the toys from the toy bag. He used the pinwheel first to tease my nipples and skin. Then he got me to lay down on the table and he retrained me using blue and white rope. OMG was my ass sore when he was done with it!! He spanked me with his belt, paddles, leather, whips....you name it!! Ouchies!! We decided to cut our play short because I had assumed (which I shouldn't have done) that I was going to be playing with someone else. That didn't happen unfortunately. I asked Master if he wanted to play in public and was surprised when he agreed!

He had bought a new toy from the vendor for my birthday. I put up a picture of what that toy looks like! It's got a rough side and a smooth type of side. It's a pretty wicked little toy! I was really surprised when he agreed to play in public. I know he's a bit shy about that and I was really happy to have that experience with him for the first time. We went over to the spanking bench and he put me onto it and got me to raise up my schoolgirl skirt and started to spank me.

He used the Anakin's paddle and new one (for my birthday spanks) many times and a few strokes made me cry out and also call him a few names. lol. He can be a mean old man! Of course he gave me stronger strokes and I noticed him stopping the play a few times to clean up a few blood drops. We played very heavy that night. You can see the bruises that were on my ass in a picture I put up yesterday. My ass has not marked like that in a long, long time!! It's STILL got bruises on it from the play on Saturday!! and my ass does not mark like that usually! Ouchies!! That's what I get for playing with Darth Vader!! :)

We came home and ate our cupcakes (Shasta and I bought one from the Cupcake store) and headed to bed. We got up and ate breakfast (Thank you Master Anakin for making it) and then to the Mall to pick up a few things before the beach. White Rock was fabulous!! The sun came out just in time to visit the ocean. Shasta had not been to an ocean in ten years. She looked like she really enjoyed herself. She walked along the shore and picked up shells and enjoyed the beach with us. We all enjoyed the ocean air and atmosphere down in White Rock. I really love going there!! It's one of my favorite places in Vancouver.

We had delicious fish n chips from Docks Restaurant. We enjoyed lunch and started to head back to the car. I wanted that day to last forever. It felt surreal to be down at the ocean with my two favorite people enjoying a beautiful sunny day there! It was so nice being there with Shasta and it was hard to start heading to the airport. I noticed the car was quiet sometimes. I think we all were feeling a bit sad to see the weekend end. We came into the airport so I could use the bathroom and we also had some Tim Hortons together. Master seemed happy to watch the airplanes taking off.

We said goodbye to Shasta and I got emotional. It was hard to see her go. I am not sure when we can see each other again. It was such a small amount of time together and we had squeezed so much into that weekend. I didn't want it to end. We got in the car and I cried most of the way home. It was *very* hard to come down from the weekend. I could barely get out of bed yesterday and went to bed at 7:30 pm. I've been feeling very emotional and sensitive the last 48 hours. Sometimes it's taken me a week to come down from events. This time around is a bit more difficult because of what has happened with other people. The last few days have been stressful.

....

I am glad that my best friend came out to visit and it was a really fun celebration with her and Master Anakin. I really hope we'll all be able to do it again one day and be able to all hang out together. I want to thank both of them for making my birthday very special for me.

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

My birthday spanking at Rascal's!!

2009-10-18T17:46:00.001-07:00

It's been a really exciting and wild weekend! I am having a really hard time coming down from all the excitement and trying to get back to normal life again. Yesterday was a really amazing day for me!! I have lots to blog about and many pictures to share. I will try to write about it soon. There is lots to share about all our fun adventures. It was so much fun to see my best friend again and spend a great time together. It was a birthday to remember!

Rascal's was incredible and very memorable. I have so much to share about my experiences last night and also play time. I got to play for the first time in public with Master Anakin!! It was truly amazing and I've got a lot of marks and bruises to remember last night. We played very hard and took a journey to the darkside. My bum is SO sore!! I am putting up a picture of what my ass looked like when we got back from Rascal's. Ouchies!! It is very sore to sit on today. It was a great birthday spanking at Rascal's! I will blog more in another blog post about all the adventures this weekend with Shasta. It was amazing and I'm so glad I got to spend my birthday celebrating with my two favorite people and all my friends at Rascal's! :)

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Rascal's Halloween party tomorrow night!

