What would you see if you looked in my backyard? A sandbox, a patio, some trees, a garden, a shed, some room for the kids to run, and a fence to keep them from running too far. At least, that’s what you’d see at first glance. But if you looked closer, you’d see more.

Upon closer inspection, you would see that the grass is patchy. The retaining wall is leaning. The tree branches that are hanging precariously over my neighbour’s shed need to be cut back. The shed has a bees’ nest in the top and a chipmunk house in the bottom (they made their way through some rotten wood). Yes, there are some things in disrepair.

Right now there are weeds that need to get bagged and some grass seed that needs to get spread. There’s lots to do. Some of it isn’t done because I’ve prioritized other things — and I think it was wise. On the other hand, some of it isn’t done simply because of bad decisions and some measure of irresponsibility on my part.

If you come into my backyard, you’ll see my weaknesses and my shortcomings.

The Thing about Backyards

The thing about backyards is that they’re in the back. No one sees them unless we let them. Most of the time front yards look much nicer, because that’s what we want people to see.

It struck me the other day that when we talk about ‘celebrity pastors’ we’re essentially talking about ‘front yard guys.’ They are guys who, because of their stature, can only be known to their followers by what they put forward for public consumption. If John Piper misses mowing his lawn for a week, no one will know.

Backyards and the Training of Men

For years I had the incredible privilege of training for pastoral ministry under the mentorship of Paul Martin (who, by the way, actually takes care of his backyard quite well). He was a man who willingly and deliberately opened up his life to me as a young man. He let me see his ‘backyard’, his shortcomings and his mortification-still-in-progress. If I’m honest, I think that’s where I grew the most in my respect and admiration for him and in my awareness of the seriousness of the calling.

As I’ve watched him honestly tackle his weaknesses and grow in grace I’ve learned many important lessons about being a Christian, a man, a husband, a father, and a pastor. I learned to grow as I watched him grow. It was in the ‘backyard’ that I learned what it means to bring life into submission to Jesus.

If you are a pastor — or just a mature man in the church who desires to mentor younger Christian men — let me admonish you: Let men into the backyard of your life. It will be good for you and it will bless them immeasurably. Resist the urge to keep guys in the ‘front yard.’ Let them see how you wrestle through the unfinished business of your spiritual life and they will grow.

Young Men and the Backyards of Others

Young men in our day flock to celebrity pastors. Why? The other day I did a quick survey in my mind of all the young men in our church. To my knowledge, of the guys around my age, only about three (3!) had solid Christian fathers who loved their mothers and were involved in their life. The Christian fathers of the past generation all disappeared, but men still need men to look up to. And in a world where cultures create celebrities, the vacuum has been filled by famous pastors.

There is up-side to that. Men like Matt Chandler, CJ Mahaney, John Piper, Tim Keller, Don Carson, Mark Dever (the list goes on and on), are good Bible teachers who love Jesus and can point others to him. But there is a downside, too. You’ll never see their backyard.

If you are a young man — or a man of any age who is seeking to go into ministry — let me admonish you: Don’t cheat yourself by getting ‘mentored’ from afar. Find a man, a local man, whose backyard you can examine, and be mentored by him. Take initiative, ask him to teach you, open your life up to him. Ask him questions. Get to know his strengths and his weaknesses, and watch as he grows (1 Tim 4.15).

I promise you, the more you get into his backyard, the less you’ll need the ‘front-yard-only’ guys. And you will be blessed.

Post from: Julian Freeman

Why Backyards Matter

No related posts.

Satan Desires Discontentment

Satan’s desire for mothers is the same as his desire for all women. He desires to create discontent in the roles that God has assigned. That is what Satan did in Eden, by approaching Eve first. And according to Paul (1 Tim 2.11-15), that is what Satan was doing in the early church in Ephesus. And you can rest assured that’s what he’s doing today.

God has designed women to be wives and mothers in order that they might reflect God himself, in whose image they are created. But Satan wants to create discontent with all of it so that the image of God is marred and belittled.

There are many ways Satan still works to create discontent in women — even Christian women — today. Here are two:

1. He says you’re too good for mothering

He tells women that the ideal is to get a degree, be a professional, and shatter the glass ceiling. The idea of being a wife and a mother is good for some or perhaps for a time, but the idea of being forever identified as a wife & mother is clearly not for you. The idea of letting a husband ‘lead you’ is so far beneath you it’s inconceivable, and having your identity be something bound up with your husband and your children is degrading.

