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Drink with God 2021 With Xiumin English Sub

2021-07-06T04:33:00.004-07:00

A TV program that recommends drinks and recipes to accompany drinks while listening to stories and concerns sent in by viewers.

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TV Show: Drink with God

Country: South Korea

Episodes: 10

Aired: Apr 9, 2021 - ?

Aired On: Friday

Content Rating: 15+ - Teens 15 or older

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15 ways to make money online | Make Money in 2021

2021-07-03T04:17:00.009-07:00

If you ain’t got money and looking to get started from scratch this Article will help you.

it’s not about taking online surveys or begging, it’s the real deal.

For those of you who have some money already lined up, by the end of this Article you’ll probably identify your next investment or at least get the confirmation that you’re making the right call.

Here are15 ways to make money online, easiest ways to make money especially if you already have some!

15 ways to make money online | Make Money in 2021

Number 1: Crypto

Crypto is more than Bitcoin & Ethereum and the entire industry is super hot right now.

By far the easiest way to make money this decade is to simply buy some bitcoin and ethereum and literally not do anything else but hold it for the next 5 to 10 years.

If you’re more tech savvy and understand the space a little bit, you can even diversify your portfolio of holdings into potential Defi, Oracles or Infrastructure projects.

Our picks would be: Cardano, Chainlink, Polkadot and Uniswap. Stay away from Dogecoin or ShibaInu.

Number 2: Trade Stocks

This is where things can fluctuate based on how much money you actually have.

Have a lot? Go with an index fund and play it safe.

The S&P500 is probably your best bet to make money sustainably and long term.

If you’re feeling like you’d rather risk it all than play it safe, look into Leverage trading.

Who knows, maybe you’ll get lucky going diamond hands on one of those meme stocks.

Number 3: Real-estate

Governments everywhere are printing a ton of money and flooding the economy with it.

Prices are already climbing and they will continue to do so for at least the next 12 to 24 months.

If you’ve got money laying around and want a safe bet,

BUY PROPERTY! It’s the obvious hedge against inflation and after the prices stabilize we will see the aftermath in the raise in rents, so that’s gonna be life-long cashflow.

Pro tip: look for apartments that used to be used as small offices.

Since everyone works from home now, those are selling under the market value.

Clean and up, turn them into residential apartments and you’re ready to cash in.

Number 4: Venture Capital

Something you probably don’t know is that you don’t need billions of dollars to become a venture capitalist. Thanks to everything happening in the age of the internet, you can now invest in early stage companies from anywhere in the world.

Our recommendations would be: angelist, microventures and seedblink. Or just google

venture capital crowdfunding and the name of your region. Plenty of options should come up.

Basically, you and other people come in together and invest in an early stage company. In return, you own a % of that company.

If in a couple of years that company becomes highly profitable or gets acquired, you make bank.

ways to make money online

Number 5: Teach online

So you’ve made a little bit of money..

Did you know you can teach others to do exactly what you did and get paid for it?

Use some of the money to buy yourself equipment and offer a consultancy service. Costs are pretty

minimal, you’re able to do it from a laptop and basically from anywhere in the world.

Online courses are great - and ohh boy we know something about online

courses! [put courses.alux.com on screen] - but teaching live is a way

more engaging type of approach and your clients will get more value out of it.

Number 6: Buy Low - Sell High

The more we think about it, there more we realise that:

Every business out there is in the buy low sell high business!

Everyone is looking to arbitrage between cost of purchase and cost of sale.

Find anything that you can flip for a higher amount and you’re golden.

Pro tip: we recently became aware of how big the resell gap is for old furniture. People go on craigslist or flea markets, buy old furniture, give it a fresh look and resell it for profits.

Someone we know made over $100,000 just by doing this on the side last year.

Number 7: Uber - the smart way

Now that we’re no longer stuck inside, uber is booming as a business, but before you brush us off as you did

with the articles you read before ending up here take a moment and hear us out.

What small investors do is that they buy cars and have people act as drivers.

Drivers get a paid a wage + a percentage of the earnings and the investor keeps the rest.

You can buy 5 cars and get 5 people to drive for Uber for you.

Because you’re not investing a lot of money to begin with, the operation can be scaled

until you can afford to buy real-estate or a bunch of crypto like real investors.

Number 8: Monetise your online presence

If you’ve got a little bit of money you either know something others don’t OR ar at least decent when it comes to sales.

Social media is the marketplace of today! So go out there and sell.

Build a community, engage with your followers and see how other people in your industry are cashing in on that exposure.

Instead of making other people rich by plugging their products, develop your own and keep all the profit for yourself.

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Number 9: Facebook Ads Online ads get crazy returns.

If you really know what you’re doing, you can get up to 30 to 50x returns on your spend.

Here’s the simplified version: find a product with as high of a profit margin as you can.

Pro tip: it should be at least 40%

If you go to alux.com/sell by the end of today you can have a full online store set up and you’re

getting access to 2 weeks of premium services because Shopify wants to support our community.

Put your product into shopify, you set up a payment system with PayPal or stripe and then

begin to promote your high margin product on the socials. It might require a few tests to figure

out which campaign gets you the best results, but once you do, you just keep those orders coming.

Number 10: Acquire production equipment and raw materials

We love robots and machines that can create value for you. Example:

a professional camera is a couple thousand bucks, but if you’re good at using it, you can earn back the money with it in a few weeks.

By far our favorite ones are vending machines. You simply buy them, restock them once a day and collect your cash. If you really wanted to, you could have one installed in front of your building before the end of the week.

It might not make you millions, but it’s passive income and easily scalable.

Number 11: Peer to peer lending

This is where you lend people your money and they pay it back with interest. Although it sounds very loan-sharky when you say it out loud, there are plenty of options where you can do this legally and online.

Just google peer to peer lending on google and we’re sure you’re gonna find several options that work in your are. Make sure to look into the project that you are funding and asses them based on the level of risk you are willing to take.

Make Money in 2021

Number 12: Rent on Airbnb

When we got started with real-estate this is the first thing that we did: we purchased two apartments in the city center, fully furnished them with a few of our interior designer friends and had them listed on airbnb.

This initial test run has proven the concept and if last year tourism was dead, ohhh boy it’s begun picking up some steam.

Pro tip: putting a pull-out couch in the living room increases the number of people who are able to book a place. It isn’t an elegant solution, but it will dramatically increase the number of views and guests you get.

Number 13: Become a silent partner in a business

Yes, this is similar to venture capital, but if that was done with an investment fund like approach where you probably split your investment across several companies just to hedge your bets this one is a little different.

We recommend talking to your super talented and hardworking friends.

More often then not, they are looking to expand their business and always in need of capital.

That’s where your money comes in. Become an investor and help them expand.

By being a silent partner, they have their say in the business and where the business is going.

We recommend becoming a silent partner because you can easily break friendships apart if things

go south. Instead, offer advice when needed and see if you can open more doors for them.

Number 14: Growing food

Yep, you heard us, we’re recommending farming to y’all. Hol’up, this is that new-age cool type.

You can now buy shipping containers retrofitted to become hydroponic farms,

where you basically grow greenery such as lettuce, basil, parsley, bok choy and so on.

The cost of electricity is pretty low and fresh greens are being sold at a premium in your local

supermarket. A single shipping container can net you over 80,000 dollars per year.

Freight Farms are the most well known of the bunch but there are many companies in this space with

different levels of tech associated with their containers. Look into it, we find it fascinating.

Number 15: Do more of what got you your money in the first place!

Statistically speaking, this is probably the highest return you’re gonna get for your buck.

You already know what you’re doing so use the money and reinvest it in your business or whatever you’re doing to bring in the cash.

Once you have enough you can look at all of these and see which fit you better.

Your goal is to increase your income to the point where you can confidently create new sources of income independent of your activity!

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i love catman 2021 full movie eng sub

2021-05-20T01:56:00.013-07:00

Catman (Korean Movie - 2021) ENG SUB Movie

Liang Qu is a chic, confident, and cold but charming half-cat, half-human. He became a catman when an older catman accidentally bit him while in the form of a cat, and it needs 9 years for him to go be human again, without someone knowing a secret and without falling in-love. His first love Miao Xiao Wan, is an honest woman who's created an app that translates cats' sounds and language, but unexpectedly brought massive problems since its release to the market. She then seeks help from Liang Qu, who is now a cat researcher.

i love catman 2021 full movie eng sub exo sehun

Native Title: 我爱喵星人

Also Known As: I Love Catman , Wo Ai Miao Xing Ren

Director: Park Hee Gon

Genres: Romance, Fantasy

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The Box (Korean Movie - 2021) ENG SUB

2021-03-26T01:37:00.008-07:00

A jukebox musical film about an aspiring singer and a washed-up music producer who used to be a big shot in the industry. Together, they embark on a musical journey that will be directed by Yang Jung Woong, the executive producer of the 2018 PyeongChang Winter Olympics opening and closing ceremonies.

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Watch The Box (2021) : Full Movie Online Free A drama about a young man aspiring to become a singer and a washed-up former hit producer.

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best iphone video editing app 2021 - No Watermarks

2021-02-28T08:22:00.003-08:00

best iphone video editing app 2021 - No Watermarks

While you may have needed an expensive computer to edit videos a few years ago, now you can make high quality content straight from your phone.

There are a ton of apps available on the app store, where you can edit and create beautiful videos. The problem is that not all apps are created equally.

Some apps promise a ton of features and end up under-delivering. While other apps you might spend hours on and edit the perfect video, when you go and hit that export button, the final product ends up with big Watermarks.

but I've done all the research. And in this article, I'm going to be going over the top 5 best iphone video editing app 2021.

I'm going to be going over the features, pros and cons of each of the video editing apps.

In order to keep things fair, I also set out a list of criteria that all of these apps must meet in order to be on this list.

free video editing apps for iphone

First of all, none of these apps can have any sort of watermark when you export the video.
Second, all of these apps need all of the basic editing functionality that comes with a video editor. So you have to be able to actually add the clips, cut them up, add text and export it all within the free version.
And finally, not everyone has the latest and greatest device. So I've tested it up to two generations prior to the latest one. which in this case is the iPhone XR and all the apps have to be able to work flawlessly on these previous gen devices as well.

best iphone video editing app - No Watermarks

1. Adobe Premiere Pro Rush

The first app on the list is Adobe Premiere Pro Rush. And I really like Adobe Premier Pro Rush because in my opinion, it has some of the best multi-layer editing available.

A lot of the apps on this list don't even have multi-layer editing, but from the ones that do this one does it the best and it makes it really easy to manage different layers and edit really high quality content in such a small package.

Within the free version of Adobe Premier Pro Rush, you get access to all the features you really need. You can add your clips, cut them, split them, add some effects, add texts, as well as all of the sound effects that you need. Within the free version, there are a couple of limitations. I believe that you can't export videos in 4K.

The highest you can do is 1080P 60 FPS, and you don't get access to all of the editing effects, but you can still do all of the basic ones.

And if you are a paying Adobe Creative Cloud customer, you do get access to the premium version of this app for free as well, which is something else to keep in mind, but all in all, whether you're a Creative Cloud subscriber or not, this is a great option if you want an app that's really good at multi-layer editing and has all of the features that you need, as long as you don't need to export videos in 4K.

2. VideoLeap

Next up on the list is VideoLeap App. And in my opinion, VideoLeap is the easiest app to use on this list.

And it's also one of the best apps for making videos that are simple and great for social media platforms, such as TikTok.

One of the reasons this op is really easy to use is because the user interface is super simple, but you can export videos all the way up to 4K in 60 FPS for free.

Once again, you get all of the standard features such as being able to cut clips, add text, as well as music, as well as some quirky features such as being able to add stickers.

But there are some limitations on the features with the free version. So within the free version, you can't actually add adjustments and tones to your video clips, but that's very minor compared to everything else that the free version gives you.

VideoLeap also has multi-layer editing, but it's not the best in its class. So I would say this is best iphone video editing app if you want something that's really easy to use.