2009-10-16T11:50:00.000-07:00

It has felt like a very long week for me even though we had a Thanksgiving holiday on the Monday. There has been a lot going on in my life. New people have entered my life recently. I met my half-brother on Monday for the first time. There has been some recent interest in a few people and possibilities for the poly. I've been getting some new friendships and possible relationships too.

I've have also had some people from the past come back into my life. I have a really hard time dealing with ex's. I tend to put a lot of myself into my relationships with other people. When I love, it's completely in my heart and soul. My heart has been broken more times than I can count during all these years of being in a poly relationship. I've seen my Master's heart broken too. It hasn't been easy.

I haven't been to a bdsm event in the local community in Vancouver since March. I was on a hiatus for a long time. There were several reasons for my hiatus which I don't feel like blogging about. I started to get the itch to go to an event though in the last two months. I missed seeing some of my friends and also being able to get out and socialize. There are several reasons that I love to go to events. I am really excited to be meeting some of my new friends at Rascal's tomorrow night!! There are some people that I can't wait to see again. It's been months and I have missed them a lot! There are some people through Fetlife that I've gotten to know online but we have not had the chance to meet yet! I can't wait for that!

The guest list for the Rascal's Halloween party tomorrow is pretty big. I'll be honest. There are a few people that are planning to go there that I would rather not see again. The problem with dating people in the local community is that you play with people and get some very powerful feelings about it. Then you break up and sometimes there are hurt feelings. You are forced to have to see them and to deal with them when they are at events.

You try to be civil but it's tough sometimes. There were some people who really broke my heart and hurt me deeply. I loved them very much. The past is the past and I'd rather not see them again or dig up old feelings. You never know who might walk through the door at an event. I've been shocked when ex's from years ago have shown up at different places unexpected. It can be emotional for me to see those people again when I've closed the door on that chapter of my life.

I get a lot of anxiety when I am meeting people for a coffee for the first time. Meeting 20 or 30 new people all in a night causes me a bit of a panic attack. I can be social but I'm also extremely shy when I meet new people. It's a bit of a miracle that Master Anakin is going because he gets into even more of a panic when he's in a crowd. He has some social anxiety disorder. He doesn't like to socialize very much and would rather have home play parties or go to more private ones together. He does a lot better when he's in a smaller crowd. He also does not like to play publicly. If we play tomorrow night, it would be in the private area of Rascal's.

There have been a few problems with finding a costume also. I went back to Spencer Gifts to pick up my sexy cop costume but it was gone in my size. Bummer! I was hoping to be a sexy cop. Then Master saw a prisoner costume he liked and we also went back to get it and it was all gone!! We are still trying to figure out a costume for him to wear. I know that is making him angsty as well. I had planned to go shopping today but it didn't work out. So we might have to go looking for a costume after we drop off the kids tonight for sitting.

Don't get me wrong. I am very excited about this weekend. I get to see my best friend, Shasta again. It's been a year and a half since I last saw her! We have lots of neat plans for her and a great weekend planned including some beach/ocean time! I spent the last two days cleaning and my place is sparkling! Master is very pleased with me about that. I am counting down the hours until I see my BFF again! That is the best part of this weekend! I get to celebrate my birthday with my two favorite people!

I've also been told that I can buy a new toy for my birthday!! That's very, very exciting! I am not sure what to get but it's going to be so much fun to look! We have a few plans for naughty shopping and I can't wait! We have plans for sushi for dinner and sightseeing to show Shasta around Vancouver. That will be SO much fun!! We have no kids from 7 pm tonight until Sunday afternoon. We are not sure of our plans for tonight but I'm really glad to have some time with Master. I really miss him today. I will be seeing Shasta in the morning before we visit and get ready for Rascal's and downtown Vancouver. I hope this rain can turn into some sunshine before tomorrow!