When he creates this kind discontent, he has won. Just like in Eden, this rising up will result first in frustration, and ultimately in being brought low.

2. He says mothering is too good for you

Satan's lie: mothering should be one continuous string of 'mommy & me' moments

In recent days it seems that our culture has shifted somewhat. Gone are the days (seemingly) when mothering is bad and career is good. Now we have entered the days of ‘Super-Moms’, where mothering is not for the faint-of-heart.

Simply feeding your children is not enough. You have to make your own food, according to all latest health crazes, and you have to prepare them as ‘dishes’ like the chefs on TV. Just clothing your kids appropriate to the weather is not enough. You have to clothe your children just right so that they can be the appropriate fashion accessory for you.

Making sure your children are educated is not enough. You must choose carefully between classical education options, homeschool options and private school options; but you must find something that will make your child excel beyond the others.

Reacting to a generation of moms who were perhaps not involved enough, the pressure now is to engage your children in all manner of special activities from the time they are birthed. Yoga, painting, music, exercise, and who knows what else(!) all become ‘essential’ for good moms. Though previous generations knew nothing about these things, they are apparently now essential for a child’s brain development or emotional and relational health.

And whatever you do, if you are a good mom, you must make sure you get it all on camera so you can post the pictures on Facebook and the ideas on Pinterest to let everyone know you’re keeping up. Plus, you should probably earn some income (at the very least, open an Etsy shop) to prove you’re not inferior to the women around you who hold down jobs.

And on top of that you must make sure that your body looks the exact same as it did before having children so you can be a ‘yummy mummy’ like the real housewives of wherever.

Subtly, but powerfully, Satan communicates to women that all these are essential to good mothering. And when you can’t keep up, you get discouraged and discontent. And in that moment, Satan wins.

God’s Desire Is the Answer

So what is the answer to all these lies and temptations from Satan? That’s what I think Paul is getting at in 1 Tim 2.15; a way to be ‘saved’ through the temptations of Satan. (He argues similarly in 1 Tim 5.14-15 with regard to widows avoiding the temptations of Satan.)

1. Mothers must cling to the gospel too

Paul says, ‘she will be saved through childbearing — if they continue in faith and love and holiness, with self-control.’ The continuing in ‘faith and love’ is expressive of Paul’s own testimony (1 Tim 1.13-14). In other words, if mothers are to be content, they must do the same thing that the apostle Paul did: believe the gospel of love which has overflowed to them in the grace and mercy of God. Even more than being a mother, their foundational identity is ‘Christian,’ beloved of God in the gospel.

They must cling to this to be firmly grounded, immovable when Satan tempts them to discontentment.

2. Mothers must be content with their God-assigned role

When Paul says ‘childbearing’ in this verse he is using short-hand to refer to the whole role of ‘marrying, bearing children, managing the household’ (1 Tim 5.14). This role is to be the main occupation of the wife & mother; it is what she was created for. The one who created her desires her to be grounded in the gospel and content in this role in order to be delivered safely through Satan’s temptations.

Being content in this role is where the ‘holiness’ of 1 Tim 2.15 is found, through persistent ‘self-control.’

Post from: Julian Freeman

Satan’s Desire for Mothers

Related posts:

1. It’s Sexism As a man who lives with and cherishes his wife...
2. The Story of the Bible as Told Through Motherhood It occurred to me the other day, in preparing for...
3. This Friday is for the Ladies Recently I’ve come across three articles that I find particularly...

In Creation & Fall

God created and ordered the world — and it was good. But one thing was not good: Man was alone. So God created the helper suitable for him who would be not only his wife, but the ‘mother of all the living’ even before she had children (Gen 3.20). Once this ‘mother’ was created and given to her husband, creation was ‘very good.’

Of course, the downfall of humanity came when the one who was created to be mother took on a different role, was deceived, and led her family into transgression.

But God was not done with this woman and was not content to leave motherhood unredeemed. Rather, in the very context of pronouncing his judgement on motherhood (Gen 3.16) he also pronounced that the role of motherhood was going to be blessed with the privilege of redeeming all of humanity and all of creation (Gen 3.15). Through this mother would come the one who brings true life to all those who will truly live.