As well as if you're planning to make videos for platforms, just TikTok and all you need to do is put some clips together, add some music, texts, maybe a voiceover, and then just call it.

best free video editing app for iphone

3. iMovie

The third app is probably one that you've heard of before, because it's made by Apple and it's iMovie. because iMovie is made by Apple and is available for free, you get access to all of the features within the free version, and you can export videos all the way up to 4K and 60 FPS.

And this is also the best optimized app for the iPad as well, partially because it's made by Apple. However, the kicker is when I say that everything is available for free, everything isn't necessarily a lot.

While you can make all the edits you need to, there isn't as many features and content available that you can actually put into your videos. So, first of all, iMovie high single layer editing, which is fine for most people.

And it can only be time consuming if you have to make a lot of cuts. But other than that, there's also not that many like a facts and soundtracks and types of texts that you can add to your clips.

So you are limited in that sense. However, I would say that iMovie is the best iphone video editing app, if you're looking for a simple video editor to make content that you're going to be either making for school or sharing with your friends and family, because it does have everything you need.

And there's also a lot of really cool themes available that you can use to make projects really quickly. And then you can make some really memorable content as well.

4. Splice

Next up on the list is Splice. And I would say Splice is the best free video editing app. If you're looking for the perfect balance between an app that has a lot of features, as well as an app that is fairly easy to use.

Personally, I was a huge fan of the way the app actually lays out all of your projects.

And I think it's the most efficient app when it comes to setting up a project and being able to access your files, you can really easily add the clips you need, set the ratio, and once all of that is set up, it makes it a lot simpler to add texts and other effects.

And once you're in the actual editor, it becomes really easy to cut your clips and put them together as well as add text and other elements. And the only kicker here is that in the free version, you can't access any of their music or effects.

5. GoPro Quik

And the final app on this list is GoPro Quik and GoPro Quik in my opinion is the most fun editor partially because it's made for footage that is taken by their action cams, but there's a lot of features that this application packs.

You can export videos and up to 1080P 60 FPS. And it has all of the basic features you need such as being able to add text and call your clips.

But there's also a ton of fun features such as being able to add stickers, speed up or slow down your clips or access their royalty free music library.

And on top of that, there's also a ton of different themes that you can use to make really fun clips that you can share with your friends and family.

So, GoPro Quik App is that it has the features you need to make YouTube videos and be used as a basic editor, but this app really really shines when you're creating content for yourself and you're using their packages and themes to create a piece of art that is very personal to you with all of the other elements as well.

how to make someone like you quickly

2021-02-17T05:55:00.015-08:00

8 Psychological Tricks To Make People Like You Immediately

For some people, making friends comes naturally. For others, not so much.
Everyone wants to reap the social rewards of being liked and accepted, but sometimes meeting new people is just plain awkward.

It can be a struggle to feel comfortable being yourself - while also making an effort to leave a good impression around new people.

If you’re someone who needs a little help with charming others, we’ve got you covered with these 8 proven psychological hacks.

They’ll ensure that strangers will receive you better when interacting for the first time - and they may even become friends.

You probably already know the basics - like putting on a smile, using open body language, and mirroring their gestures.
The following tricks go a bit further to make people like you even more.

how to make someone like you quickly

8 Psychological Tricks To Make People Like You Immediately.

1 - Listen Intently And Ask Questions.

When engaging with others, one of the most important things you can do is pay attention.
You can show that you’re listening actively by asking questions to engage the other person.
This does two things.

It tells the person you’re talking to that you think they’re interesting; and it takes the conversational pressure off of you.
When you direct discussion toward the speaker or their passions, they’re more likely to enjoy talking to you.

After all, people love talking about themselves and their interests.

2 - Earn Trust With Warmth.

What makes people trust you?
Less so than your true reliability or assets, warmth is a crucial factor in establishing trust.

Studies have shown that people are more open to trusting those who portray themselves warmly in a non-competitive and friendly manner.

This theory is known as stereotype content model.
It suggests that humans are more likely to judge people based on their warmth than anything else - even intelligence and financial status.

While knowledge and money can earn you respect, warmth will elicit trust.

3 - Highlight Shared Values.

Studies show that people feel closer to those who possess the same values and attitudes toward specific topics.

Known as the similarity-attraction effect, this phenomenon can help you become closer to people you’ve just met.
Search for opinions or values that you have in common with someone you’d like to get to know.

The easiest way to find similarities with another person is to ask about their background.
Maybe you’re from the same area or have similar family dynamics.

You might have enjoyed the same activities in your childhood - or even now.
When you emphasize similarity, you become more familiar to other people.

This sense of recognition sets the scene for an emotional connection by helping people feel more comfortable around each other.

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4 - Play The Name Game.

Have you ever noticed that people with a lot of charisma often use names in conversation?
You might think that saying someone’s name doesn’t make a huge difference, but you’d be surprised.

Think about a time when someone remembered your name when you weren’t expecting them to.
It’s a compliment in and of itself.

You probably felt a rush of positive emotions.
When people hear their name, they are automatically more likely to listen and feel seen.
The easiest thing you can do to make others like you more is to say their name.

You can make it a game: try to work their name into the conversation during the first five minutes of meeting them, and try to say it three times.

When you put in conscious effort to remember (and say) someone’s name, it shows that you pay attention and care about them.
It will help you build rapport quicker - and, it also helps you remember their name.

5 - Reveal Some Flaws.

We all know that nobody’s perfect, but some people still walk around as if they’ve never made a mistake in their life.

They probably don’t know about the pratfall effect - a psychological phenomenon which shows that others tend to like you more after you make an innocent mistake.

People like people who are authentic - and not being perfect is a part of life.
Experts claim that people who don’t hide their flaws are more likely to make a good impression.

Although you shouldn’t dwell on your mistakes, it’s okay to occasionally admit your struggles.
Others will find you more relatable, and they’ll be more likely to appreciate you.

6 - Make Eye Contact When Laughing.

When humans laugh, it reveals a level of comfort and vulnerability.
When someone gives an open and honest reaction of laughter, it presents an opportunity for a deep and meaningful connection.

The next time you’re with a group of people and the crowd laughs, pay attention to the person you want to like you the most.
Make eye contact as you laugh together.

Even a single instant of looking into one another’s eyes while laughing will help feed a strong emotional bond.
It creates a shared intimate moment.

7 - Display A Sense Of Humor.

Laughter is a fundamental building block of socialization.
It isn’t only the result of happiness - it’s a cause.

When you laugh, your brain releases chemicals that make you feel delighted and give you an enhanced sense of well-being.

If you can make other people laugh, you give them this emotional gift.
So, a good sense of humor will make other people want to be close to you.

That said, when you practice humor, you want to ensure that your jokes come naturally and work well contextually.
You need to be careful to avoid jokes that come off as forced or inappropriate.

8 - Be A Little Vulnerable.

It’s normal to resist being vulnerable around those you’ve just met.
People are more likely to hide their deepest fears and insecurities around strangers - and only open up to close friends or family.

Vulnerability is a sign of closeness.
However, when you completely hide your feelings, you promote inauthenticity - which is easily spotted.

It can make you appear fake and cause others discomfort.
Opening up to someone on the other hand, shows that you trust them, and it also makes you appear honest, courageous, and likable.

Being your authentic self, will not only cause other people to like you - it will help you build more meaningful relationships.

As you can see, being more likable isn’t about fitting into an image that you think others want to see.
People will gravitate toward you when you are unapologetically yourself - including your strengths, weaknesses, quirks, and qualms.

When you feel comfortable being true to yourself around new (and old) friends, you’ll notice that you not only become more likable, your relationships will benefit overall.
Remember that honesty and trust are essential in any human connection - no matter how small.

So, be yourself with the help of these ten psychology hacks.
When you incorporate these tricks into your regular interactions, you’ll be surprised how well others respond to you.

7 Signs if someone is going to betray you

2021-02-17T04:34:00.005-08:00

7 Signs Someone Is About To Betray You

Betrayal is something no one wants to go through - yet many people do. It can wreak emotional havoc, and take months, or even years, to overcome. But the deep pain of betrayal only occurs after you’ve made the mistake of trusting the wrong person.

If you can catch the signs of betrayal before you get stabbed in the back, you can protect yourself from the worst. Removing toxic people from your life might be hard at first, but it’s for the best.

In fact, mental health professionals suggest cutting ties with toxic people to promote a healthier and happier life - whether they are friends, family members, or your significant other.

The good news is that there are some unmistakable behaviors that someone who is about to betray you will display. Check out these 7 warning signs of betrayal.

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1 - They’re Too Nice.

Some people are genuinely nice, and it doesn’t mean they’ll betray you. The problem is when someone is too nice. They might force-feed you compliments, buy you little gifts, or do things for you all the time - without you ever asking or wanting them to. Usually, people like this aren’t genuine.

They’re fake and manipulative. Their performance will trick you into trusting them - so that they can take advantage of you in the future. Like sweet sticky paper to a fly, their niceness is a trap.

2 - They Guard Their Phone.

Not everyone is comfortable sharing their phone password with friends or lovers - and that’s okay. It becomes a problem when someone becomes overly cautious about handing their phone over for casual interactions or leaving it out - especially when they weren’t in the past.

If someone is planning on betraying you (or already has), they’ll guard their phone (and their secrets) with their life. These behaviors may appear in the form of a changed password, phone calls taken in separate rooms, making sure you can’t see the screen when they text, or seeming paranoid about notifications.

If someone is hiding things on their phone or keeping secrets from you, it’s probably something to do with you, or something they don’t want you to know about.

3 - They Act Out Of Character.

Once you get to know someone, it tends to be fairly easy to predict how they might act or respond to certain situations. If you notice that someone isn’t acting like themselves, it’s a sign that something’s up.

They could be subtle signs and might not be cause for immediate concern - but if instances of yelling, complaining or zoning out during conversations continue to arise, you might be in trouble. Unexplainable changes in behavior toward you could indicate that someone is about to betray you.

4 - They Purposely Exclude You.

Having a fear of missing out is normal, and it shouldn’t always be a cause for alarm. But if a friend or loved one is purposely making you feel like you don’t belong, something is up.

Being excluded from group activities you used to enjoy together, could be a sign you’re about to be betrayed.

It could be post-work drinks at the bar, Sunday night poker games, or even casual conversations. It’s a sign that they don’t want to spend time with you, and it could also mean that they’re keeping secrets from you.

Feeling like you’re being excluded is terrible - and you might not even notice at first - but there are plenty of ways to find out if your friends are getting together without you.

how to know if someone is trying to betray you

5 - They Begin To Pull Away.

Pulling away is a common sign that you’re about to be betrayed - especially if you live with this person or usually see them often. If it’s your partner, they might be pulling away if they don’t come home for dinner, avoid seeing you when possible, or provide fewer details about their personal life spent outside of the relationship.

Regarding a relationship with a friend or co-worker, you might find them avoiding you in the breakroom, not sitting next to you when they usually would, not eating lunch with you anymore, or even ignoring you when you run into each other.

If someone in your life is pulling away, it means that they’re beginning to focus more on their life apart from you. Instead of doing things to keep the relationship alive, they’ve decided it’s best to let everything fade gently into the past.

When you ask them about it, they’ll tell you everything is okay - and maybe they believe that. But the truth is that actions speak louder than words, and they’ve shown you that they don’t care about your relationship anymore.

6 - They Lie To You.

If someone was honest and trustworthy at one point but now lies to your face, betrayal is in the near future. If you catch someone lying multiple times, they’re probably trying to cover something up.

Someone might lie about where they’ve been, what they’ve been doing, or who they’ve been seeing. They could also lie about spending money, what they think, or other essential details.

If you’re dealing with a partner who’s close to having an affair, they’re probably lying because they aren’t 100% certain if they want to be with you or break things off - especially if there are other ties involved, like children or a mortgage.

However, honesty is foundational in any relationship. Without it, you only witness lies, betrayal, and disaster.

7 - They Begin To Demean, Bully Or Belittle You.