It's going to be a fun weekend. I just need to work through some of my panic and angst and get into the spirit of the weekend fun. I know that usually after events I am so glad that I went. Getting in the door is usually the most challenging part of going to events. After that, there is usually lots of playing and fun and great times! :)

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

I'm the birthday girl!

2009-10-14T12:00:00.000-07:00

It's hard to believe that I am 37 years old today. What happened to the years? I can remember going out with my friends to celebrate my 19th birthday. It seems like yesterday. I can remember turning 30 and thinking that was old. LOL! Now I'm creeping closer to 40. I was told by my Doctor that I am "pre-menopausal" now. What the hell happened? It feels like the last few years have especially gone by quickly. My kids are growing up so fast and I am starting to notice a few little changes starting to happen with my body as I approach middle age.

It's been a pretty amazing journey for me so far. I've squeezed a lot into the last 37 years of my life. I am glad that I have not been afraid to try new things and to try to live life to the fullest. This birthday is going to be a great one! Much different than the disappointment which happened last year when my boyfriend at that time (Daemon) stood me up for a birthday dinner that I had. It was a bit of a disaster. This year I plan to celebrate my birthday at Rascal's on Saturday night. I'm going to have two of my favorite people there to help me celebrate. My best friend, Shasta is coming to Van today and plans to come to Rascal's with Master Anakin and I. Rascal's is having their Halloween play party this weekend.

We've been planning a very special day on Saturday to celebrate it. I've got plans to get my make-up done and then visiting with Shasta before we head downtown. We plan to do some shopping at a few of the amazing stores down there. Master has told me I can treat myself to a new toy for my birthday. We plan to have dinner (hopefully Sushi somewhere. Sushi..nom nom nom!) downtown before Rascal's. Rascal's is going to be a blast!! I plan to see a few new friends there as well as people I have not seen in months. This will be the first play party I have gone to in months. Shasta also told me that she hasn't been to a play party in a while! So that's going to be a blast for us both!! I can't wait!!

I've been told that there is a birthday spanking coming to me also at Rascal's! I am not sure what Darth Vader's evil plans for me are but I will be packing lots of toys for him to chose from. I'm planning to go as a Goth Schoolgirl for my costume. Master is hoping to dress up like a Prisoner. I am sure there will be plenty to blog about and lots of fun adventures! The Rascal's Halloween party was one of the best events that I went to last year and I know this one will be just as great! I'm SOOOO excited!! :)

Happy birthday to me!! I am 37 years old today and plan to celebrate my birthday this weekend! Lots of fun times ahead...

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Love our Lurkers Day 4

2009-10-12T15:55:00.000-07:00

Bonnie started Love our Lurkers day and it was a such a big success that she is doing her fourth year of it and we are going to be participating! Master Anakin and I are hoping that it will convince some lurkers to come out of the shadows and say hello and leave us a comment. I know the last few years we participated we got a lot of comments and we heard from many people we had never heard from before. This is your chance to speak up and tell us what you think about Journey to the Darkside. We would really love to hear from you! We appreciate the feedback and really enjoy hearing from our readers. :)

Your comments mean so much to us. I try very hard to respond to all of them but sometimes there just isn't enough time in the day to respond to each and every comment. I read them all and we both appreciate the feedback and time it takes to leave a comment here at Journey to the Darkside. We would really love to hear from you today!

Please leave us a comment. I will beg if I have to...you can use a fake name or a real name. You can be someone who comments regularly or someone who hasn't commented in months or years or maybe never. Just please come out of the shadows today and say hello and pop your head out. We'd love to know who reads us and who enjoys Journey to the Darkside and we would love for you to say hello.

Thank you to everyone who has been there for our journey and for all your comments and support. It means a lot to us and we really enjoy hearing from everyone. Thank you for joining us on our journey....Our Journey to the Darkside!