In the Old Testament Narrative

The narrative of Genesis unfolds as a fulfilling of the blessings and curses of God as the seed of the woman is forever opposed by the seed of the serpent. The climax of the stories in Genesis surround the wives of the patriarchs and their inability to bear children. If the women can’t become mothers, the whole plan of God falls apart. But each time God intervenes and gives children to the mothers so that his plan of redeeming the world continues through them.

Midway through the Old Testament, in Psalm 131, the psalmist reflects on God’s dealings with his people in order to call his people to ‘hope in God both now and forevermore.’ Do you know what he appeals to? The best image he can think of to display the trustworthiness of God is the image of a weaned child with his mother. As a weaned child has learned to trust and to hope, so the people of God should trust and hope in their God (Ps 131.1-3).

Similarly, as Isaiah reflects on God’s purposes in judgement and redemption and calls God’s people to trust in his good will and the deliverance he will bring, he compares God’s care for his people with that of a mother for her children. ‘Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you’ (Is 49.15). They can know that God will have mercy and remember to redeem his people because his compassion for them exceeds that of a mother for her children (the highest earthly example).

Jesus would bring this theme to light again when he is about to come to the end of his earthly ministry. In Matthew 23.37 Jesus stands looking out over Jerusalem and declares, ‘O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills the prophets and stones those who are sent to it! How often would I have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you were not willing!’ Here again, the compassion of God for his people Israel is compared to that of a mother caring for her children.

In the Coming of the Deliverer

In the opening two chapters of Luke’s gospel there is a strong emphasis placed on the theme of the barren woman miraculously giving birth to a child of promise: first Elizabeth with John and then Mary with Jesus. The reason is simple: we have reached the climax of this particular theme through Scripture, so its fulfillment must be highlighted. Paul reminds us of this very thing in Galatians 4.4 when he tells that Jesus, the Saviour, was ‘born of a woman.’ He is the promised deliverer, the seed of the woman, come to crush the seed of the serpent.

At the end of the Bible, in Revelation 12, John reflects on all God’s working in history through his people Israel and how Satan has opposed them and now continues to oppose the church. What is the picture that John chooses to use? The messianic people are pictured as a mother, with the entirety of redemptive history up until Christ as her period of travail in labour. Woman (together with man!) has been saved through childbearing (1 Tim 2:15), as  Jesus, the promised one, miraculously conceived, is finally born to save his people from their sins.

And that is the story of the Bible, through the lens of motherhood.

Post from: Julian Freeman

The Story of the Bible as Told Through Motherhood

Related posts:

1. Enjoying your Bible lately? How are you doing in your own personal study of...
2. Bible Reading Plan for 2011 Pretty much any Christian who has lived for a little...

You have to begin with identifying the sin. You can’t kill it, repent of it, or seek forgiveness for it without identifying it. One suggestion I received a number of years ago was to use the sin lists of the New Testament and try to identify my sin in biblical terms (Col 3.5-10 is one example). That’s helpful because the first step in fixing a problem is identifying the source of the problem.

But even if I’m able to identify that my tire is flat, that doesn’t fix my problem. It just helps me begin the process of fixing the problem. My wife Stacey’s post today was helpful for me as she pointed this out. I think far too often I find the flat tires in my life and then think I’ve actually done something productive. But I need to move from identifying the problem to correcting it.

When it comes to sin, there is no way for me to ‘fix’ the problem; but I must own my sin and confess my sin and again return to the cross, where Jesus has ‘fixed’ my sin problem. If I stop at identifying without moving to confessing, I’m not actually accessing the grace that Christ has purchased for me.

Stacey writes this about her own experience yesterday:

I had recognized pride in my life, but somehow in my identification of it, I forgot its vileness, its disdainfulness. When I looked at my envy, my pride and my covetousness, it was almost palatable. I gave it the right name, but that’s about it. I wasn’t recognizing it for what it actually was.

I’ve always prided myself (how ironic) on being able to identify sin in my life, but so often I forget that I need to confess it. It’s as though I’ve come to equate identification of sin with confession of sin. As I read Tim [Challies]’s biblical description of envy, my patient, longsuffering Father reminded me that I needed to go to Him.

I, so often, forget the value or need for confession. I’ve made my sins acceptable, not recognized them for what they really are, and I know that I’m forgiven for all of them anyway. Confession can therefore seem almost incidental—the mere dotting of an “i”.  Obviously this is patently untrue, but I know that I definitely minimize its value and necessity.