Sometimes when someone has a problem, they’ll demean, belittle, or berate you - instead of having an honest conversation. If someone treats you with disrespect, it’s a clear sign of potential betrayal - especially if they used to be kind.

They might become outright verbally abusive, but the bullying could also be passive-aggressive. Instead of being honest about their feelings, this person is trying to give you a good reason to end the relationship. If it works, you may never know or understand what happened; and if it doesn’t work, they may push you to your limits.

This kind of behavior indicates narcissistic personality disorder. If you experience verbal, physical, or emotional abuse from someone, know that you do have other options. When faced with betrayal, it’s natural to want to retaliate.

When we’re hurt, it’s common to want to hurt others - but that mindset is toxic. Instead of stooping to the level of the betrayer, you can try to repair the relationship as best you can for your own wellbeing. Even if the person is not receptive, you can confront them about what happened, discuss how you feel, and forgive them - whether you receive an apology or not.

It might not be easy, but you can make peace, grieve the loss of a relationship in your own time, and move on. Don’t forget that moving toward a happier, healthier future involves learning from the past.

Avoid being hurt again by watching out for these signs of betrayal.

6 Narcissistic Manipulation Tactics You Need to Know

2021-02-17T00:51:00.007-08:00

6 Narcissistic Manipulation Tactics You Need to Know.

Manipulative relationships are abusive and incredibly damaging. It can even be the most traumatic experience a person will ever have. More often than not, victims of this type of abuse are blind to the Narcissistic manipulation.

They rarely suspect that the people who should love them the most, are using tactics of psychological control. Instead of providing happiness and bolstering success, these loved ones become obstacles to achievement.

how are we supposed to cope with these kinds of relationships?

The hard truth is that changing a narcissist's behavior is almost impossible. Usually, the best option is to walk away. But when that person is a parent, relative, spouse, or another significant figure to you, it makes having a narcissist in your life even more difficult.

When you can identify their narcissistic manipulation tactics, you enable yourself to respond positively - outsmarting them, and protecting yourself from harm. Here are 6 Narcissistic Manipulation Tactics.

6 Narcissistic Manipulation Tactics You Need to Know.

1 - Amplification.

Narcissists like to amplify failure and push success aside when it comes to their relationships. You'll see your achievements go unnoticed and uncelebrated, while your shortcomings and mistakes are highlighted with painful detail.

The end goal is to belittle you, so that the narcissist can assume the center of attention. When you’re drained of energy and full of doubt, finding success will be more challenging.

2 - Shaming.

Most manipulators know that they can turn the pain of shame into a weapon. That's why they love humiliation. Frequent insults that highlight disgust, contempt, or disappointment are favorites within their arsenal, and they prefer to pull them out in front of an audience.

The goal is to produce feelings of worthlessness and inadequacy, which subdue you into submission. If you fall prey to this narcissistic tactics , you may become trapped in a vicious cycle of negative thought patterns and feelings.

3 - Enmeshment.

Narcissists have no trouble crossing boundaries, and this disregard can evolve into a form of narcissistic manipulation . Enmeshment is a term that refers to relationships where personal boundaries are unclear.

Without respect for another person's individuality and specific needs, manipulators will say or do whatever they want - toward you, in front of you, or behind your back.

Protesting or calling on morality won't make a difference. Sometimes, this process is covert - and damage increases over time, until it's too late.

Enmeshment deters you from speaking up about your emotions, getting support from others, and establishing healthy boundaries. It makes it difficult to effect positive changes - for yourself and those you care about.

4 - Rationalization.

When a narcissist can't evade their behavior, they will rationalize it. Their justifications and excuses are often full of false reasons or fraudulent perspectives.

Despite the fact that these rationalizations are full of lies, others will often believe them and see their side as understandable or even acceptable - especially when these lies are spread behind your back.

The manipulator will likely change their story based on who they're talking to, as well. The end goal is to escape ridicule. The narcissist wants you off their case so they can pursue their behavior with entitlement. They want you to feel dumb, inexperienced, or like you just don't understand them.

5 - Playing the Victim.

Even though narcissists make victims of others, they love playing the victim. They will excuse their behavior or garner attention by claiming their suffering is the result of circumstance or another person.

You can recognize this narcissistic tactics when they say they "had no other option," or if they complain all the time. They might also say that the person they are manipulating is actually the one manipulating them.

Narcissists do this because they want to get pity, sympathy, or compassion from others.

It helps them escape blame while gaining support from more unsuspecting victims. Overall, a narcissist's goal is to control. These narcissistic manipulation tactics degrade victims' sense of autonomy, erode identity, and diminish social standing.

Once weakened, the manipulator can easily dominate their victims. Although these behaviors signal antisocial traits that indicate personality disorders, almost everyone displays some of these behaviors at one time or another. The key to recognizing an unhealthy relationship with a manipulative person is identifying patterns.

Because many of these narcissistic tactics are covert, it may take years to see the insidious patterns of abuse - especially if you have a history of abuse or are an overly forgiving person. However, when you know these strategies and can name them, it will be more difficult for a narcissist to use them on you.

6 - Deflection, Diversion, And Evasion.

Narcissists use this narcissistic manipulation to get out of answering direct questions and avoid being caught in lies.

They may deflect, by transferring the conversation onto you; divert, by steering the topic toward something else; or evade, by responding with something unrelated, vague, or meaningless.

The narcissist's goal is to confuse and redirect attention. This way, they don't have to take responsibility for their behavior.

How to Attract What You Want! (Law of Attraction)

2021-02-16T04:47:00.001-08:00

when we learn how to speak to the universe and feel our way into a new reality we can attract what we want in an effortless way.

Following is a daily gratitude script that you can read to yourself each morning and evening to create an abundant life.

attract what you want instantly

This is a simple and powerful process, and in doing it with consistency you tell the universe how your life unfolds, and you can experience the magic that manifests because of that.

With this simple practice you can literally change your life in dynamic ways.

As you read to the words or say them to yourself, try to really feel how they feel and embody the truth and experience of them.

The universe responds to my thoughts and feelings. This energetic power knows who I am, and what i want to experience, and that fills me with gratitude.

I will take this day to consciously think and feel in ways that match what I choose to create. And as I do this, I know that everything always works out for me and that things flow to me in perfect timing.

I am blessed with positive thoughts, perceptions, understanding and experiences. And I am always amazed at how well my day goes.

I am becoming more aware of my personal power and my importance.
I am worthy of a beautiful life and I am in harmony with ideas that align with the life I love.

I am kind and compassionate to myself and to others, and i see and experience daily evidence of my personal creation process, in fun and positive ways.

I am opening myself to new connections and find that i am consistently connecting with like-minded people who assist me on my journey.

They benefit my life and I benefit theirs. I am grateful for all the wonderful people I have in my life, for the love we share and for the joyous experiences we co-create.

I love being a positive inspiration to others and find inspiration in every interaction. As I share my personal gifts I am rewarded with more abundance and more love.

attract what you want in life

I am resting well each evening and as I wake each day, my body is full of energy and vitality. I feel well and I look great. I love myself more and more each day.
I am grateful to be alive and enjoy interacting with the universe in positive ways.

As I move through my day, I am constantly surprised and delighted by what shows up for me. The universe is a friendly place and it's always willing to assist me. it's so much fun to play with all of the different energies surrounding me.

My abundance grows daily.my prosperity affords me new experiences and I graciously send it out into the world so others may also have new experiences.

As I play with my prosperity, it comes back to me multiplied and I am full of gratitude. I love the new surprises that abundance brings into my life.

I give immense gratitude for my spiritual support that assists me on my path. Their attention to the details in my life is amazing. It's as though i have my own personal team creating beneficial opportunities for me and for that i am grateful.

I love knowing that I can connect with the spiritual power anytime i choose and that this infinite power flows wisdom knowledge and divine intuition to me.

I am offered limitless choices. I can engage in or disengage from, anything I choose and I am constantly guided to the easiest, most abundant path available for me. Thank you for this gift.

My natural state is feeling good and experiencing happiness.
I give thanks that I can easily enter a space of calmness no matter what is going on.

I know that things can change in an instant when I invite peaceful feelings of gratitude to wash over me.

I love seeing how my life unfolds so magically. Thank you for bringing me more evidence each day of loving support and for showing me how amazing my life truly is.

You can add to or adjust the wording as you see fit pertaining to your life and your circumstances.

How to deal with loneliness after a breakup

2021-02-12T03:04:00.010-08:00

How often do you feel lonely? While it's common for all of us to experience loneliness after a breakup, what do we do with the feeling persists more than we're used to? How to deal with loneliness after a breakup?

If not dealt with properly, loneliness can grow into something harmful to a mental health.

Now, if you believe you're suffering from excessive or chronic loneliness, a good plan might be to seek out help through a counselor or mental health professional.
It's a great first step and gives you a chance to talk with someone about your feelings that you're experiencing.

While a lot of us can feel lonely when isolated for too long, loneliness isn't reliant on being alone.

Loneliness, like all of our emotions, is a state of mind. Research demonstrates that loneliness does not reflect how many friends or family members you have by your side.

Instead, it's how connected you feel internally. You can be surrounded by family or friends, and yet your feelings of loneliness still somehow managed to persist.

So what can we do about it?

Today we will talk about four tips to help you deal with loneliness after a breakup.

How to deal with loneliness after a breakup.

1. become friends with yourself first.

Self care is something that is extremely important for our mental health.

The truth is, we may feel lonely because deep down we longed for our own friendship. When's the last time you were kind to yourself, took a minute to relax and wind down just for you? And I don't mean passing out after a long night of working.

I mean conscious time dedicated to yourself and your thoughts, thoughts all on you, not work, not drama, just relaxation. This could mean a relaxing bubble bath instead of a quick shower. Some time spent doing an activity or a hobby that you enjoy, or perhaps sitting down with your favorite book.

When loneliness comes knocking on the door, it's a good idea to look inwards and spend some time with the friend within ourselves. They may be the one to help us calm ourselves and relieve some stress. That is if we do spend time with them. Once we've made friends with ourselves, we might not feel as lonely around others or on our own, because you always know you got your back.

2. show compassion.

Oftentimes, when we're lonely, we may wish that someone could simply be there for us, someone to understand us and show us some compassion. Well, a little compassion can go a long way.

Don't you feel a little cheerier when someone gives you a compliment? when someone does a favor for you? Don't you feel a little more valued and less alone? Wouldn't you want to bring that compassion to others as well and spread love? Because not only does carrying out kind acts for others help them feel cheery, but it can make us feel cheery as well, and less lonely in the process.

After all, we're engaging in a form of social interaction. Compassion can be a step towards making a new friend, or simply feeling less lonely knowing you may have made someone's day. According to research from psychologists, Ed Diener and Martin Seligman, altruism can lead to improved mental and physical health as well as speed up recovery from diseases.

Brain imaging research from Naomi Eisenberger at UCLA has found that providing support for others, may have unique positive effects on key brain areas involved in stress and reward responses.

The research shows that a little compassion and support can predict decreased stress responses in the brain. So next time you're feeling lonely, perhaps reach out to a family member or old friend who could use some support, donate to a charity or volunteer with an organization you care about, maybe a mental health organization on loneliness, I'm sure they'd love to support as much as you.

3. find your tribe.

As mentioned, you don't need to be physically alone to feel lonely. You could be at a loud, seemingly fun party with others and still you can't help but shake the feeling.

Perhaps you do have friends or classmates you regularly talk to and you do get along with them, but you don't necessarily have a lot in common with them.

You may even find yourself disinterested in the topics they discuss, but politely not alone because hey they're your friends after all, and you care about them. But sometimes you feel like the odd one out. This may be due to the idea that you haven't found your tribe yet.

Tribe, what on earth do you mean?

Well, looking for your tribe means you're looking for people who share common interests and ideas with you or possess traits you aspire to adapt.