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Happy Spanksgiving

2009-10-11T08:49:00.001-07:00

It's been a really fun long weekend so far for me. Master and I spent Friday night and also several hours playing last night. There was a lot of spankings, orgasms, and great sex!! AND we took pictures of it too! Woot! I will try to put some of those up in the next week. I dressed up as a naughty schoolgirl yesterday and we did a very sexy scene together. I've got a very sore bottom after two days of playing!! I will write a blog post about that very soon! :)

Master Anakin and I wanted to wish all our Canadian readers and friends a very HAPPY SPANKSGIVING! Err..I mean a happy Thanksgiving. lol!! I know it tends to sometimes confuse the other readers when our Thanksgiving is on a different day and even month as other people in different countries but we celebrate ours this long weekend. Tomorrow is our Thanksgiving day here in Canada and we've got plans to eat lots of turkey and pumpkin pie. It's very special this year and I am very grateful for a few different things.

#1...it's my birthday on Wednesday!! I turn 37 years old. We often combine the holiday of Thanksgiving and my birthday together. We celebrate with the family tomorrow. I am very glad that my Mom is cooking and hosting it this year. I have several birthday plans through the week with different people. I've also received a few cool gifts already!! Happy birthday to me!

#2...I am meeting a half-brother for the first time in my life. I was told when I was younger that my Mom had given a son up for adoption when she was a teen. She recently found him and they have established a relationship together. I get to meet my older half-brother tomorrow for the first time during our Thanksgiving dinner!! I feel like this is a bit of a miracle. That she was able to find him and that he lives close by to me and even has a son that is close to my age!! What are the chances?? I am VERY nervous about meeting him but also excited too.

#3...my Dad's estate is about to be settled. I will be glad to close that chapter and it might help me with trying to accept his death. This Thanksgiving will be sad for me with having lost my Dad a few months ago. I may try to visit his grave today and wish him a Happy Thanksgiving in my own way.

#4...I have a very big birthday planned for next weekend. My best friend, Shasta is coming into Vancouver and we plan to go to the Rascal's Halloween party with Master Anakin. I've been told there is a birthday spanking coming to me at that time. I don't remember the last time I had a big celebration for my birthday. I am treating myself next Saturday including getting my make-up done and also am trying to figure out my costume for it. I am thinking I might dress up as a goth schoolgirl. There are a few people who plan to come to Rascal's who I have not met yet. I'm really excited about it!!

This next week is going to be a bit crazy but also fun and wild with everything going on. Thanksgiving and family plans, my birthday, estate stuff getting settled and a really fun evening planned with my closest friends at Rascal's!! I can't wait!! :)

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Great Reads

2009-10-09T09:49:00.001-07:00

I got a recommendation from Kitty Unleashed for a "great read" award. Thank you so much! It was my first time to her blog and I read her blog posts and then linked to her. It's always good to find a new blog to read. I am supposed to make a list of 10 blogs that are great reads and I enjoy reading. There are lots of blogs that I read on a regular basis so it will be difficult to narrow it down to just ten of them. Please don't be upset if I don't chose your blog. It was hard for me to pick just ten of the great reads for me. Please check out their blogs to read their great reads!!

In no particular order...

1. Shasta Gibson

2. A spanking good time

3. Doc

4. This girl

5. lil girl and her Daddy

6. Diary of a sex addict

7. Galen's view

8. Sapphire's view

9. Danae Whispering

10. Alebeard's kink blog

If your blog is listed: post a entry of your award and who nominated you along with your great reads!!

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Happy HNT - Relaxing in the warm sunshine

2009-10-07T15:10:00.000-07:00

Happy HNT (Half-Nekkid Thursday) everyone! I love this picture and think it's a perfect one to put up today with it being so sunny and nice out here in Vancouver, BC. My birthday is just around the corner and sometimes it's been rainy and gross out. Sometimes I get lucky and there is sunshine on my birthday. October can be a mixture of weather patterns.