Read her whole post, ‘Called to Confess’, here.

As a sinner, I found this helpful. I hope you will too.

Post from: Julian Freeman

Identification is Not Confession

No related posts.

One of the many joys of pastoring is seeing Christians grow in their love for one another and in their unity of fellowship, despite various church backgrounds. What becomes apparent when Christians from different backgrounds get together is that depending on what kind of a church experience you come from, you may have a radically different understanding of the Holy Spirit and his work than some of your friends and fellow church-members.

Objective or Subjective Work?

Some of us tend to conceive of his ministry as more objective: his work is done to us. He regenerates, he gives faith, he seals, he protects until the end. That is glorious!

But for others of us, there is a tendency to conceive of the Spirit’s ministry in more subjective categories: his work is done in us. We feel his assurance, we’re equipped with gifts, we are prompted by his leading. And that is glorious too!

The reality is that the ministry of the Holy Spirit is dynamic. He is the Spirit of truth who opens our eyes and affects our hearts. He is the one who gives us life and sustains it. He brings our salvation and completes it. He is intimately involved in us because of what he has done to us.

To the Word

So, in Ephesians 1, Paul glories in the objective work of the Spirit:

In him you also, when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed in him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit , who is the guarantee of our inheritance until we acquire possession of it, to the praise of his glory.

He is a seal objectively placed on us; that is our new reality and the certainty that we have of our salvation. Praise God!

But the Psalmist, in Psalm 35 reflects on the present subjective work of the Spirit, assuring him that God is for him: “Say to my soul, ‘I am your salvation!’” Or, as Augustine personalized the prayer,

Whisper in my heart, ‘I am here to save you’

In Our Worship

I love the way Wesley captures that balance of the objective and subjective work of the Spirit in these two verses of ‘And Can It Be?’:

Long my imprisoned spirit lay,
Fast bound in sin and nature’s night;
Thine eye diffused a quickening ray—
I woke, the dungeon flamed with light;
My chains fell off, my heart was free,
I rose, went forth, and followed Thee.

Still the small inward voice I hear,
That whispers all my sins forgiven;
Still the atoning blood is near,
That quenched the wrath of hostile Heaven.
I feel the life His wounds impart;
I feel the Saviour in my heart.

So does the Spirit work in objective ways or subjective ways? The answer, of course, is ‘Yes!’ and ‘Amen!’

I’m so thankful to the Triune God for the way he has orchestrated our salvation to display the glories of his grace. He has determined that he would save us in such a way as to show off the glorious ministry of his dynamic Holy Spirit.

Post from: Julian Freeman

The Objective-Subjective Spirit

Related posts:

1. Gleanings on the Spirit from Acts I don’t know if you’re anything like me, but if...
2. The Holy Spirit It’s a funny twist of providence that I paused my...
3. The Primacy of Praise to the Father Sunday’s post reminded me of something that Dr Ware taught...

Musically speaking, the album is more eclectic than we’re used to from Sovereign Grace. These songs sound distinct from each other and different than previous SGM releases. At first I wasn’t sure what that would mean, since I’ve enjoyed many of Sovereign Grace’s recent albums. But this one stands apart.

Lyrically, this album is rich. The songs glory in the dynamic interplay of God’s transcendence and immanence and the majesty of the eternal God who revealed himself in the suffering servant.

Spiritually and emotionally, this album is gripping and engaging without being cheesy. I am amazed at how well the individual songwriters did at matching the musical elements to the lyrics so that the climactic points of the music serve to make the words even more worship-compelling.

I want you to hear this album so badly I’m embedding it below so you don’t even have to leave the page to hear it.

Worship leaders, you will serve your church well if you give this album a good listen and use what you can to lead your people to the God who is our song ‘from age to age.’

Post from: Julian Freeman

Modern Hymns for the Church

Related posts:

1. Why Singing Music from Sovereign Grace is Better Than Singing Hymns I also thought about titling this post: Why Stephen Altrogge...
2. Why Singing Hymns is Better than Singing Contemporary Worship Music Okay, it is time to re-establish some equilibrium in the...
3. Sing All the Verses! I don’t know why, but for some reason over the...