We should all surround ourselves with others who share the same interest, so we can not only discuss what we value, but gain a friend in doing so. It can take some people many years to find their tribe, they don't appear out of thin air. That's why joining an online community with interests similar to your own is an easy place to start. If you enjoy a certain video game, reach out to online players and make some friends.

Or perhaps you're a book lover, join a book club online or in person. You may find yourself with your very own tribe in no time.

How to deal with loneliness after a breakup?

4. there is no perfect friend.

If you're lonely, you may have daydreamed about what it would be like to be perfectly socialized, imagining yourself with an ideal group of friends and your best friend, the perfect friend.

Hate to burst your bubble, but there's no such thing as perfect, meaning your imaginary friend isn't all you'd hoped they'd be. Theory and research suggests that those with a high level of perfectionism are more at risk for depressive symptoms and suicide ideation, because their feelings of alienation, isolation and loneliness are all the more intense.

Thing is, perfectionism and socializing may even prevent them from socializing at all. Because when they do look for the perfect friend, they can't seem to find them anywhere. Philosopher and author of "A Philosophy of Loneliness" Lars Svendsen, argues that people with chronic loneliness may likely be social perfectionist. Svendsen explains that social perfectionism is more common among lonely individuals than non lonely.

The lonely person thinks that they're unloved and that no one will befriend them. But perhaps the problem is rather that because they place such impossible demands on friendship and love, they are not capable of loving or befriending someone.

Now, are you capable of befriending someone? Absolutely. Don't let a little perfectionism get in the way of making a new friend. People have flaws, and not every social interaction is meant to be amazing. It can be awkward at times, or even silly.

Once we're content with knowing friendships can be messy, awkward and silly at times, we can then feel a little more relaxed when it comes to making a new friend.

If you think your perfectionism is getting in the way of finding a friend, know that someone is out there for you, but they won't be perfect. And flaws and all, you'll still love each other and may even be a little less lonely. There's someone out there for you, you just have to keep looking.

best books after a breakup

Breakups. They can be more than just difficult. Especially before and during a major romantic holiday. But there is a way to “not be alone” this Valentine’s Day even if you are by yourself. Book lovers will always have good, reliable books, which don’t let you down, always keep things fresh, and never ask anything of you but your love and attention.

Whether through a fictional story, a biography, or a self-help book, you can find lots of stories and advice filled with hope and learn to move on from a hard breakup.

breakup books

1. THE POST-BIRTHDAY WORLD BY LIONEL SHRIVER

2. BRIDGET JONES’S DIARY BY HELEN FIELDING

3. WHAT I TALK ABOUT WHEN I TALK ABOUT RUNNING BY HARUKI MURAKAMI

4. THE BREAKUP BIBLE BY MELISSA KANTOR

5. EAT, PRAY, LOVE BY ELIZABETH GILBERT

6. WHO AM I WITHOUT YOU? FIFTY-TWO WAYS TO REBUILD SELF-ESTEEM AFTER A BREAKUP BY CHRISTINA HIBBERT

7. SIX-WORD MEMOIRS ON LOVE AND HEARTBREAK BY LARRY SMITH

8. GETTING PAST YOUR BREAKUP: HOW TO TURN A DEVASTATING LOSS INTO THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO YOU BY SUSAN ELLIOTT

How To Overcome Shyness? 10 Easy Tips

2021-02-09T07:24:00.006-08:00

Do you think too much before talking or interacting with others? Do you try to guess how others will perceive you? Are you concerned of what others may think about you?

Sometimes shy people feel they are just watching from the outside, the more confident you are the less shy you will feel.

Let's find out how to overcome shyness and feel confident in social situations.

People who are shy enjoy spending time by themselves or with a close group of friends.

what is shyness?

In self-related cognitions in anxiety and motivation Arnold Herbert Buss from the university of Texas explains that shyness may be defined as inhibition, discomfort, or awkwardness in the presence of others.

For example, when we are shy we tend to stay in a conversational group but we do not speak up remember minimal replies and fail to socially interact with others.

According to the American psychological association shyness is the tendency to feel awkward, worried or tense during social encounters, especially with unfamiliar people.

In addition, shy people prefer to spend time alone talking to themselves or others in their head.

Shyness has also been defined as anxious self-preoccupation.

Severe shyness could lead to social anxiety which is a psychiatric disorder.

7% of Americans have been diagnosed with this severe form of shyness.

Therefore, if you feel trapped in your own thoughts, and wish you could feel at ease in social situations, here are 10 easy tips on how to overcome shyness.

10 easy tips to overcome shyness?

1. Build your self-esteem

Our self-esteem impacts many aspects of our lives such as how we think about ourselves and how we interpret social situations.

When we feel shy we worry about making mistakes and what others may think about us. in addition, low self-esteem and shyness could lead to anxiety depression and loneliness.

On the other hand having high self-esteem means that you are able to view yourself in a positive way regardless of mistakes or shortcomings. If you focus on building your self-esteem you will feel more confident when interacting with others and will believe that you have useful information to share with them.

2. Be mindful

when you are in a social situation deliberately focus on being present. this will help you to stop the thoughts in your head. look for positive things around you such as a nice environment or interesting people. in addition use your senses to stay in the present moment.

become aware of what you hear, see, smell, or taste at that moment. when you feel your anxiety rising take a deep breath. inhale and exhale to the count of three a couple of times to feel more at ease. if there is too much going on around you excuse yourself and get some fresh air and breathe.

3. Trust yourself

Here are some questions and thoughts that shy people ponder when they are in social situations.

What Should I Say?.
I Wanted To Say That.
I Cannot Think Of Anything To Add To The Conversation.
How Much Should I Tell?.
Will My Comment Hurt Someone's Feelings?.
Is This A Smart Thing To Say?.
Where Should I Start?.
When Is A Good Time To Chime In?.
Will Others Be Interested ?
Am I Interrupting?.

When they finally decide to talk and are waiting for a gap to insert their comment, they realize that the topic of the conversation has already changed.

Too late. They decide not to share their thoughts and start the process again with a new conversation topic. this is particularly frequent in group conversations or meetings. next time instead of overthinking trust your intuition and speak up.

4. Focus on your strengths.

what are you good at? what are your interests? join groups about topics that you find interesting. this will make it easier to connect with others and share your opinion. everyone has areas of strengths and weaknesses. however, focusing on your strengths makes you feel more confident it is easier to talk about the topic that you are interested in.

5. Consider your appearance.

A little self-care goes a long way. Remember to:

Brush your teeth.
Get enough sleep.
Trim your nails.
Comb your hair.
Dress appropriately.

Shy people tend to spend a lot of time by themselves and they may forget to take good care of themselves. in addition, find out what will help you feel more confident to speak up and participate in group situations.

6. Take Off The Pressure.

Instead of thinking that everyone focuses on you, keep in mind that most people just focus on themselves.

a good way to motivate yourself to overcome shyness is to remember the purpose of that social situation.

What are you trying to accomplish? here are some options:

Learn something new.
Get new clients.
Enjoy yourself.
Meet new people.
Find your soul mate.
Have a good time and relax.
Explore new opportunities.
Find a new job.

Regardless of why you are participating in this uncomfortable social situation, keeping in mind why you are doing it and what your intention is will help you to take action and participate.

7. Assume The Best Intentions.

Sometimes when we participate in social situations we feel self-conscious, and believe that everyone is there to catch and point out our mistakes. We imagine people judging us for every word and action.

The worst part is that when we feel awkward tense and nervous we may say or do more weird things than when we feel calm and relaxed. In our mind we believe that others have the same behavior pattern as the people who raised us.

If our parents were very critical we will assume that everyone around us is also very critical. it is easier to overcome shyness if we think that others are doing the best they can and so are we.

8. Practice Your Skills.

If you are determined to overcome your shyness embrace every opportunity to talk to others. Talk to your neighbors, or colleagues and family members.

Ask a question or share some information. Don't judge yourself for making silly or irrelevant comments. If you are too harsh on yourself every time you talk you won't even try. Think of talking to others as a learning experience.

9. Encourage Yourself.

What thoughts would make you feel at ease when you are in a social situation?

Here are some phrases to get you in a positive mindset:

I have interesting information to share.
This will be an exciting experience.
I appreciate others and they appreciate me.
Others are curious about what i have to say.
I am important and others care about me.
I am part of the group.

Also, if you are wondering how to overcome shyness having positive thoughts about yourself and others will make you feel motivated to participate in social situations.

10. Ask Questions.

If you fear awkward silence or nothing coming to your mind to talk about, consider asking questions to others.

For example, there are moments when everyone goes silent and it seems there is nothing to talk about. you may feel your stress creeping up when your mind goes blank and you only can think of, what am i supposed to say now?

Don't worry. Keep in mind that you always can ask questions.

In addition, make sure to ask open-ended questions that could not be answered with a yes or no. This will allow the other person to expand on his or her thoughts.

You may have some extra time to think about something you want to talk about or you may excuse yourself.

Try one of these tips today to overcome shyness.

The more you practice the more confident you will feel in your social interactions.

How to deal with a narcissist? 5 Ways To fool the narcissist

2021-01-30T02:49:00.011-08:00

Narcissists have no sympathy for anyone. They don't care about your feelings, once you realize that you're dealing with a narcissist. you have to understand that they are emotionally unavailable, they don't feel as much as you do and as such you shouldn't expect them to do things for you the way you do for them.

To deal with that here are five methods in which you can fool the narcissist and expose them.

how to deal with a narcissist?

1. do not fall for their temptation.

narcissists enjoy engaging in fair fights not physical battles per se but they love to push people's emotional buttons, by doing this you are tempted to protect yourself verbally, by doing this you fall straight into the narcissist trap because that is precisely what he wants you to do. and when you do you become the wrong person or the person who has no self-control. but the only way to deal with the narcissist in this situation is to ignore him or her completely ,do not react to the emotions that he wants you to. if you are not used to emotional intelligence learn it because when you do that is the first step in humbling the narcissist.

2. do not feed his ego.

At so many times the narcissist will try to do things that will warrant you to praise him. the most significant mistake you can make as a person is falling for that trap, you have to realize that there is nothing the narcissist does that doesn't have an ulterior motive. so showering praises on the narcissist will only grow his weak little ego, each time you feed his ego he feels better than you. Still, if you do not provide it, he won't have the guts to conceive such in his mind, and he will be humbled where you are.

3. do not take responsibility for their actions.

The narcissist always looks for ways to shift blames to others when they must have done wrong. They believe that they are still right and never wrong, and even if they are caught in the act, they always seem to have an excuse as to why they did what they did.

If you take responsibility for his wrongdoings you are giving him the go-ahead to do more and push the blames on you and before you know it, he will believe that it is his right to do whatever it is he is doing. But being straightforward with him and making him answer for his wrongs will cut his ego down and make him humbled.

4. do not give deadlines in your relationship.

using deadlines in a relationship is a sign of control. since the narcissist always wants to be in control he will always use that in his connection, if you notice that he is using this too many times against you, you have to confront him and make sure there is an agreement to stop it, even though this is partly your fault because you permitted him to start in the first place. talk to him about it and make sure to stand your ground and end it.

5. never give him negative attention

Narcissists are like children they love attention, the kind of attention to give to the narcissist is positive attention. Giving them negative attention is vital to their ability to hold you accountable; this is one of the unhealthy parts of their thinking. They always need you to give them hostile attentions such as lashing out at them. If you happen to be closer to the narcissist, you are the reliable, most consistent target for receiving negative attention. Because of this, the narcissist will work tirelessly to make sure you stick around.

10 Ways To to Deal with Stress During a Pandemic

2021-01-25T07:49:00.013-08:00

Now during the pandemic, our stress level is higher than ever before. We worry about friends and family's health and safety we are not enjoying our usual activities such as going places or meeting with friends, our workplace and routine have changed.

Stress is something we all experience regardless of who we are or how much money we have.

We are going to talk about 10 ways to deal with stress.

When we are stressed, it is straightforward to grab some food, alcohol, drugs, or other unhealthy coping mechanisms. If we don't manage stress, it will impact our physical and mental health.