I am glad for the sunshine that we've been having lately here in Vancouver. I love the feel of the warmth of the sun. I could spend hours sitting around in a nude beach if I could all summer. I love the relaxing feel of sunshine on the skin. I was laying around one afternoon in just my thong and stretched out by my window to feel the sunshine coming onto my body. Master took this picture of me and I'm sharing it with everyone today for HNT. Click on the picture to enlarge it and get a better look at it.

There has been a lot happening lately that I could write about. I've decided to wait until another post for that though. There is a lot on my mind and it's been a very interesting day so far. I've got one week to go before I'm 37 years old!! I have not made any plans for my birthday yet but I think I'm going to celebrate it next Saturday when I go to Rascal's for their Halloween party. That way I can celebrate it around all my friends and also Shasta and Master Anakin. I can't believe how close it is!! It's all coming up so fast! This weekend is our Canadian Thanksgiving and long weekend. Almost time for turkey! It should be interesting. I'm meeting a half-brother for the first time and am a bit nervous about it all. There is a lot happening in my life right now.

Please leave us a comment on the picture. We'd love to hear from you. Please check out Osbasso's blog if you are interested in participating in the HNT series.

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Meeting my blogger friend, this girl

2009-10-06T15:18:00.001-07:00

It's been a pretty interesting day for me so far. I got to meet another blogger friend of mine for the first time!! I admit that I was really nervous about it!! I spent most of the morning getting ready for her visit. I was glad that Master gave me permission to use the Hitachi and enjoy myself. I was able to masturbate and relieve some of my stress and tension. I am not sure why but I get extreme anxiety when I meet people for the first time. It almost feels like a panic attack. I'm fine once I get to know people but that first meeting brings out all my anxiety. I was soooo nervous about meeting her but also excited!!

I got to meet "this girl" and her Dom, Grimly. They are both visiting from England. She's got a beautiful English accent and is soooo pretty!! She wore the sexiest red dress I've ever seen. Wow!! She was smoking hawt!! She also had on sexy stiletto shoes to go with the outfit. Her and Grimly came out to my place with a friend, JG. I've e-mailed JG a few times and have been getting to know him. It was really nice to meet him also.

this girl had some big news! She showed me her engagement ring that she was wearing! Grimly proposed to her during their visit in Vancouver!! Congrats to her and Grimly. They are a really cute couple and I could feel the force between them. I'm so happy for them both!

We had a brief visit at my place and then headed down to the local A&W for some lunch. We had a pretty interesting discussion during lunch. I always find it kind of amusing to talk about kink at restaurants like A&W. Especially where we live. It's a pretty conservative type of city and people act pretty shocked if they hear the word "spank" or "bdsm" from another table. lol.

I really enjoyed the lunch and meeting them all. I wish we could have had more time to visit. I had to get a drive back to pick up my son from school. I said goodbye and gave Grimly a hug and then "this girl" a kiss on the cheek. I have to confess that I considered kissing her on the lips. She's so beautiful and sexy! *blushes* But I wasn't sure if that was ok and wasn't able to be that bold. I'm way too shy sometimes when it comes to other girls. :)

It's always neat to meet other bloggers. It's always interesting to be able to put a face to the name. Speaking of sexy bloggers... I am really excited about my best friend, Shasta's trip out to Van next week! She's my best friend and I met her through our blogs. I flew out to Ontario to spend a few days with her. Now she's coming to Van! We have a lot squeezed into her time here. We have plans to show her around Vancouver and take her to the Rascal's Halloween party and also beach time too! I've got some other plans which could be interesting in the next few weeks. We'll have to see what happens. This month is going to be a lot of fun and plenty to blog about!!

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Razor Stropping

2009-10-05T20:19:00.001-07:00

I used our authentic vintage razor strop on My padme's sassy bottom this weekend. I tied her wrists to the bondage bed and then stropped her ass hard. I used the strop to warm up her bottom in preparation for the other evil implements that I would use that night. There is nothing better than giving My slave a good old-fashioned stropping ; I wonder if the old strop was ever used in such a wonderful, traditional manner. I certainly hope so.