We proclaim a message with the power of God to change people, but we can’t even change ourselves. We call others to perfection, as Jesus did, but our lives are full of imperfection. We must shepherd like the Shepherd though we’re just one of the sheep.

We seek to make Christ increase (though he’s invisible to human eyes) as we seek to decrease (though we stand in plain view week-by-week). We say numbers don’t matter, but long for many to be saved. We labour to grow the church, even though we realize each soul increases our accountability before God.

We try to express the Infinite and Eternal in 45 minutes or less; obviously we fail, so we try again next week.

We spend our lives studying a book that we’ll never fully grasp and we labour to explain it to a people who can’t understand apart from the work of a third party. The more we study, the more certain we become of the wisdom of God and our own foolishness; and yet we must preach on.

We are told that not many should be teachers and that there will be stricter judgement for those who are, and yet, we cannot fight off the compulsion to preach. We call people to something they can’t do, with an authority that is not our own, and then at the end of our lives we give an account to God for the souls we pastored.

We are called to toil in the word of God and in prayer; yet there is nothing our enemy opposes more actively. We work to build a community where people are connected, while occupying an office filled with temptations to isolation.

We preach a gospel of joy, but preachers are hard pressed with temptations to depression.

We must preach with passion but pastor with patience. We must be gentle with the sheep and fierce with the wolves. And we must somehow discern the difference.

We must plead with people to repent and believe all the while knowing that it is God who must save. We plead with God in prayer until our wills align with his. We must earnestly seek the presence of the Spirit, knowing full well that he moves where he pleases.

We must labour with all of our strength but never, ever trust it. We are paid to satisfactorily do a job that never ends: When have I studied enough? When have I prayed enough? When have I mentored enough? When have I counselled enough? We who are never finished are called to lead others to rest in the finished work of Jesus.

Ultimately we labour and long for results that we can never achieve. Being a pastor is a lifelong journey to a place of utter dependence.

This is strange work, being a pastor. But I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

Post from: Julian Freeman

It’s a Strange Thing Being a Pastor

Related posts:

1. Please Pray for Your Pastor Back at the end of February Stephen Altrogge wrote a...
2. Don’t Pastor Like Adam This should go without saying, but we must not pastor...
3. A Competent Pastor? What makes a pastor competent? What is it that equips...

Of course, what they are revealing should be something other than flesh. Christian women, rather than having ‘covering up my body’ as their goal, should have ‘revealing the gospel’ as their goal when they pick their clothes each morning.

The warmer weather is upon us again and the spring outfits are about to make their return. So I thought I might be able to serve our church by offering a little reminder to Christian women everywhere to pursue modesty for the sake of revealing the gospel.

Here are two truths Christian women can use to connect the gospel to modesty in their attire:

1. In the gospel, Jesus gave up his rights & freedoms for the sake of serving

Philippians 2 relates how Jesus had rightful claims to deity and honour, but denied himself, took on humble appearance, and in humble behaviour subjected himself to obedience and servitude for the sake of loving those who were weaker. That’s the essence of the gospel.

In a similar way, Christian women can follow Paul’s example of gladly giving up their freedoms for the sake of serving those who are weaker (2 Cor 9) because it displays the gospel. Just like Jesus didn’t ‘grasp’ to what was rightfully his, Christian women don’t need to fight for their rights to wear whatever they want.

They can reveal their Christlikeness as they give up their rights to wear whatever they want, in deference to others who are weaker.

2. In the gospel, Jesus veiled his glory for the sake of serving

When Jesus took on human flesh, his glory was veiled. It had to be, otherwise we would die. In order to serve us by living a holy life and dying in our place, he had to veil that which was beautiful (for a time, in a context) so that we all might be able to behold the one who is True Beauty in time. For the sake of the gospel he hid what was good for the sake of serving others.

In a similar way, Christian women can veil the beauty of their more intimate parts for the sake of serving those who are weaker because it displays the gospel. We must never think that the call to modesty is a call to cover up because there is something dirty about a woman’s body — nothing could be further from the truth. But just like Jesus didn’t reveal all of his beauty in inappropriate ways, Christian women don’t need to fight for their rights to flaunt their beauty; they can save it for the more appropriate and ultimately God-pleasing context of intimacy that is to come.

They can reveal their Christlikeness as they veil their glory for the sake of serving.