I talked earlier about how to deal with stress. Today we are going to define stress, recognize the symptoms of stress and learn techniques to manage stress.

What is stress?

Stress is what we feel when we are trying to adapt to changes, in this case wearing face masks staying home as much as we can, the possibility of getting sick social distancing, living in a place with a lot of other people and spending a lot of time at home.

So positive stress can be caused by having kids being promoted or even falling in love. Stress could be positive or negative. It takes some time to adapt to the new circumstances even if they are positive, experiences perceived as negative such as illnesses loss of a job or any other negative experience, will also increase our stress level. To deal with stress, let's find out the most common signs that there is a problem.

What are the symptoms of stress?

common symptoms of stress:

If you have difficulty sleeping feeling overwhelmed, you have problems with your memory or remembering things difficulty concentrating nervousness or anxiety, anger irritability or frustration. So why do we feel stress? We tend to react differently to stressful situations, so situations that make you feel stressed may not be stressful for someone else.

There are different sources of stress which include:

social-cultural stressors

financial difficulties
time constraints
losses
deadlines
relationship difficulties
failure
discrimination

physiological stressors

accidents
poor nutrition
getting old
menopause
sleep disturbances
giving birth

environmental stressors

such as noise
traffic
weather
pollution
crowded living spaces

psychological stressors

negative thought patterns
unrealistic expectations
pessimism
perfectionism
negative self-talk
negative beliefs
low self-esteem

How To Relieve Stress Quickly?

10 Tips To Relieve Stress

1. find out the source of stress

Knowing exactly what produces stress is the first step to feel relief. for instance if the primary source of stress is your job figure out exactly what triggers the most tension. It may be completing a particular task dealing with a specific client or being assigned based projects. Once you know what bothers you the most, you will make some changes to reduce the level of stress.

2. listen to music

Music can influence your emotional well-being. It is a fast and easy way to deal with stress when, what's more, music can help our mind and body relax with that in mind the right choice of music particularly slow quiet and classical music can help you sleep better.

3. engage in creative activities.

Visual arts and writing can help you relieve negative emotions and relax your mind. Through writing, you can express how you feel without being judged, which is therapeutic. With that in mind, you can journal sketch something or indulge in creative writing.

4. take care of yourself.

Maintaining a healthy body can help you cope with stress.

sleep for eight to nine hours
eat a balanced diet
hydrate
Exercise.

5.lower your expectations.

Unrealistic expectations can make us feel like running endlessly in a hamster treadmill. Decide what can be realistically accomplished under the current circumstances. focus on one task at a time

6. relax.

Stress tends to cause muscle tension stretching your arms and legs can help loosen your muscles. Spending time in a peaceful and quiet place can help you relax.

7. practice deep breathing.

Taking deep breaths can ease your stress. You can do simple breathing in and out exercises. This not only replaces the oxygen in your lungs, but it also helps to improve your blood circulation and alertness. Practicing deep breathing and using it with purpose will help diminish intrusive thought patterns that no longer benefit you.

8. take a technology break.

Survey findings indicate that 86% of Americans continuously check their emails, texts, and social media accounts. This creates an overwhelming flow of information and distraction, adding to cognitive overload and stress. Try to minimize your phone usage or watching too much tv. Instead, engage in healthier activities like exercising or reading.

9. be mindful.

Mindfulness is an effective way of managing and minimizing symptoms of stress.

Focus on the present by using your senses.

concentrate on the tasks at hand without worrying about the past or the future.

10. keep a gratitude attitude.

Even in the middle of a stressful situation keep in mind what you can feel grateful for, you may be thankful for the opportunity to demonstrate your skills at work take care of a loved one or learn something new. Keeping a grateful attitude will help you keep calm and see the big picture, instead of complaining and feeling grumpy.

how to relieve neck and shoulder pain from stress?

I'm going to share some quick ways to reduce stress and tension. If you feel your shoulders your back or your neck tense or you feel overwhelmed, the first step is to take a deep breath, you inhale through your nose, and you fill all your tummy with air, and you continue inhaling and you feel your lungs expanding, and when you cannot hold any more air, you exhale slowly.

So you repeat this a couple of times until you feel more relaxed. You could also go for a walk, or you could close your eyes and imagine that you are at the place that you like a lot, for example, the beach. So you want to involve all your senses of the going to the beach experience.

You would feel the sand on your feet when you are walking, and the cool breeze in your face and your hair listening to the waves and the seagulls and this quiet and relaxed place will help you relax. And at the same time breathing and feeling your tummy and your lungs with air.

This in-depth reading will help you put some space between you and the stressful situation, and that is the first step to relax.

Which of these strategies did you find the most useful?

8 Steps To Make Life More EXCITING

2021-01-24T05:55:00.021-08:00

Make your life more exciting, after reading this article you'll learn how to make your life more interesting than you've ever had, life isn't always rosy and bright, and that is how we live through it the good times and the bad.

But you can still be content and excited even when things are not going your way before now. I have found myself where I think I do not belong, but by spicing things up, I was able to cope with everything that came my way.

Things to make life more exciting:

Your life can be interesting than you've ever expected. I discussed some of the ways I made my life more fun. I also featured some tips endorsed by experts.

Instagram is where people lie the most on social media. a significant percentage of people paint a picture of a life that is perfect; the big truth is life can get a little boring when it is boring you lose interest in the things you used to love, and you don't feel excited anymore.

Life can feel relatively mundane and full of tedious routines we have all been there at different points in our lives, sometimes it lasts for days sometimes for years. You don't have anything to look forward to the next day.

Ways to make life more exciting:

You want to go to school, or work gets it over and done with to have enough money to pay for your utility bills or secure that degree, but is that not a significant signal that your life is not exciting anymore.

If you are stuck in your life and don't know how to make your day colourful again, I have tips that I'll be sharing with you.

Before now, I have found myself where I think I did not belong, but spicing things up I could cope with everything that came my way.

Your life can be interesting than you've ever expected. I will discuss some of the ways I made my life more fun; I also featured some tips endorsed by experts.

What can i do to make life more exciting:

1. Get A New Hobby.

Picking up a new hobby always works, we all have hobbies. They are things we enjoy doing in our spare time when we are less busy, we de-stress and gain joy through these activities, a new hobby will not only add more fun and joy into your life, but it can also make life feel more exciting as well with the challenges you have to face.

Additionally, by leaving your comfort zone and attaining new goals, you will boost your self-confidence and feel proud of yourself. There is a chance to meet new people who are passionate about something somewhat different.

This is perhaps a critical stage where the new interest might reveal something. The new friends you make might even give you a fresh perspective on living and life generally.

The things you didn't think were beautiful before are now seen as stunning in your eyes, I have also learned that meeting new people and hearing them share their ideas and views is like visiting a new place especially when their thoughts are different yours. Sometimes it feels like taking a trip to an exotic destination.

Hence, as your new passion becomes more trustworthy. you will begin to have other plans with it, you will begin to plan hiking trips or any other activities you probably didn't think you'll be doing.

Then life certainly looks exciting again to you.

2. Enroll In Classes And Learn Something New.

In making your life exciting again, people are essential, enrolling in classes and learning something new is similar to learning new hobbies because there is a chance to meet new people. However, the difference is that taking classes is more about learning and taking in rather than taking steps and having fun. it involves teachers and students it gives you the whole school vibe,

- language classes

- art classes

- cooking classes

- or singing lessons are examples of such courses.

Learning is about progression. Unlike taking up a new hobby, the significant advantage of this apart from having a new skill set is a sense of fulfilment and pride in yourself. If you have always wanted to learn something but never had the chance to take this time to learn something new so that you won't regret it later.

3. Change Your Job.

If you have a job perhaps now is the time to quit it for another to feel excitement again in your life,

the temptation to quit can even be much for you that hates your job; our job should be something that we enjoy doing it, should be something we are good at and something that gives us satisfaction apart from helping us pay the bills.

If you're worried about the lack of spark in your life right now, you might discover something when you reflect on your job and how much sense of pride you take from it at this point. meanwhile it is not difficult to fall into the trap of feeling like you were caught in a job and there's no way to get out of it.

We usually get scared of change what we don't know brings the feeling of insecurity, but the first step you should take to get rid of is the fear of not having a stable income.

If you don't have any savings make sure you save first. but while that is happening to build your self-belief and get into a habit of living within your means, after this start looking for a new job.

4. Do Something Different For A Living.

To find your spark finding a new job in the same industry is not enough. you might have the experience and skillset in the industry, but you can also get bored with it after doing it for say ten years.

If you're up for the challenge, consider moving to a different field, do something entirely different from what you have been doing for the past years.

If you were into banking, you could venture into technology or hospitality.

Moving to another field might give you a new perspective on life what's more you can get yourself many new friends and your life will start to bubble again.

5. Travel.

Travelling is the quickest way to get excited again; it opens your eyes and inspires your senses; travel means smelling seeing hearing and experiencing new things.

If you feel bored with your life. you should consider leaving everything behind you to go travel.

Pick somewhere affordable, and fun like south America or southeast Asia your experiences are bound to stay with you forever when you have kids you won't tell them about your boring,

mundane life at work; they'll want to hear about the fun you had and other delightful memories that you made when you travelled.

6. Move To Another Country.

That'll be some bold move I know, while travelling is special and life-changing it is not as exciting as moving to another country, but it's not easy you'll have to start from the ground up build a network make new friends learn everything around you and adapt.

Everything becomes new, but you will start falling in love with the new country again as soon as you settle.

life will remain boring if you stay on the spot without moving. so take the chance that you have it can be the sweetest experience of your life.

7. end your relationship.

If you're in a great relationship, you want to always make exciting plans with that person; a great relationship should make you feel better, not down.

Still, if you're not excited about making exciting plans with your partner. the passion may have died what is just left is friendship.

Ask yourself if you want to be fulfilled with this person or you want to try to make a life-altering decision on your own,

it is crucial to pick your partner wisely not only will you be spending most of your life with them. but your feelings interests and energy will also be influenced.

So if you want to live a positive life go for someone positive. if you want to live a fun and passionate life date, someone that is fun and passionate about your life.

8. find new friends and meet new people.

It's hard to deny that sometimes we all feel bored because we feel bored with our friends,

they don't make us feel excited or inspire us about the life they live a mundane life. they have no ambitions they are happy with routines.

It is challenging to get you out of your circle of friends sometimes because they are real friends who have been there for us for all those years.

But if we keep hanging out with ordinary people, we will become average, and if we hang out with smart people, we will be smart.

I think the biggest takeaway from this article might be that the quality of people in your life has a powerful effect on where you are going.

To make your life more exciting, don't shut the door to people in your life, surround yourself with those whose lives are exciting passion and ambition can be infectious and that is what you need for a more colourful bright and splendid life if you're feeling the glow.

13 Rare and Bizarre Psychological Syndromes/Disorders

2021-01-24T03:45:00.012-08:00

The field of psychology is one that is still growing and developing. As we learn more about the brain and human behavior, there are a number of rare and bizarre psychological syndromes and disorders that we can encounter. How many of these have you heard of?

Here 13 Rare and Bizarre Psychological Syndromes/Disorders:

1. Alice In Wonderland Syndrome (a.k.a. Todd Syndrome)

The individual sees some objects as much smaller than they really are and others as much larger than they really are. especially when observing one’s one body; finds it very difficult to judge time and has many sensory distortions, including a highly altered sense of velocity.

2. Apotemnophilia & Body Integrity Identity Disorder

Also known as amputee identity disorder: a neurological disorder and paraphilia in which a person has the overwhelming desire to amputate healthy limbs or other parts of their body and feels sexually aroused by the image/fantasy of being an amputee.

3. Capgras Delusion/Syndrome

The individual has a reoccurring delusion that an acquaintance (usually a spouse or family member) has been replaced by an identical looking impostor or several doubles; most common in patients with schizophrenia, or brain injuries.

4. Clinical Lycanthropy

Individuals experience the delusion of transforming into an animal; begin to behave like the animal they believe they have turned into.