May the force be with you.

~Anakin

Playing on the darkside last night

2009-10-04T12:16:00.000-07:00

You know it's been a good night when everything is sore in your body and it's because you've gotten a really good beating. My pussy, ass, back, thighs, and tits hurt all over. Master was very cruel to my body last night. He made me suffer for him. We got to play on the darkside and we took pictures!! I wanted to post a few and also blog about it while it's all still fresh in my mind.

We got a surprise overnight yesterday. It was unexpected and we got several offers of places that we could go. Someone in the bdsm community was having a play party for her birthday and we were invited to go. MVK was also last night. Even Libido Lounge was hosting a naughty play party. We talked about the options but Master wanted to stay in and play alone. He didn't think that he could hurt me the way he wanted if we were out in public. He wanted to take me shopping first before our overnight began and play time on the darkside.

We went shopping for Halloween stuff. We went to the dollar store and I picked up some new Fishnet stockings for the Halloween party at Rascal's. We also went by Spencers Gifts and I drooled over a few of their costumes there. I saw a sexy cop costume which looks awesome and it was in my size!! Master says we might go back today and buy it!! I think that would be so sexy with the boots that I'm borrowing from Shasta and the fishnets. I also have a military type of hat to complete the outfit!! We also went to Value Village to look for costumes. Master has a few ideas of what he wants to wear also!! It's going to be fun!!

We picked up some sushi from a new place in town. We came home and I took a long hot bath with a bath bomb from Lush. It was sooooo relaxing!! I started to really get into the mood for romance and fun!! I put on make-up and also a new wig that Master bought me at Value Village. It's blue shimmering and made me feel very sexy and erotic. I put on my schoolgirl skirt and white top and red heart panties and girlie socks. I came downstairs and dinner was set out on the table and waiting for me. Master took a picture of it which I'm sharing with the blog today. :)

Dinner was delicious!! I love sushi!! We enjoyed some drinks and then put on some music and a porno afterwords. We laid out the toys and he brought up our fold out bed which we inherited from my Dad. Master calls it the bondage bed because it's easy to tie me to. He put it in the middle of our livingroom. He plugged in the Hitachi and got the room all set up for play. Candles were going and the room had a lot of atmosphere. The techno music helped to put me in a bit of a trance. I got a quick OTK to warm up my ass. His hand spanked me building up a rhythm. He took out some rope and then took some pictures of me. Then he blindfolded me and tied my wrists to the frame of the bed.

He flogged me with the suede flogger It was a very long flogging building up the intensity. He untied me and let me take a brief break and then was ordered to remove my top. He flogged my back as well as my bottom. He also used the crop on me. We have an older crop which was one of our first toys we ever bought. It's well worn and he used it on me harshly. I couldn't move because of the bondage. I just had to take the pain and survive the punishment. He was brutal with that crop!! He drew blood in several spots on my ass and thighs.

I would scream out and he would say "silence" in a very firm tone. I just had to accept and surrender to the pain. He told me that the hard cropping was a part of my punishment that I had coming to me. He used his belt on me as well as his whip too. I lost track of time and floated into a very deep subspace. He would pinch my ass as well as scratch it. This would be the most intense feeling and I would float even higher in endorphin heaven.

He made me turn over so I was laying on my back at one point of the evening. He tortured my nipples and got me very wet. I wanted him BAD!! I needed him to fuck me. I begged for it and he untied me and then took off my panties and started to finger me. He made me beg for it and then plunged his hard cock into my pussy. It was very rough sex as he pulled on my hair and hit me from behind while fucking me. He took his cock out of my pussy and then started to fuck my ass. This was a very punishing ass fucking. He took his time and used my ass hard. Ouchies!! It's still sore today from that ass fucking.