A balancing note

Since the conversation about modesty can often quickly degenerate into quarrels about words and opinions, I wanted to draw our minds back to the word specifically (think 1 Tim 2 and 1 Pet 3). The last thing we ever want to do is add to the word of God and bind peoples’ consciences in ways that the Bible doesn’t.

So what does the New Testament actually say?

What Paul and Peter both emphasize is this:

1. Don’t dress like the wealthy / influential / sexually immoral people of your day, since that belies your commitment to Christ rather than the world
2. Don’t dress in such a way as draws more attention to your body than your works as a godly woman
3. Don’t dress so as to gain standing or approval of people
4. In all things, love for God and love for others is the greatest single commandment we have, and needs to inform our clothing choices.

So where are the lines?

I honestly and earnestly mean this with all my heart: If a woman is seeking to carefully obey those four directives, then I think drawing more boundaries than that is unhelpful. Christ commands us to love and gives us his Spirit to discern what that means. The word of God, prayer, and counsel of other believers (along with a healthy dose of self-distrust) are your best friends beyond that.

Those of us who are tempted to draw boundaries and rules for others and condemn others for their freedoms need to remember that to go beyond what is revealed in the Bible would be playing God (aka becoming a pharisee) to bind peoples’ consciences in harmful ways. If we want to be practical about modesty, perhaps the most helpful thing we can do, rather than talking about hemlines, is talking about heart motives. We need to focus on what it means to love, since that is the single greatest commandment of all.

To the bottom line

So how revealing should a Christian woman’s clothing be? It should be very revealing. It should reveal her chastity, her good works, her servant-hearted humility, and her love for others that refuses to make much of self.

But most of all, it should reveal the gospel that saved her and owns her; a gospel that rejoices in the giving up of glory and freedoms for the sake of loving others. A woman’s clothes should — and will — reveal her God.

Post from: Julian Freeman

How Revealing Should a Christian Woman’s Clothes Be?

Related posts:

1. The Mozambique Christian Book Ministry Fund It hasn’t really hit me until recently just how much...

Here are three posts that I think are worth your time if you’re a wife and / or a mom (or if you’re married to one).

1. Should How Eternity Shapes Our Mundane

This post is by Gloria Furman on the Desiring God blog. This post is for moms (particularly those with young children).

Children grow up so fast, don’t they? Not a day goes by when I don’t say this to myself or hear it from someone else.

But I don’t always live like this is true; I suffer from bouts of parental amnesia.

Parental amnesia is not just where you walk into a room and forget why you’re carrying the laundry basket with four dirty coffee mugs in it. That’s called normal. Parental amnesia is where we forget about two things: tomorrow and eternity.

First, we forget that Lord-willing our children will grow up to be adults. I have a hard time imagining my 5-year-old as a 35-year-old or a 65-year-old. Her big goals right now are waiting patiently for her first loose tooth and learning to tell what time it is. Sometimes I think she’ll be five forever and do five-year-old things forever.

Second, we forget that our children are more than just potential adults. They are people made in God’s image and they have eternal souls. When the mundane looms larger than eternal life we forget who God is, who we are, and who our children are.

Read the whole post here.

2. Put Off Nagging, Put On Love

This is another post by Gloria Furman, this time on the Gospel Coalition blog. This article is more about the husband-wife relationship.

To Do Lists can be a beautiful thing. But sometimes things get ugly when you become a slave to your To Do List. What’s worse is trying to put shackles on your spouse and make the To Do List their master, too.

One way I try to share my To Do List chains is by nagging.

When I say nagging I am not talking about how I might lovingly mention to my husband that he probably shouldn’t eat that entire cheesecake in one sitting because I can hear his right subclavian artery crying for help.

When I say nagging I mean the stereotypical, habitual, manipulative complaining that we women often try to justify as “reminding.”

…

Nagging is neither patient, nor kind, nor respectful. It’s impatient, rude, and demeaning. Nagging is not loving; it’s your garden-variety sin. My friend’s attitude toward nagging changed when she saw how her sin offends our holy God and denigrates people made in his image God.

Read the whole post here.

3. Your Children Want You!

This post is written by on a non-Christian site, but the battle for identity, sufficiency and contentedness is definitely one that many Christian women I know can relate to.