5. Cotard Delusion (a.k.a. Walking Corpse Syndrome)

The individual holds the belief that he or she is dead, does not exist, is putrefying (decomposing) or has lost some internal organs or blood.

6. Foreign Accent Syndrome

An individual begins to uncontrollably speak their native language as if they had a foreign accent. follows a head injury, trauma, or stroke affecting the Broca’s area (controls functions for speech production).

7. Fregoli Delusion

The opposite of the Capgras delusion: different people are a single person changing their appearance or is in disguise.

8. Fugue State

Experiencing reversible amnesia for one’s personal identity (memories, personality, belongings etc.

of one’s individuality and life); lasts anywhere from a few hours to a few months, is associated with significant distress or impairment usually precipitated by strong emotional or physical stressors.

9. Lima Syndrome

Opposite of the Stockholm syndrome; hostage takers become more sympathetic to the plights and needs of the hostages.

10. Stendhal Syndrome

Psychosomatic illness that causes rapid heartbeat, dizziness, confusion, and hallucinations when an individual is exposed to particularly “beautiful” art or a large amount of it in a single place at one time.

11. Stockholm Syndrome

Stockholm Syndrome: the psychological tendency of a hostage to bond with, identify with, or sympathize with his or her captor. Despite the danger and the harm inflicted on the victims by their captors, victims feel strong emotional ties and a positive relationship with their captors.

12. Trichotillomania (TTM)

Disorder that results in a strong urge to constantly pull one’s hair out (scalp, facial, eyelashes, etc.).

Trichotillomania (hair-pulling disorder) is characterized by the persistent and excessive pulling of one’s own hair, leading to noticeable hair loss.

Hair pulling can occur in any area of the body where hair grows. The scalp is that the most typical area affected, followed by the eyelashes and eyebrows. The alopecia that results from hair pulling can range from small undetectable areas of hair thinning to finish alopecia.

Trichotillomania most typically presents in early adolescence, with the height prevalence between ages 4 and 17 years. The disorder has both physical and psychosocial implications.

13. Windigo Psychosis

A disorder involving an insatiable craving for human flesh, coupled with the simultaneous fear of becoming a cannibal.

In the early 20th century, the term “windigo” found its way into the Western medical vocabulary. it had been utilized by early psychiatrists to talk over with a mental condition within which patients felt possessed by cannibalistic desires.

Oblate Missionary J. E. Saindon was the primary to use the term within the 1920s while working in an exceedingly Cree community within the western James Bay area. There he met a lady who claimed that she saw strangers who wanted to kill and devour her. Saindon named the woman’s mental condition as a “psychoneurosis” — a mental or behavioral disorder, characterized by depression and anxiety. Overtime, the condition came to be called the Windigo Psychosis. However, whether this can be a true affliction remains a highly disputed discussion among the medical profession.

How do the Blind Dream?

2021-01-19T04:03:00.010-08:00

Images, ideas, emotions, and sensations: a dream.

Whether it’s short or long, whether you can or can’t remember it– everyone dreams.

But what do people that can’t see. see in their dreams?

…and how do they dream?

To start. here are some facts about dreams:

Dreams are usually phantasmagoric: people, places, events and objects tend to merge into one another in a confusing manner
The most common emotion experienced in dreams is anxiety and other negative emotions (much more prevalent than positive ones)
The vast majority of people dream in color (but if you watched monochrome television growing up, you are more likely to dream in black and white!)
Only around 10% of dreams are sexual in nature, although the percentage is higher among adolescents

But what about individuals that cannot see?

Individuals who have been blind since birth (congenital blindness) or very early in childhood usually have no images in their dreams– however, this varies from person to person.

Some studies conclude that if a person loses his/her sight before the age of 5. they will almost never have images in dreams.

Interestingly enough, the congenitally blind have cortical areas responsible for visual representations activated during dreaming; these activations are manifested instead through the senses of hearing, touch, taste, and smell.

For those who go blind in middle childhood. it seems that the situation can go either way– dreams are reported as both visual and non-visual at times. Initially after blindness, visuals may be present, but then slowly fade or disappear altogether after time.

(Those who become blind later in life continue to experience some images in their dreams.)

What do the blind dream about?

In a study published by a group of Danish researchers in Sleep Medicine:

18% of the blind participants (both congenital and later-onset) reported tasting in at least one dream v. 7% of the control group
30% of the blind reported smelling in at least one dream v. 15% of the control group
70% of the blind reported a touch sensation v. 45% of the control group
86% of the blind reported hearing v. 64% of the control group

When looking solely at the congenitally blind group:

26% tasted,
40% smelled,
67% touched and
93% heard in at least one dream.

Despite these sensory differences, the content of dreams is not much different in the blind and the sighted. Both groups reported about the same number of social interactions, successes, and failures in their dreams.

However, the blind group had a lot more nightmares (25% compared with only 7% of the later-onset blind group and 6% of the sighted control group). This difference held even after the researchers controlled for sleep quality, which is generally poorer among the blind.

This increased number of nightmares could be because of evolution. where nightmares can be seen as threat simulations as a mentally harmless way that the human mind can adapt to the threats of life. Basically, the nightmares give someone an opportunity to rehearse the threat perception with the avoidance of actually coping with the threat.

Often times, a recurring theme in the dreams of many blind people, congenital or not, is transportation. possibly because that is something that often gives them trouble in real life.

“The key with that is it’s your brain that’s making the dream … It’s really what your brain has experienced and what your brain continues to experience. People who are blind tend to have a lot more smells, hearing, tactile (sensations), which people who have vision tend to not have many of those. I can’t remember a dream that I’ve ever had, and I feel like a lot of sighted people feel the same way. where there were lots of textures, lots of smells.”

This makes sense because for the blind, most frequently reported nightmares included events such as getting lost, being hit by an unseen car, falling into manholes. and losing their guide dog– a greater number of reoccurring threats than the sighted in every day life. hence the increased number of nightmares.

Although the other senses take over in dreams for the blind (especially for the congenitally blind). a 2003 study conducted in the EEG/Sleep Laboratory (Centro de Estudos Egas Moniz, Faculdade de Medicina de Lisboa) in Portugal showed that when it came to visually recalling and recreating a dream, there was no statistical difference between the blind and the sighted.

When asked to create a graphical representation of a dream in the form of a drawing. blind subjects were able to create drawings of dream scenes that accurately represented the oneiric scenes they had verbally described earlier.

Between the calculated mean for complexity and the content of the drawings. no statistical differences were found between the groups.

In both groups, landscapes were present in 70% of the drawings.
Objects in 90%.
Human ﬁgures in 10%.

So what does this mean?

Although the blind can’t see with their eyes as the sighted can. they “see” in their dreams through their other. heightened senses (and sometimes can even see images, if not congenitally blind).

They dream about the same things as the sighted. although they have nightmares more frequently.

And the most surprising finding: the lack of the sense of sight in dreams does not hinder the blind from describing nor representing their dreams graphically. with accuracy and complexity being statistically the same as the sighted control group.

The Life of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr - Martin Luther King Day

2021-01-18T02:17:00.007-08:00

Dr. Martin Luther King jr was an American preacher, humanitarian, and activist who is best known for his role in the African-American civil rights movement of the 1950s and 1960s

dr. King who was inspired by his faith and the peaceful teachings of Mahatma Gandhi, is considered one of history's greatest champions of non-violence. He used the power of his words and peaceful demonstrations such as protests sit-ins, and boycotts to achieve equality for all people.

Dr.Martin Luther King jr. is a true American Hero.

Martin Luther King Jr.'s life

Let's learn more about his life and how he inspired a nation and the world to become more tolerant and accepting of all citizens regardless of race, class, or gender.

Martin Luther King jr was born on Tuesday, January 15, 1929, in Atlanta, Georgia, at midnight.

His name at verse was Michael King his father, also named Michael, changed both their names to Martin Luther in honor of the world-renowned German reformer of the same name.

Martin jr. was a middle child. He had an older sister named Willie Christine King and a younger brother named Alfred Daniel Williams King.

Martin jr. attended Booker T Washington High School and was so smart he skipped both the ninth and twelfth grades he enrolled in Morehouse College at age 15 without formally graduating from high school.

During his final semester at Morehouse College, Martin was ordained as a minister. He also took his first steps towards being an activist by writing a letter to the Atlanta Constitution editor.

In the letter, he declared that African Americans were entitled to American citizens' fundamental rights and opportunities. After graduating from Morehouse, Martin attended Crozer Theological Seminary in Pennsylvania from 1948 until 1951.

Martin then began his doctoral studies at Boston University. During this time, he began to draw from his education, his faith, and his natural verbal ability to form the foundation for what would become his critical role in the civil rights movement.

While in Boston, Martin met and dated Coretta Scott, a student at the New England Conservatory of Music. On June 18, 1953, they were married in Alabama, where the Carretas family lived. Martin and Coretta became the parents of four children Yolanda King Martin Luther King, the third Dexter Scott King, and Bernice King.

On December 1, 1955, Rosa Parks was arrested for refusing to give her seat to a white person on a crowded bus in Montgomery, Alabama, a city known for its segregated public spaces. That night Martin met with other activists to plan a citywide protest known as the Montgomery bus boycott. The boycott lasted over 380 days.

During this time, Martin was arrested and harassed by people who did not want the changes he was fighting to bring about the boycott; however, it was a success. The US Supreme Court ruled that racial segregation and transportation were unconstitutional. Martin's role in the boycott transformed him into a national figure and the best-known spokesman of the civil rights movement.

In the wake of the boycott victory, civil rights leaders recognized the need for national organizations to coordinate their efforts better. In January 1957, Martin and roughly 60 other ministers and activists founded the SCLC Southern Christian Leadership Conference.

With Martin as president, the SCLC helps conduct nonviolent protests and demonstrations across the South to promote civil rights reforms. A primary focus for the organization was registering African-Americans to vote.

The SCLC sponsored mass meetings and critical southern cities for that purpose.

In 1963 Martin led a coalition of several civil rights groups and a nonviolent campaign aimed at Birmingham, Alabama, which was described as the most segregated city in America.

The nation was shocked to see images of young African Americans attacked by police dogs and high-pressure fire hoses displayed on television, newspapers, and magazines.

During this campaign, Martin wrote his now-famous letter from a Birmingham jail after being arrested again for his participation in the demonstrations.

Later in 1963, Martin was one of the March for Jobs and Freedom's driving forces, more commonly known as the march on Washington.

Martin Luther King speech I Have a Dream

On August 28, 1963, over 250,000 people of all ethnicities gathered at the National Mall in Washington DC to demand justice and equality for all people. It was here that Martin made his famous I have a dream speech delivered from the steps of the Lincoln Memorial. This speech inspired the nation and is now considered one of the greatest in American history. Martin was later named Time Magazine's Man the year this further cemented his status as the nation's foremost social change leader.

In 1964 at 35 years old, Martin became the youngest person ever to win the Nobel Peace Prize. When he found out that he had been selected, he promised to donate the prize money over fifty-four thousand dollars to help continue the civil rights movement's important work.

he delivered another powerful speech when he accepted his award that was both moving and motivational. Also, in 1964 partly due to the march on Washington and Martin speech Congress passed the landmark Civil Rights Act. This legislation made it illegal to discriminate against people because of their race, the Jim Crow rules of the South that promoted segregation.

The harsh mistreatment of African Americans was now against federal law.

This was one of the most significant accomplishments of the civil rights movement.

In March of 1965, Martin led a march from Selma to the Capitol building in Montgomery, Alabama, to urge President Lyndon b johnson and his administration to pass a law protecting African-American rights voters. After the march, Martin gave another powerful speech that helped rally more supporters, that same year; Congress went on to pass the Voting Rights Act that eliminated the remaining barriers to voting for African Americans before this legislation.

There were still areas in which African Americans were utterly disenfranchised, meaning they did not have the right to vote.

Over the next three years, Martin spoke of racial discrimination to economic injustice and international peace.