I came for him after the ass fucking. He used the Rabbit vibrator in my pussy and the Hitachi on my clit. He threatened me with very bad things as he built up my orgasm and finally allowed me the pleasure. I squirted all over. This is the second time that I have squirted and it was messy!! I'm cleaning the sheets today. lol.

I fell asleep naked in his arms. We woke up this morning and he decided that he wanted to do more play. I was cropped again and spanked hard. He also used the belt on me more. This really hurt because my ass was very bruised from last night. The sadist in him wanted to hurt me. My ass is soooooo sore right now!!! I feel deeply submissive in my soul right now.

He made me cum again and my pussy swelled up from all the use this weekend. My pussy is also very sore!! He used that rabbit on my pussy so much and made me orgasm over and over again. I didn't think I could cum again but he made me. He pushed my limits and took me to the darkside. The Darth Vader side of Master came out to play. He interrogated me and forced orgasms from me. I was bound to the bondage bed for an hour this morning. I was naked and wearing my hood. It was humiliating and it really turned me on!! My pussy feels like it's throbbing right now from soreness but yet arousal.

The journey to the darkside has been amazing!! I seem to get more masochistic when he is sadistic and cruel to me. When the mean old man comes out to play!! I told him today that he has taken me places that no one else has. I am curious to see where the dark road we are taking will take us next...

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

A surprise overnight

2009-10-03T11:09:00.000-07:00

I have been having this need in me for days now. A need to be beaten. A need to be used and abused. A need for a spanking and some discipline. A need for him to take me to the darkside. Thoughts of dark fantasies and dungeons occupied my mind all day long yesterday. I was horny and really needing Master. I was a bit of a bad girl. I snuck some Russian Vodka which was in our freezer. I needed a drink.

It was Friday and I wanted to party! So I poured a shot into my drink without asking permission. I broke another rule and I twittered about it! LOL! Not the smartest plan. He's on twitter and reads all my updates. He read my confession on there and wasn't too pleased with me and I got into big trouble. It seems like lately I've been getting into lots of trouble. I spent most of the week grounded and doing chores for him.

There is a physical punishment and domestic discipline coming my way also. I've been very nervous knowing that it's coming. Tonight is going to be the night! We found out that we got a surprise overnight!! Leia is going to a sleepover at her friend's house. Skywalker is staying with the in-laws. So we have a while night free with no kids!! I am not sure exactly of our plans tonight but I'm waiting until Master comes home so we can talk about it. He's out right now and asked me to write this blog post for him. He is curious about my thoughts.

My thoughts are very dark right now. All I can think about is pain. I want to take as much pain as possible for him tonight. I want him to push me to my limits and then keep going. I want to bleed for him. To take a very hard spanking and be punished harshly. Maybe he can put me into bondage before he punishes my ass? *Pretty please Master*

I want him to hear my moans and screams and to keep going!! I want to play with Darth Vader tonight. I want to be interrogated by him. I want to get tortured by him. I want to serve and obey and submit to Lord Vader tonight. I hope he will take us both to the darkside...it's my favorite place to be.

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Happy HNT - Bat on my boob!

2009-09-30T10:57:00.000-07:00

Happy HNT (Half-Nekkid Thursday) everyone! I found this erotic picture in our archives and can't believe that I have not put it up before. I think it's erotic but also kind of cute!! Click on the picture to enlarge it and get a better look at it. It was around Halloween time and I had put a small bat temporary tattoo on my tit. I was wearing Master's white shirt with no bra and he got me to show off my one boob to him and took this picture. You can see how erect my nipple was. I don't remember what had me so excited but I'm sure it had to do with Darth Vader being a mean old man!! :)

It is almost October and my favorite month of the year!! There are many plans for Thanksgiving, my birthday, Rascal's Halloween party/Shasta's trip out to Vancouver, and also Halloween! I'm hoping to maybe schedule a few play dates also or perhaps even a coffee with a friend or two. I am expecting my Dad's estate to be settled by the end of October also so that will be nice to have a big cheque come to me right before the holidays. October is going to rock!! I love the Fall season and all the spooky things about Halloween.