There’s this crazy phenomenon going on right now. Good, devoted mothers get on Pinterest . . . and blogs . . . and Facebook . . . and Twitter . . . and then they flip through parenting magazines and TV channels (full of advertisements and media hype) . . . and they’re convinced they’re not enough.

They’re convinced that everyone else has magnetic, alphabetized spice containers, and unless their garden parties are thematically accessorized with butterfly lanterns, and they’re wearing the latest fashions (in a size two, of course), there’s no point in even showing up for the day. Last Saturday, this happened to me.

I came home from a lovely day out with my extended family and had serious intentions to spend the evening dyeing Easter eggs and making bunny buns.

By the time I got everyone settled and fed, however, I was so tired that I just laid on the couch and dozed while my children played and got themselves to bed.

Around 8:30, when I finally had the energy to sit up, I decided to try out Pinterest for a few minutes until my husband got home. There it was–1,000 reasons why I’m failing at all things domestic.

I don’t make grilled cheese sandwiches look like ice cream. I don’t even have seasonal throw pillows on my couches or live plants anywhere in the house.

Is it really so hard? Can’t I pull myself together and wrap some candles in green foliage and bring happiness to our decor with bright fabrics and hand-crafted photo frames?

…

There’s something deeper going on in family life than can ever be expressed on a social network. Whatever it is we feel we are lacking, can we collectively decide–as deliberate mothers–that we are not going to sit around feeling discouraged about all the things we’re not?

Can we remind each other that it is our uniqueness and love that our children long for? It is our voices. Our smiles. Our jiggly tummies. Of course we want to learn, improve, exercise, cook better, make our homes lovelier, and provide beautiful experiences for our children, but at the end of the day, our children don’t want a discouraged, stressed-out mom who is wishing she were someone else.

Read the entire post here.

Post from: Julian Freeman

This Friday is for the Ladies

No related posts.

One of our girls thought that ‘merciful’ might be her favourite, but she wasn’t sure what mercy was. So we tried helping her understand the difference between mercy and grace. DA Carson talks about the difference between mercy and grace in this way:

The two terms are frequently synonymous; but where there is a distinction between the two, it appears that grace is a loving response when love is undeserved, and mercy is a loving response prompted by the misery and helplessness of the one on whom the love is to be showered. Grace answers the undeserving; mercy answers the miserable. (Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount and Confrontation with the World, 24-25)

Now, of course I didn’t cite Carson to my four year-old. But we did try to show her that grace and mercy are both expressions of God’s goodness to those (like us) who don’t deserve to know his goodness and couldn’t help ourselves. I think they got it.

So I asked them, ‘What are some ways that God has been merciful to us?’ I expected the usual Sunday School answers (‘Jesus!’) and not much more. What one of my daughters said, though, really gave me cause to pause and consider. She simply said ‘He spoke.’

I don’t know why, but for some reason, the notion of God’s mercy being expressed by the simple fact that he has spoken struck a nerve. If mercy is what answers the helpless and miserable, then God’s special revelation (his giving us the Bible) is mercy indeed!

Without the Bible we know that God is powerful and that we’ll be judged by him (Rom 1.18-20), but it is God’s word that gives us a knowledge of him that will save (2 Tim 3.15). Without a God who speaks, we couldn’t be saved. We wouldn’t know what to preach or what to believe if God hadn’t revealed it to us (Rom 10.14).

Without God speaking, we would know enough to be condemned, but not enough to be saved. That’s the definition of helpless — and it sets us up to receive his mercy, as we receive his communication at his initiative.

Of course, the ultimate display of God’s mercy is the giving of his Word, Jesus Christ, the divine communiqué par excellence. He came to show us that of all the ways God could speak, the grandest and fullest way is to send his Son (Heb 1.1-4). In his Son he has displayed his mercy finally and completely by speaking and revealing himself to those who could not know him otherwise. And in the life, ministry, death, and resurrection of Jesus for sinners, we again see mercy.

And this all gloriously blows my mind because it’s like looking at your reflection in a mirror on another mirror — you know that effect where you can see 8 or 9 of you? God’s act of speaking is mercy, but the content of his speaking is mercy as well.

So how do we know God is merciful? My daughter couldn’t have said it better: ‘He spoke.’

Post from: Julian Freeman

He Spoke

Related posts:

1. An Honest Look Into Our Family Devotions Okay, men. Let’s talk family devotions. Feel guilty yet? There...