Just Shore Girls http://www.justshoregirls.com Come. Stay. Play. Sat, 28 Aug 2010 03:00:00 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/2.0/JustShoreGirlshttp://feedburner.google.com JSG on Twitter: Week Ending 2010-08-27 http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/JustShoreGirls/~3/FqsADIp6O8c/ http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/27/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-27-2/#comments Sat, 28 Aug 2010 03:00:00 +0000 The Girls http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/27/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-27-2/


]]> http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/27/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-27-2/feed/ 0 http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/27/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-27-2/ Don’t Eat The Daisies. (A Fat Girl & Her New Food Allergies) http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/JustShoreGirls/~3/ctdHwNiJMKo/ http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/24/dont-eat-the-daisies-a-fat-girl-her-new-food-allergies/#comments Tue, 24 Aug 2010 06:03:19 +0000 Tornado Allie http://www.justshoregirls.com/?p=1223

I’m pretty sure if NASA was using gluten-free bread on the Columbia Shuttle’s hull, the horrible explosion that cost seven lives never would have happened. This shit is seriously heat resistant. Why aren’t we making firehouse equipment out of this stuff? I stick a couple of slices of it in the toaster on HIGH for the FULL duration and it comes out the same color, just slightly warm. Anyone who has experienced the joy of owning a cheap fire-hazard toaster knows that any mortal bread would be an unrecognizable square of cinders.

The gluten-free bread is a recent addition to my life, along with the laundry list of things I can no longer eat, which I will share with you now: *deep breath*

Sugar

Barley malt (beer)

maple syrup

ketchup

salad dressings

soymilk

ALL GRAINS such as: wheat, spelt, kamut, oats, rye, barley, millet, bulgur, buckwheat, amaranth, quinoa, and teff.*

Crackers

cakes

cookies

bread

pasta

flours

cereals

rolls

potatoes (white or sweet)

yams

parsnips

chikpeas

soybeans

carrageenan

tofu

tempeh

ALL SOY.

*I don’t really know what half of these grains are, and I’m glad of it. It’s fifty less things to miss. I don’t think I’ve ever woken up in the morning and said “Gee, I’d really like some teff today…”, Nor have I ever been asked, “How ’bout a nice bowl of teff?”

Why all of the dietary restrictions, you ask? WELL..I went to Israel two months ago and developed a big, fat infection on my right leg. I suffered from mild edema and had to take a METRIC FUCKTON of antibiotics. The meds saved my leg, but in turn destroyed all of the good bacteria in my guts and caused all kinds of belly gremlins. End result: I have been diagnosed with Celiacs, which is an intolerance to gluten (found in flour), and on top of that I am deathly allergic to soy, which Summer can attest to, as she’s the poor bastard who got stuck cleaning my puke off of the ceiling the last time we had tofu wings.

This leaves me with the question: What CAN I eat now? The answer: not much.

Tons of things have gluten in them and we don’t even realize we’re eating it. Almost every processed food out there uses it as a thickener. I have my eyes very wide open and now I’m super-aware of what I eat. I’d rather not slip up and spend my evening curled in the fetal position or making deals with god in the can that if he just makes my guts stop ka-sploding, I will never, ever eat anything ever again.

The other edge of this sword for me is that things which proudly display the “Gluten Free” seal of approval usually have soy or some sort of soy derivative inside that will make me yak kittens for hours. Under the doctors orders, I went out and grabbed almond milk to put in my gluten-free cereal (really quite delicious by Bakery on Main – Wegmans) only to find tht it contains soy lecithin. FUCK. Fortunately, real milk doesn’t do much to me besides give me really awesome breath, so I poured myself a bowl and stared hatefully at the box of almond trickery while I crunched my sorghum-based flakes.

This is my life lately. I just wanted to say if anyone else is going through this life-altering change, hit me up. We’ll talk about options and alternatives. I have a ton to learn.

www.celiaccess.com


]]> http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/24/dont-eat-the-daisies-a-fat-girl-her-new-food-allergies/feed/ 1 http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/24/dont-eat-the-daisies-a-fat-girl-her-new-food-allergies/ JSG on Twitter: Week Ending 2010-08-20 http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/JustShoreGirls/~3/aZABq0aJugw/ http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/20/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-20-2/#comments Sat, 21 Aug 2010 03:00:00 +0000 The Girls http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/20/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-20-2/


]]> http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/20/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-20-2/feed/ 0 http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/20/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-20-2/ JSG on Twitter: Week Ending 2010-08-13 http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/JustShoreGirls/~3/bQH9CvMPrZ4/ http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/13/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-13-2/#comments Sat, 14 Aug 2010 03:00:00 +0000 The Girls http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/13/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-13-2/


]]> http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/13/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-13-2/feed/ 0 http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/13/jsg-on-twitter-week-ending-2010-08-13-2/ The Glass Closet http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/JustShoreGirls/~3/cSrFHQSd7ec/ http://www.justshoregirls.com/2010/08/11/the-glass-closet/#comments Wed, 11 Aug 2010 07:10:07 +0000 Tornado Allie http://www.justshoregirls.com/?p=1007

I am butch.

Let’s just get that out of the way. I have my feminine attributes; but I am, for all the world to see, as gay as a glitter-farting unicorn.

That said, I have never really had to come out to anyone. You’d have to be blind or Mormon to not see how blatantly les I am. From my shaved head to my classic converse, I am as comfortable in my own skin as I can be in a culture where skinny, flippy-haired pixie women are worshipped as demigods in the church of high expectations – but that’s a whole ‘nother blog.

Back to how naturally gay I am.

It made coming out really easy.

What made it easier was my mom walking in on my girlfriend at the time and myself while we were…um…doin’ stuff.

I was 15.

Yep, folks – no muss, no fuss, no weepy “Mom and Dad? I have something to tell you,” at age 22 after forcing myself through however many sham heterosexual relationships it would have taken for me to go crazy and stop caring.

I never had to tell my friends. I never had to tell my extended family. I mentioned it in passing once or twice and they all just…accepted it. It was pretty wonderful, actually.

I got lucky.

I am not a femme. I don’t have to face the reality of coming out of the closet over and over again to people who think they know what a lesbian “looks like” for the rest of my life.

I consider that bullet dodged.


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