He led campaigns in Chicago, Illinois, and spoke strongly against the Vietnam War. Martin's opposition to the war cost him support among white allies, including the president, union leaders, and publishers. Martin and the SCLC also organized the Poor People's Campaign in 1968 to assemble a multiracial coalition of impoverished Americans who would advocate for economic change.

Martin Luther King Assassination

On April 4, 1968, Martin was shot while standing on the balcony outside of his hotel room at the Lorraine Motel in Memphis, Tennessee. At 7:05 p.m., Martin was pronounced dead at st. Joseph's Hospital he was 39 years old.

Martin was buried in his hometown of Atlanta, Georgia.

Dr.Martin Luther King jr. changed the course of American history. He worked tirelessly to ensure that all people, regardless of race, religion, or national origin had equal opportunities and could live their lives without fear of violence and discrimination.

Martin is regarded as America's most significant human rights advocate.

Martin Luther King Day

In 1983 President Ronald Reagan signed a bill creating a federal holiday honoring Martin. The holiday observed on the third Monday of January each year is called Martin Luther King jr. Day or MLK Day in the year 2000 was officially marked by all 50 states for the first time.

Accomplishments Of Martin Luther King

1. March on Washington.

2. Montgomery Bus Boycott.

3. Southern Christian Leadership Conference.

4. Birmingham Campaign.

5. Nobel Peace Prize.

5 WAYS TO DEAL WITH DEPRESSION AND SOCIAL ANXIETY

2021-01-17T05:52:00.012-08:00

5 WAYS TO DEAL WITH DEPRESSION AND SOCIAL ANXIETY

If you suffer from social anxiety, you will fear certain situations. This can vary from person to person. Some will fear speaking in front of groups of people. Others will fear meeting new people, while others may fear going to parties or other types of social events.

In whichever situation your fear arises, you may experience sweating, blushing, feeling your heart racing, or some other symptoms of anxiety. One of the primary symptoms you’ll feel regardless of the situation is thinking others will judge you or find you lacking in some way.

No matter what your symptoms are or where they hit you, there are things you can do on your own to deal with your social anxiety.

Dealing With Social Anxiety

Deep Muscle Relaxation. Learning to physically relax is one of the best ways to combat anxiety. You can’t be both relaxed and anxious. In deep muscle relaxation, you will tense and relax the major muscle groups of your body, beginning with your feet and working your way to your head and face.
Slow Breathing. Controlling your breathing when you’re anxious is another good way to deal with the emotion. Much of the time when you’re anxious, your breathing becomes more shallow and faster. As a result, this can make you feel lightheaded and dizzy, bringing on more anxiety. Learning to breathe slower and more regularly through your nose will help calm you overall. This technique won’t get rid of your anxiety, but it will help you handle the anxiety better while you’re going through it.
Visualization. The key to visualization is to remember a place where you felt safe and comfortable. Once you remember this place, it’s important to get a picture of it in your mind so firmly that you can feel, see, smell, and even taste that place. This takes practice and patience.
Control Your Thoughts. Faulty thinking is a hallmark of social anxiety. Believing that others are judging you and finding you falling short in some way is the major inaccurate thinking that goes on. It’s important to evaluate whether these thoughts are true. Ask yourself for proof that they are. People with social anxiety tend to over-estimate how badly others will think of them. Keep in mind your thoughts are only guesses about what others will think or what you will do. How you think is a habit, and habits can be changed.
Face Your Anxiety. Most people with social anxiety want to hide, avoid, or run away from whatever makes them anxious. By facing your anxiety instead, you find out that it is usually something you can tolerate after a few exposures. However, you may want to try this on a situation that brings a relatively low level of anxiety first. When you try this, focus on what’s going on around you instead of what’s going through your mind. That should help you distract yourself from those anxious thoughts.

Have you found any of the described methods helpful? Do you use other strategies to cope with your social anxiety? Leave a comment below!

The Way You Think Affects Your Mental Health

2021-01-14T22:38:00.008-08:00

“Human behavior flows from three main sources: desire, emotion, and knowledge.” – Plato

We’ve all heard the phrase “mind over matter” at one point or another in our lives.

It implies that our minds, the human brain, is powerful and trumps physical “matter”.

But can our mind actually influence things. such as our own health?

For example, let’s look at depression.

Psychologists Aaron Beck and Martin Seligman suggested two theories on depression:

Beck’s Cognitive Triad, a part of his bigger “Cognitive Theory of Depression”, and
Seligman’s Theory of Learned Helplessness.

Basically, Beck said that dysfunctionally negative views, 3 in particular, pave the way for depression.

If you:

Think negatively about yourself (ex. I am worthless, everything is my fault)
Think negatively about the world/situation/environment you are in (ex. everything is unfair, the world is out to get me)
Think negatively about the future (ex. there’s no point in anything, I have no hope, it can’t be helped)

…then these things combine to create a high probability for being depressed.

The Way You Think Affects Your Mental Health.

Because these three things are crucial parts of our everyday lives. Beck attributed these main negative views as exacerbating, or even jump-starting the onset of, depression.

In his studies of depressed patients, Beck found that the majority of the patients had these three mindsets in common.

They would often blame themselves excessively. expressing guilt for being incapable, unlovable, deficient– as well as being blameworthy of these things.

Love and concern from others would be judged as being out of pity or inconsistent for their inadequate selves, rather than being born out of true affection and concern.

And finally, the patients often expressed views that in the future, things would “only get worse”– which made treatment especially difficult because they would be unwilling to commit, believing that they had no control over the situations they found themselves in (feeling helpless).

These are examples of severe catastrophizing: believing that things are far worse than they actually are, or making a catastrophe of, the current situation or the future.

Because of said helplessness, patients actually showed a strong inclination to avoid situations they felt they had no control over (therapy, treatment, etc.).

In other words, pessimism and helplessness impacted the patients’ future behavior to the point where recovery was a difficult goal to achieve.

How can one help someone who does not wish to be helped?

Going back to the start of the article, famous philosopher and mathematician Plato once said:

Human behavior flows from three main sources: desire, emotion, and knowledge.

If desire is nonexistent, emotions are primarily negative, and knowledge is biased with pessimistic views that catastrophize everything, even the future,…

…what’s most likely to happen?

What would the resulting behavior be like?

Think about it. (Positively.)

Bipolar Disorder: What is it?

2020-12-22T03:49:00.009-08:00

In recent years, mental health has become something of a craze. Whilst the older generation may have never heard of social anxiety or PTSD, those in their teenage years seem to throw these terms around without little thought. We have come a long way in medicine, and are now more aware than ever of our own psychological well-being. Yet, in the list of disorders that seems to get longer by the minute, bipolar disorder is often over-looked.

You may have heard of bipolar disorder, could have a vague idea of its symptoms due to the rather lacklustre representation of it in various TV shows, but I doubt many have given it a second thought. Originally called ‘manic depressive illness’, bipolar disorder is a condition that causes extreme lows and highs in terms of mood. These mood swings are referred to as depression and mania, respectively.

Periods of depression may include:

Feelings of hopelessness, guilt, and worthlessness
Sleeping too much or too little
Weight loss or gain
Loss of interest in daily life
Forgetfulness
Suicidal thoughts

If you are currently experiencing the above symptoms, please call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) if you’re in the US, or visit this website: http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html.

Periods of mania may include:

Feelings of excessive euphoria, restlessness, and irritability
Racing speech and thoughts
High amounts of energy
Lack of concentration
Increased sexual drive
Aggressive or risky behaviour
Excessive spending or drug/alcohol abuse

Periods of depression within bipolar disorder often last for an average of six months, although they may last longer, whereas periods of mania tend to last for relatively shorter amounts of time (between two weeks and five months). People with bipolar disorder may also experience delusions, such as hearing voices in their head. If these symptoms apply to you then please visit your GP for more information.

The causes of bipolar disorder vary greatly from genetic to environmental. For almost half of patients the disease runs in the family, however no single gene has been found as responsible for it. Chemical imbalance is also suggested as a cause, but many believe that stressful situations are the main trigger of bipolar disorder. These situations may include physical, sexual, or emotional abuse, the death of a loved one, or the breakdown of a relationship. Medication, such as anti-depressants, can also trigger mania.

One in five patients suffering from bipolar disorder commit suicide, and this is why it is so important to raise awareness, especially for teenagers. Many may be living with bipolar disorder and not even know it, resorting to self-harm or drug abuse as an outlet for their pain. It has been suggested that some adolescents with manic depression may actually be experiencing the early onset of bipolar disorder, and that in 20% of cases those with major depression have gone on to develop bipolar disorder.

If you have been affected by bipolar disorder, whether directly or indirectly, please feel free to comment below sharing your experience. If you believe that someone you know may be suffering from bipolar disorder then contact your GP for guidance.

Recalling Pain in an Emotional Way

2020-12-13T06:57:00.008-08:00

I remember traumatic moments from my childhood and early teen years extremely vividly. I remember my mom telling me that my grandfather had cancer. I remember the pain I felt when one of my closest friends moved away for college. I remember how I felt when I broke off my first relationship. I remember it all.

But I don’t remember what a sore throat feels like when I have a cold. I don’t really recall the pain I felt when I fell off my bike when I was eight and violently scraped my knee. I don’t remember the pain of my twisted ankle when I tripped on the soccer field when I was fourteen. The memories seem to escape me.

Do I have a bad memory? Was the pain bad enough that I mentally blocked it somehow? And were the emotionally painful moments that much worse than the physically painful moments?

No.

Three separate universities in different parts of the world did a study on this odd phenomenon. In their study, the researchers asked students to write the account of the traumatic events. They were asked a series of questions about the physical pain that occurred as well as the emotional pain that accompanied the events. All the events that they were asked to recall had taken place in the last five years. The researchers discovered that the students remembered the emotional pain as being more painful and vivid, while the physical pain was more toned down and less intense.

Why?

Guy Winch wrote a book called, “The Squeaky Wheel,” which deals with improving your self-esteem, creating healthy relationships, and protecting your psychological health. In his book, he wrote

five reasons why emotional pain is worse than physical pain.

1. Memories trigger emotional pain, not physical pain.

He uses a broken leg and a broken relationship as an example. Recalling the time you broke your leg won’t make your leg hurt, whilst remembering a broken relationship will cause you significant emotional pain. This event is caused by other things such as that fact that…..

2. We use physical pain as a distraction from emotional pain, but not the other way around.

Some people use dangerous outlets of emotional pain, such as cutting, burning, and other physical forms of release. For many people, this makes them feel better. The physical pain helps distract from the pain they’re feeling inside. However, this doesn’t happen the other way around. For instance, if you had a route canal and your mouth is killing you, you won’t reread a rejection letter from a college or from an old significant other. While physical pain might help temporarily relieve emotional pain, emotional pain can’t do the same for physical pain However, while we might prefer physical pain to emotional pain, others see our pain in a different way as evidenced by the fact that….

3. Physical pain garners more empathy from others than emotional pain.

If you see someone get knocked in the head with a branch or a pole, you’ll most likely panic and go see if they’re alright. However, if you see someone getting verbally abused or bullied, you might just walk away or watch without doing anything or feeling much. To you, emotional pain is worse and hurts a heck of a lot more, but to others, the physical pain looks a whole lot worse. Studies show that we constantly underestimate others’ emotional pain compared to their physical pain.

4. Emotional pain echoes in ways that physical pain does not.

When I was ten, I loved pecan pie like nobody’s business. I adored the stuff. However, on New Years, we had pecan pie for dessert and I contracted the stomach flu a few hours later. The trauma of being sick after having my favorite dessert ruined my love for the pie forever. Even the smell of the pie makes me gag. I can’t enjoy it anymore and I don’t think I ever will. Emotional pain is a lot like that experience. If you get a call about a loved landing in the hospital after a car accident or other incident, while enjoying a favorite movie, you may never enjoy that movie again. The emotional pain or shock you experienced while doing that activity will ruin it for years. That movie or activity will constantly bring up the pain you felt while participating in it.