I think I've figured out my costume for the Rascal's Halloween party. Master is still trying to figure his out. I'm really excited to start going to events again in the local community and I remember how much fun the last Halloween Rascal's was!! It's going to be a blast!

Please leave us a comment on the picture. We always love to hear from you. Please check out Osbasso's blog if you are interested in participating in the HNT series.

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Grounded for being a mouthy slave

2009-09-29T10:55:00.000-07:00

I got myself into trouble yesterday. I really should know better after all these years of being a slave. I have a truly submissive heart but I am prone to stress and PMS and all those other emotions that women get. I was having a bit of a bad night yesterday. My period had started and I was still getting over my cold. I started getting snappy at Master as soon as he was home from work. I didn't have dinner ready on time and he was not too happy with me. I got some Melatonin from my Mom last week. I've been taking it daily to help me sleep and it's been working. I didn't tell Master about it. I guess I thought it wasn't really a medicine because it was bought in a herbal store instead.

Master caught me taking one last night and got very upset with me. I'm supposed to tell him about any medication that I take. It's one of my rules. I tried to excuse it away but he is right. It's still a sleeping aid and I should have asked his permission before taking it. Especially with my family history. My Dad was very addicted to sleeping pills. He was taking about 7 strong prescription sleeping pills a night to sleep at the end of his life. I've got to be careful because I seem to have inherited my Dad's chronic insomnia problem from him.

He ordered me upstairs and I got cranky. He warned me that there would be consequences if I kept pushing him farther. I didn't listen to him and then he told me that I was grounded until furthur notice. I have not been grounded in a while. I was pretty surprised. I am not allowed to leave the house unless it's to and from the school to get my son. I was also punished by going to bed at 8 pm. He sent me to bed early!! He also laid his belt out on the nightstand so I could fall asleep with it nearby. I know what that means.

I woke up to a big chores list also which must be completed by the end of the day. And he also mentioned in his note that there is a punishment spanking coming to me also. He told me that he used to put up with me being bitchy but he doesn't anymore. He's a mean old man and that's the way it is. We have a TPE (Total power exchange) relationship which involves Domestic discipline. Consistency is very important to Master and I. I like that he is strict with me. That he is so controlling. He likes to control me and I like to be controlled. It works well for us and we both get off on it. He is a mean old man and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I admit that it's really turned me on today. Thinking of him isolating me. Grounding me and forcing me to stay inside and work on chores for him. Also thinking of what's coming to me...the true punishment spanking. I get nervous about it but I know that it will get me wet in the end. That's how it usually goes.

My submissive soul is yearning for him today. I want to be locked away, not just grounded. I want to be in a cage...awaiting my punishment...hoping that he will be cruel and mean to me because I need it...I want it!!

My force runs through my Master. The force between us is strong.

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala

Bite me like a vampire

2009-09-28T16:35:00.000-07:00

I have been looking in the mirror today at a big bite mark on my neck. I got it during some rough play on the weekend with Darth Vader. He was pulling my hair and looking deep into my eyes. He said "I'm going to bite you like a vampire" and he bit down on my neck. It left a pretty big bruise. I am really into erotic biting. I have a bit of a fetish for it.

There is something so erotic about the bruise that it leaves and the feeling in my erotic soul. I've always had a fascination with vampires and that dark side of life. Leia has recently taken an interest also in the vampire books and movies. Twilight is her favorite movie and she has the posters and has read the books and talks about Edward Cullen. We plan to see the new movie when it comes out. She seems to be into the vampires just like her Mom. lol.

Master has been trying to think of a Halloween costume for Rascal's next month. I was thinking today that he would make a very handsome vampire! I would love to see him in that costume. Then he can bite me all over as well as spank me!! Mmmm...I love the thoughts of that!! :)

May the force be with you all!!

~padme amidala