5. Emotional pain but not physical pain can damage our self-esteem and long-term mental health.

Breaking your leg skiing won’t emotionally scar your for the rest of your life unless the actual event was emotionally painful. But being bullied as a child can emotionally scar you for a long time. It can damage your self-esteem and cause you to be extremely self-conscious about a particular feature that was the pinpoint of bullying. Long-term effects are often the case with emotional trauma as a child or teen, or even adult.

However, there are some exceptions to this. Physical pain, such as falling off a horse and breaking an ankle, can cause people to be wary about doing the activity again. If the horse bucked and freaked out, the shock of it can cause emotional pain, causing one to refuse to trust horses again, but this is not always the case. Physical pain can cause one to be wary of many things.

Have you seen this phenomenon echo in your own life? If so, what happened?

Why We Fear The Things We Do ? What exactly is a phobia?

2020-12-09T00:31:00.015-08:00

The amygdala is probably one of the smallest structures in the human brain. It’s just a tiny mass of neurons (Bailey, 2014). It’d be easy to dismiss it, but you shouldn’t-and here’s why. The amygdala has a lot on its plate. For one, it controls the secretion of hormones that are responsible for fear and aggression (Bailey, 2014). It also interacts with the hippocampus to deal with your memory (Bailey, 2014). It’s no wonder, then, that the amygdala is what is responsible for controlling your phobias.

Why We Fear The Things We Do ?

What exactly is a phobia? How do you know if you have one?

Phobias. Everyone has at least one phobia that they are scared of, even if there is no easy explanation for that fear. No one is totally fearless. But just because you have a phobia-doesn’t mean you can’t overcome it. What exactly is a phobia? How do you know if you have one? It’s pretty simple to figure out. A phobia is an exaggerated, usually inexplicable and illogical fear of a particular object, class of objects, or situation (Webster, 2015). If you have a phobia, more than likely you are aware of it.

What is the cause of phobia?

But what causes them? Is it innately born like brown hair or blue eyes? Or is it something we learn in our formative years? Can we form phobias at any age? To answer the first question-Is it something innately born, the answer is probably not.

The research conducted shows that a genetic link is highly unlikely (Goode, 2015). It’s much more likely that phobias are the product of our environment or experiences. Consider the possibly of a child raised in a home where the mother or father had a phobia of snakes due to a past experience.

If that child is raised in the atmosphere of fearing snakes, his or her phobia could be a product of mere conditioning-rather than the experience happening directly to them (Goode, 2015).

Experiences are the most common reasons for developing phobias(Goode, 2015). Consider the study Freud conducted on a child of his colleagues. The child had a phobia of horses. Freud explained it as a facet of the Oedipal Complex-the child transferred his fear of his large, powerful father unto the horses. Later it was revealed that the incident that caused the child’s fear of horses happened on a walk around with the nanny, when a large horse loudly collapsed and died near the child(Goode, 2015).

Two more possible options as reasons why phobias form are social conditioning and physiological disorders (Goode, 2015). Social conditioning causing phobias is a real possibility. Consider the spike in the last half century in personal hygiene.

The average TV watcher could see hundreds or thousands of ads for every kind of disinfectant out there. Take someone who already has a phobia or has the tendency to develop one, and surround them in an environment like that–Boom. Socially born phobia. No traumatic experience took place, but the bombardment convinced them in some way that this is a problem– and they need to take every possible precaution. While this phobia may be a factor in some people’s OCD involving cleanliness, i.e.

washing hands over and over until they bleed, it does not walk hand in hand in every case (Goode, 2015). Now, for physiological disorders, some professionals merely see phobias as a sub-set of the Anxiety disorder–it is just presenting itself in a different way than normal. In that case, the doctor would more than likely prescribe anti-anxiety medication as treatment. Get rid of the anxiety, get rid of the irrational phobia.

But it is important to realize that while by definition phobias are irrational, the people afflicted by them are not likely to see them that way. Phobias are real and they feel real, gripping, and the strong, intense emotions experienced by people with phobias make this no laughing matter. If a phobia is infringing on a loved one’s quality of life, then you should intervene–but do so carefully.

Do not belittle what they are going through and seek the counsel of a trained professional. Phobias seem irrational and silly to those not suffering them, and it is easy to say, “Just get over it.” But keep in mind that people who are living with phobias cannot just decide not to be afraid, just as sick people cannot just decide to be healthy instead.

Beautiful Minds and Their Psychological Attraction

2020-11-13T23:15:00.005-08:00

In the past couple years it’s become exceedingly easier to meet people in the dating sphere with Tinder making your intentions relatively clear with a right swipe or a winky face emoji before going out on a Saturday night. As of late, dating has become a socially outlawed process and the fine art of stumbling over your words as you approach that special someone has become the butt of many cringe worthy high school movies. The questions that have plagued social psychologists include, do opposites really attract? Does the “nice guy” phenomenon actually exist? Excluding the biological factors of a person, are some people just more psychologically attractive than others?

The 2014 film release of Love, Rosie was an example of the idea that partners that are somewhat similar can form complex and intense interpersonal relationships, which gives weight to the saying “birds of a feather flock together.” A study conducted by Eva Klohnen and Shanhong Luo, found that couples often shared a degree of similarity in terms of attitude domains in relation to values in life, political views and religious attitudes.

On the other awkwardly placed hand of dating methodologies is the idea that partners should be opposite and complimentary to each other. Movies such as 10 Things I Hate About You and every other high school film reinforces the idea that opposites do actually attract. Florence Kaslow found that in extreme cases of personality disorders (PD) the opposing PD was more attractive in potential mates. The notion that having two opposites attract is not as far fetched as it seems, since in Dr. Kaslow’s study, it makes reference to the fact that each partner lacked the trait of their partner and almost felt as if that their partners were their missing part, and they made each other complete. The two extremes of personality do appear to attract in the formation of interpersonal relationships.

A combination of the two dating ideals, opposites attracting and birds of a feather flocking together, appears to be at work as having a polar opposite partner would result in a conflict heavy and abrasive relationship. Whereas having a partner who is the exact same person as you would be boring and mundane. A good relationship has a healthy mix of conflict and similarity between the two partners.

Does the nice guy phenomenon actually exist?

The nice guy phenomenon or the notion that “nice guys always finish last” is that being overly nice drives females away to other guys, which are the polar opposites. Does the nice guy phenomenon actually exist? Or is it merely a case of egocentric male thinking?

A “nice guy” is often defined in Internet and popular culture as a male who is stereotypically being overly nice towards females to establish a romantic relationship. A prime example of the nice guy phenomenon is the 1999 release of Notting Hill with the “nice guy” being portrayed as the hero of the story.

In a 2005 study conducted by Anita K. McDaniel of University of North Carolina Wilmington showed that females actually preferred a “nicer” guy for relationship exclusivity, stimulating conversation and non-physical relations. Another study conducted by ES Herold and Robin Milhausen of the University of Guelph found that there were trends to attraction between the “nice guys” and the females. In the study, females that had few sexual partners and placed less of an emphasis on sexual intimacy were shown to be more likely to be attracted to the “nice guys”. The conclusions that were drawn from the study were that “nice guys” had fewer sexual partners but were more preferred as exclusive partners.

It appears that there is a psychological basis for attraction alongside the biological factors, which reinforces the idea of beautiful minds and falling in love with personality. The next time you find yourself in a social situation don’t forget, you can catch more flies with honey, but you can catch more honeys being fly.

Men, Don’t Hate the F-word: FEMINISM

2020-11-01T21:16:00.012-08:00

Men, Don’t Hate the F-word: FEMINISM

I’ve had men admitting they wouldn’t date me because I described myself as a ‘feminist’. True story.

I have met men who dislike feminists because they think it’s a group of women who only protest for women’s rights and get defensive all up in their face. Other men don’t like the word ‘feminism’ because the word appeals more to the females rather than both sexes, and they think it should be reworded to ‘equalism’. And some men don’t see that sexism exists and think it’s just a ploy created by feminists. These are the types of men I’ve encountered and I’m sure you’ve encountered other men who dislikes feminism for various reasons. However, the men I’ve described above (except the men who don’t think sexism exists), acknowledges that feminism is about equality between genders, yet they rather not associate themselves with the feminist movement, since they feel emasculated by it. I want men embrace feminism, so that’s why I’m writing this.

Myths about feminism

Women want power over men: no. We want equality.
Feminist women hate men: no. Equality between genders!
Women lack empathy for men who mistreats women: yes. Of course, us feminist ladies will not tolerant abuse, harassment and violence. However, some men would run away from feminism, because they don’t tolerate women publicly shaming and mocking men.

Role of Men in Feminism

Men, you do have a role in the feminist movement. Without men, I believe the feminist movement cannot advance itself. I have listed the main roles of men below (Phillips, 2015):

Men should play a supportive role for women. This is because under patriarchy, women are treated in a sexist manner and this causes oppression. However, the patriarchy can also harm men, but not in a severe way compared to women. Therefore, men should support women who are leading and empowering themselves.
When it comes to sexism, men do not face what women do and the feminist movement needs men to understand that.
Give women the chance to speak for themselves and listen to them with respect.
Create safe and welcoming environments. Share the authority and power.
Men should prevent themselves from being dominant over everyone and everything. They need to be flexible and humble.
Courageous to stand up for women.

I’m sure the list can go on and you can definitely add more in the comments below. I believe men and women should cooperate together and disintegrate patriarchal structures, socially constructed genders, strict gender roles, and the power dynamic in these structures (Phillips).

Men, don’t be afraid to call yourself a feminist or be a part of this movement. If it was your grandmother, mother, aunt, sister, niece, cousin, or a friend, you’d want them to have equality in this world too.

Do you identify yourself as a feminist?

go ahead be selfish , Give yourself time

2020-10-29T00:39:00.008-07:00

Time for yourself. What, are you selfish? Inconsiderate of others needs? Self-centered? Heartless? Well, yes and no. In this world of ours today, we are all running around trying to do so many things and fulfill our plethora of responsibilities. Yet, we rarely take time for ourselves. If we do, we are looked upon by others as being lazy, or that we’re not working on something more important, such as our job, taking care of our children, or school work, or we’re just viewed as wasting our time.

give ourselves time to our physical and mental health

However, giving ourselves the gift of time is important to our own physical and mental health. Although, you wouldn’t know it by how others react to our “selfish” actions. “Chronic stress increases the risk of developing health problems,” (Maldonado, 2014) both physical and mental. Our bodies need rest to function properly and for continued peak performance. Too much physical work and we wear our bodies down. We become fatigued and then ill, and susceptible to other physical ailments. Yes, this is what sleep is for, however as many people in the world are continuing to achieve less and less sleep daily, our bodies are not acquiring sufficient recharging. Then there is the need for our mental health. Our minds get overworked and overwhelmed through interactions with others, with learning in school, on the job, as well as going through and thinking about our daily responsibilities. These take a toll on us as well, as we may be going 15-18 hours (or more) a day until we crash at night for an uncomfortable night of sleep. Slowly we begin to not be a able to think straight, start having anxiety or depression; if we aren’t already suffering a mental illness, and be incapable of completing our daily responsibilities. And don’t think the physical and mental are not affixed to each other. A reduction in one can and will affect the other.

How to keep our physical and mental health from collapsing?

To prevent our complete collapse of physical and mental health, we need to be selfish and self-centered. We need to take time out for just us. Be it exercise (yes, I know it’s physical work, but it can be refreshing), going for a walk, reading a good book, listening to music, drawing or painting, meditating, and many other relaxing activities. Any one of these can help you push out the chaos of the day and help you re-center your focus and relieve stress. Now, I’m not saying be selfish for days on end, just take 20-30 minutes out or even an hour if need be. If you can’t take time out each day, schedule a time twice a week.. If possible, schedule it for the same time each day or week. As Ferris Bueller says, “Life moves pretty fast, if you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” Take the time to replenish your physical and mental health. So go ahead be selfish, take time for yourself.